Coming Out of the Closets. by Voracity2
Summary: An idiot trying to warn about HYDRA outs other things. Like demons. And slayers. And magical communities. Oops. Well, the chaos is probably happy for someone somewhere.
Categories: Buffy Stories & Crossovers > Avengers, Buffy Stories & Crossovers > Harry Potter Characters: None
Series: None
Chapters: 5 Completed: Yes Word count: 74525 Read: 15090 Published: 03/17/2023 Updated: 03/17/2023

1. Part 1 by Voracity2

2. Part 2 by Voracity2

3. Part 3 by Voracity2

4. Part 4 by Voracity2

5. Part 5 by Voracity2

Part 1 by Voracity2
Coming Out of the Closets.





HYDRA was falling. They were failing at gathering new members, they hadn't been able to scare anyone into allegiance. The people against them were annoying. SHIELD was starting to get very strong. So they had to do something to scare the world so they could gain power. But how? The higher ups were dry on everything but recruitment from all agencies to make sure they could take the over easily. That wouldn't get the people on their side.

The PR team meeting was not coming up with anything. Even after someone came in with a nearly radiation sort of glow around them with some coffee that was poisoned for them to drink. The higher ups were not amused at their failures to lure people to their side of the battle.

So what were they to do? HYDRA could not fall for good in 2007.

***

One of the turncoats to HYDRA was in front of the press. He knew how to make people scared by talking about his former masters, who were amused that he could say anything real about them. He had been a lower level flunkie, not even in charge of anything.

Yet, here was, holding a slight press conference. "I am Senior Agent Gordon, formerly of the FBI and of HYDRA simultaneously," he noted patiently. The reporters gave him odd looks. "I turned against HYDRA because they wanted to take my children to experiment on. Thankfully I managed to hide them in a place they can't look."

He smiled. "You see, HYDRA is going to find a way to scare you all into looking toward them for safety and security. That's their present goal. To get the normal, average human to think positively of them so they can take over easier once someone finally finds a few heros to be figureheads. So I'm here to warn you that the extremists are going to come out with information that could very well warp humanity's way of thinking.

"Including about alternative communities." He cleared his throat. "You know those horror movies?" He smiled. "HYDRA does too and knows how to get them here. To attack normal people. They've got a group going in Cleveland, or had one anyway until one of those sort took that whole group out for being annoying." He cleared his throat again.

And that's when the demon showed up.

"Human!" he shouted. "Quit outing us!"

The agent looked at him, blinking hard. "I'm not trying to, though I do not know what you actually are. I'm outing HYDRA! Did you have something to do with their group in Cleveland or London?"

The demon snorted, staring at him. "No!" He shook his head. "We've already made sure they know not to use the demonic or magical communities for that. They'll fail. If only because all the slayers will take them out. And then pout about it."

The agent blinked. "I have not heard a thing about slayers."

"Mystically chosen females who fight demons?" the demon suggested. The agent shook his head quickly, getting away from the microphone. "They would end me for outing them."

"Ya think?" a male voice said dryly then the demon's head exploded. It showed a skinny white guy with dark hair, sunglasses, and a scarf around the bottom of his face. He had a shotgun. "Yeah! Probably." He looked at the agent. "Are you *trying* to be worse than they are at hurting humanity?"

"I'm trying to warn them that HYDRA is going to out those sort. I didn't mean to drag one of them here to prove it."

"Who are you?" a reporter yelled.

"Robin. Batman's in Africa." He glared at the agent. "I'd hide, dude. I'd hide so damn hard." He ran off. New agents were showing up. They were going to try to confiscate the bodies, the reporters, the HYDRA agent, everything they could to stop that from getting out. A few reporters were live though.

One was live to FOX news. It was probably the only time that network ran a story without editing it. Governmental over-compensation? Demons being real? HYDRA having a plot to get people on their side by making new heros? All things they loved to shout about.

One of their security experts even managed to find out who that guy probably was. Though they disappeared from telling everyone before he got out their name thanks to the big worm looking demon appearing behind him and eating his head. The reporters were grossed out but they got to talk about new things.

US President Bush showed up at a press call to answer that question. He sighed, looking at the group. "Did we actually manage to cover up a town falling in a few years ago and an invasion in Los Angeles that well?" he asked. "I know some sites online have been talking about this since before that town fell in. Everyone just considered them weird little conspiracy theorists."

He smiled. "Well, surprise. Even a coverup isn't perfect. We thought you guys would've figured that out long before 2007." He walked off, leaving them to talk about things. His wife was upset, he had to calm her down first. He wanted nothing to do with this topic anyway. It gave him the creeps.

The press secretary Dana Perino sighed, looking at him walking off then at the press corps. "We have known since a town fell to a suspicious sink hole back in 2004. Then we looked into how that happened. It meant we looked at that town before then and realized something very strange was going on.

"No one seemed concerned that they had a death statistic yearly for death by barbeque fork." She held up a hand for them to quit talking about that, shaking her head. "We wisely asked. The head of the FBI at that time had no idea and the agents that did have ideas didn't want to share." She smiled. "Neither did the rest of them who had an idea. So we dug deeper.

"We formed a quiet task force to look into that. And we were horrified. We're being protected by a group of mystically chosen young women. The First Lady was ready to go there to make sure they were healthy warriors. A few of us were worried they'd teach her how to use a sword. So we looked farther and we talked to them, and then there was an invasion in LA. We got very peeved at them trying to hide that."

"That was listed as a movie scene," one reporter said, standing up. "It wasn't?"

"No. We all wanted it to be. We even tried to wish for it very hard," she said dryly. Then she smirked. "I'm told that wish demons might've shown up but they didn't this time." The reporter sat down. "I'll do a full briefing in a few days on what we know about all this mess. And about HYDRA still being around. For right now, we all have a headache and I've got to pull together notes."

"Who was that guy?"

She grimaced. "I *think* it was a member of their staff but I'm not totally certain. I'm pretty sure but I have to find that out so someone can yell." She walked off. "Give me two days please."

The reporters shared a look. This was the least formal they'd ever been given information. There was clearly something going on. And what had that thing been?

***

The young guy walked into the house, getting glared at. "Did I have another choice?" Andrew asked.

"No," Giles admitted as he came out there. "Not in the least. At least you didn't try to behead him with a sword. It'd end up with us being crucified in the press when they find us." He looked at the other watchers. "The president has just all but outed us. His press secretary said she'd give details about all this nonsense in two days.

"The President noted the paranoid people online and the invasion." The other watchers groaned. "Andrew did try to mask who he was, including noting that Xander is in Africa." He looked at them. "We have the real possibility of anyone overseas we've worked with coming forward as well. Also, remember that being admitted to the magical community as well."

They shared a look. "We'll get word back," one decided. "How do we cover up the girls?"

"We may not be able to," Andrew said. "There's fanpages online for some of them. People who've been saved. The LA group has one from a shelter worker out there." They groaned again. "We need to put out a warning. I doubt Xander gets CNN in Burkina Faso, where he is for the next week. Or Amblin in Thailand or even our girl in China. We need to set a party line during a long losing-our-minds conference." He looked at Giles. "I can call Xander and Amblin to call in."

"Let us work some of this out here first," Giles ordered. "If one of the people down there come forward, we'll deal with it. Finding Xander is hard enough if you know where he is and who he is. He can probably hide and move the girls into better secured areas too." They went to the kitchen to talk about it. Andrew followed them, it was his kitchen.

***

In England, a former watcher went to a nice telephone booth, dialing in. "This is Watcher Hayes with Official Business for the Minister. Priority One." They let him down and scanned him as he walked over. A few aurors met him. "The US had an agent and a demon out us, your people, and demons." The head auror blinked a few times, shaking his head slowly. He showed him the tape on the portable system he was carrying. It had both the agent's press conference and the president's.

"SHITE!" an auror complained loudly, getting attention. "The US," he said with a hand wave, making people pretend to ignore them.

His boss nodded. "Quite, but be less loud. Let's go upstairs, Watcher Hayes." He led them up there to the Minister's office. "It's bad," he noted. "Get the other ministers in," he told the secretary, who called them all to an emergency meeting. Watcher Hayes replayed the tape for the minister himself and let him think while everyone else got there. Then he replayed it for the room at large. The head auror looked at the group. "That second is the US President's people. And him originally."

The Minister for Magic looked at him. "That's not the MaCUSA president."

"No, that's the regular US President, sir. The MaCUSA one is in Omaha this week on vacation with his new grandchild by his people's notes. They've probably at least sent him a note." The Minister grimaced. The auror was thanking every god that Fudge was no longer in charge. "We can call him."

"His people probably already have," he decided. "So we've been officially outed. Even partially. People, how do we handle this?"

The Under Ministers all stared at each other then at him. "Guards around our gathering spots like the Leaky," one noted. "We'll need them to keep curious muggles out."

"Do we want to warn the magical community now or later?" another asked. "If we hide it, they'll going to roast us for not warning."

"The Prophet has the office bugged," the Minister said dryly. "It'll be front page tomorrow I'm sure." They all nodded. "What about other countries?"

"No clue," Watcher Hayes said. "We don't have a liaison with anyone but yours and the Canadians. There's a magical part of the US? Why haven't we seen them?"

"I have no idea," the Minister said with a smile. "Are you one of ours? Or a squib sibling?"

"I have some magic but not enough to go to the schools. The last head made me the liaison and when I retired Rupert Giles, the current head Watcher, bade me stay in this role in case of things like this."

"That's fine." He waved a hand. "How bad will it get?"

"We have no idea and we're probably doing a bit of panicking while figuring out how open we need to be to protect ourselves and yet cover the girls."

"I forgot about the slayers," the head auror muttered. "We have a few over here."

"The local house is about seven blocks away," Hayes agreed. "I'll stop in on them in a bit." That got a nod from the aurors. "This was just warning you that someone's told and opened the Box that's about to make Pandora's look sweet and nice."

"Thank you for that warning, Watcher Hayes," the head auror said. "We'll escort you out?" He nodded, taking the tape with him to show the girls. He came back to an argument in process. "Do we have a liaison with the UK government?" he asked to break it up. It was unproductive and he was getting a headache from just a few minutes of it.

"Yes," the Minister said with a smile. "Your department does. Get them here? That way we know if they're willing to help us."

"I can call ours," he said, going to do that. This was such a mess.

***

Andrew was wrong, CNN was international, even in Burkina Faso. Though Xander didn't watch the news. Ever. So he wasn't shocked when a general walked up to him because he was there to train the local girl, who was ten. That general was his liaison with the local government and military. "What's up?" he asked, shaking his hand.

"Have you watched the news, Watcher Harris?"

"Oooh, formal. Another bad incident that didn't get covered up?"

"Yes, some agent who had been HYDRA outed them, then a demon showed up to finish outing demon kind and the magical community?"

"There's not one near here," he admitted. "That guy with the robe incident before last? His people."

"Ah!" He smiled and nodded. "Wonderful! They don't live here."

"They're in the next country over," he said with a point. "But hidden. They're all hidden. They have rules not to let normal people know about them. How open was it blown?"

"The US President mentioned the invasion that got covered up somehow."

Xander snorted, then shook his head with a sigh. "Great. I'll tap out a message for my girls to go into hiding. The local responses?"

"They've seen your adult slayers protecting us. They won't attack them I don't think." Xander grinned at that. "But it's about to get messy probably."

"Yeah, I'm about to make one myself I think." The general smiled as he left him to angst in peace. Xander called in. "Giles, how open are we blown and what's my line beyond getting my girls hidden and possibly moved?" He listened to him talk about that. "I knew about them. I had one show up to a battle. No, I had a general show up to ask me.

"No, we get CNN, FOX, and BBC news down here," he said dryly, sipping his beer. "I wanted a night off, Giles. Yeah, I'm going to warn my girls to go into hiding and possibly move. Anything else I can do?" He nodded once. "That's not up to me. Some countries do have battle videos to show their trainees in the military.

"If they release them then I have nothing to do with that. I can't even ask them not to because they'll do it because I asked." He took another gulp. "Sure. Thanks. Let me know." He hung up and finished his beer, paying a tip for the bartender, who grinned at him. "It's going to be a long few months." He walked off calling all his girls.

"It's me," he noted once they were in the conference. "The Council has been noted in the news. I want all you girls to protect yourselves and your families. If a reporter or someone comes up to you, scream and run away. Right now, we're not admitting to anything. Yeah, that guy was Andrew," he said with a grimace. "I didn't see that. I don't tend to watch the regular news.

"Okay," he sighed, rubbing his forehead. "For now, that's the standing order. Hide in plain sight if possible. If not, hide at home and pretend to be sick or something, or possibly move. Let me know if you do get noted anywhere. I'm going to be freaking out for a few hours. Thanks, girls." He hung up, got into his truck to drive outside the town, and had a hissy fit that made the nearby demons give him scared looks.

Then he went to visit their council. He walked in and bowed properly. "There was a demon who outed demon kind in the US," he noted in greeting. They all grimaced but nodded they knew that. "Including the slayers, the magical communities, and noted that there's one of us down here.

"We're really sorry. I've ordered the girls to hide in plain sight if you need us, but I have no idea how to stop this." The head of the council smiled and nodded. "We have no idea how deep it'll get outed either, Elder."

"We know. We're all in shock too. Especially that Andrew blew that demon's head off."

Xander grinned. "I knew teaching him to shoot was a good idea, no matter what Giles said." They grinned at him. "We're *really* sorry though."

"It is not your doing, Harris." He nodded and left them to talk. He had to finish his fit and figure out what he was doing this time.

***

Someone in the Home Office in England went jogging up the halls after getting a phone call. "Sir," he shouted, stopping his boss on his way to the bathroom. "Sir, phone call from the MoM."

"The what now, Branderson?" he demanded.

"Oh, dear, were you not briefed about Diagon and all that?" he hissed at him, looking horrified.

"Yes."

"Their ministry, sir."

"Oh!" He nodded. "Another escaped criminal?"

"The US outed all that nonsense, and the Council." His boss winced but nodded once. He also burped because he now had heartburn. "It was on the news. They held a presser after some guy claiming to be HYDRA outed himself and then a demon showed up."

"Well, that's not good," he decided. "All right. Let me visit the head and then we'll see what we need to do."

"We need to warn higher ups, Sir. There's nothing much we can do but spread the heartburn around now."

"Charming!" He smiled and nodded. "Make a list of who you have to brief."

"Yes, sir." He went to do that. Of course his boss had put the pressure back on his back. This was going to be interesting when the group showed up for the meeting. He had found the watcher, who showed up with the video. Agent Branderson looked at the group after they had watched the video.

"That does open up a point of contention within the UK. That magical community they mentioned? We have some here. Each country has a magical area hidden. Most have schools as well. All they know to do is put up guards." Agent Branderson looked around hoping for ideas.

One of them cleared his throat. "So we're going to have people coming to look at all that?"

"It's in the press, Lad." Watcher Hayes smiled at him. "It outed the Council as well. We may be able to finally find someone to go pick through the remains of the old building as well. That does bring up the safety of the slayer house nearby. It also brings up the fact that we have people in most countries or at least nearby, and Watchers training the girls at home now. There's been a ton of changes since the old Council blew up. Including a lot of battles that were hidden."

The lower agent grimaced at that. "All right, so we've got few secrets left then." The others grimaced at that. "Our hidden agencies?"

"We have two groups that use magical or other types of beings in service," one said quietly. "This is going to be bad." He looked at Hayes. "Who was that young man? I've heard you've got one bouncy one somewhere."

"No, that was Andrew, the house mother for the Cleveland house. Our bouncy one is Xander Harris and he's in Africa. He's the watcher down there training the girls at home. We no longer raise the girls ourselves. They train at home unless their home is unsuitable. Then they go to the houses in America. They have an orphan's house that's carefully hidden for those and the girls in social services care."

The others shared a look then nodded at that information. "So we've got multiple communities coming open," Branderson said. "We have a polite, peaceful demonic community locally. They have their own council and all that stuff. Schools as well." Hayes nodded at that. "They handle their own business. But this will bring zealots. I'm surprised we've only seen a few religious groups having a fit."

"True, I had forgotten about them," the palace's head of security noted, making himself a note. "Where is our peaceful council place?" It got looked up by Hayes and handed over. "Thank you. In case we need to liaison with them."

"They like the local slayers. They're respectful of peaceful sorts," Hayes said. "Buffy insisted they all be taught how to be nice to peaceful beings no matter their species."

"That's good of them," that officer said. He looked at Branderson. "Our magical community?"

"They have their own ministry and all that, plus schools and shopping areas, all that necessary things. All they can think of doing is setting guards to make sure they don't get gawkers."

"Those religious sorts would have a fit about them as well," Hayes said with a single nod. "Maybe even more of one because they're humans."

"It would also let others know that the magical sorts had a serial killer who was killing off some of their kind in mass numbers up until a few years ago," Branderson said, looking at the person from Scotland Yard. Who grimaced but nodded. "He is gone?"

"He is gone," he assured him.

"That's good news at least." They settled in to make plans of how to handle the upheaval. People were going to riot when they found out how much had been hidden from them.

***

The next battle that got noted, it was televised. No one on the field realized that but a news crew had been slipped that information so was there to watch from afar. It didn't look great on the Council, Xander had a fit on someone, twice, but it had been necessary to get them to bring weapons. That general was huffy but he also nearly got his head eaten by something unrelated. Which Xander smirked at him about when he complained.

The news crew was on a nearby field but heard the 'that's why I warned you to bring weapons!' from Xander. And the girls laughing about that. "Ladies, flying menaces to life," he ordered with a point. "Then hit the demons they're eating. Since they so *kindly* brought their pets, they can play with them until we're done." The soldiers cheered because they could shoot the flying menaces but not the demons. That they handled anyway.

The news crew were stunned. They had no idea there had been *battles*! With weapons and swords and militaries. This was going to be huge.

That general found out that night from the news program while he was filling out reports. Then he sent out a message to his soldiers to ignore all press people. One of them told Xander to be nice to him - hoping next battle it'd give him a better spot in the rear of the line.

Xander was thankfully a few countries away with the slayers, who were flying back to their homes while he went to visit the next mini to work with her. So he groaned and got a drink from the stewardess. He could really use a drink.

***

Buffy walked in and slammed the door, leaning against it. "They found us," she called. "We've got an infestation of reporters, ladies. Don't go outside."

"That'll suck for the kids coming home from school," Faith called back. "'Drew, can you go pick up the girls?"

"Too late," he yelled from the kitchen. "They're already on their way home. Someone go put up a smoke screen to protect them from being photographed." Buffy went to tell Willow, who did that for the girls as soon as the bus got there.

Willow looked at the reporters. "We're guarding the little girls' lives from you guys," she noted impatiently when she got yelled at. "People like you would kill them for being chosen before they were born. Before you protest, we've already had that tried by a few groups. So shoo!" she said, making it a compulsion. The reporters all trudged off, still reporting.

She got the older girls into the house under smoke cover too. "I have the feeling we're going to be going to apocalypse battle prep status, ladies. So get the homework online please. Let Giles talk to the principals." She followed the last one in after doing a head count. One girl was with her friends and a few had after school jobs but they could sneak into the back gate easier anyway.

She went to tell Giles that and he did call the principals to warn them that the girls were going to be staying home for their own protection for a bit. Until things got straightened out. Willow sent out a memo to all the other slayers to be careful. This was going to be stupid before it got better.

*** (sent to the list here via email)

Xander looked at the minister there to harass his mini. "She was born that way," he noted impatiently, shoving the guy away from her. Again. "Unlike you who *chose* to be this way against a little girl." He pointed. "I'd leave. Right the hell now before I send you to ask your God yourself about rules for slayers."

The priest tried to have him removed, he did have a few officers, but they weren't going to get near the mini slayer or her family. Or Xander really. They were sure he had weapons on him that they couldn't counter. Or a demon nearby. This town really didn't like their slayer but she protected them so they'd put up with it until someone moved her for her own safety.

The mother stepped out. "You said God had us made as we should be. She was born marked and Chosen. Therefore you lied about children being born like God intended and if you hate how she's born then you're against God's will." The priest tried to hit her so Xander punched him. "Watcher Harris, I'm fine," she soothed.

"Bullshit. You shouldn't ever hit a woman protecting her family." He grinned at her. "That's what guys are for!" She snorted, going back inside. He looked at the officers, who gathered the priest to take him to their office to talk to him about all that. "So," he said, walking into the house. "Who're you going to visit for all your safety?"

"My sister is in Tunisia," she said. "I've already called. She'll be waiting on us to get in tomorrow morning if we drive all night."

"Okay. Good choice." He helped her pack what needed to go. Including the baby slayer's stuff. She was only four and didn't understand. Xander grinned at her. "You're going to visit your auntie because the locals are being too loud," he told her. "For now, just relax, let it happen, let your mom yell at people. Okay?" She nodded with a smile and a hug for him.

"Good girl. Study hard. I want to see you graduate school." He patted her on the head and handed her to her mother, who smiled and he guarded them while they fled for their lives. Because that priest was about to burn the whole family in their house. Xander went to talk to the police himself. "She's left the city," he said in greeting when an officer spotted him. They sighed in relief. "That priest?"

"His higher ups don't agree with his ideas of cleansing fire but they do not like slayers either."

"Sucks to be them since the Council's been around longer than their religion," Xander said dryly. The officer blinked at that. Xander nodded. "The first slayer was an earlier human of some kind."

"Oh." He winced. "That's not going to go over well."

"Neither will the history that actually started with demon courts ruling most of the world." He grinned. "That city they found and then covered up quietly? One of theirs." The officer winced again. "Yeah. So much screaming coming." He waved a hand. "But she's safe for now and all my others are in hiding." He walked off. "Have fun with the priest."

"Not really." He went to have a word with his boss about all that. No, no one was going to be happy with anything for months on end. They still had to find out if they had a magical community nearby beyond the ancient healer sorts.

***

Willow got called to the White House for a meeting with Giles. She wasn't sure why her but the others had insisted and she could at least protect Giles for them. She smiled as she was let into the conference room. "Hey. Willow Rosenburg of the Council." She nodded politely at the man in there.

"I'm the Head Auror of the United States, Miss Rosenburg."

"What's an auror?"

"We're the magical police."

She snorted. "Then you're clearly behind on your job. Where were you when Sunnydale got founded?" He went to angry stages of red in the face. "Where were you when our town had an ascension and my graduation became a battle? Or when we had a fifty-percent death rate for a long time in there before a slayer got there?

"Did *your* people stop the military torturing demons? Hmm?" She stared at him. "Since I know the answers to all that is 'I ignored it in favor of teenagers doing it' I'm not that impressed." He got up and stomped off. "Bye!" She smiled at Giles. "I don't like people who claim status that never do things."

"I've seen such happen in the past," he admitted. "Though it is odd that the Magical Congress of the USA did not do a single *thing* about Sunnydale over the centuries," he told another one. "Through yearly apocalypse battles."

"You're welcome for still being here," she quipped with a smile for them. "We teenagers that handled it for you are still handling it for you apparently though. Now, what're we here to discuss today?"

The others in charge stared at her. "Young lady, there's a magical government in place."

She snorted. "Yes, we've seen how pitiful it is. Where was your person in Sunnydale? Or in Cleveland? Or at the invasion in LA? Did any of yours show up?"

"That's not our business."

"It is your business because you're living on this planet," she said. "A lot of it was magical in nature. Did you even show up to find out what had happened? Or were you all satisfied to let the slayers handle it for you? Because I never saw a single one of you, even when I nearly ended humanity in my grief." The others flinched. She smiled. "Thankfully there was a coven not associated with the idiots in robes in England who helped me grieve appropriately."

"There are very distinct lines between the two communities," Giles agreed patiently. "None of you have ever liked the more natural living magicals. None of you respect us either."

"You're a Watcher."

"And a former chaos sorcerer." He smiled. "Back in the old days of the London Coven, people. Thankfully that same coven helped me reform." They all winced at that. "For being the magical government of the US, you've failed us all rather spectacularly. As Willow stated, none of you helped in Sunnydale. Even when we desperately asked the former Council to help.

"Not with the invasion in LA after Sunnydale fell. Not with Cleveland's present problems with that hellmouth. So what exactly do you do?" He walked off, Willow with him. "Perhaps they'll show up to talk to the regular magical community as well," he noted. "It may be nice to have a unified group for a change instead of people who only care about a tiny portion of one group."

"The whole government's that way, Giles." She waved a hand around. "Half of them have no idea what's going on."

"I know." He opened a door and let her proceed him. Which meant she stopped the bullet by magic. He sighed. "Well. That's rather rude." Willow nodded, making that person with the gun sorry. "I wonder if Xander could identify him."

"He doesn't know many bad guys over here. He only knows the ones in Africa probably, Giles. They've probably hit on him." She picked up her new pet chinchilla and walked off petting it. "Shh. We'll get you rehabbed into a better person. The girls will love to spoil you rotten. They could use a new pet. Some of our fish died recently."

Giles followed along behind her with a fake smile. He'd talk to her later about adopting potential threats. The guards around there were giving them extra room just in case.

Willow smiled at one that got out of her way. "We only react to threats," she said sweetly. "You guys didn't stop the threat so we had to." She shrugged. "The Council has that duty too." She used the keys to start the car then got in to drive them off.

Inside, the MaCUSA people were very mad, mostly at themselves. They had no idea about any of that!

***

With permission, Willow decided to give an interview. She liked this reporter. She liked to read her articles, they were well proofread. "Hi." She smiled, sitting down across from her. "I know you guys want to know about the Council so ask me."

The reporter blinked a few times. "You're...."

"Willow. I'm Council, one of the research team and magic team."

"Oh." She pulled out her phone to record this. "So, Miss...."

"Rosenburg." She smiled. "My unfortunate parents will probably have a fit about me claiming my actual name but oh well. It might do their book sales good if they wrote a real one." She leaned her elbows on the table. "I'm with the research arm of the International Council of Watchers. And part of the magical arm as well." She smiled. "Also friend to the senior slayer."

"Slayers. We've heard about them. We have no idea about any of that."

She smiled, pushing over a book she unshrank as she pulled it out of her shirt pocket. "Would the book we give to baby slayers help that any?"

"It unshrank."

"Yes. I can do that." She nodded with a grin. "It's not that hard."

"Okay. I'll come back to that later. What, exactly, is a slayer?"

"Slayers are girls who have a mystically chosen duty to defeat the bad demons in this world."

"Aren't all demons bad?"

"No!" She beamed. "There's a lot that just *are*. They immigrated to get away from hell realms. Some were already here and crossbred. Actually, over eighty percent of the demonic community is peaceful. They have their own councils to make sure it stays that way and any problems or outings are handled immediately and harshly. I think you've seen why they do it that way with the recent religious things."

"I have. So they're not like demons from the Bible?"

"No. Though there are some of those." She smiled with a slight nod. "They're mean and possessions are hard to break. The average demon is called that because the ones who labeled things couldn't see them as sentient human things. So of course they called them demons.

"Just like the UK did to Far Eastern people for centuries because they were different. Some of my favorite people to hang out with are actually other dimensional beings who came here to get an education and a job. We play some kitten poker now and then but I'm not any good at it."

"Kitten....why?"

"One of them is a flesh eating species. They often buy medical waste from places like hospitals but some fresh meat now and then is nice for them. They do breed specifically for the community. I was a bit squicked but I'd rather have them eating a cat now and then that's bred for it than I would something like a living human."

"I can see that. Would they?"

"Some species could. They don't. They know that eating a human gets a slayer to come find them within hours." She smiled. "So they don't. They've found ways to handle things. Some breed special fish or animals for the community. Some just like kittens I guess. Like we like chicken."

"I hadn't thought about different dietary needs. Would those who eat dogs and cats in Asia do that?"

"I don't think they've ever asked."

"Interesting." She considered it. "So what is a slayer? Beyond a girl with a chosen destiny?"

"There's a group of ethereal beings, which if I could find I would punch, called the Powers That Be. They're chess playing gross things apparently who want *balance*. So they pick a girl, mark her with a specific mole on her shoulder, and when she's called she gets the memory download from all the former slayers.

"She gets fighting skills, she gets some minor tactical training, all that in the download. Plus memories like how to fight in a corset and dress. Mostly, our girls use swords and crossbows, and stakes of course. But the later girls learned how to fire off guns if they have to thanks to a few of the watchers being more modern."

She grinned again. "We patrol, we handle big demonic emergencies. Some of us stopped the US Army program that was torturing demons." She shrugged. "But they classified that. Not that I signed an NDA. They just expected us to shut up by trying to scare us."

"So the government knew?"

"Part of it. A lot of Army guys should be ashamed of their people who were there. I would be if they were my people. I am ashamed that they're considered humans."

The reporter nodded at that. "So what does a slayer do?"

"They patrol for new vampires, they take out older vampires, they hunt in clubs to make sure there's as few deaths as possible from any neck biting or other biting creatures. Most of what we do is against the undead but now and then we get a being who is not peaceful and will not leave people alone so we handle those too. And yearly apocalypse battles that're caused by some demons trying to get power or attention."

"We heard rumors of one in LA?"

"That was a law firm's fault, mostly. Their higher ups and a few others from other groups were part of this group called Black Thorn or something." She flicked a hand in the air. "The LA team was handling it but then they heard that they were going to open a portal to invite some biting things over to help them take control of humanity. Whatever was left after the biting things got done. So we showed up to fight the invasion with the LA team, who were partially our former team in Sunnydale."

The reporter stared. "How did that not get seen?"

Willow grinned and chuckled. "You guys said it was a movie thing gone wrong. You've done that for a few of them." She pushed the book over. "Let me flee the angry person stomping over." She winked and disappeared from there.

The reporter moaned. "She just disappeared." She saved down that file on her phone and quickly sent it to someone she trusted who couldn't be vanished. Just in case agents tried to stop her from reporting. She gathered the book and went back to her office to hide.

That book for new slayers was very informative. Her editor was thrilled they had gotten a copy. With the note on the inside cover of 'please be honest about us, no embellishing and no lying' written in a girlish script and signed Buffy Summers. They had no idea who she was. Yet.

***

The president got handed the newest transcripts from that meeting and then the reporter's story. He hummed. "Sounds like the MaCUSA guys are idiots." He looked up at the head of the Secret Service, who handled their needs too.

"They're isolationist. Though, Miss Rosenburg was correct that no one handled anything that the Council has. They have a right to be mad about it too. If the magicals had done something, anything, then Sunnydale probably would still be around and would probably have had fewer deaths."

"How bad?"

"Their last year was a good one. Twenty percent death and disappearance rate, sir."

"That's outrageous."

"Yes." He nodded. "There's something blocking us from caring about it as well."

"Magic?"

"Probably."

"Great!" He put that down. "Can we talk to these Council people?"

"Of course. They're in Cleveland now. Their last branch got blown up in England right before Sunnydale fell. It's thought to be from the same thing but no one's sure. They're secretive as well."

"That book on the Council, can we get a copy?"

"That reporter made copies available to us when we asked. Photocopied from the book in front of us."

"That's good. How long have they been around?"

"They predate Rome." The president huffed. "And writing." That got a slump. "They helped make the rules to ignore them and their former ways. Now they're a lot better to the girls I'm told."

"They were bad?"

"That changed when it got rebuilt. The new ones insisted, sir."

"Good!" He cleared his throat. "Is my wife going to have another ranting fit?"

"About the old Council? Yes. The new one is humane, they're much stronger and better for the girls. They take good care of the ones they have in training. They no longer take the girls in at a very young age to train, but now they're training at home if they want to and show up for specialist training for a few years. They get to make their own decisions now. They get to go to college, have a support system, all that."

The president winced. "She's going to have a fit about the old Council."

"So would my wife, sir. They'd be right to do that but most of them died."

"Great!" He nodded. "Do they have people in other countries?"

"Training the girls at home and helping with bigger things. The one in Africa had no idea that they were aware of these things and were actually handling them but was happy with that and shared training materials that he uses with his girls. He's had them all move for their own safety. The ones in Asia have mostly moved as well. China's slayer is nowhere to be found as far as they've reported. We have no idea if they moved her, if she's alive, or if she's escaped."

"They have one?"

"They have a native one who went back after the invasion to handle her people's needs. After making sure her family left. Just in case."

"Good of her." He nodded. "It mentions apocalypse battles."

"The invasion is counted as one, Sir."

"That's good. I'd consider that an apocalypse too." He looked at the older man. "Now what?"

"We're suggesting we get everyone in one room to figure out how to handle things together to protect the magicals and the slayers. The girls haven't been able to leave the house to go to school for a bit. They've also had groceries delivered."

"That's reasonable. Send a few agents to help them?"

"I can do that though they won't accept." He looked at the article and pointed. "That's sealed Presidential Oversight Only, Sir."

He looked at that and then in his files. "Yup, we done screwed the fuck up," he said, letting him see it. "Get me the head of the Army too. He's got to apologize for his people."

"Gladly." He handed that file back and went to summon that one and send a few agents to help in Cleveland.

The president moaned, going to warn his wife that the Council had changed, dramatically, so she didn't have a talk with anyone about the girls yet. If they were still bad, Laura could have a *talk* with them about it later as a proper mother should.

***

Senior Agent Maria Hill looked at the news then at the briefing sheets. "Oh, crap," she muttered, taking them to the director's office. "Nick."

He looked up. "Those look like what I spread earlier. What's wrong?"

"It's stupidly wrong," she said, handing it back then pulling up their files. "We have been partially watching." He read them over and groaned. They had files on the magical communities, but they were skimpy. They had files on the old Council and started one on the new version but it was skimpy too. They didn't have one on any invasion or any apocalypse battle, but they did have one on that army unit thanks to one of the investigative team being theirs. "Do you want to tell the president?"

"No." He looked at her. "Or the World Security Council."

"They may know something. Maybe not the newest version that just got formed from the ones that had been HYDRA tainted but the original ones may have."

The director blinked a few times. "Great." He handed them back. "Redo it for the president's briefing. He wants all agencies to conference tomorrow. I'm leaving at eight." She nodded, going to pull together what they knew about. It was a better report and she did send around a memo to their agents and staff about the conference and the things coming out, and if they had any additional information to please share it so they all knew.

***

Buffy was at this meeting with Giles. She smiled at him for pulling out her seat for her and sat, letting him sit on her left side so her right was able to use a hidden weapon if she had to fight her way out. It wouldn't be the first time. She looked around, realizing she was the only woman in the room outside one of the bodyguards for the president.

"So," she said, smiling at them. "I'm assuming you guys all saw the book that we told Willow to give to the reporter." They all nodded. "Great. So what's the DT today for then?"

"There seems to be some overlap," the president of the US told her. The MaCUSA president was on his left. They had to share duties here. "Miss Summers?" She smiled and nodded. "You're the senior girl right?" She nodded. "How many slayers do you have?"

"We keep that classified because there's people who're attacking us for it. In the US we have sixty-nine or seventy I think," she said, looking at Giles.

"Of appropriate age to be in training and patrol cleared, yes, we have seventy-two in the US and another ten in Europe, three in Africa, and seven in different parts of Asia. There's three native to the South American and Central American parts but they're out of the area for their own safety."

"Are some of the excess here in the US because they moved?" the head of the FBI asked.

"No, they're trainees," Buffy said. "We have nineteen patrol cleared and the US house in Cleveland rotates the girls in our other houses when they need a vacay or healing time."

"Okay, so you have the extras training." She did the so-so hand motion in the air. "They don't?"

"They do tell the girls about their areas and all that but many of them can't really do the training stuff. They do cultural stuff, help the girls moving to an overseas house pick what she's taking with her for clothes, because that's become a headache in a few areas, and all that stuff. A lot of them take in reports for Giles and talk to the houses that they like to go through. We're all very supportive of each other."

"That's good to know," he said with a smile for her. "What about that one young woman, Miss Rosenburg?"

"She's our head witch. What about her?"

"She nearly destroyed humanity?"

"She lost the girlfriend she had just gotten back together with right afterwards, right next to her. What would you do?" she asked.

"I don't have that sort of powers but I can see me grieving hard for that," he admitted. "She's better and back on reasonable footing?"

"If she can get away from her parents nagging her," she said dryly. "They're driving her to beer. The last time she really drank she had just broken up with her first boyfriend."

"Can we stop those parents?" Nick Fury asked.

"Irma and Sheila Rosenburg," Buffy said.

"The psychologists?" he demanded.

"Yup," Buffy said dryly. "She'd probably like it if her parents went back to ignoring she existed again. They have for years after trying to burn her at a stake with the other possessed parents. But that's old Sunnydale history."

"Usually I have an agent from an area that has a lot of problems," Nick Fury said. "I don't have one from Sunnydale."

"Well, most of the people in town never really wanted to move away," she said with a shrug. "The hellmouth made them want to stay to become snacks."

"First, let's start there," the MaCUSA president said. "I haven't heard that word. Hellmouth?"

"The portal thingy that radiates energy?" she suggested. "What drew the former Mayor to create Sunnydale to help with his ascension? The same thing that's in a park in Cleveland that draws vampy vamps there and lets the peaceful community hide in plain sight? And who're you, sir?"

"He's the head of the magical, non traditionally based magical, community," Giles told her. "Not like the covens but the other sort, Buffy."

"Oh. Hey." She smiled and waved. "Nice to meet you."

"An ascension? We've never heard of any such thing happening here, young lady."

Giles sighed but Buffy pulled out something and slid it down the table. "We brought films for show and tell. That's on there if someone can show it to the class. Willow said it should work and Andrew included a second version in another format."

The head of the FBI took it to run for them and put up the index. "Which, Miss Summers?"

"Graduation."

He ran that film, letting them all see it. And the being that came up. And the battle. And then the explosion. "Oh, fuck," he muttered.

Buffy grinned. "Not our best thing but all we had. The National Guard base in town didn't step up to help and a few of their people were there because they had kids in the band. The police actively tried to stop the parents from fleeing. So we did the best we could. For not having anyone battle trained we did a great job with that one. Took them two years to clean up the mess and start to rebuild the school too."

Giles nodded. "Unfortunately that was our former Mayor, who started Sunnydale to help him on his bid to do just that. He went for the largest version and it took him ninety years to accomplish. Him tainting the hellmouth to help him draw certain types of beings was what made Sunnydale so dangerous at times."

Buffy nodded. "I did good. We got it down under thirty percent and most years under twenty percent death and disappearance rate. So where were you guys?" she asked the magical president. "We didn't see a single one of you. Ever."

"I had no idea about any of that."

"And yet, it's a lot of magical stuff. We had a full coven there at one time I'm told."

He cleared his throat. "We don't even have myths of that, Miss Summers. We're fixing that now."

She grinned. "Great. Leave Willow alone? And my sister?"

"We do run some fine magical schools if one's young enough to attend."

"I have no idea and Dawn's seventeen." She shrugged, looking at Giles.

"They practice magic less instrinsically than we do," Giles told her. "We use our own power, they have a foci that's a wand or a stave to help them. That sort of focus could help Willow if she wanted to learn it as well but I don't believe Dawn would want to learn. She doesn't really use her magical skills."

"Good! I want Dawn to be as normal as possible, though she's still not allowed to date." She looked at the other agents. "We didn't see any of you there either. Why not?"

The head of the FBI winced. "I have no idea. Looking at their former statistics, we should have been there from the start."

"Willow wasn't sure if he did something so everyone ignored the stuff they have to report," she admitted.

"It's a possibility but we still should have seen that. What's the closest office to Sunnydale?"

"We're three hours from LA."

"I'm going to talk to them later." He made himself a note. "Which agency investigated the explosion?" She laughed, shaking her head. "At all?"

"No. The police decided it was a gas explosion within a few minutes. Told everyone and whatever kept them quiet and not thinking about it made them believe it." He winced but nodded. "We didn't see a single agent until we took down some Rangers doing bad things to demons." He and a few other slumped at that.

Nick Fury stared at her. "You sure they were Rangers?"

"The one I was dating and got talked into helping a tiny bit sure was. His whole team was. The other teams all wore the same patches so I'm guessing they were too. The ones that're still living are with the UN hunting squads or Homeland." That agency head winced at that.

"I dated Riley Finn and he talked me into a tiny bit of testing and things. They considered me mythical too." She grinned. "Then we found out what they were doing and down they went. Twice." She looked at Giles then at him. "How is Riley doing? I know he's married now."

"He got fired for tampering with a case," he said, looking that name up. "I have to investigate that whole unit." He made himself a note. "I'll tell them you said hello, Miss Summers."

She grinned. "If you want to freak them out, tell them Xander said hi. They all considered him useless and a tagalong but look what he handled."

"You had a male helping?"

"We had a whole team back then. In high school we had another guy, Willow's boyfriend, and a vampire with a soul curse. Later on we had another vampire that the Army put a control chip in so he couldn't feed. It let him get some chaos out and feed from the demonic remains instead.

"We had a few females who were in there with us too. Willow's former girlfriend. One of our friends from school that died on the LA team. The first vampire started that one and gathered a team there. Including one of our former watchers for a while until he died."

"A lot of you seem to die," the head of the Secret Service noted. "Is that a training issue?"

"No, that's a fighting a demon battle is mean to us issue," she said. "Vamps are stronger and faster than us. We still fight 'em. Even the normal ones. It took me years to see that though. I've been incredibly lucky with my helpers. The girls before me didn't get more than their watcher, who usually raised them. We stopped that by the way."

"Good," the US president said with a grin and a nod. "Now they're staying at home?"

"They are if they can. If they have one. The First took out a lot of families. So we have a specially guarded house for the orphans."

"What was that thing?" the head of the Magical community asked.

"The First Evil?" Giles pulled up that battle. "That was the one to seal her back in. That's inside the hellmouth. She's what blew up the old Council." They watched that one, most of the people wincing. Buffy grimaced at one spot. "I told her not to go in," she muttered. "She insisted!"

"Do we have many of that level?" the head of the Secret Service asked.

"No. She's our worst to date and hopefully the worst ever. Graduation, the LA invasion, and the one in Brazil rank behind her but they're nicer at least. We were in the open air and not trapped inside the portal that could trap us in there."

"First, is that what happened to Sunnydale?" President Bush asked. She nodded. She let that film go on. It was filmed from the same body camera but caught the end moments of Spike. "Oh, damn. Who was that?"

"Spike. The vampire the Army got that we worked with. He got sent back once to help Angel so he died permanently in the LA invasion with Angel."

"Why did he get sent back?" the MaCUSA president asked.

"The PTB said so." She shrugged. "We didn't ask, but they decided. We all hate the PTB and their visions and their plans because they suck at it. Worse than Willow does."

"They send visions?"

"With ideas on how to handle the battle they planned for us. But they included girls that never survived to this day and they want us to thin the herd again and all sorts of neat stuff we go around and solve anyway. They're really not fond of us but they're the ones who pick us. We all agree that if we find them we're punching them in the nose at the very least.

"Or if we can sneak weapons, we're blowing their shit up so they can't plan more world ending battles for poker games among the higher beings." She shrugged. "We handle it as we hear but we don't make the battles. We just do what we can."

"Are we talking like a God being?" one of the guards in the room asked.

She smiled at him. "No. We've met some ancient gods over the years. They all agreed the PTB are ethereal beings up floating around making bets and wanting balance. They also don't seem to realize that we have cars or artillery." She grinned. "That's solved a few that they've sent."

President Bush blinked a few times. "You've used artillery?"

"Yeah. A few times. Did you expect me to take on something with nine arms who was about the same as a three story building with a sword?"

"No," he admitted. "Was that in the US?"

"Brazil. One of theirs down there. The girls down there asked for help so Faith and I got a short vacay, a battle, and then some beach time to flirt."

"Buffy," Giles sighed.

"Sorry, but we did! We both needed the vacay and beach time."

Giles rolled his eyes. "All my young women and girls are most...exuberant about life things at times. We appreciate them being young women, especially happy young women. We work to keep them all as happy and healthy as possible."

"We could add them to a military unit," the head of the FBI suggested.

"Nope. I look sucky in a hat and I only salute Andrew when he gives me coffee after a long night slaying." She stared at him. "None of my girls are going to be conscripted or we'll leave the US to handle it on their own. My girls are not there to be risked for anything. Especially not politics.

"We have to protect *everyone* on this planet, not just the US. And we don't really trust the military after seeing some of their finest." He nodded once at that, looking away. "Besides, I doubt you guys want to deal with prophecies, visions, or magic. I doubt those other magical people have many among your military guys either."

"Not too many," that president agreed. "There's a few who claim to be Wicca followers though."

She nodded. "We like the covens for the most part. The Devon coven makes cookies sometimes. And they knit for the holidays for the girls."

"They do," Giles agreed, nodding a bit with a small smile. "They try to keep it as being fond aunts."

"Are there covens like that in the US?" Bush asked. Giles shrugged but Buffy nodded. "You don't work with them?"

"We don't know them," Buffy said. "None have shown up and us going to them to talk to them about stuff would probably freak them out. If they show up and talk to us we'll gladly talk back. We like having help most of the time. Now and then every slayer hates having help and we snap at our helpers. Which usually makes Xander go back to Africa and not talk to us for months on end."

"Your male helper?"

"He's the training watcher in Africa," Giles said.

"Leftover from the old line?" the MaCUSA president said happily.

"No. One from my team in high school," Buffy said. "I don't trust many of the old liners not to backslide to the old ways. And none of them even thought about going to train the girls at home in Africa or Asia. Thurston...."

"Thratching," Giles corrected. "He came in after that, had been a solo hunter. He's working with the girls in Asia, in the countries he can get to. He's one of three over there. We can't find more to help Xander but the countries do handle a good bit and he's got a few older slayers on hand."

"Thratching checks on Cho Ahn for us too," Buffy said with a grin for him. "She's nowhere to be found."

"Do they have her in hiding?" Giles asked her.

"I haven't had a slayer dream or feeling of her falling. None of us have gotten anything from her recently. No big injuries or her death; we'd all know. I haven't asked Xander to ask anyone yet. Or asked our poker circuit."

"Ask him." She pulled out her phone to do that, getting an answer back fairly fast. "Is she all right?"

"Xander heard she had been disappeared so he blew a poker debt. She's in Bermuda at the house down there that has no communications anymore for her own safety. She's injured but not badly." She put her phone back after sending a thank you. "He had her rescued by a demon contact," she told the others. "She was being beaten and they got her to an ER down there and to the hidden house we have for recuperation."

"Why doesn't it have communications?"

"Because the protections on it keep them from working," she said. He still looked confused. "Things would come for a slayer that's weaker. Injured, sick, whatever. I had one that tried to take me out because I had food poisoning. He's normally very peaceful but he took his shot because I was weakened. That house has an absolute protection on it so nothing can get to the girls recovering down there."

"I see." He nodded once at that. "That's actually a good thing to hear. We were rather worried that the girls weren't as protected as you seem to have them."

She smiled. "I'm all very supporty of my girls. I'm the last slayer called individually. I died but someone did CPR so we had two," she said at the opening mouth from Nick Fury. "I got drowned. Xander did CPR. For years he let me believe Angel had because I was stuck on him for so long." She shrugged. "First loves."

Nick Fury sighed but nodded. "What about weapons for your girls?"

"We've found a few guys who could make us good swords," she said. "We can find crossbows pretty easy these days, even though the older watchers like us to use the wooden stock ones because they can be used as a club or an emergency stake if we have to." She shrugged again.

"I hate guns. They're too easy to have used on us by it being taken from us. The girls all learn how to shoot because Xander got insistent. We like to pet artillery and we appreciate it saving some of us when we get to use it or need to use it. Sure helps the bigger problems but we can only get so much from the kitten poker circuit so we don't use it as often as we'd like to.

"If you guys want to jump into battles that's fine. Bring your own weapons, we never have spares, but sure, jump in!" She smiled at them. "Just don't hurt my girls. We've had agents stepping in during some bigger things. We had a few actors jump in during LA's thing with guns. Wasn't greatly helpful but they did manage to help clear some of the civilians caught there."

Nick Fury looked confused. "Why would they?"

"We had an invasion in downtown LA," she said dryly, putting up that video. "From Faith's bodycam mostly."

They watched and the MaCUSA president was muttering about the portal. "How did they do that?" he demanded.

Buffy paused the film. "They had a portal frame inside the building. Gunn had someone blow it up to end the portal." She turned it back on. They saw the explosion and the building going down thanks to it. "The portal sucked to do that," she told them. "It wasn't part of the bomb." She turned it off finally. "The rest is five hours of making sure all the little biting things were dead." She grinned. "Not bad for not asking Xander for battle plans and not recalling him and the foreign girls."

"Is Harris military of some kind?" Fury asked.

"Nope. He learned from a possession I guess." She shrugged. She realized she was doing a lot of that but she couldn't really do anything else that didn't make her look like she was a moron in front of these people.

"He learned from those role playing games and a possession one year helped with that skill set," Giles told him. "I was not trained in tactics or battles. Neither were most of the other watchers, even when we had the old Council." That got a wince. "We do have someone in the armory now who had been military. He married one of our girls and he does most of the battle plans for the main house now."

"Army?" Fury asked.

"Air Force. None of the girls will really get near anyone from the Army, and most are hesitant over the Marines as well. With their past actions, most of the girls will avoid all military personnel, especially overseas. The only ones that don't are in the house in Spain, who work with some, and the one in Australia, who have been forcefully adopted then locked them in a closet to make them be less annoying."

Giles smiled and took off his glasses. "They came to a treaty moment when Faith went to talk to that military unit. Now they're like big brothers to all that house's girls and any minis in the area. They evacuated them when all this came out before anyone down there came after the girls."

"They're safe but they said the safehouse is dingy. They've actually painted it on the guys and got scowled at but now it's nicely clean," Buffy added. Nick Fury looked so confused. "We are young women. How many of us would want to stay somewhere dusty, dirty, and nasty for weeks on end?"

"I guess that's a point," he admitted. "Are your girls taught anything like battle tactics or fighting formations?"

"No. We get some of that from the download. We pretty well jump in and handle it unless someone like Paul from the armory steps in to tell us how to jump in. We jump in, whack away with our swords or whatever, and then we win and have dinner. Then we go clubbing in trashy clothes to make ourselves feel better, Mr. Fury.

"We're women, not soldiers. We'll never be soldiers. And even if one or two might like that idea, it's not encouraged because it's a danger to them and others. Things come for slayers and slayers are a bit stronger, faster, and heal faster because of what we fight. We can't let that hurt them or others."

"We do have one who was military when the calling went out," Giles admitted, putting back on his glasses. "She's in Ottawa at the moment." He looked at him. "They had to move her to a special assignment because as soon as her calling was activated she drew the wrong attention and her whole base nearly died from the attack to get her. She won't be allowed to re-up her commission.

"She had no idea what was going on but thankfully the download helped her. She managed to save most of her base, and whoever from the other three attacks before they put her somewhere shielded and someone went looking for why. She found out and contacted us to see what had happened and why."

"She's kinda neat but she's a computer geek," Buffy said. "Does radar stuff. We talked and we trained her in how to defend herself, helped her meditate to the slayer spirit to learn from her, all that stuff. Now she's on special assignment in Ottawa. When she comes home, she can take over Willow's computer lab duties and make sure we're more up-to-date with tracking stuff."

"We may be able to lend you an agent to set that up," the head of the Secret Service offered.

Buffy stared at him. "The last time we had an agent in the building he tried to knock us all out so he could steal six little girls. What makes you think we'll trust you around my baby slayers?" He groaned. "He found out and tried to get them to experiment on. That's not the first time.

"We have a few because we rescued them from their parents doing the same thing and social workers agreed we could protect them better than them going into regular foster care. We have a house full of girls who're orphans and in foster care. There's a social worker who lives in the house to work with the girls and a few who look over her shoulder too. They just can't talk about it. We made sure they can't to protect the girls, with their permission."

"I can see that being a worry. I have agents who really don't like kids and who I know will not harm any of your girls for any reason, Miss Summers. Good people, including some female agents if that would be better."

"Can they handle working in a house that has sixty girls?" she asked. "Because with the underage girls in school and stuff, we're kinda full of squealing."

The president blinked. "So that earlier number...."

"Was our patrol cleared," she said. "Or in senior level training and on trainee patrol." She nodded a bit. "When the whole line got activated to handle that one with the First, it activated every single slayer down to those being carried. In the future, the girls will be activated automatically at fourteen then go into better training than just self defense stuff.

"They're only allowed self defense class until puberty then they get some identification classes, some bigger self defense classes to help them with man things, and when they're about sixteen they go into things that no little girl should see. That's when they learn about how bad some things were, the bigger threats, how to stake, all that stuff.

"They can go on trainee patrol when they're seventeen or when they ask. Some of our girls don't want to and we think that's fine. At least they know how to protect themselves and we do pay for college and stuff. We're all allowed to have a normal life, whatever one we can create, and if we want to patrol we learn how to patrol and if not we don't. Eventually we retire to battle only status or just plain old retire. Some of those may someday train some of the minis."

"You're very insistent that they have normal things," Bush said.

She nodded. "Because under the old Council they didn't get to have a life at all. Now we make sure they're like normal girls. Only we have the world's suckiest after school job. One that can mess with our homework and stuff." She shrugged a bit. "That's why I didn't finish college. Apocalypse season is always during finals in the spring.

"I make *sure* my girls get choices and get to make them for themselves. Before I died and got brought back, it was one girl fought, died, and another was called." A few shuddered. "The modern slayers are much more normal girls. Though I would like for them to be able to go back to school."

"I can see that," Nick Fury agreed. "We can probably drive off the reporters."

"And the teacher that wanted to dissect one of my girls to see what made her chosen?" she asked. "The DA there won't charge him because he said it but didn't act on it."

"What about a private school?" Bush asked.

She shrugged. "I haven't seen one that would work for the girls. Or would accept the girls. We're in Cleveland. If you know one, please let us know. We'll go talk to them. The girls need normal times again. And if they're seniors they need to know about prom soon."

"Your girls do their proms?" Nick Fury asked.

She nodded. "Isn't that what you do in high school? You go to classes, you have friends, you take the SAT or whatever it is on this coast, you go to the prom, you learn how to date and what you like in your dates, all that stuff. I did. My mom made sure." She smiled. "They missed me so I didn't get raised by them. She told the Council to blow her and I fired the old Council from my life when I was eighteen."

Giles nodded. "The girls that were Council raised in the past were not as socially aware as the current ones are. The old Council put a slayer and a watcher together somewhere and let them train her by himself. Many of them didn't get proper educations or normal childhood things."

"I met one. She had *one* shirt. I had to get her another few so she could change clothes. Her watcher sent her to Sunnydale by having her sneak onto a plane's wheel."

Nick Fury winced but nodded. "Good of you to change it."

"Hell yes, the first thing we did when we heard they had been blown up was make sure all the girls that made it to us in Sunnydale had the foundation of what they needed to survive this and then started them on education stuff. Before if a girl wasn't called she was just kicked out at eighteen without any future or skills." She shrugged. "Now, we don't do that. Though there's a few I'd like to kick, I won't kick them out and ignore they existed."

"How did the rest of us not see this?" the MaCUSA president asked.

She shook her head. "Did you come out of your little villages? I figure you guys are like those settlement villages the girl from Rhode Island told us her school took her to trips to."

He sighed. "We are rather isolated but we do go among normal humans."

"Then again, most normal humans would look at funny looking people and wonder what birth defect that was and feel sorry for them being that way," she said dryly. "It wasn't just Sunnydale that has a problem with ignoring things."

"No, it's not," Bush agreed. "Is one purple with green spots? Walks like a dog?"

She smiled. "That's what we like to call a snot puppy. It's harmless and loving. We like to pet them even if we do get a bit slimy sometimes. Their skin can leak snotty feeling stuff when it's happy. Andrew has a really good recipe to get that out of clothes thanks to my Mom's laundry skills."

"I thought I had seen one in town wandering around."

She nodded. "Most demons don't really keep pets but they are a pet species. They don't bite or anything. They're just there to be petted."

He nodded. "That's good. Do they have weird meat animals beyond kittens?"

"You mean like the big slug thingies they use for meat on some realms? Yeah." She nodded. "It doesn't taste *bad*. It's got a slightly bitter taste to it, but I didn't want to know what it was. We have a girl who came from swamp country down south. She fully agreed that sometimes you didn't want to know what was in the dish even though it was really great."

"I've seen some of that," he agreed with a smile and a nod. "Overseas too."

"Xander talked to the girls about scorpion gumbo. They were a bit horrified but that one really loved it. Said it was like poisonous, sandy crawdads or something." She winced. "I didn't want to know."

"Yeah, I know that feeling very well, Miss Summers." She grinned. "Do you have anything upcoming?"

"Beyond nightly patrol for newly vamps? Ummmm." She typed that out. "Andrew said that the girls in upper Europe are dealing with something some military lab came up with that's super wrong but it's nearly solved and the military there is solving it supposedly. Xander has one coming up in the western horn part of Africa. None of us know where he is most of the time though."

She looked up. "He's got militaries that were handling stuff so he jumps in while training the minis." She went back. "Panama has an upcoming contest to decide who leads a clan. Andrew said that might get a bit noisy and rowdy but the locals there won't get in their way if they turn it into a street brawl. So I'll send a girl to sip wine and watch over it then kick anyone who goes near a normal."

She tipped her head. "Amblin in Asia has three bigger problems but two are diplomatic and one's China complaining that their girl disappeared. He's negotiating with an ancient volcano spirit to go back to sleep. He should ask Xander how he did that." She typed that message.

Then she put her phone back up with a smile for the staring men. "So nothing huge. Most bigger battles are in the spring. We get some around All Saints thanks to humans sometimes or around Solstice/Christmas from some humans acting up. Otherwise it's mostly patrols right now."

"Ancient volcano spirit?" the MaCUSA president asked.

"Yeah. That's not that unusual. I had an ancient pagan god teaching us english lit at UC Sunnydale." She shrugged. "He told us that DeSade should've met Freud but otherwise he did okay explaining the things that annoyed me about Jane Austen."

"Are there other higher beings teaching?" the head of the Secret Service asked. He sounded very tired.

She smiled and nodded. "I know there's a few. There's one at Columbia and they're who Ghostbusters based Gozer on."

He sighed but nodded. "The ones at that one college, where are they now?"

She looked at Giles, who looked that up. "Our records have him at a small college in Ireland running their drama department. Which does work well for many ancient beings. They do know drama." He put that book back into his pocket. He smiled a bit. "We keep track of some of them but we had no idea that there's still some with temples outside the Western European areas or in the US. The former Council didn't really keep track outside of European style countries."

"Tamara said that she found a few hidden temples in Central America but wasn't sure if they were living in them," Buffy reminded him. "She was sure one was teaching in a local town."

"Good point." He patted her on the hand. "There's not many places they can live if they can't fit into the normal world these days."

"We have that same problem," the MaCUSA president said with a sigh at the end. "Our no-maj all prove that to us each year a new class comes in."

She nodded. "They have to go home to the normal world outside school stuff so they still have to live there. I'm guessing you guys kinda halted some things like the Amish do."

"Not quite that ancient of ways," he said with a smile. "Though some of our communities are nearly there. The ones in England are nearly Victorian." Giles shuddered. "Quite. We feel the same way about the older clothes."

"Wow, they'd really hate the fashion shows this year," Buffy quipped. "I couldn't live without fashionable stuff. My girls all learn how to be cute bait while still able to fight in stuff."

"I wish they'd wear better outfits for that," Giles told her. "Do take that pink skirt away from the girls, Buffy."

"I've tried. Faith snatched it last time and burned it."

"Thank you. It really doesn't look appropriate on most of you." She nodded. "The girls also learn how to act like bait even if they're more shrewd."

"Yeah, I may seem like the airhead cheerleader I used to be," Buffy said with a grin. "But I'm not. It gets us underestimated."

The others just nodded at that.

The MaCUSA president cleared his throat. "Miss Summers, is this one of yours? Some of our people in England would like to speak to him." He slid down a paper.

She grinned. "You know about Xander? What did he do? Did something bad flirt with him? They like him a lot even when he doesn't pay any attention to them."

"It seems he rather tripped and accidentally ended a major threat to the London magical community." She burst out giggling, nodding at that.

"That is rather Xander's luck," Giles admitted. "He apologized profusely for irritating England by tripping into someone and knocking them into a street, which got them hit by a speeding bus. They were important?"

"They were starting the next movement of pureblood pushiness." He took the paper back. "According to the report, some child was playing with their parent's wand and put some sort of leg locker curse on him, which made him stumble, run into Mr. Malfoy, and knocked him in front of one of our magical busses. Thereby ending a problem." Giles winced at that. "Does he often do that?"

"Things happen around Xander and we have no idea why," Buffy said with a grin. "But sometimes he has to handle things too. Was he really upset?"

"That he had caused the accident. He even apologized to their family. Who was not impressed and slightly evil by themselves. We were all amused when we found out why." He smiled. "Is that your person in Africa?" Giles nodded. "Interesting. Has he had incidences like that down there?"

"Not that he's reported. He's had some battles. He's moved all his slayers to safer locations in the last few weeks. He stopped a sorcerer making zombies by throwing up on their fire by accident." Buffy burst out giggling again. "Some rather bad street sausage he said. Then he realized it was a resurrection ritual and chewed the sorcerer a new one. One of the peaceful community nearby walked him off and promised they'd stop him making zombies for profit."

"That's charming of him." He smiled. "Is he naturally from there?"

"Sunnydale. He was born and raised there," Buffy quipped. "He carries a ton of hellmouth radiation but no one's sure why."

"He did have radiation sickness after the town fell in," Giles agreed. "We had to detox some of that for him." Bush moaned at that, slumping and shaking his head. "We have not found anyone in Cleveland that has that problem. We've checked to make sure."

"The world only needs one Xander," Buffy quipped, getting swatted for it. "Hey!"

"In the multiple universes, there's at least one realm where he's twins or even triplets," he reminded her. "They probably have fewer problems."

"Those poor worlds," she said then sighed and shook her head. "I like Xander like a brother but sometimes...." Giles swatted her again. "Sorry. Old habits." She ducked her head slightly.

Giles rolled his eyes. "They knew each other in high school." The guys in there all nodded.

"Hell, I have a frat brother who still calls me Stinky," President Bush said with a grin. "Old friends can be that way." He looked at her. "What do your girls need outside less attention on them, Miss Summers?"

"That would be great. If someone wants to fall into battles, that's fine. If someone wants to give Paul in the armory weapons for us, that'd be great too. We could use the kitten poker winnings for things like rescuing the girls from bad dates." That got a nod. "No one there scares them like Xander does. I sure can't."

"Men, especially male paternal figures, are often seen as more scary," the head of the CIA said. "Do your people gather intelligence?"

"We hear gossip about things during poker games. Mostly we hear if there's going to be an upcoming battle, who's making a huge move, all that stuff. We hear if there's something huge going on off-realm that may mean a lot of immigration going on. That can sometimes cause us problems with people who don't understand or want to make sure they have power down here."

She shrugged a bit. "We keep track of our stats on how many were caught coming up and how many we staked in the clubs, and which clubs they're in. We don't hear stuff that would probably help you. Xander might if he's hearing stuff to protect his girls. I know one of his first things was to move a girl who was near a place where they're having a civil war restart."

"Does he report that?"

"We have no interest in human problems unless they're going to cause our duty issues," Giles told him. "He knows that. Though he never really reports on anything so none of us can complain that they had another battle but a hell goddess stepped in to stop it by beating her ex-boyfriend."

Buffy looked at him. "Recently?"

"Last month," he sighed. "He stood her up on a date so they broke up. He came down looking for a new girlfriend so she showed up to have an argument. She ended up slapping him and stomping off and he went home to pout according to the report I got from the military there. Xander's was not very informative but did say that the battle had been stopped by an angry former lover. No note on whose."

"I mean, if it was one of his," she offered. "Most of his do things like deal arms."

"True." He patted her hand again. "Xander's lovers are often drawn to him and are often not exactly light sided beings," he explained. "Which has helped his duty down there immensely."

Nick Fury grimaced. "Wow."

"They help the girls so I don't mostly care what else they do," Buffy told him. "As long as they're not hurting my girls and Xander doesn't have to protect them, then all that flies right over my ponytail. I've got too much work to do planning for patrol that night."

He nodded. "I can see why. I might know some people who might like to meet your watcher." He looked at the others, who looked amused.

"Would someone like a genocidal leader be attracted to him?" Bush asked.

"No. Xander would probably work against that kind," Buffy said. "Lighter sided bad guys. I know one was an assassin. One sold arms. He took out a guy who was doing bio weapons by giving a poker debt his address and let him go have fun with his camp. The demon got to pay off a few other debts he owed that way too. No one was upset that one went down because Xander had cut his security system."

She sat up straighter and wiggled some. "They had a militia type group down there that he tricked into getting into a battle. The local government was too far away so he tricked them into coming for him. Only had to fight a few before the battle started and then they were amused so took out the militia people. Xander took their weapons to use on the ones coming over to eat people. I heard he sent their people a note about how nice it was they had helped that way."

Bush burst out laughing. "Yeah, that's real unique."

Giles sighed. "It wasn't *good* of him but it was expedient and did work. It spared the locals being overrun and harmed as well."

"You do what you gotta do when it's you and a sword or an axe against a lot of bad guys," Buffy agreed with a slight nod. "Or they're really big. Then you go change clothes, treat the injuries, and then sulk. Or at least I sulk." Giles patted her on the hand again. She looked at the index list and chose one to show them. "That battle I think."

They all watched what happened and how that guy had handled it. The head of the CIA squeaked at one thing then bit his lip so he wouldn't comment on that other group. No, he did not want to know how that had happened. Ever. Though his people hated that group of militants. "May I have copies of those, Mr. Giles? For my own people to look up and find any other ones that may have been taped. We can use it for training our new recruits in how to handle a battle they run into."

"I do not mind. I didn't bring anything too outrageous or too upsetting. Though I'm aware there have been a few. One Xander's whole report stated it was bad, he was getting drunk for a week, and if the world died, great. That was the whole report. I didn't want to ask."

"Willow did," Buffy said, looking at him. "He got called to help take something out of a school." Giles winced. "A few hours after they found it. They had tried and failed to get it."

"No wonder he drank for a week," he muttered.

"He did handle a battle while drunk too. Someone tried something really stupid while he was drinking in the middle of nowhere so he handled it with his axe. He admitted it when Willow scried that situation to find out why it was so bad." Giles looked up and sighed. She texted Willow, who emailed her that film she had taped off the scrying portal. She ran it for them.

They got to watch the drunk guy smack the newly appearing demon with his axe to knock him out then toss him back over before huffing and going back to drinking. When the being showed back up Xander shot it this time and let it lay there until the portal closed around it and cut it in half. "He probably buried it when he had sobered up."

"I have some agents I consider screwy," Fury said. "I think your guy would fit in really well with them."

"He might like a better paycheck but the girls would pout about him leaving them," Buffy told him. "Please don't. He's the only guy sort near most of the girls outside of Andrew and they look to them for how to deal with guys. Even if they do nag him and pick on them and discount Xander horribly because I have."

"No, I don't want to hire him. That sort of duty's important," Fury assured her. She grinned at that. "How old are you two anyway?"

"That was our graduation in '99," she quipped.

He counted backwards from the current year of 2007 then sighed. "You're all really young." He looked at Giles. "Are most of your people field trained?"

"No. Most of the ones who survived were research watchers," he admitted. "We've been hiring more but we don't really want to add in too many agents and not hardly any military people unless they can prove they won't try to harm the girls. We had hired one agent and he tried to gather testing information on the girls for his people. We do have to worry about such things."

(scene continues in next part)
Part 2 by Voracity2
(scene continued from last part)



"Can the slayer things be found by bloodwork?" Fury asked. Buffy shook her head. "At all?" She shook her head again, staring at him. He could see the scary hunter in her eyes now. "Then why would they want it?"

"Because they can't believe in mystical pointy sticks of destiny," she said dryly. "The same as none of you wanted to think about that either."

"Point," the head of the CIA said. "What if we end up with someone who is gifted as a slayer in our service?"

Buffy stared at him. "Taking out humans breaks the slayer spirit in many bad ways. Faith ended up in jail thanks to that." He slumped. "We're meant to fight demons and let human things be handled by people like you and Mr. Fury down there."

That got a nod, and a few notes made. "We have a test to tell slayers. It's a little drop on the hand that changes color and makes your hand itch. A lot of us who could got our moles removed for being ugly. The plastic surgeon guy did mine in the office in under two minutes and I have a tiny little scar."

"I can see why they would," he agreed. "Are you putting out information on how to find out if you're a future slayer?"

"We scried them all and marked them on a magical map so we can keep track of them. We've alerted all ours that this is going on so they're cautious in case something goes on around them. We do the yearly scrying right now to find any newly born ones. We feel it if one of us dies."

"I had no idea about that. Some sort of sense?"

"An intense stomach cramp with the knowledge of who it was," she admitted. "Or from slayer dreams we see it happening if we're asleep. I unfortunately saw each and every one the First took out due to slayer dreams. Those can be prophetic or informational but they all suck. I need more sleep, not less."

"You can rest on the way home, Buffy. You know I won't let you drive."

She nodded with a sigh. "I tend to aim for the demons on the sidewalks instead of staying on the road. It's a common problem." She shrugged.

"No one's mentioned the middle east," President Bush noted suddenly.

"I imagine we're not the only ones who have to avoid that area for our own health," Buffy said with a wave at the MaCUSA guy.

"No, we have a community there and a very strong international school in the capitol of Saudi Arabia."

"Really? They tried to put us to death so we moved all the girls out of the region," Buffy told him. "Maybe it's because we're girls."

"That may be," he admitted. "Are there slayers born to there?"

"We think they're going to have a few problems in a decade or so because we had three born in the region about ten years ago," Buffy said. "Usually if we're born near an area that means some of us are going to have problems. Three girls were born in Brazil and are teens. Their hellmouth started to act up when Sunnydale went down. Two of the other girls who aren't very old were born near LA and Sunnydale. So they probably would've been closer in case something happened there."

"Any others get that mass birth?" the head of the CIA asked.

"Yeah, there's four Russian slayers, all from the more northern parts. Katya's a fantastic slayer. She's nearly an adult." She looked at Giles. "Do they have one?"

"Oh, yes, I forgot." He handed over a hand written list. "The current hellmouths and places that look weak enough to form one so people can pay attention to those areas. Chaos sorcerers could rip open one of the non-started, which would create a problem as it couldn't be closed again. The rest radiate slightly and can bring problems but not as many."

They looked over the list. "I've had ops in six of those," Fury said dryly. "That explains a lot."

Buffy sent a text and got a full file. "This is our working map of problem areas. Including hell gates, temples, immigration areas." She put it up for them. They all moaned. "That not-quite-a-hellmouth area in lower Turkey is probably why those girls were born near there. I'm guessing it's able to be opened easily."

"Hellmouths form when the barriers between the realms is thin," Giles reminded her. "So it's possible there's some expansion in those areas."

"Like a stretch mark," she agreed with a smile and a nod. "So that one will probably go from a minor stretchy spot to a full on mark. Katya was born near the one in Russia. The other girls are from about a hundred miles away but in all directions."

Bush looked at the MaCUSA guy, who shook his head slowly. "We don't have many things near any of those outside the one in England, which is near a community."

"And the Devon coven," Giles said. "They watch over that ancient, not very open spot."

"I wonder if they know each other. Can we copy that, Miss Summers?"

She smiled. "Sure! Save me some work!" They nodded and made copies of everything for themselves. During that her phone beeped a new message. She took it to look at. "Oh, boyfriend." She answered she was on a roadtrip and wouldn't be back until tomorrow, could they go to dinner then? He agreed so she let them have her phone again. "Willow has the contacts locked down so you can't get those." That got a nod from everyone. She looked at Giles. "He's taking me to dinner tomorrow night."

"That's fine, Buffy. Dating is good for you. Are you going to finally tell him about your duty?"

"Not sure," she admitted. "Maybe." She shrugged. "Though he'll probably break up with me for it. It's hard to date a warrior with a duty."

"It is." He patted her on the arm. "You'll find someone someday."

"Then the PTB will have me dying within a week," she said dryly. "They'd like that."

"Yes but we wouldn't. The same as Xander wouldn't."

"Point. They'd get him the minute he finds his. They'll lock eyes or whatever and he'll have a heart attack because they hate him more."

"Possibly true but don't give them ideas."

"Yeah, I'd hate that. He'd come back to haunt me. Or I'd end up having a kid and it'd be him reborn or something." He swatted her harder this time. "Sorry. Probably not the time for that." She grinned at the head of the CIA. "Xander's about fourth in command right now too. There's two hidebound assholes between him and Giles." He cleared his throat. "There are."

"I realize he would not be happy with them and would probably remove them somehow if he had to protect the girls from their ideas," he said dryly. "So do they, Buffy. And behind them is Willow." She shuddered but nodded.

"Someone once said my Dad had Dan Quayle because no one would assassinate him to make Dan president," Bush said dryly. Then he smiled at Giles, who smiled back. Buffy just nodded at that idea. "All right, what can we do right now?"

"Go guard the girls in Cleveland so they can get back to school," Nick Fury said. "I have some people who can use swords and I can lend them to help guard the girls and maybe up some of their training, plus figure out what other agents need to learn to jump in. Would that be all right, Mr. Giles?"

"As long as they wouldn't harm the girls in any manner or keep them from being girls. We could always use a temporary trainer."

"Two of them are the sort that if they asked I'd let them go to your people instead. They're uptight about what they think their duty is but I trust them not to be stupid."

"That's fine then," Buffy agreed. "If they annoy us too much, we have closets to lock them in. We have a few others in the past." She looked at the head of the CIA. "I think one was yours."

"I think one may have been ours at one point in time," he agreed. "Sorry about him. His new people apparently sent him." He looked at the head of Homeland, who was sighing and shaking his head. Buffy just smiled at him too.

"Would you like those ones that were given to my people back?" the head of the Homeland Security asked.

"No, we're not supposed to be taking out humans," Buffy said. "You have fun with them."

"I can gladly do that, Miss Summers." He nodded at Giles. "Mr. Giles, you'll let us know about future battles? Even in other places?"

"If I hear beforehand I can do that."

"You'd probably get it faster afterwards if you get the demon news channels," Buffy said. "We often do and then ask them if they have a report on what happened. That's about the only reason Xander sends in reports some months."

"There are?" a few of the men asked.

She nodded. "We have to tune ours specially to get them but yup. There's also a witches' home shopping network thing for slimy parts they may need. Like HSN for witch things. Willow got a pretty crystal one night when she couldn't sleep and a new cauldron."

The head of the magical US communities gave her an odd look. "There is?"

"Yeah." She got up to fiddle with the tv in there, getting instructions from Willow, who was apparently scrying now. She found that one at least. "That's the Witches' lifetime network. They do all the lifetime movie shows and movies for witches." She wrote down the instructions Willow gave her and then fiddled again. "Hmm. Demon news but very much like FOX news. We don't like them. They think we're bimbos. I can't get the other ones."

"We have a few other tv's we can retune," one of the room guards offered, taking the notes to call in. "We have one older tv that has a tuner system thanks to the satellite, they can find them all, sir," he reported a minute later. "That other news people are very not pleasant. Makes O'Reilly look nice."

"Charming of them." He watched the current news program going on. They weren't decent about how they covered this meeting but they were covering it from outside. "Anyone able to spot their people?"

The room guard called that in. "No, sir. That spot is showing nothing."

"So a clouding spell," Giles said. "Put on sunglasses, the tinted with yellow kind usually work best." He called that in and suddenly they found them. He smiled. "Clouding spells are light bending."

"Great to know. We can add that to our usual gear," the guard decided, moving back against a wall.

"There's other ways of being invisible," Buffy said with a point. "Like the guy against that wall. I figure he's the magical guy's guard." That one appeared with a nod. She grinned. "I could hear you breathing."

"That can happen, Slayer Summers." She grinned again. The MaCUSA president looked at him. "Aurors, sir."

"That's reasonable I suppose." He looked at her. "How many others can you find?"

"There's at least two scrying spells," Giles said with a point at each. "And one other being in here who may or may not be human." Buffy pointed at him. "Yes, that one. I sent out a magical sense when I walked in to find any additional ones. One of the scrying ones started recently so I'm supposing that's Willow's doing. It does rather feel like her and the coven head.

"The other, I can't identify by signature." On the news, someone was reporting that they had been found and their scrying as well so they shut it down. "Willow, it's fine, dear. Do quit now. Thank you." That one stopped as well. "She was probably worried after someone tried to gather the girls last night." He looked at the head of the FBI. Who shook his head. "They were carrying your badges."

"I have not heard a thing and I did not order that. If they're mine they're fired. I'll make sure of that when I get back. Did the Cleveland PD arrest them?" Buffy nodded. "I will be stopping that problem immediately."

"They could be the super religious cranks like have been shouting about us for weeks now," she reminded him. "Even the Pope had a 'we'd rather not think that God had to make female warriors' that meant we had to move some girls thanks to some priests."

"We heard," Bush said. "This has really thrown a wrench in how we see things. I'm sure you understand how jarring that is." She nodded. "I wonder if he's heard about the magical community."

"Probably from my kind of magic user," Giles said with a slight smirk. "As they used to force them to work for them hunting out others. Many of us can open up the catacombs down there to show the diaries that they used to keep."

"He'll probably hate that but it might be handy." He looked at the MaCUSA president, who was shaking his head. "None of yours?"

"Hadn't actually heard of that problem. But I'm not a historian so I can ask one of our universities."

"Do you guys have full colleges or is it like the Watcher program in Oxford's colleges?" Buffy asked.

"Mostly the second style. We do actually have a program in Oxford itself. The Council does?"

"And has since about Oxford's third year," he agreed. "We did help build that as well. Nary is ours."

The man moaned. "Oh, dear. We thought that was a fraternity."

"In many ways," Giles agreed smugly. "With lessons that enhance our chosen fields. My own of museum studies and history was wonderfully enhanced. Is Peter Edmonds one of yours? I always thought him a bit odd but could never figure out if he knew about magic or not when we worked beside each other at the British Natural History museum."

"I haven't been there but I can ask. It sounds like something one of us would do." He made himself a note of that name to look into. "Would any of your teachings enhance our own?"

"The history track may. We have true histories back to the beginning of humanity that were overthrowing the former demonic courts. That's why and when the slayer was created. It was passed down until writing and then we have three different ancient accounts in some of the earliest writings stored in a safe that I'm sure didn't get blown up with the rest."

"Could their people go excavate the old building to find our books?" Buffy asked. "I know Xander tried and had to give it up because the ghosts there hated him."

"He banished most of them but they still tried to keep him from grabbing the books so we could use them now. The old biddies in the library were like that however."

"We have ways of banishing the ghosts," the MaCUSA president said happily. "We can probably figure out how to do that together. I'll have to ask Gringotts if we can borrow a few cursebreakers."

"That could be of great help to us. We haven't been able to get nearly anything out of there. Including the stored artifacts. Some of which hold trapped beings." The MaCUSA president winced at that. "We've been trying."

"I'll ask them and call you tonight, Mr. Giles. That would probably be safer if moved. And I'm sure you'd need the library."

"It had enough books for all of Cambridge's libraries but yes, we could. There were some fairly important books with prophecies in them that we need to make sure of. I know a few have been invalidated because of Xander but we still must check and make notes on such."

"He was so proud that him giving someone a cold took out a prophesied invasion," Buffy sighed, shaking her head. "He does the wacky that way," she told the others, who smiled at that. "He dated one succuba, not realizing what she was, and it led to her overthrowing her bosses to remake the system for them.

"She couldn't even feed off him and she still did it so she could get him back." Giles smacked her on the back of the head, hard. "Sorry. Probably not the time for that either. You guys will get to know Xander later I'm sure." Giles scowled at her. "If you're going to get into the building it's him or it's Scravner."

"True. Perhaps." She rolled her eyes. He looked at the others, who were grinning at him. "I'm fairly certain each of you have a person like Xander in your agencies."

"I have a lot of them," Nick Fury admitted. "They drive me nuts but I can count on them to do what they think is right."

"Exactly," Giles agreed with a nod.

"That explains a lot," another said. "I know some of Director Fury's people like that."

Buffy grinned when he looked at her. "No, I know what I need to do. That's why I'm a slayer." He nodded at that. She looked at the two presidents. "Do they hold special elections for the magical community? Or do they vote in both?"

"They vote in both, but we have our own Congress and president," the MaCUSA president said happily. Bush rolled his eyes. "Almost no one realizes there's actually two governments."

"That's great. Is that how some of those conspiracy sorts that talk about the illuminati and the dark spaces get it?"

"Probably. I don't usually pay too much attention to those sort. They do give one a headache."

"We have Andrew for that. He used to want to take over the world with his geek buddies." The head of the CIA moaned. She grinned. "He's reformed and our housemom now. Now we only see robots at battles and sometime if we have really gross laundry so he doesn't have to touch them. Or the trash dissolving ray that he uses on those clothes."

The head of the CIA moaned. "Oh, dear."

She grinned. "We got warned Warren and Jonathan's ideas may have made it out of Sunnydale. Andrew would probably be proud of his former friends if they did."

"I...I know someone who'd like to talk to him about that."

"Sure! I'll have Willow make sure he's not making more nanites to stop the girls from picking on geeks again. We had to make him stop that earlier this week because a few were turning into mean cheerleader sorts." She got smacked again, harder this time. "Hey!"

"Andrew would not normally do that. He was lacking sleep and felt sorry for the young geeks he was protecting." The head of the CIA smiled at that and nodded. "Usually he's very courteous these days. He's one that Xander can talk to about comic books because the rest of us do not understand."

"I have a few like that myself," the head of the CIA agreed.

"Me too," Nick Fury said. "Two of them are in the group I'm sending you anyway." He put down two names and underlined them.

"Can one of those agents sneak me and two of the younger girls to a mall?" Buffy asked. "They're about to need their special girl shopping trip and I do those because Faith's not comfy with getting the girls their first bras."

"They can probably do that too," Fury agreed with a nod. "I have a few female agents who could handle that." She grinned at that.

Giles smiled at him for that courtesy. Then he looked at Buffy. "Take Belinda with you as well please. I'm tired of ignoring her bouncing out of her clothes."

"I am too but she insists she doesn't have to wear those sort of bras. I've tried!"

"I'll have a talk with the dear myself then. She really must have something before she harms herself some night."

"Too late." She looked at Director Fury. "How many are you sending us so I can warn the girls not to treat them like they're pets?"

"I'm thinking four to five. One female agent among them." She grinned. "I doubt they'd let you treat them like pets."

"We have a few little kids in the house, Director Fury. One's a slayer's daughter. She'll walk up to me, call me a puppy, and push me to sit down so she can pet my hair for me. Beyond that, I doubt they'd want to hurt the girls who were trying to pounce them to see if they were okay or not. That would immediately get them locked in a closet."

"Point. We'll see how that works out, Summers."

"Thank you." She looked at Giles. "Can we get a snack on the way to the airport?"

"Yes, Buffy," he sighed. "I know it's been hours and you need to eat to keep up your metabolism." She nodded.

"They have a higher metabolism?" the head of the CIA asked.

"I eat about six, seven thousand calories a day to keep from losing any weight," she admitted. "Though I do try to set a good example by getting healthy snacks."

"Wow."

Fury nodded. "I've seen some that have hyper skills that do the same thing." She nodded at that. "I'll warn those agents so they don't stare."

"Warn them the Chinese buffet won't let us in anymore. We kinda had the kiddy group there and the four-year-olds cleaned it out." She ducked her head, grinning some. "They had been playing in the park before then."

He nodded. "I can do that too. You have to replace the energy you've burned." She smiled at Giles.

"Let's stop this meeting here and come back to it in a few weeks," Bush said. "That way we can all make the changes we need to make and make sure the girls are safe for now." They nodded, going to do that. Both presidents went to hide and moan in their offices because bouncy, nice girls were saving their butts.

Nick Fury made it back to his office and ran into his assistant, who was waiting on him. He handed over the notes. "She plays airhead so very well. We're sending her those five. We've agreed if the agents are assholes they can be shoved in a closet. Warn them that the younger girls will try to treat them like pets to test how big of assholes they are."

She nodded once, looking at the notes. He handed over his copy of those files. "From theirs that they shared." She smiled at that. "Their guy in Africa is alone, bouncy, drawn to bad boy lovers like assassins and arms dealers, took down a bioweapons person, and is the same age as Summers."

"We can look at him and have been since we heard him mentioned. There's some impressive work he's helped handle."

"One of those films was his first planned battle at their graduation." She went to run it and then backed away from the screen by two steps at the demon coming out. "Exactly. The locals were all dirty and said it was a gas explosion. No one came to investigate it."

She looked at him. "How?"

"Magic bullshit."

"Oh, that reason." She ran the other films. "Is that...Al Shabab's subsidiary?" she demanded.

"Summers said he wrote a note praising them for helping defeat that so their higher ups were pleased with them." He smirked at her. "He's like one of ours only more wacky it seems. He doesn't have the training to back it up."

"Fuck that, he's all but one of ours except we don't pay him. Him and Barton could be siblings, sir."

"Don't even tempt someone," he ordered, going to his office to take something for his headache and stomachache. She ran the rest of them then called a staff meeting to show those ones going and others who had to know what was going on. One hated that idea and tried to counter idea that they'd gather the girls themselves but she found herself a pet within a few minutes thanks to a magic user who was not there.

Agent Hill looked at the new cat. "Interesting. Thank you, Miss Rosenburg," she called, looking up and waving with a smile. The heavy feeling in the room left. She smirked at the ones going. "Be safe around the girls and be careful with them. Fury's notes said that you're sneaking some of them out to a mall for a first girl's shopping trip for bras."

"I can do that," she agreed. "It's an important thing to have." They went back to the films. She sighed. "Is that common?" she asked after the graduation one.

"No clue. Find out and tell us all."

"I will," she agreed, looking at the other agents then at her. "Modern weapons?" She showed her one of the ones from Africa. "Interesting. Huh." She grimaced. "Is he a Barton?"

"Not that we're aware of and Director Fury said not to tempt someone."

"Granted," she decided. "I'll tell him so he can liaison with that one as well. It's best to let them find out who they can trust among us." She went to go pack. The others followed her. The former section head was still meowing pitifully and had dirtied the carpet. Cat guts were shorter than human ones apparently. She took her up there to hand to the director so he could ask for Victoria Hand to be changed back from a cat.

***

Xander looked at the guy strolling his way right after a battle. "If you're one of those reporters that tried to discredit me last week, blow me. If you're an agent here to complain, especially about girls saving you, blow me squared and buy me a beer between 'em."

The agent grinned and shook his head. "Not even close, Harris. SHIELD sent me to liaison with you over all the stuff down here so we can watch your girls' backs."

Xander grimaced, looking at the nearby soldiers. One said something and a few laughed. Xander looked at him again. "Did you wait until after the battle on purpose?"

"Only got here ten minutes ago. The road's torn up thanks to the helicopter fire. Otherwise I would've jumped in. I can use a short sword." Xander smirked at that. "I know, not actually practical at that length but at least I know some."

"That's about all I claim most of the time too," Xander admitted, finishing the bandaging job he was doing on one of the soldier's leg then stood up. "Their medical people are back about a mile."

"They followed us in." He waved. "Medics," he called. They rushed over. He looked at the battlefield then at Xander. "They all dead? I hear groaning."

Xander looked then grimaced. "Probably not. They'll burn the field clean in a few to make sure there's no other dimensional germs. Really, this shouldn't have been a battle but the people on that side dosed their maximum security prison with stupid shit and then sent them here to give them mercy and early release," he said bitterly.

"Oh, fuck. They warn us?"

"Poker circuit heard. Thankfully. I was in Borneo last night." He huffed, glaring at the area. He looked at the staring generals. "So?"

"If they survive that and are not harmful once they're sober, we don't care unless they start problems," one decided. "We called a demon healer to come in." He pushed his hat back. "Why is SHIELD interested in this battle?"

"We just found out about the slayers too," the agent quipped with a grin. "And are kinda horrified that we didn't know about battles to jump in and help 'em. That's my job and I should be standing in the same battle instead of them letting some underage girl volunteer. If they're adults then that's their choice," he told Xander. Who nodded.

"That's my statement usually too," he agreed. "Which is why they can't even learn the depths of the bad things until they're sixteen, can't even ask to go on a trainee patrol until seventeen, and can't be put on any sort of rotation until at least eighteen, but if we have an apocalypse battle the better trained seventeen-year-olds can volunteer to be in the very back of the line. We don't have that many."

"SHIELD has thousands of agents. We can take their place."

"If you want. We let anyone show up to help with battles, dude. Even if they're bigots who hate us. As long as they leave without harming the girls afterwards, jump in. Please," he said dryly, staring at him.

The agent grinned. "Good! I like that idea." He punched him on the arm. A stooped demon limped over. "Ma'am, want help?"

"I'm fine, human."

"Healer Elmira," Xander said with a deep bow. "They drugged a prison and this is how they gave them early release. We tried not to kill everyone. I'm sorry you had to see them do this."

She looked at him. "I saw the last two. Those, they all died. At least some are still living."

"As long as they stay part of the peaceful community here, we do not care about over there. They may have funny laws we don't." The general bowed to her. "Can we turn them over to you?"

"You may. My staff is coming with some other healers."

"Need my help or my energy stores?" Xander offered. She blinked at him. "It fucking sucks that they did this," he said in her native language, making her grin and nod. "If you need my energy, I can donate. Not like I won't have more and I could use a nap anyway." He looked out there then at her. "I can help if you want me to or need me to."

"No, Hunter."

"Watcher," he corrected. He grinned. "You know I'm the training watcher down here."

She hummed. "It's good you can put up with bouncy future warrior women." She pinched him on the cheek. "We should not need it." She walked past him but he helped her out there. The soldiers still walking helped her gather the living.

The agent came out to help with his backup team. It was respectful and he hated this stuff too. "Let us help, ma'am." She blinked at him. "I'm a SHIELD agent sent to learn from Harris so we can help the slayers when they have battles."

She hummed again. "Interesting." She looked at him. "Why do I sense snakes about you?"

Xander looked at him. "HYDRA? Really?" he quipped with a grin. "Are you here because I brought down that one base with the bioweapons program?"

"That was you?"

"Yeah. They wanted my blood and I said no. Very hard." He grinned his best boyish grin.

The agent nodded. "We didn't like that arm anyway and plenty of us who joined both had to so we were protected. Be damned if I want the world to fall to this either, kid." Xander stared at him. "I don't want to hurt any of the girls. Take their place in the future but not hurt 'em."

"Good. I'd hate to have to add your blood to this field." The agent nodded at that. "Hey, Healer Emmy. Let me help. We ripped up the ground out here." He helped a younger stooped demon over the torn up ground to a group of groaning demons. "You can take of my energy if you need to," he assured her.

She smiled. "You are a walking hellmouth, Xander. Go sit. You feel tired."

"I was in Borneo last night." He did go to help the healers to the field then sat down like the obedient guy he pretended to be.

The agent got his team to help them carry victims back to their transport trucks. They'd have to work on that guy until he respected them at least. Or prove how badass they were. Something.

Xander looked up as something appeared, walking over to hug him. "Hey." He looked up at the seven-foot-eight-inch God. "What's up, Nort?"

"What happened here, Xander?" He patted him but let him go.

"They decided to mercifully give their prison an early release by drugging them and sending them here." Xander grimaced. "We tried not to kill them because I thought the healers might be nearby. Thankfully the Generals agreed with that."

Nort the Demon God nodded at that. "That's good." He patted Xander on the head. "What if the healers had not been here?"

"I have that beam thingy," he said quietly. "It would've been merciful."

Nort nodded. "I like that." He grinned at the generals. "Xander is ever like some of my soldiers."

"Are you a war god?" a general asked. The other two just stared.

"No." He smiled. "I'm a healing god, General. I just have a lot of battlefield healers under me on my native realm." He looked down at Xander. "You do good with that."

"I took extra lessons just in case it was needed. I didn't get everything out of Willow's mom's textbooks." He heard something crunch and looked back. "Healer Emmy!" He rushed out to help her up. "Are you very injured?"

"I will survive for a bit longer, Xander. Let go."

He picked her up and took her to the truck, staring at her once he had her on a seat. "Take my energy to heal yourself," he ordered. "I won't ever risk a healer unless it's necessary and this isn't. So take mine. I've got plenty." He took off a necklace, which made him put out a slight glow. She didn't move so he cut his hand and put it onto her bare arm skin, making her shiver as her body automatically sucked from him to heal herself.

She moaned as her leg reset. By the time he let her arm go she was fully healed and looked years younger. He bowed to her. "I won't risk a healer. You're too damn important to the community," he said quietly. "You know that."

"You're pushy."

He grinned. "You give me some of the sweetest compliments, Healer Emmy." He blew a kiss, going to do that to Healer Elmira. Who swatted at him but he did it anyway. It healed all the damage the healing had done to her. Xander was exhausted but yawning when she was as better as he could make her. "Ask me to donate if you need it. As long as there's not an immediate battle, I'm good with that. You know that.

"Healers are too precious to risk." She swatted him. He blew a kiss. "I'm going to tell the minis you need fussed at. I'll teach them how to make cookies too." She moaned but did get back to work. He went back to Nort, who was smirking at him. "I don't want a single healer harmed. Healing is a special gift and they're important."

"They are. Even if those two are now hellmouth tainted."

"They can filter that into the healing." He smirked. "Don't make me let the minis fuss over you too."

"They have been. Can you please remove Minnie from my temple?"

Xander laughed. "Nope!" He smiled. "The healers helped her and she's showing gratitude. She'd do it to human doctors too."

"Damn. Fine, I'll let the healers in residence train her." He disappeared.

Xander put that necklace back on with a shrug for the staring generals. "The minis love to fuss at important beings who help others. They all learn to respect the peaceful community."

"It's good of them," one agreed in his native language. He went to help the healers as well.

Xander grinned at the other two. "Let me go nap?"

"Please. You're bouncy," the one who could speak english agreed happily.

"Need me, ladies?" he called.

"Go rest before you hyper us all into youth," Healer Emmy ordered.

"Yes, ma'am." He went to take the truck with the first load of demons back to the healer's clinic to drop it off. His truck would follow. He had spells on it for that. "Here, from Healers Emmy and Elmira." The guards nodded, getting them inside to be put into beds. "They probably have another hundred more," he warned. "They have the other truck."

"I can drive this one back, Watcher. Go rest." He nodded, going to do that at the local hotel. The guard drove the truck back and drove the second truck in for them then back to the battle area.

The agent walked over to the generals. "Is he always like that?"

"He's tired so bouncy. He can be worse than the girls sometimes. Though..." He looked at the others. "We were warned not to let him have caffeine before a battle. We learned why."

"We at SHIELD would love to find more of the battle videos for training," he offered with a smile. "We gotta get used to how they do things to back them up."

"The girls are always girls. They complain about the nastiness during the battle. They complain about being sweaty even as they fight." The agent nodded at that. "Slayer Buffy will shout 'eewwww' when something gets on her jeans. She's showed up for a few battles to help." He smirked.

"They are warriors, not soldiers, but they are girls always. And a few of them raised Harris so he's sometimes a girl and sometimes just bouncy." He said something to the other two, who shrugged and called in but nodded. "And we can share our training tapes he gave us."

"Thank you." He shook his hand. "Let us finish helping the healers." He went to report that to the others while they worked.

***

That night, Xander got woken up by a 'no fucking way that worked' loudly from downstairs of his room. He blinked and stared at the floor. Then sighed and let himself go back to sleep. He had a super bouncy young mini to start working with again in the morning.

"Oh my God, she's in a skirt and heels!" that same voice complained. "And kicking things!"

Xander snorted. "Oh, that video. Yeah. There's worse out there." He drifted off again.

Downstairs, the agents were having fits about how the girls did things. Skirts and heels? Cute quips? In a battle! The higher ups were going to have to swear and drink.

***

Maria Hill got the download notification and stared. "Nick, we have some of the battle videos," she called. She called in a few others to come watch them. She put up the email first while she downloaded the first video. The senior agents all moaned at that warning that the girls were weird. She put up the video and settled in to watch it.

She had to blink a few times. "I would not be fighting in a tight t-shirt that bared my stomach. Is she in a comic book?" The other senior agents just stared oddly. Though one was ordering dinner to be delivered with a few drinks. Hill looked over then tossed over some cash for her part. Fury did the same thing.

Nick Fury watched the most unusual thing ever and realized that the world was screwed. "The blonde is Summers. The brunette in leather is Lehane," he noted. "The other slayers aren't identified openly." Hill nodded once. Then the battle got worse and the girls complained but they handled it. He sighed. "Is that the worst?"

"They sent them in the order to watch," she said. She turned on the last one on the list. "Palate cleanser two it's marked." It was a simple field battle. Something opened a portal and ran across. Okay, that was normal. Their dinner and drinks got there so they went to the one before that one. No one wanted to eat anymore.

The other palate cleanser marked video was a lot more goofy. A very hyper Xander Harris bouncing his way through a battle. Which confused people but he won. Greatly. Without many injuries. The other side was so confused they mostly stood there looking confused until Harris pulled out artillery and blew them away. Then he bounced off eating a candy bar.

"Well." Hill looked at the others. "It seems the trainer down there is ...young."

"He grew up in Sunnydale, had no military training outside some sort of possession and role playing games," Fury said dryly. "And whatever he learned on the job since he was sixteenish." She grimaced. "The slayers are all bouncy anyway." He flicked on a different video, managing his dinner now. The first battle Harris had apparently.

He had warned the generals that it wasn't something normal or nice and they had told him that they knew what was going on so he was thanking any Goddess who was listening while pulling out materials for them and offering them what they gave the slayers. They said they'd talk after this.

Xander said he had a few extra swords but they noted guns. Xander smiled and reminded them it was probably beheading today so they groaned and waited to see what showed up. Which Xander yelled at to go home. The generals snickered but a few fled him. Then Xander hopped in with a battle axe of all things and they all got to watch him whacking away at demons for a bit over an hour.

At the end Fury nodded because the generals took the information and settled in to talk to him about the slayers and all that they knew so far. "Great. He's mostly trained and they knew some because they were keeping it quiet to protect the people. At least they didn't discount him as a white guy showing up to handle things." He finished his beer and tossed out the bottle.

"Someone's going to have to teach the girls how to work with agents and military people," one of the top handlers noted.

"He sent agents," Maria Hill said before anyone could note that could be her job.

Fury smirked at her. "Ones who're a lot like them."

She stared at him. "I've got to go take down that child selling ring, Director. I'm not available for a side mission. You sent Carter, she can do that."

"Point. They'll need a standard liaison as well. Someone to pass information to." He looked at that handler.

"You sent five agents, including Carter, who can run field missions and other agents in the field, Director," he said dryly. "She can set up relations as well."

"Fine." He smirked. "But you two may still be called on to help."

"I'll jump into any battle I can help with but I don't have sword or machete skills," Hill said.

"I have machete but not sword skills," Coulson agreed. The others all nodded they had the same training.

"Summers said part of their download was weapons skills with their usual ones. Swords, crossbows, stakes, all that stuff," Fury told them. "She said she hates guns but all the girls have to learn to use one just in case, and they all like to pet artillery." He grinned.

"How did they get artillery?" Hill asked.

He smirked. "Kitten poker apparently."

She considered that. "Do I want to know?" He shook his head. "All right. Can we close that loophole while letting the girls borrow out of our armory?"

"Hopefully."

Willow appeared, smiling at them. "Sorry but can't let you do that. A lot of that stuff goes off world for rebellions that have good reason and keep immigration to here down by solving their own problems. We can't let you disturb the poker circuit. It's the major method of information passing beyond the gossip shows on the demon networks." She smirked and straightened up.

"Miss Rosenburg, before you go can you please change back the one you made a cat?" Hill asked dryly.

She shrugged. "Probably." She did that and then shrugged. "I guess she is." She disappeared again.

Hill call that in. The cat in the infirmary was now a human who wasn't Victoria Hand and she was found hiding in a storage closet they had let her hide in earlier. "We had two of those, Director. It changed the other one in the infirmary."

"Good of her," he said dryly, nodding a bit. He looked around. "All future recruits are to get at least machete or short blade training from now on. All current agents without it are to be encouraged to do that as well. There's a group of young women who're taking part of our job and I'm pissed as hell it's making them fight for us when we're all set to do that.

"They can protect the others, but SHIELD can protect itself." They all nodded. "All recruit trainers are to view all the battles we have film of by tomorrow night. The academy as well. I want our geeks to find a way around the whole blessed weapon thing that they have sometimes.

"Also, there was a sealed shut Army program that had been torturing demons, people. They rightly shut that shit down the hard way. Find their files, make sure we have *none* of those Rangers or geeks here. Ever. If you find them doing something in the field make sure they can't do it again.

"I'm told the UN has them on a demon hunting team and Homeland got the rest. I pity them having to deal with them but hopefully it'll be with a jail cell finally." Hill nodded at that. "Make sure of their information against what the slayers have and make sure that anything identifying is not released so no one else gets hurt.

"We are not going to earn ill will from those peaceful communities because I have a feeling it'll quit being so peaceful if we do, people." They all nodded at that. "But I do want to know what they found out. Without going anywhere near that same ideology. Any of our geeks wanting to mirror that? Tell me once you've got them in a cell or in reprogramming if they're mission critical." That got another nod.

"For now, protect the slayers from the yelling idiots on tv and other places if you run into it. They've got girls in a few cities in the US and internationally plus the minis as they call them learning at home. Make sure not a one of the children get harmed especially. Learn how to jump in if you must. Give me battle prep orders for the next one coming up once we find out." They nodded and left to start those orders.

He leaned back, looking at Hill, who shrugged. "Let me go sign up for a machete refresher course." He went to do that. He hated that innocent young women were called to protect him. That was his job to protect them, not the other way around, and he wasn't going to make them have to protect him and his people. They should be happy young women no matter what, he agreed with that principle, but they shouldn't have to have huge battles either.

***

Xander got recalled to England, nodding at the man meeting him at the old building's site. "Hey. Xander Harris." He held out a hand.

"Nigel Collingsworth, Cursebreaker, Mr. Harris."

"Call me Xander. I'm not stuffy like the old watchers are." He looked at the building. "This wreck again. Okay, did they give you my report or the plans for the building, anything?"

"No."

"Yeah, they didn't me either." He pulled up his report so the guy could read it. "They had non-wandy magic if it matters."

"It may. I know a few who've studied some of that if we need the help."

"The whole library is huge," Xander said dryly, smirking at him. "Half of it is probably books of prophecy that may or may not be wrong or even stopped. Some of them are some former watcher's shitty ideas of what demon species are like. But we need it at the new Council so we can rewrite a lot of it."

He nodded with a grin. "We can clear most everything out of the building."

"Great. Which slayer did they send over?"

"Ummmm....why would they?"

"They had demons, higher level demons, trapped. I can get some of them but I'm not a slayer and a few will take a woman with a blessed blade."

"Ah!" He nodded with a grin. "Aren't there some locally?"

"London. Korie's in London and she's okay but she's also in college so may not be totally available. There's a few girls in London who go on patrol but they also have day jobs."

"Oh, okay. Can we rotate them out?"

"Yeah, probably. I can ask that. I just train the minis in Africa who're at home and help out with battles down there. The head watcher guy over the UK is Herman Hanners. He's a tall, part Pakistani and part Swedish guy who got sucked into the old Council out of college. It freaks me out because he sounds almost exactly like Spike used to. Down to the same swearing and the same voice almost."

"Spike?"

"The master vampire Spike? One of the Scourges of Europe? Buffy's ex before he died?"

The cursebreaker nodded once. "That's very weird. We wouldn't even know about that sort."

"We know three of the four of them. Buffy took out one, dated two of them, and the other one is kind of insane but is a seer who's never wrong. She's just...Dru." He shrugged. "Spike had something to limit his feeding thanks to the Army screwing with demons and torturing them. So he helped the team and sometimes got chained in a tub or my recliner."

He shrugged again. "So, let's look at the outbuilding first? I'm pretty sure that was the magic working area so there might be things we could use to stop anything showing up out of being trapped."

"Okay. Lead the way." Xander took him to show him which building was which and let him look things over. He had to call in some help almost immediately for the hellhound but Xander settled in to pet the poor thing until he napped against his thigh. The other wizards were not amused but if it wasn't going to attack, they weren't going to hurt it.

The tomb team got there to clear out the fallen outbuildings first. Not a lot of artifacts but some books and a few things. A few trapped beings. Xander glared at one so she fled. The others just went back into confinement and stayed there. Xander grinned. Cursebreaker Collingsworth was amused. Greatly amused. He didn't know anyone like this guy.

Some tanned, fit, smiling with too many teeth, looking a bit too perfect, guy drove up in a fancy sports car and got out. "Xander! Baby! Long time no see."

Xander looked at him. "Didn't you stiff me with a check the last time we had dinner when the poison you tried didn't work?"

"Well, yes. Sorry about that. Orders you know." He grinned. "Are you local enough to have dinner tonight?"

"We're cleaning up the old building. Right now they're handling the minor things before we tackle the huge problem that is the former library." The guy looked with a grimace. "Sorry, I'm here to help get messy and protect these guys." The hellhound woke up and looked at the guy before letting out a light growl.

"I know, he's a bad agent guy, but he's probably not tasty." He looked at him again, going back to petting the dog. "Maybe before I leave but you've gotta pay this time. Travel wasn't included in the orders so I had to get myself and my truck up here."

"I guess I can. How long are you in town for?"

"Probably a few weeks. We have to clear the library and things out." He pointed at the building. The agent grimaced again. "Tell your bosses I said hi."

"I can do that." He got into his sports car and drove off again.

Xander shook his head. "Agents," he muttered. The curse breakers stared at him. He grinned. "I seem to draw slightly bad guys to want to date me."

"Great. Let us know if it's one of ours," one of them said happily. They got back to work. They finally got the magical building done and opened the front door of the main building. That's where Xander had to mostly stop and they had to fight that spirit too. "He's doing it for your own people," he told the spirit.

Xander got up, walking over there. "Giles is in charge and he wanted the library and things moved to the new center since this building's not even protecting the books." The ghost tried to hit him so he sucked it into something.

"Just inside is some sort of thing that makes you feel like you're in a maze when you're not." They checked and carefully moved in. They had to break a lot of protections. Banished a lot of spirits. They did a spell to map the whole building and found it was worse than they thought. This would take some specialist skills.

"Why do they have an Arthurian vault?" one asked, looking at the map.

Xander looked then at them. "I wasn't part of this part of the Council. I was doing the job in Sunnydale with that slayer and got hired on afterwards. As for that one, as far as I know, they don't have anyone buried there but this is the Council and they've had power for way too long." They groaned but nodded.

"If so, can we bury them?" They all nodded. "Thanks!" He looked around with a frown. "There's talking mystical artifacts." He carefully slunk into the building and to where they were summoning him to. He stared. "Great! Talking swords! Just what I need. If one of you possess me I'm having your blades broken," he warned. They all quit trying to get him to pet them.

"Thanks. Doubt you'd like the hyena anyway, people." He looked around. "All right, one at a time," he said, patting one. "Starting with you. Sound off your name and whatever I need to know to identify you." He took notes as they did that. "Eleven mystical swords. Okay." He looked around. "I almost expected Excalibur."

The swords all laughed at that. "Any other entailed mystical artifacts in here?" he asked loudly. A few more things sounded off and he found them to note what they were. "Let me get you guys out of here and into the fresh air. Unless some of you don't want to go outside?" They let him carry the up and put them on the grass.

One of the cursebreakers came over to look at them. "They're clearly magical." He touched it and whined, letting it go and stepping back. "Possessed!" he shouted with a point.

"Yeah. There's eleven mystically entailed swords, a few shields, and a chamber pot." He let him see the notes. "I need to call Giles on video conference if that's going to bother anyone." They watched him do it. That was tech their people wanted to know about. He waved as soon as the call connected.

"Scarvner, get you and Giles and the book guy with the blue tie in on this. I found artifacts. They're chatty." The others were summoned while Xander let the phone scan over the list so the guy could take his own version of them. "That's who they said they were."

Giles looked at the images. "Oh, dear. Scan the swords, Xander." He did and Giles moaned. "I had no idea we had those!"

"The guys here asked why we had a vault labeled Arthurian vault?"

"I have no idea," Giles said, looking at Scarvner, who was an old line research watcher over artifacts. "Any idea on any of this?"

"That was the primary basement level, lad. All of that was hidden for their own safety. The Arthurian vault does not have a body but it does have things that we suspect may have come from Camelot itself. We couldn't be sure of course but the ones at the time swore they were. The chamber pot, he died while on it and it got possessed." He stared at him. "I would've thought the outbuildings first."

"They did. The wand waving guy here brought in their tomb team." He grinned. "They already cleared all that and I sucked in the spirit that tried to stop me last time. They got the maze thingy curse."

Scarvner nodded. "I'll be over tomorrow to help with all that. I kept notes on most everything; we had to index them better than we had been. I was putting it on the computer." He left to go pack a bag.

Giles nodded. "Protect them for now. Let us know if you run into anything of true note." Xander panned the camera to the right to what he had seen flying in. "Oh, dear," he moaned. "Xander, be very, very polite."

"Of course." He walked over. "Hi, I'm Watcher Xander Harris, over the girls training at home in Africa. The New Council is digging out the old Council's stuff to transfer it to the new center in Cleveland. Did you need to come claim something or need to get into something?"

The obvious guard, who was a flying fairy in chainmail, stared at him. "Why do you read as evil?"

"I was born on the Sunnydale hellmouth. I helped the Slayer Buffy guard the town." He grinned. "I somehow managed to suck up a lot of it. We're not sure how, but I wear a shield." He shifted it.

The guard flew backwards, nodding at that. "Wow."

"I get that a lot." He grinned. "Can we help you find something that the old Council stole from your people? We just found the chatty, entailed swords."

The guard shook his head. "We felt the building be bothered. We had a treaty to help protect the building itself."

Xander nodded. "Some of the people in there weren't worthy of the title human so I fully understand. A few of the girls cheered some of the old Council going down."

He nodded. "So did we. Travers was annoying."

Xander grinned. "Rupert Giles is now in charge and we're in Cleveland now. In the US by that hellmouth."

"I'll let the others know, lad. Are you taking down the building?"

"Clearing it out definitely. Once everything's out it can fall in."

"That's fine. We can do that." He looked him over again. "You're not wearing a suit."

Xander smirked and shook his head. "Nah. I'm Princess Elsinore's savior and she complained about the same thing."

"OH!" The guard blinked a few times. "She is up here to make a treaty marriage!"

"I wish her great health and happiness in that marriage." Xander grinned. "I hope it's a happy, safe marriage with no complications for their very long lives."

"I'll let her know." He stared at the human. "Most of you are very weird about us."

Xander laughed. "I've been down in Africa for the last few years. I've run into hell gods and goddesses, pagan deities, ones who thought they were deities who were human and not. I've run into the fairy colony down in Madagascar too. Twice now. Once to get a baby slayer that ran away to hide in their forest."

The guard sighed but nodded. "That's fine. Is that your head?"

Xander showed him. "That guy in the center is Rupert Giles. The one on the right is Derrick Marcana. He's the head of the translation team. The two on the left are both Sedarts, one's William and the other's Augst. They're both training watchers doing the book work with the girls."

Giles bowed. "It's a pleasure to see the guardians of our former building, Guardian. I hope we caused no offense."

"No, not at all," the fairy said. He looked at Xander. "Just cleaning it out?"

"Handling anything trapped. Moving the books and stuff to Cleveland. We have Scarvner showing up for the swords tomorrow."

The fairy guard nodded. "Might be a good idea. They'll get very wet tonight."

"They can hang out with my axe in the back of my truck with me," Xander said with a grin. "She could use some companionship that's not me."

"That's not a horrible thing I guess." He shook his head quickly. "I'll let it be known that you're cleaning up the mess and expect the building to end up in rubble afterwards."

"I can knock it down once all the protections are gone," Xander offered. "I do love me some explosives."

The fairy guard grinned. "You seem like you would, Xander Harris." He flew off giggling.

Xander looked at the phone, shrugging at the dirty look Giles sent him. "What? I was a good, polite boy, Giles."

"You were," he agreed. "Very much so for your usual self, Xander. Yes, the building can be destroyed once it's cleaned out. Please guard those swords for Scravner. Then do get some rest tonight?"

"I can do that." He waved and hung up, looking at the cursebreakers, who were staring at him oddly. "What?"

"People who think they're deities?"

"You've never met anyone who thought they were a God of some kind?" he asked.

"Yeah," they decided. "We have." They got back to ending the traps. Anything with fairy based magic was carefully transferred to a loose stone and set aside so they could reclaim their magic. The rest they ripped down. That brought an old crone from the Coven.

Xander looked at her when her car door slammed. "Hey, Clorisma. This is the tomb team that we're being leant for the building clearing."

She walked over, staring at things. "They're certainly efficient. Boys, a lot of those were laid by us," she called. They stared at her. "Hi. I'm the senior witch at the Devon Coven, boys." They looked confused. "Don't do magic?" They showed their wands. "Oh, you're that kind. All right." She came over to help them unravel the spells and protections they were working against. "We know about you lot but you never seem to hear about us."

The head of the team nodded. "We had no idea there were still herb and candle witch sorts, ma'am."

"We never left," she said with a smile. "We in the Devon Coven are quite intertwined with the Council." They nodded, talking to her about stuff while they worked and Xander cleared things out of the building so it was safely out of the way.

Though he did have to stop the hellhound from chewing on a sword to get that soul.

***

Xander looked over as former Watcher Hayes showed up looking amused. "What happened to Scravner?"

"He got arrested as soon as he landed due to embezzlement from his sister's company." He came over. "The swords?" Xander let him see them in the back of the truck. "That's not very respectful to them."

"They're having fun talking to a few other artifacts." He grinned. "We're about to go past the left vault by the map they made. We'll need a slayer on site."

"I'll let them know. How are things going?"

"We've gotten the bottom six basements, including the never ending one. We've gotten the first floor meeting and greeting rooms cleaned of furniture. I rented a warehouse for it for now until it can be shipped over. The artifacts are going to one that's got security and Giles told one of his people from the Natural History museum to oversee it with the guys from the bank's higher ups." Hayes nodded at that. "Otherwise, it's a slow day. The main staircase has a few new protections we just tripped into."

"Some of those can be removed if you're marked as a watcher." He went to help and they went quiet for him. "Back until the early eighties, all watchers were marked when they passed training. The protections would quiet for us because we may need to grab something. Then Travers found out and ended that so no one could do things he couldn't do."

The tomb team grimaced at that. "He was bad all around, Lads. I'm former Watcher Hayes and the liaison from the Council to your ministry." They let him look over what they had found. "Is one of the coven here, Harris?"

"In town. Getting a nap." He sent her a text message. "She'll be here in about ten minutes." He walked in there. "Is that something that'll try to come out to eat me so it can be defeated like the others were?"

"No," one of the cursebreakers told him. "Not in the least."

"Okay. I'm going to back to telling the swords dirty jokes until you need or want me." They grinned at him. "I know when I'm in the way and usually that's around magic." He let them handle it.

Hayes smiled at them. "Magic can go spectacularly wrong around him but we were never sure if that was Rosenburg's fault or not." That name got a scared look. "She's healthier, people. Only worry about her if she shows up being mad at him. They've known each other since the first day of primary school." That got another mass nod and they went back to work.

"It was probably the hellmouth's doing," Xander called. "Tara didn't have that problem."

"That figures as well. It's the second most popular opinion of you," he called back. "That you're the personification of the old Hellmouth there wanting to get out and about."

"As far as I know whoever my father is was human," Xander quipped. "Probably. Mom wasn't usually *that* drunk." He leaned in. "The hellmouth only met me when my mother went into labor in the school. Then she had nightmares for years about plants and vines helping her deliver me." He went back to his truck.

Hayes nodded. "That figures," he muttered. "We consider Xander very unique."

"He's kind of scary," one of the cursebreakers said. "He took on a demon with an axe."

Hayes nodded. "Many times." They groaned but got back to work so they could finish this problem up sooner. Then the American could go and take all the nasties with them.

They all stared out at the sound of a squeal and then a slap.

Bouncy young woman.

Trendy, showy, bright clothes that showed too much of her.

Heeled boots.

Xander hugging her and her bouncing against him.

Hayes shook his head. "Slayer Korie." They just nodded at that and left it there. They had no idea and didn't need to know probably.

***

Hayes showed up in Cleveland with the shipping information, handing it to Giles when he met him at the doorway. "Harris said he is not coming back here, the hellmouth is acting weird and he doesn't want it to cuddle him. He got enough of that from the ancient one up by the coven." He grimaced. "Which freaked out the coven, the others not affiliated, and the fairy colonies up by it and nearer to the former building."

"Why was it acting up?"

"He found out someone was pulling on it and it didn't like it."

"Ah. Did they stop that one?"

"Yes, quite." He smiled. "The wizards were not amused."

"Excellent of them to save Xander some work then." He looked at the shipping manifests. "All of it?"

"Minus a few things that should not leave England. I talked to some of your former coworkers, who could take them in for a special museum. Though one sword was still complaining that it didn't want to be posed with some armor because it had been stuffed inside a suit of it for years."

"I can agree with that I suppose." He led him to the office. "How is Xander?"

"Tired. Nothing let him sleep for nearly a week. The last beast that came out Xander glared and growled at so it fled. We kindly sleep spelled the poor lad. He and his axe were in the truck for over a day sleeping. It let the wizards move what they needed to move without Xander chatting and confusing them. Or the slayers."

"Excellent news. Is he heading back to Africa?"

"The ambassador from Turkey to the UK asked him to show up to look at their hellmouth. It seems it's been glowing. I figure someone's trying to call on that one. So he'll go there then back to his trainees."

"I'm sure they miss him horribly."

"Probably. The girls probably adore how bouncy he can be with them." He waved a hand. "Even most of the furniture. I had the insurance people look over what we had rescued. They had undervalued the contents by quite a lot so we don't owe any of the payment back. If they were honest they'd actually owe use a few extra hundred thousand for the things that got broken and destroyed. But they're an insurance company."

Giles nodded. "I've expected that. Travers was a cheapskate."

"That's probably the nicest thing ever said about that man." Giles smirked at him. He smiled back. "Even his wife hated him. Anyway, it'll be here in six days. You'll probably want a nearby warehouse to store them in so you can go over them. This building won't hold all the contents even if it were empty."

"I can do that. The mystical things?"

"Mostly locked up by their bank. Scravner finally made bail and showed up to go over the indexes they had, finding they had another few floors of things he didn't hear about. There were apparently six basement levels, one with a spell to stretch the area, and that had a storage area." Giles winced.

"Oh, yes. It was supposed to be pre storage so you could identify how bad something was. The bank was most gracious to take that whole floor from our hands. Plus a few other things with beings stuffed in there. Did you realize Harris was hanging about with some of the ancient deities down there?"

"I would have spluttered if I had been drinking," Giles chided. "But I have no doubt they've met and probably worked together somehow. Which ones?"

"D'Nar, the garden goddess." Giles sighed at that. "Larvarat, the sexual pleasure goddess. Nort as Xander called him, who was over healers. Especially battlefield healers. He called on him to help a nearby healer who was trying to heal her own child. Used a poker debt and possibly a night of pleasure. There were about seven that showed up for a poker game. The cursebreakers were a tiny bit upset by that."

"Well, if he's working with them then they're probably not dangerous to the girls," Giles decided.

"We hope. Can we be sure he's not being tainted?"

Giles stared at him. "Xander nearly married Anyanka when she had lost her power center. He left her at the altar because it was what was best for her. She got her powers back then lost them because he had awakened her conscience."

"Oh, dear Lord," Hayes muttered, shaking his head quickly. "So if there's any tainting it's the boy tainting them?"

"Quite possibly," Giles said sarcastically. "I've love to see that boy in a happy relationship. If he becomes a consort we'll make sure the wedding present is tasteful."

Hayes nodded, going to talk to the other old line watchers. One of them in the library handed him a shot of whiskey. "Thank you."

"We figured you needed one since you spent a week with Harris."

"Two weeks cleaning out the old building." They poured him another shot then a third. "He plays poker with ancient demon deities."

"Does that really surprise you?" Buffy called from finding something to read. "If they're good to him and he's happy we'll all clap and find pretty presents."

"That's what your watcher said too, girl." He poured himself a fourth shot then went to lay down. Harris did give such headaches at times. The others understood and let him nap it off.

***

The SHIELD agent in charge of Harris was not amused to be asked to bring this box to Stark Industries. He wasn't a delivery boy, and he had no idea why Harris had made sure he'd *personally* bring it. He looked at the head genius in charge, shrugging when the man huffed his way into the room he was in. "The watcher over the trainees in Africa had me bring this to you specifically, Mr. Stark. He said the note explaining it was inside. He was insistent that I not let anyone like Fed Ex or UPS handle it."

"Sure," he said, nodding slowly. "Why?"

"Don't know, sir. He didn't share or explain. Just was insistent."

Tony huffed but did open the box with a security guy's help to stare at the thing inside. "That's...just went on the market." He opened the envelope sitting on top. "Found this with a terrorist group I gave to demons so I had enough time to raid them for their weapons," he read, making the agent shudder. "They had three, used the other two, sorry, but I don't want this to fall into any other wrong hands. What the hell?" he demanded, looking at the agent.

"I was not with him that battle but I know of which one it was. There was some higher being who showed up demanding tribute. Harris had me evacuating the towns around that area just in case. The group of unsavory people who were probably terrorists, though not officially as of yet, stayed behind to prove their worthiness to lead the people. They had...how long has that been on the market, Mr. Stark?"

"It's not there yet! It's on the list for next month's sale!"

"Does that mean you've got a leak or one of the people who do the physical making of weapons for you does?" he asked, starting to frown. Now, he had a clue why he had been asked to deliver this box. He didn't think Harris knew how to handle more than bouncy girls and battles.

Stark stared at him. "I don't know yet."

"Can I call in someone higher who can figure that out for everyone? Just in case?"

"Yeah, I think you can. Because this is very bad. I don't want my gear falling into the wrong hands. US and UK military only." He frowned, staring at the piece of bigger artillery. He opened the rest of the box and nodded. "Whoever cut some lines bluntly so it wouldn't have went off. Easily fixed if you know what you're doing because he kept a few of them so you can't figure out where they connect to."

"Harris knows a bit about artillery somehow. No one's sure how, Mr. Stark," he sighed. He called that in. "Director, Simon Mercator. Harris in Africa had me bring a weapon he found down there to Mr. Stark at Stark Industries that he found with a group that's probably terrorists but didn't have the official designation. Mr. Stark has said it was not on the market yet."

"We've just finished testing it last month," Stark said loudly enough to be heard as he went over it. "Whoever this guy is, he's good at figuring out how to disable it."

"Mr. Stark, if he used two of those in in a battle, what sort of land mess did it make?"

"I'm shocked it wasn't on the news," he admitted, staring at him. "Or was it?"

"No. They manage to cover up a lot of battles." He listened. "Yes, sir, he said there's a leak somewhere, Director. He needs help to beat people to find out where it is. Thank you." He hung up. "He'll have a senior agent and handler out here tonight to look that over for you, Mr. Stark.

"For now, the Director wants you to put yourself in a safe location. Because there's been rumors of a kidnaping plot against you as well. We apparently accidentally stopped one last month. We were anticipating one when you left the US to go to Afghanistan in a few months."

Stark blinked. "Excuse me? Why wasn't I told?"

"I don't know, sir. I've been in Africa for the last six months following a guy who once had too much caffeine and bounced his way into winning a major field battle nearly by himself with a battle axe."

Stark blinked a few times. "I...what?"

"Yes." He smirked and nodded. "Those Council people and the slayers? They use bladed weapons in about half their battles."

Stark blinked a few more times then just nodded. "Damn I need a drink."

"I've felt that way a few times." He smiled. "For right now, I'm to guard you to make sure no one snatches you or kills you to keep you from finding out their plots. Can we bring this to a safer area?"

"Yeah." He got a robot to put it into a locking safe and led him to the office where he could talk with his assistant as he shut off all communication out of the company's buildings. "Pep, there's a kidnaping plot."

The redheaded woman looked up from typing something. "Why?"

"Ma'am, some of our agents stopped one last month by accident. Now we've found out some of your designs have been in the wrong hands." She winced. "I've got a senior agent coming tonight."

"That's fine. Let us look too." She frowned but let Tony take her seat to go through the computer system faster than she could. "Oh, dear," she said at what was coming up after he had started the lockdown process. "Um, that's not good." She went to lock all the doors, including the bathroom door. "There's an emergency access in there," she told the agent. She looked at Tony, who was looking pissed off. "Tony?" she asked quietly.

He looked at her. "It wasn't my doing."

"I know that. I saw that. But...." She waved a hand at the agent.

Tony waved him over to see. "Your director does know that person. There's pictures of them golfing together with my dad."

"Charming. I'll make sure he hears, Mr. Stark. For now can you stay in here?"

"I need to go lock my lab down." He got up and they went with him after sealing that computer terminal. He was scowling so much no one even nodded to them in the hallway. Even the other head of the company, his 'uncle' Obidiah Stane. He grunted at him and the older man just got out of the way of the trio, looking curious about the guy in the SHIELD jacket. He'd hear the gossip later.

Or he'd hear it when Stark put the full company into lockdown and had everyone shelter in place. That usually meant an accident in a lab but not this time. Stane was still in a hallway but security ushered him to his office and stayed with him to protect him, as Stark had ordered them to. He got into his computer to see what was going on. "Boys, what sort of accident was it?" he demanded as he tried to log in.

The head of the security team looked at him. "Mr. Stark was delivered a large package earlier by that SHIELD agent. Apparently it was found somewhere inappropriate. So they're doing a count, Mr. Stane. All the systems are locked down until the audit is done."

Stane blinked. "What the hell? Why would he do that?"

The head guard shrugged. "He didn't explain his reasons, just gave orders with the lockdown and the only one who can undo it is his AI JARVIS. He did note that we'd have another agent showing up later, Mr. Stane, but no idea otherwise yet. For right now, we need you to be protected in here. You may want to call off any engagements tonight."

"I see." He considered it. He couldn't even get into his email. His wifi password had been changed. His email's password had been changed. "Damn idiot boy," he muttered. "What does he think he's doing by panicking the staff." Really, he was pretty worried.

That AI couldn't be gotten around. If it had full control of the company's servers, it could find the hidden ones he had sealed off. Probably already had. With agents on the way in to help with this audit and inventory count....Stane was in deep trouble. He could get out of here. "Boys, I have to hit the doctor's today."

"That's tomorrow according to your secretary, sir. We checked on the way in to you."

"I still have appointments."

"Sir, we are not allowed to let anyone leave the compound," the head guard told him. "Any attempt at breaking the lockdown will mean the quarantine system starts and that would panic the general public as well. You should probably cancel all appointments later, sir."

Stane pulled a gun and shot them all. It was enough to injure them since they had on body armor. "No, I don't think I want to do that." He moved to the door, finding it electronically locked but he had something to break that. He made it to the parking lot and found his car crunched into a tiny pile of car. He heard the whine of a laser coming on and got out of plain sight. He was saved by a SHIELD agent showing up behind him and putting a gun against his head.

"Mr. Stane, you're under arrest for aiding terrorists," the man said calmly and quietly. "Let's go, Mr. Stane."

"I will not. Do you know who I am?"

The agent stared at him. "Yes, I'm well aware of your dossier." Stane tried to fight but the laser hit him on the leg and made him scream as part of was burned. "Mr. Stark is not pleased apparently. Let's go. You can get that treated once you're logged into our jail." He waved and two agents came to gather him and arrest him. He went to the office area but his agent led him to the lab area. "Mr. Stark, what did you find him doing?"

"We found him selling arms to people I'd rather not see in power," he said dryly. "A whole lot of arms." He let him see that. Pepper waved a hand. "Did you and JARVIS get into the servers he had hidden, Pepper?"

"I did. It's not good. He was going to take over the company since you don't have any heirs, Tony." She got out of his way. He snorted, looking displeased. She looked at him, seeing the anger. "Want me to get Rhodey?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah. Get the loyal ones up here. Now."

"Happy, Rhodey, your personal geek team," she agreed, going to call them in. "Happy, Pepper. I know we're in lockdown. We found out Obie was selling arms to terrorists and had a plot to kidnap Tony, Happy," she said quietly. "I need you and Rhodey here please." She hung up and summoned the geek team, waving at Tony and the agents. "Stane had bad ideas. Help the boss." They moved to rip into those servers and his personal dealings through the SI system. That was theirs to rip into. The rest, SHIELD would have to get a warrant.

Tony looked at the agent. The guy looked a bit too calm right now. "You are?"

"Agent Phil Coulson, senior handler, Mr. Stark. I'm usually sent to deal with high profile problems."

"Fine." He waved a hand. "Please deal with that high profile problem. I have the feeling I've got to talk to generals. Or Congress again."

Pepper smiled and handed him some coffee. "Probably. I'll have your favorite suit sent out to make sure it's clean."

He grinned. "Thanks, Pepper. Redo the background on the pilot?"

"Gladly." She went to do that. She paused. "His guard team?"

"Wearing better than average body armor. So injured and already in our infirmary," Stark told her. He sipped his unfortunately straight coffee. "You could've added rum."

"Not the time for that, Tony."

"Fine," he muttered. He looked at Coulson. "Am I the high profile problem?"

"This situation is. If it was you selling arms, yes." He let out a tiny smile. "I'm glad our predictive people were wrong that you'd cause SHIELD problems."

"No, after this I'm making sure all agents are locked out of my systems," he assured him. "I found two hacking attempts by your people, one from Rising Tide of all stupid things, and one from the CIA." He walked off to look over his geeks' shoulders. "Anything yet, team?" They let him see what he had found. "Why in the *fuck* is he funding a new group that's working with the Taliban?" Pepper shuddered, staring at him. Tony rubbed his head. "Great. Just great."

"No, Stark, he was going to sell you to them," one said. He showed him the orders. "He was giving them you as a building slave."

"Slave I'm not," he said, taking that to look at. "Fuck him," he sneered, handing it to the agents. "I will make *sure* he's ended if I ever see him again. Am I clear?"

"If we can do it, he'll spend the rest of his days in a cell, Stark. Can you calm down?"

"Would you?" he demanded.

"I find being calm lets me plot faster," he admitted. He stared at him. "Please. It's counterproductive at this point in time." Stark stomped off to rant in the bathroom.

"Pepper, find his mistresses," Tony ordered from the bathroom. "See if they knew this or if they're just being used."

"Already looking for those three, Tony," she called. "One's in Cabo, one's in Switzerland for surgery on her hip, supposedly, and one's in Egypt?"

Coulson went to look at them. That was interesting. "You do find things very easily, Miss Potts. Interested in a job change?"

"Tony would die without me nagging him," she said with a fond smile. "So probably not."

Tony leaned out of the bathroom. "Do not try to steal Pepper again, Agent Coulson. I'll defend her and use you to test the new internal lasers." He went back into the bathroom to finish his fit.

She smiled. "He's a bit possessive sometimes. I make things make sense."

"Sometimes that's the easiest thing and sometimes the hardest," he agreed. He was realizing the whole profile SHIELD had on Stark was wrong. Neurotic, yes. Genius, yes. Unstructured, yes. Dangerous? Oh, hell yes. Easy to deal with? Nope. Probably a bit worse than dealing with his father had been since his father had a calming influence from his wife. This one only had an assistant. Plus an alcohol habit.

The lower agents were all amused but on edge. Geniuses could explode into evil at any given point in time if it seemed like the right thing to do. Would Stark go that evil? Probably. He did design weapons.

***

Tony Stark stood in front of the press people Pepper had called for him. "People, I need to be seriously upset here. I found out someone was using my company. A few people were using my company, my family's company, to support people who should not be in control of pets, much less people." A few flinched at that.

"As of earlier, we found out Mr. Stane, my former co-head, was selling weapons to terrorist organizations. He also tried to sell *me* to a terrorist organization," he said bluntly. A few shuddered at that cold tone. "My answer to that was 'hell no' very loudly as he was escorted off by agents.

"We also found his helpful agents that had put him in touch with said terrorist groups. I'm hoping the CIA and SHIELD have a *lot* of fun with their idiots who were also HYDRA." A few moaned. He nodded. "Yes, them. Never left apparently. After the last world war, the US and Russia took in scientists from Germany, mostly to up the cold war. Some of them were HYDRA, some weren't.

"So they were trying to take over my family's company," he finished a bit more loudly then calmed himself down. "To help reorder the world in their favor. Hell. No." He looked around again. "As of this moment, all weapons sales are on hold until we check who is buying them and make sure they're legitimate. Actually, right about now I'm about to say I shouldn't create another weapon ever again.

"I'm not totally sure about that yet so for right now, all weapons sales are on hold until we investigate the buyers. Are some people going to bitch and have a fit? Yes. They're probably on the wrong side though." He smirked. "I'm not into that.

"Never was and if one of those new age sorts could call back my father's spirit I'm *sure* he'd *love* to go talk to those sort himself. Instead, I'll do it for him. HYDRA can screw themselves to be blunt. I'm not working with them, for them, or around them. They get out of my way, out of my company's way, or they'll be flattened."

"Did agents arrest Mr. Stane, Mr. Stark?"

"Yup, sure did." He smirked. "SHIELD took him into custody as it was international crimes. The FBI can go nag them to get him if they want him." He waved a hand in the air. "If I see him out and about I'm going to end him. I already got him in the leg with a laser while he was trying to escape the lockdown. Any other questions?"

"How did we find out?"

"Someone in another country found one of the prototypes that's not even on the market with a group that was not the best for people. So he sent it with an agent to make sure it got to me." He smirked. "I'd like to thank him for that. It was very kind of him to let me know instead of keeping it himself for some later need."

"Later need?" that reporter asked.

"He's Council. He's the guy training the slayers down there from what I was told. They have battles. He said he found three and used two. Then disabled that one and sent it to me."

The reporter shuddered. "Wow."

"Exactly. So thank him for me, it was great work." He grinned a bit. "I hope he doesn't need more weapons that big." He walked off. "I need to finish going through the company's files. We've shed three executives and four board members already. I may need to fire more geeks too." He left to flashbulbs going off.

Pepper stepped up with a smile. "Mr. Stark is very upset," she told them. "Our person over the sales is presently being questioned as we go through his files so we'll see how that turns out. Until then, only the weapons department is on hold. The rest of Stark Industries is going as normal, though they will be looked over for such problems as well.

"If we have more information we'll let you know very shortly. Tony doesn't have the patience to let this be drawn out. Have a good day." She walked off. Tony needed to calm down. He was in his tinkering lab playing with his tools but not building anything so that was a great thing for him. She could keep him calm while the agents tore the rest of everything apart to make sure no other snakes were hiding.

Thankfully they had only found one hiding HYDRA person. That one had changed sides when HYDRA came for his genius child. He was now in protective custody of Stark with his family.

The reporters were reporting the news that HYDRA was still a real problem, not just a few agents here and there. They also got to talk about Stark Industries and how Stark was not happy. Plus they had learned more about that agency no one had heard of before, SHIELD. It would be a good news day.

***
Part 3 by Voracity2
It was late 2008, about a month after the election, and there was a watcher meeting in New York. Unfortunately. Xander was out getting dinner to get away from the stuffiness, hating him committee before he said something mean about them being all but ghosts. It was a mutual dislike society within the Council some weeks.

So he was out and about, looking at the too-fancy, radically weird restaurants in the Village. Of course, he was him so there were problems. He ran into a few gangs having an argument and stared at one until they sneered at him. "Guys, you're blocking the sidewalk. Do I have to pull artillery to get past you?" They got out of the way at that.

Xander did look a bit...wild thanks to having not gotten a haircut in months. He did look pretty rough actually. He walked past them shaking his head with a sigh. "Thanks." He ran into one of the local slayers, getting a squealed hug from her. "Hey. Out for dinner before I start a ghost banishing charm at the other watchers. On patrol?"

"Looking out for you. The other Watchers were worried you'd do something huge that would get attention on them again."

"The last time I saved the western coast of Africa. Did they want me to let them all die?"

"No. But they wanted to stay in the shadows."

"Then they probably should've blocked the cameras somehow in LA. And not let Willow go to Newsweek." She giggled, walking with him to one of the places she liked. He grinned at the idea of regular deli sandwiches, giving her a hug before going in to order dinner then coming out to walk around some more as he ate. He ran into another problem and groaned.

"Shit," he muttered. He ate the last few bites as he hurried over to stop the beating of the peaceful demon. His axe came off the pendant that charmed it tiny and he hit the human doing it in the back of the head with the flat side of it to get him off him before stepping between them. "Why are you beating up on a peaceful being?" he demanded coolly.

The other guys there started to say something so Xander glared. "Shut up, I recognize the racist patch on one of your jackets. You're all bigoted asses. So get out of my face before I have to cure that for you so God can tell you how to be a good human." They fled. He stared at the guy who had been in the lead. "Well?"

"He's not human!" he said with a point.

"So? He's peaceful, unlike you!" The guy glared. Xander stared back. "I don't give a god fucking damn if you don't like the peaceful community but I won't stand for people picking on them for looking funny. If you don't like it, go back to wherever your family came from originally.

"They're probably missing their idiots." The man took a swing and Xander blocked it and hit him with the axe again, knocking him back. "Dude, I fight for a living. Do you *really* wanna try that? Not like the peaceful community isn't known about."

The slayer ran over. "Xander, no, he's a hero sort."

"So?" he snorted. "Doesn't seem to be much of one if he attacks someone for being funny looking." He stared at the guy. "Back the hell down."

"I was protecting the humans that he was attacking!"

"He was defending himself. They have no special defensive or offensive abilities, including the inability to throw a punch because their bones are fragile. Check him, Daphne."

"I can do that." She moved around him. "Hey," she said with a slight smile. "I'm Slayer Daphne. Are you okay? I know there's a healer's near here if you need to go see them. I looked that up before coming in for the meeting."

"No, I was on my way home to get something for my wife so we can leave the healer's." He sat up with her help. "Thank you, Slayer."

"It's not a problem. I'm one of Boston's slayers usually but I'm in for the meeting." She grinned. "C'mon, I'll make sure you get to the healers."

"I need to go home to get the debit card."

"Go with him," Xander ordered. "Just in case, Daphne."

"I can do that." She helped him up, helping him limp off. "C'mon, I can even drive." She grinned. "I'm one of the few slayers that can drive." He nodded, letting her help him to his home then back to the healers, where she told the panicking wife what had happened.

Xander stared at the hero. "You're clearly out of time or something, dude. Everyone knew about the peaceful community. And they do tend to stay peaceful if they can. Why didn't you?"

"No one told me that!" He ran a hand through his hair. "I saw a weird guy attacking humans. That's all."

"Then I'd go ask why you didn't get told that." He looked around him at the suit wearing person rushing his way. "Oh, hey, it's an agent. So apparently your handler is here."

"SHIELD, Mr. Harris. Please leave Captain Rogers alone?"

Xander looked at him then at the hero. "Really?" He nodded slowly and carefully. "Huh. Knew you were an uptight prick from those videos they gave us at each detention. I stopped him and some humans beating up on a peaceful community member," he told the agent.

"Oh, dear. All right. Captain, do you need medical?"

"My head hurts a bit." Xander smirked as he put his axe back on the pendant then walked off. "I..." He looked at the agent. "Peaceful community? Slayers? What is that about?"

"You should have been told that, Captain. Let me take you back to the building to see why you weren't." He led him off telling him about how a lot of things had gotten uncovered.

"EXCUSE ME?" he demanded. "HYDRA's still around?"

"Not as much as they had been. And one of the demons outed them and the demonic community, peaceful and not, and the magical community. It's been a long year for most of us." He got him into the car to take him back so he could look that stuff up. He went up to Maria Hill's desk. "Ma'am, no one told Captain Rogers about anything that got outed?" he asked. "He ran into Mr. Harris protecting a peaceful community member against him."

She winced. "Rogers alive?"

"Yes, ma'am. Harris hit him with his axe but didn't try to cut him apparently."

"That was very nice of Harris. Find out why."

"There's a watcher and slayer meeting in town tonight."

"Charming." She stared at him. "You're getting him up to date?"

"Yes. He's still having a fit at HYDRA, ma'am."

"So do I. We'll gather up things to brief him about later."

He nodded and left to tell him that. Captain Rogers was learning how to internet things so he turned on safe search for him. "So you don't get anything too adult. Sometimes porn people use the most common keywords to drive people to their sites." He got him to a search engine and let him look things up. "There, Captain. They'll brief you about that tomorrow according to Agent Hill."

"Thank him for me."

"Her, sir. Maria Hill is the second-in-command for SHIELD and she's an icy bitch when she has to be," he said more quietly. "Get on her good side." He left him to research.

Steve shook his head. "Well. I'm sure Peggy could be too." He went back to searching out HYDRA while praying that his time in the ice hadn't led to another world war.

***

Xander came back to the hotel, nodding at Daphne since she was waiting on him. "He okay?"

"Yeah. I escorted him and his wife with her broken ankle back home too." She hugged his arm. "Was that really the guy on the detention films?"

"I guess. That's what the SHIELD agent said." He shrugged but hugged her. "C'mon, let's go hear the bitching they're doing."

"They mostly turned in for the night. They were going to have a field people meeting but all of you had disappeared in different directions for dinner."

He grinned. "I got tired of the semi-ghosts." He walked her up to their floor and checked back in with Giles, who smiled at him. "Deli. She found one for me."

"Thank you, Daphne. That's kind of you." She bounded off to har shared room. "A battle?" he asked.

"I defended a peaceful community demon?"

"You did what now?"

"A few bigots, Giles. I got one upside the head with my axe's side."

"Oh, I see. Charges?"

"No." He shook his head. "One was mistaken, SHIELD is correcting that."

"Excellent. The battle in Senegal?"

Xander shook his head slowly. "You wanted the whole western horn area of Africa to be dead?"

"No," he said patiently.

"Then hey, I won." He grinned. "I did it in a wacky way since I didn't have *any* backup but I did win. That princess now owes me a life debt since I spared her life so she could take the throne and call off the invasion. She had come over when I had taken out her brother and mom. She took the crown off her mother's head, declared her rule, and it stopped everyone to stare at her. She ordered them stopped, thanked me, said I was owed a life debt for that, and took them all home."

Giles blinked a few times. "What did you use before then, Xander? I have no reports on that."

"Artillery I stole?" He grinned. "I stole it from Mali's military people. And hell no I didn't write a report. If it's not on the news I don't tell anyone. It's easier on everyone to ignore such things, Giles. They all agreed about that." He went to his own room while the older man groaned. Willow leaned out of a room as he was getting his door open. "What?"

"You used artillery?"

He stared at her. "We've had six invasion attempts and a few other bigger problems, including three ascending ones. Did you think I used my axe on all of them?" he quipped then went into his room and shut the door, making sure she couldn't get through it. His usual protections were handy to keep out spirits, demons, witches, and anyone human. Though he did turn off the explosive to blow up the ones trying to break in. He shouldn't need that in a swanky hotel in New York City.

***

Giles looked at his field people the next day. "There are higher ups who want reports on every single battle."

"Down to what level? Like if we stake a vampire?" the one in Asia asked. "There's a ton in Seoul right now, Rupert."

"No, they don't need that. Bigger things they want to hear about. Agencies and militaries all over the world have asked."

"None of the ones in Africa. They carefully conceal all those so people don't panic," Xander said dryly, leaning back. "Their news people don't hear unless it's too big to hide. Northern Africa all agreed they don't want to know. It may be passed from the units that deal with it to the other units that deal with it for training things, but they don't let those out.

"Lower and Middle Africa feel about the same but some of the smaller rebel groups want to release some of it to make the ones they're fighting against look bad." He looked at the guy from Central America. "Yours? Are they admitting to things?"

"Feel the same way. They let one out because it was too big to hide. It ate a radio station that was broadcasting. So instead we had a slight case of Inquisition," he said in his Austrian accent. "I had twenty-three priests trying to get into my face about all this mess."

"I had one," Xander quipped. "I threatened to burn him at the stake for being a heretic to his chosen faith because he wasn't following the book." He beamed at him. "He ran crying to Mommy when I pulled out the holy water and it burned him."

"Why?" Giles asked. "Was he possessed?"

"No, I got it from Marantha's special spring. It's so holy it burns anyone but newborns." Giles shuddered. He grinned. "True, absolute holy water, yes. The other ministers with him saw that it was holy water. Tested it and one did get a bit singed. He went to pray too so he was right with God."

Giles nodded once. "How did you find a Hindu deity's special spring?"

"She's got a temple. She moved in with her sister for a bit when the Moguls invaded India and then married one of the native healers down there. He's a jackass about everything human but he will not deny a demon his healing skills even if they're evil. Healers Emmy and Elmira are part of his people. I lend them energy now and then to heal the damage that their healing skills took from them."

Giles nodded. "That's kind of you, Xander. Do you run into much strife?"

"I haven't ran into him yet," he quipped with a grin. "But a chaos deity of Brunei was visiting D'Nar's temple the last time I was there. He patted me on the head with a smile when I apologized for barging in to interrupt because I had one of her priests bleeding in the truck. He stopped a gazelle the hard way, with a horn to the thigh."

"That's nice of them." He sighed, looking at the others. "They would still like a general idea."

"Talk to General Kalani in Mali," Xander quipped. "He heads the training group for all the regional militaries for demon things."

"I can tell them that." He made that note and the others named their people in charge of coverups. He looked at them. "Do any of the rest of you have stories like Xander's?"

"He's got a lot of open area that's not been colonized or destroyed," the one in Asia said. "We don't." He looked at Xander. "Peaceful deities?"

"Most of the time. I saw D'Nar having a fit on her boyfriend once though." He grinned. "I adore that goddess most of the time. The one time she woke me up after two hours of sleep after a week of battles....that day not totally but usually I adore that woman. She has sense. She gave my baby slayers the birth control and big girl talks." Giles stared at him. "Not like I know how to use period protection devices!"

"Point I suppose," he sighed. He made that note. "Someone was worried you were conspiring too often."

"Nort's temple chef makes the *best* veggie soup. I can't even tell it's veggies. I usually stop to buy myself some and some for the girl I'm going to work with as I drive past."

Giles nodded. "It's reasonable you treat them nicely and like every other being?"

"Yes. Though I try to have manners."

"That's pleasant of you. Thank you, Xander." He looked at the others.

"Half of ours got removed by the colonizers," the one in Central America said dryly. "If they're there, they're among the normals."

Xander nodded. "That one coven in Gabon is sweetly full of high priestesses who nag," he noted. "They're very earth mother sort. I suggested to one that she write Willow about the differences in their versions."

"She has the Devon coven, Xander."

"These ones have been a coven for over a millennia, Giles. She could use the other methods being shown to her so she can learn more *subtle* methods. Instead of shaking the earth when she showed up to talk to the sobbing mini who had just lost her cat."

Giles slumped but nodded. "They may be good for her to learn from then. Who do they belong to?"

"There's seven high priestesses of mostly nature Goddesses." He smiled a tiny bit. "And one love Goddess."

"Ah. Yes, she could probably learn a lot from them with herbology."

"Oooh!" Xander said, sitting up. "They teach that shit at the magical school! There's one in Chad. They teach herbology there. One of them said they were writing to the teacher there about her abysmal ideas of how certain plants were taken care of, they had mistreated one of her Goddess' special plants."

Giles blinked. "That's good to know. Is that school secure?"

"Yeah. It's got a redirect. Even if you're looking for it. I tried to get a message there and couldn't so had to send it via a military guy. No white guys near there."

"Well. Very protective then."

"We also have a few closed realm sort of areas," the watcher in Europe noted. "Totally closed off magically to be a safe hole to hide in. One has a small school of magic. The rest are mostly commune sort of places from what I found out."

Giles nodded, making that note. "Good." He looked at the others, who all shrugged. "I'd rather we make peace with the magical communities too, people. We could probably use their help at times and they may need ours."

"The ones helping with the old building were fun guys," Xander quipped. "The bank's tomb team and the others were nice enough guys while we cleaned up the old wreck with Clorisma's help. They had no idea about the coven either."

"Charming," Giles agreed with another note made. "I'll talk to the coven later."

"Talk about the hoochie stuff please?" the one in Asia asked dryly. "Some of the girls look like they're clubbing for daily life."

Xander looked at him. "They get it from Buffy's part of the imprint." Giles swatted him. "Not my fault you didn't stop the backless shirt problem she had."

Giles rolled his eyes. "It's entirely possible we'll be giving the girls ideas about clothing restrictions."

Xander grinned. "I had one doing that and tossed her into some mud. She screamed but oh well, she was now more covered before someone said something. The older ladies all giggled that she was corrected that way when she stomped off to shower and change."

"You are harsh on that," Giles sighed.

Xander nodded. "Yeah! I've got some girls in areas that you can be killed for wearing the hoochie shit some of the Asia slayers do." He looked at him. "Boybands?"

"Do *not* remind me, Harris," he said dryly, then shuddered. "We've had one turned." Xander grinned. "They're pretty for eternity now and want freedom from their contracts to go find a regular life again." He looked at Giles. "Very restrictive and bad contracts on their lives."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," he said dryly. "The girls do not try to share their musical tastes with me. Thankfully."

"I introduced some of the Native American drum songs to some of ours," Xander offered. "They set up a sharing system over the internet so those ones could talk to the African ones."

"That's sweet of them." He looked around. The others looked a bit confused. "How many of you have young future slayers?" A few raised their hands. "Ah. Well, he has more."

"I have sixteen under legal age," Xander quipped. The guy from Asia shuddered. "Yeah. Yours?"

"Three under puberty, four after but below legal age so training." He looked at Xander, who grinned. "The girls do talk on that bulletin board Andrew set up."

"It's been good for them," Xander agreed with a nod. "Thank him for us, Giles."

"I shall. What sort of things do you need to do your job to protect the girls?"

"Sense. We all need sense," Xander told him. "Because if we had any we'd be nowhere near a battle." The others laughed but nodded. "Other than that, I just need a paycheck raise. Bribes are expensive. So is living in a hotel."

Giles sighed again, staring at him. "You've needed sense for years, Xander. That does not surprise me. As for the paycheck, you make what the other first year people do."

"I've been doing this for years now," he pointed out. "I'm not a first year guy. I'm also not in a stable location so can't just pay the house payment. Hotels and motels are expensive and I can only camp so often from the truck."

Giles grimaced. "I'll look into that." He made that note as well. He looked at the guy from Asia, who shrugged. "Yours? You were hired on the same year."

"I came in the next year, Giles, and I get my three-grand a month but I do less traveling with the girls."

Xander frowned at him then at Giles. "I barely make a grand."

"Asia is more expensive," the guy from South America said.

Xander stared at him. "I doubt it. Living in an apartment, yes. Living on the run like I do, doubt it. Plus I get charged extra for being a watcher and for being a white guy." He pulled up his expense sheet for the last month, showing it to them.

The one from Asia shook his head. "I don't pay for half of that. The Council does for my rooms and the like, lad." He looked at Giles. Everyone looked at Giles.

"I'm not directly over that but I'm going to look into that."

Xander grinned. "I could decide to move back to the US. Take over a city's house." Giles' eyes went wide so Xander grinned harder. "It's an option and probably cheaper. And hey, a few people want to declare me psychotic because of the past possessions. Someone in England tried to get me to talk about them so she could put me on the appropriate meds."

Giles shook his head with a sigh. "It's not multiple personalities."

"I can manifest them. I let the hyena come out to sniff her to prove it. She was not happy. Or amused. In fact she locked herself in a closet in the restaurant she showed up to nag me at. We went back to having a steak pie."

Giles sighed but nodded, hanging his head. "I'll work on that as well, Xander."

"Thanks, Giles. You might ask the redheaded disaster what her parents are doing helping them too." He smiled a most politician smile. "That'd be appreciated. I'm crazy because of the things I do, not because I got possessed."

"True, you could be considered fairly nuts to be in battles that way." He cleared his throat, looking around. "I know we need more field watchers." Everyone nodded. "I'm working on upping that cadre of people."

"If you send me another genocidal asshole I'm handing him to Xander," the watcher from Asia complained. "Let him play with him."

Xander blew a kiss. "I'd just feed him to something like the carnivorous waterfall."

"The fish in the waterfall?"

"No. The water's actually eating people. It gets clearer and softer when it's eaten someone." He pulled up his notes on that so he could read them over. "Native stories so I went to check. Sure enough, I fed it a dead bird and it got happy. Even the tone of the water falling changed." He let them run that video.

"How on earth?" Giles demanded. Xander shrugged. "Was it blessed perhaps?"

"The native's story said that at one time it had been a guy who was a glutton during the dry and arid season so they had turned him into water to help support the villagers he was eating out of house and home."

Giles moaned, sitting down. "Are there others of that sort?" The one in Australia grinned madly and nodded. "Oh, dear."

Xander looked at him. "One of ours down there wanted to tell his sister in yours hi and see if she'd write a letter. He hasn't heard from her in ages."

"Drea?"

"No. No, other Goddess living in the badlands he said. She was studying the plants." He let him see the notes he had made on that request. "Her."

"Oh, her. I've heard but have no idea. I'll see if she's around." He looked at Xander. "You made good with many natives."

"It's their land and peoples. I'm just there to help them protect it while training the girls to take my place when I die of it."

"Good point." He made himself some notes for later on. He'd call home later to see if his house could find her and ask her to write her brother.

Giles looked at Xander. "Are they wanting a meeting like this?"

"No." He grinned. "They can already do that. They have dinners and teas and all sorts of things. I ended up serving at a tea thingy once because I was healing in the temple and offered to volunteer so her healers could nag someone else."

Giles smiled. "That's very sweet of you, Xander." He looked at the others.

The watcher in Europe shrugged. "I'm fairly certain we ran them all underground."

"There's a few teaching at colleges," Giles said dryly.

"I've heard. Was horrified, then decided they're probably not getting sacrificial victims. Not enough virgins."

"Ya know, most of them don't want virgins," the guy from Asia quipped with a smile for him. "Believers, followers, but not virgins. The ones I've talked to I asked about that belief and they said it's considered tacky these days. Before it was to make sure they didn't get all the diseases known to human copulation."

The watcher over Europe moaned and shook his head. "That figures." He looked at Xander. Who shrugged.

"If someone goes to them of their own free will, as long as they're an adult who made that choice themselves, what do I care? Not my temple. I did not take that wish granting being's offer to become a god." Giles stared at him. He pulled up a report to hand over. "He's back asleep. He's living in D'Nar's shoe closet."

Giles read it over and moaned so loudly it made the others flinch. "Oh, dear Janus, Xander!" He looked at him. "When did you become a follower of a chaos god?"

"The guy stopped me, Giles. Someone else had told him who I was and why I was down there but he stopped me, not the other way around. I've only found a few demon cities." He grinned at the Asia guy again, sliding his phone over to him. "For your dad."

He read it and whined but sent it to his father's email. "He'd thank you for that, Harris." He slid the phone back over. "I think we have one."

"Two," Xander corrected. "One's in use."

"Oh. Really? We have a fully demon city?"

Xander grinned and nodded. "Somewhere up around northern Pakistan from what I heard and saw in a book in Nort's temple library."

"Interesting." He made that note to his father as well. "Like the one in Turkey?" Xander nodded. "Very interesting." He hummed.

Giles sighed again, seeming to deflate. "Xander, can you please calm down?"

"I am calm." He grinned. "I'm in a good mood. I had a full night's sleep, I got breakfast that I didn't have to cook or eat raw fruit for, I'm having a happy day, Giles. Aren't you?"

"I was." He held out a hand. "All the other reports please." Xander copied them onto a spare SD card to hand over. "Thank you. The rest of you's notes please?" They handed over their backed up reports the same way. "Thank you. How many will I need to drink about?"

Xander winced. "Yeah, about that one. Not my idea, not my plan, not my doing. I got there late. I jumped in and got there late. That was alllll that general's fault, Giles. Do not even think about blaming me while you're drunk from reading about the naked evil women trying to take over a country over by Algeria and the guys trying very hard not to hurt them but to drive them off when you had to use something specific. Thankfully hellmouth taint worked as well," he quipped when everyone stared at him.

"Lad, put that up," the one from South America ordered. Xander sighed but did, including the video. They watched it and that guy whined. "Shit, they need baby's blood to be driven off and can't be killed." They saw Xander smarm them with hellmouth taint and them try to grab him but he fought them off by kissing a guy. The others did that and they fled from all the gay men. That watcher hit his head on the table to shake it. "Well, now we know."

"I was surprised the hellmouth taint I carry didn't drive them off," Xander admitted. "Usually it will with their class of beings."

Giles blinked at him. "It does?"

"Yeah. Found that out back in Sunnydale, Giles." He grinned. "Our second year together. They showed up at the Bronze. They fled from me, Willow joked it was my ugly shirt, and Buffy said it was because I was a guy. I looked them up the next day to make sure they weren't succuba."

"No, they're like ethereal versions of succuba," he admitted, sounding weak. "Did they flee the town?"

"Yeah. Angel found them his first year in LA. Drove them off by asking me to come smarm them with hellmouth taint. They had an eww fit, ran for Oregon."

Giles looked tired. Really so very tired. "Why did I not hear about that?"

"Why would we have told you? You didn't want me to do anything in those days."

"Point." He sighed again.

"We were taught they ate magic, but hated radiation," the guy from South America said. "I guess that counts from hellmouth taint." He looked at Xander. "Why do you have something with hellmouth taint with you?"

"Because for some reason I sucked up half the radiation of the hole, Morris." He moved an amulet, letting some out, which made Morris moan but nod at that. "We have no idea why. Or how. But I'm a damn battery of it. And I pick up some from each one I'm nearby. Which is why I don't go to Cleveland. Ever again if I can help it."

Giles stared at him. "We thought it was trying to hug you."

"It was, before it invaded my body."

"Oh, dear."

"Yeah!" He nodded with a grin. "A lot. It felt like it wanted to make me pregnant with its energy so I said no."

"Please continue to do so, lad." The guy from South America sipped his coffee with a sigh. "How many are in Africa?"

"Three. They're all very nice though. That's actually how I met that coven of high priestesses. The hellmouth they were celebrating on got happy I was nearby so they made sure I wasn't a threat to it. They're the ones that told me I'm carrying energy from all of the ones I've been within a hundred miles of."

Giles stared at him. "When was I going to be told?"

"Never. Because some of the ghosts that live in your library want to sacrifice me and that'd give them a great reason. I'd hate to make you hire more people, Giles."

"True." He made a note to research that later. "Is the amulet new?"

"Oxnard. I had radiation sickness. The same as I did when Sunnydale fell in."

"Blast," he muttered, making another note. "We didn't even think about that being a permanent problem, Xander."

He grinned. "It's handy sometimes. I used it by accident to bless a community wedding to fertility. Which is when I seriously started to learn the meditations behind magic."

Giles nodded. "That's not a bad idea, Xander." He smirked. "I'll send you a few books?" Xander shrugged but nodded. "Good." He made that note and circled it. He looked at the others.

"No, Rupert, he's in a class all by himself. We're all sane," the one from Europe noted dryly.

"You hope," Xander quipped. "Bouncy pre-slayers can do it to everyone. Including themselves. I have one I *swear* is turning into Dru. Which is why I asked Nort to take a look at her for taint. By the way, she's in Angola. Has a new family of pretty ones to dance with." Giles gave him the hairy eyeball look. Xander shrugged. "I noted her when I asked God Nort to look at Mimi. He told me where she is."

Giles hung his head and shook it. "Oh, dear," he sighed. "We'll have to tell Buffy." He gave Xander a grin.

"I emailed. Got one back swearing at me but oh well!" He smiled. "I'm not going near there in case she still likes me."

"Good idea. She could turn you and then we'd all die from it."

"I'd never turn you, Giles. I'd want girls like Katya and Sherill." He smirked. "We'd be a high end, excellent hunting but discriminate group."

"Please quit," the one from Australia begged. "I like Katya."

"I adore Katya. She gets my jokes." He grinned.

Giles nodded. "I can see why he'd turn her instead of Faith." He made himself a note to watch out for that turning just in case Xander did get turned. He looked at the others. "Do you all have plans just in case?"

"I'd meet the sun," the one in Europe said. Xander wiggled. "There's ones that won't work on?" he demanded.

"Six species!" he said happily with a smile and nod. "Seven if you count the mythical one!"

"Fuck!" he said loudly.

Xander pulled up his notes for the others to go over. "On what I've run into."

The one from Asia had a few of his own to add to that but it was good the others got to hear about them. Just in case ya know.

Giles took his own notes to pass along to the library team. They hadn't wanted to be at this meeting.

***

Xander came out of the hotel with his bag on his shoulder, staring at the man in his way. "Jacques." He nodded politely and moved around him.

The guy caught his arm. "What are you doing over here, Harris?" he asked smugly.

"Watcher meeting." He got his arm free by prying the fingers off his arm. "What're you doing here since I doubt you should really be seen so many places with cameras. Not like you're not wanted in four countries at least."

The guy looked smug. "We decided to track you to see what you're doing."

"I had a watcher meeting with the other watchers and some of the senior slayers." He shrugged. "It's part of the job." He nodded at the officer walking his way. "Anything else? I have a flight later tonight. I have enough time to get lunch first."

"I think we'll talk."

"I don't think so. I turned your ideas down the last two times we met."

"Problems?" the officer demanded.

Xander looked at him. "This one is wanted in four countries for things like selling biological weapons, Officer."

"A likely story," he snorted.

Xander looked at him. "Oh, you're Paulie's minion guy." He punched him then Jacques. "Well, that's nicer." He walked back inside. "Hi, I just punched a guy who sells biological weapons in Africa on the doorstep and the minion dressed as an officer."

The receptionist called their security team, who called the cops and kept him there. Xander looked at the watchers coming out, getting glared at. "What?" he demanded. "The guy sells biological weapons. Did you want me to leave him alone when he came after me?"

"We don't know him," a few said.

Buffy came out next. "Bullshit. Stop lying. Xander?"

"Bioweapons guy," he said with a point. "Minion to an arms dealer that does rockets." The officers winced. "I'm the training guy over the slayers in Africa, people. I do know some arms dealers. That one's boss is going to get my foot up his ass if I can manage it." He scowled at him.

"I'm telling Junior on you." The guy flinched then laughed. "Oh, great, you and Paulie probably already killed him then." He looked at Buffy. Who was shaking her head. "I was going to introduce you to Paulie. He's dirty and nasty but not to his girlfriend. And he could use a new girlfriend."

"Um, not into traveling to Africa and an arms dealer isn't really in my usual group to date, Xander."

"He's a demon hunter too."

"Oh, that's nice. Sure, introduce us."

"Okay. If he survives this. Because he was going after Kurt and that guy's psychotic." He shook his head quickly. "Guys, can I do my statement now? I have to get lunch before I hit my flight back tonight at eight."

"If you get to go back," one of the officers said dryly. "I doubt it, sir. We only have your word." He looked at the agents that had just pulled up. "Oh, them," he said with a grimace.

Xander looked. "They're not agents, guys. That's not federal plates on that SUV." He pushed Buffy back inside, making her guard the others. "Kurt," he said with a nod and a grin. "You're okay?"

"I'm fine, Xander. What is going on?" He looked so amused at the guys on the ground.

"Jacques decided he wanted my attention, has Paulie's minion guy, so I punched them," he said with a hand wave. "What're you doing pretending to be an agent?"

"I am an Agent, Harris." He smirked. "MI-5."

"This is America, Brit intelligence doesn't have sway here," he said dryly. "I found that out when I was in England and ran into your brother again."

"Yes, I wanted to talk to you about how you broke his heart."

"I didn't do anything to him! All I did was say no because he's even more mentally bent than you are."

"You say the sweetest things. I'm sure you'll scream them when I torture you. Boys, he's mine. Watch out for weapons."

"I am like that." He kicked two then hit Kurt, knocking him down. Buffy came out to get a few for him but he shoved her. "They're dirty as fuck, Buffy. Go. Now." She nodded, going back inside to finish the evacuation. Xander heard a whine and looked then kicked the grenade out of the guy's hand and into the street, watching it go off to blow up one of the cop cars.

"Yeah, not into that either." He punched him. Then he pulled a sword and went after them. They all went down with cuts. The officers standing there were not happy but they were safe, mostly. One tried to jump Xander and got backhanded with his sword hand. Xander panted, staring at the group on the ground. "Next?" he demanded. Kurt shuddered so Xander looked at the demon. "You using them to track me?"

"No, Harris. We wanted to talk to some of the slayers. I've heard you admire a few for their strength."

Buffy leaned out to look at him. "Nope. Sorry. I don't know you and my girls aren't allowed to talk to hell lords without me there."

"I can undo your resurrection, Miss Summers."

She shrugged. "So I get to go hug my mom again? Yay. Died two times since then. You're behind on the news." She grinned. "Have a great day somewhere not in this nice, pretty, dirty city."

Xander wiped his blade clean with his overshirt, staring at the demon. "Let's talk, shall we?" Buffy shuddered at that sound. The demon smirked and produced some arm blades. Xander went after him and killed him but got injured. At the end he was barely standing but the demon was dead. "Fuck you and have a great afterlife," he sneered. "I hope it's *fun* for someone else." He wiped his sword down again and couldn't put it back. "Okay, can't bend that way. Buffy, come put my sword up?"

"She's been evacuated," one of the officers said.

"It goes next to my axe please." The guy put it on the necklace so it shrank. "Thanks." He shifted. Then sighed and winced, holding his arm. "Muscle cramps on top of needing stitches. This is going to take my lunch break," he muttered, walking off. No one tried to stop him. Even the actual agent who was showing up. "ER is where, dude?"

"SHIELD has a medical bay, Mr. Harris," Coulson offered.

"I don't trust your people. Especially with the one you sent me who's not all together good. I think I'll take my planned lunch time to get some stitches then hit the plane. Thanks though." He limped off muttering about his slowness. He should have hurt Kurt immediately when he recognized him. It would've saved him some injuries. Next time he'd do that.

The three dirty officers, who were in the employ and minions of Kurt, looked at each other then at their boss. Who was moaning in pleasure. The two actual officers were calling in for help. Coulson came over to be that help, arresting the dirty officers too. "They're in the employ of this psychotic mess that deals weapons," he told them calmly.

"I'm SHIELD. We can take custody, boys." They glared but oh well. FBI agents showed up and so did a few more SUV's of SHIELD agents. They got happy to arrest the bad guys. One bad one got missed but the local sergeant showed up and asked who that one was so they took him too. Coulson cleared up the mess with everyone and they all went to have a drink and make sure Harris made it back to Africa.

***

The agency heads met that night to talk about that incident. "How did a notorious arms dealer get into the US without notice?" Nick Fury demanded. "Much less three of them!"

The head of Customs shrugged. "They didn't come through us. I checked back, they did not land anywhere in the US, Director Fury."

Nick Fury stared at him. "Did they take a boat?"

"We'd have met the boat. We don't know which border they crossed from. Honestly, we can't track them at all. Could it have been that magic stuff?"

"No. They have landing spots," the outgoing President Bush said dryly. "I asked, they did not have magic and that demon could not have traveled that way. He had to be invisible, which was a known power of his, but can't teleport. So what happened and who was that guy?"

"That is Xander Harris, the watcher in Africa," Nick Fury said smugly. "The one that Wells called Batman."

"I can see why. Why use a sword?"

"Probably what he had on him?" Fury guessed.

"Could be I guess. Why was he up here?"

"Watchers Council meeting with the higher levels and senior slayers," the head of the ATF noted. "Our person in their armory was up for that as well. He did not like what Harris had to steal to use, we don't like them having artillery at all, but we realize that some things are too big and the girls don't like guns."

Fury nodded at that. "I leant a few trainers and they did not like guns at all. They learned them just in case but they pet artillery and hate guns. One of mine has film of a tiny slayer, about four, calling it her kitty cats as she petted a modular missile system."

"That's gotta be cute," Bush said dryly with a smile. "How did your people know to show up, Fury?"

"Coulson's apparently psychic. He was out for lunch. Heading to pick up Hill's lunch order from a little bistro she likes that's a few blocks past that."

"Aww, that's nice of him," Bush said. He looked at the others, who all shook their heads. "Okay. How do we make sure it can't happen again?"

"We arrest them when we find them," the head of the FBI noted. "I don't even have files on two of them because they're international only, sir."

"Fix that tonight." He looked at Fury, who shrugged. "Any ideas?"

"They hate that Harris took out a camp full of their buyers to get their weapons and handed one back to Stark; that meant he stopped the leak Stane was doing at SI."

"Well, shit," President Bush said dryly. "But good that he stopped it. How did he stop it?"

"He found tech that was Stark's stuff and sent the one he didn't use back."

"Oh, that incident. Okay." He nodded once. "That the only reason?"

"Harris said one tried to date him and he turned him down so Kurt, as he called him, was mad on his brother's behalf," the head of the FBI said. "We asked him when he was getting stitches. Then made sure he got to the airport."

"Thanks," Bush said. "He okay now?"

"Still sore. It's going to be weeks before he's not sore," Fury said. "By his injuries, he probably needed a good hundred stitches."

"Eighty-four but he did a few while he waited," the head of the FBI said dryly. "Who does that?"

"Kids who've had to do their own at home," Fury said dryly. "I have a number of agents who'd do that. I'm doing a DNA test to make sure the kid isn't a Barton." The president snickered quietly. "And he agreed with me." He looked around. "Did we ask him about his contacts and others he knew?"

"Yes, he said he went to them when it was desperate or got some off some poker circuit somehow. The militaries down there aren't weaponed up like the US military is. How do the ones in Central or South America get them?"

"Probably the same poker circuit," Fury said. "I've heard about kitten poker."

The president winced. "That's gross sounding. Don't tell me more unless you have to, Nick." He looked at the others. "So what do we do now?" They all grimaced and went over files to share with the other agencies.

***

Xander woke up somewhere strange. He was in a hospital. Someone in the hall was sounding German. He blinked, looking down at himself. He was all there. He felt like shit and like he had some broken things. He sighed, turning his head to the side and finding a general. "Did I pass out?"

"No, you did the bravely stupid thing, Harris," he said quietly. "We were losing so you last ditched it after telling my men to run from the field."

"Oh, that. Was that the last thing I did?" The general nodded. "Huh. I must've dreamed that sword battle then. Then again it was one of the mystical swords we found in England," he muttered. He blinked a few times. "Did we win?"

"We had to regroup and go back after you blew up the field and part of the nearby village but they were weakened greatly and we won after another two days of fighting." Xander winced. "The villagers were evacuated, all but a few goats and a dog or something." Xander sighed but nodded once then winced again from the pain. "We need to figure out how to know when you're going to do that."

"If I have to do that again, I think I'll die from it. I have no idea how I survived this time."

"You glowed. A lot."

"Oh, magical protections. Cool I guess. Maybe that's why I feel like shit, all the hellmouth taint I carry." He looked at himself then at the general. "But we did win?"

"Eventually. They were nearly taken out by that bomb and the portal was ended so we just had the remaining ones on this plane." He patted the hand on the sheet. "You're getting to go home for a few months."

"Um, nope. I can't be in Cleveland. That hellmouth will try to make me pregnant with its energy." The general looked so confused. "Like the one in Malta did that you saw the tape of? Like that only it'll be stronger because Cleveland's the most open one. I'll call Giles in a few minutes to see where I'm healing. Maybe I can hide my truck with me."

"It's back in the carrying case, kid." He went to tell the others. They called Mr. Giles, who agreed it wasn't safe to have Harris in Cleveland. He arranged for him to go to a spa area for healing, one that had dealt with injuries. At least until they heard it was for Xander and then they canceled it and said he was welcome there but it was too dangerous for him.

A few of his wanting society were there and would kidnap and torture him some more; they didn't want to be held responsible for that. Giles called Nick Fury to see where he recommended and had the kid sent to near LA. It was safe enough there and he could hide for a bit. Or handle things if they came up. Though they wanted a report. Giles put him on with that other general about that so they both got a report.

***

Nick Fury hung up on the conference and threw his phone at the window, breaking it. "Mother FUCKER!" he shouted.

The people in the next area all looked that way then hurried off to do something safer.

"Someone hack Mali's system so we can get tape of what the fuck happened there!"

"Seeing if we already have it," Maria Hill called, typing that. That team did not but easily found it and copied it for them. She brought the memory card in and set it up so he could see it. "Oh, dear." She watched too, wincing at the sacrifice play and Harris being severely injured but the rest handling the rest of the emergency. "Was that nuclear?"

"No," Fury said. "Barely." He huffed. "All right. All assets are to see this tonight. I want to know what the fuck we could have done to stop that."

"Brief all the presidents, sir?"

"Yes!" He waved a hand. "And get me some advil." She opened the drawer that held that bottle before going to call the others and pass on that battle's film.

Nick Fury took three and went to finish his seething fit. This was not good! His world didn't need destroyed by demon battle. Or magical battles since that was partially that too. Even those wand using sorts had tried to help.

***

Maria Hill was let into the conference room, letting the guards in there put the video up. "Earlier this week, Sirs. Near the Benin border." She let it run.

The MaCUSA president waved a hand so she paused it. "Why did I need to know, and which agent are you?"

"Senior Agent Maria Hill, Second-in-Command at SHIELD, sir, and some of your people were there." She let it run. She saw the upset and disgusted looks. She let it run through then looked at them. "By their reports they took an extra three days to clean up the massing ones that didn't get taken out by the bomb but they did manage it. We're assuming they're going to have a regional meeting about how to handle that."

"No slayers?"

"Yes, that brunette young woman in the shorts was one of the slayers. They've already held the remembrance for her." That got a nod. "The one that set off the bomb is Harris. He's alive. He's injured, going to be off-duty to recover by LA because having him in Cleveland is problematic."

"The girls won't let him rest?" Obama asked.

"No, the hellmouth considers him something to cuddle and infect with more energy. Which may be why he glowed that way. Either that or a protection spell we believe. He'll easily survive this but he's probably not going to enjoy it for the next few weeks."

President Bush nodded once. "Think they're going to hold a summit to talk about how to handle those things?"

"Mali's in charge of training troops to handle that specific sort of problem for the whole of Upper Africa, sir. I'm pretty sure they are. Some of theirs were there as well."

"Okay. So that was bad," Obama said. "What help can we give?"

"They may be asking about weapons. I would," she admitted. "Also about how to block those sort of portals in the future," she told MaCUSA president and the one coming to office in a few months.

"I have no idea if we can," the new one admitted. "I can certainly ask and talk to the schools down there if I find anything out."

"There's one we know of in Chad," she admitted.

He smiled. "Yes, I've heard. They have a fantastic herbology program with native plants and restoring lost species." He shifted to look at the other guy. Then at her. "Who is Harris?"

"The watcher in charge of the trainee slayers in Africa," Bush told him. "He works with the militaries down there to cover stuff up all the time so we don't all freak out if we hear. Most countries do if they can. We only hear about ones that make it onto the news. Is this one going there?"

"It was cited as a rebel action," Maria Hill said.

"That's a nice cover up then," Bush said with a nod. "What do we need to do about this, Agent Hill?"

"Right now, they're probably wanting some help to restock and some help to figure out how to stop it, sir. Director Fury made sure you'd see it before you hear about it somewhere else. Mr. Harris is not exactly hidden but only the demonic communities really track him. Or can find him at all sometimes. His own people often don't know where he's working.

"Sometimes on purpose." She smiled a bit. "The oldline watchers were more bookish sorts. Research geeks and those who told the slayers how to handle something. Very few field people and they all had trainees. Which they no longer do."

Bush nodded. "Good." He blinked a few times. "So this was an FYI that ruined dinner and they handled it?" She nodded. "That's fine then."

"Are we looking at any potential problems from our own country's peaceful community?" Obama asked.

"Actually, some of the peaceful community down there stepped in to help," Hill said. "As far as we can tell, there's some uneasiness going on but some of that was because Slayer Buffy is dating ...something that's upsetting Miss Rosenburg. They're worried they'll have a civil war sort of situation."

"Great. Are they?" Bush asked.

"Not that we can tell. Rosenburg likes to nag." She shrugged. "From what we've seen of her family, she gets it from her mother." That got a slight smile. "Those psychologists who do the book tours and talk about raising genius children? They're her parents." Obama winced. No one liked their ideas.

"Exactly. She's a lot like her mother. For right now, we assume there's going to be a summit event. We're assuming we won't have any problems with Harris hiding by LA but have no real idea as two of his recent dates were arms dealers arrested in New York after the Watchers' meeting." Bush moaned and shook his head.

"Yes, that event. Director Fury suggested a nice health spa by LA for him to recover at. We'll be watching over that site just in case while he's there. He'll be too sore to get himself free."

"Does he take over if Giles dies?" Bush asked.

"Fifth in line I believe. Or maybe fourth. Rosenburg is in front of him and everyone assumes that he'll take her out to protect the girls and it'll be mutual destruction so Wells will end up taking over. That would be the one who said he was Robin."

Obama nodded. "What's his position?"

"Housemother and sometimes an evil villain wannabe. We had to have two talks with him about his nanite creations that were making the girls quit picking on the geeks in their schools and once about them taking over Cleveland's city government to ease them on the girls not being evil. They all agreed Wells was more evil than the slayers." She smiled. "His former cohorts who were an evil geek triad have both died so he's missing them now and then by making up new evil plots."

All four presidents just nodded. "See if we can keep Harris in charge?" Bush asked.

"Sir, he has no manners."

"So? He does the job."

"Yes but the girls don't listen to him because Slayer Summers considers him *normal*." He winced at that. "Which to her is a lesser state and we all agree he's not normal."

"No, he's not," Obama said. "All right. When do I get to meet them?"

"Ask, sir. Mr. Giles could probably use a few days out of Cleveland. The tiny girls are bouncy about the holidays right now. They have something like sixty girls in the main compound house. Nineteen above the age of majority so on patrol." He winced. "They're good to them but they are *girls* and kept girls as long as they can be. So they have a whole group of first and second grade girls who're having a holiday soon."

Obama smiled. "My two were bad enough." He stood up. "Let me go tell Michelle. She'll want to try to mentor the girls. Do we have one locally?"

"Living at home and she's seventeen," Bush said with a grin. "Pretty nice young lady. Has some manners. Staked a guard who was turned then went back to chatting to the others waiting with her. They're all like that. Oh." He snapped. "Summers plays airhead *very* well. It's her persona." That got a mass nod. "Other than that, Agent Hill?"

"No, sir. Just a warning about a few possible things going on." She took the memory card back. "Have a better night." She nodded and left.

Obama looked at Bush. "I thought SHIELD was full of comic book agents."

"They are," Bush said with a nod. "Some are screwy, some are very comic book, Fury's got a black trenchcoat that floats behind him as he stomps off swearing at someone. That man swears more than some Marines I've met."

"Wonderful." He went to tell his wife what wasn't classified. She was amused, a bit. The other two went to talk about how to talk to their magic schools about that sort of problem. They didn't want it to happen again.

Bush went to hug his wife and daughters. He was nearly done with all the stresses like Nick Fury.

***

The MaCUSA congressional leaders were meeting with both presidents to go over that last battle. They had to figure out how to do it if it happened in the US or nearby that they could help with. Would they come out of the closet that way? Would they openly be wizards and witches or would they be a bit more hidden? They had to make some plans. There were already too many problems with magic. Including the hellmouth but that was an ongoing discussion of what to do about it. Or them really.

The new president came back from calling someone at one of the colleges. "All right, people. We have a few things we can do. We can go take measurements on the hellmouths. See if they can be uncharged or whatever. The magical portion of MIT is already doing that at one of the pre-formed hellmouths. It's not on that Council's map though.

"They looked at it and groaned but said they couldn't get near a few. I pointed out Sunnydale was empty so they could do that. Cleveland was a real city and theirs was in a park so they could go visiting. We can make plans to deal with any upcoming battles we hear about. Usually we're hearing afterwards so we need to talk to those Council sorts about how to handle that.

"They do have witches on staff but they're coven sorts, not our sort." That got a few grimaces and a loud groan. "They're working with an ancient coven out of England and have said if any of the US covens want to talk to them they're welcome to. They like modern witches. Their head witch, Rosenburg I believe, is a former computer hacker." That got another groan. "What?"

"She nearly ended the world in her grief a few years back," the groaner said. "The coven got her grieving properly but she nearly called up some artifact and made the whole world feel like she was. They trust her?"

"Grief can be healed," the new president said dryly. "Frankly, she helps hunt monsters and demons who aren't staying peaceful. Did you expect them to be normal, average sorts?"

"No," he agreed. "Have there been battles in the US outside the one in LA?"

"That's what happened to Sunnydale," the old president said. "Somehow the Seal of the First Evil opened and they had to go in to fight her. On the way out someone closed it and it sucked in the town." They all groaned. "Mr. Giles said they had yearly ones before then for the last seven years he had been there."

He pulled up one video to show them. "This is actually Slayer Summers' graduation." He let it run, pausing it once the demon was out. "Any idea what that is? They called it an ascension." They all shook their heads. He let it finish running. "By their files, the head had to come off. One died in Vesuvius. We've had a few in Africa that the militaries hid."

"Rockets would do it so much easier," the new president admitted, shaking his head and looking away. "Did we just ignore all this before?"

"All but the banks," the old president said. "I asked one when they were in to talk. They knew but let the ones over that handle it until they had to step in. It's only happened a few times in their histories." The new president slumped but nodded. "Exactly." He looked at the others. "Do we even have a statute of secrecy still?" They all nodded. "Even though we're in the open? What has the International board ordered?"

"We're not to use magic in public," one told him. "I'm guessing emergencies are different and it's not like we can obliviate a news crew and their cameras." She looked around. "I'm guessing here but we can't let the world slide into hell. So we've got to figure out how to handle that if it becomes necessary."

"Does the Council offer training?"

"I have no idea," the old president admitted. "It would for their watcher sorts. Some of them have coven style magic from what I've noticed. Mr. Giles' background showed he was part of a coven in London in the late seventies." One of them whined at that, shaking his head. "Bad?"

"Chaos magic, summoned higher level demons to learn from them. Ethan Rayne was another member, one of the last two with Ripper Giles."

"Oooh. So yes, he has some magic but doesn't seem to use it. His background check showed a lot of time spent with that coven in England during his college years."

"Great. Just absolutely great," that one agreed. "Will that sort work with us since we don't like to admit those sort still exist? Countries have laws against their sort even existing."

"Mr. Giles noted the ones in Saudi Arabia and had no idea they had a school for magic there."

"Yes, most of us consider those sorts to be pathetically weaker than our own magic styles," the new president agreed. "Is that ego on our parts? If one witch can destroy the world...." He spread his hands. "We can't do that."

They all shook their heads and considered things again. "We need to make peace with the coven sorts. Some of them could be trained like we are," the female said. "If they wanted to. If not, we need to see what they know that we don't and I doubt a modern day witchhunt will work. It's too easy to hide that and say you like candles and plants."

The others nodded at that idea. "We do need to reach out," the new president said. "They may have ideas on how to stop future bigger demonic problems. Where do we start with that though? They don't have an overseeing Council. They're not unified."

"We find the first one and ask them," the female said with a shrug. "They can either lead us to others to talk to or tell us if they know of any that use both styles or maybe teach at colleges and do research into such things." They nodded at that idea. "I'm sure the US has at least one coven somewhere."

"Point. All right, let's carefully ask around. Someone go talk to the Council themselves about the hellmouths and how best to magically help during things like a portal spilling demons." They looked at the new president, who smirked back. "It's your job in another two months anyway."

"I suppose I can do that." He went to call them to make an appointment. This was still very weird to him. He was a transfiguration scholar, not into defense and battle magics. The others went home to do some quiet looking to see if they could find a coven to start with.

One looked at Rosenburg's family but found her parents decrying magic and all things like that as fantasies. Even after being proven wrong on the air by a half-demon reporter.

***

Xander was healed, was in Cleveland for two days before heading back to get two of the senior girls ready to join him. The military leaders down there had chatted with the girls and him already so they knew when they'd be there. So yeah, Xander was avoiding the hellmouth's park as hard as he could, not even thinking about how it had gotten him on the plane as it was landing. Freaked out a lot of people when he started to suddenly yelp and glow.

He explained it as magical stuff trying to greet him and shoved it away so he could concentrate on the pain so he looked less dangerous. Thankfully the healing spa near LA had been miles away from Sunnydale so that one hadn't tried to cuddle him. Of course, it was Cleveland and his luck held. He walked out of the kitchen with a cup of chocolate laced coffee, finding Willow sobbing in a corner. "Hey." He sipped, staring down at her. "Should I go nag Kennedy for you again?"

"My parents," she said, looking up at him.

"Fuck 'em. They're idiots, Willow. You've known that for years."

"I tried to do something and nothing came out."

"You have it hidden after the mall last week." She moaned and undid that and sure enough things were floating. No more magic covering things up. She got up with his help and stomped out there to yell at her parents herself.

Xander leaned into the tv room. "The elder Rosenburgs are here." Buffy hopped up to go stop Willow from smiting her parents. He looked at the minis. "Willow's *real* upset, ladies. Don't yell too much tonight when she's reactiony and frantic. They do it to her each time they talk." He walked off calling some more support.

"Kennedy, your in-laws are here bothering your girlfriend. Yes, those parents. Here. Yes at the Council building," he agreed dryly. "I would before she destroys them." He looked outside. "She's got them penned in with two cars and a cab that's why, Kennedy." He hung up with a sigh, walking out there. "Willow, Kennedy said to calm down please. She didn't want to handle an emergency today."

"She won't have to," Willow promised, glaring at her parents.

He got between them. "Did I not vow to stop you if you ever got to that same point where you were going to destroy humanity?" he asked, finishing his coffee in a few gulps.

She huffed, glaring at him. "I'm not going to destroy anyone, Xander!"

"Yeah, bullshit. Go inside." He pointed. "Your parents are worthless nightmares, Willow. Always have been. Go. Shoo. Take Buffy and go calm down by eating cookies. Andrew made some for after dinner so he can probably make more." She stomped a foot. He stared back. "Now please. Before the press shows up to give their bigoted asses more attention." She pointed at the news van pulling in. "Uh-huh. I felt the slime showing up thanks to the battle senses. Go inside!" He pointed with a glare.

Giles came to the doorway. "Willow, do be a dear and go calm down," he said quietly. "Thank you, Buffy, please help her do so." She nodded, pulling Willow back inside. He looked at Xander. "You took a vow?"

"While nearly bleeding to death internally thanks to her." He grinned. "I heard tinkling little bells and everything."

"Oh, dear. Those are binding and may still hold you to it if you're not anywhere nearby."

"I'd be sent to deal with her. I used an owed wish to stop her redheaded dumb ass." He glared at the parents. "You two, who left your daughter alone for months, made that fragile, slightly psychotic young woman in there," he noted loudly. "Are you fucking proud of how you raised that girl? Really? Because what you did, most places would have social workers to stop you and your licenses yanked immediately.

"Especially with what I found in *my* social services file." The mother sneered but he stared back. "At least your trauma was enough to make her one of those comic book hero sorts. Though she does look bad in spandex. Your very fine genes and all that." He looked at the reporters staring at them. "What?"

"They're psychologists."

"Yes, and they've tried to burn their daughter at the stake. Then never apologized and never talked to her again. This is after a lifetime of ignoring her for *months* on end."

"I'm going to sue you!" Willow's mother screeched. "That's damaging my reputation."

Xander smirked. "It's not lying if we can prove it. We *do* have the records from Sunnydale to prove that, Mrs. Rosenburg." He grinned. "Hers, mine, everyone's." She backed up looking horrified. "The few social workers we had noted you as well but the Mayor thought you were a great diversion for him.

"Nearly as good as the vampires attacking the college by how he chuckled in his notes about you. Now, are you done here or not? Because I'm busy. I don't have time for you or for your daughter's meltdown since you showed up after *seven years*."

Buffy walked out and handed the reporter something. "Willow said to hand that to a real reporter not on Fox news." She walked off. "Xander, let's go before you sneer yourself into a Cordelia fit."

"She would've done it with fancier clothes but I think I can channel Queen C enough to do this one justice," he said dryly, staring at Willow's parents. "At least Joyce *apologized* for that possessed thing. You didn't even manage that." They stomped off. He grinned and wiggled his fingers at their backs. "Have a nice trip to whatever hell you crawled out of! I'm sure they'll throw a party that you're back!" He looked at the reporters. "I can see it, ask your one question."

"Possessed?"

Buffy grunted. "We had the Hansel and Gretel demon, the ones behind the fairytale, show up to go on an anti-witch crusade in town. My mom got hit first and started a group to end all the magic users. So me, Willow, and another witch nearly got burned at the stake but the demon got banished before they lit us on fire. My mom apologized.

"Willow's....changed the locks as soon as she had moved onto the college's campus. She had to break in to get the witch that was now a rat to get away from that and the rest of her stuff. Of course, they were in the Bahamas at some conference or another again. They were never there. In four years I saw them in town twice for about a week each."

Xander nodded. "They started that when Willow was four. Six days here, a week there, four days over a long weekend for a conference they were speaking at. Two weeks in second grade when she got chicken pox they were on GMA. The teacher demanded to know why her parents sent her to school while contagious. So she showed her on the room's tv."

A few reporters winced. "Yeah, they're not good parents. The animals that eat their young are better parents. It's done a number but Willow's been healing. Her girlfriends have been very helpful helping her see what a real family does for each other." He walked off. "Go away. It's nearly time for the girls to come home from school and you *know* how we feel about that." They backed off so they didn't catch any of the minis coming off the bus. A few had gotten sued by the minis for endangering their lives for that.

Buffy waved at the bus driver. "It's okay. They won't film them or we'll let the minis sue them again." The driver let them off so the girls could run inside. "Andrew's working on dinner and has veggies out for snacking, ladies. Go get one then start the homework carousel so you can do stretching and stuff after dinner."

They groaned but nodded. "Hey, two more days and it's holiday break! Then you get to work out with the bigger girls helping too." The girls giggled at that, it meant they got to pick on the older slayers. "And no one try to tickle Faith tonight please. She's got stomach cramps from lunch." She followed the last one inside.

Xander came out to look at the driver, who shrugged. He got the napping one, carrying her inside. "One's asleep already, Buffster." He kicked the door shut. She came to get that one to check over. They had gotten her backpack and not the girl so that was fine.

The reporters were talking about that with their home bases. They agreed with the girls that homework time sucked and tickling the senior slayer Faith was probably fun for them. They got to watch one of the older girls take the minis out back after dinner too. She gathered them all and then grinned. "Oooh, get me, I'm a scary monster sort!" she squealed and ran off. The girls chased her around the yard to pounce her.

Buffy was watching and giggling. She came out. "Most scary monster sorts we deal with aren't single ones," she chirped and the girls broke off some to try to grab her too. Xander came out with a sigh and the younger girls who weren't school aged yet. He bent down to talk to them then let them join in. They went to trip Buffy for the older ones and then got the other senior girl.

Faith came out to get pounced too and they enjoyed that. The one that tried to get Xander down he picked up, swung around a few times, then tossed her at the other girls to catch, making her giggle. "Sometimes the monsters are really tall and you have to climb," Buffy agreed, trying to pounce Xander. He got out of the way and kicked her on the butt, sending her at the minis to pounce some more. "Hey!"

"Sometimes the scary monsters have to take out the ones doing plans to do their own," he quipped with an evil smirk. "Girls, Andrew's got cookies for those who won!" They got all three of the slayers down and groaning from the tickle attacks then went to pounce Andrew to grab the cookies while a few held him away from them so he couldn't stop them. They ran off with all the cookies and Andrew's baseball hat - one girl had wanted it for weeks now.

"That was eight dozen cookies and there's only sixteen of you so share them before you become bouncy horrors that we'll rename after Xander," Andrew called.

Xander smirked at the staring slayers. "Have fun! I'm off tonight!" He strolled off to go clubbing.

Buffy moaned. "Evil asshole," she called after him. The other two moaned as they got up and went to try to steal some of the cookies back. "Hey, share the cookies. Sometimes you can bribe the scary monsters into going away. And we deserve some with how much you girls bruised us."

The reporters got all that on camera and the parents among them were laughing at that evil idea that Harris had used. Sixteen bouncy young girls high on cookies? Yes, that was definitely evil. At least they weren't in a mall.

***

Xander was tired of the huffy archeologist asshole who was saying they were all liars. So he was going to do something about it. He walked into where he was giving a speech and up to him, holding up a map and an artifact. "Here, this will get you into one of the oldest demon cities on this continent." He smirked a bit. "You're welcome to join me there in a few days. I have something to do between then and now but I'll be there in five days." He walked off again looking smug.

"Harris," one of the reporters called. "Where is it and can reporters come?"

"I've barely found it, identified two of the temples, and killed the guardian," he called back as he walked out the doors. "Give it a bit to make it safer please."

"Okay," she decided, looking at her fellow reporters then up at the talking head on the stage. "What city is that?"

"I doubt it's a demon city," he sneered. "They just grunt and point."

One of the demons in the audience stood up. "No, the three species that grunt and point are due to language barriers. Theirs is very musical and hard to hear at your average range of hearing," he noted. "Is that Maridal?" He came up to look at the map himself since the man was so horrified that an actual demon had spoken to him.

"Oh, that's not Maridal." He smiled at the group listening. "That is the ancient city of Cardeza-Lovair as the person renamed it in the sixteen hundreds. It had been found once before but the people who did were made to forget before all this came out back then and we *all* had to face an inquisition." He handed the map back with a smile. Then he took a picture of it. "Been wanting to visit that one myself with my students."

"Who're you?" the guy asked in a squeaky voice.

"I'm the head of the humanities program at the University of Cairo's demon portion. That means I'm over the sociologists, the anthropologists, and the few who want to go into your field but couldn't get into the regular program. Demon and not really as the one over the human portion is on maternity leave."

He strolled off happily. "I have to see if Harris has a map to Maridal. I know he was there. That guardian spell sends out an SOS if a human comes near it." He left to go get happy. That night he did have an emailed map from Xander, who said he had heard the request through a reporter writing him for a copy of the map. And a map to an unknown city of demonic origins that still had a few persistent beings living there.

That made his week and would make his career when he announced it. He and his assistant, and favorite students of course, went there to see what was going on. They could announce that and make the wannabe archeologists in his program get enough notice to get them to the proper college and programs. The anthropologists were happy too, they got to study a living ancient culture that was slowly dying.

***

Willow saw that event and sighed in pain. "Oh. That's going to cause a stink. That guy hates that demons exist, much less that they were here first." The slayers with her nodded at that. "Oh, they're going to try to hunt the Xander. I hope he's got someone to protect him this time."

Giles walked in. "What? I heard you moaning about Xander." She looked online to get a full copy of that talk that had been interrupted by their watcher. He watched then moaned. "Oh, that city!"

"Yes, that city. Is that the one he gave to the Asian watcher's dad?"

"No, that was the one Dr. Havaran mentioned, Willow. He was most pleased too. Announced the find and produced pictures. I'm sure Dr. Havaran will be pleased to help him though." He handed the tablet back to go tell the other watchers what Xander had done. It may mean some academics were nicer to them.

"What about the ancient alien guys?" one of the younger slayers asked.

Willow snorted. "That guy with the hair has a bachelor's degree in something like physiology or something. Nothing humanities related. He's just a head that spouts bullcrap." The girls nodded at that. "Though we showed him what we knew and he had a true fit about it not being aliens, it being demons."

She shrugged. "Maybe they'll make that show factual." She changed the channel to something nicer for the girls to watch that was still a bit educational. She didn't want them to fall into Buffy's trap of a daily soap opera binge.

***

Xander grinned at the archeologist, two reporter types, and a few students. "Guys, the two red buildings have not been cleared of threats. They will kill you, and possibly everyone, if you walk into them. We're negotiating with the things holding the temples safe."

He waved a hand at the reporters. "Hey, guys. It's still a bit dangerous. Oh, and there's a landmine about ten feet outside the gate to the right." He pointed. "I don't know from when." They nodded, coming in to take pictures. "So, welcome to an ancient demon city, one of the oldest on the continent." He grinned at the professor. "Want the temple library that has maps first?"

"It's that well preserved?" he demanded.

"Not fully. The map's ratty and about to fall apart. I put it onto the stone tablet I found in there so it'd hold any moisture away from it and not eat the papyrus. There's a few more in tatters and a few newer looking ones. There had been inhabitants here, a few priests, until about the thirteen hundreds, I'd say about the middle of it. I can't always convert that calendar right."

He led them to it. "That is a dangerous spot," he warned. "Leave the two red temples alone please. At least until I can make them safe to look inside." The student came back to go with the group. Xander let them into the temple, bowed at the altar, then went into the side hallway to the library.

"This temple was to Maranathor. He's a male harvest god for tree fruits on one realm. He's also the brother of D'Nar. Who lives down south." The reporters looked at him. He grinned. "That goddess that smacked the living hell out of her former boyfriend? That's D'Nar." They just nodded and he grinned.

"She's a great lady. I adore that woman. She helps the minis with planting ideas too. One was having a badish harvest year so the mini asked her how to better fertilize to make sure it didn't happen again. D'Nar was *so* nice to help her with that."

He watched the students look around and one sneeze into his shirt at some dust instead of on the dust, which was polite of him. Xander pulled down the map scroll on the stone. "This is the city's map. That language is an ancient trading tongue so it's fairly still in use."

The archeologist looked then at him. "That's an actual language!"

"Yeah! There's like ninety demon languages that show up down here." He grinned. "Trade languages, like latin, were to bridge the gap to give them a common language to use. There's six present trade languages in use as far as I know. I can read all but one and speak four of them because it's helped me protect them and humanity."

He shrugged but smiled a bit. "There's always been languages. Even the ones that grunt and point, they have it specially meaning certain things, which I believe makes it a language." He strolled off. "C'mon, guys. There's a nice garden out back with some odd plants and I have to pick three for D'Nar. She asked." They followed, taking film of the inside of the temple.

"Is this to a dead god, Mr. Harris?"

He grinned. "Not in the least. He's asleep. There's a few versions of why but it's one of those myths that each part has a bit of truth but not all of it. I've heard two of the most related ones but you'd have to ask D'Nar or someone about the reality. I haven't. I know he's asleep in a specially sealed and protected area. There's a few of those."

They nodded. He showed them around the garden, letting them see him unplanting a few plants to put into nearby pots with some soil from around it. And one he shot a mouse and buried it underneath the roots. "I think that's the one she said needed decomposing materials." He went to put them in the main temple area on the steps out so he could send them off later.

A pretty, tall woman in a gauzy dress showed up. She had bluer skin and white hair, and really pretty decorated nails with seed pearls and gold. He grinned. "Lady D'Nar, I was going to send them via messenger." He held up one. "Is this the one you said needed decomp? If not, I can go get another sample for you since there's three in the meditation garden."

"No, dear, that does need it." She patted him on the cheek with a smile. "You're a flirt."

"I try." He grinned. "You're awesome enough to be flirted with but not dangerous enough to be attracted to me."

"Not often anyway." She kissed him on the cheek then wiped her lipstick off. "Thank you, Xander." She took her plants and looked up at the statue behind the altar. "My brother was such an idiot sometimes." She sighed.

"Can we ask you about the myth, Lady D'Nar?" one of the reporters asked.

She smiled. "If you catch me when I'm morose and remembering the family things, dear." She disappeared with her plants.

"Her family remembrance is in November," Xander told them quietly. "She and I had a lot of wine last year so she could safely mope and remember them." They nodded at that. "She is a super lady and her temple's healers are great too. Did great stitches for me a few times when I defended the temple against humans."

He bowed at the altar again then led them to the other side of the temple, letting them see the more modern areas. One squealed at the books, bringing a student. He looked and moaned. Xander grinned. "These are more modern ones and I don't read or speak most of the languages in here. Sorry."

"Professor, there's a more modern library with other languages," he called. His teacher came running and stared in awe. "When was this built?"

"By the stone there, it says 1289." He pointed at it. "So probably right before they died of some sort of disease. One left a journal." He walked over and carefully lifted it down with his shirt around his hand. He put it onto the table. "The last priest in the city." They bent over it.

"That's in a Latin hybrid that someone created to merge a trade tongue I don't read or speak with latin for trading purposes. The only one who reads that is the one who talked to you at that speech." He grinned. "His brother's a linguist working on all the trade tongues."

"I'll ask him," he said, looking up. "This...." He stood up straighter. "These could have been done by early humans."

Xander shook his head, pulling down another book with his shirt. "The beginning of their God coming over here from his own realm." He let him have that one. "D'Nar followed ages later because their people were going into a civil war of hell. It destroyed their whole realm."

The man looked at it then moaned. "Is that talking about proto-humans?" he demanded, looking at him.

Xander looked then pointed. "That's the first slayer, Sineya. She was a brow ridge having young woman in a clan who the gifts were forced upon to defend the proto-humans from demons." He smiled. "There was a battle city nearby at that time. Humans were seen like prey species today."

The professor slumped. "When was this written?"

Xander shrugged. "I have no idea. Looks like it's a rewrite by the first page though. Since it mentions the original was on a scroll that was falling apart." He looked and moaned, almost whining. Xander grinned at the reporters. "I'll show you guys where I've set up tents. It's by the back well that still has some water, and nicely has an outhouse latrine structure that still works." He led them back there, giving them the tour of the ancient city's marketplace and what would've sold there.

"Is that a communal toilet like Rome's baths?" one asked.

"Yes." Xander nodded. "This city didn't believe in spreading waste around so everyone just used here. Chamber pots were only if you were very ill. Everyone in town rushed in here to do their stuff then left so it didn't contaminate the wells or ground water." They nodded, going to film in there too.

"Why is there a shallow basin area?"

"For the ones like the Groers. They eliminate by basically creating a ball that comes out of their structure with any waste in it." He let them see their facts on the watcher's database. "Like them."

They read it and nodded. That was weird but okay. They were demons; they didn't have human counterparts always.

Xander heard a giggle. "Oh, shit. Stay." He looked out there. "Get away from the pink thing!" he called. "It's a Loli and they'll kill you! It takes puncturing, not firing weapons! Don't inhale the gas either!" He went to get a sword and handle it for that student.

"Dude, you nearly got inserted and used as a sex toy so it could split off and then you'd be eaten. Go get fresh air, calm down, and have the headache I know you have." The student wobbled but Xander got him to the tents then went to tell the professor that before hunting the rest of that pack. There was rarely only one of them.

***

Slayers Katya and Faith were helping the demon archeology team in their ancient city. But there was a huge problem. They had somehow woken up a God. A very not happy with humans God. The professor was hiding with his students. Katya was glaring at him. "I'm going to summon Xander," she decided.

"X can't handle him," Faith complained. "And he's too far away!"

She called Willow. "We need Xander. We woke up a God." She hung up at the god's glare. "What?" she demanded. "At least he's a male so you can sneer in your own language."

Xander appeared, presently a bloody mess with goo on him. He had his axe in his hand and a sword on his back. "Ladies, I was in the middle of protecting the others from a colony of Loli's." He handed Faith and Katya his sword. "Go for it for me! There's reporters." They got sent back by the witches. He glared at the demon king. "What?" he demanded. "It's a dead city! They're studying it to see how magnificent you were! If you don't like it, take a pill and go back to sleep for a few more centuries."

"You're an uppity human."

"Ooooh, yay," Xander said dryly. "Go me!"

"That's a war god, Harris," the professor called.

Xander looked at him oddly. "I know that. I know where his other temple is. I blew it the fuck up to keep that portal in it closed last year." He grinned. Then at the war god. "So." He smirked a bit. "Welcome back to humanity. It's 2009. Or 64,589 in the Koranth calendar if I'm not mistaken."

"Day 56 of 66,589, Harris," the professor called.

"Okay, I stand corrected by the person who'd know best." He smiled. "He's the top archeologist on this continent."

"My people are not dead!"

"Your people have been dead for *centuries*," Xander assured him. "You can try to summon any priests you may still have. I think one's somehow managed to be immortal. He's with Nort's temple."

The demon king blinked a few times. "What?"

Xander video called with a sigh. He waved. "It's Xander. I need the immortal asshole to talk to his former God please, Healer Batheres."

"Why would that God be awake, Xander?" Xander switched the view to show him. "Oh, bloody hell!"

Xander switched it back with a grin. "Wouldn't hell have to be bloody in places? I think it's part of the whole concept, isn't it? And have I mentioned you remind me of Spike now and then recently?" The healer snorted, looking displeased but he did call for that one.

Xander walked over. "Here, this is a communication device called a smart phone. This is a video conferencing app that lets you talk to someone somewhere else while seeing them instead of just hearing them. It's like scrying for people without magic."

The priest stepped into view. "My Lord, you slept very long. Why did you wake now?"

"Dr. Havaran is here to look at the city," Xander said, leaning over his arm to wave. "I've got the other one in the other city but we have Loli's. Here, we had Katya and Faith. We switched." He grinned.

"That explains why you're so messy, Harris."

"A whole *colony* of Loli's under a temple. They had taken over the temple to Bravat." The healer moaned, shaking his head. "Yeah! With reporters, archeos, and me. Though the two temples that are still dangerous were very amused." He got out of the way, looking at the geeks.

"I should see if the temple here to D'Nar's brother has that other plant she was looking for." He wiped off some slime then bent to get some sand to scrape it off him. "That's slightly better I guess." He scrubbed with the sand until he was handed back his phone. "Thanks." He put it into his pocket. "So, nap time again?"

"I...." He huffed. "Many things have happened."

"Dude, you so missed *everything*. The people around here are just getting their own peoples back from colonization and rebuilding their traditions and stuff. If you're staying you have to be peaceful or I have to blow you the fuck up, but if you're willing to stay peaceful, leave the people studying your greatness alone, and maybe help if we have another invasion attempt, then stay awake for all I care." He shrugged. "I'm the guy training the slayers down here so they can stay at home."

The demon king looked at him. "Why is there more than one?"

"First Evil."

"Oh." Xander pulled up the information for him, letting him read it. He grimaced. "That witch...."

"It was prompted we think. The Powers That Be," he said quietly.

"I get that." He handed the phone back again. "I will stay awake and not bother the ones who wish to study this city as it has very few living things and they're senseless."

"Are there those snifflers? I could use some against the Loli's," Xander said. The god summoned some. He grinned. "You won't hurt the geeks, right?"

"No." He waved a hand. "I knew of ones who studied before." He walked over there, looking at them. "You are safe from me as long as you are respectful. Perhaps I'll restart my city."

"If not, D'Nar has a few who live near her," Xander offered. "They have tea and things. Their handmaidens are in a coven together." He grinned. "And D'Nar's a great lady. Nort lives about three hundred miles from there too. So you could visit your former priest."

"That is not a bad idea. I do not have means to get there." He frowned at the stables. "All my beasts have died."

Xander held up a hand and dug something out of his pocket to look something up then showed it to the geeks. Who one nodded and called someone. That trader showed up to bow to the demon king and talk to him about what he'd need and what he had left to trade for more modern things like a traveling beast.

Xander got sent back to his city of little rolling pink things that giggled and ate people. He released the snifflers. Those demons sniffed the Lolis and were enranged, growing and inhaling them to eat them like ants. It helped a lot before Faith fell to them. "I heard that factoid a few years back from a book I won at a poker game," he called with a wave and a grin. He stabbed another Loli. "Ah, another fun day of slaying."

Faith scowled at him. "You consider this funsies?"

"I'm going to be horny as fuck from the gas later, so yes, once I get cleaned up I plan on celebrating surviving." He grinned. "I say we send some to people we don't like so they can have samples to study. See how far it gets in the CIA."

Katya laughed, shaking her head. "That's mean, Xander, but I like it!"

"None of us can teleport things," Faith reminded them. "And it'd make them hate us and try to attack the minis again."

"Lolis won't touch kids. They don't have sex hormones yet." He grinned. The slayers groaned but they finished eliminating the menace to survival then sighed and went to scrub the goo off before it made them smell like one.

Katya looked. "Xander, one of the younger ones is coming out of the red temple on the right," she called.

Xander looked. "He's probably a zombie," he announced. "If so, behead him to kill him. I need to sharpen my blades." The geeks all moaned but he was a zombie and Faith did behead him to take him out. "I warned him," he noted at the heated stares his way. "Did I not warn about that repeatedly?" They nodded and went back to studying things.

Xander stopped one. "That is the town's cemetery." He pointed. "Do not bother that or the guardian will come back." They nodded, only taking pictures then leaving it alone. They had no need to dig that up right now. The witches sent the slayers back to their former city so Xander got to rest for now.

"We could use some help bringing up water," one of the students called.

Xander looked over. "I'm recovering from the battle, kid." He pouted but nodded, doing it himself. Xander sighed, going back to his sharpening. He'd probably need his axe again within hours thanks to them bothering those temples.

***
Part 4 by Voracity2
Xander looked at one of the remaining temple's guardian spells. "If you summon one more thing for me to fight I'm going to blow the whole city up. Then you won't have to worry about this temple."

"They're humans!"

"Yes, we are."

The guardian spirit scowled at him. "You are not!"

"I was, I just got exposed to a few things." He gave him a pointed look. "If you want the demonic archeologist team so much, they're bothering the Temple of Drevt. Go talk to them. Until then, these guys are archeologists too, even though they're human, and they're telling everyone in both communities what they found here." He looked over his shoulder at the altar then at the spirit again. "I should put that somewhere safer. Like in a vault."

"Humans can't touch that."

Xander waved a hand at himself. "Exposed to mermaids and demon blood a few times, dude."

"Point." He looked back then at him. "There is worse in here. The ones in that other city are nicely demonic but it would harm them as well."

"There's the guy in Egypt since that's clearly Egyptian. He could probably have it hidden."

The guardian spirit winced. "Still a human."

"I'm pretty sure he's got a demon working for him by now. They're still trying to cover up the sorcerers' temples. If I was being chaotic I'd go stand in a certain valley and let the hellmouth taint out on it to expose things."

The spirit sighed. "They may like that, they may not. Not sure. You should try that. That way we can eliminate the threat."

"The ones with the cameras, they're reporters. They've sent back pictures of how pretty your people made this whole city." The spirit looked confused. "Those black things? Those are cameras. They take pictures, or in their case film, of things that can then be shown to others later. Like a painting that moves."

"Oh. I saw that in those books."

"Not exactly the same and who had HP here?"

"There's been a priestess who kept trying to get into the other temple."

Xander nodded. "I can help with that too."

"He would be very mad."

Xander grinned. "And? He's dead!"

"He's not fully dead. He's in there somewhere."

Xander stared at him. "They burned his body."

"That was his brother's body. He's hiding in there."

"Oh. Interesting. Call that priestess and I'll help her."

"I'd have to summon something else if you did."

Xander grinned. "I've got stuff for that now." The spirit pouted. Xander called around and found that priestess, who came over as quickly as she could. He walked out to meet her. "Annual pilgrimage?"

"Hunter Harris?" she asked, looking confused.

"I'm the training watcher for the baby slayers down here so they can stay at home, dear."

"We cannot talk to watchers, Hunter."

He grinned. "Sure. I get that. What did you need out of that temple? The other temple's guardian spirit said he's in here hiding."

"I need the urn and the prayer set on the altar."

"Okay. We can do that. Do you have a way to carry them? A box or something?" She slowly shook her head. "Let's get one from the students then. We have student archeologists and one who thought all demons just grunted."

"We saw that amusing taunting. Are they still alive?"

"Yes, because I'm fantastic. We even dealt with the Loli invasion since a temple had a whole colony nesting." She shuddered. "Yeah. A fertility temple at least so it made absurd sense." He grinned, taking her to get a box. "She needs a box to get a prayer set off one of those temples for hers. Can she bum one?" One of the students handed one over and he put hay in it to pad things. "Thanks, dude. I'll let you know if that one's open later." He took her in there.

"We cannot pass the guardian," she reminded him.

"We've been talking for weeks now." The spirit sighed so Xander did his next-to-last thing on his list of how to deal with spirits in his way, he let it be sucked into him. Then he fought it out. The spirit fled with a shriek of horror. Xander waved. "Bye! Go back to your peace and rest please. I promise the hyena won't eat you." He opened the door for her, then waved a hand. "After you, priestess."

She walked in carefully and moaned in pleasure. "It is still purified." She bowed and said a prayer then got what she needed. There was still a protection around the urn. Xander dropped holy water on it then regular water, making it shatter. She gathered up the prayer set to pack up. She turned and squeaked loudly. "Oh, I'm sorry, Sire! We gather this for your other temple!" She properly bowed as deeply as she could.

Xander grinned and waved. "I'm helping her get in here to get things that their temple needs."

"Which uppity human are you?"

"Harris." He grinned. "Training watcher over the mini slayers on this continent so they can stay at home."

The demon god glared. "Why are you not human?"

"I was exposed to a lot of stuff over the years. I was born human."

The demon god glared. "I do not like you. My guardian spirit was to keep such as you and those wandering around out. You've disturbed my rest. A lot." He sat on his throne. "What other temple needs my altar set, child?"

She looked up. "The temple in Baswait, Sire. I'm a junior priestess there."

"To which one?"

"I serve your wife, Sire."

"Oh. The second wife I'm assuming?" She nodded slowly. "She did not get that in the divorce."

"She claims to protect it since you were burned alive, Sire."

"No, my brother did that." He waved a hand. "I'll talk to my ex-wife soon. You can have her urn with her spawn of a mother if you want it. The thing nags. Constantly." He glared at it then at Xander. "Why do humans know about us?"

"Someone exposed the communities. The demonic community, the magical community, everything." The god huffed at that. "The ones here thought that demons were basically higher level animals. Only grunted and pointed. This let them know how great some of the former societies are." He grinned. "And if you're thinking about Nort, he's a great guy. I know where his temple is if you want a map."

"No, my former high priest will show up eventually, when he's not busy healing someone." He stared at the priestess. "Which did she truly want to covet this time? Before it was the bowl."

"She wanted me to gather the bowl, the dagger, and the chalice set, Sire. Plus her mother's urn."

"If she wants the chalice set, she'll have to fight me for it," he said dryly. "And she'd lose. I inherited those." He stared at the human in the doorway. "What? My ex-wife is annoying." He looked at her. "You can bring her the dagger as a sign that she should use it on her own wrists, child. Her and her *voice*, which is the most annoying thing next to sand fleas, could use the knife to ritually bring something better to this realm."

"Her sister tried that. I blew them up, and nearly myself," Xander quipped. "Then the rest got fought off by a few human militaries."

The god blinked at him. "What now?"

Xander grinned and nodded. "The one they call Marti because they can't pronounce her name? That one. I had to blow up the portal and the field of battle, then the humans got the rest."

"They have more than swords?"

Xander grinned and nodded. "Yes we do. As all my slayers are tiny, I'm their protector as well."

The god huffed. "That's dumb."

"They're babies. They deserve to grow up happy."

"I have no problem with that." He flicked a hand. "All children should be able to grow up happy." He looked at the priestess. "Give me a minute to dig out the other bowl so she'll leave me alone." He went to do that. She carefully packed the urn and knife in the box, then the bowl he handed over. "Tell her if she's not satisfied, she'll have to remarry me and then divorce me again to win it in the agreements." She bowed and nodded. "You are quite a nice priestess. I should steal you."

She blinked up at him. "My mother promised me to her when I was born, Sire."

"Pity. I could use some new priests since my last one fled." He glared at Xander. Who grinned. "How did you do that?"

"I suck in spirits? It met my first one, which was a primal."

"Oh. Damn it." He grimaced. "Begone, human."

"Can the geeks look in your library for history books? They don't believe you were here first," Xander said.

"I don't care much for history but I have something on an event." He went to look and came back, handing it to the human in the doorway. "Shoo!" He fled. "Hey, an obedient human." He smiled. "Finally!"

Xander snorted. "He's young." He led the priestess out. "Thanks. And I banished the Loli's from your daughter's temple. Damn messy things."

The god shuddered. "I hate those things she adored. Pink glitter and they stink." He went back to his hiding and napping spot, laying back down. He did seal the temple so no one else could get in. And he summoned something to deal with the uppity humans. He felt it appear and the fear it caused then he heard laughter so went to check. He got to see the demon be blown up by a weapon of some kind. "Are those the siege engines they were talking about?"

Xander grinned and shook his head. "No. Those are for sieges at buildings. This is for assholes who show up and try to get flirty with me. It's artillery. Or in this case it's a Somali grenade launcher. I won it in a poker game." He beamed. "Very handy."

The god looked at the remains then nodded. "I can see why. Are those common?"

"With militaries," the priestess said. "They have many higher weapons, Sire."

"Damn."

"D'Nar has your second-youngest son near her," Xander offered. "You could visit him. The others went to Rambari."

"I may do that. Is he finally over his lust over that human girl?"

Xander shook his head. "She had herself changed into a Gorgon to be with him for eternity."

The god groaned, shaking his head. "At least he doesn't have to look at her ears any longer." He resealed his temple and went to visit his son and daughter-in-law. She was veiled but only bowed to him. "I got woken up by *humans*," he said, sounding disturbed.

His son smiled. "Harris is enough to wake up any god, Father." He got up to hug him. "He made the fighting over a priestess war stop by making her squeal for him instead so they'd all leave her alone. It ended a century of war."

"He banished the guardian spirit." He sat down with a huff. "So I see she is worthy after all." His son nodded, smiling at his wife. Who clearly was pleased back. "Fine." He waved a hand. "I'll agree to the union as it's lasted this long." They smiled at him. "Do I have grandchildren?"

"No," she said. "Not yet. It is still too soft to hatch."

"Pity. I'll have to deal with his last stepmother soon too. She sent a priestess to loot the altar set she didn't get in the divorce." His son gave him something to drink and settled in to talk to him.

Xander grinned at the priestess, who was blushing. "Go home, dear. You're too sweet and nice to be here." She nodded, taking the crate with her. He looked at the student archeologists, who all shrugged and got back to work. "That temple's probably sealed up."

"Probably," the one with the book agreed. "What is this about?"

Xander looked. "The gladiator battle for the next-to-last demon king's holder." He handed it back. "Apparently they battled for the highest spot. Or to get out of the highest spot maybe." He went to put the artillery tube up. "The other temple's still sealed."

"Yes, sir." He looked at his professor, who was having his mind blown every few hours. He was almost quiet and slumped now that all this had been done by demons before humans could create fire. When the demon archeologist and his team showed up that night, as planned, those two sat down to talk about things. It helped the human one quite a lot. Though that demonic archeologist did swat Xander for being such an asshole. Xander just shrugged with a grin.

***

Xander called the witches in Devon. "It's Xander. I need two trips, one's seriously important to get a few artifacts into a safe vault. No, I meant a safe vault. I've got one holding the remains of Queen Perisis. I know it's a myth but it's not. I'm holding it and it's chatty. No, then I need to come back here and gather stuff to go to Egypt to a certain location.

"I can drive part of the way but the artifact will leak until it gets back to Egypt. Thanks." He hung up and sat on the crate, holding onto the chatty box. He appeared in Cleveland. "SCRAVNER!" he bellowed. That watcher came running. Xander stood up. "Box'o artifacts from the city? All possessed or magical. And this is the remains of Perisis."

"She's a myth!"

"She's a mess! She's also flirty and tried to claim I'd be her husband and breed her." He held it up with a grimace. "We all know I'm infertile and she's not evil enough to be mine. So please stick her somewhere quiet she can pout?"

He took the box, letting it speak to him. "Oh hell, Harris!"

Xander shrugged. "I didn't want to dick that down. She's pouty about that. Put her somewhere in a corner?"

"Fine. The others?" Xander smirked and handed over the list from the top of the box. Then he texted so he could disappear. He read it. "What the bloody hell is that! Where was that boy working!" he bellowed.

"With the human archeologist guy," Willow called from the library. "Showing him that demons weren't grunting, pointing animals. Dr. Havaran praised him for working so well and protecting that city as well as the student archeologists. She came to the doorway. "There had been a colony of Lolis at least."

Scravner shuddered. "That's disgusting." He took his new box and new crate to the safe vault area to log them in and start their research. When Giles came in he handed him the box of former Goddess. "She tried to mate with Harris."

"Yes, she's probably not dirty enough for him," Giles said blandly. "Who was it?"

"Perisis."

"Then no, she's said to be sweet." He put the box down and patted Scravner on the shoulder. "At least you didn't have to help that mission to stop the archeologists from fussing."

"I would've went mad. I'm a *normal* man, Rupert. Unlike Harris."

"Which is why he does so good down there." He left him to it. That inventory list was most amusing, full of things he wanted to be nowhere near.

***

Xander got sent to the valley in Egypt he needed, walking over to the head archeologist in Egypt. "Hey." He shook his hand. "First, this is your people's. It's been leaking until I brought it back by Anwar. It was stuffed in a closet in a demonic city down south." He handed it over.

"That is in Hieroglyphs," he said, reading it. "A temple of Venus but she was far after...."

"Probably the demonic verison, not the Greek and Roman one," Xander said with a nod. "Her temple's in that same city I just got that one archeologist out of." He walked off with a sigh. "I got asked by the demonic community to open something for you." He concentrated and removed his blocking necklace, letting the energy out. There was a whole lot of answering glow back.

"All those are semi- or partially demonic court sorcerers. From the Temple of Nuit's hidden people I'm told." The man moaned but nodded. Xander grinned. "They wanted them to be honored and known too. Apparently one's a mythical hero for telling a pharaoh no about something." He shrugged but handed over the book.

"Dviont sent that. We exposed he was hiding instead of dead. Which meant his second ex-wife got mad at her attempt to kill him with his brother's help failed. She had been bragging for centuries but he proved her wrong. So he was missing his last ex-wife." He pointed at the book with a grin. "He'd like it if you found it and made sure she's actually dead. He said she nags."

"I can do that. Thank you, Mr. Harris."

Xander grinned. "I learned a lot watching the specials you've put out. Besides, this way you can freak out people too." He smirked. "I find it a lot of fun to do that to the really stuffy people like the one I was just guarding in an ancient demon city. Dr. Havaran also enjoyed it."

"I've met him. He is most interesting."

"He's working on the oldest demonic full city on the continent with some of his students." He grinned. "He's most happy right now."

"I'm sure he is. Thank you."

"Welcome." He looked at one temple then put back on the necklace. "They have something in that one that likes hellmouth energy." He pointed. "Please make sure I can't get near it again? It's bad enough the hellmouths like to snuggle me like I'm a teddy human." The archeologist laughed but nodded. "Have a great dig, sir." He grinned and left.

The Doctor looked back at his people, who came down to mark areas to dig. One carefully took the book and vase to store for him in a hidden part of the museum's back room. He would have to write the watchers to tell them how weird yet delightful that young one was to give them new finds.

***

Xander walked into D'Nar's temple, bowing at her. "I found odd specimens to gift you with. One's dangerous, and a bit cannibal. The other three are just pretty. And one's from inside a hellmouth."

She blinked a few times. "Something grows in them?" He went to grab the crate and brought it in, handing her the first one. "This will definitely eat a being." She put it carefully aside, patting it on the head. "I'll use it in the defenses."

"I figured you'd give it to your aunt." He smirked. "She tried to flirt with me too."

"You are adorable."

"Yes, and part of her is in a box I put in the vault in Cleveland."

She moaned. "I heard, Xander. That's mean."

"She's the one who wanted Xander kids."

"Oooh. Well, she'll reform when she makes her way out of that box."

"I did only use a cardboard box and tape, but she's in the artifact vault in Cleveland, right near her ex-boyfriend."

"Awww. That's sweet of you." She took the next pant herself. "Oooh, that's fruit bearing but it's tiny."

"I planted a seed by stepping on it. Within a day it grew that. Nort's temple healer said it's important to Hadi."

"It is. It's her special plant." She put it on her altar with a pat. "I'll let her know I have a new one. Where did you find her fruit? It's not available down here."

He grinned and handed her the last piece he had. "From a marketplace. It crossbred with a papaya tree." She looked and whined but put it near the plant. He grinned. "I found one crossed with a lemon, which is where that seed came from. I didn't realize it was special until someone yelled at me for being a human eating sacred fruits. But he was insulting so I buried the core and stepped on that seed."

She nodded. "That can happen. I'm sure she wouldn't mind."

"No clue. One of your cousin's priestesses yelled."

"She's uptight."

Xander nodded. "Very." He handed over the next two. "Weird versions of ones you were looking for?"

She looked and moaned. "Oh, that's the pure version instead of the crossbreed. Where?"

"Nort's temple. I was weeding his back garden while he worked on Sal's injuries. There had been a few humans. I was a bit mad at the mess I made rescuing her. So I weeded while she got stitches so she didn't have to see me being mad at the humans." He gave her a look then smiled.

"By the way, he wanted your daughter too. So she's now safe." He pulled out the last pot and tossed the box into the fireplace to burn it. She stared at the pot of dirt. He moved his hellmouth necklace. The crystal flower suddenly appeared from being invisible and bloomed. "What is this? It was inside the edge of the hellmouth in Nigeria."

She came to look then backed up shaking her head. "That's evil."

"Okay, how do I kill it and should we check the others for one?" He put his necklace back into place so the flower would quit reacting. "Is it a fire, a blow it up, a magic against thing? And do you want to note it so you can spread around news that one appeared?"

"Yes, I'd like to tell the others. Let me get some. I have no idea how to kill it but I cannot touch it to sense it." Xander nodded, putting a glass jar over the top of the flower pot for now. A few other garden goddesses showed up. "Xander has found a few things. Hadi, that is your plant and your fruit that crossbred." She squealed, going to look. She stared at the carnivorous one, moving it carefully away from her. "Was that one near that flower, Xander?"

"No. That also came from Nort's back garden. It was by the pond. I'm guessing the pond used to have fish. I thought you might like a self defense plant." He grinned. "Ladies, and Sire. I found this inside the edge of the hellmouth in Nigeria." He pointed then moved his necklace to expose the plant again. "How do we kill it? Could there be more?"

"Those are dangerous to even humans," the male one said, staring at it. Xander put his necklace back in place. "They grow in energy rich places and suck up the energy."

"Okay. Should I warn the Devon coven or Willow?" They all nodded. So he called, walking off then coming back with Willow and another witch. "Ladies, I found this inside the Nigerian hellmouth." He let them see the flower.

"I remember one of those growing in Sunnydale right after the mayor died," Willow said. "Buffy stepped on it and I pouted about it because it was pretty and rare. What does it do?"

"Draws energy to it suck up and radiate," the male harvest god said. The others came over to look at it and tell them what it was and how to deal with it.

"Killed by fire, sword, smooshing, or blowing up? Or magic?" Xander asked.

"We're not sure," Hadi, who was a native demon garden goddess, admitted. "We've only heard stories of it, Xander." She looked at him. "What did you do? I usually barely feel you."

"I picked up some fruit from a market and someone's priestess yelled that one was sacred," he said with a point at that goddess. "But she was snotty and I had already eaten it so I kicked up some dirt and planted most of the core. That plant came from the seed I stepped on. It came up in about a day. The other one is from the same seller, who said your special plant crossbred."

She hummed, sniffing it. "Oh, that's delightful. I must see if that means they can grow down here." She looked at her new plant. "What did that one cross with?"

"Lemons."

"Awww. That would be a nice taste together."

"Tasted like lemon curd pie." He grinned. "I was hungry, it was breakfast. Sorry if that upsets you though."

"No, you cannot help it if you did not realize. And it's nice you're so good to us, dear." She patted him on the cheek. "What did Perisis want?"

"Xander babies," he said dryly. "She's in a box in a vault near her ex-boyfriend. Or maybe Kurt."

The goddesses all moaned that name and nodded. Perisis would adore being laid by the ultimate God of Pleasures. "When did we get him?" Willow demanded, looking at Xander funny.

"When he wanted me to be his cocksucking baby mama. I totally flipped him over, made him beg, and then offered him a chance to go teach the girls sex ed." He grinned. "Giles got mad at that so put him in a vault."

"Oh, that one. Yeah, I remember him." She sighed. "He was good at factual information." She shook her head but was smiling.

The witch looked at her. "Really, Willow?"

"Hey, I'm not getting any! He was very good at saving me finding a good girl talk for the girls. And he had a really smutty mind that used to give me great dreams." The witch sighed but patted her on the arm. "So how do we deal with these things, guys? Can I magically suck them dry maybe?"

"Only if you want to die from radiation," Hadi said. "Xander couldn't even do that, Willow." Xander shrugged. "You really cannot, dear. Even you can't hold all that." He put his necklace back in place with a grin. "Much nicer, thank you." She looked at the others then at D'Nar. "Is there other news?"

"My idiot brother woke up?"

"Yell at the archeologists," Xander quipped. "They kept bothering that temple when I told them it was off limits and dangerous. No one even had a whip or the hat." Willow moaned, shaking her head and swatting him. "Hey! Easy! I had to take out the people who had Sal yesterday so I'm sore." The witch looked at him. "Humans. A group like the NID who had been HYDRA adjacent, basically paid minions in a side company. They're gone. I got a 'good job' from a general who hates me too." He grinned. "Sal's with Nort's people until I pick her up tonight."

"You need a vacation," the witch said dryly.

Xander smirked at her. "Then you'd better find me some help since I'm the only watcher down here. There's two retired. One's sick and can't back me up anyway since he can't walk. The other's kinda genocidal about anyone not whitely British enough. Him, I'm trying to find a way to get him arrested legally."

"Symon Marth?" she guessed. Xander nodded. "Yes, he should be. I'll check to see if there's other warrants."

"Not yet," he admitted. "I talked to the locals about him and they're looking for one to show up."

"Gladly." She looked at Willow.

"I can find something I'm sure," she agreed happily. She grinned at Xander. "I can find a warrant."

"Have fun with that. Do it for Petrie in Asia and South America, whichever one he's in this month."

"Already working on him too," Willow assured him. She looked at the pot. "What happens if someone like me does suck up some of the energy?"

"You become tainted like your watcher is," Hadi said dryly.

"Xander had radiation sickness when Sunnydale fell in," Xander quipped. "And when he went on his roadtrip to Oxnard. That's why I have the shielding necklace. They're still cuddly and each time I get cuddled I feel like they're trying to make me pregnant with their energy."

"It's kinda neat how we can track him around Cleveland by how the hellmouth leans toward him. Though we all freaked out when he got mugged that once and it tried to help him." She grinned at Xander then at the gods. "If he's used some, they'll all try to cuddle to top him back up, even though his own will grow slowly."

Xander nodded. "It is very weird but helpful and I'd miss it if it was gone. Some nights I'm my own nightlight."

The coven witch squeaked. "Really?" He nodded. So did D'Nar. And Nort when he appeared with Sal. "Oh, Lord." She bowed.

He waved a hand. "This one was trying hard not to pout at my altar tree."

"I said I'd be back for her tonight," Xander quipped, giving his slayer a hug. "This is Lady D'Nar," he said with a point then introduced the rest to her.

Sal smiled and waved. "Hi! I'm future Slayer Sal. It's pleasant to meet you." They smiled and waved back. "Is that the bad flower you found?"

"Yup. And it's apparently super dangerous."

"It's pretty so must be deadly. Plants are like that," she told him, looking very serious.

He hugged her. "I know. So are some people." She giggled, hugging him.

Willow came over. "Hey, Sal, I'm Willow. This is Eira, she's with the coven."

The girl's eyes got very wide. "Oh! Is it a super bad flower? I can hide since I'm not old enough to fight yet."

"Not that bad. We're seeing what it is and how to deal with it." The girl relaxed and smiled again, nodding. "You seem like you're a very smart little girl." She patted her on the head. "Don't play dumb like Buffy does all the time." She went back to the flower conference.

Sal looked at Xander, who smirked and nodded. "She does play dumb to throw people off."

"I guess that's bad then." She cuddled in on his lap, yawning to fall asleep. The witch sneezed and she disappeared with a squeak. "Oh!" The two big girls there stared at her oddly. "A witch sneezed!"

One of the girls smiled, squatting in front of her. "I'm Slayer Katya."

"I'm future Slayer Sal!" she squealed, hugging her. "At least you're not a bad girl!"

"No, I'm not a bad girl. You can hang with me and Yani until someone figures out you're here. Which witch was it?"

"I was with Xander with a few Goddesses and a God over a plant but there was a Willow there and a Witch Eira."

"We can call Xander to make sure he knows you're here." She did that. "I have a tiny slayer." She looked at her. "We can make sure her booboos aren't hurt, Xander. Sure, we can future slayer sit until you guys deal with the evil flower. Thanks."

She hung up. "The witch sneezed because the flower was trying to claim people to own." Sal hugged her. "They're fine. It didn't even want Xander, it wanted Witch Eira. Willow's probably pouty about that." She cuddled the young one, bringing her back to teach her about patrol planning since that's what they were doing.

They'd get to hand her off to the other slayers nearby while they went on patrol and Xander got less radiated.

***

Xander handed Sal back to her aunt, shrugging a bit then wincing. "She was all cleaned up and healed. Then a witch sneezed so she visited some of the senior slayers by accident. But it did get her away from the bad flower we found that was radiating so hard and trying to claim people. So she's safe, healed, all that."

He patted Sal on the head. "Go play." She ran off to check her farm animals while Xander got glared at by her aunt. "I had nothing to do with that. I was going to pick her up from the healers that night but God Nort brought her to the meeting over the flower I found growing inside a hellmouth. I was asking some garden and harvesting gods about it to see if it was evil, which it was, and how to kill it."

"Was she exposed?"

"No. I made sure. Then a witch from the Devon coven we called in with Willow sneezed due to the magic growing. It sent her to Senior Slayer Katya. They watched her when they weren't on patrol and then Yani's mom and her cousin who's a slayer babysat for a bit." He grinned. "She did learn something from them though."

"Fine. Is she healed?"

"Yeah. All the stitches are out and she's fully healed. Nort's healers had gotten most of them but a few still had stitches. Those have been removed. All but one that I couldn't get. She's picked it open and gotten one side out but not the other. She insisted because she hated me doing it. It'll fall out or dissolve in a few days at the worst."

The aunt nodded. "Fine. As long as she was safe."

He grinned. "Katya's the senior girl born in Russia. She probably taught Sal about how to overthrow a communist but otherwise she was okay. They said they worked on some reading stuff, some math stuff, and her cousin said that they went over laundry instructions with modern machines. They were learning how to use their new high efficiency washer. She helped them plant tomatoes."

"That's fine, Xander. Are you staying to work with her?"

"No. I've got a battle in two days," he sighed, then grimaced. "I feel like I got sucked by a whole pack of succuba again but it's not supposed to be too bad." He grinned, hugging the tiny slayer. "Be a good girl. Check with me on Friday." She nodded, going to hug her aunt. Xander winked at her then left to go handle things.

Sal looked up at her aunt. "Is my father all right?"

"I have not asked. We can call tomorrow. Tell us what you learned from the older slayers." She babbled, grinning as she told her about the older girls she had hung out with. She had helped another slayer on the bulletin board pick out her wedding dress too. Her aunt was amused at the hyperness but it was good she was happy after what had happened.

***

Willow looked at the person logging her in for voting. "I'm also supposed to vote here for the magical people's stuff," she said quietly, handing over that voter's ID card.

The poll worker looked at it. Then up at her. "Dear, there's no separate government."

That person waved Willow over. "You do that with me, Miss Rosenburg. Do your normal election first." She nodded, being taken to do that.

The poll worker came over to stare at him. "There's a shadow government?"

"We have things that don't deal with yours. The rules for the magical community are a lot different. Most countries that have a magical community big enough to need our own schools and stuff does. MaCUSA is ours here."

"What are they responsible for?"

"Just the magical community in the US. There's a few regional councils and our magical congress and president. Who does back up the US president but isn't in the line of succession at all."

"Why would you do that?"

"Because until recently we were all hidden, dear. We didn't go out among your kind at all if we could help it. We have our own parts of cities we've walled off so you couldn't find us." He smiled. "That kept us safe from people like witch hunters and other groupies. Our schools are magical people only. Consider it like a cultural enclave only there's multiple ones around the US.

"Every major city has a section of us and a shopping area. Some have smaller day schools instead of the bigger boarding academies. We have our own rules because we have to worry about things like changing people against their wills and things. Usually we don't let witches like Rosenburg join us as they use a different form of magic most of us didn't even realize about. So we have our own rule setting body."

"Can't you integrate them now?"

"No." He shook his head. "Some of our people are farther behind the times than the current ones. England's community is still stuck in the Victorian years." Willow walked over. "Your kind of witch uses covens."

"We do. There's a few higher covens who're set up to be overseers of problem witches doing things. The Devon coven in England. They don't set rules but if you break the natural laws they get you for it. I had no idea the US had the MaCUSA."

"They wouldn't have let you anyway, Rosenburg. It was wand users only."

"Point. Can you use both?"

"Not that I'm aware of but I'm not a geek. I just teach english at a day school." He grinned, taking her voting card to sign her in and then let her go vote. He looked at the other poll worker. "It's been this way since the US started, dear. We didn't have a dual one during the civil war, and we tried to stay out of it, but we did back up the legitimate government of the US. As we do now. Our laws are on top of theirs."

"Oh." She grimaced. "That seems very weird."

"Yes but we were hidden for our own good."

"Still weird." She went back to her seat to sign in the next person in her district. How did that impact politics for the regular sort? Were they supposed to vote for both elections going on?

***

Willow looked at a teacher a few days later. "I looked it up. She was right. The magical community takes their own census and they registered two-point-eight-one million people." She handed over a copy of that. "So she's right about the population density in the US."

"Why aren't they on the normal one?"

"Because the magical community was kept hidden for their own safety. You're also looking at the undercounting of the homeless population and transient populations. People who RV all the time and the like. People who're always on the road and live out of a bus or a truck. They may not have a home to be counted.

"That would probably add about another million people overall. Maybe one and a half depending on how they undercounted the homeless populations. Not to mention the demonic communities." She handed that over with a grin. "Which count for another sixteen million and a bit across the US."

The teacher read those over. "What if they're counted in the regular census?"

"The demonic community wouldn't have. That's not considered safe to let the humans know about your people."

"Oh." She slumped. "So that answer could have a few different ones. I'll give her those points for that answer back." She put those on her desk. "She has been an intolerable smartass today however. She talked about how Africa had cities."

"It does. A lot of cities. Each country has at least one bigger city and some are older than the important, historical ones in Europe." She grinned. "Our watcher down there, Xander, has seen most of the continent helping the girls and handling battles. He's sent back pictures. It's really based in racist ideology that we think Africa's all starving people that you see on the charity ads at three in the morning."

"I....I knew South Africa had at least one."

"Has at least three. Including Sun City, who we were boycotting when I was a little girl."

"I forgot about that." She frowned. "We consider them a lot of dusty plains areas."

"No. It's got a lot of those and a lot of forested areas, mountains, deserts, all sorts of geography and some of it is urban and some's really rural. I can dig up the pictures Xander's sent the girls from over there if you want."

"I'll ask that teacher. I was substituting today." She frowned. "Why don't we see that?"

"For the same reason that you don't see black women with PhD's the same as white guys with them?"

"Oh, that reason." She nodded. "Colonialism."

Willow nodded with a grin. "Yup. My parents had a talk down there and were horrified that the university was so large. They thought it was a small community college level college, not a national university. She said they had no idea they had colleges like that."

"Your mother's not very good at what she does, sorry but my opinion."

"Mine too," she agreed with a grin and a nod. "I sued them for putting me in the books." She shrugged and looked at the principal coming in. "If the social studies teacher wants, I'll gladly dig up the pictures that Xander sent back from Africa about their cities and towns."

"I hadn't thought about that. I was coming to talk about that though. He did?"

"Yeah. Xander's been over a lot of the continent training the girls down there. He's sent the girls pictures back from some of the cities and parks."

"Interesting. It'd be appreciated. Your girls have been noting exclusionary communities?"

"Well, the demon community is still very isolated. That's for their own safety. The magical community is a bit more open now but still very closed off for their own safety. So that does happen. A bit worse than cultural enclaves do but less than walled off usually."

The principal considered it. "I didn't realize that could happen."

Willow grinned and nodded. "The magical community has their own governing bodies. Up to the Magical Congress of the USA. I just barely got voting inclusion in that one this year. The demonic ones have regional councils usually. We work with a lot of them when there's a problem in their areas.

"Sometimes they even call in a slayer to help whatever the problem is. Faith had to tell one that was fighting a takeover to hold fair elections to make sure that's what the people wanted. Both of the sides got voted out and a new one got put in but it was locals."

The two shared a look then looked at her. "They could count on the human ones."

"Why would they count on the people who'd want to kill them all for being different?" Willow asked.

"Point," the principal agreed. "I can see that some day being combined." Willow shrugged. "I know, they're probably satisfied." She nodded. "Well, maybe we can have a talk about that with the kids next week?"

"I can pull up stuff for that," Willow agreed with a smile. "See if someone like Giles can come do that."

"Thank you, Miss Rosenburg." They shook hands and Willow let them talk. "I never considered the populations of enclave communities." She went to look some of that up.

***

One of the senators was on the news being a blowing, talking head. "We should not have various governments in the same country," he complained loudly, thumping his fist on the table in front of him. "It undermines our authority. There should be one set of rules for everyone."

The other person on the call was Xander and he was already tired of this. "Senator, what rules would you make for the beings who have to eat living flesh to live? Though most of them do get medical byproduct waste from surgeries, or from the kitten poker circuit, some of them can't do that and have volunteers from species that don't mind losing a limb because they'll regrow it.

"Or the magical community that can torture someone by waving a stick and muttering from across the room?" The senator was spluttering. "They were hidden for their own safety for centuries. In the magical community's reason, because people like you hunted them down for being able to do things you couldn't. And a lot of greed."

He stared at the other picture in front of him. "How would you make rules for species that if they touch a human they're poisoned and will die within days?" He stared at the horrified looking newsperson then at the senator again.

"They were split off and hidden for their own safety. Yes, they do often follow many of the laws in the US but some of them don't apply to their reality. Your reality is yours and that's all on you. You live your reality. They live theirs. The same as the slayers live their own that has nothing to do with you and your ways."

The news person looked at him. "The slayers get into a lot of battles."

"We get into more fights than anything. It's a brawl when you're fighting a vampire to stake them. Battles happen too frequently for our sanity sometimes."

"That would be assault if the vampires were living beings."

"Probably," he said with a nod. "And attempted murder or actual murder. But they're vampires and they're like roaches in most cases. If we don't take them out they'll take over cities and eat everyone in them."

"Do your girls fall under one of the other congresses?" she asked.

"No. We're under international authority really. In the US we follow mostly US laws. The ones in Lithuania follow their laws. And had to run from some politicians last night because they wanted her to be their figurehead and stick up for them. She pointed out we're outside all that political mess because we have to be. We can't just save the people that like us." He waved a hand at the other picture.

"I have no problems with the slayers!" he complained.

Xander pulled out a picture from the folder in front of him and slid it to the reporter with a smile. "We tape and take pictures of every single protest around the girls. Just to see how many are frequent whiners. I believe that's the other guest and he's holding a sign saying God hates the slayers and they should all be killed to purify humanity."

"It does look like it." She showed it to the camera, making him shut his link down but they could hear him swearing. Xander grinned at her. "You knew it'd be him?" He slid over the folder. "I see the last two protests' pictures."

"Yes you do. I'm sure you recognize some of the people in them." He grinned. "Most of the ones you'd have called on to talk about this would've been in those."

"They are. Is that a molitov?" she demanded, looking at the picture closer.

"It sure was. And about two minutes after that picture I used a crossbow bolt to break that bottle on him. He stomped off in a huff. He sounded like a frustrated damsel."

She blinked at him. "Would you say that if he was here?"

"I never say anything about someone that I wouldn't say to their face. I may not have tact or be classy like Giles but I will call a bigot a bigot to his face." He grinned. "What're they going to do, sue me for libel? We can prove it's the truth with their actions. If they try to beat me I can fight back. If they keep me from fighting back, I've pre-used a debt I was owed to come back as a vengeance spirit." He winked and got up. "You have a great day?"

"You too, Mr. Harris. Why are you talking to us?"

"The higher ups, not the senior watchers but the chess playing beings who pick the slayers, demanded I defrag some of the tension before it snapped. They wouldn't mind but they'd lose a poker bet or something. Then again, the Powers That Be are a bit cranked. They tried to tell me to run for an office." He grinned. "Even though I'm not old enough for a higher position and I have no idea how that works." He shook her hand and left, casually strolling out.

"I need to ask someone about the beings over the slayers apparently. How cranked are they and who are they making bets with?" The film went to commercial so she could call the Council house to see if they'd talk about those beings. Giles had Willow email her about the Powers and their ideas.

She brought it back while her fill-in was going on with her next planned story. "Thank you for filling in while I talked to the Council's higher ups about those beings." She settled in her seat with a smile, letting her fill-in backup reporter read that email.

"Oh, that's very interesting. So those Powers That Be are neutral beings who want balance. Huh. How does that hamper the slayers?"

She pointed at a section. "According to whoever wrote that primer, which says it is from the manual for the girls, they often ignore their desires. It notes that they've sent visions about some of the battles, but the slayers replanned it and made it easier to win without losing lives."

"We should talk to them about that."

"We should," she agreed happily. "I'd like to invite Mr. Giles on the show later this week." She looked at the camera and smiled. "Mr. Harris is a bit more hardline about certain things, but Mr. Giles is in charge of even him. So we should hear from him." Her backup nodded. "But anyway, we were talking about the newest scandal from congress? Which one?"

"The main one. There's rumors of wild debauchery." She grinned. "How bad was it?"

"Oh, it was so nasty we can't even show the film someone took during it. It's that dirty." Her backup reporter grinned at that idea. They went over that idea and the edited film from that event.

***

"We really must handle the problems that outing did to the community," one of the demonic congress people said to the rest of them. "We've only made him an enemy of this congress. We must punish him for that in other ways."

"If we do, other humans won't follow it and may try to help him," another shouted from the back. "Unfortunately."

"Can we extend it to his family?"

"His son was almost used as a victim. Many beings would protect their young, even if it meant destroying the universe," the head of the congress said then sighed. "It's noble he was trying to contain the damage done. We should be going against the demon who showed up and outed the community for real, not the human. He had good intentions but bad intent. The demon was just a moron."

That speaker nodded. "I can see that. Is it still alive?"

"He's hiding by the immigration point in Switzerland. They won't let him leave." The head of the congress smiled at him. "They do not wish to extradite him. Yet. We have asked. They will allow those communities most hurt by his foolishness to come gather him for trials but won't send him off."

"Which is reasonable because anyone they'd send to make him appear would probably be needed to guard that colony," the speaker said with a grimace. "Can we agree to help the communities that need it to punish him?"

"I think we have. You were laying an egg then," the head of the congress said dryly. That one nodded and went back to her seat. "Any other motions today?" Someone tried to kick in the door but their guards got them. "What was that?" she called.

"Human idiots," one of their guards called back.

"Oh, dear. Let's all evacuate calmly and safely," she announced, banging the gavel.

A guard leaned in. "That's not possible. They have the building surrounded. We'll evacuate you when we can." He closed and locked the door from the outside. Then he made a call to hopefully get help. That one called the slayer house but slayers didn't deal with people.

Xander...he dealt with people for the slayers. He got sent by the witches once he had a few weapons and laid into a few of them, staring at them. "Really? Here? On the demonic congressional building?" One sneered and tried to hit him so he punched them. "C'mon then. I've handled mass invasions by idiot humans before. If I have to, I can do that."

He waved them on and a few more tried to attack him. Which gave agents time to get there to help him. Xander nodded at the first one. "Get the demonic congress members safely out of the building," he ordered. That agent passed that back and more agents showed up to help with that. Xander stepped on one guy, making him scream since he was standing on the new hole in his chest, while he shot at a few others.

"C'mon, bastards. You're nothing next to defending a Somali refugee camp." A few agents stared at him oddly. "Hey, Watcher Xander Harris, the guy training minis in Africa." He smirked at them. "They really are wooses next to terrorists." He spotted someone and shot him in the head. "Go me, I got a germ selling idiot. Ten good karma points."

He shot a few more of his people then got another human who had a kid hostage. That ended that problem. And most of the other ones since that guy screamed loudly. Xander put his gun on his shoulder, staring at the people the agents were arresting. "What was the bright thought, people? Not like it'd end the Demonic Congress of the US. They've been around longer than the human congress."

He smirked at one who he had only wounded, who whined and wiggled toward an agent. "Yeah, you do that." He put his gun back down at his side, looking at the agent staring at him. "The one I got in the head is a wanted germ doc. Wanted in three countries. He took blood from an ebola quarantine area on purpose and tried to sell it but no one wanted anything that nasty. After all, you can't rule a dead world." He shrugged slightly.

"Sir, who are you?" another agent asked, stomping over.

"Watcher Xander Harris, watcher over the girls in Africa who're training at home."

"I...." He licked his lips. "Have you had to handle such incidences before?"

"Including defending a refugee camp, yeah." He nodded. "And a few other battles too." He grinned a bit. "They really like to ignore I exist until something huge is starting then they call at all hours."

"I can see that." He nodded. "This building?"

"That is the congressional hall of the Demonic Congress of the US. They've been in control of the demonic communities since 1753 if I remember right. Maybe 1756. I only read it in a book once."

"Are you human?"

"I was born that way but I've been exposed to demon blood over the years." He grinned. "Why?"

"Wondering if you were one of their guards as well."

"No. They have a guard unit. It's mostly ceremonial but SWAT trained. They're probably holding the inside safe. I got told that these supposed humans were breaking in there to blow them up. Which would mean a lot of hell from a lot of communities. Including the slayers backing them up for taking out peaceful beings."

The agent in charge nodded. "That's good of them. Slayers should protect all peaceful beings I guess." Xander smiled and nodded. "Okay. Are you using standard bullets?"

"Yes. I didn't think I'd need silver coated or anything today." He checked his gun. "Yeah, typical regular ammo and I'm about out." He put the clip back in but didn't chamber a round to make the agent calm down. "I'm glad I could help. Let me go help them evacuate." He walked around some people, and on top of a few in his way. "Should've been better humans."

"God hates them," one whined.

Xander stopped to look at them. "They were here long before your religion got started. In fact, the Council has history books from back that far, taken down from oral traditions. You should see some of the demon cities they've found that predate humans grunting in caves." That one started to fake cry.
"Aww. Though you have to explain to your God why you don't care about the beings on his planet if you believe that way since you haven't taken care of the gifts he laid for you to protect." He gave them a pointed look before walking inside. "I'm sure he'll be happy to hear from you for once."

He found the right hallway thanks to the signs. "Okay, people," he said, making the guard team start and stare at him. "What? Didn't expect me? Slayers can't harm a human but I damn sure have before today." He put his sunglasses on top of his hair. "Let's get them clear. They need to go soothe their families."

"We're doing a search for bombs."

"Okay. I can stand here and look tough. Agents are outside cleaning up the mess."

"How are your minis?" one of the guards said.

"Pretty good. One's still very bouncy and trying to talk a goddess' main priestess into playing dollies with her sometimes." They stared at him oddly. He grinned. "She's near Minia's temple." That got a group 'ah' moment. "She sneaks over to like their flowers and help the butterflies or other bugs treat them right. The priestess is ancient but amused by her. So she's trying to get her to play dollies and have a proper tea party like the other girls told her about."

That got a few smiles. "She's very sweet sounding."

"Nope. She's a little hellion. Rode the family's goat to go visit the temple the first time and nearly lost it. Her mother tried to have her depossessed because it was clear some chaos demon had taken her daughter over." He grinned. "She's sweet but she and Ethan Rayne must have a similar devotion sometimes."

The guards laughed at that. Someone rushed in shouting and shooting so Xander turned and threw a dagger at him, making him fall down screaming in pain and wetting himself. "Hey, how're you today?" he asked dryly, smirking at that one. "Pleasant day for you?" The guy whined and tried to get the knife out.

"No, it can stay for now." He kicked the guy on the head. "We got another one," he bellowed toward the outside. "Back hallway!" An agent came rushing in. "I need the knife back if I can. I won it in a poker game that defended Angola."

"Gladly, Watcher Harris." He looked down. "He's an agent."

"He came in shooting at us," the head of the guard team said.

"I can see the gun. We'll put him up on charges too." He looked at Harris. "You're very dangerous."

Xander smiled. "Thank you! Usually I hear I'm way too normal." He beamed at the agent.

"Why would you?"

"Ask Buffy, she'll tell you I'm normal at the top of her voice."

"Ah." He nodded. "No, you're not normal, Watcher Harris." He handed back the knife and dragged the guy back outside to their boss. Who was glaring by the time he dropped the guy at his feet. "Harris had a knife."

"I can see that. He can be arrested and explain his dysfunction too." That got a nod.

"I was going to protect them," he whined. "The guards weren't stopping him at all!"

"He's the guy in charge of the young slayers in Africa," the lesser agent told him. "They were probably talking about the slayers." The guy whined at that. "He needs a bandage and specially cuffed," he called with a point. "Knife wound to the shoulder." One of the paramedics came to do that for him while they cuffed him so it wouldn't hurt that injury more than it was already hurt.

The bomb team got called in to look at the vehicles in the lot for the guard team since they were handling two in the building. They got everyone evacuated within a half-hour and relaxed once the mess was cleaned up.

They could relax and start a review of what had happened and how to make sure it couldn't happen to anyone again. Though the agents weren't aware that the demonic community had their own congress or the magical community had their own. It meant they'd need to make some rules to help guard those areas once they found where they were.

***

Xander had to show up in Cleveland, the witches had sent him there instead of home. So he sighed as he walked through the gateway. The reporters sent up a shout about him having weapons. He stared at them. "I was just helping defend the Demonic Congress of the US's building and people. Beyond that, I'm a field watcher, people. I'm usually armed for my own safety."

He opened the door. "Giles, the witches wouldn't send me directly home because I had to help defend the USDC building," he called. "They said I had to report to you." He shut the door again then looked up. "Okay enough?" They all heard someone not there sigh and he disappeared.

Buffy came out and looked around. "Did they send him back?" she called. The reporters all nodded. "Shoot! I wanted to know what their problem was." She went back inside pouting. "Giles, they sent him back already." She checked the news then went outside. "If it was at the human congress, you guys would be talking about it for months. Why is there no news coverage of that one? I'm hoping it's not because they're the demonic congress."

"We're here, not at the station, and only the supervising editors have that sort of power to decide which stories get covered," one told her. "What happened there?"

"We got a call from a poker buddy to get them some backup. Apparently a bunch of the sort that attack the girls now and then were trying to rush and take out their building. Slayers can't hurt people outside of self defense so we called the guy who could, Xander. He went to help I guess. I wanted a report and so does Giles. I guess we'll have to get one from the demonic news station." She looked at that reporter. So did the other reporters.

"He made a fine figure there with his gun and shooting humans trying to take out the USDC," she agreed happily. "Then when other agents came he told them what was going on and they helped. The Knight went inside to check on people and got one inside the building too.

"We overheard him telling one of the agents that one he shot was a germ person who had stolen ebola laden blood." She shifted under the continued staring. "The Secret Service is handling the clean up, everyone got evacuated to their homes, and most are being moved somewhere more secure as of the last update we've had from them."

Buffy nodded. "So Xander was really helpy. That's great!" She smiled and nodded. "I figured he'd run into guys like that down there too. I know he stopped someone making zombies for profit by throwing up in their fire. He told Giles about that during the meeting."

The reporter grimaced but nodded. "I'll look into that. I know some people rely on them to be a complacent guard force to beef up their numbers."

"Ewww."

"Yes, but some people are like that, dear," the reporter reminded her.

"I know but zombies are gross." She went back inside to tell Giles that. He was amused at least. No one had told him that they had called in for help or that Buffy had asked the witches to send Xander to help. The local demon news station was most helpful about all that incident.

Faith leaned in to look over the shoulder of a few watchers watching it with Giles. "He still looks hot with the gun too." She walked off. "Someone'll have him being a pinup again soon."

Giles glared at the doorway she had been in. "Don't tempt that thought!" he yelled after her. He huffed and let the news report take over their attention again. Xander had done good things, and in a decent enough way, but it would probably get him in trouble. Or he'd have to talk to higher ups in the political world again.

***

The agent sent to talk to Harris came back thinking hard. "If we had heard it was the demonic congress building, would we have acted faster?" he asked the supervisor he was to report to.

"They're still debating if that's our job," he admitted.

"Which means they all would've died. Harris was right. That would bring a lot of hell to the US communities." The supervisor winced at that reminder. There were already protests and the slayers were backing them up to make sure they were safe and peaceful. Only one being had thrown something at someone trying to provoke them into violence and Buffy had gotten him with a crossbow bolt to the thigh so he had quit.

"Harris said he knew we wouldn't really react fast enough to help at all. He was surprised we got there before it was all handled actually. And he also pointed out that since we weren't doing our job, he had to make it his job to handle it. It may be vigilante of him but he's used to handling battles and humans who're spoiled assholes as he put it.

"Right before he had to talk to a newly made general who hated that slayers are girls. Which Harris told him to cry to someone else about before he let them do it all by themselves. Apparently that general's boss had tried that and nearly lost his country so they won't allow that." The supervisor slumped, staring at him. "We're to guard the ones who rule the country. They rule their part of the country."

"Will he be stepping in again?"

"If they ask." He shifted his weight. "He had no idea it was going on until someone called him to ask for help for their congress members. They tried the slayers and one of them called him immediately because they can't handle humans."

"Charming. It could be considered illegal."

"To protect the rulers of a portion of the country? If they had been human and a part of our congress he would've been given some pointless papers to hide in his glove box of his truck, sir."

"Point."

"Not like we can combine the other two congresses. We don't have rules to deal with beings who can poison you by touching your arm. Or who could eat you if they're really hungry but made a decision to recycle leftover hospital waste from surgeries."

"That's still very gross to me but also true," he sighed. "They're debating it with the president."

"I'm pretty sure the president can point out that they do fall back to US laws and they're built on the back of US laws."

"Hopefully. Are you willing to go talk to their guard team?"

"Probably. It's not my usual job. Usually I'm guarding a single target. I can ask them what sort of backup they'd like to see happen without promising it. I'm sure they realize the US is full of people who'd like to see only standard, average humans. Which Harris is not. He's been exposed to demon byproducts thanks to them dying in battles he's been in." The supervisor winced. "Born fully human though."

"I didn't even think about that problem. That's going to complicate things certainly for him talking to doctors about injuries." He rubbed his forehead. "Go talk to the ones making decisions. Tell them what you've heard." He nodded, going to do that with his report. It was probably not going to help the fighting much but it might make some people see sense. Or at least make it more civil for a bit.

***

The First Lady met with the other two First Ladies, having them for tea. She thought it was fascinating and got them to talk about their communities and duties while she explained some of her odder ones. Including planting a vegetable garden for them and the nearby children. They all smiled and figured out how to work together on some smaller projects. When one of the Secret Service guards cleared his throat, she looked at him, smiling slightly. "Problems?"

"Just a bit dry, ma'am, but I'm not sure if that group would allow others outside themselves to help with that program. They're known to be isolationist and a bit racist." He looked at the other two. "The Rose Foundation isn't known to be that way and they're doing a mass planting project in one of the parks later this spring."

"That's not a bad idea and that other group hates me for not being very fair skinned," she said dryly. "They'll get over it." The guard nodded at that. She smiled at the other two. "Even if one insists that I'm actually a man because I have good muscles." They giggled and she grinned, sipping her tea.

She looked outside. "Oh, there's that dog again." She sighed. "Go home!" she bellowed and the 'dog' yelped but ran off. "Thank you." She looked at the other two First Ladies, grinning at them. "It really loves the roses outside that window for some reason. We've come in a few times and found it sleeping in that bush."

"It probably wanted to be scented that way," the magical community's First Lady said, looking at the other one.

"They're not much for scent but they do like flowers, they're soft and absorb their ...overflow."

Michelle smiled. "The local slayer called it a snot puppy when we asked her what it was."

"Yes, they do ooze a bit," she said, looking outside. "And it's back." Michelle sighed but waved her tea cup before taking a drink. "We can have it removed."

"Why? We have two stray cats and another stray dog that lives around the garden sometimes. The girls think it's cute. As long as it doesn't break an heirloom plant I'm fine with it and the husband said it was so ugly it was cute, and a dog he's not allergic to for once. Then he told the girls they can't beg for one like they've wanted a dog." She smiled. The others giggled at that.

A guard rushed in. "Ma'am, we've got a weird intruder in the White House," he said. "I need you three to stay in here," he said, nodding at the other two. "We have no idea who it is."

"Do we have a picture?" Michelle asked. He showed her from the camera feed. "Hmm. Is that one of yours?" she asked the magical one.

"No, that's a coven sort of magic user," she said with a grimace. "Block his hands, give him a headache. He'll fall down. He's supposedly into chaos."

"Thank you, ma'am." He nodded at them as he called that in and let them stay in that room. He came back ten minutes later. "He's down, he had information on something that's going to happen soon. We've called the slayers to handle it since it's supposed to be another invasion sort of problem. So nothing you three should worry about." He left them again.

They all sighed in displeasure but they could handle that. They were First Wives, they could handle most things.

The magical First Lady looked at the demonic one. "How do you address the senator with three wives? Is there a difference when you talk to them formally?"

"Some species do that. In his case, I call them First Wife or Second Wife. The third one is a bit touchy about that and her name is Hellen."

"Oh, okay. Thank you." She smiled. "They're going to be at a reception I'm throwing in a few days."

"I think they're coming to mine too," Michelle said, looking at her phone and nodding. "He has agreed to come to mine as well." She smiled. "You're both invited too of course." They smiled and compared upcoming meetings to attend. It did get so boring being them sometimes. They needed more people who understood what a bore so many diplomats and politicians were.

"There's one of the stray cats, ladies," the guard said. "It's been randomly friendly but seems to like men to pet it more." He pointed at the one slinking through the bushes to cuddle up with the snot puppy. They smiled at that and took pictures with their phones.

***

Xander got called in for the meeting over that upcoming apocalypse. "I hate to say it," he said. "But that's between two for me. One's possibly a reaction to that one as we have them listed as their ancient enemies. The first one is a realm that's probably running from a tyrant but they want to take over wherever they land.

"We *think* we can have them run through a second portal to get them somewhere more hospitable to them. The portal makers down here said they could. The third.... I have no idea. I haven't had that vision yet. I only see bigger apocalypse moments. Interestingly enough I've seen one about one of the slayers dating." He stared at Giles, who shuddered. "Did you talk to her yet? I had it again last night."

"I left it to Buffy but I'll talk to her."

"Have her call me like this," Xander said. "I'll explain it to her." Giles smiled and nodded. "Yours, use the artillery. They're shootable with silver or explodable. They're just tiny and fast."

"Can they be stopped by a freezing spell?" the head of the guards for the magical congress asked.

"No clue but they're not noted to be immune from magic. They have a close cousin species already down here but they're super peaceful. Like willing to destroy the government to get peace sort of super peaceful." That got a note taken. "They're not generally dangerous to anyone. Unless they really *want* to force peace."

"All right," Giles said. "I know of that species. They're not immune to magic but I don't think it'll kill them." He looked at the others. "The one we've had to fight in recent history, because it had been fed something that made it high, couldn't be killed by a cutting hex but a sword did work. So did the potion to slow it down."

"All right, so we may be able to slow them down or temporarily freeze them," that guard said with a nod, making that note. "How big are we looking?"

Xander snorted. "If it goes the way the other visions have shown? You've got *thousands* coming through in under ten minutes. Piling over each other to get out. Now, mine has been different. I keep seeing something standing behind them. Something in a cloak that covers their face pushing them to come. They're not that bright, unlike their cousins, so there's someone behind them." He sent over his vision's notes. "That's from mine. I'm the only one who's seen that portal."

"How right are you?" the demonic head guard asked.

"I've been off-time a few times because they pushed it back to discredit me."

"Shit."

"But I only see apocalypse battles and that's not as harmful as I usually see. So why did I see that guy in the back?"

Giles straightened up, staring at him. "You believe he's a problem?"

"I know he's a problem. I don't know *which* problem. He's behind that and the third one I'll have I think. And he's not that tyrant. He's not against him bluntly but he's not on his side either. The third one looks like a distraction. So does this one. If those ones eat all of a city it'd be amusing but take them years. They can each only eat a half a person a day. Even with ten thousand, LA has millions of people. They can't hope to use it to take over."

The three people shared a look then at him. "Which do you consider more important?"

"I'm not sure they're not all distractions. Well, the first is a timed one. They do it every so often on purpose. It's another case of 'we're going to release our people who have done us wrong so they can leave us to ourselves' sort of release from their prison. Generally of reformist sorts who want to structure social change."

"Great," Giles said. "Can we make them use another realm?"

"No. Their Goddess is down here. She's totally frustrated by that, and she's the one who warned me before I had any vision. Her telling me prompted that one." He grimaced, looking behind him. Then at the group again. "It can be managed with weapons if we have enough. I'm out down here outside the military people and they've seen all the visions.

"I share liberally with them about those things. They all think they're a diversion. Or at least yours and our last one. I don't know *why* though. None of us can figure out a reason. It's not for an ascending one, right?"

"No, no upcoming star events to promote one." Giles looked at his calendar. "Is there any celebrations coming soon?"

"Goddess Hannar is getting married next month. The girls all nicely sent her cute handmade cards." He grinned. "It's right before then because I warned her I was having visions for things about that time. She made sure it was before then because it'll be a small wedding. Only her family and some of his."

"What's she over?" Giles asked.

The demonic guard from their congress coughed. "She's a battle goddess, over spearmen."

Xander nodded. "And pikes and those sort of weapons, yeah. He's not officially over anything but he is a smith." He grinned. "He gave her a diamond spear for an engagement ring for her hair."

"Awww," Giles said, making that note. "Let us know if you take any notes from the wedding."

"Not going. Wasn't invited. I'm just playing external guard to make sure no one interrupts it. Her mom'll be there."

The demon guard shuddered. "Her mother's a war goddess."

"Her mother is their people's only war goddess," Xander agreed with a nod. "And she's supposedly looking for her sixth or seventh husband." Giles made that note. "Don't even joke," he said with a grin. "She thinks I'm cute like a puppy. One of the bigger slayers warned her that bad girls were drawn to me so she could protect herself and she told the slayer that I'm cute like a puppy but not that dangerous."

"I'd hope you're not dangerous enough to mate with a war goddess," Giles said as he made notes. He looked up. "Though we'd love for you to find someone to settle down with."

"Yeah, not likely. They all think I'm weird."

Giles nodded. "Sometimes you can be. Then again you read comic books."

"Hey!" Xander complained while the all three guards laughed at that. "Oh! Speaking of." He smirked at the guards. "I've seen the supposed hospital down here for the super villain sort. You guys realize it's down, right?" They all shook their heads. "Yeah, has been for months now. The people in charge are there but they're not exactly people in control of their own actions.

"Somehow SHIELD found out, told their people, and that's why that building collapsed." He smirked. "One sent me drugged candy. I sent it back without the centers in the candy and a nice note saying 'nice try but Andrew's done worse to me' and a lipstick kiss from one of the minis. They giggled."

The three guards sighed while Giles took off his glasses to rub his eyes. "Are you taunting them, Xander?"

"Yeah. If they come for me I can use them in a battle." He smirked. "Whole lot easier than getting a militia into it these days. They're all avoiding me like I'm against their ways and going to use them as cannon fodder." He smiled angelically.

The Secret Service guard stared at him. "You've done what, Watcher Harris?" Xander grinned and pointed at Giles so he looked at him. Giles sighed and let them see that video file. Xander waved and signed off since a slayer was whining behind him about being hungry and bored. At the end of that video he looked at Giles. "You have quite a person in him, Mr. Giles."

"Yes and most of the time we appreciate him but the girls still consider him rather normal." He smiled a bit. "The rest of us who're still sane worry about Xander's mental abilities sometimes."

"We can see why," the demonic guard said. "We appreciate him and his ways but he is a bit...wild."

Giles nodded. "It's where he's been down there by himself. I really do want to find someone to go send Xander on a vacation but we don't have anyone."

"If we find someone who'd make a good watcher, we'll send them over," the one for the Secret Service promised. "Before that one dies of it."

"Don't even tempt a higher being to do that," Giles warned but he was smiling. "The Powers over the girls loathe Xander because he helped change the ways they were trained and is a signpost of how wrong they were. He teaches the girls about self will and making choices for themselves. They will not allow him to die in a battle unless it's horrifying because that would make him someone to look up to."

The demonic guard nodded. "There's bets about him being the only one to make it to old age and dementia."

Giles smiled at him. "He'd be shocked if he did."

"So would we." He made himself a few notes. Then looked at the others. "How would we find out that shadowy figure to stop him?"

"I have no idea outside scrying," Giles admitted. "If he's magical he could feel that."

"Point," the magical guard agreed. "Though we don't usually scry."

"We do," Giles said with a smile. "Quite well. Willow can do it in most any basin now. She was brushing her teeth and scrying a few of the younger girls on a date in the toilet the other night until one called her complaining she was being creepy." The guards smiled but they could hopefully use that skill.

***
Part 5 by Voracity2
The MaCUSA congress and president met that night to hear what the upcoming problems were. The MaCUSA president looked confused. "Hold on," he told the one giving the report. "They can *scry*? Like in books?" The guard nodded with a smirk. "Why?"

"Because they never gave that stuff up," the guard said. "Miss Rosenburg tried to scry that one event to find that shadowy figure. We think we found part of his group but not the one in charge."

The others looked at each other then at him. "We've never been able to do that sort of thing. All that was no-maj fantasy novel stuff," one of the females complained.

The guard shrugged. "Apparently not. They can easily scry and other things from fantasy novels. Also, they noted that covens can be stronger than we can. Rosenburg is stronger than we all are. Possibly together since she can channel the hellmouths."

"On that topic, did you have a chance to ask about how they come to be?"

The guard smiled and nodded. "We're wrong. They're naturally occurring. Though magic users can prompt them to be thinner or more open." They all sighed at that. "And the one in Cleveland is still radiating even while closed. They can measure that." They stared at him. "I shared our list of suspected ones to see if they knew about them." He put that folder down.

"They said four of them are hidden ancient temples to ancient gods, only one's from a demon realm." The MaCUSA president blinked and opened his mouth, starting to stand up. "The others are the working areas of covens, mostly ones that've been broken. Their hearth stone basically." He shrugged but handed one a book. "Their book on how hellmouths are formed. Based on science and there's a few scientists studying them now."

"So we're totally wrong?" the MaCUSA president demanded.

"Yes. Apparently." He tossed down another file from his bag. "From the recent archeological digs in Africa that Watcher Harris prompted. Both human and demonic archeologists visited. One of the most hateful toward demons. He did it during a televised sneering at the idea of demonic history and gave him the map so he could meet him there in a few days.

"The head of the demon university's archeology program had another one and announced his find at the same time the sneering one did." He grinned. "The Council has first written languages account of back that far. Translated a few times over but the tomb team that helped with their building in England found the originals in a safe. Gringotts had it translated again. We're wrong about a lot of stuff. Including about Merlin apparently. He was their type of sorcerer. They have a fact file on him."

The MaCUSA president rubbed his forehead. "So we've basically rewritten our history to make ourselves feel special?"

"Yes." He nodded with a grin. "The pureblood movement is going to have a hissy fit as the young ones say these days," he said dryly. "England is already clenched about everything trying to make sure people don't hear."

"Shit," the president muttered. "All right. How wrong were we?" The guard pointed at that set of folders and book. He took the book to look over. "Oh. I see they are natural and not magic being gathered. That's probably why we found those areas." He looked up. "Are they safe?"

"Yes. They've been identified as working areas for covens. They left the powers there so others with good intent could borrow them. Apparently a few are for fertility rituals and the like. Which are apparently very powerful. I met the young son that a male couple had together. Themselves."

"We've got records that some wizards tried that," one of the senators said.

The guard smiled and shook his head. "Not in decades. They can do it with a full coven helping. Or Rosenburg, who did that to a slayer's pet because she wanted kittens to play with. Without asking the slayer's permission. They were having a screaming match in their back garden over that and Slayer Summers had to yell at them to stop it before we guards heard. The Secret Service guard was amused as anything."

The MaCUSA president put down the book and carefully swallowed his spit. "Is she an anomaly?"

"Not fully. She was never trained. She stole books to train herself. Got into a bit of an addiction to black magic. The coven in Devon helped her end that and her grief. She learned on the hellmouth in Sunnydale, so she learned how to control it first, before we would've taught her to use external powers. It was her first full spell working to close it."

"So she's powerful but probably blown open?"

"She doesn't know any other way. She can do massive things but has to burn a lot of energy off daily by doing things like fixing her hair by magic. Which got her nagged by the witches in residence at the slayer house."

The president looked at a few then at him. "Is that common?"

"They have varying power levels, the same as we do, but they learn to feel and harness the powers around them instead of focusing on a single wand. If you want to know if you can cross over, the answer is yes.

"Mr. Giles knows a few wand users and they got drunk and shared one weekend he said. Back when he was doing black magic things before he went to that same coven to heal." He smirked a bit. "He actually has a wand fitted to him but he doesn't use it." The president slumped, shaking his head with a sigh.

"They're not less powerful than we are. They can draw from a wider range of powers and they're on average probably stronger. I've got a meeting with one of the witches up there next weekend to see about that and any cross-training that could help the guards and aurors." He shifted.

"The demonic congress guard agreed with that. Their magic using people tend to be more powerful than human ones and Rosenburg rates about middle class of theirs he said. There's not many of them in the US, they really don't want to see a new witch hunt and about twenty years ago it was looking like one was going to start again thanks to some media things like movies."

The head of the congress shook her head slowly. "Why would they?"

"Books and movies with paranormal and magical things come out periodically and then religious sorts go after anyone with those ideas. Do you remember the whole panicking things about albums and musicians when you were little?" She nodded once. "Same thing then only new movies and books came out, got popular and attention, then got the heaving ones to start."

"All right," she said, then cleared her throat. "We don't want that. If Rosenburg is that powerful who knows what she'd do."

"It'd probably open at least one hellmouth, as she's had close contact and working with two, in a way that meant it couldn't be closed." He smiled a bit. "Those who were born near one may have a bit of an advantage of closing it if that does happen. Harris apparently has every single one of them try to pet him magically when he's near enough."

"Does he use magic?"

"No. Rosenburg said it goes wrong around him. The ones he worked with on that building cleanout said that he doesn't use magic but he does have a bit of instinctive skills from the radiation it filled him with that can mimic shielding and the like." The president moaned again. "But again, he's the guy defending Africa and training the slayers down there." He shrugged. "He seems like a normal enough guy, even with his visions."

"Like foresight?"

"Like sent visions, yes. Headache inducing from the guys on the tomb team reported when he had one up there. It kept them from opening a doorway before they had what they needed to end that portal and the being holding it open. Which actually took that one's mother showing up to nag him. And some backup weapons just in case. He told them about artillery."

That got a few blinks and a few nods. "Oh, dear," the head of the congress said. "So we'e totally miscalculated half of the world?"

"Not totally. We put ourselves on top for power when we're not. We've forgotten or never knew a lot of history that others had. The same religious sorts are going to scream a lot when they hear about ancient demon societies being there before humans took over thanks to them creating the first slayer." He smirked a bit. "She's in the slayer spirit. Each girl called is in it."

"Is that healthy for them?"

"No idea. Can't probably be ended without killing them all."

"Oh, charming," she said with a nod. "So these hellmouths?"

"Thin spots between realms." She winced. "We can open one that's not natural. We think we have one of those started but they stopped the one doing it. It's leaking but there's a slayer living next door to it. She calls it Flora because obviously it's a female. I have no idea how she'd know that part. I didn't ask."

"Shit," got muttered a few times.

"We need to get the research team down here."

The guard smiled and nodded. "Rosenburg suggested we do share information at some sort of conference. Us, them, the demonic councils. Humans if they can be polite and not scream at us. They have it tentatively scheduled for October because apparently the demonic take All Saints off by tradition but human magic users don't.

"She told us a charming story about a chaos sorcerer who changed their town's children into their costumes during trick-or-treat to raise power for Janus." The president went back to rubbing his forehead. "Bigger kids got assigned to go with them as a punishment. Harris went as a soldier. Rosenburg went as a ghost. Slayer Summers went as some seventeenth century lady according to her."

The president looked at him. "You're giving us all ulcers."

"Sorry, sir. I can only report on what I found out."

"Anything good you learned?"

"Most covens are reasonable beings, and a lot are women but not all. Herbalism is practiced by that sort. They do things very ritually. Rosenburg tends to make it up as she goes along and doesn't measure when she's doing potions. At all. I had to stop her from tossing in a handfull of moss into something she was working on because it'd go explosive and destroy the kitchen."

They stared at him. He grinned and nodded. "By the way, her parents are those psychologists most of us were worried were getting into our business but they never speak to her. Not since they got possessed once and tried to burn her at a stake." That got a weak moan. "And we're right about them, they will lead a charge to burn us all if they can because it's not logical to their way of thinking and they hate all that fantasy stuff."

"The same as we do," the president quipped. He leaned back. "Any other good news?"

"The banks are hiding their laughing at all of this. When I asked for a copy of whatever file they made on Harris, they just smirked at me as it was handed over."

"Charming." He looked around the group then at his guard again. "Anything else we have to know today?"

"The head auror will be one of those trying to attack covens and the slayers," he pointed out. "He was in the paper today sneering about all that. I did warn them. Miss Rosenburg scried him then pulled him to have a talk with him. He was rather horrified but I left my assistant there to bring him back when she's done talking to him about his stupid ideas."

The president nodded, rubbing his forehead again. "That may help or it may backfire." He looked around then at him. "The battles?"

"We have ideas, we have time to figure out if and where we can help, they said we can jump in and then flee again afterwards like the last one we jumped into."

"Okay," the president decided. "Figure that out and brief us next week. Go to that conference. Take a few scholars with you. In many disciplines if you can. Prepare a report about all that then."

One raised his hand. "How many realms did they say we connect to?"

"It depends on which hellmouth you're asking about. One has about fifty. One has probably two hundred but they didn't measure it exactly, just asked the people who used it." The guard smiled. "There's portal makers though. They help in immigration as well." That got a mass nod. "And some of our creatures are actually demonic species. My assistant asked about a few and the witches noted that they were peaceful demon species. And two that're crossbred to be less sentient but nice enough pets."

"Does their congress know that?"

"Probably. They didn't ignore as much as we have. The old Council ignored almost as much as we did though. If they couldn't own it, they considered it evil."

The president nodded. "Thankfully the new one is better?"

"Much. The slayers work with the local peaceful community. They even join them for kitten poker games."

One man winced, just nodding at that. "All right. That makes sense in a weird way. Thank you for that report. I believe I feel my wife trying to summon me home for drinks." He got up and walked off, going to talk to his wife. Who was a historian by training.

"She got very upset and wanted to rush up and nag the coven in Cleveland but he pointed out they were arranging a conference and they allowed some studying in the Council's library. She almost calmed down and started to call around. He texted someone to get a copy of those archeology reports for her. Which made her go on another rant but her former professors were wanting to see those papers.

***

Xander walked into the local magical school where he was, waving a letter. "I have an invitation for your headmaster."

The guardian on the doorway blinked at him. "You have no magic yet you do."

"I have hellmouth radiation." He grinned. "That's one purpose of the conference."

"I'll summon him." He looked up then at the human. "You are quite odd."

Xander grinned at him again. "Yes I am but I'm also the watcher training the local slayers so they can stay home." The guardian slumped and grimaced. "We changed since they blew up. We rebuilt it so it's good for the girls now. We're not anything like the old group." He nodded at the stern looking woman walking his way. "Ma'am, are you the principal?"

"The headmaster's on his way. Who are you? You set off our protections."

"Xander Harris. Watcher over the girls locally so they get to stay home and grow up being happy little girls."

She blinked. "That's not how it was done."

"No, those ones blew up so we rebuilt it the way it should be, so the girls are protected and trained and treated like humans."

"Oh. We hadn't heard anything on that."

"That's why we're hosting a conference," Xander said cheerfully. "So we at the Council, the magical community, and the demonic community can all meet and share information that needs to get around so people quit freaking out." He spotted a teacher and looked in his bag, pulling out a bigger envelope. "From Penelope at the Catacombs library?" The demon took it to read over. "We're hosting a conference."

"It's been the talk of the demonic community, Harris. And thank you for not radiating today."

"I try every day. Some days, though...." He shrugged. "Can't help the radiation." He smiled at the sour looking man stomping his way. "The Principal?" he asked. The man scowled but nodded. "Your invitation to the conference the Council is hosting between us, your community, and the peaceful demonic communities." He handed it over. "We've got people coming from the US's versions as well. I believe they wanted someone around here to talk about herbology or plants."

The headmaster opened it and read it then looked at him oddly. "Why would we ever do this?"

"Did you not hear that everyone got outed a few years ago?" Xander asked dryly. "Because they did. You guys, the peaceful and non-peaceful demonic communities, us." He shrugged. "There's been a lot of assumptions so we've been asked to share information that would solve some of that. Like thinking that the coven sorts are weaker."

"They don't exist," the woman laughed.

Xander and the demon both stared at her. "Yes they do. The Devon coven is still in existence. The US has about twenty smaller covens. All of which are more powerful than you guys are with your wands." He grinned again. "The MacUS president guy had to give a speech about that to stop the newest coven hunting going on because some of you got upset about 'old ways' and 'not modern' and all that."

He smirked. "They lost spectacularly because some of the younger witches got really upset and turned them all into things. Mostly trees but a few cats, a few dogs, one mule." The demon laughed and nodded. "That one was four though. He was worried they'd come for his mom. It was instinctive." The woman looked horrified. "Which is why we're holding a conference. So we can share things and you guys can share things and we all learn from each other." He looked at the demon. "Has Minnie found you?"

"I've heard but no. The temple hasn't sent her to see any of the trainers."

"Awww. She'll be upset. Though she did get the high priestess to play dollies and have tea parties so she had some happiness finally." He grinned at the horrified look. "So I wouldn't be totaly shocked. Also, have you seen the new archeo announcements?" He smirked before bowing and walking off.

"I hadn't." He pulled out his smartphone to look that up. "Oh, they found a few ancient demon cities. Including that bigoted human archeologist. He finally learned better." He walked off nodding. "I'd like to go if I can. I may be able to learn some new things that haven't filtered down to us yet. They're doing some fantastic studying of the hellmouths." The headmaster was spluttering but oh well. He was a hidebound ass anyway.

The teacher took the letter to read it over. "I dare say we can attend that to see what all this nonsense is about," she decided, going to talk to some of her friends in other countries by magic mirror. That night she had notes for her boss, and neither was happy. They hadn't heard about the outing or anything like it. They were no longer a hidden community by any means apparently.

***

Xander walked into one of the magical banks, smiling at the person who was sending people to other offices. "Ma'am, I'm Watcher Xander Harris. I have the bank's invitation to go to the conference we're sponsoring." He held it up with a smile.

The goblin stared at him oddly. "Why would we need to, Watcher Harris?"

He grinned. "Because a lot of the magical community had no idea about a few things we've known. Including about ancient demon societies. One of your digs got near one and got cursed apparently." He handed it over. "If you wanted to present at that time, we're more than open to it. I liked the guys I worked with on our former building in England, cleaning up the former idiots' mess from them being blown up. They said great things about you guys and your banking system."

"Oh. That's interesting. I'll pass this up, Watcher Harris."

"Sure. And if you guys have a problem, let me know. The team I worked with took my card so they have my cellphone number. I've got to be local for the next three months working with a new tiny mini that's just coming into her powers." He smiled again then left.

"That's weird." She read the letter then went to hand it over. "A Watcher Xander Harris had our invitation to a conference to share information that the magical community may be missing?"

He held out a hand with a nod. "Yes they are. Someone in the US outed the Council, the demonic communities, and the magical communities. The US wizards are concerned that witches in covens are more powerful." He smirked."

"He noted that one of our digs went near a demon city and we got cursed?"

"Yes we did." He sighed with a nod. "That happened in Egypt. That watcher nicely showed up and got our team free of it."

"That was pleasant of him. What did he want in return?"

"Not a thing. That's his job."

"Oh." She nodded, going back to her desk to think about that. Was this well known?

***

Xander walked outside of the hotel they had taken over for the conference, meeting the officers out there. "Hey, guys. I'm the Watcher over Africa's slayers." He grinned because a few stiffened. "It's our people hosting a conference this weekend.

"That way everyone knows what we know that can be shared so no one gets the wrong idea about parts of the demonic community or anything like that." He glared at a guy swaggering over. "Move it, Sparky, before I make sure you make it to the next apocalypse battle." The man backed off at that. He smiled at the officers again.

"We do have other formerly hidden community members in here but it's under a peace treaty even if they're harmful. Or snide in a few cases. The only way we'd react is if we're attacked and then I'll blow a bitch up." He glared at the swaggering guy. Then he smiled as he pulled out his phone to show off a battle video. "We're redoing that one next month if you want to join us.

"Their second son is coming this time instead of the first son that I beat so badly he begged for mercy and I refused it so he lived long enough to understand and spread the word not to try it again. His brother apparently wants me badly." He smiled at the officer again when that guy was heaving off to the side. "We're all here peacefully. Until people like that one."

"Understood," one of the officers agreed with a nod. "We were warned?"

"Slayer Syma told people up here. That was her duty."

"Okay. We can put a few officers casually around the hotel to make sure you guys don't get attacked for dealing with weird things."

Xander grinned. "Thanks. I could use a rest. I have a bunch of minis I'm training and most of them are under ten. They're driving me nuts." Someone tried to rush them so he pulled out his hidden battle axe and stared at them.

"Howdy, peoples of unknown but limited intelligence." They stared at the axe. One giggled. Xander used it to cut his gun into pieces. The man ran away from him. His buddies left too. Xander put the axe back with a grin and shrug for the officers. "You guys have fun with that sort?"

"Yes we probably will, sir," the other officer agreed with a nod and a smile. "Go rest."

"I'm going to help share intel." He went back inside. He smiled at the stomping director of SHIELD and the people behind him. "Mr. Stark, did you get the second one I sent up?"

"I did get that. Who found those?"

"A member of the peaceful community. They may have given them to a guy who deals to off-world battles, most of them are revolution sorts right now, but that one wasn't nearby."

"I can fully understand how people having a revolution for a good reason could use my weapons but I'd rather we knew when that happened instead of just guessing. Did you thank them for me after you used the few you did?"

"I did. It came in very handy too. Two feet tall, bright purple, and toxic to everything. They had to burn the whole forest down to get rid of it and two villages we helped rebuild."

"I can fully understand why they did that. Germs can be nasty."

"No, everything about them was toxic. The hairs were acidic and ate through the ground. Their blood was full of stuff that mutated rocks." Stark grimaced. "Yeah, they *had* to burn it. But we did help rebuild and the girls helped watch their animals since we had time to evacuate them for a few weeks."

"That's sweet of your girls. Are you here for this?"

"Yeah. I probably know some things that others don't." He grinned. "It happens a lot." He nodded. "We're starting the main greeting thing in the main conference room." He went that way. "Director, did you get your two idiots I shipped back out of their box and to quit crying?" he asked dryly.

"It took a few days," he complained. "Thank you for sending a report about why."

Xander looked at him and shrugged a bit. "She's a flirty goddess. I'm sure she wasn't amused she made them cry. She's a super nice lady. I see her healers a lot." He let them into the room and followed. "We have officers guarding the hotel," he told everyone.

"Hopefully no more yahoos." They smiled at that. Giles stared a bit. "Not like I brought artillery, Giles. I need it more down there. Though I did promise I'd let them come join our battles if they really wanted to come in." He sat down next to the archeologist. "How are you finding the garden?"

"It's very pretty. Trapping but pretty."

Xander smiled and nodded. "Yeah. Sylvia finally got home. Did you need another helper for the upcoming going back?"

"We're pretty well done with the garden. I don't know why we went."

"Didn't you find the catacombs?" Xander asked casually then smiled. "Or the library?"

The demonic archeologist stared at him. "There are?"

"Under Heldra's arch is a doorway. I have no idea how it opens but I stepped on it and a bit fell in so I looked. There's a staircase under it."

"Oh. I did not get that part of the email." He looked it up. "No, I didn't." Xander handed over his phone with what he sent. "Oh, no wonder. It probably cut it due to spam threat from the coordinates." He fixed it and resent it. "I'll have to check that. If I need Sylvia again I'll call her. She seemed sweet and like she liked the work."

"Her younger sister wants to be Indiana Jones but hates dirt. Sylvia was making her flee her talking to her parents by talking about slime."

The archeologist snorted but nodded. "There's much of that in the field." He handed the phone back. "Thank you, Harris."

"Welcome. Let me know if you need more than Sylvia. Catherine's in some sort of humanities study in England."

"I hadn't heard. I need to ask if she's in my field." He made that note.

Giles walked up in front of everyone. "Welcome. I figured we should talk to share information so all the miscommunication and misunderstandings are stopped before they harm someone." He smiled at the coven members. "If you want we'll start with some basics and move on to hear about newer things. I know we have a few here who do archeology and some of our field watchers." Xander grinned and waved, making a few moan. "Yes, including Xander. He had to alert us that a lot of the Ancient Ones are still around. Thankfully he used some manners."

"I have a letter for Witch Marcia from Heldra's high priestess," Xander noted loudly. "Something about flowers and tea." She looked back so he waved a bit. "It's in my suitcase."

She nodded and turned back around. "Can we start with the magical thoughts so some quit thinking we're just playing dress up, Rupert?"

"Yes, I believe that's a great place to start," he agreed, moving out of the way. The head of a few covens and the MaCUSA people came up plus a few others from other schools and governments. They held a great talk about the differences in magic. The magical community people were horrified but oh well! They learned what witches could and couldn't do, with them demanding proof so they did.

Xander stopped them at one point by standing up. "Do not even ask her to do a potion, people." Willow glared. "You can't measure worth a damn, Willow. And that potion has been stopped twice for being explosive. Let one of the other witches do it?" He sat back down.

"I do not do potions very well," Willow admitted, glaring at him. "But you're in trouble, Mister."

"Oh well! You nearly blew up Andrew last time." She muttered something. "As soon as you picked that up, my protections started to tingle like there was a demon invasion coming," he noted. She went pale and checked then let one of the witches neutralize it for her. "Thanks!" He grinned and waved.

Giles scowled. "Be more polite in front of important people, Xander."

"Sorry, Giles."

Giles sighed. "Willow is correct, her best area is not potions." The witches up there giggled and nodded but handled that for her. Willow could pout. They weren't going to let her hurt anyone.

***

The various magical community members met in a few adjoining rooms that night for their own meeting. "They do things we thought were fantasy," the head of the MaCUSA congress said. The others nodded and shared notes around that they had from other encounters.

"Perhaps we should hold one of these among all of us," the one from France said in accented English. "That way it spreads farther." He looked at the ones Xander had invited up from their magical school, who were all frowning. "We need to find a way to see if the newer magicals are our sort or their sort so they get appropriate training."

"Yes, they should," the headmaster agreed. "Some can use both." He looked around. "We may have to make a class about this, at least a single lesson." They nodded at that.

"England's schools are not friendly to that idea," one of the British aurors noted. "Hogwarts is in a tizzy about all this. Our minister has a perpetual headache from those looking to browse our shopping areas thanks to those books." A few nodded at that. "We need to see what their technology can mimic of ours as well. Because I'm afraid we weren't as hidden as we thought before all this. Our muggleborns warned us about technology and computers but we thought they were farther behind than they are."

"Harris and that one watcher both took what looked like magic mirror calls," the one from Africa noted.

"Video conferencing," the one from the US said with a smile. "We use it here sometimes. We can hold whole classes over it. We have a few students who tune in so they get lessons if they're sick at home. Though we do usually insist they use mirrors for that so no other student freaks out. We'd die if we still used quills like the Brits do in their schools. Even then we're probably a few years behind as well. Our bank does learn some of that for us and keep track of anything that could out us. I'm wondering how they missed those books completely."

"I doubt they read young adult books," the head of the US's academy said dryly. "I didn't but I think I should try to start or have a staff member start. Maybe a librarian." The others nodded at that idea. "Did the goblins seem upset to you?"

"They were," the one from England agreed. "The witches were showing off skills they can't do or mimic. Ones that could help their businesses."

"The short talk on hellmouths was weird but necessary," the head of the US congress admitted with a sigh. "We had the total wrong idea about those things. Even with being told that and going looking, they know a lot we don't."

The head of the African academy cleared his throat. "The historians tomorrow are going to make people scream. I'm aware there's older societies. We had two archeologists there today as well. One's the head of the demonic university in Egypt's archeology program. Harris favors him for finding and announcing things. Gave him a full demon city. And the human one got another one to make him stop sneering at the demonic community."

The others grimaced. "How bad can that be?"

"Demon cities were there first."

The people all stared at him. "Excuse me? Demons were here first?" one of them demanded. That headmaster nodded. "Are you certain?"

"Yes. I looked up that one's archeological papers. The Council knew, it's why they got formed, to fight that." He looked around. "Though it's nice they do work with the peaceful community now."

"Odd but nice," the head of the US congress agreed with a nod. "What do we do if we have a slayer in our population? Can they use magic?"

"I have no idea," the head of the French academy admitted. "We can ask. They're willing to help us." He went to get one of the witches. "We had a few questions, can you come talk to us?"

"Of course," she said, putting her lid on her travel mug of tea and bringing it with her. "I only had nagging Willow duty tonight to make sure she didn't go out to do odd things in the clubs and get hurt by some idiot." They stared at her.

"If she's attacked she's liable to attack back and cause quite a problem for everyone else as well. She does not have fine level of focusing on a single person unless she's very peeved at Xander." She sipped her tea then smiled. "They've known each other since the first day of school." They nodded at that. "What can I help with?"

"What are we to do if we have a slayer among our schools?"

"Slayers may come from a magical family," she said. "Though they cannot use magic themselves as far as we know. We haven't seen any in a few generations by the notes. Among us, they come a bit more frequently because we know about such things. Now the new Council lets them stay at home and train while making decisions about what sort of duty they'll have."
She took another sip. "Some girls decide to never patrol. It's not in them to do that duty. They'll protect their families, maybe a town if something happens, but they'll never be able to handle a patrol. They let the girls decide that themselves. The ones in college often cooperate to cover the college's problems and if they graduate and go to a regular career they fall back to battle only status usually from what they've told us."

"So the girls decide if they're going to patrol?" the head of the US Congress said. She nodded with a smile. "What if none do?"

"Some girls feel the duty very strongly. Like those who feel they're called to military service I suppose. Or legal services." That got a nod. "But not all the girls feel it that strongly. Many will patrol during college years and then retire once they have a career. And really it is harder to patrol for vampires in a club when you're thirty than when you're twenty-two."

"We don't have clubs like that," one admitted.

"They're *quite* an education," the witch said dryly. "Opened my eyes quite a lot. I had been meaning to chide some of the girls for going out in skimpy clothes. They were going to bait. I followed to make sure they didn't get the wrong sort of attention but that's what they were going for, from the vampires so they could hunt them." She grimaced. "It was not how we were brought up in my day but the girls have found ways of handling that duty as well."

"Do all the girls learn that? Even if it's not done in their areas?"

"They teach them in case they have to know because they opted to travel to another house," the witch told them. "But if it's not an option in their normal area they tend to just gloss over it and tell them to ask the older girls how to dance in a club. I know Harris will do it that way and then go over what's more normal for their areas. We heard him talking to one about belly dancing bars." A few sighed at that.

"She's up in the northern part of Africa so they're more prevalent up there. That way she understood all the environments she may need to hunt in. He also teaches them how to camp and do those things if they don't already know. Including teaching them how to make temporary but reasonable shelters if they're in the field and get lost or something." She finished her tea. "The ones in Asia get area specific lessons as well. Harris has said that there's no real staking vampires down in Africa, they're all beheading."

"That makes sense," one of the teachers agreed with a slight nod. "Could we have current pre-slayers in our communities?"

The witch smiled and shook her head. "Not unless they got missed on the location charm with the slayer essence. It hit a few places that blood from slayers but mostly the girls all got spotted. We do it once a year after the first. Willow and a few of us do it together."

"Then you'd send Harris out to alert us and the families?"

"Oh, dear, no. I like Xander, he's turned out a lot better than most of us thought. We thought him fairly rough and crude but he's not as bad as we thought. We'd send someone with tact. We alert the families and give them contact things so they can tell us happy news, plus things to read over, but protect the child long distance.

"When she's six or eight, we show back up to let her know and look over what her parents have done to help her future training, like martial arts classes and the like. That gives the girls the best chance at a happy childhood then we slowly introduce her to things and help her learn how to protect herself. She'll get demon lessons after puberty so she's not emotionally stunted.

"Xander's girls are more natural living as far as I know. He does hover over a few of them but they've been threatened. He does things like show up to make sure they're doing educational things and handle any problems in their areas. Their parents or someone alert him to something going on so he shows up, goes over their homework with them and teaches them things they'd get in self defense classes, plus handles things."

"So the girls are encouraged to be happy young women," one said with a smile.

"Yes. It seems to work. They're also encouraged to have friends, including some that may help them with limited parts of their duty. It worked for Summers. Xander brought her back to life once. Apparently she had been drowned and that created a second slayer. The girls are much happier now that there's more than one doing the duty at a time and with the upbringings they're getting.

"Even the girls in the house who don't have other families make one out of the other girls and some of the support people they have around them. Though Giles does encourage them to find out if they do have family still living. He's insistent on it the last I heard."

"That's good for the girls then. Much better than it had been," the one from England said. The witch smiled and nodded. "How do your sort of witch tell if a child has a gift? We use things from books that track magical sparks and lineages to people who alert us if there's accidental magic going on."

"Sometimes they find us. There's a ton of books written by the meditative sort who use the name and the craft but can't do actual magic. If we find one that has magic we'll tend to feel it if they're near us and show up to talk to them about it. A few of us also substitute teachers so we may find one that way. Though we have had an epidemic of jealous girls who turned their rivals into pets and sent them to the pound." She huffed at that. "We've been wearing ourselves out checking pounds."

"We'd go to jail for that," the one from England told her.

She smirked a bit. "Yes but you haven't caught three of yours. We had a talk with one of the girls." He winced at that. "Belinda, the one with the henna colored hair, had that talk. Her mother was of the opinion that it was jealous girl things. Which it was. But it did nearly get a few killed. Her mother got her the meditative books and started to teach her about not being a jealous pre-teen girl." She cleared her throat again. "Her mother was horrified that a coven found out about her daughter."

"Oh, dear. A noted family?"

"Jerrols?"

"Slightly," the auror agreed. "I'll go check on her myself." He made himself a note. Then sighed. "That's got to be a modern problem."

"One of the demons in Cleveland said that they had once stopped Willow from accidentally sending someone back to Ancient Greece when she was mad at them." That got a few moans and a single nod from the auror. "Magic can be emotionally led at times. Especially in teenage girls." She smiled at the teachers in there. "You have a lot more fun than I probably do."

"Can wand users do that? Temporal spells are considered forbidden and extremely difficult."

The auror looked around someone at them and nodded. "We've had two recorded. We got them bounced back. It's as hard as banishing someone." That teacher winced. "Teenagers are traditionally emotional and unknowing so we just don't tell them it's possible. That way they don't consciously do it." He sat back again.

"We do the same thing, though the girls have usually been taught that their connection to the natural magics will guide them if something's unethical. We try to make sure they have good natural connections but not all practioners would have that sort of connection. Some do connect better to chaos or to air or to planetary powers even.

"Thankfully most of them haven't grown up...wrong minded. Though some do turn later on. And some turn back. Magic addiction is bearable once you break it, the same as alcoholism is. But one can backslide as with any addiction."

"Is that's why Rosenburg's so heavily watched?"

"Yes. The girl grew up without great parental assistance. Hers were ...I believe I can call them absent frequently without swearing."

"The ones on the news shows," one said. The witch smirked and nodded. "No wonder she grew an addiction."

"Yes, and she's had other problems because of her upbringing. Thankfully we helped her fight a great many of them and she's aware of backsliding. Now and then we have to point it out to her but she'll end it on her own these days. It's a struggle as any addict can tell you."

"I've seen some. Muggle drugs tend to render magic undoable."

The witch smiled and patted him on the hand. "Only a few. Opium had that effect but many do not. Including pot. That can actually make it easier to access other methods of power." He groaned. She smirked and nodded. "Willow got high one night at a club without realizing it. She came home calling on spirits.

"Thankfully she didn't bring anyone else back to life but she was surrounded by spirits. Including some who were in a coma in a nearby hospital. We got them all sent back and asked Xander if he knew how to block that off as he's easily possessed. He sent up a few meditations and some herbs to do with that, plus suggested she talk to a Buddhist monk or Native shaman about those issues. He talked to many about his."

"He can be possessed?"

"Yes," the one from the aurors in England said firmly. "The tomb team had to make sure a few of the things they found couldn't get him. They tried a lot." He smirked at the witch. "He held off most of them without help."

"That's great news! The boy got possessed by walking into someone's working circle. Someone wanted to be a native shaman and merge with a spirit hyena."

The auror raised an eyebrow. "Huh." He made a note to get a copy of that file so he could see if others needed that sort of help. "How did he learn?"

"They have native healers and shaman down in Africa. We assume he talked to them. If not maybe learning some things at the ancient temples he's found. Apparently he's very nice to the ancient beings in them."

"There's still ancient Gods?" the auror demanded.

"Yes, we were all amused as well," she said with a smile. "He talks to a few who have helped the girls more than once. One of them stopped a battle by showing up and slapping her former boyfriend for standing her up for a date. Totally stopped him causing a problem by ranting and slapping him across the face." She grinned. "We were all amused that night."

He nodded. "Me too." He rubbed his forehead. "Does anyone have a real idea of what the boy's done?"

"Ask the demon community. Their poker circuit may if they're betting on it. Or if some other realm's been paying attention to him." She smirked. "He'd be a boring tele show but you never know."

"I can do that." He made that note for himself in the morning. "Can we do watcher things?"

"I suppose you could," she admitted. "It's a lot of learning and backing the girls up. You'd have to be able to help them learn how to handle battles and probably fall in for a few. Perhaps not with magic though. Many of them seem to require swords, crossbows, and artillery. Harris works with a few militaries and one's training the other militaries in the region so they can fall in and hide things.

"I heard one country said that a battle did not happen and would never happen. Though I've heard rumors that it was because they were all rendered naked during it. I suppose they didn't want to be seen to be waving two swords at that time." A few laughed at that idea. "Harris!" she called. He knocked and leaned in a minute later, still chewing, and made a humming noise. "If they wanted to handle battle things, who's training the militaries down there?"

He swallowed. "General Kalini in Mali's military. He's trained some agents too." A few made notes of it. "A lot of being a watcher is being a lecturing big brother sort. It really is. I talk to the girls about sensible things and help them with normal girl things. And I protect them from idiots. Human and demonic idiots at times.

"If you wanted to do that, go for it. We could use more. I could use backed up because I'm the only guy doing the slayers in Africa." He grinned at one. "Though your brother's helped a few times." He beamed before going back to his room.

She smiled at them. "Summers does the same thing with her minis. She big sisters them, nags them about homework, all that."

The others nodded at that. "We may have some people who'd do good with that. I'll have to ask around." He looked at the others then at her. "So you don't have formalized education."

"No, we have guidelines we teach and if they want to learn a skill they can ask. Or if we see they need taught a skill we'll do that. Though none of us have been able to teach Willow how to measure a single thing so far. She does the same thing with cooking." She sighed at the end, shaking her head. "Tea making as well."

"Could she learn to like a wand?"

"I don't think she'd use it more than ceremonially and she's not really suited to formal styles of magic. We've tried to get her to help with rituals. She either focuses everything on it, and overpowers everyone else, or her attention will drift." That got a mass nod. "I'm rather worried she'll find something new to learn in one of the demon cities being uncovered." She sighed again and stood up. "We can chat more tomorrow. I need more tea." They smiled and a few thanked her on her way to get more tea.

The one nearest the door shut it. Xander knocked and opened it then handed in a card. "The one who hides it in the Brit military and the one in India's military in case anyone needs to talk to them. At the bottom is the name of the professor over the Watcher trainees at the traditional college." He grinned and left them to talk.

"Ladies, I believe we have a bedtime," he called to a group in baiting clothes. "None of you are able to handle a New York club hunt. The local girls won't do those because it's a lot more dangerous than the ones anywhere but Miami and LA's." The girls groaned.

"If not, take one of the McDougal watchers with you. They're military trained and can save you from human idiots." One ran to get one of those two and went off with him and the local slayer. Xander patted her on the arm, getting a grin from her. "I'm out of clubbing practice," he quipped.

The younger McDougal nodded at that. "We went with the LA slayer a few times," he admitted. "I never want to see another minor actor turned." The girls asked him about that. They loved gossip.

The magicals in the rooms shared a look and went back to figuring out how to work things out with this new information.

***

The British auror stood up in front of the entire Ministry personnel and the heads of the major schools of magic in their kingdom. "All right. Just been to the conference those Council people sponsored so we could share information." He clapped his hands together then smiled.

"We've been blown open longer than we thought thanks to some books we didn't know were out." He looked at the Muggle department, who looked clueless. "Yeah, about a certain Boy." One winced. "Also, we're wrong on a lot of stuff." He presented all the information he had learned. Both about the other magical communities of theirs and the covens. About the demonic communities and the differences between them.

He also told them about the UK Demonic Council, their version of the USDC. He told them about the Council sorts and their issues, including that they had a rip that wasn't a full hellmouth up-country and that the Devon coven guarded it. That got a lot of frowns as he went over what a hellmouth really was and what it did and didn't do.

The Minister stood up at the end. "So you're saying that magic is more known than we thought." The auror nodded with a grin. "That we've got demonic presence in our countries but they're peaceful for the most part." The auror nodded again, still smiling. "And that the Council people know how those rips form but can't stop them?"

"No one can stop them. They described them like stretchmarks. Like our wives got with our kids." The minister sat down with a sigh. "I did stop by to talk to our demonic council in the area earlier before I got here. They keep this area very peaceful and the local slayers only have to handle new vampires. Which is nice since she's over here to go to college.

"Also, the coven was most amused that we've limited ourselves by learning a wand." He turned on the video from that talk, which he was running by magic. They watched it and the demonstrations and the measurements they took.

The Minister hopped back up. "Hold on." He paused it. "First, how are you doing that?"

"Mirroring spell from the tv since it's so small. Basically projecting it. I learned from the MaCUSA head auror. They use it in court cases."

"They can do that regularly?"

"We could do that regularly. It's not a use we thought of for the mirroring charm."

"Oh." He blinked a few times. "How did they record that?"

"Camera. They have all sorts of taping abilities. Magical and not. That's from the magical tape system the USDC actually set up so everyone could download a copy of everything to bring home." He grinned. "Gringotts was amused too. They have some of this stuff but not all of it."

The minister looked confused. "There's a lot more like that?"

"Yes." The minister slumped again, looking at him. "We can go over that later." He went back to the film for them.

"Who's the redhead?" one of the lesser aurors called.

"Rosenburg. She self taught through stolen books." The head auror grinned at him. "She's in treatment for her magic addiction. Fighting it hard. But we were all told she does not measure a single blasted thing. Not a potion, not a recipe, not a single thing." He went back to it and then showed another incident. Some yahoo had tried to break in to remove the unholy slayers from the hotel.

Rosenburg had been reading in the lobby and had casually floated them and kept them up there while they screamed, cried, and begged to get down. She had actually seemed to forget about them until some guy came out, sighed, and called out for her to let the idiot down so they could have him arrested. She went 'oops', flicked her hand so he fell, then went back to getting her lunch. The head auror smiled at his people. "We are not going to bother any coven members. We can learn to get along with them."

"They're scary and powerful," the minister agreed with a nod. "Can they all do that?"

"Yeah, probably. There's some levels of abilities going on but yeah, the top ones can. They're also complaining that they're tired of going to pounds to find changed people thanks to jealous teenage girls. Peterson, how's your sister?" he asked, smirking at him.

"I beat her so hard she's given up even using a wand, boss," he quipped. "Dumb little quim deserved it and Mum said she couldn't get her to see reason because she's a teenage girl. Is she the only one?"

"Nah," he said with a smirk. "Two others among us. Another few among theirs. Mostly teenage girl things." A few nodded at that. "We figured out how to tell their magic from ours and we have a pebble that'll read it. We're going to assign someone to go to each pound at least twice a week to get anyone changed so they can be changed back by someone, us or them." That got a nod from his aurors.

He tossed one the stone, getting him to look at it and make copies. "Thank you." He looked at his boss again. The minister was looking upset again. "We and they feel and use the magic differently. They feel it around them, in them, all that. Like babies will play with the magic glowy things they can feel around their cribs? They never quit doing that and can draw on that.

"They try to get them all to use some sort of natural force but not all people are drawn to it. Some are naturally drawn to chaos. Without being evil. As pointed out, chaos is a part of the natural life, the same as decay is." A few slumped at that. "Basically we're working out how to tell theirs from ours for schooling. They don't do a formalized school but will train skills if theirs need it or want it. Though no one can apparently teach Rosenburg to measure anything."

He clapped his hands and smiled again, turning on another section. "We can have slayers born among us. Hasn't happened in a while though." He let them watch that. "No one's sure if those ones can use magic or not. It might stunt their growth magically. No one's sure what the slayer spirit does to 'em when they're that young. They showed off how to do the locating charm and the nearest we have is from a coven related family up north by that thin spot that's not quite a rip that the coven watches over."

"So they're powerful enough to do major magical works," the head of the Department of Misuse of Magic said as she stood up. The head auror nodded at that. "And we never find out?"

"Nope. Apparently not. Unless you've seen them doing things like working circles?" She shook her head and sat down. "Then again, our measurement devices are ages out of date. The Americans gave up using them but the ones in Germany are aces and within ten years old. Ours are their granddaddy's version." That got a sigh and a nod. "We might also want to look at the education stuff. We're behind."

The minister winced at that. The head of the Department of Education glared. He held up a hand and tossed him a book. "From your counterpart in Germany, who came for the talk, and the one from the US when I asked. They asked and I asked to get a copy too. They wanted to compare to the US's schools. We're at least two years behind them."

He read it and moaned. "Oh, no."

"Oh, yes. And their schools use regular tech that's been changed to run on magic. The main US school has computers." The headmaster winced at that. "So does Canada but they use a lab room full of them that the students can use as needed instead of personal systems like they do in the US." He smirked at them. "The idea of quills made them all shudder in horror. So did handwriting papers. Even the ones here at the Ministry are done by typewriter. We should upgrade the students to that standard?"

"Computers use the same keyboard design," one of the junior people said. "It's the earlier form of computers. Which were built on the back of weaving styles with their cards." He grinned at one, who huffed and paid him for that bet. He pocketed those coins. "They have computers that can run everything."

"They have a system in their phones that you talk to and it turns things on and off or looks up things for you," the head auror corrected, making a few wince. "I had one of the teachers there pull out hers to look up a deli for lunch yesterday. I asked. Their virtual assistants can look things up, start your car, start your oven, your washer, your lights, all that stuff if you want to upgrade everything.

"We here in our magical community are living in the early parts of the twentieth century. It's the twenty-first. The US is still a bit slow on technology things but they're about a decade behind instead of a century." The minister whined again, shaking his head. "I'm not saying we have to upgrade but we need to look at these things and plot a course at least.

"Also, their WWN has merged with a tele station in most of Europe. Radios are for music mostly. Not news." A few winced. "We're behind and we knew very little about some things we assumed. Also, we're wrong on history." A few stared at him. He nodded. "Real wrong. The Council people had written records in some of the first languages about how the slayer line got started. Including demon cities. Which archeologists are finding again.

"Harris led them to a few in Africa so they could go over them and announce it so people wouldn't panic when this got out." He pulled out a copy of those reports to hand to a few people. "I asked, they had a file on Merlin. Called him a snotty nosed little bitch." He grinned at the head of the history archive. Who was looking horrified.

"He was their sort, not our sort. The grandson of one of the coven that became the Devon coven via her adopted daughter." He went back to the stage. "People are going to freak out and yell. They've tried to yell at the Council sort and had to get put back in their places." He waved a hand at the prior video to end that spell. "That's why they held the conference."

"So we'd quit assuming and others would quit freaking out," one of the under ministers sighed. The auror nodded. "Everyone okay there this weekend?"

"We had a few people that Harris called yahoos. One of them let me ask him about what that tube thing he had did. They have weapons that can destroy a whole building and it's hand-held. Shoulder mounted, but carryable." His aurors all stared at them. "Harris doesn't know all about them but he's had to use a good bit in Africa. They have bigger ones too."

He looked at the Minister. Who waved a hand. "We should ask about those to see if it's something we need to come up with wards against." The minister waved a hand again, rubbing his face with his free hand. "We need to liaison with our counterparts in England's governments. Their chemistry stuff has at least sixty elements ours don't.

"The Watcher program at Oxford is willing to talk to us, and willing to let some of us train to be watchers if we want. I asked our person up there if they knew that professor. Then I got them together. They both thought the other was a crackpot until they found out what they were over. They're talking and drinking for days probably."

The minister stood up again. "So we need to look ahead, make some plans, figure out how we're going to manage being so far behind, see if things will work for us or if we need to figure out whole new solutions the other countries don't use yet, and deal with things that the muggleborns see daily that we don't?"

"Yup." The head auror nodded with a grin. "Sure do, boss." He looked at one he knew was muggle born. "You?"

"Oh, I saw most of it and I laugh each time the Muggle Department people think about things that're basic and came out over a century ago," she admitted. Then she smiled. "And yes, I do adore my home computer. I can type a whole lot of notes within a few minutes and save it multiple places that no one will ever find." The others in her department looked at her. She shrugged.

"I grew up with a PC for doing homework on. Looking up anything interesting on the internet, all that." She smiled at the head auror. "I've suggested ours actually go visit some muggles more than once. Even let them go see my mother and father because they were used to hearing me complain about hand-writing papers."

"We were very confused about many things but I felt it was rude if we asked what things were," one of those said. "What is that thing they were staring at at night?"

"Television or tele," she said with a slight nod. "It shows programs, like radio programs, but they're in pictures so you listen and watch. What he was doing the mirroring charm off of. Been around since the 1930's to show Wimbledon. Showed the Queen's first address and coronation." She shifted in her seat to look at someone. "If we're going to upgrade we need to look at the issue of electricity. Everything runs on electricity." She turned back around. The head auror was nodding at that. "How was the hotel?"

"Very nice. Not one of those high class places they talk about in mags but nice. Nice restaurant, nice people mostly. Confused people who cleaned the rooms but very comfortable beds and tubs. Very nice place. Not a single house elf in there either. All human employees."

A few looked startled. "They're not real common in the US at all. They're protected so if they show up at your house you take them in but once they're yours they're the ones who have to want to leave to go and you can't harm one. It's against the law. You can't hit them, throw things at them, or yell at them."

"That's insane," one of the magical creatures people complained. "Seriously?"

"Seriously. They protect household animals with anti-cruelty laws and house elves too." He shrugged. "We can meet with the ones in the US so you can see what they're doing and other countries too if you want to arrange it. I'd suggest it. We all need to do one for each department. Including with Canada."

He grimaced. "The Canadian aurors showed up for the second day of the talks so those of us who were guards or aurors talked to them. They had been invited and blew it off." He smirked. "They seriously think we're backwards."

The minister nodded. "I agree, we should hear what other countries know that we don't. Especially with the security risks thanks to tourists." He looked around. "Find some way to hold a conference for each department. Either a call, a meeting, whatever. Bring back a list of differences, a plan to look at why they have them and how they had to change things from what we have. See if there's anything we're ahead on."

"We have more potions people," the head auror quipped.

"Beyond that?"

The head auror shook his head. "We have nice librarians. Even Rosenburg praised good English librarians, which made a few of the coven blush. Guess they are in their normal lives. We have bigger estates sometimes. Countries have differences but some of them...we're behind. We barely have zippers."

"The clothing ones?" someone asked. He nodded. "They do?"

"And other fasteners. Including this stuff that merges together." He showed them on the new knife case he had found and bought. "That's called velcro. It's woven that way to hold cloth together. Including some shoes having it instead of tying." She looked disturbed. He nodded. "They don't tend to go to places that hand-make clothes like we do. Madam Malkins would be a rare treat for those who're wealthy, not regular folks. It's got its drawbacks too but even their magical community's healers work with regular doctors for things like organ transplants. Do we?"

"I've read up on them but no. We don't work with a muggle hospital." The head healer for the ministry nodded, smiling at everyone. "He's right. I've been keeping up with my fellow trainees and the ones who went to muggle medicine had to nearly go all the way back but they can do some great things. We can heal a cut almost instantly and they use stitches but they can do things we can't. A lot of things we can't. And a lot that take electricity." He looked at him. "Did you have to talk about any of my area?"

"Some of the witches did go over healing things with each other. Not with us. There were a few covens, and some internationally. They shared recipes and news on things like new designers and those who make them altar stuff. Plus some fashion stuff. Most of them wear muggle clothes. They have working robes for magical stuff."

"I change when I get home too," the healer decided. "Potions heavy I'm betting?"

"And teas." He nodded. "They were mostly at least parent aged."

"That figures. Are they having a problem keeping the younger involved?"

"Not really. They seem to float about more and if they're interested they'll practice with the coven and if not they can practice at home or not at all and come back to it when it's important."

"That figures," he decided. "Some of our muggle borns do the same thing." The minister looked at him. "There's not a full place for them here."

"I'm realizing that." He looked at his head auror. "Your people are going to talk as well."

"We're doing it in February with some of the ones down south so it's somewhere warming than we get or DC gets." He smirked. "We're thinking Mexico. They'll set it up and let us know."

The minister smirked. "That's not a bad time to get away from the snow." He looked at the teachers, who were all looking upset. "Is there an education conference?" One nodded. "Let us know when and give us a report about what you find out. Maybe it'll lead to new classes and new paths. Or doing student switches if they want that sort of program and we don't have it."

"Maybe," the headmaster of Hogwarts said quietly. "Do the covens use wards?"

"Yes. Rune wards. Fairly strong. It kept Rosenburg from sneaking out to go to a club. They decided it'd be a bad thing to show off. Harris had to go after a few slayers that had went clubbing because the watcher with them got into a bar brawl with something. He had to go help him get to an ER, help the girls get the problem, then get them back to the hotel without nagging them a lot.

"Clubs there are much different than ours. Even the muggle ones in London." His eyes went wide and then he cleared his throat to clear his expression. "Their city offices are linked in with their police departments and they wear usual uniforms but wear a special pin to identify each other." He coughed again.

"Tell us what you learned this weekend in a report and what you learn from other meetings," the minister said with a nod, looking around. "That goes for the rest of you. We'll start going over ideas next month. Maybe they have some good ones we can borrow and tweak to fit our needs." They nodded. "Can that coven rune Diagon?"

"Yes they can and they'll be here tomorrow morning to do so."

"Excellent! I like that." He got up. "Everyone go have your headaches in peace. Call around to your counterparts, set up friendly relations again." They all nodded, walking off talking to each other. The teachers still looked upset. He went to his office to have a fit, have a drink, and have some headache potion. In that order. Then he settled in for a nap. He had a lot of work to oversee.

***

Slayer Catherine followed Xander's written directions with the archeologist with her. "Let's see, he said to stand here," she said, looking around to make sure. She stepped onto the same spot, hearing a grinding noise. "He said that'd happen, I'd find a stone that fell in." She looked and pushed dead leaves away with her toes. She found it and knelt down to look. "Here we go, stairs." She smiled at the archeologist. "Like Xander said he found."

He knelt down to stare at it, then let her deploy the camera on a string so he could see what was down there. "It's got a marking that usually meant human slaves," he said. "Hmm." He let her take out a sharpie and draw that on her hand, the usual spot for them. She felt drawn to a pole on a nearby archway that was decorative and put her hand on it. That opened the actual doorway so they could go see. He helped her erase it once they were down there safely. It was a storage area for slaves to live in. It had a lot of drawings. She sighed in pleasure, going to look at them. "Don't touch them," he warned.

"I know." She held up her phone to use the flashlight. "We have...looks like rituals?"

He came to look. "That is a ritual. Hmm. I'll get proper lights and cameras to take information from down here." He hurried off to get what he needed and his assistants.

She smiled and nodded, moving to look at another section. The first student came down. "The goddess figure is pointing at the dark haired ones and then all the dark haired ones were taken to a temple looking place. It looks kinda sacrificial, Professor."

He came to look. "I've heard myths of that. They prayed to their goddess to mark the ones who were worthy and sent the others away." She grimaced. "So that's why they were here as slaves maybe." He lit up the rest of the area to look at the whole story mural. Including some later ones. "That's...Elemite?" He got out of one student's way. "Wayne?"

He looked then nodded. "Yeah, Prof, that's Elamite or Susian." He frowned as he read it over, skimming a finger just above the surface. "That's stupid. Their goddess decreed any with dark hair were unworthy but she couldn't hold many more sacrifices so she let her friends take some as slaves, or her highest priests got some." He backed off. "That's a language from third millennia BCE though."

"Late for that sort of religion," Slayer Catherine said with a slow nod. "From what the lessons said, most of them were banished or quiet by then." She looked at the professor.

"There were a few closed in enclaves," he admitted. "But mostly they were banished at least a millennia before then." He frowned. "Are we possibly looking at two different time periods?"

"Can we see if Xander knows about that goddess to see if she's got someone still around so we can ask?" Catherine asked.

The professor stared at her oddly. "Are there that many still around?"

"Xander knows about eight. It doesn't hurt to ask. They might've left books or something." She looked at the one who could understand that language. "Do we have a name?"

He frowned as he read over it. "My...it's been trimmed out mostly. It starts with my and looks like it ends in an o sort of sound. Oh."

She sent that to Xander, who sent back he'd ask since he was near the library anyway. "Give him a few to write the librarian he knows."

A few minutes later she got a message from an unknown number and two possibles. She wrote back that they had human slaves and something about dark haired humans. That one sent back the myth that involved that and said that no one could prove that it existed. She let the professor see it with a grin. He identified himself when he sent one back to them. They sent him a message of scanned in sheets and he sent pictures of those symbols and the writing.

They figured out who it was, that she was dead now, a slayer had ended her early on in her reign. She had been trapped by a stupidly granted wish to someone who had won one in a contest, and she had mostly farmed them out to others without sacrificing them because she felt her people were shallow. The professor showed them all and they all groaned but nodded at that information.

He noted that they had found the slave quarters under that garden thanks to Xander finding a staircase. The librarian said a lot of beings thought Xander was cursed to prove all sorts of beings inferior by being himself and chaotic. The professor laughed but agreed he did do a great job of it. The slayer nodded, going to look at the other walls. Xander was good at that.

***

Xander got told that thought by the librarian and snorted. "I am not a moron finder," he complained quietly to his phone. He sent back a pouty faced emoji to that librarian, getting a patting one back. He sighed, putting his phone back. "He found the staircase I found by accident," he told the goddess near him. She stared at him oddly. "The librarian at the research desk up-country said I'm cursed to be able to prove a lot of beings inferior by being myself."

She patted him on the shoulder. "Yes you were, Xander." She walked off giggling. "You prove it each time you run into people with ideas or plans and make them figure out they're not worthy."

He blushed, walking the other way shaking his head. It just happened around him, it really did. He didn't try to do that. It really just happened.

The End.
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