Weird Old Lines. by Voracity2

Weird Old Lines.

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In DC the next afternoon, someone looked up then screamed as his skull split thanks to the battle axe that came down through it. Xander landed behind him, shaking his head. "I don't think you're playing nicely and I don't like what you did." He got the other two coming with acid shot bullets, making them scream as the acid ate through their necks. It was unprotected by body armor. Xander ducked and shot the one trying to get him from behind. That guy's face may never recover.

"Oh, hey, I recognize you from one of the visions. You're one of that Captain Guy's backup team. Wow, were they trying to train you better, Rumsy or whatever he called you?" He walked over them and whistled as he went inside the building. "Move! Council business, people." The agents stared and slowly got out of the way. He nodded at one of the agents. "Not here for something you probably heard about. Someone decided to try to kill a nursery and kids hospital that we protect." He walked into the meeting room.

Someone shouted and moved away from him but Xander got the ones he wanted. "Never, ever, touch what the girls protect. They're awfully proud of how that hospital for baby demons is run and how much good work they get out of fussing over them." He sneered at the bodies. "You never, ever, touch what the girls protect. They can't take a life but I've seen worse than you." He looked at the ones that tried to run from him. "If I was here for you, you'd already have heard.

"And yeah," he said, staring at one. "I'd confess before someone finds that file where you tried to start the Initiative project in Asia." He walked off, axe on his shoulder. He went to the clinic and helped the clean up, smiling at the nurses. "It won't happen again. Dawn was pouting very hard and thinking about trying magic to stop them." He grinned. "I took a proactive approach to stop that bad idea in the making."

"She has power but that would probably create an apocalypse worse than the Red Witch's few ones," the nurse said quietly, glancing around.

"Willow's trying to stalk Kennedy and talk to her about why she's become such a problem bitch. Kennedy knew for a few months and didn't warn London at all." The nurses hissed and a few winced. "Oh, yes. Much. Thankfully I nagged and one of the others did."

The nurses shook their heads but let him finish the cleaning up so they could get their patients back.

***

Dawn smiled at the agents there to harass her. "Hi, guys. Sweet day isn't it?"

"Miss Summers, we need to talk."

Dawn tipped open her hand, letting the potion in it flow out around her. "Sure, we can talk."

"What's that?"

"A potion of protection."

"Will it really help you against us?" the other agent asked.

"Yup."

One pulled a gun to shoot at her and the foam coming up from the portal ate it. "Oh."

She smiled. Dawn laughed a tiny bit. "Yeah, oh." She waved at the cops speeding up. "Guys, I'm Council related. These ones want to kill me."

"Miss, come out of that circle," the officer there first demanded.

She stared at him. "No fucking way in hell when they're trying to kill me for my sister being a slayer." The officer winced. "They're some of the bad ones, yeah." She waved a hand and the bullet's remains dropped. "I'm having a bit of I'll be damned here, Officer."

"Miss, if they want to arrest you they can," the officer said.

"They don't want to arrest me. They want to assassinate me. If they actually meant me no harm they could cross the protections."

"We can wait," the first agent said. "It'll run out."

Dawn smiled back. "If you kill me, I've got it arranged to come back as an avatar of 'oh damn' as others put it. Which means I'll be taking out every single one involved, all the way back to the head guys who ordered it."

"You're not that important. They wouldn't have cared about you outside of your sister," the first agent said then smiled. "You're just a pawn."

She smiled her most beautiful smile. "You have no idea who I really am. You just proved that. Because I'm the starting off of an apocalypse if you kill me." The agents stepped back. "As in literal hell is coming to pay." The protection circle faded into smoke. She stepped out toward the officer. "If they had a *warrant* to arrest me, shouldn't they have done that instead of shooting at me?"

"Yes," he said, staring at her. "I will arrest you for doing magic."

"I didn't. I spilled a potion." One of the other officers tried to shoot at her. It got stopped. "That was magic but it's not mine." She held up her pendant with a grin. "Willow made it for me. She thinks I'm always in danger and people want to keep kidnaping me like they did when I was fourteen." She shrugged and let her pendant go. Xander walked over, axe in hand. "Hi, Xander." She hugged him, kissing him on the cheek. She put the pendant over his head.

He handed it back. "You need it more than me. If I get killed here, so be it and I'll make an excellent avatar of justice." The agents shook their heads, moving back. Xander smirked at him. "Hi."

"Is that blood, sir?" one of the other officers asked.

Xander nodded, smiling at him. "These two and a few others led an attack on a nursery last night to draw me into the open. So now I'm here and they're mostly sorry except for these two and one in hiding." He held up a paper. "Someone made me a list." The officer shuddered.

Dawn took the list to look at, nodding. "Three names." She handed it back and then looked up. "Fuck this shit." She walked off, cutting her palm. "You vowed on your virgin blood to protect me and mine," she said, looking up. "I'm calling in the marker. Fuck. This. Shit." A thunderclap went off and a being in chains appeared. She stared at him. "You vowed to protect my cute ass once."

He stared at her then his mouth opened and he sucked in a breath. "I have," he admitted in a growl.

She walked over to stare at him. "Will you take me to my sister's burdens?"

"Yes. If you could unhook me?"

Xander looked. "Why don't I trust this any?" he asked dryly, staring at Dawn. "Really? You had to go there already, Dawn?"

She pointed behind her. "I felt something huger appear. I don't want to be here when it gets here." She smiled. "Let me pick those locks." She touched a finger to the locks and they fell apart into dust. So did the rest of the chains. He smirked and his clothes changed. "Now, let's go. Officers, you're going to want to move. Now." She pointed behind them again. "It's coming and it's not happy."

Xander looked. "Now, people. Move!" He shot both of the agents in the ankle. "You two can pay for trying to kill Dawnie by helping." He looked at the officers. "Now. Right now." They saw the demon and scrambled off.

"Toodles, dear," Dawn quipped. "Let's go." Loki took her off. "Thank you."

"Thank you for freeing me."

She smirked. "Willow needs some advice. I figured you're a great one to give it."

"The redheaded one?" he demanded.

"Yup, her. That's where we're going."

"She's obvious."

"And in a pissing match with a few Asgardian warriors who're guarding the slayers."

Loki groaned. "Wondrous."

"At least your brother isn't there yet."

"Can you open a portal?"

"I cannot use any of that thing's gifts. It's all locked up." She smiled. "The monks made sure of it."

Loki looked at the demon then nodded. "That's truly pleasant of them." He created a portal and got them to where the massive spike of power he could feel was.

Dawn smiled and pointed. "Huge ass demon but I didn't want to deal with Perry today. Sorry to barge in. Willow, he can give you some advice you need. Can you?" She huffed but took him off. The portal snapped closed.

"Kreth, this is Dawn," one of the slayers said.

"Dawn," the head warrior said.

Dawn smiled and shook his hand. "I was in safety in DC but then Perry showed up and he kinda owns some realms and really thinks I'm cute. Which I am, but not that way." She shook her head. "But Xander was there." The slayers all moaned. She smiled. "With his axe. The HYDRA idiots attacked a nursery." They stared. She nodded. "Yeah. Including the two agents who just tried to take me out. So I called for some help." She waved a hand at Loki. "Because he once vowed to protect me."

"Huh?" one of the younger slayers asked.

"Senior Council only secret!" Willow yelled.

"What she said," Dawn admitted with a smile for that one, giving her a hug. "I'll disappear later. That way they can't find me here. There's ones who'd *love* to own me. Including a few aliens." She shrugged and looked at Kreth. "I will not bring problems to your door," she said simply.

"Thank you...Dawn." He stared at her. She shrugged. "I was once an artificer."

She smiled. "That's a neat thing. I seem to like healing. I don't do it real well yet but I seem to like it." Kreth shook his head as he walked off but he was smiling. "Okay, ladies, let's settle in and take stock of what we need that I can go nag people into."

"We really don't need the help, Dawn," Kennedy said. "You'd just bring more trouble here when they come looking for you. Because I do know."

Dawn smiled at her. "Let me shoot you then so I'm safer." Kennedy stepped back, looking scared. "Willow's in deep for telling you."

"I read Tara's journal."

Willow stomped out to scream at her for that. Loki followed, blocking the magic from coming out to smite the county they were in. He looked at Kreth, nodding slightly. "I did make such a vow to one who taught me."

Kreth nodded. "I realize why. We need Thor to come here. His girlfriend is having panicking moments thanks to the matter that possessed her once."

Loki went to look at that infection for him. It calmed back down when Dawn came over and flowed out of Jane and into her. "Oh, great, I need more," she said. "Sure, hi, Aether." She waved at her stomach. "Just don't do the cheesy thing and make me pregnant." She looked at Jane. "So, where is your tall, buff, and blond thing?"

"London. Protecting the artifact vault."

"Cool. That's my future job I think." She grinned. "Be there soon." She walked off. "Let me go talk to Thor. Loki, can you help Willow or would you like to travel with me?"

"I think I'll travel to protect you as I vowed. She's a future problem."

Dawn nodded, looking at Willow. "Some day you'll be seen like his brother sees him. Xander kinda does." Willow glared. She stared back. "Really."

"Whatever. Go." She waved a hand and they were in London.

"Handy," Dawn said with a hum. "Loki, you should probably draw less attention since it's not All Saints and no one else is in costume." He let it fade to a suit and tie look. "Thanks." She frowned. "Artifacts?" she muttered, tapping a finger against her chin. "That way." She walked off, going to the Tube. He followed, taking care of the few pickpockets that tried her. They made it to the bank that held the vault and it was late but she held up her Council ID to the guard, who let her in. She waved the ID card, nodding at Giles when they ran into him. "He's protecting me. Perry showed up in DC."

"Oh, dear Janus," Giles complained.

Dawn grinned. "It was a wacky Xander plan but he got to talk to Willow too. Thor's girlfriend wants him back. Can we switch places?"

"Yes. You'd be wonderful handling this area, Dawn. We did teach you to handle artifacts."

"And there's a few potions books I really wanted into. Plus, hey, the aliens that tried to talk me into going with him won't be here."

"Alien?" Giles demanded, putting his glasses onto the desk hard enough to bend them. "What aliens, Dawn!"

She shrugged. "He was blue! That's all I know." She waved a hand. "He had bad teeth, he was blue, and he had a tiny ship that he parked in the Potomac. He said I was important to some weapon thing and he wanted to let me see it first." She stared at him. "I tried to call but got Buffy. You know what she'd do if I had told her. I started to tell Xander and then the HYDRA imbeciles attacked a nursery to draw Xander and others out. Which, they did get Xander. He's talking to Perry." She grinned. Giles stared, mouth open. "No clue beyond that."

"Blue aliens bring it down to three species," Loki said casually. Dawn stared at him with a smile. "One's neutral against humans, the other is a conquering race, the third mostly dead the last time I heard."

"Huh. Cool. Any idea which one it was from the bad teeth?"

"That's probably a personal issue," he said. "Not a species trait." Giles stared at him. He changed back with a smirk. "I once made a vow to guard her essence."

"That figures," Giles said dryly. "Your brother's downstairs."

"Let me go get him. You two figure the thing out." She walked off. The two watchers in the way just stared at her. "Move, guys. Don't make me prove Xander put me into defense classes against Buffy's will." They sneered. She knocked them both out then walked over their bodies. When she got to the vault, Thor was in full battle mode. "Chill, Shiny." He stared at her. "I'm Dawn, Buffy's sister. Your girlfriend is freaking out because the Aether showed it had tainted her."

Thor blinked at her. "What are you?" he demanded.

"Buffy's sister." She smiled. "Presently." She stepped forward. "So, Jane? Panicking?" He sighed and called her. She looked at the artifacts and sighed, going to unstack a few things. "Whoever put these two together are idiots," she yelled. "They're ancient enemies! Do we want them to leak and destroy the city!"

Giles walked in and sighed. "Oh, dear. The old ones are thankfully gone." He came in to help her. "I have no idea who did this."

"I'm just hoping they're dead," Dawn said. "Sorry to be so crude if you knew them, but we don't need this sort causing more problems that Xander will have to solve."

Xander appeared with Perry the demon, who was injured, but the demon left after a scowl from Thor. "You rang?" he asked, holding his arm.

"Injured, Xander?" Giles asked, moving to help her with him.

"Axe?" she asked. He lifted the handle. "The head?" It was on his back. "That'll work. We can fix it." She hugged him. "Let me do a healing potion." She found a potion book and went to create it in the workshop area they had always set up for emergencies. One thing was missing but she sighed and sent a message to Willow, who sent it at her. She brought it out to Xander, handing it to him. "By the way, Giles, I get to take out Kennedy. She read Tara's journal and *knows*."

"Knows what?" he asked. She gave him a pointed look. He stared. "She *knows*?"

"Tara's journal." She smiled. "I had Loki talking to Willow too. She's like a scary version of him for us."

"My brother?" Thor demanded, staring at her. "Who are you?"

"Buffy's sister Dawn." She looked at him. "At one point in time Loki vowed on his virgin blood to protect me, Thor."

"Why would he do such?"

Loki strolled in, pausing to hiss in his ear. "You missed that lesson from Mother, Brother." He looked at her. "There's those sort here too. They may be coming."

"Tracking me or her?" Xander asked. He smiled at Loki's staring. "What?"

"You're...here?" he asked with a hand wave. "With your blood?"

Xander nodded. "They told me about that last year. I promised to help Buffy after they took my potential soulmate." Loki moaned. "I haven't finished this war against them yet."

Loki nodded. "Charming of you. A bit bad though."

"The ones who told me about it said that. I told them this is a higher calling and I'd go ask to be a living avatar first." Loki shuddered. "I've been to a few temples where I could apply." He grinned at Dawn. "One would love you."

"I'm already a goddess to some, Xander. Why do I want to lower myself to be the avatar of another?"

"Point. That's why I haven't yet. I'm keeping it for a last ditch effort."

"You two both need to rest because we'd have to take you out for that," Giles warned.

Xander grinned, hugging him. "Janus offered too." He walked off to move a few artifacts. "I had these sent up so they could be separated, guys. They were trying to destroy parts of sub-Saharan Africa." The other watchers huffed but came to help him move the statues.

Thor looked at his brother. "What is your part in this?"

"I vowed my protection on the young chit," he said with a point. He rolled his eyes. "I'm not sure if that was a wise decision or not yet."

She smiled at him. "It was very wise. Just think of what chaos I'm preventing right now."

Xander winced and held his head. "Including one that's finding Thor's hidden way home and going to go visiting." He sighed. "Who's the warrior guarding the slayers?"

"Kreth," Giles said.

Thor stiffened. "I know of him. He went on a quest of grief."

"His granddaughter is one of the young slayers," Xander said, straightening up. He stared at him. "He could use the backup. They're going to attack there with some cosmic something or other that looks like a raygun but fires from a stone."

"That's interesting," Loki said. "Another cosmic cube."

Thor looked at him then at Dawn then back at him. "The binder?"

"No, I'm the originating source," she said dryly, smiling at him. "But thanks for asking."

Thor stared, mouth open. Loki groaned, shaking his head. "I did not realize that," Loki admitted, looking at Thor. "That means more protecting."

"No, I'm pretty good at it," Dawn said with a smile. "And only us here know." She looked at the two staring watchers. "You will not mention this or your life is forfeit. I'll have Willow sacrifice you."

Xander shook his head. "I can do that. Not a problem. I know a few who'd *adore* them." They shook their heads quickly. Xander grinned. "So we're all protecting Dawn, right?" They nodded quickly. "Good! And don't tell Willow either! She'll have a fit. Her and Buffy both."

"No, it's our secret to our grave," one said.

"If you wish to be an avatar, have you seen the temple to Athena?" the other asked.

"She hates me. I'm a guy," Xander said dryly. "She's supposedly over the slayers. I asked one of her priestesses for help. Snotty whore syndrome did commence. She even expected me to pay her for it."

"Oh," that watcher said, nodding. "That figures."

Xander nodded. "I get along better with the Amazons I met." He grinned. "They were really nice and really helpful for that one battle. They didn't even mind that I'm infertile."

Giles stared at him. "I heard nothing about amazons, Xander," he said impatiently.

Xander smiled. "Hell no you didn't. Because I wasn't going to listen to the bitching I'd get from Willow when she answered the emails for you." He looked at his healing injuries then up. "I'm getting that 'come save us' feeling. Anyone else?" Dawn nodded with a grimace. "Okay." He looked at his axe. Then around, picking up a newer generation axe that had a tag stating it was imbued with evil. "That'll work. Evil can fight evil this time." He looked at Loki. "Dawn. Stays. With. You."

"I have agreed to my protection, boy."

"Good," Xander quipped. "Giles?"

"Go. Handle it. It does seem to be your thing as you young ones say."

"Cool. Liberate me some of the weapons?" The calling was getting stronger. The watchers gave him a lot of weapons and they sent him to Willow, who shrieked because she was on a stake. Again. "Wow, redo to Hansel and Gretel demons." He smiled at the staring people. "No, not today. We need her. Sorry." They tried to attack him. "Fuck you too." He picked up things and fired back. Then he dove in with the local demons who had come to help the girls. "People, free the girls," he ordered. "That is your only concern! Free all the slayers and get them to safety."

"Yes, Knight," a few called.

One looked. "Can we eat the annoying ones?"

"No," Xander called, using his axe on one of the humans. "You can't eat Kennedy yet."

"Fine."

Xander shook his head. "I have to work with Kennedy sometimes. Even though she's a royal cunt."

"Watch your language around the minis, Xander!" Willow yelled from her pole. She was trying to get free.

Thor landed and waded into the fray, taking out the humans. Loki and Dawn showed up. Dawn went to free the minis she could. Loki looked at Willow. "You look good up there." He smiled and freed the others.

Willow's growl was real loud and he watched as her hair bleached and her skin grew black veins. "Oh, so that's why they compared us." He tried to knock her out. No go. "Well that's interesting."

Xander glared at him. "Willow, no smiting Loki. He's protecting Dawn. Use it on the other bad guys!" He glared at Loki. "My parents were worse than yours and I still managed not to become a serial killer. Can't you pretend for a day or so?" He got back to the battle, ignoring the glaring going on. He cut another one then backswung to behead that guy. He spun to get the guy that had just shot at him, throwing the axe at him. Into the shoulder. Xander pulled his usual sword to use instead.

"That's why Xander's our version of a crazy knight," one of the young slayers said to one of the Asgard warriors. "He brings a sword or an axe to a battle that needs real weapons." She picked up a gun.

"Don't you dare!" Dawn yelled. "They're humans, even if they don't act like it!"

Kreth took the gun from his granddaughter's hand. "You're not old enough yet. Go inside with the others. Take them to the hidden room." She nodded, getting all the free ones in there. The older girls shoved her inside and guarded the doorway so any others that got free could get in there.

Xander got the last group free and pointed. "Inside. Let the men talk, ladies. You can't hurt humans," he reminded one. "Go inside, Yihana."

"Yes, Xander." She led the girls in there.

Xander looked. "Dawn." He pointed. "Greet them if they're not on our side." She looked at the landing helicopters and nodded, running that way. "My brothers, we should not have to fight this battle," he said simply. "But we will and we will win against those that would take out those who protect everyone from the bad things that kill us all." The demons roared and moved in.

Buffy stared, blinking a few times. "Wow."

Faith nodded. "Yup." They got the last few slayers inside and went in to hide. This wasn't their fight. Buffy tried to get to Dawn but Faith hauled her off. "She's safe, B. Let her be. Those ones aren't joining."

Buffy nodded, taking a deep breath. "I can't lose more people. I really can't," she said. "I'd rather die first."

"Not tonight," one of the minis told her. "This one isn't our fight because they're people." She stared up at her. "We don't fight people. We fight demons."

"I know." She hugged her. "I'm just really worried about Dawn."

"Me too," Willow sighed from her corner. "They shoved me in here."

Buffy looked at her. "They might take you out, Willow. We've got to figure out how to help Xander."

"He can handle it."

"No, he can't. He can't take out all those people!" Buffy shouted back. "No matter how often he's had to do it before!" she said when one of the African slayers opened her mouth. "I don't like he had to do it there!"

"Quit shouting," Willow said quietly. "It's not helping, Buffy, and I need to calm down. So do you." She stared at her. "Before we cause a mess that we don't want to." She hugged her. "It'll be okay. Xander has help. He has weapons. He's Xander. He does wacky things. It's Xander."

Buffy took a deep breath, then nodded. "He is and if he's arrested for protecting us we'll handle it." The building shook and a few of the minis screamed. "It's reinforced, it won't come down on us, ladies." She moved to soothe the scared young ones. This was their first real, bad thing. Of course they were scared.

***

Outside, Xander stared at the being that had fired on the house. "You hurt my minis and I'm going to destroy your ass."

"Sorry! Got turned around!" He turned to fire on the humans.

Dawn looked at the first person out. "Oh, great, just what we need, a mind fucking bastard who set up Xander to die. And probably me too!" She glared at him and moved around him. "If you're here to help, go help Xander." She hit one. "I know damn well you're dirty. You tried to take me hostage to sacrifice." She walked over him. "Fall in, help the Xander. The rest of everyone is safely hidden again." They ran to help.

"Oh, good, weapons." She smiled and took them with her. "That'll make a pretty mess." She fired them off on the bad guys and one demon that was trying to get into the house. "Away from the slayers, dumbass! You're here for the bad humans, not to hurt a baby slayer!" She went back to firing on the bad guys. One of the agents stared at her. She smiled. "I'm Buffy's sister and they tried to take me out in DC. They're very lucky Perry decided to come play." He shuddered. That demon had made a mess during the battle against it.

"Then again, they're the sort that take out baby demons just to get attention. Pity." She fired off something else, freeing Thor of the ones that were trying to kill him. "Leave the hair and cape alone, people! His girlfriend's mean and she'll open portals to get the rest of Asgard down here! Do you really want to see that?" she yelled. Loki smirked at her and nodded. "Don't tempt me." He shuddered. They paused when a small ship came down to land. "Oh, fuck me," she muttered, running for Loki. "Blue alien guy!" She waved a hand and got Thor free of someone by kicking him. "Alien guy?" she asked with a point.

He looked then at her. "Kree."

Loki shook his head. "Not a good thing." He went to talk to them about Dawn and leaving her alone. It was a small battle but oh well. He was better. Dawn could protect herself. She wasn't the princessly sort at all it seemed. Then he heard her scream and winced, looking back. No, someone had cut her hair with a bullet. "Oh my," he sighed, going to stop her from breaking out in magic and exposing herself. "Dawn, perhaps you should go hide yourself?" he yelled. "Now please!"

She took a sword off one of the warriors and stabbed the guy. "Don't touch the hair! Do you know how long it takes to grow this shit out! I *am* a Summers woman and we *are* concerned about stuff like that." She stabbed him again, killing him this time. "Jackass!" She spit on him and moved on to get another few for that sin.

Thor looked at the alien. "Flee before they get you as well," he called in All Speak. "Because these sort would take you for a specimen." He flew off. Thor shook his head but watching Loki try to make Dawn quit stabbing people was fun to watch.

Xander yelped. "Oh, fuck you back!" he said, blowing the guy's head off. "I did not need that reopened! Thank you!"

"Xander!" Dawn called. "Need me?"

"Need you out of the way," he shot back. "Go sit down, Dawn. You're tired." He stared at his enemies. The agents were getting the ones on the outer ring, the rest were trying to get him down. He had two pieces of artillery left. He had two allied demons with him. This was going to get messy and he silently told himself he'd do what he could do until he died. Then he'd come back to avenge his death. It was enough. This time, it was just enough. Then the agents blew the bad guys up. Xander looked at the others then at the demons. "Huh." They nodded. "Thanks, guys. Go ahead and flee before they try you too." He patted one on the arm. "Thank you."

"The slayers are good for all who are peaceful. Even those of us in warrior groups." He whistled. "We are going before the humans want us as specimens." They left together.

Thor wiped his sweaty hair back, looking around. "This was a mess."

Xander nodded, looking at his weapons. "Yeah, it was." He spotted someone he hated and walked over to punch him. "Thanks for endangering my life even more. I really needed that gift. I'm going to have someone make you my eternal bodyguard for that." He limped off, going to get his injuries cleaned up in a bathroom. "Do we have running water, Kreth? Please? I'd like to clean some of these."

"We should. We have a well, boy." He stared at him. "Now I know why they call you a Knight."

Xander grinned a bloody smile. "I jumped in because a pretty girl shouldn't do it on her own. Then they took a friend."

The Asgardian warriors nodded. "That is what we would do as well," one agreed. "We will go clean our injuries and celebrate with mead. You can join us. You are more than worthy to join us."

"We have medics," Fury said, wiping off his split lip. "He hits like a girl."

Hill hit him and knocked him down. She had wanted to do that for years. She smirked. "Because you endangered all of us by taking out the early warning system." She walked off. "Let's get the medics here now. Someone tell the slayers the battle is done with."

"Don't let them out yet," Xander called. "We'd never survive the fussing." He sighed, shaking his head. "I'll need to run away again at the nagging too," he said more quietly.

One of the warriors clapped him on the back. "Even female warriors fuss at their warmates, boy."

Xander looked at him. "They think I'm normal."

The warriors all laughed. "They are girlish for warriors but that is good for their kind." They went to clean up and get showers then eat something and get a bit drunk. The slayers were kept away from the warriors since no one could put up with fussing tonight. The two minis who snuck in got cuddled by Xander then sent off to protect themselves from the agents.

Kreth sat down across from Xander. "What happened to the axe parts you carry?"

"His name's Perry and he's an ancient, powerful demon who tried to take down DC. A few of the HYDRA agents had bothered his temple. I had to help defend DC from his temper tantrum. I'll find someone to fix it this week. She's my baby at times."

"We all have weapons we honor and favor," Kreth said. "A few of us are blacksmith trained."

"Can they teach me how to fix it?"

"We can. It will help work off the hangover."

Xander grinned. "This doesn't compare to Gromagrn. It's a demon liquor and about two fingers worth is enough to give alcohol poisoning to a whole group." Kreth smiled at that. "My ex Anya showed me that. I used it against a war band once. It took a bottle that was only about thirty bucks but they all nearly died from alcohol poisoning." He grinned and took a sip. "Anya talked up mead from her old days as a human the first time."

"I know not of her story."

"You might know her by her name Anyanka better," Xander said. "I had to walk away from her at the altar, it would've made her miserable to be tied as a human forever." He took another drink. "Even though the others lied a lot about us having kids and me being out of shape for battles." Kreth stared, mouth open. Xander grinned. "She was kinda like the kitty cat that you feed once and they keep coming back. She demanded I take her to the prom. Then we slept together. Then she kept coming back and I nearly married her." A few of the warriors moaned and shook their heads. "But she would've been miserable and I couldn't do that to her. It would've been evil of me and I'm only evil when I've had too much chocolate."

Kreth smiled. "You need to rest, young one."

Xander nodded as he sipped some more mead. "I know but if I go where the minis can find me they'll nag. I hate nagging."

"Go curl up in the pantry then." He pointed at the door. "They can't find you in there." Xander grinned at him and took his refilled mug that way. Kreth looked at his fellow warriors. "Well, now we know what happened there."

"She died at the battle of the First Evil," Willow said from behind him. "She volunteered to go in with the slayers and Xander. She died friends with him again and agreed, her being married to him would've made her miserable." She sat down next to him. "I'm avoiding the agents before I turn them all into kittens or something for the girls to pet to calm down." She picked up a piece of cheese to nibble on. "Does anyone need a healing spell or something? I'm not great at them but I can help."

Kreth patted her on the back. "Not tonight, Willow. Thank you though." She smiled and shrugged. "Go avoid your argument with your girlfriend by asking Loki how he intends to guard Dawn from the Kree. They are stubborn." She nodded, going to do that.

"Mayhap they'll work on each other's bad sides," another warrior quipped. "I saw Loki's temper coming up earlier."

"Willow could use the guideposts," another agreed. "I've seen her trying to stay on the light but her magic calls to her strongly. The whole Council loathes that but we can't do much about her." They all nodded. "Thankfully I don't have to deal with Xander too often. He drives us barmy."

"Most of us are glad he gave Heimdall knowledge of his vision of the convergence," Thor said. "Or else we would have lost my mother to that battle at the palace." The warriors stared at him so he told them how it had happened. A few groaned. "Those of us who wish to come home, I have a doorway set up in case I am needed while I am down here with my Lady Jane."

"Your lady is very interesting, Thor. Very strong of mind. Her assistant is charming as well and many of us would like to court her if she would but give us attention instead of lip and smiles."

Thor grinned. "Darcy is my claimed sister as she used her box on me twice when Odin banished me. Her lightening box is very handy."

Kreth smiled and nodded. "We've seen. One of the younger warriors got mouthy. He ended up flopping on the ground groaning like he was in pain." He sipped his own mead. "Both women are strong and the sort the slayers could look up to."

"Have they?" Thor asked.

"The young ones. The older ones, some are spoiled but some are good enough to know when women are strong enough. One..." He looked toward the doorway, where they were all ignoring the magic growing. "I believe they're going to have another argument about one's magic and the other's problems." Xander growled as he stomped past them. "Hmm, he does have a temper. We had wondered. The younger slayers thought him pleasant and normal."

Thor nodded. "That must not please him."

"Probably not," another older warrior agreed. "Thor, did you save your mother?"

"Aye, she was injured but well when I left. She agreed I should come." He finished his mead. "I will send to her that you asked of her."

"Thank thee."

"Do you mind!" Xander shouted somewhere in the large manor house. "Some of us are trying to sleep off the damn battle! We do not want to know about magical girlfriend abuse, even if Kennedy is the only one I find worthy to have it done to her! Both of you need to grow the fuck up and split the fuck up so *someone* in this universe is happy before I smite me a bitchy slayer and then spank me a witch who *should* know better! Thank you kindly for your cooperation!" He stomped off again, going back to the pantry to sleep.

Buffy smiled and leaned in. "We'll make Willow and Kennedy go fight somewhere else. Sorry they're making a bad impression and Xander yelled that way. He hasn't really been sleeping while we guarded the main house in Cleveland, even with the agents there helping us." She walked off. "Willow, why don't you two go to Giles' house or somewhere in London to have that talk?" she called as she walked. "That way everyone gets some sleep to nap off the battle stress." She saw Nick Fury in the hallway and turned, then turned back and walked over, having to reach up pretty far to punch him in the jaw. This time, he went flying. He could take a full on slayer punch. "And that's for endangering Xander. We need Xander. The girls sure as hell don't listen to Giles." She walked off again. Yihana had knocked out both of the warring couple. "Thanks, Yihana. Did you call your watcher?"

"He was moaning in pain, but mostly from the hangover." She looked at her. "This is not what we expected being a slayer to be."

"Yeah, I warped it pretty hard so we're allowed to be girls instead of warriors. It's kinda nice. I can't imagine only having one outfit like Kendra had when she was woken because I died for a few minutes."

"You died?" Yihana asked.

"Xander never told you?" She shook her head. "We can have story time about Sunnydale stuff." She gathered the younger girls together to tell them about Kendra and Sunnydale. It was a good bedtime story for the youngest slayers. It might even make them appreciate Willow and Xander more.

***

An agent from one of the British intelligence groups showed up the next morning at a truly unkind hour by the slayer clock. Thankfully the warriors were up. Kreth looked at the agent being let into his home. "Yes?" he asked, smiling some. It was nice they had waited for them to clean and calm down before showing up to nag them.

"Sir, we are aware there was a battle yesterday that we were not warned was coming. May we speak?" the agent asked.

"Of course. Should I get anyone else?"

"Is Mr. Harris here? We don't really like talking to most of the Council but we understand him and he doesn't try to blow smoke up our kilts the way some do."

"He's in a foul mood this morning. Willow awoke him from his sleeping the battle off."

"I've seen him in that sort of mood before."

"I'll have him brought." Kreth went to lean into the kitchen. "The agent would like to talk to Xander as well. He says Xander tells him the truth. He said he didn't even mind the hangover."

Xander leaned out of the pantry. "He's probably going to complain and I'm going to bite him. Can't Giles do it? He's the actual head of the Council."

"Bring him with you, boy. You apparently have status as they listen to you."

"That's because I don't try to muddle their minds like the rest of them." He stood up with a groan, holding his sore arm. "The pantry was really comfy. Thank you for letting me borrow it until I can run away from the nagging again."

Kreth patted him on the back. "It's a good place to hide but my granddaughter usually uses it to hide from chores."

Xander grinned. "I'd do the same thing." They walked into the sitting room. "Hey, Keith."

"Xander." He shook his hand and sat back down when they did. "What on earth happened?"

"We, the Council, was in the way of HYDRA. We were a pretty strong wall and they were going to kidnap the girls to brainwash into their army."

Keith the agent blinked at him. "So you had to have a battle?"

"They attacked the house a few times. Actually, the vision was much worse. It would've just been a slow crumbling of SHIELD as their infestation ate them from the inside until the Captain guy found out." Keith winced. "I saw three whole agencies in rubble." He grinned. "I warned them. They thanked me for it by using me as bait by outing me as a seer. Then we got a bomb, and we got threats, and we got a problem...." He smiled. "Then we had a battle because they started it."

Kreth nodded. "We were asked by a slayer to help guard the girls. I did not know it was that bad until the warning came out for the young ones to go into hiding. Then I had to ask."

"One of us went to ask Thor but we only knew about the ones that were banished," Buffy said as she came in.

"The list I gave her had a few others," Xander said. "I was hoping they'd be able to maybe go home and quit giving so many problems in the Mediterranean." Xander rubbed his forehead. "Because there's six down there causing no end of issues by outing themselves and getting attacked and then getting drunk and into brawls and taking on the local peaceful demons that've been there for centuries. They're the ones keeping the sea down there calmer and full of fish and they tried to take them out. I'm not sure if they're all going to live through their last injuries."

Keith nodded. "It would be nice if they could go home then. Plus them guarding the girls would give their lives something to do again."

"A warrior without a mission is bored," Kreth said. "They often drink and get into trouble. I'll have Thor talk to them."

"The slayer that talked to him said it'd look bad if he did but he did eventually," Buffy said. "No idea how that worked out if they're not here."

"Nope," Xander said. "Only one."

Kreth smiled. "I know of that one. Discipline solved much of that. I'll talk with Thor later about some of them." Xander grinned at him. "At least you had her try."

"I figured it was his people and we needed more warriors, and some might even want to help the slayers once they realized they're tiny young women who like to shop but end up in battles." He shrugged. "I'm always looking for someone to date some of the girls who aren't dirtbags."

Kreth burst out laughing. "I know of many warriors who would like to date a female warrior because it would mean she could protect their family and their home if something happened." He smiled. "You have many ideas, young one."

"I try."

"Too hard sometimes." Buffy looked at him. "You get to talk to Andrew about his nanites."

Xander looked at her. "If I did that, I'd have an eternal bodyguard." She huffed. He grinned at Keith again. "I heard it helped when they started to confess."

"I hadn't heard a thing about that and as far as I'm concerned I haven't yet. Until my supervisor asks." The two from the Council smiled at him for that. "Then I'll talk to Andrew about that. Where is he?"

"Hiding in his evil guy condo lair," Xander said. "Somewhere on a beach with skanky college girls."

"Ah. Well, he could probably use a few of those anyway. Might help him calm down and make better concrete plans for when he tries to take over humanity. I know he'll try some year."

"I'd better be gone," Buffy said dryly. "I lived through Warren shooting me and killing Tara. I lived through Jonathan's book thing. I don't need another evil genius incident in my life."

"He promised me a few skanky hos of my own if I didn't try to stop him," Xander quipped with a grin.

Thor walked in pulling back his hair. "Thank you for hosting us, Kreth."

"It's no problem, my Prince." He smiled. "Did you talk to the ones by the Mediterranean?"

"I had. They are bored and causing problems."

"Yes they are and it's going to mean that sea goes nasty and fishless," Xander quipped. "I'm tired of yelling at them if you wanted to take up that job too." He grinned. Thor stared at him oddly. "We do protect the peaceful communities and that one keeps the seas calm and the fish plentiful so people don't starve. I'd let some of the older girls pounce them but they haven't been the sort I'd trust around them yet."

"They're young, bored, and stupid. They'll learn," Kreth assured him. He looked at Thor. "This is an agent from the local government."

Thor shook his hand. "I have seen Director Fury."

"I'm ignoring he exists as well because he does not have authority to act over here." Keith smiled. "Which is another tizzy that the higher ups had about the battle." He looked at Xander. "Could have warned us."

"I didn't know it was going to happen at all, much less here. I was in London when it started."

"So the weapons you used were mostly the Council's?"

"I think SHIELD brought some but I think Dawn used those," Xander said.

Buffy blinked. "My sister Dawn?" she demanded. "Dawn!"

"Fuck. Off! I'm doing something!" was yelled back by a female. "I can't leave this potion and it's a healing one!"

"How did my brother come into this?" Thor asked, sitting down.

"I wasn't going to mention him either," Keith said with a smile for Xander. "You seem to give the best explanations so do you have one for him?"

"We were in DC and the dirty agents were trying to attack Dawn. Apparently he had vowed to protect her at one point in time so she called in the debt." Keith sighed, shaking his head. "It's helpful. He's talked to Willow too." He grinned at Thor. "Thank you."

"She is mucho loud with her fight against Kennedy," Buffy said. "Then again, Kennedy did neat things like not tell London they were going to have a battle." Keith looked at her. "One of the others told everyone when Xander reminded them."

"Good," Keith said. "Can we remove her from the local house?"

"This is our punishment house because you guys won't let them get away with anything," Xander said with a smile. "Not like we can send her out on patrol on her own."

"Point. Pity but a point. Maybe the house in Paris?"

"They're still swearing we're deluded and they're going to fix us yet," Buffy sighed. "We just snort and ask for more pastries apparently."

"It's going to suck when one of their top judges has to admit his daughter's a slayer," Xander said, sipping his coffee that had just appeared. "Thanks, Willow. She even remembered the sugar."

Buffy sipped her tea and the others sipped their own drinks. "I like it when Willow's fussing." She looked at Xander.

He held up his free hand. "You start nagging and I'm walking off again." He took another drink and relaxed.

"Not going to nag. Just quietly complain that you got hurt again."

He stared at her. "Yeah. Lots and lots of people with weapons against me, a good group of warrior demons, the Asgardian warriors, and we mostly had more primitive weapons than guns. I'm lucky I'm not dead and so are they, Buffy. Though, I'll still come back as an avatar." He smiled.

"Don't tell me that. Or Willow. You know she'll try to make you immortal."

He nodded. "Yeah. She had to be diverted when she heard that before." He sipped his coffee again.

Keith shook his head. "You guys are certifiable."

"It's the battles," Xander said dryly. "And starting when we were teenagers." He grinned. "Not like most people have our sort of battles at sixteen."

Thor shrugged. "Our warriors start training about then but we don't have battles like the girls go through usually."

"If it could calm down...." Buffy said dryly. "I'd like not to have any more apocalypse battles too."

"I second that motion," Xander quipped. Giles walked in. "Agent Keith, this is Rupert Giles, head of the Council."

"Pleasure," Giles said, shaking his hand. He looked at Xander. "Willow's huffy?"

"That Loki told her to be less obviously evil, that Kennedy's a bitch, or is it post battle Xander's in our way feelings again?"

"Probably a bit of all of them, though I did agree with Loki about Willow." He settled between his two people. "Thank you, Lord Kreth, for guarding my slayers so well. We were hoping to draw them away from the girls, not have them appear here."

Kreth smiled. "I'm no Lord, Rupert, and it was my pleasure. One is my granddaughter and most of the girls are very good guests. They puttered in my garden for days." He sipped his tea. "The other few needed spanked or diverted from worrying and those who were old enough got to spar with the warriors." Xander grinned at that plan. "And a few pounced for stress relief."

"As long as they made sure the warriors agreed," Buffy said dryly. "And didn't hurt them."

"No, it was good for them," Kreth said.

"We'd like all the girls to have good boyfriends or girlfriends. If they do it for them, go for it and I'll walk anyone down the aisle if they want," Xander said. "As long as no one's going to come storming into my camp to kill me for being here."

Keith shook his head. "We don't want to. SHIELD ...that's another matter." He stared at him. "They're concerned you acted against them."

"They endangered my life on purpose like I'm their staked goat," Xander said simply. "I owe them a few more hits." Keith shuddered. Giles patted him on the leg to calm him down. Xander looked at him. "I'm probably not going to be safe for a good, long time."

"We'll work on it," Giles soothed.

"They went on network news and told them I'm the seer that had foreseen all that! That means I'm going to be hunted for being a seer, and by people who want to know what I've seen beyond that. Frankly, they can all go away for that."

Buffy looked around Giles at him. "You didn't get any at the house."

"We've had a few agents calling over for us to detain him until we can find out what he's seen," Keith said. "We have no idea which side of that battle they're on."

"I emailed all those to SHIELD," Xander said dryly.

"The US is about to declare them defunct and nearly terrorists. They won't trust them."

Maria Hill walked into the doorway, staring at him. "We can fix that, Xander."

He snorted. "Are you a goddess now, Hill?" He stared at her. "I'm pretty sure you can't. Especially since that would make me a huge target right before any apocalypse battle because now they know too." She winced but nodded. "Frankly, spill all you want to help me but when I get killed from this, Fury is on my list because of this incident."

She nodded. "Understood and we're working to get you free of the US government." She nodded at Agent Keith. "I do have copies of all of them."

"Your people's buildings were all confiscated last night," he said dryly.

"I know. It's in my personal emails. Which are conveniently with the BBC I'm told."

Xander grinned. "Instead of having her do that while you and Captain guy were taking down those helicarriers that were going to murder thousands, I suggested it happen earlier. Which helped a lot when agents started to pop up as dirty. Made your job easier in a way."

"It did," she agreed. "Thank you." She walked off again. She had to work on that problem before the rest of them died because someone was coming after Xander.

Buffy shook her head. "You're paranoid."

"Seers are always a target," Thor said. Kreth nodded. "Among ours, our seers are protected as our healers are. That way none can get to them to make them see for them or to take out the warning system." Xander grimaced but nodded. "Thank you for warning Heimdall."

"It's no problem, Thor. If you love your mom, you're going to want to save her. Plus it helped lessen the battle down here by a lot. You guys didn't destroy half the college like you would've before." Thor smiled. "We're still protecting your girlfriend in case others want to take her for her portal making ideas."

"Thank thee. That is good to know for when I cannot be close by."

Willow stomped in. "Buffy, I need to be moved somewhere else."

Xander cleared his throat. "Willow." She glared at him. He stared back. "Fine, I won't give you a solution." She huffed. "Go to a sperm bank. You need an heir. You need someone to fuss over. You need to calm down. The senior witches suggested it last year. Maybe it's a good time because we're between battles?"

"That won't calm me down! I'll turn into my mother!"

"No you won't," Buffy said. "And it'd give me someone to fuss over too." Willow gaped. Buffy nodded with a grin. "I could love a niece and Annabeth said that she got a lot calmer after having her little whining spawn that hates cuddles."

"Oh. I...."

"Which would probably keep Kennedy away from you," Xander said, finishing his coffee with a grin. "Because she's not the stepmommy sort."

"I...." She slumped. "Giles?"

"I think it'd be an excellent idea, Willow. Children do change your outlook on life and your priorities. It could also calm you down because you can't be the flittering, impetuous witch with a baby depending on you."

"I...." She smiled. "I might do that. Thank you." She hugged Xander. "Still in trouble for being injured and all that, Mister. You're still normal."

He snorted. "Go tell Hill that." She waved a hand and they all felt the magic go. "Willow."

"That way she can't hurt you more."

"They told the news, Willow. Hill might actually be able to stop some of them."

"Ehh." She ended the spell. "Fine." She walked off to talk to one of the senior witches about that before she started to research. It wasn't like she had vowed her virginity to a god or anything. And hey, maybe they'd know a nice guy she could ask for his sperm.

Xander nodded at Giles. "Welcome," he mouthed. "Though I have no idea who she's going to pounce."

"She'll go to a bank, Xander. She likes girls," Buffy sighed in complaint.

"She liked Oz too and they had plenty of sex, Buffy."

"I forgot about Oz." She considered it then shrugged. "As long as she doesn't go jump Loki. And can we get him away from my sister?"

"He vowed his protection on her," Thor said. "He won't misbehave with her."

"I'm not worried about that. I'm worried he'll let her date or something. My sister needs to not date, not get any sort of attention from boys."

"That's not how life goes, Buffy," Kreth said. "She is a good young woman and a healer in training. Healers are *never* single." She pouted. "Your mother would appreciate her finding someone good."

"Not really."

Xander snorted. "Joyce would've yelled at you for that."

"Maybe but I'm still right." She went to nag her sister, but Dawn and Loki had disappeared when she had finished the healing potion. Buffy got to go help talk Willow into giving her someone else to fuss over and overprotect. She had done a great job with Dawn.

***

Dawn appeared in a small house. "This is not where I wanted to be," she said, looking at Loki. It was his portal.

"We were summoned," Loki said with a grimace for the man walking their way. "You called?"

"Slightly." He grinned at Dawn. "Is Xander alive?"

She stared at him. "Unlike Willow and my sister, I saw that." He smirked. "And yeah, he's about to run away from the fussing. Though it's nice the warriors from Asgard appreciate him." She smiled. "But why did you summon?"

"To talk about him."

"I'm about to help him put on hiding spells. You really have to talk to Xander, not us. He thinks of me like a goofy little sister, which I am, but he'll never take advice from me on love stuff or job stuff. They made their own war by taking his sworn brother." She shrugged. "Have a happier day, dude. I've got to get back to classes soon." She looked at Loki. "Back where we started? Or the clinic near there?"

"The clinic perhaps." He concentrated and brought them there. Someone in there jumped up with a weapon.

"Whoa!" Dawn said, freezing them. "He's protecting me from the bad guys. He's not here for you or to start trouble." She felt someone coming up behind her and froze him too, staring at him. "Stand down, Sparky." She looked at the nurse, smiling. "Can I help? I'm full of energy again."

"Yes. Gladly." She led them back to one of the treatment rooms so the doctor could suck off some of Dawn's energy while Dawn read healing textbooks. The two 'heros' got unfrozen as Dawn's energy got drained. The nurse kept them from getting to them. "Do not go near Dawn. If she's panicking she can do bad things that she doesn't mean to. We're all lucky she does healing things with her extra energy."

"Gifts are a choice," Dawn said from her seat. "I choose to use mine to help my sister and others." She looked at the one staring in there. "He vowed his protection on me. He's not here for you."

"He had New York invaded. It killed hundreds of people."

Dawn stood up and walked over. "The last one who tried to use my energy destroyed a realm." He flinched back. "Therefore, I called on his protection vow to help me when I needed it most. He's not here for you this time. Or his brother. Who is presently surrounded by young slayers. Okay?" He nodded stiffly, backing up. "Cool." She relaxed again. "All I wanted to do was to donate some excess energy to the healers, who always need it, then go do my homework for freshman classes next week. Frankly, I'm glad we could help you find your buddy there. I'm glad he's healing and all that.

"Thank you for protecting DC while we were scattered and handling the problems. And your buddies for handling Cleveland for us. But right now, we had a huge battle last night that nearly killed all of us. We're all a bit tense. As I don't have great methods of dealing with battle tension because I'm single right now, I need to finish this donation and if I'm not calm the healers can't use it. Since they need it to help people...." She waved a hand. "He also did really good talking to Willow about her magic addiction issues. Including magical girlfriend abuse I hope."

"I did point out it wasn't very nice of her," Loki admitted dryly. "But then again I believe the quim needed to have her head rearranged."

Dawn nodded. "We all think that about Kennedy." She went back to her seat. "Is your buddy okay or is there something I can make or do to help him heal more? I'm taking training from the healers after hours."

"The one healer got some of his memories unlocked and we're working on the rest of them," Steve said. "Thank you for helping him."

Dawn smiled. "It's never a problem. We like to help things. My mother would be proud I had helped. Complain a lot about the battle stuff but proud I had helped."

"I'm sure she would. You and your sister are both nice young women who handle a lot of things," Steve said. "Is she...."

"Died of a brain tumor that came up really suddenly. That was before the hell goddess that my sister died to stop." Steve nodded, looking down. "It's been a while but I'm pretty sure Mom would be happy." She smiled. "Let me know if you guys need stuff. I'm at one of the local colleges."

"I can do that. Thank you, Dawn."

"You're welcome. Oh, and don't bother Xander. He's a bit of panicking heavily right now thanks to Fury outing him as a seer."

Loki nodded. "Because that just put a major price on his head and they may not care if he's around a slayer."

"Some people would consider that a value-added moment," Dawn said. "Especially some demons with ideas of apocalypse battles."

Loki nodded. "True. Though I do have to admire his touch of craziness."

"They do call him a white knight," she shot back with a smile.

"Clearly so." The healer walked around Steve and came in to suck more energy. "How much can you donate?" he asked Dawn.

"A lot. Since I don't use my magic, it's gotta go somewhere."

"That's a good point. You know, a warrior spouse would be an ideal for you." Loki smiled.

"Yeah but most of them suck in bed," Dawn quipped back. "I'd never go for muscled, stupid, and bad in bed. I demand smarts, good in bed, and might like to travel with me while I study artifacts and healing."

Loki stared at her. "Thor's taken or I'd suggest him," he said finally, smirking at her.

"He'd be cute to climb but no, Jane has that in her hip pocket. And I doubt he'd like to talk about artifacts and healing with me."

"They're not really his areas, but he is smarter than he seems. You can't be stupid and rule."

She nodded. "Good point. Well, find me one that's cute, but maybe darker hair, and smart in my areas, and really good in bed, and I'll see." She smirked. "Without magic because I don't want mine to react to theirs. And no, not hinting."

"Good. You're not my type. Much too young and mortal." She smirked. "You are."

"I'd hope so. That would suck otherwise."

"Good point." He looked at the hero his brother had worked with to stop him. "How is the annoying one?"

"Handling the protection in Cleveland and other places."

Dawn snapped and pulled out her phone to call. "Hey, Petey, it's Dawn. Everyone's okay. Two of the minis were taken out before they got to safety, a few of the girls had some injuries from the capturing before Xander got there. Xander's fine, and talked Willow into thinking about having a baby to help her calm down and get away from Kennedy. The UK government guys are there to mildly complain that they weren't warned and to snub SHIELD. SHIELD is there to piss everyone off. So just settle Cleveland down because Buffy's on her way back as soon as she can. She's flirting hard with warriors that they'd like to let the girls adopt."

She listened. "That's sweet of them. Are they okay?" She nodded. "Yeah, that whole clan has been a bitch from what Buffy said about patrols recently. I'd tell Xander but he's paranoid about all that stuff so it'll be days. I'll tell Buffy that they ran into that clan. Thanks, Petey." She hung up and texted her sister. "That'll help and your teammates are fine, but a bit banged up after running into a massive clan of vampires that wanted to take over the city with their biker gang."

"I'll call them later. Which ones are there?" Steve asked.

"The pretty redheaded one and the one that most of the slayers drooled on the spandex butt of." She smiled. "And one other that's in punishment for not telling them something."

"I'll call Clint and Natasha. Thank you for your help, Dawn."

"Welcome." They walked off to call in Bucky's room and to protect Bucky from Loki.

Dawn shrugged at the healer, clearing her mind and emotions so more could be drained. It had to be neutral to be used for healing.

***

Loki reappeared on Asgard, shaking his head at the warriors converging on him. "I was summoned," he said. "I also bring news." He nodded. "Take me to Odin. It's not all good news but it is from his *son*." He walked that way and they surrounded him like an honor guard. How quaint. He walked in and nodded at his mother. She smiled and came down to hug him. "I was summoned by a protection vow I once made," he said in her ear.

She moaned. "Then we heard truly that the artifact was human." She sat down.

"We did." He looked at Odin. "Keep the cube off Earth." He handed over the letter to his guard of Sif. "From Thor's hand about the battle just fought and the warriors who helped." He looked at his mother. "She summoned me to protect her. She's studying artifacts and healing."

His mother nodded. "That's a good field for her gifts I would suppose."

"We saw a Kree. One showed up during the battle that was fought. She's a little hellcat but fashionable and only fights as a last resort."

His mother smiled. "Some girls are girlish that way. Was she pleasant while you protected her, my son?"

"Very. She let me do and wander as I wished as long as I was there to remove her from danger and get to her in the battle." He looked over as Heimdall walked in. "Thor?"

"The same seer was complaining about things, but praised your actions in guarding that young woman."

"The senior slayer's sister. She invoked my protection."

"I saw," Heimdall said with a small smirk. He bowed at Odin. "He was snatched."

"As you told me." He folded up the letter. "These warriors?"

"Most at the battle were ones who went on a quest, usually in grief. There were a few who had been banished. A few others are causing problems. Senior Warrior Kreth has an idea how to handle them. He thinks much of his family down there."

Odin nodded, smiling some. "Kreth always was a good warrior and would do many good. If that is his wish, I will take a petition to bring back some of them that have proven they have become better."

Heimdall nodded. "Thank you, Odin. The ones who were down there after their quests may also return. Some however may be with the slayers." Freya smiled at that information. "The girls have thought many make good watchers and hunting partners. It solves many problems. That seer agreed it was a good idea and had tried to set a few of them up before. He's also escaped with a note of gratitude to Senior Warrior Kreth for his help and an apology for fleeing the girls that way if it looked bad. Thor's Lady Jane had been tainted by the Aether but the one Loki was guarding finished removing it."

Loki snapped. "I forgot about that." He grimaced. "The healers training her could help with that."

Heimdall nodded. "They could, though the seer saw that clinic being attacked and called it in so they're all evacuating." He grimaced. "That man needs a guardian of his own."

"He'd probably enjoy dating someone like Sif," Loki said with a smile for her. "His last true woman was Anyanka."

Sif blinked at him. "I can't compete against that. I've never been that angry at men."

Heimdall looked at her. "He is a good man but young. He jumped into the battles without training and kept going as he absorbed it."

She nodded. "I've still never been that angry at men or that evil toward them. Maybe one of the other warriors?"

"Maybe," Heimdall agreed. "He could use one to soothe him and calm him down from where he is now. Right now he is on that same point of he'll walk off soon." He looked at Odin. "The one who was protected by him sent her thanks for the lending as she put it. We had not seen her coming into being."

Freya smiled and nodded. "It is weird but there was only one way that could happen."

"Which meant her sister died and was brought back, which started off the First Evil, which got all the slayers called, and then that led to them being able to win when LA was invaded by a demon plane," Dawn said from behind them. "Sorry, got sent." She held up the scroll. "Jane Foster sent that about something she ran into." She handed it to Heimdall. "She was asking if I could find a way to get it sent up because she couldn't talk to the witches, they upset her science with their arrogance. Somehow that led to me being here."

Heimdall looked it over then handed it to Sif for Odin. "I will send you back, Dawn."

"Thank you." She smiled and nodded. "Thank you for making him crafty and polite enough to be able to guard me recently."

Odin sneered. "Who do you think you are, child?"

She smiled back. "I'm the Key, Odin." He flinched back, shaking his head. She nodded. "Yup, little old me. Please protect my baby energy better? I felt when it was down there. Really not happy making." She looked at Loki. "Or your scepter. Damn glad I wasn't in New York then or we'd have had a whole different battle." She walked off with Heimdall. "Thank you for getting me home."

"It's no problem, Dawn."

"It probably is but I've got to figure out why that did the wacky thing."

"The Aether."

"I'll work on absorbing it or whatever later." He nodded, opening the portal to send her home. She sighed, collapsing on her couch. "That'll be fun. Let's meditate," she told her hamster. It went back to his hamster wheel to play some more. She added treats and food, cleaned his litter, made herself a snack, then settled in to meditate.

***

Odin stared at his wife, who nodded. "She was."

"Which I vowed to protect when I was taught of it. Most of us did," Loki added. "Let me go back to my cell so I can rest. I've been surrounded by bouncy female warriors who worry about their clothes and nails for the last week." He got led back there and put inside so he could finally nap.

Odin walked off to contemplate that development. That may be a huge problem for his son. He sent a letter to Thor about that but Heimdall told him later he would not deliver it because it could endanger all on that planet. Plus Loki had already warned him.

***

Back on earth, Xander was back in Africa, looking at Yihana's watcher. "Okay, let's get you straightened out because you're worrying your slayer and that makes them get injured or fussy or nag. No one needs slayer nagging. Trust me." He walked him off to make him sober up in the stream. Xander did train watchers as well as slayers. This one needed some training.

Up in England, Kreth found the letter of thanks, smiling at it. "I understand why he left. Even my own granddaughter nags. It must come from the slayer spirit. Probably from Buffy." He went to get lunch. The Council people were slowly going home after being nagged by the local government and SHIELD was simply huffing off like they hadn't started this problem. It'd be interesting to watch but not on his lawn. He noticed the broken axe and took the pieces to one of the better metal smiths to look over. He nodded he could easily fix it and needed something to do.

Thor walked into dinner that night. "My father has said he will take petitions for those who were banished to come home or make arrangements for those who want to go back. We can talk to Heimdall whenever one of you want."

Jane walked around his back, heading for the kitchen with Darcy pushing her. "I nearly have it figured out. We'll be able to reconnect the bridge in probably another six months."

Thor smiled at her. "Thank you, Jane. Darcy, she'll eat."

"Yeah, tomorrow," she said dryly. "She just got given books on the bridge by the witches that wanted her out of their hair."

Thor nodded. "My mother practices but doesn't have the fussing nature they do." He followed his lady and claimed sister to make sure Jane ate. She would do so when he reminded her. Or fed her by hand. It pleased her and made his night happier when she'd pounce later. Which left Darcy to go have her own pleasures with someone.

The warriors drew her to a table to talk with her. Warriors did like pretty young women.

***

Xander looked up from training one of the really minis as a truck pulled into the farm's driveway. "That's interesting." He looked at her mother and shrugged. "I'm hoping it's not a problem." He got up and walked out there to talk to them. The father of the family could but he was off working in a field so Xander was honor bound to protect the family. Not that he wouldn't have done it anyway. He paused by the front of the truck, staring at them. "Are you guys lost?" he asked in Swahili, then again in English when two white guys got out.

"No, Mr. Harris, we needed to talk to you about what happened in England," one of them said in a British accent.

"I already talked to Agent Keith. He liaisons with the Council."

"We know. We wanted to know a few more things and he's on injury leave," one said.

Xander stared at him. "I know damn well the rot was in your people too," he said bluntly. "Why should I trust you're not one of them?"

"Are you always this paranoid?" the other agent asked.

"Yes. Because there's people who could be out to get me," he shot back, staring at him then the other one. "I'm busy training one of the really minis. Frankly, we talk to the liaison officers only. We trust them. We don't know you and it's really suspicious that you came all the way down here."

"We're from the relatively close-by local bureau," the driving agent said, staring at him. "We're not here to harm you, just ask a few things about the weapons you used."

"Mostly already in storage. I grabbed when they sent me up there from London."

"London?" the first agent demanded. "That's stored in London?"

"Did you think the old Council didn't have weapons when huge things popped up?"

"We didn't hear a lot about them or from them. Which we did like a lot."

"Yeah but they had problems like kidnaping slayers from their families. We didn't like that. And if we're more open then you guys can help us protect yourselves instead of whining at us for doing it for you like we got after LA."

"Point. A lot of us would like to spare little girls hunting."

"So would we, which is why we don't allow it," Xander quipped.

"Even twenty-year-old girls are little girls in their minds," the driving agent said blandly. "We really aren't here to harm you. You could relax and cooperate."

"And I could also remember that there's three different prices on my head," Xander quipped back, shifting his stance. "And that the things you want to know probably won't be coming out of my mouth." They grunted in displeasure. "I have no idea where the old Council got the weapons from."

"Where do you get yours from?"

"Here and there. I've had to fix a few things, I've stolen a few things when necessary, I've bought a few things. I traded for something. Then the guy gave me an extra one when he saw why I needed it. I invited him to bring it to the battle." He grinned. "He was a bit horrified."

"We are too," the driving agent said. "Can't you send them back underground?"

"Sure, go back in time and take all the cameras out of LA," he said blandly.

"Can't do that."

"Us either. It does make the job harder when people come up to whine at the slayers in the mall."

The agents both nodded. "Does that happen a lot?"

"Yes." He pulled up a youtube video on his phone. "Taken by one of the other slayers while one was being complained to." He let them see it. "As proof that they do it."

They both grimaced at the loud complaining at the young slayer about there being demons messing up her reality. Though the slayer getting sassy made them smile. "I'd consider that whining as well," the driving agent said. He handed the phone back. "How soon before another battle?"

Xander shrugged. "How would I know?" They gave him 'don't be stupid' looks. "I didn't see the last one. That was Fury's shit. Just like outing me was." He stared at them. "I haven't seen one for here locally but I've only seen four of the eighteen we've had. I only see apocalypse battles. The next one I've seen I sent in a few months back. Including to your people since part of it was in London. You might see if Kennedy was hiding anything else."

"We heard about that. Did your people punish her?"

"Yup, and her girlfriend screamed at her a lot while they were at Lord Kreth's house."

"He's a what?"

"Asgardian."

"Oh." They nodded. "Is he involved?"

"One of his grandchildren is a future slayer."

"That's fine then. He probably understands warriors better than anyone else in the normal life," the other agent decided. "Do you have any idea if we're having a battle down here soon?"

Xander shrugged. "There's always a chance of one. Bigger chances near special events like the convergence that got the one in London recently. Or certain holidays." They nodded but grimaced. "I only see apocalypse battles, guys. I haven't seen one for this area for years yet."

"That's good to know. Can we have your phone number in case something does pop up so someone can come handle it with us?" He handed over his card. "Thank you."

"I hand those out like candy to people like military leaders I had to tell. I also run training sessions for ones that want to hear it."

"That's even better. Thank you, Mr. Harris, and you can probably be less paranoid."

Xander snorted. "I've already had one that tried to burn me in my truck for being a seer. Sure I can. He walked off. "Have a good trip back." He spotted his young slayer staring and took the machete from her. "You're too young for that." She scowled but he grinned and walked her back there, telling her to relax and why the agents had been there. Her mother sighed in displeasure but it wasn't his fault.

***

Darcy Lewis looked up from her reading in the park break from Jane, smiling at the man staring at her. "Yes?"

"Miss Lewis?" the agent asked.

"I am. But you knew that. What's up?" She put her book in her bag.

"What do you know about the Council?"

"Not a lot. They were guarding my boss to keep people from snatching her for her work. We ended up hiding near some of them before the people in HYDRA or whoever attacked them."

The agent nodded. "That's reasonable. Why your boss?"

"She's a physicist and Thor's girlfriend. The senior Council people thought it'd be a good idea if she's watched over so no one snatches her for any reason."

"Oh. I see." He nodded once. "The girls?"

"They're probably fine. They were when we all checked after that battle. They made sure the slayers weren't going to have to kill humans."

"Yes, that's good of them. Do you think they're still here?"

"I'm fairly certain most of the slayers are back where they should be. Including the ones in the local house."

"That's good. We just wanted to make sure of what you knew about them. That way some things can't really be leaked out." He pulled something but he got hit from behind by the guy Darcy was staring at.

"Thank you," she chirped with a smile. "Who're you?"

He grinned back. "You missed me in New Mexico, Miss Lewis. I'm Agent Barton."

She stood up to shake his hand. "Any idea who he was?"

"Old Council." She rolled her eyes. "There's a few that missed the purge and didn't get rehired because they were dicks."

"I can call the local house."

"Please."

She called. "Hi, it's Darcy Lewis....no, no one stole Jane. We have an old white guy who is apparently old Council that tried to take me out in the park for knowing you guys. Do you have someone to handle him?" She nodded, taking down the number. "I can do that. Thanks." She hung up and called him. "Agent Keith, it's Darcy Lewis. Yes, Jane Foster's assistant. Agent Barton just knocked out an old Council guy who was going to shoot me for knowing about the girls." She looked around. "By a pretty statue of Athena in a park."

Clint took the phone. "It's Agent Barton. I knocked him out when he pulled a gun on her. We're in the riding park near Foster's apartment. Thank you, yes, there." He hung up and tossed her back the phone. "I can wait with you."

She grinned. "That's fine. I don't mind pretty men waiting with me." She made room on the bench. "You can even sit. I'm not biting today."

He grinned, settling beside her on the bench. When the guy groaned, Clint got up to hit him again then sat back down. They both waved as two officers and an agent showed up. "Him, guys. He tried to pull a gun on a pretty lady who was reading."

"Who're you, sir?" the officer asked.

"Former Agent Clint Barton, SHIELD. One of the decent ones."

"That's fine then. Did you use a weapon to knock him out?"

"Punch to the head."

"Even better." He pulled a gun. "Let's go then."

"Excuse you?" Darcy asked. "No." The guy glared at her. She pointed off to the right. "I think we're waiting on him. Agent Keith?"

"I have no idea who they are or what they think they're doing," the said as he walked over. "But they're going to quit it. MI-5, boys." He held up his badge. The trio ran off. "Hmm." He called his partner, who had their images and was searching. "Ah! Old liners as Xander calls them." He looked at her. "They're apparently against the girls being outed and all that."

"Not like they could've kept it inside after the invasion in LA," Darcy said. "Or the one in Miami."

"True but they're not reasonable sorts. That's why Rupert wouldn't rehire them." He checked the one on the ground and got his backup to take him with them. "Are you all right?" he asked her.

"Are they going to keep going?" she asked.

"We'll try to stop them. Though, your taser is illegal in this city." He stared at her for a moment then smiled. "Find another way that's not a gun."

"Sure, I can suddenly become a ninja or learn magic or something," she said dryly.

"That's fine. If you do end up tazing them, they'd probably just try to confiscate it." He looked at the former agent. "Thank you for helping her and can you please remove your teammates from London?"

"Nope. They called a meeting here."

"That's bad. If you need to do something, let us know," he said, handing over his card. "Thank you." He walked off after the body haulers/investigative team. They were not going to be happy.

"I think I need to call the head guys," Darcy said.

"Might help," he agreed, grinning at her. "You just lead an exciting life, don't you?"

"It's all at once since most of my time is spent nagging Jane to remember this reality." She called the number she had for Willow, the only one she had. "It's Darcy Lewis. One of your former people just tried to shoot me so I couldn't tell anyone about you guys. Yup, one of them. Agent Keith has him and another three tried but he ran them off." She listened. "That's who he said they were. Thank you, Willow." She hung up. "I think that was Kennedy."

"Could be. They're still together. We're not sure *why*," Clint said with a grin. "But I guess it's like being in love with an alcoholic or anyone with a personality disorder." Darcy tried not to grin. "C'mon, I'll escort you back to Thor's side."

"Isn't he at the meeting with you guys?"

"Hopefully. That's the idea of us being over here." He walked her off, taking her to the meeting area. Where Jane and Eric were too. Eric Selvig gave him a horrified, pouty look. "Relax, Doctor Selvig. Like you I got healed from the damage Loki caused." He nodded. Darcy patted Eric on the arm. "Old Council people just tried to make sure she wouldn't talk about the girls."

"Really?" Jane demanded, looking at Darcy.

"Came up to me in the park," Darcy sighed. "Their agent friend showed up to get them."

"Good!"

"We want your team safer anyway," Stark said, staring at them. "Including your sassy sidekick and assistant scientist."

"Intern, please. I'm not the science sort. I'm a political science sort."

Stark frowned. "Really?"

"Darcy stays. She does things so I know how to find them later," Jane ordered.

"That's fine." Stark smiled at her, leering a bit. "We could find her another assistant's position."

"I thought you had a redheaded lady who can kick your butt for that already," Darcy quipped back.

Stark smiled. "Yes, I do, and she's fantastic and could use another assistant I can tease." He looked at Barton. "Old line Council?" He nodded. "Charming. Do they know?"

"I called," Darcy said. "I don't know if whoever I told will tell others."

Stark nodded. "They really need more people."

"There's a few good agents who are applying," Clint said. "They would make good field watchers and spare Xander a lot of work."

"That could help, yup," Darcy quipped. "Though I think he's hiding in Africa."

Natasha Romanoff nodded. "He is." They all smiled at her. "We can set up Jane's lab so it's comfortable for all of you and yet safer."

"You mean not in my mother's flat?" Jane asked dryly.

"That as well," Natasha agreed. "There's a few places that would do excellently with your chosen field of study. It would also get Thor out of harm's way if something happened locally."

Around the room, phones started to go off with the same text message: Get out of London, something's tracking you and is going to attack by tonight if they can do it in a way that'll cause problems for more than you. If you're somewhere quieter it'll just attack you.

Darcy looked at her phone's message then at Jane. "Let's take a roadtrip, Jane." Thor looked at Darcy's phone then nodded. "Upcountry?"

"We're going toward open fields," Stark agreed. "That's Harris' number so probably a vision?"

Darcy sent that back, nodding at what she got back. "Vision, it's a demon, it's a shape changing demon, and it wants to be a primadonna but can't manage it without taking out something huge with people watching." She looked up.

"Got it," Stark agreed. "People, want to visit Stonehenge or something?"

"Watch out for the old Council's remains out that way," Jane said. "That's where they were blown up." They nodded and broke up the meeting to go hide for a few days. Thor went with his teammates after kissing Jane stupid. Darcy got to drive them up toward where Jane could see real stars without smog at night.

***

Xander put down his phone, rubbing his head. "I hate visions."

The mini slayer got him some water. "Thank you for having them."

"You're welcome." He patted her on the arm. "Go work on the workbook while I fight the headache?" She nodded. Later that night, Stark wrote him about who or what it was. He told him and where it was watching him. She had a camera online to film her when she attacked them. He got a groan and they found her and beat her. Not what that demon princess wanted. Then her big brother showed up and he was a problem but when Thor held him down and told him why they had beaten his sister, he called in his family to scream at her and them. Thankfully they managed to save the team and when Stark found her weapons he could disarm them. So another problem solved for a bit. Even if Stark was ranting about how demons shouldn't be able to get nuclear level devices out of thin air.

***

Xander looked around the filmy realm he found himself in. "Cool, a dream walk. I haven't done this since the shaman showed me how." He looked at the blond man staring at him. "Hi again."

"Hey," Tommy said, staring at him. "Are you ready to give up and do what you have to do so we all survive?"

"I thought that's what I've been doing."

"Not that way and don't play dumb."

Xander grinned. "You do realize you're asking me this right before a battle in two days?"

"There is?"

"Yeah, there is. Including one in New York. Again."

"Crap."

"Yup. I've got one, the main house has two, one on each coast. London has one...." He smirked. "You have shit timing."

"Yeah, I do. Want to talk about this after the battle?"

"If I survive. I've got my battle with maybe two local militaries and three slayers." Tommy groaned, shaking his head. "I'm damn good but there's always a chance. If so, there's three places where I've got my warped sperm stored. You can make a next generation if I die."

"I can do that."

"It's in my safety deposit box in LA. The executor of my estate is Dawn."

"I can tell them that. Thanks, kid, and good luck. Do we know about this?"

"We warned. No one listened," he said with a shrug. "Like usual." Tommy nodded. "Sorry. The timing may be off and I did note that it was wobbling on time code but even then it'll be an extra week."

"Thanks. Really."

"At least the one in New York won't fully knock New Jersey off the coastline. It's going to try but it can't fully do it."

"Understood. Be safer than usual and we'll talk to you in the hospital."

"Sure. I like having visitors. I never get visitors." He nodded and left.

Xander woke up, blinking at the tent roof then went back to sleep. He really needed sleep before the battle, even if it was in a week.

***

Darcy looked outside the window at the loud 'bang' that went off. "Thor, we've got a huge demon stomping this way," she called. "Um, and looking right at me. Jane, move!" she shouted. "Let's go, now, people!" They ran from the building, taking Jane's research binders with her. Darcy got the others in the building out thanks to the fire alarm. The demon swatted the building to make the noise stop and while trying to grab Jane. Thor stepped in to save them so she and Jane could get away. Eric was out in the country again so it was just them heading for a shelter.

An officer pointed. "In there, ladies."

"We think it may want my boss," Darcy panted.

"Still, in there." They ran into the shelter that was underground near the Tube. The officers down there made sure they were safe but one herded them to a side area of the hallway.

"What happened?" he demanded.

Darcy shrugged. "I heard a bang, looked outside, spotted her staring our way so I got us out, pulled the alarm to get the other residents out, and then we ran. She swatted our building to get the noise I guess." She pushed her hair back. "The demon did make a grab for Jane but Thor distracted her."

"We knew you're around Thor," the officer said sarcastically. "Is she here for him?"

"No clue. She didn't say anything but she sure wanted to grab Jane."

"Why you then?" the officer demanded.

"I'm a physicist and I'm rebuilding the Rainbow Bridge."

"Oh, lord help us," he moaned, shaking his head. "Why?"

"So Thor can get home now and then to see his mom?" Darcy guessed. "So the warriors stuck down here can get home maybe?"

"I guess. Go rest, ladies." They went in to do that while he called his higher ups. It was worse than he thought - educated meddlers *and* superheros with capes. Charming!

***

Buffy was in LA and Faith had New York. Buffy's demons were all larger and making fun of the slayers as they tried to grab them to eat. The girls were really mad at the picking on their clothes. They had killed two of the demons. There were eight more but they could handle it. The military was on their way and they had agents helping them this time.

Faith looked at her demon horde, shaking her head. "Excuse me?" she demanded. "Did you just act like a teenage girl and try to diss the clothes? Even the minis are better behaved than you." The demons growled and tried to attack but the NYPD had a faster response time than the LAPD and they had people already showing up with heavier weapons to help the slayer team. She looked at the commander near her. "I don't know why we suddenly got the weak minded ones. Usually the demons that try to invade have plans and skills, not teenage girl angst."

"Don't knock it," he complained. "Smart ones would be worse and harder to kill."

"Probably true. Ladies, she thinks you're a ho. Let's get them down and out before they kick off a fault line and take out part of the city!" They rushed in to handle it.

***

Xander looked at someone at his battle. "I did warn you!" he shouted at her. "I warned you a week ago!" The battle commander quit whining. "I warned you, I warned your government, I warned your newspapers. If someone didn't tell you, then maybe you should read the papers!" He pointed. "Let's get them gone before they kill everyone? Please?" He dove back into his battle. The military units weren't helping much but it was something. "If I'm the only one fighting, you're all going to die," he shouted suddenly. That got some more help in. Not enough but some. Then the glorious rest of the military showed up and took on the two demons. Xander was injured and it wasn't going to be enough. But he'd handle it as long as he could. And then he'd be in a hospital, probably.

***

Xander woke up, blinking at the bright white room. Then at the woman standing next to the bed. "Where am I this time?" he mumbled.

"New York."

"Hey, they won," he muttered, then took a long blink. This time a new woman was standing there. "Hill, not who I wanted to wake up to."

"Tough," she said, smiling some. "Before you can ask, you won. Buffy and Faith's teams both won. There were injuries, including them and you. There are three less slayers." Xander grimaced but nodded. "There's a huge amount of complaining about the battles on the news."

"I had to yell at one that I did warn them."

"So did we when someone started. Including pointing out on the news you warned us all."

"Without my name?" he asked dryly.

"Yes, without your name." He blinked but nodded. "You're going to be in here for weeks, Harris. You have a skull fracture and they saved both your legs when she stomped on them."

He lifted the sheet to look at them then at her. "Huh."

"Good drugs?" she asked dryly.

"Could've been much worse." She huffed. "I took on two of them basically on my own, Hill. The local militaries weren't much help for at least an hour. They barely shot at them and tried to block but once one of them stepped on a tank they fell back to horrified awe setting."

"We saw. It was covered. The president of that country was on the news watching as it happened bragging about his people so they saw it as it happened. He's the one who called in better military support."

"Thank him for me. My girls?"

"Both up the hallway. You guys have this whole wing of the hospital." Xander grimaced. "You're the only guy so you get a private room."

"Thanks. Maybe it'll keep down the nagging."

"Not likely. Summers is up the hall with a broken hip but they have her in a wheelchair."

"Lock the door?"

"Nurses won't let us." She stared at him. "I'm going to give you some free advice. This is when you take a vacation."

"Yes I do. Preferably with bikinis and slutty girls who might like guys with a limp and an eyepatch."

She nodded. "I'll recommend a few beaches when you're able to go." She stared at him for a minute. "You'll be fine?"

"As long as no one breaks in here."

"We'll try to keep your ex's out."

"Then who'll fuss over me?"

"We'll keep them away from everyone else then." She walked off, going to tell Fury that he was awake and joking. She ran into a known Xander ex-girlfriend. "He's on four west," she said bluntly, staring at her. "He's tired, he's sore, he's got broken legs, and he's at the pitiful stage of pouting if you're going to see Xander."

"I am. Someone's got to rescue him from the new price on his head for being a seer." She smirked. "Thank you, Agent Hill. Have fun with your boss." She went up to baby and watch over Xander. He smiled weakly at her. "There's a new price on your head for being a seer."

"Fuck 'em, they can save themselves."

"True, they could start doing that soon. Especially since you saw another battle in a week and no one's going to be there."

"I warned 'em."

"We know, Xander." She came over to fluff his pillows and do some light fussing over him. She really should take him out since her supervisors had demanded she do that, but she liked him too much. They'd figure it out later.

***

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