Ancient History. by Voracity2
Summary: Darcy has known Loki for a *very* long time. Yet they can't really get together in a significant way. So she decides to arrange things to help him not make a huge mistake she foresaw.
Categories: Non-Buffy Stories & Crossovers > Avengers Characters: None
Series: HET!
Chapters: 3 Completed: Yes Word count: 36708 Read: 23871 Published: 03/17/2022 Updated: 03/17/2022
Story Notes:
Het, very HET, but not graphically HET.

1. Part 1 by Voracity2

2. Part 2 by Voracity2

3. Part 3 by Voracity2

Part 1 by Voracity2
1619:

The young woman looked up from tending the plants around the small cottage's borders when she heard the hoofbeats. Horses out there weren't that common and many riders together was probably not a great thing. She went back to her plants when she noticed it was a group of men riding past. She wanted no part of that.

"You, girl," one of the riders called. "Are your parents about?"

She straightened up to look at them. She was fifteen, a late fifteen, but still clearly nearly an adult. "They died in the last plague, sir. Why do you ask?"

"We were going to hunt in your woods. The townspeople said not to anger you, the witch," the rider in charge said smugly.

"These are not my woods," she said patiently. "And I'm no witch. They're just scared that I didn't go running and crying to the abbey when my parents died." She wiped her hands off. She pointed. "The woods beyond the stream belong to the local duke. And he does not allow hunting. The closer woods belong to the village." She pointed that way. "Go ask the headman at the tavern. He holds court there." She got back to her plants.

"You could be nicer," he sneered. "Witch."

She glared at him. "I'm not old enough to have learned manners with those who don't realize that talking thus to a child is wrong," she shot back. They huffed off. She got back to work. "Have to plant to eat," she reminded herself. "Though this is boring. Still." She heard hoofbeats, this time a single rider, coming back and ignored them. Until that man grabbed her then she stuck her gardening shovel into his arm to make him let go. "Do not grab me. That's the surest way to make me a witch." The man backed up, looking alarmed. She looked behind her. "Good morrow, Headman."

"Darcy," he said with a nod. "Is there a problem?"

"This one thought me an enticing witch apparently," she said dryly, getting back to her planting. "I must plant to eat. I'm not old enough to entertain the energies of men either."

"No, you're not. Though close enough," he noted.

She glared at him. "My mother warned me of thus before she died. I'd rather be a witch in the woods." She got back to planting. "At least then I only have to take care of myself."

"He could help you prepare lands."

She snorted. "Like the Widow's sons do hers? Or like you help your wife plant her vegetables?" She stood up to look at him. "Show me one man in the village who does that. Please." He grimaced. "The only one I've seen was Farmer Goody over in the next village and that's because his wife was nearly dead from carrying her next child from him. And did die of it so he's all alone to do it now until his sons bury him or he remarries. Why would any woman want that?"

He looked up then at her. "It is the Holy way, child."

"Then God can come tell me that. Not the priest that has two girlfriends, but God himself can come tell me that." He went pale. She stared back. "I may not be a witch right now, but I will learn fast to become one if I'm forced from my family home and onto some *man's* dirty energies."

"I see that point. Most of the local men are scared of you anyway."

"Because I don't sob like the Widows do? Probably." She got back to work. "I really must work on the plants. I got a late start thanks to all that rain."

"Point." He stared at the rider, who stomped off. "That's not wise, child."

"I'm fifteen. If he wants children I'm outside his range and if he likes women I'm still outside his range. And by the time I'm within the range of a woman I'll have a knife made to stab myself when they show up." She smiled at him. "That would probably stop all but the most wrong. Correct? Like the widows did during the war?"

"Yes. Though I can see your mother shared the wrong stories."

She shrugged. "It doesn't suit women to be ignorant of how men really are. And men have yet to prove her wrong."

"Some day you'll regret that."

"If God himself comes to tell me that I must marry, perhaps."

He nodded, walking off looking amused. "I'll send my wife to talk to you, Darcy."

"Thank thee, but why?"

"Womanly education, child."

"Yes, sir." She got back to things, shaking her head. "Men really are the most aggravating things," she muttered to the plants. "And if I had magic, my plants wouldn't die as often. And my chickens would be laying eggs again." She grimaced but went to check on that then came back to the plants. "Mayhap I'll ask the farmers for advice on how to prepare the soil better next year if I should survive the winter."

***

Months later Darcy looked up as she finished her bathing, getting out and glaring at the blood that had started to appear. "I know not why you're happening but I'm not ill," she told it. "I know I'm not ill. I'm peeved but not sickly." She got redressed and sighed, going back to the barn to get to work with the goat out there. One of her last chickens was dead so she settled in to pluck it and handle the meat to be eaten that night.

She felt a cramp and moaned, holding her stomach. "Oh, dear. Maybe I am sickly." She winced, getting up to take the chicken into the house to put on the stove to boil. Her mother had shown her that many years ago. She held onto the wall, wincing through the cramps. "Oh, holy fuck as that bard said," she muttered. She finally straightened up and took a few deep breaths. She felt the mess and went to clean up again.

"I should go ask the widows." She looked around to make sure nothing would burn down the house, then went to hike to the village. The widows would be by the market right now. She had to pause a few times to lean on a tree. She nearly felt like crying for some reason. She looked up at the sound of a cart, nodding at the priest, who was giving her odd looks. "Stomach cramps. I probably cooked wrong," she quipped. "I'm going to ask the widows."

"Get in the cart, Darcy. I'll make sure you get there." She nodded, climbing into the back to curl up. He recognized that look and at her age.... He drove on, shaking his head. He ran into one of the older widows in town, pulling up beside her. "She thinks she cooked wrong. I found her leaning on a tree holding her stomach."

The old widow looked at the girl. "It's a good time to talk of womanly things," she decided, helping the poor girl out and to her outhouse to clean up again then inside to have some tea and talk to her. "What do you know of becoming a woman, Darcy?"

"I am?"

"Yes. That blood speaks of it." Darcy moaned, shaking her head. "It means your body prepares in case it wants to have a child."

She shook her head. "No thank thee."

"It's not often up to a woman. It's up to her husband."

She stared at her. "My mother warned of the curse on the women in my family to die when your daughter reached fifteen," she said quietly. "As her mother had on her and her grandmother had on her own daughter." The widow winced. "I need not a man at this time in my life."

"No, you do not. You're too young. Perhaps in a few years?"

"So I die in another fifteen after that?"

"Point. You could become a nun."

"That's for wealthy women who have callings. I have neither wealth or a calling." She sighed, rubbing her stomach. "Can I stop it?"

"We all wish, girl. Every single woman. It's a curse on us from God for the apple." Darcy winced but slouched. "Now, let's talk about womanly duties?" Darcy nodded, letting her tell her about how to run a house. It let Darcy ask about her chickens and how to get baby chickens again. Which was how she learned how children came to be. At least humans didn't have to lay eggs.

***

Darcy was twenty, and pretty, when the next bard came through the village. This one didn't seem very nice. He seemed slick and like the traders that came through. She didn't like that one as much and he wasn't a great singer. The village's men seemed to guard the local girls from him so she realized she should do the same.

The man smiled at her when he found her in the market. She nodded politely, looking at the farmer at the stand. His father had passed on last year so he had taken it over on him. "I think it's time for new chickens. They've stopped laying and the male won't even go near them. I haven't had chicks in months. Those are barely old enough to lay."

"Aye, Darcy. They should be able to handle the rooster if they're laying eggs."

"He killed one of my two hens though."

"He did?" She nodded. "Then it's probably time for a new rooster and hens."

She whined then sighed. "I have ten copper from the last thing I wove." She let him see it. "And I have to get some seeds. My beets died again."

He nodded with a grin. "Beets are picky to grow, Darcy." She nodded with a sigh. "Let me talk to Marjorie. We may have an older hen that is old enough for one last set of eggs."

"Thank thee, Farmer Goody."

"Welcome, Darcy. Have you heard our new bard?"

"Last week at church." He nodded, going to talk to his wife. She sighed at the wife, who was smiling. "My rooster kills the baby hens."

"Males can be that way. Is he separate?" Darcy nodded. "Did you just toss one in there with him?"

"I let him have the two hens I have for a few days. And he killed one and chased the other all over."

"Hmm. Sounds like he's fit for a stew pot. And you'd need more chickens." Darcy winced but nodded. "What else is going on?"

"My beets died. Of course. I have the worst luck with them but I need them for the dyes."

"Yes, dear. How much do you have?"

"Ten copper?"

"Do you have anything woven right now?"

"Some light yellow from the flowers." She showed her. "I'm working on the embroidery. It'll take forever to finish it though. And I know my hand's not great."

"That's pretty. For your future dress?"

She smiled and shook her head. "I do not look in gold."

"True." She took the cloth from her with a wink and the coins, getting her a few young hens, another rooster, and her husband threw in a few plants. "Now, keep the roosters from the hens, and each other," she ordered.

"Yes, ma'am. This one can live inside for a bit until I can put up the fences."

"Good girl. Just let them have one hen. Let the new one have your older hen, they're not related so it should go easier."

"Yes, Ma'am. Thank thee!" She hugged her and took her things back home to arrange things.

"Plant a few of the bones from the last chicken near the beets but not underneath," her husband called.

"Yes, Farmer Goody! Thank thee!"

"Welcome, Darcy." He sighed, looking at his wife, who smiled and nodded. He looked at the bard. "She's a darling girl."

"No father to help her?"

"He died in a plague when she was fifteen."

"That poor woman." He looked after her. "The village is helping her find a husband?"

"We expected her to take up herbcraft," his wife said dryly. "But she weaves instead. Doesn't embroider well and her work is spotty on timing sometimes, but she's a good woman. Someday she'll ease up and not hate the idea of marriage." She looked at her husband. "The new priest?"

"We've all talked to him about her. He tried to complain she was a witch until the elder widows spoke to him as a group."

She smiled. "Some day I'll join their number. I hope I have a good enough pan to aid their duties to the children of the village." She went back to her tending the animals for sale.

The bard nodded, going to talk to that priest about that girl.

***

Darcy got a visit that night, nodding as she straightened up from her planting. "Father."

"Darcy." He stared at her. "You're old enough to leave this farm and go find a true husband."

"That doesn't mean I want that."

"It's a woman's duty to God."

She stared at him. "My mother taught me to read. Nowhere in your book does it say that." He glared. "If it was so, then widows would be forcefully remarried. And they're not. Nuns would be forcefully married and they're not. Not all women thrive in marriages and I cannot believe God would want their lives wasted."

"They have children."

"And is that all a woman is good for?"

"Yes."

She snorted. "And yet, the women in the bible are all helpmates, not whores." He flinched back. "I believe I'll quit attending the church, Father. Thank you for telling me that women are worthless. Though I must say that my monthlies don't happen regularly so therefore I probably can't have children." He shuddered, backing away from her. She stared at him. "That scares you?"

"That would brand you a witch!"

"Only if I'm forced to learn to be one." She smiled. "I find that many push me to want to study that some days, mostly when I have my monthlies." He stomped off. She waved. "I've already talked to the widows about my options. There's no way I can marry anyone in this village," she called. He glared back at her. "Not like I haven't seen them and they're not liking me as a wife. God will tell me when it's time."

He huffed but couldn't refute that argument. She went back to her plants. "Mayhap I should move to a farm a bit away," she told herself. "Where it would be safe from men who have ideas." Someone grabbed her and she shrieked but kicked and struggled, finally getting free of that priest. Then she grabbed her knife. "That is not what God would order you to do."

"I can make you a holy woman again," he said.

"You try and you can find yourself eating your manhood."

He sneered. "You could not, witch."

"You might want to think about that. No one else here to butcher for the fall." He backed up looking alarmed. She stared back at that bard. "And yet another man. Are you here to help him?" she demanded.

"No. I was not."

"Good. Then take him with you. I need to speak to the headman about him."

"He'll never listen to you, witch."

"Were I a witch, you'd be dead," she reminded him. He looked pale at that. "Oh, fuck this. HELP!" she shrieked. One of the nearest farmer's sons ran over as soon as he could. "He grabbed me and accused me of being a witch!" She pointed. "And then there's this one." She pointed at the amused looking bard.

"Jesus would be mad if you were a witch and a witch would not have her plantings die," the father said as he stomped into view.

"She cannot have children by her own admission," the priest said with a point at her. "She must be a witch."

"Neither can my new wife. That doesn't make *her* a witch." He stared at him. Then at the bard. "Why're you here?" Darcy shrugged.

"I came to see why she was so amusing to the locals."

"She's much like her mother was," the farmer told him. "Do leave, sir." He pointed. "Now. Thank thee." The bard strolled off. Darcy sighed in relief. The priest got walked off by him. "Boy, stay with her tonight," he ordered.

"Yes, Father." He looked at Darcy. "You okay?" he asked.

She nodded. "Were I a witch he'd be dead. I have to go milk the goat. Want to come watch me fight her?"

"Sure." He looked amused but went with her. The knife went back into her pocket. He looked at the goat. "Is she giving milk?"

"Not much."

"She might need to have another baby goat."

Darcy looked at him. "I hate hearing her do that."

"Aye, we all do. I'm hoping my future wife doesn't make such noises as ours do." He frowned. "I'll see if my father will let her lay with our males." Darcy smiled and nodded, going to get what milk she could. Then gather the late eggs. She had some baby chickens running around again at least. Most of her garden was growing well. He went in to help her fix the cheese for dinner. She laid her own fires and made him tea too. So that was nice.

Though the cheese had been overly salted. Sometimes those things happened in the kitchen. They both looked outside when something thumped. The shed around the chickens had fallen. He went to see what had happened. "The chicks are fine," he called. "One of the roosters is dead."

"He can be stew tomorrow," she sighed, going to help him fix that. "I apparently could not tie knots."

He grinned. "That takes stronger hands than most women have. You tie smaller knots than we do." He tied it up for her, making her sigh as she picked up the two dead birds to go pluck and gut for the dinner pot. He followed, shaking his head. She was weird but nice enough he guessed. Thankfully his mother had decided his wife would come from a village about two hours away where her cousin lived.

When his father came back he told him about the goat and the roof. Darcy had collapsed on the table while plucking the chickens. He had nicely finished it for her and put them into the stew pot to cook overnight. They'd talk to her tomorrow about perhaps moving somewhere she could weave for others. Ones who would not look at her oddly for daring to be a single woman taking care of a cottage. It would be safer for her to be somewhere bigger.

***

1635

***

Darcy looked up as the performer at the tavern took the stage to sing of old battles. She sighed mentally but she was only there to grab something to eat for dinner. She had spent all day weaving for the local tailor. Her back hurt. She was too tired to cook anything and hadn't had anything to put into the pot to soak and cook all day. She felt something from that bard but ignored it greatly. She was too tired to deal with men tonight. One of the locals stared at her. She ignored him too. He tried to grab her wrist so she glared and he had to let go.

She had stabbed someone last week who had grabbed her. The tavern owner had laughed and agreed she was not for rent. She accepted the small dish of food. "Thank thee," she said quietly. "Let me go collapse at home. I'll wash it and bring it back in the morn." She left, going back to her place. It was a pretty little room. Rented from her boss. It came out of her paycheck, which wasn't much but it was something at least. She made it through the night with odd dreams of that bard. She'd ignore all weird things. She was too tired to deal with that.

She came to work the next morning to find her boss glaring. She looked. "I wasn't on that one," she said when he pointed. "I was working with the blue." She pointed. "I only have the one dropped area and it's in the pattern." She showed him the pattern. He groaned but nodded. "I have not worked with that one in months, and that was to thread that loom."

"Who was working there?"

She shrugged. "I wasn't paying attention to more than my loom. I never do or else I get distracted by the men out back being idiots with the horses in the stable." He had complained about that repeatedly so he just huffed and went to talk to the other weaving people. She settled in to get back to work, checking her last few lines. She did have one more dropped spot and unwove two lines to fix that then redid them carefully. Her boss glared at her. "One dropped stitch and I fixed it."

"That was due to be used yesterday, Darcy."

"I've only had it a week and you wanted me to do another foot of it." She looked at him. "I'm doing the best I can." He glared. She stared back and got back to work, working carefully but quickly. It was all she could do. He stomped off. Thankfully the last few things from home were always kept on her since he had apparently went through her apartment later that night.

She left the next day. She wouldn't put up with that. That bard that had given her the weird dreams was on the same train so that was weird but it happened. She went to the next town that had weaving jobs. The same deal, and just as poorly paid, but she was used to that. It happened to single women.

***

Six months later, Darcy looked up from her current job helping fit a gown to some high born woman when the bell rang. That bard? That was definitely weird. She got back to her work. "We need to pull this to the side," she said quietly. "The seam's frayed in that area." She showed the tailor, who groaned. It was a dress remake. "To fix that I'd have to cut the fabric down and reweave the whole side seam."

He grimaced but nodded. Darcy got it adjusted over and pinned. There was still a weak spot and she pointed it out to the tailor once she had gone. Thankfully thinner skirts were in fashion right now. She went to the back to go back to her weaving to get away from that weird bard.

"Aye, sir, what can I help you with today?" the tailor asked with a smile.

"I believe I knew her mother."

"Darcy's mother? She said she died."

"She did," Darcy called. "When I was fifteen."

The bard blinked. "I know of your mother, chit." She came out to stare at him. "I knew of her whole family." He moved closer, touching the simple necklace she wore. "That should be in your hair," he said quietly.

She pushed his hand off. "I know that. Why do you care?"

"You have aunts."

"I wish they had made themselves known. I can write a letter if you'd deliver it." She smiled at him.

"I can do thus." He stared at her. She stared back. There was something weird about him. She backed up and the staring was broken. "I can deliver that letter in a few weeks if you wish."

"Please. I'll write it out after work tonight."

"Fine." He nodded and left her to it.

She looked at the tailor, who shrugged. "So very weird."

"Very," he agreed. "Be careful of his sort. A woman would get a reputation."

She nodded. "Not something I need," she agreed. "Or the possibility of a child." She went back to work, thinking about that. The seamstress came over. She pointed. "That's a weak spot and the seam has one too," she said with another point. She looked at her. "I told him."

"That's fine, Darcy." She looked it over. "There's a few weak seams." She sighed. "It's been remade many times."

"Fancy clothes are expensive," Darcy agreed with a smile for her. The other woman went to handle that remake while Darcy got back to the simple, dark blue cloth she was weaving right now. Her string broke and she sighed, having to undo that whole row and knot the string to start over. The knot could be hidden to the side. The string broke again and she stared at it. "Who did we get this one from?" she muttered. She tested it and groaned. The other two weavers looked up.

"Second string break in a line." They came to look at the threads. She wasn't pulling too hard. It was definitely the string. The tailor came in to check on that and groaned about it too. He got her a different spool, letting them test it. It broke too. "At least I have a few yards of fabric," she decided. "I only have five foot left of this weave." She looked at the tailor, who grimaced but got her some more thread. That worked mostly. She still had some breaks but not as many. All carefully spliced at the edges so the knots could be hidden.

That night she walked into her rented room, finding that same bard. "That's very presumptions." She left the door open. He stared at her. "I want no bad rumors spread of me."

"I can understand that." He stared at her. "Do you know your mother's people?"

"No. She didn't say much beyond the curse."

"Curse?"

"When a daughter reaches fifteen the mothers in our family die."

"That was cast by an ancient being," he admitted, staring at her. "There is much to know." She stared at him. "You have noticed you don't age as the others?" She nodded she realized that. She looked twenty-two and was nine years older than that. "It is from your mother's family." He stood up to look at her. "You will not age that fast for however long you manage to not have that daughter." She grimaced. "Have you had one?"

"No. I've avoided that. The widows taught me how to do that."

"Good." He smiled. "You're one of the last of your family."

"If only they knew of me."

"There's a few who may know," he admitted. "Your father was probably trying to set you up with them as a marriage."

"Which would bring about a daughter."

"Your mother did not have one for over a century," he said. She winced. "Yes, you will age slowly for a very long time," he said quietly. He made sure no one could hear since others were coming in. They paused when they saw him. "Just getting that letter for her aunts. I will not shut the door."

"Good," one older woman agreed as she stared at him. "You should have a chaperone."

"I'm not going to encourage any man," Darcy reminded her. "Men just bring problems."

"Aye, often," she agreed. "Good ones are very rare." She stared at that bard. Darcy sat down to write the letter of introduction and he took it from her to go deliver. She looked at Darcy. "Are you well?"

"I'm good. Thank you, ma'am." She looked at her. "It's weird but he claims he knew an aunt of mine and my mother."

"Interesting. You should not go near men like that."

"He was here when I got in. I did not invite him." Her face hardened. "I got out earlier because I was working with the dyes." She showed off her hands. "And I didn't have the things there to soak them clean so they wouldn't ruin more fabric."

"Oh, dear. I'll see how he got let in." She went to talk to the woman who ran the rooming house. She was an old lady and asleep in her chair. That explained a lot. That poor Darcy.

Darcy settled in to think about that new information. It seemed fantastic but if they were witches as she had been called repeatedly....

Maybe she should study something like herbalism after all.

***

It took over a year before she ran into that same bard. And she was in a different city, again. Her last tailor had burned down. Mostly of his own hand. So she was off weaving for a larger tailor, who employed more women, in a bigger city. And yet, that bard found her. He looked much more prosperous now. She didn't, she was exhausted and her clothes were dusty from cleaning earlier to find the thread she needed.

This one did not keep the storeroom cleaned and organized at all. They had all complained about that so she had taken it on herself to handle that. The women had thanked her. Her boss had scowled because she wasn't working. So she was not in the best shape when she ran into him. He stared at her oddly. She stared back. "You found me. How?"

"I can track things," he said dryly. He moved closer. "Your aunts send their greetings but are disturbed that your mother hadn't told you."

"Well they both died in a plague." She shrugged. "I guess there were more important things to pass on."

"Perhaps." He stared at her. "Are you innocent of men?"

"That's rude."

"It's important."

"Not your business, kind bard."

"I'm no bard, Darcy."

She stared at him. "I should note I carry a weapon."

"Good. It's often a good idea when men are about." He grinned. "I do not need one used on me however."

"Are you certain? You seem like the sort that would need one used on you."

He smiled. "Very." He stared at her. "You could have dinner with me."

"There's no way. Sorry. I'm exhausted, dirty, and have to work just past dawn tomorrow again." He stared at her. "I do need my job."

"You could go back to a small cottage in the woods."

She shrugged. "I still kill some plants for some reason." She shifted her weight, staring at him. "I do not think it wise to have dinner with you."

"I think you should so we can talk on your mother's people."

"I have her journals."

"That's good. Have you read them?"

"Yes, including the one she wrote specifically for me when the curse would have killed her."

"Yes, that was my mother's doing," he sighed.

She scowled. "Are you claiming mythical status?" she snorted.

"Well, we had to come from somewhere, chit." He smirked. She stared back, arms crossed over her chest. "Please eat with me so we can speak?"

"I think not. You have gotten to the point of weird. I find weird things not very tolerable." She walked off to go to the baths. He took her arm and walked her off in another direction. "Unhand me."

"If you scream, none would help you. You're an unmarried woman." She stabbed him on the side, making him yelp. "Oh, hellcat," he smirked at her. He healed that injury and she stared. "Believe me now?"

"That's not something I can do. If you can I believe there's priests who would like to have words. They keep trying to have them with me," she said dryly. That had shaken her but she was not one to show that.

He moved closer. "Darcy," he said quietly. "Please have dinner with me so we can speak?"

"I am in no shape for dinner, sir."

"I'm Loki."

"Hmm. Interesting name. I've read myths." She walked around him, going back to her rooms. "I'm going to settle in for the night. I have work tomorrow. Perhaps we can catch up some other time."

"Perhaps," he agreed, smirking at her back. "Perhaps in your dreams this time."

She glared back at him. "I do not believe that to be healthy either, sir. Such things are frowned upon and I do have to work tomorrow at just past dawn. Perhaps some other day. Like a holy day." She stomped off shaking her head.

He nodded. There was one of those coming up, one to him anyway. The locals wouldn't recognize it for what it had once celebrated but they had their own version just a few days later to some saint. Yes, he could wait a few days to talk to her.

***

Darcy's only free day that month made her wake up in a dream realm. She looked at herself. She was wearing a scarlet gown with gold embroidery and felt the chains in her hair. She looked up then sighed. "This is not who I am."

"We shall see," Loki said, waving her at the seat at the table he had set up. He smiled. "Shall we eat?"

"Will this keep me well today?"

"Yes. It will transfer over." She sat down and settled in properly, as her mother had taught her. "You should be wearing that necklace in your hair."

"Mother said that was for special occasions like weddings. She taught me how her people dressed when I was eight or so."

He nodded. "That was important so things were not lost." He poured her some white wine, then himself some. "Do eat, Darcy. You're skinny."

"Things are bad right now."

"Yes, they are. You should move from the area before they get worse or a war happens again." He stared at her. "Eat." She dug in delicately. "Eat like normal. I do not care for manners at the moment."

"That would be rude."

"Point." He ate as well, then he sighed and stared at her. "Your father? Was he of your mother's people?"

"I assumed." She stared at him. "Wouldn't he have to be?"

"Many have chosen not to marry someone that...long term."

She grimaced. "I can see that point. Having the same people around you all the time can get frustrating." She ate another bite and chewed then cut another piece of the meat. "This is nice."

"Thank you." He dug in, and when he was done he served her a pudding. She smiled at that and dug in gently. "Do eat. You need the food." She stared at him. "There are things to speak of. The histories. The realities. The future you'll see."

"Or I could mess up and have a child tomorrow."

"It's only a daughter that the curse is on, Darcy." She relaxed and nodded, finishing that bite of pudding. "You take out the women, you take out the whole culture. What you are is passed on from mother to daughters and sons."

"I know how things like that work."

"Hmm, there's more to it than that." He finished up and relaxed again. Two books appeared on the table. She picked them up to look at while she finished her pudding. "In some ways the ones who called you a witch were correct." She stared at him over the edge of the book. He grinned. "That is one reason why you are so lived. The power in your blood does sing quietly to the earth."

"I'd rather not. They rather frown on that."

"Hmm." He nodded. "If you're speaking that way because you fear someone can hear you talking in your sleep, that may be reasonable. Depending on how nosy your neighbors are." She shrugged and got back to reading. She frowned at one thing and glared at him. He shrugged one shoulder, grinning at her. "It was not my doing and not my war."

"Yet your mother?"

"She was mad and prompted into it by her husband."

"Figures. Husbands are an evil that no woman deserves."

"Yet there are benefits."

She snorted. "Not many."

"Hmm. We'll have to see. Perhaps you'll take a temporary one?"

"I do not believe me having a cursed daughter would be good for me."

"There's ways around that."

"Yes but they're foul. A girl child gets born like boy children do."

"Hmm. True. There's ways of telling beforehand though."

"Not completely." She went back to reading, sighing at the end. Then she looked at him. "So why tell me?"

"So you're not bumbling around."

"Was it bothering you?" she asked dryly. She sipped the wine delicately.

"Yes, slightly." He stood up, walking over to take her hand and pull her away from the table. There was a lit area and music coming from somewhere. He stared at her. "Do you dance?"

"Hardly ever. Nothing this fancy."

"It will come to you. As it has all your relatives." He took her hand to hold for now, starting off with a bow. She curtseyed back, looking curious. He pulled her closer, moving slowly around the room with her. She shivered at the feeling. He let her go, holding up a hand about shoulder high. She put hers against his, just the palms touching, as they circled around each other.

Her free hand rested against the curve of her back as his did, and his stare into her eyes was hypnotic. She moved off after a few slow turns, but he caught her hand and pulled her back then moved off again with another bit of regular style waltzing. She closed her eyes and sighed, letting the feelings take her. "As I said, it comes from the mother's lines," he said in her ear. She stared up at him. "This is the traditional courting dance, Darcy. You only do this with an intended."

"Are you putting yourself forward?"

"I am." He smiled. "Because I find you ...interesting." She quirked an eyebrow up. "Not many mortals are."

"Hmm. Perhaps." She moved back, staring at him. "Why tell me these?"

"Just for that reason. There's too few of you to mess up and lose another. Also, I find you interesting. Even exhausted you shone out to me when I was performing, nearly bringing me out of that spell I was casting on the audience. Isn't that enough?"

"In some novels."

"Yes, well, some of us are built like one." He winked and bowed, then blew a kiss, which sent her back to her dream. She moaned and flipped onto her side, making the ones worrying about her run from the room. She had apparently been talking out loud from her dream. Maybe she'd move again. She heard England was pretty country. They had need of weavers there too.

If he followed, she'd talk to him she supposed. It didn't hurt to talk to him. She wouldn't fall down with open thighs like many girls did their husbands but they could talk.

***

It was a decade later when she ran into Loki again, making him smirk as she caught his eye in the market. She huffed but got what she needed and walked over to him. "It took you a decade?"

"Well, yes. I was being bothered." He stared at her. "Are you well?"

"I'm fine."

"Hm." He looked her over. She looked nicer again. She seemed healthy enough. "Have dinner with me?"

"I had plans on cooking tonight for once. I have to make meals for the rest of the week."

"You do work too hard."

"That is not a choice I have."

"I could help you fix that."

"That would be painful when others found out." She walked off. "I'll see you at dinner."

"Fine." He smiled at her back, walking in the opposite direction. A few had noticed and he caught one staring. "I knew her mother." That made them relax. "I have no designs on her house." He went to clean up and make sure he looked impeccable as always. He showed up at her new cottage that night while she was cooking. She wasn't dressed to impress by any means. She was in her shift. He stared at her backside. "Is that what you're wearing to dinner?"

"No," she said without looking at him. "It's what I have to wear right now. The stove's too hot to wear clothes in front of." She looked over her shoulder. "You're early." She put the spoon down and the lid on then went to get dressed. She came out in a dark blue dress, fashionable by the current area, with her hair done up as was proper by what her mother had taught her. He nodded, smiling at her. "So why did you want to speak some more?"

"I do find you interesting," he reminded her. She smiled at that. He moved closer, taking her hand to kiss. "You have quite the ability to change the world, Darcy."

"How would I do that?"

"With sense mostly." He smiled. "What you know, many do not." She nodded she knew that. "It can be beneficial." He let her hand go as he stepped back. "You look tired."

"I've been cooking for the upcoming week."

"That can happen." He let her stir things again then come back to set the table. It was simple fare and simple dishes but it was good food. She had put on quite the spread for their dinner. "Have you read more on your ancestors?"

"I've seen a few mentions but women wanting to look at books is highly wrong to some people. Including some church people who seem to hoard books."

"Hmm. As it will be for years. You will be frustrated at that for years, Darcy." She nodded she realized that. They settled in to eat and stare at each other. At the end, he got up and held out a hand. She looked confused. "Continue our dance?"

"Are we heathens to dance under the moon light?"

"Yes, we are." He smiled. "We invented it." She snorted but took his hand so he could pull her up and move her to a clear area of the floor to resume that same dance. When she turned away this time, his free hand caught hers to pull her back against him. She moaned. "There are ways around the curse," he said in her ear. "Spells to make sure only sons come to be."

"Are you supposing?"

"No, I know for certain." He smiled at her, pulling her back to that dance. She could feel the energy coming at their call. "This is your gift." She shivered. "Train it well." He touched her cheek, staring at her again. "You are most special. One of the youngest left. There's only five females and seven males of your people." She shuddered. "I can help you with that."

"I...an unmarried woman having a child is foul to the locals." She waved a hand around. "This is rented from the mill as my last one was."

He nodded. "We can arrange that, chit." He kissed her knuckles, making her shiver. He stepped back. "Prepare for it next time I appear?"

"Another decade?" she joked.

"Yes, perhaps." He smiled. "You'd have to move anyway."

She sighed. "Good point."

"Hm." He winked. "Study hard, find yourself, and when I return we'll dance again." He bowed and disappeared.

"That's cryptic," she complained. She took her hair down and moved to clean up the mess from dinner. Not like a man would ever help such things. They only made the messes, not helped clean them up. She made sure the chains and her mother's things were safely stored again, back in the pantry area for safekeeping. Buried in the cold cellar so no nosy person would find it. Because there were nosy people and she knew the mill paid a fee if someone told them one of their workers was a problem sort.

Which she apparently was now. She sighed and got back to cleaning up.

She definitely had to take up herbcraft and become the witch they had called her all those years ago.

***

2010ish:

***

Darcy looked out as the agents showed up. This was bad. She had to act to save herself and others. She had learned how to be careful but today...no. She huffed off outside and made the spell happen. All their stuff ...well, it was three days earlier. She stared at Jane, who just poured herself some coffee while staring back. "So."

"So," she agreed with a smirk. "What the hell was that, Darcy?"

She pointed. "Agents are coming in three days to steal all of our stuff, Jane. My mother's memento box, all your stuff, everything."

"Let's back it up and do things then," she decided. "Then you can explain how you did that."

"That's a lot longer of an explanation." She shrugged but grinned. "But Thor's a problem."

"Huge problem?"

"Yeah. They're coming because of him." Jane winced. "And he is who he says he is." She winced but nodded once. "And it'll be bad. I'm pretty sure it'll be bad," she finished quietly. "Which is why I did that."

"How far?"

"Three days."

"Okay." They got things packed up and moved. All but the most basic things and one of Darcy's fancier hair things she had created. It had her mother's medallion on it, but it was a thinner chain she had clipped into her hair. Now the medallion was pulling back on a side and she had someone make her special earrings to match it. And when her son got there, she was going to beat his ass to death.

Their stuff was safely, quietly stored somewhere no agent was going to find it. If they did, they'd find the fake shipping crates. Jane's work was buried in a safe. Her things were buried in a different safe.

So when the agents showed up, she got into their faces about her iPod, and made the agents very confused at just having a few machines, some clothes, and a few handwritten notes that held incorrect things. One tried to get her jewelry. "You're not taking my mother's jewelry. It's not electronic, dude." She snatched it back and put her hair back up again. "And if you try it again you can bite my ass."

"I can have you arrested," he offered.

She smirked. "Can you? For fighting off people stealing our shit? Really?" He smirked and nodded, trying for it again. So she made him gasp and die of the heart attack. "Interesting. Guys, he seems to be having heart problems?" She pointed and got out of the way. "Maybe the old witch at the diner poisoned him. She should've."

She walked over to Jane, who held her back so Jane could go punch the agent in charge. Darcy spotted her son, making him blanch and walk off. "Hmm. Gotta handle that." Another agent tried to get her hair thing and she zapped him, making him shriek. "It's silver, not electrical, and I'll have you killed. Are we clear? It's one of the last things I have of my mother." The agent backed off looking scared.

"There's no reason to steal their personal effects that don't hold electronics," the agent in charge said as he walked in.

"Theft is always wrong, SHIELD guy," Darcy shot back. "That makes you the evil shits of the universe and I pray like hell that you get what's coming to you." She smirked at him. "Everything that's coming to you." The spell hit and he flinched, staring at her. She stared back. Jane distracted him by getting into his face to shout. The agents saved their head guy but took things anyway. Darcy stared at one agent, who winced. "I gotta beat that kid," she muttered.

"You knew that one?" Jane demanded with a point.

"Yeah, that's my son. I'm going to beat his ass to death." She looked at Jane.

"You're not that old."

"Bullshit." She smirked,. "I'm a bit older than I look, Jane."

"Are you like Thor?"

"No. And their devices don't work." She straightened up, staring at her. "It's hereditary." She shrugged. "Until I have a daughter." She walked around her. "Let's move?"

"Let's move," she decided, going with Darcy. They could camp in the desert with Thor. Thor was giving Darcy's hair ornament an odd look. "What?" Jane demanded. "Do you recognize it?"

"Aye. But their people died."

"Yes, my mother had a daughter, Thor." She stared at him. "Your mother considered that foul," she said in her original language. He shivered at that. "And I do protect Jane. Are we clear?"

"Yes," he agreed, nodding. "Are you aware...."

"Yeah. I've read." He slumped but nodded. She saw the agents coming their way. "Incoming." She stared at her son, making him wince again. "So, the boy I saw grow up, did his mother raise him to be this thug?" she demanded coldly. "Because I'm pretty sure when your mom hears she's gonna be capital letters pissed off. And knowing your mother, she's going to have a 'I brought you into this world I'm taking you out of it' sort of talk." She stared at him. "Knowing your mom, it'll have a baseball bat too."

"I... Miss Lewis...." She glared. He backed up. "It is not my duty to question...." Darcy hauled off and hit him, making him whine. "Ow!"

"Good! I'm telling your goddamn father too the next time I see him!" He winced and backed away from her. "Wait until they hear about this shit!" She put her hands on her hips. The other agent tried to get in her way so she shoved him, knocking him into the fire. "Awww. Poor baby man. Did you wear polyester?" she quipped when he had to roll around in the dirt to put himself out. She stared at her son, one foot starting to tap. He backed away slowly, grabbing the other agent to flee for his life. "Oh, we'll make sure to talk to your parents, Jacob! God damn little fucking moron!"

"Sorry!"

"You're gonna be!" She huffed. Thor was looking amused. She glared at him. "Not one word."

"Not one," he agreed. "Though I would hide that better, Darcy."

"It's fine." She looked at the fire, kicking the spilled wood back into it. The agents didn't try to come back again. So when Thor's friends showed up, that was amusing. Slightly. And then her boyfriend/long time lover/whatever the fuck they were to each other showed up with his metallic robot, she was still not amused. Jacob was amused. But the robot kicked him and sent him flying too.

"Woohoo, three point shot," she called. She glared at the robot from her safe spot. The robot stared at her then went after Thor. Yup, another baseball style talk needed to happen. Fuck it, she should remember she had ancient skills and just take out all of Asgard's ruling family. She could find another boyfriend. Jacob limped back looking miserable. But he had made that very bad choice to work with SHIELD.

When Thor and Loki fought on the bridge, she pulled him to her and glared. Loki landed next to her on the roof. "I should kick your ass like you kicked your son's ass," she said, sipping from the tequila bottle. She stared at him. "Really I should." He winced as he sat up. "Of course, I could've let you continue to fall. All the way to Thanos."

"What?" he demanded, standing up. She stared at him. "I...."

"Yeah!" She nodded. "You taught me how to tell the future in the late 1800's. Or don't you remember? I know it's been a while." She took another sip.

"You're peeved," he said, straightening himself out. "It's reasonable." She glared again. "Is he around here?"

"Somewhere. The agents are still infecting the town."

"That could be dangerous for you."

She snorted. "I'm going to have to switch soon anyway." She handed him the bottle. "Dumbass. Suicidal dumbass I might add." She stood up to get into his face. He backed down. She was shorter than him but he knew her temper. He had seen it a few times over the last few centuries. The civil war in the US had not been pretty when she had worked against the evils of slavery. Her temper had destroyed a few cities. They credited the union army for it though. He sipped from the bottle. "I will not allow this to continue on that path."

"If it's destiny...."

She put her hands on her hips. "Really?"

"I..." He sighed. "Show me?"

"Look for yourself." He cast the spell and shuddered at what he saw, staring at her. She nodded. "Now, shoo, before you draw more attention?" She smirked as she walked off.

He erased that from the agents watching and disappeared in a swirl of magic to go hide in his usual midgardian residence. His son and he would talk soon he was sure.

Darcy went into hiding that same night, bringing Jane with her. SHIELD was an international agency but there were a lot more interesting people than they were out there.

***

Jacob watched his parents fight and felt a pit of dread as he saw the foretelling spell go off. Oh, his mom was pissed. Drunk and pissed and had seen something bad. He had really stepped in it and really had to fake his own death to get away from SHIELD. Before she busted his identity this time. Thankfully the sons of her people only lived a few hundred years so he only had a few more lives to go to hide from his mother's wrath. He was doomed.

As he faked his death, he sent a coded message to a few emails. His four other brothers would be disappointed in him but Mom would probably love to see them soon to ease her temper against him.

This might be worse than the temper from one of the boys scaring a cow that kicked over a lantern and started a fire.

***

Darcy looked up from buying groceries in London a few months later, smiling at Loki since he was standing there in a shadow. "We seem to keep meeting like this," she joked.

"It's safer," he admitted quietly. "May we speak?"

"Of course. That's all you're getting though. Even if you do make dinner."

He gave out a weak smile. "Perhaps." He let her bring her groceries back to Jane's mother's flat then took her to his temporary apartment. He did make dinner and settled across from her. "You stopped the timeline's destruction."

"Of course I did. Be damned if I want that purple fucker to snap." She twirled the pasta, moaning as she ate a bite. "You did an excellent job. You really did learn well from that little old widow in Florence."

"I did." He smiled, digging in. "They'll be after you for Jacob leaving."

"They'll be after Jacob for leaving and he's not visible. SHIELD is international but not that good. There's plenty of places left to hide. Jane and I are heading to some of them soon probably." He nodded, digging in. "Are you mad I did it?"

"No." He stared at her. "I'm thankful you did."

She patted his hand. "You're depressed."

"I found out things."

"I knew that. You're chilly all night. Thor was a furnace."

He rolled his eyes but ate more food, shaking his head. "That is weird."

"Very. But there's the convergence in a few years."

"Shite."

"Yup. And hey, this way you won't have to invade anywhere."

"I still have a purpose."

"So take over a small country and work your way up as someone people want to rule them. Fear is never the answer. It makes for weak kings."

He stared at her. "You seriously think I'd be that weak?" he demanded impatiently.

"No, but I think you'd be that cruel and therefore cause a civil war and then lots of lives lost." She stared as she ate another bite. "Which won't benefit you or anyone else. So become the world leader others want to become so you gather strength and allies then use them. Some day, we'll need to band together to fight off aliens."

"Hmm." He dug in again, considering that. "You did always see faster and further than I did."

"Women's gifts I guess," she said dryly. She dug in again. "This is really good. I've been taking care of Jane." She shook her head but dug in again.

"I noticed the weight loss, Darcy."

She shrugged. "It happens at times. Not as bad as the influenza."

"True." He took her hand to squeeze. "Thank you."

"Not a problem." She smirked. "Also, it's been thirty years, Loki."

"I know." He sighed. "I was tied by Odin's decrees."

"Yeah, about that." She smirked. "Can my last degree help with that?"

"Do not tempt me, Darcy. That's cruel and mean and you'd hate to see that happen." He stared at her. She stared back. "It would be too broad."

"Pity. Though I like Thor. He seems decent."

"Seems." He stuffed his mouth again. She sighed, getting up to hug him. He relaxed against her chest, letting her comfort him. "I...."

"Shh. Things suck and we'll handle it. Then things will suck less." He nodded against her shoulder. "Good boy. Now eat." She sat down again to eat. "What're we going to do if they have us bugged?"

"Crash their people?" he guessed.

"Hmm. Not that hard." She smirked. "They've got a lot of secrets." He shivered with a moan. "Even worse than the Church used to have." She dug in and smiled at him when he handed her extra. "Thank thee."

"Welcome." He got his own seconds and they finished up. The threat to collapse SHIELD was not empty, and the listening agents would know that. So many were dirty there that they'd realize it. Or their higher ups would. It was not worth that to them. That night, Loki disappeared to remake himself as a world leader. Darcy did have great ideas.

Darcy went back to Jane's side. Jane hadn't forgotten but she didn't ask either. She decided she did not want to know. Science didn't need *all* the answers of the universe. Yet.

***

One of the agents cornered Darcy out and about to run errands a few days later, smirking at her. "Are you of the Clan Macleod?"

"That show was campy and fun but Methos was the real hotty and a really good role model," she quipped back. "But I've never been Scottish. Sorry." She got around him.

He pulled her back to talk to her. "Whatever you did to that boy...."

"He deserved. He knew not to become part of the problem."

"And now?"

"I have no idea."

"He died."

"Uh-huh."

"No, I mean really died. He had a car crash. They found the body."

She grimaced, then patted him on the cheek. She'd know if her son was truly dead so it was good he had managed to hide himself so well. "Then his father probably got him." She got free, staring at him. "Anything else?"

"How do you know about HYDRA?"

"Because I saw them the first time and fought back." She smirked. "And if they come for Jane again, we'll repeat the base camp in Sicily incident." He shuddered. "Exactly. Now. Anything else?"

"Are you truly immortal?"

"I nearly died of the flu in the 1920 version. What do you think?"

"I think my bosses would probably like to find out." He smiled.

"They tried that before. Which is what happened in Sicily and a few other places they tried." She stared at him. He backed away slowly. She smiled. "Good choice." She winked. "So let me go do my mommy duty. I know very well Jacob wasn't HYDRA. So don't try that either." He shuddered but nodded. "Good. We done?"

"I suppose."

"Then have a good flight back to wherever, dude. Bee Tee Dubs, leave Jacob alone. His brothers are not as nice as his parents." She smiled as she walked around him.

He shuddered but did report that to his HYDRA bosses. They remembered that base in Sicily and why it had went down. They had wanted that power but not enough to risk their whole organization coming out. Because Darcy Lewis was not the average person with powers. She had skills too.

They felt really sorry for that son who had disappointed her. They felt that all the way up until their base blew up thanks to Jacob and a few of his brothers. Only one agent survived and he saw Jacob but passed out a minute later. This was not going to be good for HYDRA. When the first responders found him in the wreckage, he blinked at them. "Get me SHIELD," he moaned. "SHIELD has to know."

They nodded and let him have his delusions. Though one did make a note about what he had said. That would bring an agent. A non-conscripted one.

It brought Maria Hill. She was not pleased at that mess. Or why it was a mess. Though she didn't hear exactly why. Just that her newly 'dead' agent had done it thanks to that one surviving agent. Who had admitted it was a HYDRA base before he died.

How sweet.

***

A redheaded woman stopped Jacob when he was upping his motel room for the next week, staring at him. "You were good, but not good enough."

"I'm disappearing in two days, Romanoff." He stared at her. "I'm not going to go anywhere near SHIELD."

"Or HYDRA?"

"No, I blew them the fuck up. My parents are already disappointed in me and I don't want to add to it by letting those scum survive."

She tipped her head. "That one assistant knew your mother. The agent reports said so."

He nodded. "And she's going to kill me if she can find me. So I'm hiding from all of you."

"Good idea." She stepped back. "Why were they HYDRA?"

"Because they've had a few agents leftover."

"Excuse me?"

He nodded. "Hill is going to have a fit. HYDRA has us core rotted. Has everyone core rotted." He stared at her. "Good luck. I'll be in the middle of nowhere."

"Those ones with you?"

"I wouldn't even wonder because that sort of attention is bad for you, Romanoff. They helped me because my cover got blown thanks to Lewis."

She smirked. "Is she related?"

"No comment. Ever. Because you don't step up to Lewis and not get eaten." He stared at her. "Just don't. Don't let SHIELD. Don't let HYDRA, though they won't. She's destroyed a base of theirs herself."

"When?"

"No comment." He grinned. "About anything else." He tipped his head with a smirk. "Have fun and forget you ever heard of us. Darcy's a nice, normal young woman with some strong contacts. Just...leave the family and Lewis outside of all of it. Don't even wonder. It draws attention."

"To me?"

"And to them. And it'll end up bad. That's the last warning, dear." He walked off. "Have fun."

"You as well. Good luck." She went to report that to Hill, who was not amused. Darcy had a good background, it was in all the right places. So perhaps she was just a meddling, connected spot in all this. She hoped. She seemed so normal and a bit weird.

***

"I need to open someone's ass and insert my foot," Darcy complained as she looked things over. "A few times."

Jane looked at her. "Why?"

"They're trying to get your grant canceled."

"Who?"

"SHIELD. It's an attempt to make you work for them." She handed over the semi-threatening letter. "I hope they all get eaten."

Jane grimaced, going to chew on the person who had written that letter. They had asked for a phone call. It wasn't going to be a pleasant one.

Darcy grinned, getting back to the mail. She checked her own bank account, moving something from her savings to her checking. It was running a bit low again. Jane hung up with a huff and went up to sit on the roof for a bit to vent. Maybe Thor would hear and show up. Or maybe not because it'd be a while. Darcy found a historical mention of the convergence and put it on Jane's desk so she'd find it someday soon. That would give her something new to think about. They had to make some plans.

Jane would want to be less than scruffy when her boyfriend reappeared after two years.

***

Maria Hill looked at the film oddly. It had clearly been tampered with by someone. Someone she was not sure of. "How much tampering?"

"None, ma'am," the lower level SHIELD agent said quietly. "It was a tester from that new drone system." She winced. "It clearly caught something in New Mexico that may have compromised everyone."

She looked at him. "It probably caught someone doing an energy study or something."

"Is that why suddenly there's nothing in there when there had been?" He rewound it. The drone showed the sudden sparkling then a change of circumstances for the ones under watch.

Hill frowned. "Get me someone who was there."

"They're on their way up, ma'am. I reported this to Coulson first and he was not pleased."

"Is that because it shows Foster punched him?" she asked dryly.

"Not really," Phil Coulson said as he came in to view the footage. "I have no idea but if I was into fantasy novels I'd suspect magic."

She looked at him. "We've seen weirder, Phil."

"I know. But Foster isn't the sort. Lewis...." He tipped his head the other way. "That one agent did flee for his life then fake his own death."

"If my mother was going to rip me apart, I would too, sirs," the lower agent said. "My mother would beat me to death then cry that she had to when someone caught her. Because she hadn't raised me that way and it was her duty to save people from me." Coulson stared at him. He shrugged but nodded. "She would. Family takes care of its own rabid members."

"Mine would've given me that disappointed look and sighed then nagged me into giving in," he said.

"My mother never hurt me," Hill admitted. "But I knew when she was mad and I fled for my life sometimes." She considered it. "Any idea where he went?"

"Last spotted in Poland, heading towards Transylvania."

"Do we think he's going there because he's a vampire?" the lower agent joked.

"We've seen weirder than vampires too," Hill said. "Though I doubt he was part of the tribe that was originally formed around a tortured prince who put poles up the backside of his subjects that annoyed him, who a writer turned into a mythical creature. We had him in daylight plenty and medical didn't note anything irregular about his diet or physical."

"Maybe not that tribe but another one?" Coulson guessed. "Some of the Rom maybe?"

"Maybe. What about a few nights later?" That film was cued up. "Who is that?" She pointed at the guy who had fallen on the roof.

"I do not know," Phil Coulson said. "We're doing a computer scan to see if we can identify him but he clearly appeared. Then disappeared." He frowned. "And he knew Lewis."

"Maybe he's like that one agent?" the lower level one suggested. "He mentioned having brothers."

Hill blinked a few times. "If so, that may explain some things. But Lewis? Is she the center of that?"

"I don't know," Coulson said. "We can't keep surveillance on her. It keeps dying quickly. Foster hates us as well and will never work with us unless it'll save the world." Hill winced at that. "I was overzealous," he admitted. Then he crossed his arms over his chest. "But I had such a bad feeling."

"I still do," the lower agent said. "And it's weird that it's all around Lewis but she doesn't seem to be doing any of it."

"Romanoff's report said that she was full of contacts to that agent's family," Hill said, considering it. "Could we get Lewis as an agent? Just in case?"

"With what they think about SHIELD? We may be destroyed," Phil joked. "She did curse us to get what was coming to us."

"I'm wondering if that's why HYDRA had a base destroyed," the lower agent said quietly. They stared at him. He shrugged. "Seems like convenient timing, sirs."

The two senior agents shared a look and Hill got to work looking up HYDRA files in their system while locking down any surveillance gear in their area. What she was starting to see did not amuse her any. "Lock us down," she said quietly. "Completely." She stared at the junior agent. "You do not move, do not call anyone, anything." He nodded, surrendering his phone. Coulson was calling for a decontamination alarm to go off. That would lock down the higher level buildings and their full building. They'd lose a couple of minor bases possibly but not the main building.

Clint Barton leaned in with a smirk. "We had a gas of unknown origins planted on the helicarrier's systems as of last night and Natasha reporting it to us, Hill. Is it about that?"

It was good Phil's agents thought well on their feet. He clearly knew something was going on. "We've had the same thing here. We're in full lockdown, Hawkeye. No communication just in case."

"Yes, ma'am." He went to make that order to the trainees he hated to deal with.

Hill considered it then looked at the junior agent. "Name three upper level agents you feel weird about. Some sort of bad feeling, creepy feeling, whatever."

"Carter, Garrett, Ward, and probably Hand."

"Carter?" she demanded.

"She's a bit too perfect, sir. A bit too nepotism got her the job and she's too...perky, perfect, seems like an act to me. Hand is a power hungry woman, has been as long as I've been SHIELD for the last two years. Garrett and Ward both give me weird, slimy guy feelings like the ones that keep trying to pick up girls who continually turn them down in the bars."

"Huh," Phil said. "I trained with Garrett and he does have that and the thread of danger underneath that." He nodded. "Any others that prick you that way?"

"Sometimes Fury himself does. A lot of the World Security Council people do but that could be that they're politicians. Or they're part of the same fraternity as they get together outside the office once a year to have dinner near a college in England."

"Name one you absolutely trust," Hill ordered.

"Romanoff. If she's evil we'll never find out. And she'd take out Barton if he was."

Phil nodded. "True. Any others you implicitly trust?"

He looked at him. "Outside you and Mack?"

"Mack. Yes, he's a good one to find this," he decided, looking at Hill, who nodded and had him summoned. "Lewis did curse us to get what was coming to us for being the evil dicks of the intelligence community," he joked.

"I need to make sure I don't run into her," Hill decided. "Just in case. Do we have any other correlations to the guy on the roof?"

"He was in Thor's hospital room," Phil said quietly. "Hospital cameras caught him but not a good image. It was always blurry."

"So magic again?" she asked.

He nodded. "We think so. It's rather creepy of him." Someone came rushing in and he stopped them. "What are you doing?"

"Sir, we're under lockdown and WSC member Pierce said to get Agent Hill to his office to answer why."

"Because we've had gas canisters of unknown origin on the helicarrier and here," she noted. "And I'm busy. He can talk to Fury. I don't talk to the WSC unless I have to. That's his job."

"Yes, ma'am." He went to report that up to his bosses. HYDRA was not amused but they were paranoid for a good reason. Hopefully not about this time though.

***

Darcy kicked back, watching the news. "Hey, Jane?" She hummed. "SHIELD is imploding." Jane looked over then came over to watch. The lockdown was being covered by the news. And the fact that one reporter had heard gunshots while filming by the doors of their local office. Jane settled next to her to watch it with her. Yes, they certainly got what was coming to them.

Darcy did hate HYDRA more than most things. And all other Nazis too. It was an amusing afternoon that ended up with reports of a lot of fighting, a lot of arrests, some dead agents, and the SHIELD offices being shut temporarily due to HYDRA invasion. So yeah, very interesting. Darcy got up to make more coffee and brought it back for the both of them. It was going to be a long night watching that evil fall.

***

A few days later, Nick Fury tried to get in to where Hill and Coulson were locked in. "Let me the fuck in, Hill!" he ordered.

"Not yet, Sir."

"Nick, calm down," Phil called back. "Just go sit down in view."

"Right the hell now!" he shouted.

"You could try the knob," Melinda May said as she walked behind him. "I'm to debrief you about what you know about HYDRA, Fury." He glared at her but she just stared back. "Right now. Please."

"Why?"

"Because we had to take down all but one of the WSC officers," she said with a smile. "And you're next." He glared. She walked him off to debrief him. He wasn't HYDRA, and she probably knew that, but he did know some things he hadn't realized. When she showed him the correlations she had done with Mack, he threw a loud fit and broke an office window throwing something at it. Though it was nice it removed the bugs by being flung a few stories down to the pavement. "Are you done?" she asked.

He glared at her. "How bad?"

"Two percent non-confirmed. We have an office's worth of people left that we know are not touched. We can about fill the HUB's staffing with the unsure category. The rest are gone."

He blinked. "That's over two-thirds of us, May."

"I know that." She stared at him. "It's why I haven't slept in two days." She walked off to get back to work. This was really bad. Really, really bad. Right now, she just wanted to survive this and then get some sleep. She'd have to settle for strong coffee.

Thankfully the lockdown had locked all staff in offices to that office and all hallways had been cleared by the alarm going off. It had blocked all incoming and outgoing cellphone and data signals as well. It let them clear one group at a time. Mostly all dirty. And a few times they had taken themselves out. Some agents had heard one being HYDRA and shot up the whole room of agents for them.

Victoria Hand had tried that until two HYDRA people had gotten her before she got them.

***

Darcy stared at the man strolling up to her while she was running errands, lifting her cheek for his usual kiss to it. "Darling," he said quietly. "You should not be in town."

"I should be in town. Jane's here." She smiled. "And you need to evac next summer at a specific date as well."

He raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Really. Huge thing coming." She walked off, arm through his. "How is my most normal grandson?"

He smirked. "Am I really?"

"Yes you really are."

"I thought I was the only grandson."

"Not quite. Peter has one. He's twenty-three doing abstract and splotch art."

"Hmm. That's weird." He smiled down at her. "Are you sure?" She let him see the information she had on the convergence. "Oh, well, yes, I don't want to be here then. I have hints that Grandfather is local?"

"Somewhere down here." She shrugged, looking up at him. "We met his brother. He seemed okay enough, but a bit of a frat boy. He got banished from home for a bit." He winced but nodded once. "Which meant we ran into Jacob and SHIELD."

"Oh, dear."

"Oh, yes. He's somewhere by the former family farm I guess. He's hiding." She smiled. "Before I kicked his ass."

"You probably should for that." He patted her hand on his arm. "Anything exciting?"

"No," she sighed. "I haven't had excitement in years. I had dinner with your grandfather but it's been decades there." She waved a hand around then smiled at the man who appeared on their other side. She looked up at her grandson, who was rolling his eyes. "At least you managed to let him survive this long."

"True. This is my grandmother."

The other spy looked amused then at him. "Is that why you haven't aged much?"

"Yes."

"Interesting."

Darcy winked at him. "Don't worry. I hardly ever see this one." She looked up at him. "I need introduced to some fun people."

"I would but they'd probably try to make you work for them, dear."

"Point. Pity but point. Anyway, Jane's working hard on her bridge and stuff. I'm making sure she survives it."

He sighed, shaking his head. "And you yell at us about not using our degrees?"

"I use mine. Sometimes. Especially my poli-sci one I'm presently in the middle of. Negotiations are a thing I do."

He snorted but looked amused. "Fine. You will be safe?"

"I do try. But Thor got us on the radar of SHIELD."

"Which imploded."

"Yes, they had HYDRA, dear."

"Oh, no."

"Oh, yes." She smirked. He winced. "Yeah. Which is why others are having problems I'm assuming." He nodded. She went onto tiptoes to kiss his cheek. "Let me go bother Jane into eating. She's forgotten all day again. Come for dinner sometime, dears. Confuse Jane a lot." She strolled off.

He looked at his partner then after her. "I really do love that woman but sometimes she's very chaotic." His partner just nodded. He'd met her once without knowing why. That explained something he had missed back then. The grandson rolled his eyes. "She's very unique." He walked in the other direction, taking his partner with him. "You may not mention her. We protect her and her gift," he said quietly but firmly. "Or else I will have to take you out." He gave him a pointed look.

"I would not. I have seen how agencies would want someone with any sort of skills."

"Thank you." They went back to the office to report. "HYDRA was why SHIELD imploded. And other agencies probably falling as well." Their senior agent blinked a few times. "I talked with a friend of the family. She had a friend's son in SHIELD."

"Oh. Charming. HYDRA? After all these years?"

"Apparently they've been underground."

"Yes, let's stop that. Make sure of our people," he ordered. "I doubt we want such snakes in our grasses." He stared at him. "Did you go for that plastic surgery treatment again?"

"Of course. I can't pick up marks if I'm not pretty." He walked off to handle that. His partner was still confused but he'd explain it when they were private later.

Their supervising agent shook his head with a sigh. "I'd ask how he does it but I do not want to know. I might have to go there."

***
Part 2 by Voracity2
Jane finally managed to come out of Science to find Darcy knitting on the couch. She stared at her. "How long have you been able to knit?"

"Seventeen-forty-two. A little old lady in upper Italy taught me." She grinned at her.

"Uh-huh. So the kids?"

"Five sons."

"No daughters?"

"Family curse on daughters, Jane." She stared at her. "Thanks to Frigga actually."

"Shit." Jane pouted. "Thor said she was nice."

"She probably is to most everyone."

"Hmm. That's nice. So you're not Asgardian?"

"Nope."

"But how?" She waved a hand.

"It's hereditary. I have no idea where my people came from. Mom didn't share that part. The books had a few different versions on that point." She stared at her. "I hadn't met Thor before this." Jane nodded, relaxing again. "I've met his brother a few times."

"We have?"

"I have."

"Like....often?"

"About every decade for the longest time until about the seventies. Then it'd been three decades."

"Huh." She nodded. "Okay then." She cleared her throat. "Five sons?"

"Yeah. Birth control has been around since the Egyptians were using croc dung and rocks as IUD's, Jane." She smiled. "There's some other helpful things too. Including making sure there's no daughters."

"Like ever?"

"If I do have one, I'll die when she's fifteen." She looked at her. "That's the curse they laid on my people."

"But you age."

"Slowly but yes."

"You joked you get more done in one of your years than most people do a decade."

"Just about." She smiled. "Kind of."

"Oh. Okay." She nodded. "So you saw a lot of history."

"I did."

"Did you do anything in the books?"

"I had a temper during the civil war and took out a few southern towns."

"Huh." She nodded at that. "I would've too I guess. Do you like Thor?"

"At the moment, it's not a bad thing. If it becomes a bad thing, I'll show you how to fake grieve at a funeral." She stared at her.

"I know most women weren't academics."

"No, but my mother had taught me how to read. The villagers where I grew up called me a witch a lot because I survived the plague that got my parents. Thankfully no one wanted our little farm so I was mostly left alone until I was a full grown woman and then a priest decided I had to be a witch because I didn't want to submit to a husband." She shrugged. "Mostly after that I had a lot of weaving jobs."

"Weaving?"

"An important skill and one that women could work at and not be talked about. It let us have a lot of independence. Also let us earn our own salary. I can't sew worth a damn, to this day, but I was an excellent weaver."

"Huh. I didn't think about that." Darcy grinned again. "And the sons would be able to hold money for you since women couldn't really earn or own things." Darcy nodded. "Very interesting. Huh." She nodded, getting back to science.

"Go shower, Jane. Please?"

"Fine." She went to do that and change clothes. She realized she did stink a bit on the sweaty parts.

Darcy shook her head but got back to making herself a new hat. Sometimes she wondered why she was drawn to brilliant, slightly weird people like Jane and Loki. Then she realized if she knew she might end it by accident and she'd be truly bored then.

***

Loki looked at his people from his newly elected spot. It wasn't a lot. It'd grow from here however. He could definitely grow from here. He'd prove himself worthy and wanted, an inspiration to many. Though he may have to finally getting around to marrying because his people seemed to like that ideal. Which was rather weird to him but he'd handle that he supposed. He did have a few pretty maidens at hand.

Of course he looked up and saw a sight he didn't want to see. His youngest son. Oh, dear. This may be bad. He smiled as he walked over to him. "Cousin."

"Do not," he warned with a smile. "I'll tell Mom on you." He patted him on the cheek. "Let me move again though." He walked off muttering on his way to pack and find a better, easier place to live. Before the city turned on the new mayor and him because of it. That was something he didn't need in his life. He did send out a message where his father was for the others to track him. Or tell Mom. She might be amused. She certainly needed it these days.

"I'll catch up with my cousin later," he announced, making people happy that it had been a relative and not a boyfriend.

***

Darcy looked at the message she got and sighed. "Yeah, sure." She answered and put her phone back down to go back to doing Jane's paperwork. Again. It seemed never-ending sometimes.

"Do you ever just want to run away?" Jane asked suddenly.

"Yes, very frequently when I have to fill out this same form nine times before they accept it." Jane looked at her. So she waved the last copy. Which she was repeating, the same as she had the others and they kept finding a different thing wrong each time. "Why? Is it tequila time?"

"Yes it is." They headed out together, going to the nearest college bar. They always had nice drink specials and as usual Jane was partially broke. Not like they were the sort of women that men bought drinks for. Jane and she settled at a back table with the bottle and two glasses. "Are you two exclusive? Like together?"

"No." She shook her head with a smile. "I've had other lovers. He's had a ton of them."

"Huh. That blows."

"Yeah but I'd get bored with him too, Jane. Especially since I only saw him every decade or so."

"Point. I didn't think about that." She sipped her first drink. Darcy got her own and sipped it too. They could watch the kids play around for tonight. There weren't a lot of students in there but there were enough to be amusing while giving them covering noise for any discussions. "Do the boys do the same sort of aging thing?"

"Bit faster and they don't have the curse so they just last longer. My oldest is nearly two hundred." She stared at her. "Otherwise...." She shrugged and took another drink. "Same old same old."

"Huh." She nodded. "I haven't dated one, right?"

"No, dear."

"Thank god. That'd be creepy." She got another drink to sip. "Oh, that poor guy," she said with a point. "The girl just dropped him harshly."

"Sometimes girls do that," Darcy agreed. They looked at the nerdy guy, who was now pouting while the girl cackled with her friends. Jane got up to go talk to the poor kid. He was clearly a student, and clearly mostly broke, but that happened. Jane talking to him make him liven up and babble about his own ideas. Apparently he was in physics. Darcy rolled her eyes but Jane had a soft spot for other geeks. She brought him back to their table. "Hi. I'm Darcy, Jane's assistant and unpaid intern."

"Ian," he said, shaking her hand with a smile. "Are you an abd too?"

"No. I'm in poli-sci, not physics science." She smiled. "Sit. Go ahead, let Jane babble at you. She'll start that about drink four." Ian settled in with them to talk science with Jane. They were engrossed and inhaling a lot of the bottle. Darcy got another drink but they had the rest. Which figured. Darcy went to pick songs on the player in the corner, nodding at her selections.

Someone complained so she glared at her. "Yes, I'm a master's candidate, dear." The woman piped down because that was a higher rank than an undergrad like her little self. So Darcy picked something jazzy but classical and went back to the pool table. She could definitely shark there and maybe she'd take someone home. She didn't mind some young thing. The contraceptive spells worked on everyone who had balls.

***

Loki looked at his son that night, staring at him really as he packed. "You don't have to move. We could catch up."

"Everything you've touched down here breaks somehow and then it turns on the others around you instead of on you." He stared at him. "That's how Mom lost one of us. Though that had been a daughter and the spell failed to identify it." Loki winced. "She might've been happy then too. Who knows. Mom doesn't talk about that stuff." He went back to packing. "I can visit but I can't stay. I don't want the villagers to show up like I'm the evil scientist when you piss them off."

"I don't plan on it."

"You never do but mischief isn't a great foundation for serious things." He stopped packing to look at him. "Beyond that, I'm still really upset about how you treat Mom. You show up, get some, then disappear for a decade? Is that any way to treat a lover? Did you expect her to wait on you?"

"Of course not and I've never said we were exclusively together. Nor has she asked."

"Uh-huh. Do women have to ask?"

"Have you had a wife?" Loki demanded.

"Two now. Thanks." He stared at him. "And I really could've used your help with the one that had the accident and left me with a son." Loki winced, looking down. "But yet again, you ignored all that. Even when Mom got so damn sick and nearly died from it, nothing from you until you showed up for some nookie. Is that the example you want to set for any of us who have kids?"

"I have grandchildren?" he demanded.

"Um, yeah. At least two that I know of. Jacob's last wife had a daughter but they disappeared one night. I always thought it was to protect them but no idea."

"He's running for his life from your mother."

"I heard why." He stared at him. "You attacked your brother?"

"He deserved it!"

"Uh-huh. Nearly got Mom killed. Yeah." He stared at him. "Most sons are fiercely protective over their mothers. Aren't you?"

"I...mostly am," he admitted then sighed, looking up. He looked at him. "I did want to catch up."

"Then we can chat while I pack."

"I wish you wouldn't."

"I wish it wasn't necessary but it will be. The same as it was in Geneva."

"Fine." He sat down with a sigh to talk to his son like normal people did. "Did your mother expect exclusivity?"

"I'm pretty sure she expected something considering when she was brought up." He stared at him. "There's been a lot of times you didn't see us struggling," he said quietly. "Living on Mom's tiny pay." Loki grimaced but nodded. "Not like she could sell the family heirlooms."

"No, she shouldn't and she may have to hide them more often."

"I doubt that'll happen."

"Me as well." He looked at him. "If your mother had wanted that I may have been willing."

"For a once-a-decade hookup?" he snorted. "Really? She's been lonely and alone for a really long time. She'll pick up now and then but it never lasts."

"It shouldn't."

"It could. She could tell a true lover."

"She may," he agreed. "But that's dangerous."

"So is living in today's world. Look at what she does." He stared at him. "So anyway, about the new girlfriend you have?"

"I do not."

"Uh-huh. The leggy model sort clinging to your front?"

"Publicity. They demanded the local beauty queen do such." He stared at him. "Am I the reason you're this bitter?"

"Watching Mom try not to be is." He stared at him. "So kinda. Yeah." He nodded. "If you're going to treat Mom like a pro, you should probably compensate her for that." Loki winced. "Hmm. Yeah. She's like a super fatty dessert you adore but only have rarely to keep in shape."

"Damn it."

"Yup. Not that she'd tell you that. We all heard her after you'd disappear again. You're like a bird that shows up to be fed, or to lay eggs, then disappears until you're hungry again."

"It would draw attention to her. My mother would find out and have her killed."

"Your mother needs the broomstick pulled out."

"Probably. I have no idea why she has such hatred but it is annoying."

"Yes but she'll probably meet your mom some day."

"I hope not. My mother is a fierce warrior and witch."

"Almost got that last part right," he said dryly, nodding at the doorway. He went back to packing. "I wish you and Mom would get along better. I really do. You'd make a great stepdad sometimes." He stared at him. "But I won't see Mom hurt. Ever. We all agreed you'd go bye-bye really quick if we caught Mom crying over you again." He gave him a pointed look. "Now, go greet your people, *Cousin*."

"Fine." He stood up. "I do not mean to hurt her so."

"At least that's something nice." He stared at him. "Really. Especially since the world gets more complicated and dangerous all the time."

"Point." He went to talk to the people there to see him. "What's going on now?" he asked politely. They led him off to talk to him about what they had heard. He explained it as a widowed cousin's wife he had flirted with for years. That led into the earlier lie easily enough and if Darcy showed up that was something they could understand.

His son rolled his eyes but finished packing and headed out to his car so he could find a better hiding spot. Maybe he'd pop in on Jacob in his mountain cabin.

Loki watched hin go, trying not to be sad. He had turned into the sort of parent he never wanted to become. His son was now bitter just like he was, but for more healthy reasons. It really had to be worked on before he turned into Odin for real.

***

The convergence was starting and Darcy was worried. Thor wasn't exactly late but he should be here soon. "Jane, do not wander off," she warned. "I don't want to lose you to this weirdness. I'd hate to find a real job."

"Fine." She waved a hand while studying her meters and measuring devices. Thor appeared with a thump, making her smile as she walked over to him. "Two years?" She punched him. "Two years, Thor?"

"I'm sorry, my Jane. My father must send me specially at the moment." He pulled her closer to hug. "Lady Darcy." She nodded and took the meter to go wave around for Jane. He looked down at Jane, who he hugged harder. "I'm sorry I ignored your needs." He kissed her.

Jane smiled and led him around to show him what she had found. Darcy shook her head but let her be happy for now. Later she could chew on Thor for Jane.

***

After the battle at the college, Darcy looked at Thor, who was sad. "What's wrong?" They were on the apartment's roof to stare at the mess being cleaned up.

"My mother was killed by the elves."

Darcy licked her lips. "I'm sorry you lost your mother but I'm not really sorry about it at all, Thor. Did you want me to sympathize?"

"You lost yours."

"At fifteen when that curse hit her."

Thor winced. "No one can remove that, Darcy."

"I know that. Even if she was alive she couldn't and wouldn't. I don't know why she hated us but it wasn't my business because it was well before my mother was born."

"You've met my brother."

"Yes, a number of times," she said dryly. "What of it?"

"Do you prefer him to me?"

"I'd prefer you to be from another family and to quit upsetting Jane. Apparently calendars and clocks don't work on Asgard?"

"The bridge is still broken from our battle."

"Yes, I know. I saved him."

He winced. "You do know of him."

"Um-huh. I saw him usually about once a decade."

"Oh." He looked down then looked at her again. "You're well acquainted?"

"Slightly. Why?"

"I'm wondering about his life down here, Darcy. I do care about him. Though Father wants him back to be put back into his cell."

She snorted. "Your father's fucked in the head, Thor, and needs to be shown that. After all, he did nothing to help your mother when she was attacked. Most husbands would've rushed to help her even if she could protect herself. As you did Jane."

He blinked. "I..."

Darcy stared at him. "Wouldn't you?"

"I would," he admitted, thinking on that. "My father has problems."

"Everyone has problems. Some people have a ton of them though."

"True." He considered it. "I would not treat Jane that way."

"You'd better not."

He scowled. "You could not harm me, Darcy."

She snorted. "Do you know what it's like to butcher for the fall, Thor?"

He winced, stepping back. "You had?"

"I grew up in a cottage in a country village. Are you sure that I haven't?" She smiled. He slumped. "You will treat Jane like a precious thing in your life or I will teach her how to fake mourn."

He nodded. "I will not treat her poorly, Darcy. Not ever."

"You'd better not. The same as you'd better learn how to tell times and dates. Two years?" She walked off to go back to their apartment downstairs.

Thor considered things. Darcy was quite fierce. He was not feared of her, but he was worried she would find him unworthy and he would suffer greatly before he managed to defeat her. Though, if his brother knew her he may come to her aid. He really had to talk to his brother about her. Perhaps he knew why she was that way.

***

Loki looked up as Thor walked into his office, staring at him oddly. "What are you doing here?"

"Brother." It had taken him weeks to find him thanks to some new friends in SHIELD.

"Not likely." He leaned back to stare at Thor. "We both realize that, Thor."

"Mother still cared for you."

"Yes, most of the time. What's going on now?"

"You know of Darcy."

"I do."

"She said you've talked often?"

"Quite."

"She is not displeased that our mother died."

"Were I her, I wouldn't be either. She did cause Darcy to lose her mother. And many other mothers in her family lines." Thor slumped, grimacing. "If I had her skills, would I have let Frigga last that long?"

"She is but a paper doer."

Loki snorted. "Are you certain?"

"She..."

"Thor, she had avoided the daughterly curse for decades. Do you believe she did not read a single thing? Did not learn a single thing?" Thor grimaced but nodded once. "I would treat her as you would any other woman, and with more kindness than you're known for. Do not tamper with the ones she protects."

"She nags muchly about how long it took me to get back to my Jane."

Loki nodded. "As I would. I never made a time promise to her. Did you?"

"I said I would return when I could."

"And it was two years?"

"She said the same thing," he huffed.

Loki nodded. "Remember the lessons on making promises, Thor?"

"Yes." He grimaced at his feet then at his brother. "Could you have a life with her?"

"If she wishes she can tell me thus."

"It may not be something she wants as it may set off the daughter curse."

"Or there's ways around that," Loki said dryly. "She's had a son."

"There are?"

"Yes, Thor." Was his adopted brother really that stupid that he didn't understand birth control spells?

"Oh." He considered it. "How old is she?"

"No comment in case people listen in." He stared at him. "Do not mess with Darcy. She will not spare you. Even if I wanted to and begged she would not spare you. Even if Jane asked she would not spare you."

"She would not hurt me. I treat her as if a sister."

Loki smirked. "Do you? Well, that's probably better than you do a brother at least." He stood up. "You will not win against her, Thor. She is not an enemy."

"Mother cursed her family."

"Your mother was a bitch, Thor. That proved it. She wiped out a whole group of people because one of them wanted to leave her service to get away from your father being a groping asshole. She left before she was molested by Odin." Thor winced, slumping again. "It started a war thanks to your parents being evil assholes of the ages. Whole groups died because of it. Are you proud of that history?"

"No." He looked at him. "I would make peace."

"Is there a way to make peace? At least she tolerates you. You should feel proud. At least you have not died for dating someone she claims as family."

Thor looked at him. "Could you talk to her about it?"

"I have. It's why she has not taken out all of us."

"She could not."

"You'd be shocked."

Thor made a face. "I do not wish to harm her more."

"And yet, each time she sees you, she sees the family of the ones who took out her family, Thor." He stared around then at him. "She is exceptionally strong of will to not smite you."

"I understand. I will speak to her of thus."

"That's fine. I would assume you'd be on good behavior with the one she claimed as family."

"Do you believe she would attack me?"

Loki shrugged. "I have not any idea, Thor. She is not the typical woman."

"Does she battle?"

"No."

"Then that may help me if she does." Loki stared at him. "I would not plan on it but I may need tactics to get out of it alive."

"Yes, you would." Thor winced again. "As would I. We're...friendly but I would not guarantee I would survive. We did her family wrong. On purpose. She has every right to loathe us. To fight against us. To avenge her family. The fact she has not... well, she does have some mercy."

Thor nodded. "Thank you for your counsel, Brother." He left, going back to London. He had much to think about. Could he continue to see Jane with Jane's near-sister hating him?

Loki shook his head, sending Darcy a message. Magically so no one like SHIELD could trace it. He did not need them staring his way either.

***

Darcy saw the small scroll appear, taking it to read. Then she sighed. "Thor's worried I'm going to smite him."

Jane looked over. "I'm proud you haven't."

"Me too." She looked over. "It's nearly time for me to change lives so marry away, Jane. Just be careful of Odin."

She nodded. "I saw when I was up there." She got back to her math. "You change lives?"

"Yeah. I can't be this young and pretty forever, Jane."

"Point I guess." She looked at her. "How long do you have?"

"Few years at the most probably."

"Huh." She nodded. "Going back to college?"

"I seem to do that a lot." She smirked.

Jane frowned. "Really?"

"Really. You can't get a good job without it these days."

"Do you have another degree?"

"Yeah. Three of them." She smirked with a nod. "No comment beyond that though."

"Is one computers?"

"No, that was a matter of necessity. It comes in handy."

"I guess it would." She frowned. "Any in science?"

"No comment."

"In physics?"

"No. Comment." She smirked and pointed at the door, making someone yelp.

Jane got up to see who that had been. "It's the thieves from New Mexico, Darcy."

"Hmm. I hope they got what was coming to them," she quipped, getting up to go stare at him. Agent Coulson stared back. "You needed to eavesdrop?"

"What are you?"

"Really patient with you because you're not dead yet."

Phil blinked a few times. "Could you even do that?"

She smiled. "Don't tempt me to try. Men like you want to make me become the witch I was called many times." Phil stepped back, nodding at that. "Anything else today?"

"Can we speak, Lewis?"

"No." She smiled, shaking her head. "Not at all. Because you're the evil in my life." He nodded at that. "I'd hate to have to go into hiding from you and your people. I would and then I'd repay it by being the next evil thing." She smirked. "Anything else today?"

"Are you a real threat to us?"

"That depends on you and yours."

He nodded. "We are interested in having you and your boss work for us. We can hide your...condition."

"No. Because you're not going to do that and I don't want to be a test subject. What I am, I was born as." He slumped. "And I don't care what your people want. You're threatening my existence and I'm not going to go extinct like some rare species of animal you've hunted to extinction. Or I'd have to repay the favor like I was a tiger."

"Are you why we found HYDRA?"

"I think that was someone else." She smiled. "I doubt you'd find him to talk to him."

"No, we cannot find our former agent."

She shrugged. "I've told his parents."

"Are you one of his parents?"

"No," she lied. She looked totally honest. She had learned how to lie excellently back before she had moved on from her first village.

"All right. If you should find more?"

"I don't like HYDRA. I only deal with them when I run into them though."

"I can understand that." He nodded. "All right. We would still like you to work for us."

"So you can steal more of my work?" Jane demanded. "No. Thank you anyway, Agent Coulson. I'd never work for SHIELD. You're thieves and you're dishonest. I don't need that complication because my work has bigger implications that could bring harm if it's misused. Your people would definitely misuse it. As the one who stole it from you when you stole it from me did just yesterday."

"That thing in Ireland?"

"Yes," Jane said with a nod. "That was something old that I had worked on. It got stolen by your people and then someone somehow got it from you. Then they used it to nearly destroy a city. That's not *my* fault since you stole it."

"I understand, Dr. Foster. Is there a way we can help you guard it?"

"Yes. End SHIELD," Darcy said. "Before you steal more harmful things."

He grimaced. "It was not for that reason."

"Yes but that was what happened," Jane reminded him. "You stole it. They got it from your agents. It's your fault and I'm not going to be blamed for that. I've already noted to the agents that showed up here what it was and how you stole it from me back then. I'm pretty sure they're trying to talk to some of your people." She walked off. "C'mon, Darcy. We need to move somewhere safer. Again."

"I've got some ideas." She nodded politely at the agent before slamming the door in his face.

Jane was ranting in the kitchen, mostly to her phone to her mother. Darcy was settling in to pack up the notes, finish what needed to be finished today, and then make plans to have them moved. She always worried about sudden moves, about her stuff being left behind for Jane's. About losing family heirlooms or everything really. But this time, they needed to get away from SHIELD. Before she had to do something drastic. SHIELD really needed to end for good. And take HYDRA with them.

She heard the agent still out in the hallway and huffed but he walked off a few minutes later thanks to someone else coming up the stairs. She smelled the familiar scent and smiled because that was her favorite grandson. He was such a good boy - when he wanted to be. If it wouldn't endanger them she'd introduce Jane to her boys but that would put them in trouble because Jane got drunk and chatty.

***

Loki showed up that night, staring at Darcy where she rested on the couch. "They really are quite pushy," he noted quietly, sitting by her feet.

She nodded. "They are. Most everyone is. Unless you're not talking about SHIELD?"

"No, I was." He stared at her. "Thor is worried you'll smite him."

"Thor should be worried. The first time he treats Jane wrong, I'm there." She stared at him. "The same as I would be for the sons."

"Do you claim her as your adult daughter?" he joked.

"No because I have the feeling that would set off the curse."

"I do not know," he admitted. He nodded at Jane as she came out. "Foster."

She stared at him. "Who're you?"

He grinned. "Loki."

"Thor warned me about you. Are you here to annoy Darcy? We've got to plan a move soon."

"I had plans of perhaps taking her to bed if she wanted." Darcy snorted, shaking her head. "Your son said it's been a while."

"No, there was a coed the other night," she quipped. He stared at her, one eyebrow arched up. "Did you expect me to wait?"

"No," he admitted. "As I know you didn't expect me to wait."

"You're the one who set the visiting schedule."

"True." He sighed. "I do not wish an argument."

"I'm all for hugs and cuddles." She sat up. "Otherwise, I'm sleeping on this couch."

He held out a hand with a grin. "Then come to my suite. It's most generous." She looked at Jane, who rolled her eyes but let them go together. He took her with him to his rooms, letting her look around. He smiled. "It's very nice here."

"It is. Cleaner than the ones in London too." He snorted, kissing her. She cast the spell that wove around his balls, preventing him from giving any female producing sperm. He wiggled and winced but nodded it was well set. She cast the one on herself that wouldn't allow a female pregnancy to progress. He stared down at her. "Never can be too careful."

"True, you never can be." He kissed her again, making her sigh and lean into him. "I'll use a condom anyway."

"Thank you."

"Did you at least disease check the young thing?"

"Of course. Did you with your last one? It was on the news with that leggy blonde hanging on you."

"She was a local beauty queen they made do that, Darcy. Are you jealous?"

She shook her head with a smirk. "You're not around long enough for me to have a reason to become jealous." He rolled his eyes but did take her to bed, making her a happy woman a few times that night while he got his own happiness. They laid there together, thinking thoughts about their families and the future plans they had to make to protect them.

They weren't the same thoughts. Or even in the same vein. Which might cause a huge problem for Loki and his sons. Or maybe just SHIELD to protect the sons.

***

"So, let me get this straight," Jane said while Darcy was making her walk around the park.

"Not where there's people who could listen, Jane."

"Fine." She looked at her. "You two are the epitome of slow burn, aren't you?"

"Yeah, pretty much." She nodded. "Not my choice. It might've been nice to have someone there but like many men, he disappears as soon as he's gotten fed his desired amount of puss."

Jane nodded. "I'm hoping Thor doesn't."

She snorted, shaking her head. "I'll kill his ass."

"Darcy!"

"I will!" She smirked at her. "Really."

"Uh-huh. I should get to give yours a shovel talk then."

"He shows up once a decade to get sex, Jane. He's more a long term one night stand."

"That makes sense I guess." She put her hands in her pockets. "The weather here is a lot different from New Mexico."

Darcy nodded. "I love the countryside too. A lot of foggy mornings, dew dampened grass, all that stuff." They shared a grin then at the man walking toward them. "Jane, did you wish up an engineer to appear in front of us?"

"No." She stared at him oddly. "Mr. Stark."

"Dr. Foster. Dr. Lewis." He stared at her. She quirked up an eyebrow. "That was truly fantastic."

"I need to go eat SHIELD's files."

"Wasn't. I did a better background check and ran into your daughter?"

"Not hardly. Curses on having daughters in my family."

"Huh. Okay. How...." She shrugged. "Asgardian?"

"Apparently at one point in time my people came from up there but Frigga cursed my people to that daughter curse." She grimaced. "And if you tell people I have to take you out to protect myself."

"Gladly, kid." He waved a hand. "SHIELD's still coming, ladies."

"We know," Jane agreed. "We're working on a move."

"And you work with a lot of them," Darcy reminded him. "They're infesting your building."

"I'd love them to stop that." He stared at her. "We can guard you both."

"For what price?"

"I like to have geniuses around me who could solve problems I create," he said sarcastically. "Really, Lewis."

"I don't know. Jane, New York?"

"I can't find stars in the city from the light pollution."

Stark looked at her. "We have other facilities. We're going to try to keep Thor anyway for upcoming battles."

Darcy nodded. "I'm so glad I defeated one by not letting Thor torture his brother some more." She walked around him. "You two talk, Janey. I see a person I know." She strolled over to where her grandson was watching. "Such a pretty day for a pretty boy to be out here staring at dowdy women in heavy jackets," she said dryly, smirking at him.

"We're guarding you two from HYDRA," he shot back with a smirk.

"Aww, thanks, baby." She blew a kiss. "Yeah, that's Jane."

"I noticed. Is that Tony Stark?"

"He's trying to seduce us to come work for him."

"Hmm. He gets a lot of attention." He stared at her. "What about when you have to disappear next time?"

"You know, there's a lot of people who're going back to hippie living styles." She winked, strolling on. The SHIELD agent gave her a dirty look so she zapped him, making him yelp and get away from her. "No SHIELD agents near the Jane," she said in a sing-song manner. "You know better!" The guy fled. She sighed, going to pet a dog across the park.

"Such a pretty puppy," she cooed. It sniffed and all but curled up in her lap to get cuddles. "Good puppy." The owner looked amused. She smirked at him. "Yeah, Jacob told me about you, dude. If you're looking for him, he's hiding. If you're looking for me, I'm hiding." She grinned. "I should take the dog though."

"Don't touch the wife's dog, Lewis," he said dryly. "There's a ton of agents around this park."

She winked. "Are you sure?" She got up and pet the dog one last time before walking back to Jane and casting some magic at the agents. She had to avoid hitting her grandson and one other one was apparently related. She stared at that young woman. No, she wasn't one of them. She was some sort of other semi-Asgardian or not human being apparently. She went back to Jane and Stark, walking Jane off. Stark huffed but followed. "We have a lot of agents in the park, Stark. Let's get somewhere less under surveillance. Before I have to rescue myself and Jane?"

"I'd help," he offered.

She smirked at him. "SHIELD would prevent it probably."

"I don't listen to them, Lewis. They had someone come in to corporate espionage me and my old stuff." He smiled at them. "So, lunch? My treat?"

"We can eat," Darcy said. "Jane forgot breakfast and lunch."

Jane sighed. "Sorry, Darcy."

"It's fine, dear." She patted her on the arm as they walked past the other agent. "Hey, SHIELD lady. Do I have to zap you too?"

"Um, hopefully not. We'd like to talk to Dr. Foster?"

"No." Jane smirked and shook her head. "Hell no in fact. Have a great day on some other realm." The agent stepped back with a nod. "Thanks though." She looked at Tony as they walked. "Does that package come with a paycheck for Darcy? I've had her as an unpaid intern for years and she deserves a paycheck."

"Yeah, we can do that." He looked at her. "Are you wanting to stay with Jane?"

"Yup. She'll starve or die from not showering otherwise."

"Do you have a beef with Thor?"

She shrugged. "Not totally. As long as he treats Jane well." She stared at him and he shivered because he could see the age in her eyes now. "He knows that though." She hid it again. Jane was sighing and looking up at that. "Paps," she warned with a subtle point.

"They know I collect geniuses," Stark quipped. "I've got a great collection of them in Stark Industries." He winked at Jane, who grinned back. "So, maybe the new one I'm building upstate? Or maybe the facility in Malibu?"

"The US is a bit dangerous with SHIELD around," Jane reminded him. "They can get to us easier there, Stark."

"That's reasonable." He nodded. "We have a few other places but they're mostly manufacturing instead of labs. We can look at that over lunch, ladies." He got them into his car and got in to drive. Jane was in the backseat for some reason. He glanced at Lewis.

"I fit back here and she doesn't, Stark. She's slightly taller."

"Plus it's a safer spot in case of a crash," Darcy agreed.

"You two are clearly together," he joked.

"Nah, Jane doesn't cuddle. Jane's into abs and rough hands. I like me some smarts but catty and sarcastic ones."

He glanced at her. "Seriously?"

"Yeah. I know Thor's brother. And he does realize this."

"By myths that was Loki?"

"Yeah, chaos god."

"Oooh." He winced. "Is that the one that would've invaded New York?"

"Yup. Longer story there."

"Is that longer story why we had a lot of frogs suddenly?"

"They'll revert in a few hours."

"Okay," he decided with a nod. "You're dangerous, Lewis." He grinned at her.

"Yup, had to protect myself for a long time, Stark. Usually by myself."

"Jane mentioned the possibility of a son?"

"Jane!"

"Sorry, it slipped out."

"Yeah, I do have a son. He's fine. Hiding like hell from SHIELD too."

"The one you talked to?"

"No, he's from a different agency and he's very nice. I ran into him years ago and ended up helping him during a case or whatever. He's cultured, snarky, smooth, and absolutely the man you'd never want to introduce to your mother. But he's cute and he can cook better than some chefs."

Tony hummed. "That's good. His agency?"

"UNCLE."

"Fuck, that was a show."

"Yes, they were amused." She grinned.

Tony sighed, shaking his head. "Great. Just...great. Do you know Mork?"

"Nanoo, nanoo," she quipped. "But no. They seem like neat people though. That backward aging seems neat."

"Huh," he said quietly, then blinked a few times. "Wow." She grinned when he stared at her when he had to stop for a light. "You're...real original, Lewis."

"Of course I am."

"Okay. I can put up with that. We'll work out how to protect you guys from SHIELD. If your...son shows up we'll see if he's employable so you can have kiddo time with him."

"He'd run from me. He's got a bad taste in girlfriends," Darcy quipped. "The last one was okay but she was a pageant girl and very greedy. From what he pouted she was good at being his little girl but she was also one to a few other guys to earn money on her back." She shrugged. "It happens. We see plenty of it in men too."

He nodded. "I've met plenty of that sort of woman. And men too." He parked and got them out so they could go inside to eat. He noticed one agent and sighed. Darcy carefully cursed her to have to run to the bathroom suddenly. The waitress was confused as she rushed past her but oh well. They settled down; Tony grinned at her for that move. "Cute."

"Yes we are." Jane nodded to agree with her.

***

Darcy looked up as the new lab's door opened, nodding at the agent there. "Hey, it's boyband jack booted thug!" she chirped. Jane glared at him.

"Not here for SHIELD, ladies. I'm an Avengers member most of the time now," Clint Barton said. "Can we interest either of you into coming for movie night? Thor's back."

"And he hasn't called me?" Jane asked. "Uh-huh."

Clint grinned. "He said you'd fuss."

"Ya think?" Darcy quipped back. "You have fun, Jane. I'll finish the filing and putting away."

"Okay. Thanks. Have fun on the train."

"Of course."

"You could live here," Clint said. "Stark would let you."

Darcy looked at him. "I don't worry about Stark, I worry about SHIELD being nosy fucks, Archer Boy." He grimaced at that. "We've already removed a few bugs and threw them off a balcony. They can have fun picking up the pieces."

He winced again. "That's gonna cause a fit."

"Oh well!" She grinned. "Have fun and guard Jane like I would."

"Of course." He walked Jane off while Darcy finished filing and putting things into locking cabinets. And a few safes. Which she changed the combination on. She also added something she had made so even if they could open it, it'd stop them. She gathered her things and headed for the nearest subway station.

It meant taking a train a few stops to transfer but she didn't want to walk up to that station tonight. She acted like she had her iPod on and she was bopping to the music but it wasn't. So when someone grabbed her bag to try to take it, she spun with the move and kicked them in the knee. That made them fall. She walked on faster, shaking her head. "Muggers," she complained loudly. "Just what I need today."

The agent she had kicked reported that in. She wasn't just a simple woman apparently.

On the train, Darcy noticed a redhead staring at her and stared back. "You're very pretty but I'm not into women, dear. Sorry." She smiled slightly. "Or agents for that matter." She got back to watching the walls zip past outside the train.

The redhead moved closer to her. "I'm supposed to make sure you get home, Miss Lewis."

She stared at her. "That's nice, but you won't. Any agent gets near my place and the security system comes up."

"How can you tell an agent?"

She smiled. "I know." The agent raised a manicured eyebrow. "Don't you worry about that, dear. But have a great night. Stark said they're doing a movie night since Thor's back." The redhead snorted. Darcy got up because this was her stop. She got off and got onto the transfer train, which was about to leave. The agent didn't manage to make it on so that was nice. Of course, she probably reported that so Darcy could watch out for other agents.

She casually looked around, smiling and petting the dog in a bag next to her. "Good pupkins." The owner looked at her. "I love dogs." The guy grinned back. She got off a few stops before hers and then got onto another train. It'd make her night atrociously long but it was safer. She finally made it home by the station that was a few blocks from her apartment, heading up and turning on the security system as she walked in. Someone in her kitchen yelped. "Oh, dear, an agent," she sighed. "Whatever shall I do, future frog?"

"That thing is worse than your little lightening toy," Loki complained, coming to the doorway to stare at her. She grinned at him for that. "You're later than you usually were?"

"Agents on the train. Not happy being a mayor?"

"Making sure you haven't smited Thor yet."

"Not yet. He just got back."

"He left my office two weeks earlier after trying to find a way around you smiting him." She grinned at that. "He thinks you simple, Darcy."

"Of course he does. I'm not like him. I don't need a hammer to channel my powers." He grinned at that. "So, how's being a mayor?"

"Fairly decent. Not many problems so far. I'm making chicken and rice."

"Cool. I could eat." She came in to wash her hands and set the table. He stirred the chicken pieces in the frying pan, smiling slightly at her as she moved around and turned on music. Something loud and shrieking made him yelp but it meant that the listening devices were dead apparently. He served and settled in to eat with his babies' mother. It was peaceful and no one had any complaints at him. She looked nice enough and ate for a change. "Jane is running you ragged," he said quietly.

She shrugged. "It's the whole moving process. A lot of moving things and unpacking things." She waved her fork around in the air then got more food on it to eat.

He nodded. "I've had a few days like that. Our youngest was back near there. Apparently he had a relationship that he broke when he moved suddenly."

She grimaced. "I stay out of most of it, Loki."

"I know. It lends you sanity." He dug in again, smiling at the plate then at her. "You need to relax."

"I'm surrounded by agents but it's good for Jane's career. I'm leaving this life in a few years though." She stuffed her mouth again.

"You can come hide among my new people."

She stared at him. "Didn't we do that in Geneva?"

"Do hush," he ordered with a huff at the end. "That was not my doing or my plan."

She hummed but nodded. "I was thinking a cozy little farmstead thing." She went back to eating, getting up to get seconds. He held up his plate so she split it with him. "Thank you for cooking tonight."

"It's not a problem. I needed to cook anyway." They had their seconds then he leaned back to stare at her. She finished her last bite, sipping her water to clear the food from her mouth. "It's a good night for a dance," he said casually.

"It is." She smiled. "But we have no room in here."

"There is a roof, Darcy. I can cast an illusion so none can see us."

"Then I accept. Though I have no idea how to get up there."

He smirked, getting up to take her up there. They settled in to dance under the moonlight with his illusion covering for them. Not a waltz, but the music from a nearby apartment was jazzy so that was good to sway to. It was good between them. He twirled her around and pulled her closer again, ignoring the one that was flying past. Thor could mind his own business. Preferably soon. Darcy zapped him so he fell with a yelp as the leather thong on his hammer broke and she fell out of his hand. Loki snickered into her hair, cuddling her closer. "So damn mean," he said in her ear.

"Thank you, dear." She leaned up to kiss him. "He's too nosy." He nodded, smiling as they finished dancing because the music had cut off. He led her back down to her apartment to get to the usual comforting things they did together. It meant Darcy didn't get any sleep that night, but neither did he, and he was energized by it. The spells always worked for them thankfully.

***

Darcy strolled into the lab the next morning. "Morning, Jane."

Jane looked at her. "You changed the safe combos?"

"Yeah." She plucked the device off to hold up. "Because someone tried to get into it." She grinned. "They're not happy with their lack of feeling in their hands."

"It doesn't EMP, right?"

"No, Jane." She opened the safe to hand her the laptop she used. Jane sighed as she got into it. "Saw Thor out for a fly last night?"

"He got bored and went to find something to drink," she sighed. She looked at Darcy, who shrugged. "Yeah, I'm..."

"Okay. We can handle that." She settled at her desk, checking it for new additions. Which got put into her empty coffee cup and then thrown down the trash chute in the hallway. She came back to get to work on Jane's paperwork.

Thor stomped in and huffed when he saw Darcy. "Are you why I fell last night, Lady Darcy?"

She looked at him. "Why would I have done that, Thor?"

"I saw you and my brother sharing a moment."

"He's an excellent dancer. It was nice of him to blow off stress by dancing with me." She stared at him. "Why were you in Brooklyn?"

"I was looking for mead."

"You won't find it," she offered. "Order it online."

"Fine." He walked over to kiss Jane on the cheek. "Are you busy all day?"

"I have to finish calibrating and setting up the machines, Thor." She looked at him. "I waited up for you last night so we could reconnect." He winced but nodded once. "Dinner tonight if you're not handling something?"

"That would be nice, Jane." He nodded at Darcy. "Of course I will watch over her for you."

"I know you will. Especially since someone tried to get into her work safe last night." He winced but went to talk to Stark about that. She looked at Jane. "Have fun. I'm probably making popcorn for dinner while I watch something fun."

"Why do you look so tired?"

Darcy grinned. "If he hasn't done that to you at least once, he needs a long lecture on how to treat a girlfriend, Jane." Jane blushed and ducked her head but she was smiling.

Stark stomped in. "What was that device? They said it was explosive." She held it up for him to look over. "No wonder that guy has no feeling in his hand." He looked at her. "You said he was a spy."

"Ah, him." She grinned. "I'll see what his bosses thought they were doing later." Stark handed it back. "That one's dead. I've got another one and I can rebuild one later."

"I want to see if I can make it better." He stared at her. "Romanoff said you avoided her on the train."

"Yeah. I don't like being followed home." She stared at him. "Especially not by agents. They don't need to know where I live or anything, though I did throw out a few devices of theirs last night too."

"They're mad about that. Those things cost money."

"Then they shouldn't throw them away by putting them in our things," Jane said dryly. "I threw out a few in the lab and in my bedroom, Stark."

"I'll have someone remove them." He walked off humming, bouncing that device in his hand. He really had to talk to people about all that. He didn't like it any more than the ladies did. He ran into the director, Nick Fury, staring at him. "Leave Foster and Lewis the hell alone, Fury. We all hate you putting devices in their things and trying to steal their work. I'd hate to see what your people do with a portal to another realm."

He walked around him. "JARVIS, any listening or taping devices that aren't our security system, they go up immediately and any new ones go up as soon as you see them please." All along the hall, devices went off and so did smoke alarms. He grinned at Fury. "That solves most of that problem. We'll find the remains to hand over later. Have a good day." Behind him Nick Fury was complaining until he started to bark. Stark looked then laughed. Fully human but barking instead of talking. "Lewis," he said happily.

"Not me," she called. "It came from upstairs. Ask Thor if it was him."

Stark grinned, going to ask Thor about that. "Did you cast the spell or whatever that's making Nick Fury bark like a pomeranian?" he asked.

Thor blinked a few times at him. "My gifts do not go towards magic, Friend Stark. Was it perhaps my love's friend?"

"She said it wasn't. It came from up here."

Thor looked around. "I do not see my brother but he is a master of illusions." He called him. "Was that spell yours?" He listened to Loki complaining he was busy with sewer updates. "I see. Thank thee, Loki." He hung up. "It was not him. I have no idea, Man of Iron."

"Okay. If you find out, let me know. All the listening and taping devices that aren't supposed to be here are gone," he announced toward the kitchen. "Fury could use some help too. He's barking."

Natasha Romanoff went to check on that weirdness. Fury was swearing in many barks; the director was about to lose his shit really. "Interesting." She walked off, taking film on her phone for now. "This will make some agents very happy to see." She hummed as she walked off. Fury was trying to catch her to grab the phone but she made it into the elevator before he could grab it. She sent it to her whole contacts list, the one of agents. The others wouldn't care if Nick Fury was borking a lot.

***

Darcy stared at that same agent that night. "Agent Romanoff, I didn't know you lived outside the tower," she said quietly but sarcastically. "Are you going to make my night longer by having to try to ditch your people?"

"We are making sure you get home safely, Miss Lewis."

"Hmm. I don't worry about that."

"They worry about you."

"Why?"

"HYDRA seems to think you're interesting."

"That's because someone blew up one of their bases, and I know who they were?" she asked with a smile. "I believe you talked to Jacob after that."

"Yes but they cannot find him. They can find you."

She snorted. "I can disappear into the ether and they'd have to put up with it, Agent Romanoff. They do not worry me. SHIELD worries me."

The agent tipped her head. "That is probably wise. They are very confused by you."

"Good. Keep them that way please." She smiled as she stood up to get off. "Once I'm more secure I'll start taking a cab or something. Okay? That way you're not forced to ride the subway every evening?"

"That could be nice. You could have lived in the tower."

"Why would I want that level of attention and all the spying going on?"

"Point I suppose. But most people wouldn't be aware."

"Yes but most people weren't nearly kidnaped by SHIELD a few times," she shot back. "We really wish they had died."

"They have their uses."

"Not when they're trying to steal Jane's work they don't."

"Perhaps. We can help you get home in a safer manner. You could drive."

Darcy snorted. "Drive a car in *this* city?"

"Point I suppose. You could live closer."

"No, I needed more than four hundred square feet in my apartment. Thanks though." She got off with half of everyone else. "Have a good night."

"Fine." She watched her go, calling that in. Thor had said that Darcy Lewis was not the average woman and could become a threat to him. She wasn't sure why, yet. But it was interesting. Why was Thor worried about that one young woman who was not trained to even defend herself properly? She knew Stark had something on her but not what because whatever it was he hadn't written down. So it was very odd. She would worry about the girl getting near the team but she seemed to want to avoid them almost completely.

***

Darcy looked over as the door opened. "Captain," she said with a nod. She glanced at Jane, who was stuck in science land. "If you need her, it'll take an act of coffee and food probably to get her attention. Her dinner should be here soon if you want to wait."

"No, I was going to invite whichever of you is Jane up for the team dinner? I didn't know she had an assistant."

"I'm Darcy," she said with a smile and a wave. "As for dinner.... She's got to talk to an observatory later tonight. Not sure how that'll work. Her order can sit in the fridge though. JANE!" Jane flinched, staring at her. She pointed. "Team dinner night?"

"No thank you." She pushed her hair back. "I need to figure out this anomaly before I talk to the Peruvian people tonight. But thanks. Tell Thor I'll see him tomorrow?"

"Sure." He looked at Darcy. "Thor's awfully worried about you for some reason."

She grinned. "That's because he knows I'm going to kill his dumb, blond ass if he hurts Jane." She shrugged a bit, looking every bit like the twenty-something she was pretending to be. "I'm creative and we had to have a shovel talk after he said he'd be right back and took two years."

He winced. "Even I know that's too long. So that's why?"

"Yeah, probably. If it's for some other reason I'll poison him some day soon."

"Can you?"

"Yeah. It's not that hard to poison someone, Rogers. Ask the SHIELD people." He just nodded as he walked off. She looked at Jane. "No wonder I've been followed home by SHIELD people!"

"Shit," Jane muttered. "What did he do?"

"I don't know. I really don't." Darcy grinned at her. "But I suggest he stop it." Steve walked back in. "What's up?"

"Why doesn't Thor like you?"

"Because his mother cursed my family to die if we ever had a daughter," she said bluntly. "She's just a bitch that way." Steve looked confused. "Getting in way old arguments, Rogers. Just...get out of the way if I have to go after him for him hurting Jane. Okay?"

"Can you really poison him?"

"Yeah. It's not that hard." She stared at him. "Ask the agents."

"They're really confused by you."

"Good!" She smiled. "That's better than bugging my damn bedroom like they keep doing. They must really have a lot of tech budget to throw away that way." He flinched back. "And I'm really over SHIELD's whole shit, Rogers. Okay?" She smiled again. "They brought it on themselves by stealing things from us.

"Then something *somehow* got out of their grubby little hands and got sold to someone who used it to almost take out a city in Ireland. This lab is very anti-SHIELD agents. Of any kind." He nodded at that. "And if Thor's trying to poison people against me, that's between me and Thor. Got it?" He nodded, leaving it there again. She got up to lock the door, staring at Jane.

"If you hit him, I want film." She got back to work. "Dinner?"

"Should be about twenty more minutes." She called down to the desk to alert them that they'd be getting dinner delivered soon and she could come get it. Then she went back to collating data. She'd figure out what she wanted to do to Thor later that night. When she wasn't under surveillance. Or at least not as much of it.

***

Darcy came in a few days later and the thing she was carrying set itself off as she walked into the lab. The shriek made Jane cover her ears but all the listening devices exploded. One of the laptops had a small fire but Darcy got that handled and the faulty thing that had been slid in got tossed out too. She put it on the desk and looked at Jane, who grinned and got back to work. The AI hadn't complained but Stark strolled in a few minutes later. "Bug killer?" she offered, holding it up.

"I heard the shriek, Lewis." He looked it over. "Very compact." He handed it back. "Let me go do my lab." He took it back to do that. All the nasty bugs went off. "JARVIS, are there any others?"

"Two cameras were both rendered unable to tape but they're still whole, sir." He put a tiny light on them. Tony got them to throw out. He went back to check on Lewis' lab. "Sir, there's only one camera and it is not rendered unoperable." Darcy got up to look at it then got it with her tazer. That finished that thing off. It exploded and destroyed itself.

Darcy put her tazer back into her bag and took the device back with a grin. "Thanks, Mr. AI."

"That's JARVIS," Tony said dryly. "I want the plans for that, Lewis." She shrugged but grinned at him. "You're not a bimbo. You made that."

"Perhaps."

"Yeah, uh-huh." He stared at her so she did cough up the plans for him to build his own. "Thanks." He walked off going over them to see if he could improve them. She was okay but not great as an electrical engineer. Clearly just an undergrad level of skill. He could make it more effective, wider ranging, and smaller probably. He ran into Romanoff in the hallway. "What now?"

"What was that device?"

"Bug killer." He went into his lab, locking the door after himself. Just in case she tried to steal more things.

"How did Lewis find that?" she demanded.

Darcy leaned out of her lab. "Sometimes we gotta find weird things to keep Jane safe, Romanoff. What did you expect me to do, keep flushing the damn things?" She pulled back in and then tossed the device into the hallway. All those bugs went off too. A few labs came over to look at it. "To kill e-bugs."

"Cool," one chemist said, taking it to do her lab. Yup, she had some too. The other labs all borrowed it for a few minutes to clear their own labs. They knew they might miss a few but the AI helped with that.

Romanoff was very confused. Why was the lab bugged? No one had told her about that. She tried to get Stark's attention but he was in the middle of working to heavy metal music again. She did gather up the remains of the devices to look them over. Yes, that was mostly SHIELD's designs. She handed them back to the assistant director that night, getting a dirty look.

"From the labs at Stark's building. They were not happy and destroyed them with something Lewis found." She walked off thinking about Darcy Lewis. She was not usual and not normal, even though she appeared to be a quirky young woman.

She was clearly not a spy, she had strong attachments for Jane Foster.

She wasn't a scientist like Foster. She was a humanities person apparently.

She had a displeased tolerance for Thor, when most people seemed to take to him almost immediately. Thor felt threatened by her as well, which was odd in itself.

Her internet history was practically clean but she had been looking at universities in Europe. Perhaps to help Foster go lecture, perhaps not. Many students did seem to want to study abroad and being in the humanities that made sense to her. You got to know more people that way.

She was pretty enough but didn't really show off her body at all. She wasn't scared of it, but she did cover up for modesty she didn't profess to believe in. And she did not date even though she was fairly pretty. She didn't go to bars to talk to people most of the time either. Thor had reported that Lewis knew someone else he knew and they had seen each other a few times. No names had been given though.

She had contacts that made that one agent flee for his existence before they ended it. That agent had fallen completely off the grid when he started a new life. Unless they ran into him on the streets they'd never be able to find him. That same agent had helped blow up a HYDRA base because his parents had apparently asked. It was probably that agent who had told Darcy who was a SHIELD agent around her to protect herself from them.

She had been seen talking to a spy from another group once in London, even had kissed him on the cheek, but that agent was known to be flirty so they might have had a fling or something for all she knew. If that was her taste, no one in the tower was going to be on her list to date so that was a good thing to know. Though the harmless ones that most women drooled on seemed to set Lewis' hackles up. Rogers hadn't even gotten a gooey look from her.

She wasn't Asgardian. Thor had said she wasn't. Could she be from some other culture up there? That could be possible and why she hated Thor. It would explain a few things about her behavior but she was still not fitting well into that mold of a recent immigrant to earth.

So who or what was Darcy Lewis and did she have to worry about her?

***

Jane followed Darcy home that weekend. They had things planned for so she was staying on her couch for the night. Jane started to ask a question but Darcy shook her head. "We're not at the tower."

"SHIELD and others can hack into any publically sourced video system for security reasons. It was part of the 9-11 authorizations, Jane," she said quietly, waving a hand at the camera.

"Oh, I didn't know about that." She considered it. "What did chemistry and computers have to do with weaving? I saw something online about that."

Darcy smiled. "Weaving would also probably include the spinning parts and the dying parts, so that's chemistry there. To make the wool or whatever stronger, the dyes better, all that. As for computers." She crossed her feet, staring at her buddy. "The first computers, you've seen them and the punch cards?" Jane nodded, of course she had. "Well, those are the same as the cards that weaving machines use to make the patterns when it's not a woman using the loom herself."

"So all that came from weaving. Which is why so many women were into computers originally," she realized. Darcy smiled and nodded. "Interesting." She considered it. "Are you weaving?"

"I am. I finally got the loom set up. Just the table top one so it's only scarf width. I can't get my big one out of storage because it'd never fit in my apartment unless I gave up the couch and the bed." Jane nodded she got that.

"What are you planning now for next move?"

"College town probably. I thought about going after a history degree but I'd have to smack someone who dissed peasants." Jane nudged her with her shoulder so she grinned back. "Seriously."

"I know you would. Go for something like IT so it uses your skills."

"Yeah but that stuff bores me greatly."

"It pays well."

"It does." She considered that. "Maybe network admin or something then. Or maybe something like PR work for social media. Speaking of, I was asked if you had any social media." Jane shook her head quickly. "I told that college that you didn't because it was a distraction and people stole stuff and threatened you so you only had a small facebook presence to keep up with some friendly geeks." Jane grinned at that. "He'll send you things the normal way to show you about coming to talk to their university. Which you probably won't want to do. It's a conservative college and they'd hate who you're dating. They had a huge demonstration."

Jane grimaced. "We'll see then. I could open a lot of minds." Darcy nodded. "I guess I could also get a lot of those comments from men that make me want to open their skulls instead."

"Don't tempt me, Jane." They got up to switch trains, Darcy holding onto Jane's arm so she didn't get lost in all the people. "C'mon, we've got to switch tracks." She led her to that one and it got them closer to her apartment than the usual ones. It did mean they'd have to cross a busy street but it was a block closer. Jane would appreciate that more.

***
Part 3 by Voracity2
"You weave?" Natasha asked them on Monday.

"I do," she agreed, turning to look at her. "I can do a few homey craft type things. Why?"

"How did you even learn?"

"A town auntie, Romanoff. She taught a lot of the girls in town how to weave, spin, embroider, crochet, and knit. I suck at embroidery though."

"That's interesting. I didn't think anyone did those things."

"There's a great big resurgence of former home craft skills. Just like cooking at home is coming back into style."

"Can you actually spin?"

"Yeah. I'm not *great* at it and I'm out of practice but yeah, I can. I just need raw wool. I can take it after it's removed from the goat, sheep, or rabbit and turn it into full blown fabric."

"Do you sell your scarfs?"

"I have in the past. Right now I'm weaving for stress relief." She shrugged a bit. "It'll be weeks before I get one finished long enough."

"Interesting. Do you not wear them? I noticed you wear mostly knit ones."

"Mostly crocheted but sometimes." She touched her current one. "Those are thinner fabrics, I can't use them for warmth and some are downright thin enough to almost see through so I can't use them really for keeping the sun off my breasts and to keep men out of them."

"Is that why you cover up so much?"

"Yeah. Men think I'm stupid because I have breasts and I don't use my body that way. Not since I was an undergrad waaaayyyyy back when." She smiled slightly. "It's just easier and then I can shock the ones I want to see them easier."

"I had not thought on that facet of it. Huh. A few people wondered if you were body hating or something."

"I'm slightly self conscious about how often I trip but otherwise, not really." She glanced at Jane then looked at the agent again. "I had to slap a few too many men who were all 'but they're pretty and standing up' about my body over the years."

"I can understand that. I do enjoy ruining that sort myself. If you do make one to sell, keep me in mind?"

"I can try."

Natasha smiled. "Thank you, Darcy." She left, going to add that to the personality profile she was creating.

Darcy looked at Jane, spinning her chair almost all the way around then back. "There's days I miss the courtly stuff because it kept men from being idiots."

Jane hummed. "Did it actually work for everyone?"

"Yeah. Victorian courtesy stuff was clearly for everyone or they were cads, Jane. You were polite and not touching in public, and didn't stare at the tits either, then were wild at home."

"I didn't even think about that. Usually I just think about all the repression."

"Oh, no. Victorians were hella into piercing things and a lot of people complained about nipple piercings being bad for new mothers." Jane stared at her oddly. "Seriously! They're the ones that gave the world the PA piercing because your pants were supposed to not show that you had anything down there. So you pierced it and then hitched it to a garter on your thigh. That's why which side it hangs on is called dressing, that piercing was called a dressing ring."

Jane shuddered. "Wow."

"Yeah. Victorians were only repressed with their spouses and in public. They made nude trading cards and all that too."

"I...had no idea."

She nodded. "With all the pre-Victorian sex clubs in England? Yeah, a lot."

"Wow." She got back to work with a head shake. "Can you wear a corset?"

"Jane, I'm *fantastic* in a corset, dear." She snapped her fingers with a grin. "I always have been." She got back to her own work.

"I need to dress up for something for Thor," Jane admitted. "I have no idea how."

"Find out the dress code, find a dress, go to a spa to get yourself pampered, massaged, buffed, waxed, nails and hair done, then put on the dress and shoes to go with him."

"I know that!"

Darcy grinned at her. "I'm horrible with picking things. If he tells you what you need to wear we can go looking." Jane wouldn't make the same mistake she had, nearly wearing red to a funeral she didn't know she was to attend.

"Thanks, Darcy." She got back to her work, making herself a note so she could remember to ask Thor about that. "I wonder if there's jewelry allowed."

"Probably. Formal means jewelry."

Jane got up to go talk to her boyfriend. She found him kicked back talking to Clint. "Hey, Thor, I got a letter from your mother's head maid telling me I had to prepare myself for a formal ball coming up?"

He looked confused. "Why would you, Jane?" She handed the letter over. He shook his head. "I'm not sure if I'm going or not, much less taking someone. That would open them up to gossip and talking by the court." He handed it back. "I would not worry about it, Jane."

"Okay. I wanted to make sure since that would mean buying an expensive dress and all that."

Thor shook his head. "Nay, it is not important to you."

"Then I'll just worry about a gown for formal awards." She went back to the lab to tell that to Darcy.

Clint looked at him. "Aren't you two dating?" Thor nodded, looking confused. "Yeah, that's when you take the girlfriend to things, Thor. To us, girlfriends are like pre-wives and you'd take a wife to that thing, right?" Thor nodded again slowly. "Then why not Jane?"

"They will hound her for being a Midgardian."

Clint nodded. "If you two end up marrying, will that get any better at that time if they don't get used to her?"

"I have no idea," he admitted. "But I am loathe to go to such events. They are dreadfully boring."

"Got your back on that point. All the ones I've been to were too. Don't princes have to show up at things?"

"Sometimes. My father has not demanded. If so, I may take Jane with me."

"Thor, planning for those things takes months. To find a good dress, get it altered, arrange for hair and nail appointments, all that stuff," Natasha said. "So if you need her to go with you to something like that you have to give her good warning time to find things that she'll need."

Thor grinned. "It's easy enough to whip up a dress, Natasha."

"It takes days to sew one," she corrected. "If you have the pattern and don't have to make one. Which can take another few days to a week extra. Plus fittings, finding all the fabrics. Here we can buy one but it'll never fit her right so she'll have to have it altered and they usually ask for a month's time to do that work." Thor's mouth fell open. She nodded. "Plus getting a decent hair appointment can take that same month. Plus the accessories like shoes and jewelry."

"Wedding dresses are the most common formal dress women will ever wear and it can take them months to find one. They say to start looking a year before your wedding," Clint agreed. "That way you have time to find it, have it made and shipped to you, then altered. I've seen brides who went to nine different shops before they found something they think they could stand but never found one that spoke to them."

Natasha nodded. "Grishma in Weapons searched for three years for her perfect dress, as soon as she knew she was staying with that boyfriend. Then it took a year to make because of the embroidery and beading. Plus a few weeks for fittings." Thor grimaced again. "You can't make a fancy dress in a day, Thor. Even with magical sewing machines and we don't have those down here." She looked at Clint. "I've found out Lewis weaves."

"Really? That's an old timey craft." He nodded a bit. "That's cool though. Think she could help you fix that one gown you ripped?"

"I don't know. I didn't ask. Would weaving lead to sewing?" She called her lab. "Lewis, a question," she said putting it on speaker. "I have a gown that I do adore but it has a rip. Is that something you could help me fix?"

"Probably not unless it was on a seam. Then you'd have to deconstruct that panel, reweave the edge, then resew it. Unless it's somewhere you can hide by putting lace over."

"Not really. It's near the middle of the skirt."

"If it's a silk or a satin sort of material probably not then. A few others, they can repair with chemicals because it's partially plasticizer but I'd have to say probably not. They could replace that whole panel with a new one though. If you could find matching fabric, any good tailor could do that."

"That's a thought I didn't have. How do you make lace?"

"The traditional way? A very tiny thread and some tiny crochet hooks. Modern lace is machine made."

"Thor thinks you can whip up a fancy ballgown in a day or so," Clint said, leaning closer.

Darcy snorted. "Weaving three yards of fabric can take two days for a really skilled weaver in top form as long as it's single color and no patterns. With patterns it can take as much as a day to make three feet depending on how complex so that's three times as long for three yards and a lot of formal gowns take more than that length. Sewing a formal level dress, which is usually multiple layers and special, bitchy fabrics can take a week to sew if you work on it constantly but that's if you already have the pattern and it fits nearly correctly.

"Add another week to make a full new pattern if you know what you're doing or a few days to mix and match if you have other patterns that would work and only need a tweak. Then an extra day to sew on anything like lace borders and buttons. Though, that would take a specialty machine. A home one would do but you need a surger to do it properly and the seams to hold for a good while.

"Then comes at least three fitting appointments to get everything right. If you have to have a matching hat it can take another two weeks so have someone do that at the same time. Plus finding the damn shoes, or shoes for feet that you'll damn later if they're heels. And finding or borrowing jewelry.

"Getting the good hair appointments should be scheduled the day you find the dress so it'll be the right time and place. I know the one Pepper suggested she go to for a trim has a two month waiting list. He may be thinking about men's clothes, which are easier and have simpler seams. They don't have fitting seams or pleats or anything."

"How would you know?" Thor demanded.

"Because I've worked with some tailors who did Victorian clothes, Thor. They had to hand sew most things so it took at least three times longer. I can't sew very well but I did have to help them fit a few times. Mostly for remaking things into different, more fashionable styles."

"Interesting," Natasha said. "Thank you, Darcy."

"Welcome." She hung up.

Natasha looked at Thor, who looked pissed. "Those are specialty jobs so you pay for that expertise. You can pay fifty dollars just to have a shirt fit these days."

"Getting my one suit tailored cost me about a hundred," Clint agreed with a grin for her. "Women have fancier duds."

Thor shook his head. "I have never seen it take my mother that long."

"Your mother was a queen, she had a staff on hand who already knew her measurements, had the patterns already, and were probably sewing at least a month in advance," Natasha told him. "Like the one in England who has her personal dresser doing all hers." Thor slumped down, nearly pouting.

"Think about how long it takes to make a sword," Clint told him. "It's the same level of skill only in fabric instead of metal, and it takes roughly the same amount of time to do all the small details." He looked at Natasha. "Weren't there women blacksmiths?"

"Yes, I believe so. From what I've read they were wives who took over after their husbands died."

"So maybe Lewis will learn a new craft from Stark."

"Perhaps. I know she said she's barely gotten her smaller loom set up. Her full size one is too big for her apartment."

"Yeah, New York City apartments are notoriously tiny everywhere but in this tower."

"Stark did spoil us." She looked at Thor. "So if there is one that you need Jane to attend with you, do give her warning to get things accomplished."

Thor scowled at her. "They would not accept her, Natasha."

"Then why date her just to dump her when you find someone better?" she asked back. He glared. She stared at him. "It seems it. You're not truly seeing her if you can't or won't introduce her to your friends and family, Thor. You're just fucking her."

He slumped again. "I have no idea of such things."

"Well, some kings had mistresses I suppose," she said dryly. He glared again, getting up to go talk to Jane about that. Of course, they heard the medical announcement that Thor needed to go to the infirmary thanks to walking past a lab that had exploded. Natasha shook her head. "That's bad."

"I wonder if Lewis rigged that," he muttered.

She smiled. "I don't think she's capable of that."

"Maybe. I'm starting to wonder if she's some sort of Asgardian."

"I had that same thought." They shared a look. "Her background is clean. Very clean."

"Huh." He nodded. "I know that one agent is still hiding like hell from her calling his mom."

"Sometimes that can be wise," she admitted. "Even Hill agreed with that."

He grinned. "We'll have to see how that plays out."

"Darcy did promise she'd hurt him if he hurt Jane. Thankfully she's not moved in with him yet." Stark came past them to get more coffee, shaking his head the whole way. "Is Thor fine?"

"Burned a bit. Singed his hair. Either he's a clueless dick or a using bastard, I'm not sure which. You should talk Rogers into talking to him about how to treat a Midgardian girlfriend." He walked off shaking his head as he sipped his coffee.

Clint grinned at her. "He might appreciate that."

"Steve or Thor?" she shot back with a smirk.

"Steve."

"I'd rather see Jane with someone like Steve if they do break up. At least we know he's decent. Could probably use trained in bed perhaps but he'll treat her well enough and support her working while pulling her from the lab so often."

He grinned. "She does seem to need it." He leaned back. "That brother he was complaining about?"

"Loki? I'd have to meet him to see if he was as messy as Thor is."

"Huh." He nodded. "Think he's down here?"

"Yes. I do." He stared at her. She grinned. "I think SHIELD may have spotted him as well. Tall, lanky, dark hair?"

"That guy from the roof?"

"Perhaps. I'm not certain."

"Huh. That may explain why Thor hates Lewis."

"He doesn't seem to like anyone not him or his Warriors Three buddies." Clint nodded that was true. "He appreciates them but liking them?" She shrugged.

***

Loki got the email from the blind email account, staring at it oddly. "Thor has upset Jane to the point where I need to smite him. Do you have a favorite method of smiting I can borrow?" he read, then smiled. He sent back a question about what the idiot had done. So she told him everything. He winced.

"No, she cannot turn that down by not showing up. Even if they are broken up. It will insult Odin and he'll try to invade Midgard for that." She sent back a 'shit'. "Indeed," he joked, answering that word. He suggested a nice thank you note instead of just not showing up. You know, having manners. Darcy agreed and had Jane copy the letter she wrote out for her so it was in her handwriting. Then Jane went up to see if she could find a raven. Darcy followed, charming the raven to take the letter for them.

Then they went back to the lab. Darcy sent him a picture of a dress for some reason. "It's not really my shape, woman." He sent that back and she snorted and said it was for her because she had a date then sent another one and asked which one looked better on her. He stared at it.

His answer back of 'answer the door naked so he doesn't waste your time in more than the bedroom' made her laugh and snort and tell him no, it was a first date, not a sex date. Then she sent him a third picture and said she'd wear that one. He groaned. That one was showy and would look fantastic. It was that same scarlet he always put her in. He slumped, staring at that picture.

He really did have to figure out his love life so he could fix Thor's tragedy before it caused a war.

***

Darcy watched Thor stare at Jane like he was disappointed in her. It was his own fault. Clearly his mother had missed a few manly lessons. She looked at Steve, who was giving her odd looks. She shrugged and held up the hand cuffed to Jane, who was rolling her eyes. "One of the security team jumped and hated us because Jane turned on a machine while he was trying to nag me about being here and a woman in the lab. So we're officially under house arrest," she finished sarcastically. "I don't have something I can cut them with. Do you?"

He looked at the plastic-steel woven zip tie style cuffs, trying his pocket knife. Nope. "Sorry, Lewis."

"It happens. If we have to, we'll go borrow some acid from a chemist. I'm mostly waiting on Stark to come tell us it's fine to do that." She shifted, making Jane shift backward. "Sorry, Jane. But sit, please." Jane sat down with a sigh. She waved their cuffed hands when Pepper stopped to stare at her. "Security guy hates women."

"I think I've got a report on him, Miss Lewis. Are you all right?"

"I'm good. Just waiting on a resolution so I can go home after borrowing some acid from a chem lab."

Pepper nodded. "Does anyone else have a knife?" she asked.

"We tried," Natasha admitted. "So did Steve. They'll need an acid."

Jane looked at her wrist then at Darcy. "If only I liked girls," she joked.

Darcy smirked back. "It's not bad but you're not cuddly, Jane." Jane nodded that was true. Banner came up with a vial of acid for them. Darcy dragged Jane to the bathroom to release them. They came out separately because Darcy really had to pee. She came out wiping off her hands on a paper towel she threw out. "There, that's better. Thank you, Dr. Banner."

"Welcome, Lewis. Stark's still yelling so you probably have to wait."

"That's fine. I can sit here and look pretty." She flopped back down.

Jane looked at her. "You're more than pretty, Darcy. Quit that." Darcy shrugged but grinned. Jane looked at Natasha. "Sometimes she has a negative body image."

"Sometimes all women do." She settled in to watch Clint finish cutting up parts of dinner so she could cook. Darcy came in when she went in there, helping her with things. "It's good someone else can cook."

"I've had to feed myself many years. And sometimes Jane too." She handed over the mushrooms. "Needed those?"

"I did." She got into stir fry she was working on, humming as she worked.

Thor looked at Steve, who was shrugging. "She seems nice."

"She is," Jane said firmly. "She just doesn't put up with putting us in danger."

Steve nodded. "Wouldn't want to do that, Foster." Jane grinned at him. "So, how are you doing the upcoming speech?"

"I have a speech? Darcy?" she called.

"Two weeks, the speech's mostly written, you're speaking on the bridge and your newest work at that college in front of idiot students who think they know something since they'll be mostly undergrads. Basically two classes of astro people."

"Oh, okay. Where?"

She pointed the knife uptown. "That way by a few blocks."

"That's handy. No flying this time." She got into her notes, finding that listed on the calendar. "Eeehhh, I hate that guy."

"He's the teacher," Darcy reminded her. "So he's screwing up people who want to be you. He's even driven some women out of science, Jane."

"Screw him then. I'll prove what women are in science for. Maybe he'll retire in a fit of poutiness about being a man."

"Do they still do that?" Steve asked her.

"Yeah." She looked up at him. "Often. I'm still mad that the Nobel committee won't correct their problems when they got proof that women had done the whole work and men had stolen it to get an award. They should have been noted that new evidence said that the men were idiots after all." She got back into her calendar. "Why am I looking at a grade school, Darcy?"

"Stark's thing about talking to young students," she called back, handing over the peppers. "I just rough chopped instead of making matchsticks. Those ones were getting floppy."

"That's fine. Though can we make smaller chunks?" Darcy took them back to do that. "That'll help." She put them into the pan. "Onions?" Clint slid that cutting board over. "Thank you. The meat?" Clint got it from the fridge for her with the sauces she had mixed earlier. "Thank you. Someone has started the rice already?" Clint moved to do that in the rice cooker, and Darcy added a few things to make it nicer. "Lemon peel?"

"Yeah. It'll go well with all that and the scallions you're adding." She grinned. "A bit of zing."

"Huh. I hadn't thought of that." She shrugged and decided she could try it. Darcy went to look over Jane's shoulder and show her something on her phone.

"Oh, hell," Jane muttered. "What's that for?"

"Award." Jane looked up at her. "Business suit though since it's daytime. I checked, they said nice dress or suit."

"I can do that. I do have the mauve one."

"It's gotta be replaced, Jane. It's got a hole, it's thin, and your only dress is about as bad. Find a new one?"

"I guess," she huffed. She put her phone down, looking at the staring people. "I'm not the clothing girl that some are. As long as I'm covered and comfortable I'm good." Pepper smiled at that. "I couldn't stand to wear business suits every day, Pepper."

"I can fully understand that. Not everyone can."

"Skirts can be nice but annoying," Natasha agreed, looking at Darcy.

"I've done my share of it but I do prefer leggings." She looked over as Stark came off the elevator with a huff. "Am I cleared to leave?"

"Yeah, go ahead, Lewis. He's fired and if he gives you shit, kick his ass."

"I can't really do that. I can taze him though." She smiled as she grabbed her bag off the couch to put on. "Laters, all. Have a good dinner." She left, going to catch a train.

Jane shook her head. "Darcy is very lively sometimes."

"Jane, I was going to see if you wanted to accompany me to the library event next week," Thor said.

Jane blinked at him. "I thought we broke up, Thor." He stared in open-mouthed horror. "If I'm dating, I expect my boyfriend to be at my events while I'm going to his. You refused to go to two things next month with me." She stood up. "So I thought we broke up." She walked off, waving. "Thanks for the rescue, Stark. Have a great night."

"You too, Foster. Have fun with whatever you're doing tonight."

"Calculus. I need stress relief and it's better than a vibrator."

"It can be," Bruce admitted. "Not that I get much use out of vibrators."

Tony grinned at him. "You could."

"No thank you. Not my thing as the young kids say these days." He settled into his chair. "Lemon and orange zest in the rice isn't that uncommon in Europe or Asia, Natasha."

"I hadn't had it that way. We have one without and one with."

"That's fine." He smiled at Pepper. "You could probably suggest where Jane should shop for that new dress. You're both built on that skinny, fashion designers like your form sort of way."

"I do have one I could recommend. I'll send her an email later. Maybe Darcy could pick up something nice."

"The places you shop wouldn't have anything to fit her chest," Natasha said dryly. "They just don't fit anyone over a B cup, Pepper. I have that same problem. Though Darcy usually does look cute. Not fully out of her college years but cute." Everyone nodded at that. She finished up the stir fry and let it stay warm for now while the rice finished cooking. She came out to sit down. "The rice cookers say fifteen more minutes then I'll go stir things together with the sauces." They all nodded, getting comfortable. "That guard?"

"Hates women apparently," Stark said dryly. "Thought women should only be property to be kept safely at home. I'm about to let him see Foster's portal mistakes that nearly ended London." He grinned. "But he's fired so he shouldn't annoy you either."

"I just stun them and walk over those sort."

Pepper nodded. "I tend to rip them verbally then walk off smugly. It's my defense style." She smiled.

"I growl. Usually people take the hint," Bruce quipped.

"Me too," Clint agreed with a nod. "Or I visibly tune them out as I walk around them."

Stark looked at him. "We noticed." Clint shrugged. "Tell me if there's an issue with the comms earpiece?"

"I can do that. I tend to link them together. There's a spot for the SHIELD ones."

"Bring them to me tomorrow sometime in the morning and I'll make sure, Hawkass."

"Thanks, Stark." He looked in the kitchen then at Natasha, who rolled her eyes. "Do we think Lewis bakes?"

"Yes, she does," Stark said smugly. "I stole a muffin yesterday."

"Awww. Damn it."

"They were even mostly healthy since she was trying to tempt Jane into eating again." He shook his head with a sigh.

"I remember those days," Pepper quipped with a smirk for him.

He stared at her, then blew a kiss. "At least you kept me alive, Pep." She nodded with a grin.

Bruce shook his head. He knew that state all too well too. All scientists had it when they were nearly at a breaking through point. Or a breaking point sometimes.

***

Darcy came home from her date, taking off her scarf as she walked into her apartment. She knew Loki was there. She had felt him, and her security system had said so. She nodded at him, hanging her purse and wrap up then kicking off her shoes as she locked the door. "Bad day being a mayor?"

"Not really. I've straightened out the minor issues they were having. Today I had lunch," he said blandly, staring at her. "Nice date?"

"Not bad." She smiled, walking around him. He pulled her back with a touch of magic, staring up at her. "What? I was going to change."

"I remember when corsets were worn on the inside," he said dryly.

She smiled. "Things change, as you know." She looked at her purple dress with an external charcoal gray waist cincher then at him again. "I found it in a small resale shop." She grinned. "Let me go change."

"You do look nice."

"Thank you." She curtseyed before going to get into regular clothes. She came out in leggings and a long t-shirt. "So why the visit? Just bored? Want a glass of inexpensive yet tasty wine?"

"Please." He got up to join her in the kitchen, taking his glass to sniff then taste. "That is nice." He sipped, watching her. She stared back. "Why did you not tell me that things were bad when I showed up?"

"Why bring down the two hours you were there? Not much you could really do."

"I..." He grimaced. "I was unfair to you and the children." She tipped her head, staring up at him. He sighed. "I truly was."

"You were absorbed in other matters," she said. "I didn't expect anything else. Really, I nearly did give the boys up for adoption, especially the first one." She took a sip. "It got me a lot of long looks and a lot of bad talking about us." She took a bigger drink. "But that's probably not why you're here."

He put the glass down and took hers to put down with his, staring at her. "I would have provided if I had known."

"Every decade for two hours?" she asked. "Really, Loki?"

He sighed. "I would have found a way to provide for you and the boys." He kissed her on the forehead, staring down at her. "I did wrong on that. I'm sorry."

"It's nothing we can change." She took a real kiss. "Still did better than Thor has. They've broken up by the way."

"I got a message from Thor asking for advice for how to get his Jane calmed down."

"In the last week?"

"Yes. Two days ago."

She just nodded then shook her head. "No. He refused to treat her like a girlfriend. He was confused that Jane wanted him to go places with her and expected him to go places with her and she expected to go places with him."

He winced with a sigh at the end. "That explains much. Though there are SHIELD agents getting nosy around me."

She quirked an eyebrow up. "I've tried."

"I know." He took another kiss, pulling her closer. "His mother would not have been pleased at all that." She smirked. "I know but she would hate you for other reasons."

"Hmm." She stared up at him. "Did you just need some comfort?" He nodded so she brought the wine and glasses out to the couch, sitting against him so he could calm down. She heard the magic coming and looked up. "Incoming," she said quietly, taking another sip of wine.

He tested and sighed. "Einhenjar." He gulped his and poured more. "They will not destroy this apartment, Darcy. I won't allow it."

"Did you forget you taught me combatives?"

"Yes. Though you're very delicate." She smirked. The two guards tried to bust in and had to scream at the way the door bit them back. "We're not accepting visitors," he yelled. "Go home!" He took another bigger drink, topping up their glasses with the rest of the bottle.

"Should I go get that hairpiece?"

"They'll attack for that."

"Yes, because apparently Odin couldn't keep it in his pants." She sipped her wine with a sigh. One of the guards knocked hard. She got up to go answer the door. "Yes?"

"We require our prince's presence, woman."

She hit him with the tazer, staring at him as he thrashed on the ground. "Really? Why come here then? The only one here is myself and a mayor of a small town. Anything else?" She put the wine glass down on the side table, staring at the one still standing.

"Odin requires his son."

"Thor's at Avengers tower." She pointed. "That way by about fifteen miles. Big, tall building with a huge A on the side in lights." The guard looked confused. "Thor's not here. I'd never let him rest in my house."

"Woman, we require the other son I can clearly see behind you."

Loki got up to walk over there. "I'm no son of Odin. He has no right to summon me."

She put a hand on his arm, staring up at him. "Want me to write your people that you'll be late to work tomorrow?"

"No. I have no problem getting to work." The guard tried to grab him so she zapped him, making him fall down holding his stomach. "You still own that device?" he asked with a smile.

"Yeah. I love my taser pal." She grinned, kissing him gently. "Have fun."

"You as well." He finished his wine and left.

"There, now you can quit bothering me."

"You will pay for upsetting Odin, woman," the guard she had gotten sneered as he got up. She walked off with a sigh, confusing him greatly, coming back with something she threw on them, making them both scream and lock up. "What is this foulness!"

"Chemical restraints." An officer walked up the hall cautiously. "Come on, Officer." She waved a hand. "These are two of Thor's people being asses and looking bad on Asgard. They decided my guest of the night was Thor's brother so came to kidnap him." She sipped her wine, leaning on the door frame. "I hit them with a chemical restraint a former school buddy made for me a few years back. So they're frozen stiff at the moment."

"A neighbor reported screaming?"

"Yes, I own a taser." She smiled. "They're idiots. Rude, obnoxious idiots. But Odin just had to send them after his son he hates." She finished her wine. The glass went behind her on the table for her keys and mail. "I don't like them trying to break into my apartment."

"I wouldn't either," the officer agreed, calling in for help removing them. "Can they walk?"

"It's frozen their skin for about eightish hours she said." She grinned. "I've had to use it a few times in the past. I need to get her to make me more if this is going to continue." She looked at the guards, who were sneering. "Yes, we Midgardian women do tend to protect ourselves. It's no longer the time when you can rape, pillage, and threaten to get your way." She looked at the new officers, waving a hand. "Hey, guys. Thor's at Avengers tower."

"Why does that matter?" one of the new one asked.

"They're his daddy's guards. They wanted his brother to kidnap him. Odin's kind of a dick."

They nodded, taking those two, though one asked her about the chemical restraint. She gave them the vial it had been stored in. That might help them so they left her alone. Darcy closed her door and locked it then called Jane on a video call. "So, Odin sent Einhenjar down to kidnap Loki." Jane sighed, looking at her. "Oh, I so am not amused. They tried to force their way in. I had to use the chemical restraint vial." She waved a hand with a smirk. "I told them where Thor is. By the way, his brother said that Thor asked him two days ago how to calm you down. His brother thought you two may still be dating."

Jane shook her head slowly. "No, we're not. Okay, I'll let him know that. Just two guards?"

"At the moment. They got arrested for trying to break in here."

"Great. Have a quieter night, Darcy." She looked. "No dress?"

"Already changed. It wasn't a bad date."

"That's great. You need more fun in your life." She looked to the side. "Let me tell the others."

"Have fun with that. If JARVIS wants to get the hall cameras he can do that I guess."

"Good point. Have a better night." She hung up with a groan, looking at Natasha and Pepper. "Odin's guards just tried to break in on Darcy thinking she was hiding his brother. Who said Thor asked him how to calm me down so he thought we were still dating. How do I handle this?"

Natasha sipped her cocktail. "Restraints and a bat?"

"I'd probably break the bat." She sighed as she sipped her own cocktail. She was fairly tipsy but not drunk. "JARVIS, did you get that film?" It was shown on her tv. "Those are Einhenjar."

"Who is that man?" Natasha asked.

"That is Loki, his brother. Kind of. Loki was apparently adopted and Odin was a dick to him too. Thor treats him like shit most of the time but considers them brothers. He's actually down here being a mayor. Darcy told him how to get world domination through politics instead of force." She finished her drink and put the glass down. "I have no idea of the full story about all that. It's a soap opera and it's stupidly annoying to watch."

"Is Darcy part of that?"

Jane looked at her. "I'm not going to answer questions for SHIELD to get nosy about Darcy, Natasha. They've already tried to kidnap her twice in the last few months." Natasha winced. "We'd all like SHIELD to disappear off the face of the earth." She smiled sweetly. "You can warn them I've boobytrapped everything they've stolen too."

Natasha nodded. "They have?"

"Yes. That's what happened in Ireland. Then they tried to blame me." She grinned. "So every file has a virus, or more than one, and each plan has fatal flaws on purpose. I've also noted in my last two articles going out that I didn't like SHIELD taking my things to sell to people who blew up things."

"They could have been HDYRA," Natasha offered.

"Same people, different masters?" Pepper guessed. "They've done it to Tony too."

Natasha nodded. "I was to get into his files to see what he was working on. I think he's forgiven me."

Pepper stared at her then sighed. "Natasha, he may have forgiven but he's not going to forget. You two should probably talk about that. Before it ends up getting someone hurt during a battle?"

"I should," she agreed. "He won't talk to me so I can start that talk."

"I'll have him settle down to do that in a few days." Pepper finished her drink and looked at Jane. "So that's his brother? The one he says is evil?"

"There's a lot of ...history there," Jane said. "Which I do not know. I know that he was adopted. I know that Thor talks about him fairly poorly a lot of the time. I know that he attacked Thor in New Mexico but I also know that Darcy saved his life because he was going to fall to his death instead of dealing with Thor and Odin. Is that a good thing? Probably not." Both women nodded. "I know she's talked to him about how to have a better life without being in the palace. Which is probably why Odin had him sent for."

"So Odin is not a pleasant ruler?" Natasha asked.

"No." She shook her head. "He's very dictator-like from what I know. Asgard claims the protection of all nine realms because they're the ones Odin conquered way back in history." She shifted. "I'm not a fan of Odin and he hates me."

"Would Darcy know more?" Natasha asked.

"No and if she heard I had said that much she's going to be mad at me."

The women nodded at that. "Where does Darcy come from?" Natasha asked.

"No idea. Honestly, no idea. I know she can't have daughters or she'll die." They both winced. "And if someone tries that, well, I'd pity their selves." She grinned at Natasha, who winced but nodded. "Something Odin's wife did cursed her apparently."

"That explains why she does not really tolerate Thor's moodiness."

"If we were happy, she'd let Thor be."

The others nodded, slotting that into the ideas about those two and Thor's problems.

Loki appeared, staring at Jane with a smirk. "She's going to kill you if that gets her harmed, Jane. Because the redheaded one's bosses will intentionally kill her that way." He looked at Natasha. "Both of them." She winced. "I would stop them while I go make sure Darcy does the birth control spells we developed." He looked at Jane then at Natasha again. "I will warn you once of this, Widowmaker. Darcy is a pleasant, sweet young woman who has to sometimes be protective.

"She will fight like any tigress and will win somehow. Even if it means she must take down a whole country. She did in a small area of Germany." He disappeared to go warn her that Jane had blabbed under surveillance. He did the spell, waking her up. "Your adult child is drunk and telling others things." She winced. "That redheaded agent will probably try to block it."

"I'm going then." She got up to pack things. He grinned and helped. "The farm's gone."

"Go to the one in England?" She nodded, calling the people who moved her. He brought her to the old house that she had bought off the fabric mill she had once worked in. The house was a wreck but she could handle that. He kissed her and winked then left.

She looked around then sighed and found the old broom in a corner. She could use it until she got hers from her apartment in a few weeks. They'd move it a few places before it got back to her. She did send out a message to the family that she was safe and out of harm's way. She'd talk to Jane in a few days she guessed.

She changed her number, her sim card, and her ISP address on her phone to make it harder to track her. SHIELD was going to need to come down. Maybe the grandson would like to help with that? That would probably look bad on his agency though. So maybe some press attention? Or a political movement? She could think while she swept the old floors.

***

Jane walked in the next morning and noticed the signs that Darcy had left. "Damn it!"

Pepper walked in a minute later. "Oh, she had to flee. Sorry, Jane." She patted her on the arm. "That's probably why there's a petition to move Thor off the planet?"

"No, that's not Darcy's style." She sighed. "This isn't good." She went to check things. "She's got the data backup. So that's safe at least."

"Any idea where she went?" Pepper asked. "Can she video commute maybe?"

Jane looked at her. "She loves me like a sister, Pepper, but she's not going to risk her life for me. Not with this going on. I need to help her erase all the videos and files." She sat down to email Darcy to see how she could help and apologize. No answer, it came back undeliverable. So she was truly gone out of this life to a new one.

Pepper left to talk to Natasha, who was not pleased. She was being chewed on over the phone. "Is that about how we talked to Jane and Darcy had to flee for her life?" she asked.

Natasha looked at her. "She did?"

"Completely."

"Well, SHIELD can fall I suppose," she said, hanging up. "Let's see if we can find and end the problems." She settled to hack SHIELD's files to end the ones on Lewis. They were all especially wrong so that was a good thing.

Thor was in the living room when Pepper walked past him looking smug. Pepper stared at him. He quit looking so smug. "I hope you're happy," she said quietly. "And that it lives by the three fold rule, Thor." She walked off again. She had to talk to Tony about getting Thor out of the tower sooner. Jane wasn't safe with Thor there and no guards on her. She assigned her a new helper to fuss at the machines for her through Stark. Tony was looking at the files he was purging for Jane. "Lewis?"

"Somewhere. That guy showed up to help her move."

"That was Loki apparently."

He looked at her. "Thor's brother?" She nodded. "Yeah, he's gotta go." He got up to make that arrangement. Thor had started all this stress, he had to go to end it. Thor was trying to talk to Jane so he walked in to get between them. "Hey, Shakespeare's Sister, leave Jane alone. You two broke up and if she's got sense she's not coming back since you treated her worse than a mistress." He looked back. "Jane, you good?"

"I was tipsy. I've apologized." She sighed, looking at him. "No I'm not. This could get Darcy killed." Thor snorted. Jane got up and hit him, making him yelp and back away from him. "I hate you," she sneered. "You hurt my family. I don't give a *damn* what you want, Thor. You're selfish and you're mean spirited. I deserve better than that in my life." She pointed. "Have a great day, Thor."

"You are mine, Jane."

"No I'm not. We broke up. We broke up weeks ago." Thor glared. She stared back. Thor pushed Tony and nope. Tony got in his way again. Jane's fists were balled up.

Loki appeared, shaking his head. "What a mess you've made of things, Thor." Thor spun to stare at him. "You have hurt Jane's adopted sister. You've tried to have me killed as I've found out." He stared at him. "You know she will tell everyone of this. About everything." Thor stomped off. Loki sighed, looking at Jane, who slumped, shaking her head.

"She realizes you were tipsy, chit. She is plotting. You can probably help her with that but from a distance as that would endanger her more." He looked at Stark, who was staring back. "When Darcy saved me that night she had me cast a foresight spell. So I could see what she had. We should show that off. We'll need water." He strolled off. "Let us find some we can stand in."

"I have a pool. JARVIS, get the others. Include Thor last." He followed with Jane and Pepper coming. He grabbed Banner, taking him with him. "C'mon."

The others gathered and Loki stared at one. "It will upset you, Archer. Though do know I was not in any more control than you would have been." He walked into the water once his pants were rolled up and his shoes removed. "Please."

They came down. Thor stomped in and huffed but joined in. "Shoes, Thor. That's rude. Your mother would be appalled." Thor got out to take off his shoes then came back. "We are going to scry the past so you can see what was foretold and stopped." He cast that spell, which was complicated. It brought them back to that night she had saved him on the roof of the former car dealership. He cast a second spell to show the portal that he had built for the foresight spell.

At the end, he canceled them both. He stared at Stark then at Thor. "Are you still proud?" He looked at Stark again, who was stiff. His jaw was set, his eyes were hard. "Now you know why. We are trying to stop things. We do not want that to happen. That one may still show up. I wouldn't have been the only one he tortured." The archer shifted. "The cube is still in the wind," he warned. Then he waved a hand and disappeared.

Thor huffed. "That cannot..."

Jane glared at him. "Yes, it was, Thor. We've seen hints of those."

Stark nodded, swallowing. "Yes. We have." He looked at the others. "Team meeting, living room, people. There's towels up there." He climbed out of the pool, going to make sure the AI had taped that. He was not pleased. He had misunderstood. He didn't like leaving things to others to handle so nothing got missed but he had dropped the ball. He faced off with the team, who were all staring back. "So, what do we do now? How much of that can still happen?"

"The purple being?" Natasha asked Thor, who shrugged.

"It is not in anything I have noted, Widowmaker." He looked at her. "I know not what Loki had planned with that move."

"I don't think your brother was doing more than protecting the girlfriend he's had for years," Natasha shot back. "How long have they been together?" Thor shrugged. "Wonderful." She looked at Steve, then at Stark and Jane. "Jane?"

"No clue. Over a decade since she told me he forgot about her for over a decade." She shifted. "She wouldn't tell me to protect both of us, Natasha."

"All right. Is there a way for that purple being to get here? Can anyone find Loki so we can get better answers?"

"He's a mayor in some small Eastern European country," Jane offered. "Darcy talked him into getting influence through politics instead."

"It's how most people seem to do it," Steve agreed casually, leaning back. "All right. That guy in the mask. Any idea where Barnes is?" They all stared at him. He nodded. "That was Bucky."

"That was HYDRA," Clint said. "Which figures."

Steve nodded. "We need to end that?"

"They think they have but if there's any left we've got to route them out. It may mean SHIELD finishes falling in," Stark said. "Not that I'm against that." He looked at the two agents then at Steve. "Before you ask, that AI thing, I'm checking the coding later without activating it. It needs an activation to start up and I'll make sure it can't."

"Just erase it?" Natasha asked.

"That'd be murder. Am I that way?"

"Let me have it," she ordered, staring at him. "I will magnetize it and destroy the hard drive. I have no idea what made him go that way when your others didn't."

"I teach them to learn. Apparently he ran into the shitty human epidemic." He nodded. "It's in the safe in the lab. I'll toss it at you later."

"Thank you. Just so we don't have to go there as well." She looked at Steve. "Now what do you have planned?"

"Apparently HYDRA. You?"

"Same," she said, looking at Clint, who nodded.

"Fury," he said. "Because he's the master planner behind a lot of the problems SHIELD caused. I know he's not HYDRA but he's been causing Lewis stress." He looked at Banner, who nodded he agreed. "You safe?" he asked.

"I hope so. Ross is an attack dog." He relaxed by force, rubbing his forehead. "Start back sooner. Who was that?"

"Loki," Natasha said. "Thor's adopted brother."

Bruce nodded. "Is he trustable as a resource?"

"No," Stark said with Thor overtop of him. "But he'll work in his own self-interest," Stark finished.

Bruce nodded. "So he was stopped from being tortured and used to attack us. He avoided being tortured by his family for being tortured. Yeah, I'm going to say that let's just create a whole new timeline." He stared at Thor. Who wouldn't look at him. Then at Jane. "Are you safe?"

"I don't know," she admitted. "SHIELD's been hunting my stuff since New Mexico. They've stolen some and sold it. Then they tried to blame me."

"I know how that goes. Had that done to my own work," Stark agreed. Banner nodded he had too. "Okay, so we're anti SHIELD. That's good to know." Clint and Natasha both nodded. Steve was grimacing. "Are there agents we can trust?"

"Yes," Jane said, sitting up. "Darcy has a contact in a small agency in England. He's sweet, she treats him like a grandson." She smiled at Stark. "They're small but she trusts him."

"Name?"

"No clue."

"The one who kissed her on the cheek in the park?" Natasha asked. Jane nodded. "We can look him up."

"They're in England but are multi-national."

She smiled. "I know them," Clint agreed at her look. "Yeah, that makes sense. She would trust *him*." He found his phone and pulled it out to call. "Ma'am," he said dryly. "Put me on with Hunter, I need a number over in England." His ex handed over the phone. "We need to talk to the handsome prick in UNCLE," he said quietly.

"Today. It's important. Move you and Bobbi out of there. HYDRA is still around and have plans. SHIELD may end up in embers so make a life plan." He hung up. He texted Coulson to gather a few people because they were trustworthy then go into hiding from SHIELD and HYDRA. "Think that one that took down that base was her son?" he asked them.

Natasha smiled. "I had that thought but I'm not sure." She looked at Jane, who shrugged. "Does she have children?"

"Sons. Thor's mom cursed her whole family to die when their daughters turned fifteen. Take out the women, take out the people."

"Interesting," Natasha said. "Good luck on that."

"I'm hoping she's here for a lot longer," Jane agreed. "Even if I can't see her again."

"So, her past?" Stark asked.

"She has other degrees, Stark."

"Figures." He sulked. "The weaving thing?"

"It was an important job that women were encouraged to do anyway," Jane told him. "It was one of the few jobs women could hold without permission or threats."

"That figures," Natasha agreed, nodding and looking at her hands to check her nails. "How long do you think it'll take, Clint?"

"Hours maybe. Maybe just travel time. Might depend on where he is and if he's working."

"If so, we can arrange to get him a dvd of that watching," Stark said, looking at Natasha, who nodded she could. "Anything else we need to plot right now beyond making sure Jane's safe?" Jane looked at him. "No, I need you safe. From everyone, Foster. Your work has enormous potential to create hell. We are not letting anyone steal it again." She grinned and nodded, looking outside again. "Bruce?"

"We need to do some housekeeping on the lab floors," he noted. "There's a few assistants that are sketchy. I thought Lewis might've been but didn't think she was hiding herself for her own safety." He rubbed his forehead again. "Look at the ones in chem, Stark."

"Gladly. Starting tonight." He looked around. "Rogers?"

"I'm getting Bucky one way or another. Romanoff, find him for me so I can go raid?"

"Of course." She went to do that from a free lab. Stark tossed her the hard drive after a few minutes. She let her programs run the data mining operations while she destroyed the hard drive completely. She had it blown up with a tiny explosive. That way no one could ever touch that one AI again.

***

Natasha walked into the concert's intermission hall, strolling around with a glass of champagne. She spotted her target, who was watching someone else. She casually strolled closer, staring at him. He quirked an eyebrow up as he sipped from his own glass. "May I help you, miss?" he asked quietly.

"Yes." She leaned closer to kiss him on the cheek, slipping that DVD into his pocket. "Tell her we're making it safer." She smiled at him slightly. "And Jane is pouty." She strolled on, going to find one of her other marks in there. She knew he was on the SHIELD high priority list for arms sales. She could get him tonight perhaps. She charmed him into walking off with her, and Clint had been her backup so he was waiting in a back hall to help her take his sedated self off.

The agent felt the weight in his pocket, figuring what it was. It was amusing how some agents still used DVD's instead of SD cards but they were not hackable. When his secondary target was taken off by that very well known agent, he got to be amused and it let him make a move on his primary target. They could wrap that up that night. When he got back to the hotel room after handing over their target to Waverly's backup team, he settled in to watch that DVD.

"Well, damn it," he said quietly. "No wonder." He considered contacting his grandmother but she was in hiding. There were only a few places she could be. He'd find her later to check on her. It really did explain a lot and he really had to deal with Thor soon for her. Or tell his uncles. They'd love to talk to Thor for their mother. He was amused that he had run into his grandfather without realizing it. He had been at the concert. His teammates were staring so he shrugged.

"Grandmother," he told one, who nodded at that. "We've cleared our infection from HYDRA already but a few other agencies haven't. We'll be seeing a lot of fleeing agents looking for jobs. Also, this is...a weird thing from another timeline or something. We need to analyze it to see what UNCLE's response will be." They made calls to agents they knew to check on them. A few would turn out to be HYDRA but they'd be taken out too.

***

That agent looked at the tired looking woman in front of him as he walked into the charming old cabin. "They tried to claim this for the railroad but somehow couldn't get near it."

"I've got a diversion up," she said with a grin. "Good morning to you too."

He leaned down to stare at her. "How right was that foresight portal?"

"Extremely. But saving your grandfather saved everyone." She sipped her coffee. "He didn't get to fall to the purple one Thanos. Which cut out a lot of other problems."

He straightened up, staring at her. "Is it still coming?" She shrugged. "Who would know?"

"Tall, blond, dumbass who's harassing his ex-girlfriend probably?" she asked with a point toward New York. "Maybe some of his contacts."

He sighed. "Should we worry?"

"If he shows up, you should try to go to another of the seven realms that're left, baby." She grinned. "I will be." He moaned. "That dark haired destructive one? That's Hela."

"Damn it." He sat down. "Saw myths of her."

"Hmm." She sipped her coffee again. "But we'll handle it as we must."

He nodded. "We always do." He looked around then at her. "They'd probably buy it if you sold it."

"Probably. I haven't really been able to keep up on the maintenance on it." She shrugged. "We'll see. I have no idea and this was just an intermediary."

"There's all those off the grid sorts," he offered with a smirk.

"I could go back to living like that. Though I still kill plants sometimes and I really hate chickens. Still." He laughed. "Seriously. And that's how they taught me where babies come from, explaining why my hens weren't producing eggs."

"That's sad," he said smugly. "At least you did learn better."

"Yeah. A lot later than that. He found the contraceptive spell so no daughters." She finished that cup of coffee. "You get followed?"

"No and the wire they demanded quit working about twenty miles back." She smirked at him for that. "Are you going to be all right?"

"Yeah. Probably." She nodded a bit. "I've survived this long and there's been no daughters. Nearly one but no."

"Spell failed?"

"The second kid would've been a mixed set of twins. I delivered stillborn due to measles." She got more coffee and sat down. "Want some?"

"No, I had mass produced and it left my mouth burned." He sighed, looking at her. "We could go back to one of the other realms."

"We could," she said with a nod. "Even if we could find the hereditary people, they probably wouldn't accept us. We've been down here too long."

"Probably. Are we like the Rom of Asgard?" She grinned and nodded. "I had that suspicion because of the jewelry styles." She got up to get her mother's journals, letting him see them. He carefully read them, frowning some. "That's interesting. Have the uncles?"

"Yeah, I let them all read them once they hit about sixteen. Peter got it a bit late."

He looked up. "If I have a daughter who has a daughter."

"Yes. It's passed on that way. Unfortunately. The last I heard from your grandfather, there were five women and seven sons left outside you boys."

He winced. "So even if I married a normal person..." She nodded, sipping her coffee. "So any daughter would need to have sons and those sons could have daughters who only had sons...." He made that note for himself.

"Are we thinking about a wife?"

"No," he said patiently, staring at her. "I have no intention to settle down, Grandmother."

"Me either. It just never seemed to happen." She shrugged. "At least you get to have some fun."

"You could come to us. We'd nurture your gifts and all your degrees."

"I only have three."

"Yes but one's chemistry, one's minor engineering, and one's political science."

"I think next time I might go for PR. Jane suggested network administration."

He stared at her oddly. "Well, you can hack," he muttered, making her smile. "What are we doing about the Asgardian threat?"

"He touches you boys and he's done for."

"They'll protest that he's a hero."

"Sometimes."

"Point. He can have us declared his people's enemies."

"He's tried. Odin would if he knew." She smirked a bit. "I've denied the urge a few times to show up there in full regalia and jewelry." He shuddered. "Oh, yes. Just to watch the shit fall apart. The one she cursed apparently left a curse of her own that Asgard would fall in, be completely destroyed."

He swallowed. "That's mean to the innocents."

"Which is why I haven't."

Loki appeared, staring at her. "How did you even learn of that?"

"I asked Sif." She smirked. "She and the three warriors showed up in New Mexico."

"I remember seeing them. I thought about kicking them like I had Jacob." He blinked a few times. "That would deny Hela her entrance."

She shrugged but grinned. "If I had it in me I'd make a nice semi-attached realm to farmstead on."

"None of us are that powerful and it's mythical, Darcy," Loki sighed.

"I know."

"Fine." He looked at his grandson. Then at Darcy again. "Are you all right?"

"Trying to figure out where to go from here."

"Well, I'll find you wherever," he said dryly, smirking at her.

"Can others use that?" the grandson asked dryly.

"It's magical. How many agents have magic?"

He looked up. "There's a new Sorcerer Supreme."

"He'd probably hate us too," Darcy quipped. "Pity. Don't know him and I don't get involved in his level of shit." The guys smiled at her. "Unless I have to." She finished that cup of coffee. "Breakfast, boys?"

"No thank you," Loki said. "I ate at home. They had a house fire last night I had to go make sure didn't spread so I was up at a charming three this morning." He sighed. He looked at his grandson.

"If you weren't chaos incarnate I'd suggest you come work for us too," he said dryly with a smirk. "You'd do great being an agent, Grandfather."

"Yes I would. Though that's a bit dangerous." He shifted and you could tell the thought excited him. "Do I really want a throne?"

"No," Darcy said, smiling at him. "Because that's even more work than being a mayor is."

"Good point." He kissed her, making her moan. "I should bring you to my town."

She smiled. "That would draw attention like it did in Geneva. I hate leaving the area very fast to get away from people who're mad at you."

"I know. The son said the same thing when he moved suddenly." He looked at the grandson.

"I'll be over when I retire. That way I can hide in plain sight." She kissed him on the forehead. "Thank you, Grandmother."

"Welcome, baby." She looked at Loki. "What would I be doing over there?"

"For all I care? Starting a new farm and taking up weaving again." She snorted, shaking her head. "You could. We do have some lovely farm land. You could easily get some sheep and goats to do that. Pull your full loom out, all that."

"That would draw attention."

"Not like they have a land database like the US and the UK does," the grandson said, staring at her. "It may be safer. Jacob's in the Alps. Peter and Antony are both in the US but may be leaving soon. Alphonse was in Canada but he said something about warrior monks driving him nuts so he was leaving the city before he got involved. He may be going to become a Mountie or something. And Linder is in Martinique. Hitting on a pretty beach loving woman."

"So grandbabies." He smiled at that. "There's only you and Peter's son the artist."

"Did you warn him about the curse?"

"Peter said he would."

"I'll make sure with Uncle Peter."

"Your father had avoided any other children somehow. No matter how often he's slept around," she said dryly. "I don't mind grandbabies."

"You could have another one," Loki offered, smiling at her. She stared back, frowning at him. "You could."

"I... really?"

"If you wanted, I would aid that." He stroked her cheek with his hand, grinning at him. "Especially if you were close enough for me to visit routinely. I've told them you're a distant cousin who was widowed when they caught me talking to the son. I excused him as a cousin."

She sighed. "He told me." He grinned at that. She sat down, staring up at Loki. "That is really weird."

"It possibly is. But if you wanted, I would gladly oblige."

"I've never realized how weird it was seeing your relatives try to talk about sex," Napoleon said dryly. "I always thought I was less uptight than that." He stood up, kissing his grandmother on the cheek. "I'll bring these back. Go farm near him. If I get a nephew, I'll be changing lives soon as well. Though I couldn't do a farm myself. Perhaps I'll go run an art gallery." He smirked as he walked off with the journals.

She looked at Loki. "Do you really want a sixth son?"

"I wasn't sure I wanted one son but it seems that I've missed out on things. I wish I hadn't." He stared at her. "We could work that out well enough together, Darcy."

"We could." She considered it. "Is now the right time?"

"The only birth control I can sense is the spells," he said smoothly, leaning down to kiss her deeply. She moaned into it. "We can let Fate decide."

"I think she hates me."

"She hates me more, Darcy." He winked and pulled her up, kissing her on the way to her bed. It was usually good between them. He could make sure of it this time. He had missed all the aggravations of fatherhood. Perhaps this time he wouldn't miss as many.

***

Epilogue: Six Months Later

***

Darcy looked up as her security system got a few people trying to come through her farm's lands, walking out to stare at the remaining ones. "Did you need something?" she asked politely.

The two men stared at her. "We were told an agent lived here?" one called.

"No, I'm not an agent." She pointed. "Nine miles to the west and up the hill. Past the river and up the hill."

They nodded. "Will our people be fine?"

"Probably. It was a sedative and EMP system that hit them." They grimaced. "Sorry but I'm very wary of visitors most of the time." She stroked over her pregnant stomach. "I don't need that stress, boys. Have some fun carrying them off though." She smiled and closed the door, resetting the system in case they came any closer. One did try and went down. The other one learned that lesson.

He called in that they were off-target and this one wanted some privacy. She looked out there. "Please do not get agents here. I'm not one, never was one, just want some privacy. I had to deal with agents recently and I hate it. I don't need that in my presently fragile state. Okay?" That one reported that. She sighed and cast at him, making him fall down.

She called the locals to come get them. The local village wasn't that far away. She was three hours from where Loki was mayor. He was actually enjoying it right now because there was some chaos of a new election and political intrigue. He was having a ball remembering how to do all that. Napoleon was at his new art gallery in Germany. So not that far away really.

The other boys were slowly leaving the US as they aged out of their lives. Only Antony was still there and he was being an idiot with his age. She'd enjoy having him going to Ireland next time. He'd send her great cheeses. She looked out when she heard the village officers, waving at them. "They wanted that agent guy. My trees ate them." They laughed but gathered them. "They came up the stream probably." She pointed. "The system said they parked by the bridge and came up."

"Thank you, Darcy," one called with a grin and a wave. "Are you well?"

"I'm six months pregnant."

He laughed and nodded. "My wife complained much about being pregnant too. Call us if you need things."

"Of course. You guys are the nicest people." They smiled and took her trash away for her. She closed the door, going out to the barn. She looked at her milk goat. "At least now I know why your kind scream when you're bred. Your kind used to make me fear for when a man got me," she told it as she milked her.

The goat nudged her but she just added some more things for her to munch on while being on the milking stand. She needed more fibrous vegetables. She was carrying twins. Darcy wasn't, she had one huge boy. "I don't remember being this heavy the last time," she told the goat. "It kinda sucks. I really need a backrub." She got done, fed the chickens and collected eggs, then went into the house to deal with the milk pasteurization and starting to make some cheese.

The goat went to frolic in the field. The chickens were inside the barn for now. It was a pretty day that was suddenly clouded by a ship coming in. She looked up and sighed. Her security system couldn't stop that. She could. She did something that sent two wrenches into their engines. That ship fell and went toward the village. She watched but it crashed outside, near the apple orchard up the stream. "Great, SHIELD is still around." She cleaned up, checked the security system, then went back to her homey things. She had all afternoon to weave something pretty to wear. Maybe she'd dye this one scarlet and put some gold embroidery on it, like old times.

The End.
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