School Trips for Future Old Ones.







Dawn leaned down to kiss Clint. "Where do you want him to go to school?"

"Here."

"Which one of us is quitting their jobs?" she asked with a smile.

"Somewhere good but not snooty? I like Callia's present school."

Dawn nodded. "Okay but it's going to cause some press attention on you." He quirked an eyebrow up. She smiled at him. "It will."

"That's fine if you must."

"Yeah, I think I must." She called someone. "Janice, Dawn Summers. You forgot someone on the list you're putting out. Look in your mail, dear." She did find an envelope from her and opened it. Then gasped. "I may hide it pretty well, but ..." She laughed. "Because I'm where I want to be, Janice. Where else would I want to be? My niece is there, and the other kids. I adore the Stark kids as much as my own. Pepper's like a sister and sometimes a motherly figure to me. No, I'd still be hiding it if it wasn't for us dealing with putting Philip in school. Frankly, we'd all love to have him home schooled but we don't want to hire someone to do so.

"I'd never use business contacts for a school admission. Who knows what they'd say beyond I'm perky and good at what I do? None of them would mention I speak six languages fluently, another eight good enough to sound like a long time resident, and four more enough to sound like a tourist, and read another three demon ones. None of them would say I'm ABD in a dual degree and have two masters." She checked her nails. "Exactly. Which is why I sent you that."

She smiled. "Because I got a bit pissed that they assumed I was just a humble assistant trying to move my child up the ladder of success. Thank you, Janice. No, just the one is great, dear. Thank you. Yes, I am being Stark subtle. Because that's the only thing they'd notice. Oh, that ranch you guys were dissing? I know it needs paint but we're more interested in the bloodlines than the paint at the moment. We're working on greatness. Painting comes later. Always apply the finishing touches later." She laughed. "Thanks for this favor, dear." She hung up and looked at Clint. "Which means I have to go to tea probably next week."

"With Pepper or without?"

"With. Just in case someone misunderstands." She grinned.

"Does that mean you're admitting to your alternate identity?" She handed over a news paper article in French. "I don't read that." He scanned it and found both her names. "Aww, they put it out there?"

"Yup, fuckers." She went into the kitchen to work on dinner. "Barley risotto?"

"Add veggies. They're growing again."

"Of course." She did that and he smiled at her deviousness.

"Does that mean that I'm going to have to answer questions about my son?"

"Maybe. I wasn't going to push that in anyone's face. Which one?"

"The really expensive one that he wanted to hug?"

"Okay. I liked that one and his education trust will more than pay for it for the next thirty years." She smiled at him and went back to cooking. Natasha came in looking pale. "Problems?"

"How did they get hold of your tax forms? Someone outside asked me."

"That was fast," Clint said.

Dawn smiled. "Janice is with Town and Country. Her sister is with Vogue." Clint moaned. "And her cousin is a gossip columnist." She kissed Natasha with a smile. "School stuff. They thought I was a humble assistant. Go pick out my outfit for tomorrow?"

"Gladly." She went to do that. Dawn was playing the wrong sort of game with this but she'd help so their son had a good education.

"There's been stories about *fundraising*?" Clint asked.

"Most schools would, yes." She smiled at him. "It's okay."

"Uh-huh."

"We can do that."

"And it's expected to be what?"

"Ten percent unless they're hunting for huge things."

"Of your income?"

"Of the tuition."

"Huh. That one was how much?"

"You had a headache during that part," she reminded him.

"I seem to feel it now." He got up to kiss her and cuddle her, watching her cook. This stuff was going to drive him nuts.

***

Dawn came out the next morning, smiling at the reporters. "You're messing up my prettiness."

"Dawn, when did you get that settlement from SHIELD?" one of them asked with a smile.

"I haven't gotten hardly any of it. I have been investing since about my second paycheck. My first one had to go to my work wardrobe and stuff I needed. I had a brilliant financial strategist who helped me invest and made me a great budget, which I still live by outside of the girls' expenses. They have their own budget with Philip." She smiled. "You guys didn't see it in Esquire, in Money? In the Times?" She smiled. "You guys thought I was a humble little assistant too, huh?" They all nodded. She shook her head with a smile. "I'm a smart one. That's how I paid for my own college." They groaned. She got into the cab. "We're going to Stark Tower please." He nodded, driving her off. Clint had the kids today since he wasn't on call. She paid and got out, heading inside.

"Smooth," Tony said from the head desk. "Like using last year's returns so they have to not consider the payout from SHIELD."

"They thought I was a nice, simple little secretary trying to jump Philip up the chain of success, Tony." He cackled, shaking his head. "Exactly." She sat down, smiling at the flowers. "Aww, the uppity mother fuckers who sneered because I'm with Clint and Natasha said I'm still an assistant and not worthy of them. I think that's the other way around. Especially since Philip's already multilingual." She tossed them out. Tony came out to get them and take them to one of the botanists. She loved flowers, even other people's. Dawn smiled. "Thanks, boss." She got to work, answering a few emails from contacts and one on her livejournal. They had no idea about anything. It proved she was subtle.

Pepper came down with her first cup of tea. "Nice."

"Thank you. Tea next week?"

"Hmm. Wearing the red?"

"The green or the blue, the one that's the color of Clint's eyes." Pepper smiled at that, going to check her desk. "Tony was just in there."

"I can tell. He sorted on me." She smiled at Dawn's back. She was very subtle usually. Clearly they had underestimated Dawn a lot.

***

Dawn smiled at the headmistress who had sent her flowers during the tea. "Headmistress." She shook her hand. "How is your school doing?"

"Are you still trying to find Philip a seat?"

"We still consider home schooling the best option but none of us have the time for that at the moment. If one of us would retire I'm sure we'd do that instead. It did do Callia so much good." She smiled. "Plus Philip adores his lessons with us. He's already very fluent in three languages thanks to us."

The headmistress stared at her. "There's no way you can play in our leagues, dear."

Dawn laughed. "Headmistress, I can buy and sell your school."

"Money isn't everything."

"True, but neither is breeding with all the tails that seem to appear every moon dark." The headmistress reared back and sneered. Dawn smiled sweetly. "Present company not included of course." She sipped her tea. "There you are, Pepper. Excuse me, Headmistress. Pepper, I've already fended off the advance of Mr. Willhelm who wanted me to be his new CFO."

"You'd do good in it," Pepper said, sitting down in her chair. "Callia fell at PT."

"Is she all right?" Dawn asked.

"She's fine. Tony was with her. Her back gave out and she's frustrated but not hurt. She'll cuddle when we get back there."

"We can head back," Dawn offered. "Or I can."

"We're almost out of time here." She smiled at the headmistress. "I thought about your school for Liz but we decided to home school all the children since Callia's turned out so well. It seems to work wonders for their attention spans."

Dawn nodded. "If one of us was home all the time we could do the same with Philip and the girls. Though Philip really did want a school where he could pet the horses until he was old enough to ride. He does so miss his pony in New Zealand." The headmistress huffed off. Dawn looked at Pepper, who smiled. Dawn grinned back. "You sure she's okay?"

"She's fine, Dawn. Frustrated. Had a fit at herself and her back," Pepper said quietly.

"I've had a few of those at my inner ear and dizziness problems." She finished her tea and looked at her email for a second then put it back into her bag. "Tony's having to leave early."

"Why?"

"The usual."

"Robots?"

"No. Not this time. Demons." She sighed. "I should help."

"You are in no shape to help," Pepper said, patting her on the hand. "You can help when you're not dizzy."

"And if that never happens?"

"Then you'll work on it." Dawn nodded, pouring Pepper some more tea and fixing it for her. "Thank you."

"Welcome." She stood up and curtseyed the woman coming to them. "Duchess."

"Miss Summers. Do you go by your maiden name?"

"For business things. Or Romanoff-Barton." She smiled. "Either works for me. I'm easy that way." The Duchess laughed and smiled at her. She pulled out a chair. "Sit with us?"

"Of course. That's why I came over." Dawn sat down after her. "How is your daughter doing, Pepper?"

"She just had a slight accident in PT and is swearing at her weakness today but last week one of her legs moved without her moving it."

"That's wonderful news. Progress is going even if it's slow."

"In things like this, you often have a few setbacks," Dawn said. "The same as in any training."

"That's true." She smiled at Dawn. "Those people are still insistent that you have the right to a title."

"Which I do not want."

"I can agree with that. If I had known then what I know now, I wouldn't have married my husband in the least." She stared at her. "School?" Dawn nodded, glancing over then back at her. "It's a hard thing. Have you thought about a private tutor?"

"Often." The duchess smiled. "Very often. If I wasn't working or one of the others wasn't working I'd gladly let them do it. As is, as soon as one of them gets injured in a long term way he'll be home schooled. Clint said so."

She smiled. "That's a wise thing. How old is he?"

"He's four in another week. He'll be starting next year."

"If you lived further out."

"I know but we need to be closer due to their jobs."

"Good point." She patted her on the hand. "Good luck."

"I tried to talk to Natasha about schooling two years ago. She didn't want to. Clint didn't want to."

"Hmm, now they know why. What of the girls?"

"Probably wherever their brother is if I like it."

"That's a good thing." She patted her again. "Good luck."

"Thank you, and I hope your daughter has a wonderful semester at college."

She smiled. "I hope she studies instead of parties." Dawn giggled and nodded that was true. "PhD?"

"My dissertation is on helping children learn to be multilingual in a society that doesn't appreciate it and the benefits of it."

"Like the children in Europe get?"

"Yes. We're very far behind their educational standards in a lot of ways. If children in Belgium can speak four languages naturally, why can't American children? It would help them no matter what they're doing. Even if it's construction it means they can get to know their coworkers better."

"That's a good point." She patted her on the hand and walked off to talk to others.

"When do you present?"

"Six weeks," Dawn said. "And I'm deathly afraid since the head of my board's wife is one of the sneering ones," she said quietly. "Rodney and Tony took my proofread copy to go over it. Rodney called it too soft of a soft science but he supposed education was a worthwhile topic for it. Tony agreed and fixed the few typos I had left. Rodney turned into a grammar mistress."

Pepper smiled. "It'll go okay. They have to decide on the merits of your work." Dawn gave her a look. "Okay, for the most part."

"I'm not sure if I want to ask for an unbiased panel due to me talking to his wife a few times about my son's schooling. That way it keeps any hint of impropriety."

"I'm sure he's run into that before."

Dawn nodded. "I've scheduled a talk with him about that. I'm not sure what he wants." She poured herself more tea and sipped it.

"That's really for businesswomen," one of the women in there sneered.

"That's great since I have over seventeen million in investments, mostly in medical technology and adaptive technology companies," Dawn said with a smile for her. The woman reached over to swat the cup from her. "Touch me. Watch me throw you across this room," she said quietly. "No one likes a bully, dear. Even I know that." She huffed off to complain.

Another one laughed. "I'm sure she wouldn't use that *magic* on you."

Dawn looked over. "She does know seven martial arts and she also has *excellent* hearing, madam." She stared at her. "If it upsets you that much, perhaps you should leave since you don't participate in business matters at all. Do you?" She finished her tea. The woman was gasping. "I did think this was for women in business. Which I do run. By the way, *dear*," she said, staring at the snotty one. "I also run sixteen farms. From the wine you were *gushing* about the other day to the cheese. You were at my partially owned restaurant's tasting party." She smiled. "Let's go, Pepper. The rarified air in here is a bit...stale."

"It is and we do have a company to run," Pepper agreed with a smile for her. "Sixteen? I thought there were twelve."

"I bought two recently. Both are produce and meat farms. The steaks that we brought over were from some. We were quality checking before we bought them. The others were the horse and sheep farms."

"They were really good steaks. Wagyu." Dawn smiled and nodded. "Good choices. I liked the white wine a lot with them. I'd usually have said the red but it was a bit robust for that delicate meat and the sauce with it went well with the white." They walked out and got into the limo, letting Happy drive them home. She looked at her. "They're so snotty. Why did we go to that?"

"You said so?" Dawn guessed.

"Good point. I clearly made a mistake." Dawn grinned. "Think they'll look down on you for that?"

"Nope. And if so, I'll work from home and teach him my own damn self." Pepper laughed.

***

Dawn looked at one of her dissertation board members. "Sir, do you have a moment?"

"I do, Miss Summers. Come in." She came in and shut the door and sat down, which he scowled at her for.

"Sir, I'm still dizzy from the concussion. I didn't think you wanted me to throw up on your desk."

"No I did not so I'll forgive you sitting down." He stared at her. "What is that important?"

"Your wife's job."

"Not this again," he sighed. "Did she turn your son down?"

"Before even meeting him but that's not what I'm here about. I'm worried her prejudice against me because oh my god I worked for my money and that's not *her* sort of people at *her* school will interfere with my defense."

He blinked at her. "That's ballsy."

"No, it's reality. Considering she sent a few people to sneer at me the other day at a business tea I have to consider that she would try to convince the people on my board. Why she was there I have no idea but she was and she was most rude. I don't want you to have a hint of impropriety that could get you looked at wrongly by the higher ups at the college."

He burst out laughing. "You have balls, Summers."

"I've been accused of that before. Unfortunately a spouse can bias a defense. As it has gotten two other members of my board in the past." He quit laughing and stared at her. "Which does worry me a bit. All I want is a fair shot at what I've earned. Without bias or snotty bitches telling people that I'm 'wrong' because I earned my money. Which, by the way, her grammar? You should've proofread her letter to the editor today." She handed it over.

He read it over. "She didn't mention you by name."

"No, she didn't." She smiled. "Because I would've sued her. Not like I don't run businesses as well as be the perky super assistant sort." He gaped. "I wisely invested in some food and production farms with my past earnings. They're doing fairly well. Apparently me earning my money is wrong to her. And I don't want that to hinder my board. I'm not asking you to recuse yourself, I'm asking if you think there is a problem."

"Probably not," he said firmly, staring at her. "You really do have nerve."

"Sometimes." She stared back. "I'm not doing this to alienate you, sir. I just want a fair shot and I'm not sure if you and the other two in the same situation are going to give it to me. I can fight uneven odds but I'm also aware that I can have it taped and I will be requesting it."

"You think it's necessary?"

She pulled out her tablet, flipping open a tab once it was back on. She held it up. "Look like some familiar names? They printed them in the Times last week." He took it to look at, growling some. "Which is a problem I don't really want to deal with. At least I have some expectation that you're nominally unbiased thanks to your wife. What about them?"

"I'd say we would give you a fair shot, Summers." He looked at her. "We can change your board. That means you get Dr. Crumshires."

"That's fine. I took him for three classes, Professor." She stood up, forcing down the nausea. "When should I hand them copies of my dissertation?"

"Is it done?"

"I'm doing a final proofread this week. I've had a few others look it over for grammar and missed links."

"You type that fast?"

"I had a few free weeks in there while trying to heal from the concussion," she said dryly. "Not much else to do when moving makes you dizzy. For a few days moving my fingers was the only thing that didn't make me dizzy."

"I've seen concussions before."

"I'm glad I didn't get the double vision," she admitted. "No matter how worried the neurologist was about that."

"If you have it done, we can move you up. That would mean we'd have to get someone from another language."

"That's fine. I speak a number of them." He shook his head, calling over there. She held up a USB key. "Want it in digital format or should I drop it off tomorrow? I'm having the paper copies bound today."

"Bound?"

"Wire binding, as protocol demands. The one at the office is broken so I had to go to a print shop. I'm picking it up on the way home."

"Make sure you have ten copies." She nodded. "Hand them in tomorrow."

"Yes, sir. Thank you for being so understanding, Professor." She left, going to pick them up and take them home.

The professor called his wife. "Why did you piss off one of my doctoral candidates?" He listened. "Yes, that one. Yes, she does. Melon, she didn't get the settlement until this last tax time. That's before that settlement. I've seen her finance paperwork. No, I'm not going to and she was wise to ask me to remove myself. Usually my students ask me to talk to you to get their kids into the school. Now I can see why she didn't want him there." He hung up and called the new board together. "We have to change a board."

Crumshires smirked. "Summers." A few glared at him for mentioning her name.

"Yes. Because my wife is a total bitch about her son trying to attend her school. Three of them were part of a noted protest at her workplace and against her relationship." He stared at them. "Quit disgracing the department." They huffed off. "Crumshires, pick someone from languages. Hers is a dual. She'll drop off copies tomorrow."

"So soon?"

"She said she typed it up while she had a concussion."

"I heard about that." He went to pick a friend over there. He'd let her impress him. She had good grades and her past papers had practical points. It was definitely real world instead of fantasy education worlds. Which he liked.

***

Dawn walked the box off the elevator and to the workspace Clint had, kissing him before putting it into his explosives safe. It was empty and cleaned up so no residue was there. She locked it in and smiled at him. "Dissertation."

"Can I read it?"

"Later. I need ten clean copies for them and there's only twelve."

He kissed her with a grin. "I can wait." She grinned and went to change. He got back to fixing a few new arrowheads. "Can we attend the defense?"

"No. Sorry."

"Fine. Is Stark going?"

"Only if he wants to be paddled."

"Okay." He smiled, texting that to Bruce. He said he'd help her prepare.

***

Dawn faced her board a short week later. "Thank you for agreeing to the changes."

"Don't you worry," one of them said with a heavy drawl.

"Professor Crumshires, I've had you for three classes. The last I knew you were British," she said bluntly.

He laughed. "In person?"

"Yes, they were." He smirked at her. She smiled back, looking harmless. "I mostly enjoyed it until you messed up the translation on the demon language."

"Ah, that was you." She nodded. "How well do you know that one?"

"Well enough to converse with people in it. I do so a lot. Including once during a business meeting when I had to translate because one of the lawyers for the other side spoke it and he was misunderstanding English or any other language we used."

"Good." He stared at her. "So, impress us, Summers."

"Is that your name?" one asked.

"I have all my records under Summers-Romanoff-Barton, which is officially my name. For business matters, I tend to go by Summers."

"Huh." He made note of that. "I wondered about that on your forms. That's not legal, correct?"

"It is. We had it changed."

"Oh." He made note of that as well. She smiled. "You were late?"

"My heel fell off. The new shoes I had made are not the quality I expected for the price I paid for them."

"Are you a bimbo?" Crumshires asked.

"Only to some stupid people. Even geniuses can turn their ankle and have their shoes fall apart, sir. For that matter, I was here, just up the hall icing my ankle in a place that no one was going to look up my skirt."

He nodded. "You're not scared."

"I've faced down rebel groups that wanted to kill me. You're not quite that bad." She smiled. "And given demonstrations to foreign presidents."

"Good point. Get on with it." She went into her defense speech. She had slides that were working well. Including one that was colored on. She flipped past with a head shake and went on with her presentation.

Crumshires looked at her. "You've used this on your son?"

"That as well. His mother speaks Russian. I speak it as well. His father speaks some. We exposed him to all of them but focused on certain ones that are more prevalent in our lives. I did test these methods on him and the local daycare. My niece had to take a language class and is taking Greek. For her needed community service hours she's teaching it to the children in the daycare at work. She and I went over this method versus how she's presently learning it." She switched to that slide. "We used a basic level flashcard test since half the children in there are too young to read. It covered all but the last two lesson's material. That way we could weed out a recent memory bias to the results. They were given by another scientist so it wasn't one of us and them being cute with us." She smiled. "That one was another of the parents but she was not taking the lessons with the children and we taped it to make sure she didn't bias them by prompting answers."

The committee nodded when she played the video for them. "That's not a bad method for children. What other methods have you tried with your own children?"

"My son's almost four. So far it's been the basics through workbooks, usually ones that use association methods. He responds well to them. We taught him colors by the laundry method. We taught him to sort by practical methods. So far his language education has been a smattering of us using it around him and him picking it up, Dora and similar programs, and me sitting down to work with him." She switched to that lesson video. Philip was happily chirping things back at her as she associated them for him. She turned it off and smiled. "He's now partially multilingual, in line with his age group and a bit beyond. We've been working on more complex food, movement, and activity words." She showed them that video.

Crumshires nodded. "That's a neat trick. He remembers them?" She put up a different video, which was dated two days ago. He was reciting what the words she asked about were while his father stared at him oddly in the background. He smirked at her. "Impressive."

"Thank you, Dr. Crumshires."

"Why did you have your board changed?" one asked.

"Because my advisor's wife has started on a smear campaign to make sure my son doesn't go to a good school because I'm not *her* sort," she said dryly. "I made the point that I didn't want bias. Just to have a fair shot. Between that and three of them having been noted at protests that were very anti-my husband and wife's job, I didn't think I'd get it. As is I had to take one of them to the Dean once because he misgraded my test on purpose." Crumshires winced at that reminder. He had been dragged into it to regrade it. "As he saw."

"He did. He admitted he did it on purpose and I'm not sure how he has tenure." He looked at her. "That took balls."

"I've heard that recently but sometimes you have to be a bit pushy to get a fair shot. I frankly wouldn't have cared who did my board as long as they were giving me a fair shot. Even though I know you hate me because I corrected your pronunciation twice in the same class." He smirked and nodded. "You did get it wrong."

"You proved that point, Summers."

"I don't speak up unless I have a point I can prove, Dr. Crumshires. I'm not some reactionary little bimbette. I earned my degrees. I'm hoping I earn this one."

"It's impressive work," he said. "But most of us hate you."

She smiled. "Failing me for that reason just keeps me around and makes me more stubborn," she said. "Then I'll get to try again and again and again until I finally make it. All the while being in the department taking more classes."

"We can ban you," he offered.

She shrugged. "Then I'll go to Finance. Not like I don't have a good working knowledge of that field. That's possibly my next one if I don't take some medic classes just in case they're necessary."

He blinked at her. "You really do have balls."

"Sometimes I wonder but I've never put on the illusion choker that could change my form and shape to give me real ones. I only guard it and sometimes use it to confuse my husband so he gets a naughty thrill."

His mouth flopped open and then he burst out laughing. "That's good to know. How strong is it?"

"One in another realm belongs to a Xander. He's not godly like ours but he's a world class thief and gunman. Due to that choker and a fertility spell by Janus, he had two sets of twins and a single." He groaned. She smiled. "I'm guarding it."

"Good!"

She smiled. "In his life it's really handy."

"I'm sure it is." He stared at her. "We have to decide."

"I await your decision, professors." She nodded and gathered her laptop to go wait in the hallway. Usually you heard within a few hours. She relaxed and texted Pepper that she was waiting to hear. Pepper sent her an SOS so she worked on that acquisition contract while she waited. She looked over as the door opened, saving her work and shutting her computer to walk in.

"Summers, we found your work impressive," one of the other professors said. She nodded. "Though we're debating if you're ready."

"Ready for what, Professor Rothschild."

"To teach."

"I have no interest in teaching beyond my children and Mr. Stark's children. Or any children that we may take in. My focus has always been languages. I was talked into taking the teaching of languages by the late Professor Morton."

"That makes sense." She looked at the others. "You demonstrated a good feel for both fields. Very field work and practical oriented." She nodded. "We feel that you have not totally proved your point however."

"Where did you think I failed so I can look into that matter?" She clamped down on Clint's swearing in the back of her head.

"Actually, a few of us think you should have stuck with business."

Dawn shrugged. "I'm sorry they feel that way. I like languages. It's my area of genius. I'm just really good at business things."

"I can see that point." She stared at her. "We feel you have proved a few things. Including that you are quite stubborn." She nodded. "We also think that you're doing work that is not suitable to this institution."

"My dissertation was that bad?" she asked.

"They hate your spouses," Crumshires said bluntly.

Dawn nodded. "I didn't know that an education depended on who you married and loved. I'm sorry they feel that way. I don't think it's going to change anything in my life however." She looked at that professor.

"They won't give you a PhD here ever, Dawn."

"According to who, ma'am? The same professor that his wife was trying to impact?" She got sneered at. She stared back. "I'm aware that people don't like me personally for having gifts I use when I feel they're necessary to use. For multiple reasons. I'm aware of the people who hate my spouses for who they are and what they do. I personally do not care about anyone's bias until and unless it impacts my life."

"There's no tape," she said smugly.

Dawn pointed at the one behind her. "That camera?" She looked and blanched. "They started that second camera immediately because there was an allegation by another student, who has a parent within SHIELD and one in the FBI that they were not given fair hearings. They send that information out in a memo to all PhD candidates so we're aware of our rights to have things taped."

"I doubt that one has one."

"That one's a digital camera, ma'am. It tapes off-site." The woman went pale. She looked at Crumshires. "Is that the feeling of the whole board?"

"No, it's not. She and two others are highly against you ever getting any education ever again."

"I've never known anyone who could stop me from reading a book. So I guess they've failed."

He smirked at her. "However." He glared at them. They shrank down. "The review panel is still meeting." Dawn tipped her head at that. "Are you all right?"

"The anti-nausea medicine is starting to wear out." She shrugged. "It happens to me now and then." She calmed herself and looked at him. "When should I hear?"

"Within twenty minutes."

The Dean of the graduate college came out. "No, we're done. Dawn, we accepted it." She smiled at him. "You were right to push for a fair hearing and you got one."

"Thank you, sir."

"Are you walking?"

"Yes. I haven't really gotten to walk any of mine due to other things going on. I think it's time I walked a college degree."

He smiled. "Are you going for a higher business degree?"

"I don't know. The doctors in our infirmary wanted Clint, Natasha, and I to take medic classes in case it became necessary. I might do that next."

He nodded, shaking her hand. "Congratulations."

"Thank you, sir." She smiled and hugged her laptop. "Dr. Crumshires, I look forward to having you hood me? Or whatever we do as PhD's?"

"I accept." She smiled and left. He looked at the members of his board. "That's why I asked for the dual hearing." Those ones got up to stomp off. "Thank you."

"She earned it. Or else I wouldn't have. You know I have no patience for whiners and she wasn't. She proved her point and her case." He walked off. Hopefully Dawn would go to a different school for any future degrees.

***

Dawn walked in and found Pepper pulling out her hair. "I'm almost done."

"I needed it thirty minutes ago."

"I got interrupted by biased people and then the actual panel had to rule." Pepper stared, mouth open. "They accepted it," she said. Pepper squealed and hugged her. Dawn hugged back. "Let me finish this." She settled on the couch in there to finish typing it up. It let her put her feet up since one was swelling after her turned ankle. Pepper noticed. "Heel broke."

"That person needs to pay you back for all those."

"They're good beyond that and I'm having all the others tested, Pepper." She nodded. "Most of the other ones made grandma looking shoes." She got back to work, finding that she had been mistyping for half a page. She went back to redo it. She let Pepper proofread it and nodded, sending it over within the deadline. "Linda?"

"Has no idea," Pepper sighed. "I asked and she said she had no idea how to format those."

Dawn nodded. "I can show her." Pepper smiled. "Clint owes me dinner." She thought at him and calmed him down, showing him what had happened after she had shut them out. That calmed Natasha down as well. Neither one was in the mood to go beat someone to death. Then Dawn told them they needed a dinner out. Natasha said Joyce was busy. So was Bruce. He was having an angry day. Dawn got up and went to find him, walking into his lab. "What went wrong?"

He flinched and stared at her. "I'm not good company, Dawn."

She stared at him. "That's why I asked." He blinked at her. "What went wrong?"

"I... It's like a pile of things that just suddenly got uncovered in the back of my mind."

"Since when have we had telepaths on this realm?" He stared at her. She nodded. "Sounds like it." She wove a protection around him and he growled. She looked at him. "Don't." He flinched back. "Okay, Stepdad." He shook his head and walked off. "Hell, if I get another concussion maybe it'll fix the dizziness I still have." She watched him pace. She checked, the spell was in place. On a hunch she typed into his computer at JARVIS. Who sent back a positive. "Huh. Someone's testing pheromones." He paused to stare at her. She showed him. "I'd suggest calming down before you see Mom," she said quietly. "I'm not sure if Mom can handle that."

"I'd never, Dawn."

"I know." She grinned. "That's the great thing about you. Even though you have great rage monster problems, you've never once let them hurt the family." She patted him on the arm and that's when the Hulk came up. She blinked at him. "Hi, Stepdad." She waved. He growled. She stared at him. "Calm down. Please?" He growled and balled up a fist. "You hit me and I'm going to send you to Saturn." He lunged and she moved. She concentrated. "JARVIS, I need a containment shield down here please," she said quietly and calmly. "Whatever bullshit they were feeding him has gone a bit too far."

"Pretty girl," Hulk sneered. "Get smashed."

"No, I'm not." He lunged and she teleported, holding her head. "Okay," she said, blocking his path. He threw the chair. It was backing her into a corner. She saw Tony in the doorway and teleported. That let Tony put up the containment shield. She sighed, leaning on the wall. "I touched his arm."

"It has to be whatever whoever was pumping in."

"Can we find them and beat them?"

"Yup. I'm going to. Then make sure he doesn't blame himself."

Dawn looked in there. "He's going to get free."

"The sedative's not going to work with him hyped that way."

"Blow up doll?"

Tony gave her an odd look. "Why?"

"Have you ever seen the Hulk get hard?" she pointed out with a point at him. Tony looked and shook his head. "JARVIS, send Stepdad to the clearest gym and clear it."

"Callia's in the yoga room alone. It will take a minute to get her moving."

Tony hurried off to get his daughter out of harm's way. Dawn stayed there to make him focus on her instead of getting free. It was scary but she could handle Bruce and get away from the Hulk if she had to. Which she would have to because he broke a wall. He was beamed and Dawn put up more shields around his work area then headed down there. Tony hadn't gotten there in time. Callia was scared and sniffly. The Hulk was fighting with himself. Dawn got between them so Tony could move her. Hulk roared and rushed her. She teleported off. She held her head. "I don't think the celebration dinner's going to be tonight." She sent that at them before going to get sick. Tony had it, he could handle it. He could beat whoever started that.

Callia finally let all the anger out. "WHO IN THE FUCKING HELL DOSED MY GOD DAMN GRANDFATHER WITH SOMETHING!" she shouted. It nicely carried over the intercom. "BECAUSE I WANT TO TALK TO YOU, BITCH!" Then suddenly she and her wheelchair weren't there.

"I sometimes forget my daughter has magic," Tony said. He looked up. "JARVIS, where is she?"

"She is presently pummeling the person who is most likely responsible. With your son, sir."

"Great. Where?"

"Lab six."

He looked at the Hulk. Then around that gym. "You know what, take Dawn's cure. Jonathan's giving up his kevlar impregnated sex doll." The AI just sent it in there. The Hulk roared and tried to rip it up. "Make one with life sounds? Put Joyce's biorhythms into it. Send it in once it's done." He stopped Joyce and Steve as they came off the elevator. "No. Someone filled his lab with aggressive in heat sort of pheromones." He saw the flash and the Hulk let out a pleased yell. "We gave him a sex toy, Joyce. Give him time to be embarrassed and calm down." He walked off. "Let me go stop my daughter from ripping up a biochemist with bad ideas to teach her little brother how to punch. Dawn's vomiting again." He went up to lab six.

One of the other scientists was nibbling on some microwave popcorn. "For being in a chair, she has a great swing, Stark."

Tony watched and nodded. "We did a great job teaching her and clearly she's been teaching her baby brother." He walked in there to haul Chris off. "Out in the hallway."

"Hell no," Callia snarled. "My grandfather is not a damn science experiment!"

"He'd agree with me doing it!" the researcher shouted. She was crying through all the snot and blood.

"I doubt he would've agreed to participate since it nearly made him rape my aunt and me. Thankfully I'm still small enough that he hesitated." She hit her again then moved back. "Get out of my company."

"You're not...."

Tony pointed. "We're going to be talking first but I think it might be a really good idea." He hauled her up and down to the infirmary to treat her. He'd talk to his daughter later, make sure she was okay. Natasha walked in looking nicely dressed. "She did tell you that you didn't have a sitter, right?"

"She did. I'm on my way to meet an old friend at the bar to get some information. We were going to do her celebration dinner tomorrow night." She found Dawn, helping her up. "Are you all right?"

"I know Bruce isn't like that and I'm pretty sure he's going to be horrified afterward." She hugged her. "Have fun with Brenda."

"I shall." She tipped her chin up. "We are very proud but your children are pouty."

"Is Mira pouty too?"

"She is very much your daughter most of the time. She's been complaining at me all day long." Dawn smiled and kissed her on the cheek then went to see what had happened so she could go home. Pepper was worried and a bit pouty since they hadn't won the bidding. "Sorry."

"No, it's okay. These things happen." She smiled. "Are you better?"

"Slightly. Stepdad's still in a hormone induced rage thanks to whoever."

"Callia beat her with Chris." She pointed at the kid in the corner. "I'm waiting to see what happened."

"I'm wondering what happened too," Dawn said. She looked at Chris. "Got an explanation?"

"She fumed him on purpose because he's not normal and she thinks he wouldn't mind."

"I think he'll Hulk up again to beat her ass himself," Dawn said dryly. "If Mom leaves her living."

Chris looked at her. "Grandma?"

Dawn smiled and nodded. "Where do you think I get it from?"

"Wow. I didn't know that about Grandma." Pepper pointed so he turned back around with a sigh. "Callia not in corner."

"She will be when I find her ass," Pepper assured him. Tony walked in with a police officer. "Is she charging Callia?"

"Nope. The officer is here to take Miss Bad Science away." He put down the forms. "Need your signature relieving her of her grant as well." She looked at it and signed it. "Thanks." He handed it to the officer with a grin.

"Is the Hulk contained?" the officer asked. "Or should we try to evacuate the other tower?"

"They fumed him with sex hormones," Dawn said quietly. "He's locked in an area with a surrogate that sounds like Mom." The officer shuddered. "Then we'll calm him down afterward."

"I'd be upset too." He went to finish the arrest once the infirmary had her stitched up. Callia had been a mean little girl.

Joyce Summers walked into the infirmary. "I want her charged with trying to make my husband rape Dawn and Callia, because he was very close to it and both girls managed to get out of harm's way, and the rest of the people in this building. Because he has no control at the moment."

The officer nodded, adding that to the sheet. "I'll talk to the DA personally, Mrs. Banner."

"Thank you." She glared at the woman, who shrank away from her. "I'd think you should probably beg. Callia's not the one to worry about here." She walked off.

"You probably like it like that anyway," she sneered.

Joyce paused to stare at her. "No. He gives great cuddles in Hulk form but I'm not like you. I'm not that deviant." The woman flinched. Joyce walked off. Bruce was starting to calm down but Steve wouldn't let her in there. Not until he was mostly changed back. She walked in and he flinched, backing away from her. "Shh. The bitch who did it is going to jail."

"Don't come near me yet, Joyce. I'm... I'm not calm."

"I know." She sat across from him. "She dosed you on purpose because she decided you were a great experiment." He growled. "She just slung at me that I probably liked it like that anyway." That got a deeper growl. "Everyone's okay. You didn't hurt anyone but I had them add the charge of attempting to make you rape every single person in this tower."

"I saw Callia," he said, swallowing hard. He got up to be sick in the corner. He waved her off. "No!"

"Bruce, you didn't really think about her. You saw how tiny she was, how helpless, and you stopped yourself from even trying. No matter how much your primitive brain might've yelled, you stopped yourself and Dawn led you away from her before your primitive side could overrule you." He stared at her. "Really."

He sat down against that wall. "I knew I was a monster."

"You are not. Most men would've reacted. You just had a stronger one thanks to him." He snorted, banging his head against the wall. He looked around and spotted the doll, shaking his head. "Tony's idea."

"It was a good one. It probably saved a whole bunch of people." She started to move. "Please don't."

She got up and came over, sitting in front of him. "It was not your fault."

"I've never lost control like that."

"Well, now you know how college kids feel when they wake up somewhere they didn't expect to be." He glared. She smiled. "You did."

"Slightly."

"It was not your fault."

"I should have better control."

"How? Even Natasha would've reacted to that. Or Steve." Steve nodded from the doorway. "She pumped it into your lab on purpose. To see what you would do. She's a science bimbo."

"She is." He rubbed his hands over his face. "I need better control."

"Then let me find Oz and see if the werewolf transformation meditations will help." He stared at her. "There's a temple in Tibet that teaches werewolves how to transform at will instead of at the mercy of the moon. They don't have to transform at all."

"I... I might like that."

"I'll see if I can get hold of Oz tonight." She reached over but he shook his head. "Bruce, you didn't do anything."

"Tell that to the doll."

"Bruce, think for a second," Steve said quietly. "If you were fully out of control, without any higher brain functions, do you think that doll would be in that good of shape? Even if you didn't have conscious control you still stopped yourself. You stopped yourself from hurting Callia. You hesitated long enough that Dawn was able to appear and distract you." Bruce stared at him. "Even if it was just the skin of your toenails you had enough to keep yourself from breaking out of here to cause real harm." Bruce shuddered but nodded. "I'll call around, see if we can find Oz."

Xander appeared, staring at Bruce. "Oz is coming this way. I already talked to him." Bruce nodded, looking down. Xander tipped his face up. "I have seen warriors lost in the middle of the battle, reacting to the battle heat. The most gentle men ever but the fire in their blood won and they did horrible things. They went looking for ways to feed that fire they were under the spell of. You did not." Bruce shuddered but nodded. "For that matter, you weren't trying real hard. Dawn only teleported away from you and you've caught her before when she did that."

"That's good." He looked at him. "I need to meditate."

"Of course you do," Joyce said. He avoided her touching him and she understood why. "Bruce, you're no more of a monster than you were yesterday, which is not at all."

"I can't feel that way, Joyce."

She smiled. "Then it's good that I have enough faith for both of us." He nodded. "C'mon. We can let you hide in your basement at home."

Tony leaned in. "Joyce, we need to put a monitor on him to make sure it's all out of his system." She glared. "Looking at her notes it was an extended release version." Bruce groaned. "Bruce, she pumped so much in it was bad. It spread it was so bad. The boys both pounced their wives in front of the kids. Thankfully Caro got them moved. Ten percent of the air in your lab was contaminated by her chemical mixture."

"Ten percent?" Steve demanded. "Shouldn't that have killed him?"

"If it wasn't for the Hulk, yes," Tony said bluntly. "She had also fiddled with the nitrogen ratio on the filters." Bruce stared at him. "She did it on purpose and swore up and down she'd prove you were a scientific nightmare brought to life. Even that asshole DA is agreeing to charge her heavily. Including the attempted raping and killing of every single man, woman, and child in this building." Bruce exhaled. "So we need to get you to a better room to meditate in. One where you've got proper air. Unfiltered air. Somewhere quiet you can calm down and check yourself over." Bruce nodded. Tony came in to help him up then Joyce up. "Joyce, do you want to sit vigil in the room where we'd usually stay to monitor him?"

"Please. I know it wasn't him, Tony."

He grinned. "We know too. Bruce is a great guy or else I wouldn't let him near the kids." He walked him down there to the observation chamber. He flipped off the switches on the wall. "Okay, you're not on an alarm. You're not on filtered or enhanced air." He looked at him. "Heart pads?" Bruce stuck some on and the EEG pads too. "Okay." Tony put it on the wireless setting for him so he could pace or sit in the corner. "The only alarm that should go off is 'we're being attacked by morons' or your heartbeat is so far out of whack. I'm putting it on the silence setting." He did that and looked at Bruce. "Want dinner? A drink?"

"I could use some water."

"Okay." He pointed. "Urinal but it'll have to do, buddy." Bruce nodded. "I won't ask for samples. I've got plenty of hers to go over." He patted him on the arm without hesitation. Bruce stared at him. "Chris got exposed and he got hard too," he said quietly. "He's nowhere physically capable of that."

"I.... I'm going to work on my anger at her."

"Good. You should be mad at her and not yourself. If you had went full on primitive Hulk, Dawn would've been a painful greasy spot and so would Callia because we moved you before she could have gotten out of there. You stopped yourself. We're all really thankful that you stopped yourself."

"It helps. Not a lot but it helps."

Tony nodded. "Someone fed me acid and I realized I was collecting knives before I started to come down. A few minutes later and the whole party I was at would've been a bloodbath," he said very quietly. "Not quite the same but yeah, I get the point."

"Can you tell her...."

"No. I can't tell Joyce she can't touch you to comfort you. It'd be futile and I'd look horrible with the black eye. I hid from Pepper for three days because she kept asking what had happened and trying to touch me. She finally gassed me and tied me to the bed so I would talk to her. She thought I was mad at her for something and she cried a bit but then she calmed me down, helped me ground myself again. Remember, every good meditation has a focus and a grounding point. That's why I made the doll sound like her."

"It helped," he said quietly.

"Good. Let me send in something to drink and some soup." He called that in and the nurse brought it in. "Let Bruce meditate. If the short redheaded guy shows up, he's allowed in but no one else. Even Callia or Chris."

She nodded. "Okay." They closed the door but didn't lock him in there. Bruce locked it instead. She got Joyce a more comfortable chair and dinner. She'd be there for a while helping him. She'd wonder but she had heard them talking in the infirmary over that nasty little woman who had gotten beaten by Callia.

***

Dawn showed up the next day after the meeting with the headmistress of last resort. She wasn't going to deal with it. She'd put Philip with a personal tutor first. It had went well. She hoped he would get in. The woman had noted that she knew she was the last resort and why. Dawn had corrected her assumptions too, making her look horrified. Dawn had been brutally honest that she didn't really prefer their school because Philip was already doing some of the second grade work. They had gotten him in to test him and he was above average for their grade levels. It was expensive but a necessary evil. Really she'd be paying about that much for a tutor per year. She ran into Clint. "How's Stepdad?"

"Still keeping calm. Oz showed up right before breakfast so he's leading him through them. Hulk likes Oz's wolf." He looked at her. "Did you insult her?"

"No, we were honest with each other. Including me correcting her assumptions that Philip had an educational trust from Stark. They did ask for tax returns so I handed the last five years over. She was amused that no one knew. Then she asked about the settlement. I pointed out I had only gotten the first payment recently. She was horrified but they're considering. If not, I'm hiring a tutor. It'd be the same cost. He's doing second grade work for most everything but geography. It's not worth the stress to keep this going."

"Sure." He hugged her. "Calm down." She sniffled but did calm down.

Pepper came up the hallway. "Dawn...." She paused. "Go that badly?"

"This is the last one or I'm hiring someone," she said, looking at Pepper. "Did I do what?"

"The Henderson file."

"What Henderson file?"

"I told you about it yesterday."

Dawn shook her head slowly. "No. I was gone most of yesterday, Pepper." Pepper stared, blinking hard. "One of us clearly has short term memory loss. I'm hoping it's me. Yesterday was my defense, right?" Pepper gave her a dirty look. "With the concussion it's not unheard of."

"Yes, yesterday was your defense. I told you about it while you were working on that one acquisition form."

Dawn shook her head. "No, you were proofreading something." She called up footage to show her.

"Okay, so I have short term memory issues." She rubbed her forehead. "We need it in an hour. It's the parts contract."

"I might have that done." She got into her desk computer, staring at it. "Okay, or maybe someone wiped it on me." She got into her data backup. "I've been doing one."

Pepper looked and moaned. It was empty. "JARVIS?"

"Someone last night somehow let loose an EMP. I sent an email."

"Which I never got," Dawn said. "Not that there was much I could do about it." She looked in her laptop and tablet. "Okay, is this it?" Pepper shook her head. "Is it like that?" Pepper nodded. "Let me do that. Clint, can you go get me a coffee please?"

"Sure, Dawn." He went across the street to get her a good one and came back to find Pepper and Linda talking in the office. He handed Dawn her coffee. Linda was sniffling. "JARVIS, who did the EMP?"

"One of the cleaners." He put up that picture. "I do not know who he is."

"That's my ex-husband," Linda said quietly. Pepper moaned and thumped her head on the desk. "I'm sorry, Pepper. I had no idea! He's got a restraining order...."

Dawn held up a hand. "Linda, we all have ex's like that. I ran into an almost ex because he was trying to kill Steve while we were on vacation," she said as she typed. "Pepper, I need particulars." She handed over the file. Dawn warped an older document to reflect those changes. She let Pepper and Linda proofread it and sipped her coffee. She looked at Clint. "Can you please find my USB?" Linda handed it over. "The other one. That's my diss."

She found it and Dawn ran it, finding the things they'd need later this week. "Thankfully I work ahead. Linda, take this and proof it. We need it tomorrow at 9am." She printed it and handed it over. She handed Pepper three more things she printed and Clint one. "For Tony please?" She smiled. "You make a great assistant." He smiled but went to do that for her. Dawn reloaded everyone's calendar and looked over what they still needed. Only one was critical for that day. That got done first. Pepper hugged her then Linda before going to work on some things of her own that needed to be recreated.

"When problems hit Stark, they do it all at once," Linda said quietly.

Dawn nodded. "Definitely and usually at obscene levels of stupid to quote Rodney." She got back to work after draining her coffee. She answered the phone one-handed. "Thank you for calling Stark International, how may I direct your call?" She smiled. "Yes, headmistress, this is her. No, I'm in the middle of recreating something that the computer ate. I can take two though." She saved and leaned back to listen to her. "That was my ideal solution but then that headmistress decided I was being uppity.

"His learning is why I did not consider you originally," she agreed. "Because I want my son to move forward without having to be skipped. He's too young for that. No, I think by next fall he's going to be even further ahead. The schools I wanted him in were either closed or were snotty to me because I choose to work." She listened, pointing at the phone when Pepper looked at her, getting a nod. She listened. "That's where I really wanted him. Clint said he didn't care as long as it was good and not full of snobs. Natasha was all for him going to East Lake."

She heard the delicate shudder. "He liked the building. Clint wouldn't have minded and we would've enhanced what they were teaching him at home." She listened to her suggestion. "I'd love to but she was snotty to me at a business tea. She had people come harass me. Yeah, that was her thing. I had to ask her husband to remove himself from my dissertation board. It did not please anyone. I had to make sure I got a fair hearing though." She crossed her legs.

"Dawn, work," Tony complained.

"It's the headmistress of the school, Tony. I've only got one thing to do today and I'm half done. Count it as my lunch?" He grimaced but nodded, going into the office. "Yes, I am. We had a huge computer issue last night. Ate weeks of work. No, I've got some of it backed up in places where it shouldn't have been found." She frowned at her desk safe then in there. She pointed. Tony shrugged, coming out to see why the EMP had worked there. "That's what we wanted but if it's going to cause that much stress on my son I'm about to hire a private tutor. I won't have my son upset by people like that. That's why I let my tax return slip so well. So they'd quit trying to be so snotty. It didn't work."

She smiled. "I had not looked at them. Clint didn't like them to be honest. He thought the main building looked like it was going to fall in." She heard they were building a few new buildings. "I know it's a parent's job to help fundraise," she said. "I had to tell him about that actually." She smiled at Tony. "If he'd interview us, I'd adore that. When is a good time for him?" She pulled up her calendar while the headmistress talked to him. "I have a meeting during that time but I can send the spouses and listen in. Well, yes, but it's proprietary to the Avengers. It would be a huge misuse but I'm pretty sure my boss wouldn't mind."

"Nope," Tony agreed. "You could call off the meeting."

"That's with the FBI. Us making peace with the local office that we had to find out the hard way was full of idiots who didn't want to do their job."

"That one," he snorted. "Great." He looked at Pepper.

"They called it," she said.

"Pity. I'd reschedule."

Dawn hugged him. "Thanks, boss." She sat up again. "That's fine. I can definitely do that. No, this has to do with them ignoring things like biological weapons being sent to us and them not doing anything. They were ordered to make peace and we were all but ordered to play nicely." The headmistress laughed. "I can make that if he'd prefer it. Sure, that's a great time. I can make him put on clothes and all that. Last time I heard, he was wandering around in big boy undies and his father's t-shirt because he had an ear ache." She smiled. "Even better. Thank you, Headmistress. That is very kind of you. It's a great weight off us and a huge favor I owe you."

She smiled. "I can talk to Mr. Stark but the kids are probably going to the one in Long Island where Callia's going. They're doing the same sort of work Callia was. Including Liz. Yes, all that. I can mention it though. Thank you." She put the phone against her shoulder. "They need a roof on the science building." She mouthed, "I can do it" and he nodded. She put it back against her shoulder. "I think I can talk him into contributing at least fifteen thousand for that new roof. All students should have a safe place to experiment and learn to love science."

She smiled. "That's a great thing. Of course. We can send over a cashier's check today. Give me a few hours to go to the bank for him." She grinned at Clint when he came back. "Sure, thank you and him for me please. Have a great day." She hung up. She wrote out the check for Natasha since she came off the elevator. "It's to be in cashier's check form for the school we are not going to. She got us an interview with a good one later tonight."

"Philip feels miserable," Clint said.

"It's then or while we're meeting with the FBI. This was a huge favor she did us."

Natasha nodded. "I will do that. The one with the willows?" Dawn nodded, grinning at her. "The new one?"

"The one Clint thought looked like it was falling down. They're building a few new buildings."

He nodded. "Which they'd like us to contribute to?" he guessed. She nodded. "Are we buying his place, Dawn?"

"No. They have half the city's academic olympic kids in their system." Clint looked impressed at that. "I would've liked him to go there but you hated it."

"That school. Okay. If that works out."

"If not, I'll hire a tutor." He grinned. "And design our own home school curriculum." He walked off laughing. Natasha went to the bank for her. She hugged Tony. "Thank you. My son would be in public school if you didn't pay me outrageously. Now, how did my shielded safe have an EMP?"

"It didn't." He held up a device. "It had a problem."

"It was locked when I left. Or I thought I locked it."

"I can find out." He went to look at the security footage. The guy had picked the locks. That was sweet of him. Stark got Steve to have him scared to death for tampering with them. Plus enforce the restraining order. Steve was more than happy to help. Things were very quiet today.

***

Bruce looked at the judge. "I wanted to talk to you, Your Honor."

"I know who you are, Mr. Banner."

"Then you know that what she did was very dangerous. She made it so I lost enough control that I nearly attacked my granddaughter, who I adore, and my stepdaughter, who is someone I never even thought about, even when she was in a bikini on the beach," he said quietly. "It's not only humiliating but I nearly broke free of the building." The judge shuddered. "Dawn had to put herself at risk so they could move Callia because she hadn't been able to get out of the way before then." He cleared his throat. "Tony had to send in a surrogate device with Joyce's body rhythms and perfume so I would attack it instead."

He handed over the evidence. "From our internal sensors. She had the air so poisoned it leaked out. The two young engineers in the next lab from hers were caught in it. It was male specific and she cranked it up because I was slightly protected by... by the other guy." He slumped some, putting his hands in his pockets. "I know you have to decide on those other charges. I had no control. Not conscious, not unconscious. I'm told I barely hesitated from nearly hurting my granddaughter in a horrible manner, which is when Dawn stepped in to risk her own life.

"I would have gotten free because as soon as I realized I would've fled. Still hyped or not. I can't guarantee that I wouldn't have hurt whoever I ran into. I know what sort of monster I can be. That's why I've worked so hard to control it. She took that from me. She nearly turned that monster onto the city. I can't say whoever I ran into I wouldn't have worn that out on. So no, it wasn't just the building, it was probably the whole city, Your Honor. No matter how ashamed I am of that fact."

The judge looked at him. "Do you feel like you were raped by her serum?"

"I do. My control was taken from me. It made me attack others in a sexual manner. If she had given a college guy that same serum at a human level, he would've been as much of a victim. I was just a more dangerous one because she decided I was an experiment and a failed one. That I wasn't human any longer."

He nodded. "That was put out by the prosecutor." He stared at him. "Are you getting counseling?"

"I'm working with someone on my control and my wife has been helping me. Joyce is really better than any therapist and I can tell her things I couldn't them."

"Good. You're right. You could have hurt a great many people, Doctor Banner, and I'm glad you didn't."

"Me too. I ...I'm not sure I could stand that. Especially not Callia. I can't even stand to look at her because I get flashes of myself staring at her."

"I'm going to leave those charges in." Bruce nodded, swallowing. "I hope you can find the help you need to see it wasn't your fault."

"Even though I know it, does it really matter?"

"It does. That child would tell you the same thing." Bruce nodded and left. He summoned both sides. He looked at the prosecutor. "I just got handed information from Stark's internal systems." He let him see it. "Did you have that?"

"No, Your Honor. We weren't going to ask Mr. Stark, to keep down the problems."

"Well, you have it now." He let the other one see it. "I just talked to her primary victim. He explained how bad it could have been if he had gotten out of confinement. Including that he nearly raped his grandchild and stepdaughter." The lawyers both shuddered. "That he could have gotten out of that building and the rest of the city would've been screwed too until it was out of his system. The charges are standing. I find a great bit of merit in the jury hearing that it may be relevant."

"Yes, Your Honor," the defense attorney said. He looked at the prosecutor. "Deal?"

"We'll talk about it tomorrow. Let me have this explained to me." He took the papers to have the judge's assistant copy them for them. He went to his favorite ME. "Explain this to me please. This is what the Stark internal sensors found in the air in Dr. Banner's lab."

"Is this about the twit that drugged him?" He nodded. She looked it over. "In a normal human he would've been dead at half this level."

"That's what I thought you'd say. How bad would it have been if the Hulk had gotten out."

"Only he'd know."

"What sort of damage would he do to a human body?"

"Depends on the size of them. A tinier human or a child? They'd be in pieces. An adult too probably because he'd get upset and rip them up in other ways." She handed it back. "Is he okay?"

"No. He's not."

"That makes him a decent human being." He nodded and went to think about the charges he wanted to apply the most. She said a silent prayer for the poor guy and got back to work.

***

The SHIELD infirmary nurse logged into the patient room. It was in the secure section and you had to have special clearance to visit any of these patients. This one was a quadriplegic thanks to a gunshot high up his back. He was not happy, ever, but she could understand that. She had no idea of his name, if he was a former agent or a prisoner. All he was to her was a patient and a number. "Hello, Patient Number 9." She smiled. "Let's get you through your daily exercises and then cleaned up." He grunted. He didn't have a breathing tube but he never talked to her. Just grunted in displeasure.

She moved each of his joints to make sure he didn't atrophy too much. Then she gave him a bed bath and checked his nutrient drips and bags. She did what she needed to do to take care of him then left. She nodded at the new doctor when she passed by him in the halls. Must be his day to do rounds down here. He was so adorable. Movie star handsome, dark hair, soft pale skin. Liked knives, which was a turn-on for her at least.

The doctor logged in and walked in, closing and locking the door. He stared at him. "What are we going to do about you?" he asked.

Barney Barton turned his head barely to look at him. "Give me mercy?"

"Or give you a new body."

Barney smirked. "Sure, why not try it again. This time I'll be more subtle."

"Just don't go after your family. She'll do worse next time. Look how often my original got hit by that dark angel." He put the machine on his head to read the memories. It was strangely like the SGC's version but made for a much different purpose. When it was done downloading all the memories and skills, he killed the patient and left, going to the lab. He had someone who needed a miracle and he was the guy to do it. His original was off playing with the other clone that had been made. Not like he had the skills or memories to use the swords his original did. The science information he had stolen was much cooler anyway. He'd thank the guys that had gotten him free of the tube but they had unfortunately all died. But not before he had found their nifty memory machine. The last one had been very informative.

***

Clint came in from the interview, loosening his tie, blinking at Dawn. "He didn't believe her and had Philip do the test all over again." Dawn smiled, she had heard that. "And he passed. The headmaster was amused. Especially when Philip asked him why he didn't have a beard and a funny set of clothes."

"He was watching Harry Potter yesterday." She grinned. "So I take it he got in?"

"He did get in. In first grade." She hopped up to kiss him. He cuddled her. "Thank you for turning into the uppity bitch."

She nuzzled his throat. "Anything for my boys." He smirked at her. "Anyway, meeting went poorly."

"Dawn!" Pepper complained.

"It did."

"Well, yeah." She came to the doorway. "I'm sensing celebration?"

"Philip's going to first grade."

"Aww! That's great!" She hugged him too. Then Dawn. "Now if only Dawn had all the stuff that got eaten done." Dawn pointed at her printer tray. "Oh, please no."

"Only way it can't be erased." She grinned. "Because you called me chunky, Pep." She beamed.

"Bitch," she muttered, taking it to look through. "That's still four short, Dawn."

Linda came in with hers. "I have three of them."

"And I'm proofreading the last one, Pepper."

Linda looked. "Wasn't I supposed to do that one?"

"I don't remember," Dawn said, flipping to the other one. "But sure, I nearly have this one done." She looked at Clint.

"Daycare with Chris, bragging."

"Oh." She finished up and did a spell check, printing it for Pepper with a grin. Pepper looked and held up the duplicates. "Okay, I do have short term memory problems." She frowned. "I printed it while it was incomplete?"

"I believe I found the originals," JARVIS said. "Which means that I'm now printing the one that is missing, Dawn."

Dawn smiled at the ceiling. "I love you, JARVIS. You're a great fussy uncle."

"I do adore looking after you, Dawn, and you do look like you cuddle nicely."

Pepper looked. "Have that one, JARVIS." They went over all them and Dawn found the last one, which was in outline format. She sighed and settled in to do it while Clint lounged by her and watched her type. Pepper went to her office with a sigh. Clint and Dawn were flirting again. It was pitiful but cutesy. Especially with Clint in that suit. Tony didn't look like that in suits. She really had to have Dawn go with him to gay him up again as Dawn called it. Though... Tony came off the elevator taking off his tie. That had to be a suit Liz had picked. That looked good on him. She shut the office door. "I'm busy, Dawn."

"Sure, Pepper."

Tony smiled. "Busy are we?"

"Yes, she had to print." She took a kiss. "I'll be proofreading all night."

"Then it's a great thing I intend to make you dinner." He pushed her onto the couch and followed to tease his Pepper. His levels of her were low, sucked out by politicians who had not a single idea who they were screwing with. He looked over when something was slid under the door and they heard Dawn and Clint leave. Well, hopefully it'd be good for them too. It certainly was for Tony.

***

Liz found her grandfather in his lab and sighed, walking in there. He flinched when she climbed up him but she was just as stubborn as her sister so she made it into his lap, standing up to stare at his eyes. "You did not hurt us. Callia got *really* upset because the science bimbo hurt you but she wasn't scared of you. She knew you wouldn't hurt her."

"I'm not so sure I wouldn't."

"We. Are." She smiled. "And since we're girls, we're always right. That's why Chris wants to be one of us."

He hugged her. "Not always, Liz, but close enough." She cuddled him. She wasn't scared of him. Joyce wasn't scared of him. He was scared of him though. "You still shouldn't interrupt me in the lab."

She snorted. "If you were doing work it'd be different. You're not. You're pouty like I am when I run out of gummy bears." She looked at him. "I can get you some so you can share with Grandma."

"I'll pick her up some candy when I go home." He smiled slightly.

She stared at him. "That's tonight, right? Since it's your anniversary?" He winced. "And Grandma's birthday is in *two* days? I can help you shop."

"I'm sure you can. You do a very nice job."

Joyce smiled from the doorway. "He's already got my present, Liz, but thank you. You helped a lot."

"It's not fair he's hiding from me, Grandma. I might have to turn mean and dye his hair or something." She stared at her grandfather. "Really, I might. I might dye it green and purple. Make Uncle Clint wonder if you're flirting with him by wearing both your colors." He gave her a cuddle until she wiggled down. "I'll let Grandma have you so I don't have to be mean. Remember, I learned from Callia and Mommy Pepper."

"You learned a lot from them, sweetheart. Thank you." She grinned and ran off to get a treat for being so good. Even if the security guys did escort her to the pastry shop. He looked at Joyce. "I...."

She kissed him. "You had to figure out that you still had control, Bruce. I understood. I know the hating yourself for being weak, all that. Really, I do understand." He pulled her into his arms and cuddled her. She cuddled back, nibbling on his ear. He pulled back to give her a look. She smiled. "I need dinner."

"Are you turning cannibal?"

She smirked. "I don't know. I've been known to make a nice lunch out of you."

He blushed. "Joyce!" She pounced in a way that would do her daughter proud. They ended up on the floor but the slight banging only made Bruce more tender to the touches she gave him. When he finally came apart in her hands, he cuddled her as hard as he could. She had made him see he wasn't a monster. It had sank in and it was good. He kissed her hair and they laid there, just out of sight of the doorway. Which is why Chris started to walk in then paused and grinned at them before running off.

Joyce looked over then at him. "Chris?" He nodded. "I'm sure by now he's seen his father naked at least once." She kissed him again.

"We have two bedrooms," he reminded her.

"Yes but they're at least thirty minutes away with the way traffic is and I'd hate to traumatize my driver, dear."

"We have guest suites not two floors down." She kitty smirked and hauled him up so he could lead her to one. That was an idea she could get behind. It proved why he was the family genius.

Upstairs, Callia sighed because she was bored. Some day she'd figure out why the silly adults kept hiding and giggling to have sex. Just not this year. Or anytime soon.

***

Dawn stepped out of the limo, smiling at the driver holding the door for her. "Thank you." She walked forward. They were meeting at the event since everyone was scattered today. It was a charity event in LA for a children's hospital. She smiled at the first reporter, who wasn't a fashion one. "Morning."

"Dawn." He stared. Her dress looked like water was flowing over her skin from the side. It covered one arm, went around her throat, 'drizzling' down her back in a beaded set of lines to the very low, asymmetrical waistline that slightly uncovered one hip. In the front, you could almost see some sideboob and it clung in waves down her side to be joined with the back by a large aquamarine broach at the lower hip. It bared that side's leg up to her thigh and the other side was fully covered but there were little wave-looking things around it. "Is that fitted right?"

She looked. "Nope. Hold on." She attached a few of the waves to their intended spots. "Short or long?"

"Long," he said, staring in awe. "Not that one. Or the one that pulled the waist." She undid those and he stared. That had made it fit so her chest was highlighted now and it had taken up the slack around her waist on the fully covered side. The waves highlighted the patterns woven into the blue fabric, which was probably a very delicate silk. She smiled at him. "Um.... Sorry if I drool."

She laughed. "It's all right. I'm sure others will. This is Mom's first charity event."

"Ah. So you're taking the pressure off your mother."

"I am." She winked at someone that walked behind her. Then got frozen by staring over his shoulder.

"Huge problems?" he asked, looking around.

"Clint's right there," she said with a point. She smiled at him. "He's staring and trapped me."

He looked then at her. "If you were my wife I'd stare too. And then pounce a whole lot."

"That is a great thing about Clint." She winked and checked her hair in the 'wardrobe mistake' tent that they had off to the side. It was pushed off one side and held back by a coral and pearl comb, with the rest in curls. She came out to find her mother coming up. "Mom." She looked good. It was one of Dawn's dresses she hadn't gotten to wear. It was a bit cleavage baring but not too immodest. Her hair, though, had a feathered....hair appliance in it. She looked up.

"My assistant thought it'd go nicely," she said.

"I think it does," she agreed. "It does highlight your hair's color." She smiled and took her arm, blowing a kiss back at Bruce, who was blushing but rubbing the back of his neck while staring at his wife's backside. Joyce was blushing about it. "That dress does do wonders for you, Mom." She smiled as they ran into Clint and Natasha, who had to come from the local SHIELD office. Clint looked nice in his tux. Natasha looked very nice in her subtly sexy formal gown.

Clint looked at his naughty wife then at Natasha. Then back at Dawn. "You're getting it later."

She smirked a tiny bit. "Then it's a good thing we have sitters so I can get loud, huh?" She kissed him, earning a smirk. "C'mon, Mom."

"Sure, dear." She patted Clint on the arm. "You know she does it for that reaction."

"Yes, she does," he agreed. He watched them walk and moaned. "Damn I'm a lucky bastard."

"Yes, we are," Natasha agreed. "I think that would make charming strips of fabric to tie her down with." One of the other people attending choked. She looked at him. "Dawn does deserve such attention at times." They walked on with Bruce. Steve, Pepper, and Tony were in their own group.

One of the fashion reporters stopped them. "Dawn, wow." She smiled a tiny kitty smirk. "Um.... same guy that did the sheet dress?"

"Yes. You should see the fire one he made for me." That got a moan from Natasha and a head shake from Clint. "I'm sure you've seen my mom before."

"I have. Mrs. Banner." She shook her hand. "That's a great dress."

"Dawn leant it to me. I don't usually have anything this fanciful in my closet." She touched her hairpiece. "My assistant said that fascinators were in."

"They are." She looked and nodded. "That's a pretty one and it does highlight your hair very well." Joyce smiled. "You guys have fun inside."

"This is a charity the whole family supports thanks to what Mom had to go through," Dawn said more quietly. "We do a lot for the cancer charities."

"That's sweet, Dawn, and we know you've helped and mentored at a few cancer centers in both cities." She squeezed her hand. "Go make Clint drool some more."

He wiped his mouth with a grin. "Trapped between these two? Yeah, I drool a lot." She laughed and they walked on.

"Should we switch sides of the carpet?" Joyce asked quietly.

"If they want us, they'll yell for us," Dawn assured her with a grin. "We are not desperate for attention." Her mother smiled and patted her arm that was joined with her own. They got stopped by a few others. Dawn smiled at one, letting her mother have the spotlight.

"Oh, my god, Dawn," Pepper said, staring at her. "You have a picture of you looking like that."

Dawn smirked at her. "That was the dress's inspiration. You should see the fire one."

Pepper moaned, shaking her head. "I'm so glad I'm secure that I can't be twenty-four again." Dawn giggled and hugged her. Tony and Steve were both staring at her. "What?"

"One of the little waves came undone," Bruce said with a point. She looked and hitched it back into place. Tony sighed, looking at Pepper.

"I know she's like our eldest kid at times," Pepper assured him with a grin. "You did teach her how to be flirty, Tony."

"Yes, I did." He looked at Dawn. "Way too damn well." Joyce laughed, swatting him on the arm. "Save me a dance, Joyce. You're hot but Pepper doesn't get jealous of you."

"She has no reason to get jealous of anyone, Tony. Pepper's a stunning woman in looks, skills, and her mind," Joyce told him. Pepper smiled and hugged her. They went inside and it was a lot easier in there. Joyce had gone to a few events in the past. This part was a bit more normal to her. She could almost relax in here and Bruce was a very nice dancer. And if more people watched Dawn dance with Clint and Natasha, that was fine with her too.

***

Pepper was watching the fashion review show the next day with Liz. "I don't know why they let her do that to others," she said dryly at one scathing comment.

"Okay, it's time for a section of 'what the hell'?" the older woman said. "Because, literally, what the hell were they thinking!" Pictures were flashed of Dawn and Joyce.

"Well," one of them said. "Dawn said a few things that got noticed out front. This was her mother's first event. So she was drawing attention from Joyce."

"That's nearly as bad as that sexy sheet she wore that time," the older woman said.

"But she looks good, even if it's unorthodox," the younger woman complained. "She looked hot. She even froze when her husband caught sight of her and stared." They put her up on the 3-D rotating view. "It fits her well. All those little waves let her adjust her fit as needed or wanted. Even if it does look like she got painted by laying on her side in the tub, it's a great dress."

"It's still.... .that," the older woman said.

"If I had a body like that, I'd have worn it to something bigger," the one said. "And she did draw attention away from her mother all night with it. That let Joyce stay calm and react like a normal person who hadn't done any events in nearly ten years."

"Ten years?" the lone male on the panel asked.

"Her first husband had a bit of status due to his job so they went to minor charity events and the like," the younger one told him. "I looked that up when she was made co-Director of SHIELD with Captain Rogers. Who still hides behind his boyfriend most of the time."

"Some people aren't really comfortable with that sort of attention," she agreed.

"Okay, I can see her doing it for that reason. She's gotten some outrageous dresses in the past to try to draw attention from the others in the group."

"Which is one reason why Stark hired her," the other woman said with a smile. "He's said so a few times. Dawn's part diversion for them."

"Huh. I guess I can accept that, even if it is sexy water. I'm sure her husband had a lot of fun undoing her."

"He was talking to his other wife on the carpet and mentioned cutting it off her to use it to tie her down," the young one said with a smile. "Dawn just shot him a look and blushed."

"She didn't hit many reporters," the male said.

"When they walked off from talking to me, Joyce asked if they should talk to anyone. Dawn said if they wanted to talk to them they'd call out their names. Not that many did." She smiled. "Dawn's pretty savvy. Stark and Potts taught her well how to manage those things for them. I know Joyce said she was borrowing a dress Dawn hadn't gotten to wear." They switched to Joyce's outfit. "It fits her well. It doesn't show that she's still a bit on the thin side and having problems keeping weight on." The others stared at her. "It's been five years I think since she got out of cancer treatment and she's still having some problems keeping weight on. We've noted in the past she's looked a bit thin and tired." They all nodded.

"Okay, what's with the hair?" the older one demanded.

"She said her assistant talked her into it. It's also brilliant that it's covering where her hair's still a bit fragile," the other woman said.

"Hmm. Mum's hair after her breast cancer treatments got a bit more curly when it grew back but it breaks horribly and she had a terrible time getting any length back," the young one agreed.

"Me too. Thankfully I didn't lose that much but Joyce lost most of her hair over the years. She didn't shave it, like a lot do but she was always hiding it with pretty scarves. I think it does well holding her hair into a gentle style that won't break it and it doesn't let you see all the little flyaways where she's probably got breakage and where she's been going gray a lot more since then."

"She could color it."

"No," the other woman said with a head shake. "That'd destroy her hair. Chemotherapy does a lot of bad things to your hair and skin. It did mine."

"It did my mother's," the young one said. "Mum had weeks at the spa trying to undo some of the heavy chemical damage from it."

The other one nodded. "I did too. Joyce got her skin back but her hair is still rebounding. I've seen some that never get back to the point of having thicker hair. You lose a lot of hair and what you have left changes, breaks if you run your fingers through it, or it goes prematurely gray." She looked at the headpiece. "I think it was a bit high. If it had been maybe an inch shorter I would've liked it more. Though it goes well with the outfit."

"It does," the guy agreed. "Her husband clearly likes it with the way he was caught watching her walk more than once that night." He smiled. "Dawn got her booty from her mother."

The young one nodded. "Joyce was seriously hotter in her youth. Before the bad marriage and all that." She put up a picture she had uploaded. "That's her before her wedding." They all smiled at the fashionable, perky young woman. "I can see her wearing some of Dawn's less outrageous outfits."

"Me too," the old woman agreed. "Women had class back then."

"Dawn wasn't uncovered, wasn't showing cleavage. It was tasteful even if it was back bearing and showed the swell of one hip."

"Dawn has the body to pull that off. Pepper would be too skinny," the guy said. "Joyce too." They all nodded they agreed with that. "But Dawn has that body from the kids."

"Clint said he appreciates it almost every single day," the young one said smugly. "I asked during the event. He said that's the greatest gift he's gotten outside the kids. Natasha nicely blushed at that when he praised how great pregnancy had changed their bodies."

"Natasha does look hotter in her battle uniform. She had curves before but the new depth of the curves from the maternity do make her look hotter," the older woman agreed. "I don't like lesbians but I'd tap that." They all smiled. "Okay, onto fashion disasters not named Summers. Or whatever Dawn goes by this week."

"She goes by Summers for business things or Romanoff-Barton in private," the young one said. "I asked."

The old woman shook her head. "Can't she pick?"

"Everyone knows her maiden name from the business stuff. Plenty of women keep their name except for formal naming conventions," the guy said. "She did the same thing but in private and non-business things she's a wife." He shrugged. "But I think it's cute."

"It is," the young one agreed with a grin.

"Dawn's in mushy, gooey love and it's adorable on her," the other woman agreed with a smile. "Though, have you seen that someone was making...toys from the team? I asked Dawn for a comment and she said they got Clint's four inches too short and an inch too narrow." They all gaped. She pulled it up to show them. "I'm not sure what they're basing it on."

"Let's look at Clint's outfit," the guy said, putting him up on the 3-D view. "No, they underestimated."

The older woman stared and nodded she agreed. "Definitely. We've heard Dawn had a few days where she couldn't sit. Now we know why."

"Eww, someone made a Hulk penis?" the young one asked. "It's even green."

The guy looked then shook his head. "Probably *very* underestimated. Though I doubt he's ever let anyone see it." The woman all smirked at him for that. "Some people are size queens," he quipped. They went to commercial on that cheerful note.

Pepper looked at her daughter, shaking her head. "I'm not telling Bruce about that."

"Grandpa already has an action figure," Liz said dryly. "He doesn't need more toys made of him. It makes him all blushy and then he tries to hide from us." She slid off the couch. "I'll go tell him."

"No, don't do that," Pepper said, but it was too late. She groaned and sent a text to Tony's phone to warn him. And one to Clint to warn him too. Clint would not be amused, well maybe at the remarks from Dawn that whoever couldn't visually measure properly but most likely not amused.

A few minutes later, Bruce carried Liz back in, shaking his head with a blush as he walked off. He was going to hide in his closet at home with Joyce for a bit.

***

It was the second round of interviews SHIELD was making them do. Dawn was up first because they wanted to talk to her more than nearly anyone. Her mother's was after Dawn's so they could go shopping for the kids. Philip needed things for his birthday. Dawn smiled at the reporter. Not a *real* reporter but more of an entertainment reporter. SHIELD hadn't cared as long as they did something for positive publicity. So Dawn had given in to some begging. "So, what did you want to talk about?"

"A few things. First, some people said you were getting snotty with the local society folks?"

Dawn laughed, shaking her head. "Not hardly. I could care less what they think about me but I would not let the lying and the false assumptions stand. I kept hearing 'you're *just* an assistant' when we were looking at good schools for Philip. I couldn't let that stand. I'm more than an assistant."

"It's said that you run a few farms under another identity?"

"It's my emergency escape one but I'll have to redo it since you guys found it." She smiled. "In case things like what happened after Romania happen again."

"I guess I can understand that. Is that legal?"

"Within some loopholes but gray. Most of the time other countries understand when you're not doing it because you're a criminal."

"Huh. I did not know that, but you do have some contacts with other agents."

"I do, yes."

"Through your spouses?"

"Not all of them." She smiled. "There's one in England that tried to capture me so they could get me to give them the Iron Man plans. We fought and he kinda respects me. Anytime I find out about bad things that he should hear about and handle for the UK, I send them to him. I've met a few over things like that." The reporter gave her a funny look. Dawn grinned. "Sometimes those things happen."

"I guess." She looked at her. "A starlette said you insulted her because you thought women looked strange with a six pack."

Dawn giggled, grinning at her. "Some women can rock it, some women can't. I'm one who cannot. I look very strange. If she's one of the few that look good that way, then go for it. Personally I think women look a bit unnatural when they're that muscled. I can't imagine someone like Marilyn Monroe or Jane Mansfield with a six-pack of abs. Can you?"

She paused then shook her head quickly. "No, I can't. But today's Hollywood...."

"Is so full of shit," Dawn said bluntly. "No real woman is that tall and skinny. Biologically, women should have some curves. Some softness. Granted that was for childbirth to go easier on them and to nurture the child later, but I've seen a good few of them that looked like well clothed skeletons. Way too skinny and I want to make sure my nieces and daughters didn't turn out that way. Half the time I want to look at them and ask if I can make them a good dinner. Most of them look like they could use a few good meals. Even if I was in Hollywood, I'd be like the older screen goddesses. I don't need implants to keep my breasts and I'm about five pounds under my correct weight because this is where I look good."

"I can see that point. She said she could run a marathon and you probably couldn't."

"I only do 10K twice a week," Dawn said. "But I've run farther in the past." The reporter blinked at her. Dawn grinned. "I'm in Avengers shape, not muscle mass shape. If something happens I need to be able to handle it. Even if it means chasing a bad guy halfway across Manhattan."

"I guess I can see that." She stared at her. "She wanted to challenge you to run a marathon."

"Sure. Best time wins?" She smiled. "How much did she want to wager and would she agree that the winner pays the other's charity?"

"Charity?"

Dawn gave her a look. "Not like either of us would need more money. I've always donated to a number of charities."

"Oh. I'll ask her." She texted her. She got one back. "She said that's fine."

"Tell her to let me know which charity she's using. That way I can look into it." The reporter stared at her. "For future use. If they're good and need funds badly I might put them onto my donation list next year. I have four standard ones I do every year and then I've added in some here and there who needed it."

"You do?"

"I've put out donations since I was seventeen. I've always felt since I've earned more than enough to save for a comfortable life that I should donate to those who haven't had a chance to do the same thing yet. Or those who need help with bad things going on in their lives. One of the four constant ones I donate to is an abuse shelter for men."

"Men?" she demanded.

"It's not just a joke that women beat on their men, dear. Plenty of men have to fight the stereotype that they're men, they should be stronger, while women joke about clocking them with a frying pan upside the head. Men can and are abused daily and not a lot of attention is paid to it. Like male rape victims, there's a huge stigma there that they have to get past. I've always donated to a male abuse shelter. I have an acquaintance that needed their services one year and gladly gave him their name and number. Actually I keep a list of helpful organizations in my desk for anyone at Stark that needs them. I've donated to them for years and used my matching funds from Stark to add to it. I also donate to a few women's abuse charities as well."

"Huh. I never gave it any thought." She paused. "I've seen some butch women who could beat up their husbands."

"It doesn't take a butch woman. It just takes a companion that's snapped to the point of hitting them. Chronically or the first time doesn't matter. It happens to both hetero and homosexual male relationships. It's not covered, which it should be. The stereotype is really a bad thing and it keeps a lot of men from getting the help they need to stop it before their partner kills them. They run higher risks of that outcome or suicide to get it to stop than women do because women know there's help and people prompt them to get help. Men don't get that prompting or told that there is help. Some whole states don't have abuse shelters that can help men, especially with their kids. For this being one of the most modern cities in the world, we only have one and nineteen female abuse shelters, all of which turn men aside. Which I can understand but it's a problem that's not noted. Both sexes should be safe and happy in their chosen relationships."

"I hadn't given it much thought but you see anti-violence campaigns aimed at wife beaters."

Dawn nodded. "You do."

"Huh." She made a note of that. "Do you have their name right off so I can look them up?" Dawn wrote down a single contact name and number. "Thank you."

"They do good work and there's a growing need on both sides. I'd probably have the wager donation go to them."

"I'll keep that in mind." She looked at her. "Lighter questions." Dawn grinned. "How are the girls?"

"They're great."

"Are they multilingual? I heard rumors about you and a dissertation?"

"Yes, I did defend my dissertation and I'm walking in a few weeks." The reporter blinked. Dawn grinned. "I did it on teaching children to be multilingual naturally the way the kids in Europe get it using a more Americanized system of teaching. We teach our kids differently but if kids in some countries over there natively speak three and four languages, why do ours get pushed to only speak one?"

"I don't know," she admitted.

"Even if you're working as a guy who sells newspapers, the other languages can come in handy."

"It can." She smirked. "Is Philip?"

"Yes. Philip this morning looked at Mommy Natasha with his most grumpy face and told her she was an evil queen for waking him up too early in Russian. She praised him for using Russian and told him if she was an evil queen he'd be eating oatmeal without any flavoring. Instead she was making him one of her protein shakes because he loves that Mommy Natasha eats weird food."

"Awww. Did he learn it from her?"

"Some. Some from me. Some from a show."

"You let your kids watch tv? I took you as the 'you don't need that garbage' sort of parent."

"They're allowed to watch educational shows right now and some movies. All age appropriate. Though I am not showing my kids Bambi. I don't want them that upset. They aren't allowed to watch Nickelodeon most of the time. Natasha had a really bad reaction to Sponge Bob that meant we needed a new tv. Twice. She gets this cute eye twitch about Sponge Bob."

"I can see that point and I think most parents get that same eye twitch over Sponge Bob. So no watching Old Yeller?"

"Nope. Actually, Philip loves animals but hates animal movies. Even animated ones. Which is kinda nice since so many of them are depressing."

"They can be. There's educational shows like Dora in other languages?"

"Yeah." She smiled. "He likes the Russian one. It comes on when it's bath time so he sits in there and watches it during his bath. Then he goes to babble about it at the girls. Which is nice. Lexi was calling Mommy Natasha Babushka the other day."

The reporter laughed. "That's adorable."

"It is. Mira tends to scowl at us for not talking at her no matter which language we're using. She's a tiny bit grumpy when she's not being paid attention to. Some day soon she's going to be the diva that Philip turns into when you get him up too early."

"Does Clint mind him and his clothes obsession?"

"He's not *obsessed* at the moment. He has things he favors, he thinks are neat. Liz Stark showed him how pretty some things made him, which freaked out Clint a tiny bit since she also did a stunning lipstick job on him with Mommy Pepper's lipsticks, including on his eyelids. Really a lot harder to get off than eyeshadow. We had to talk about how eyeshadow went on the eyes and lipstick was only for lips. She's convinced both boys that they have to be pretty."

The reporter tried not to laugh. "How does Mr. Stark take that?"

"He goes along. He knows the boys will grow out of it for the most part. Liz almost had Chris convinced that he could become a girl, so therefore always be right like his big sister and her, by putting on the pretty dresses." She pulled out her phone to look up the picture. "This was Chris's idea while we were sorting out my closets again. He did a really great job of tucking it so it looked right on him. I came back from a trip to get a drink and found him doing it." The reporter did burst out laughing. "Tony explained that pretty dresses didn't make you a girl, it made you a transvestite and they were pretty but still not girls. So he liked that answer and picked on Liz some more."

"He doesn't pick on Maeve?"

"She's too young and he knows Callia will swat him good if he picks on the baby. At least until she's old enough to defend herself slightly."

"So I hear you have an assistant?"

"No, I have an under-secretary that works with me. We have a lot of things that have to get done weekly and I've heard a few jokes about time turners in the past." She smiled. "We used to have two but they were found to be the major leaks back to the press." Clint popped in with a thought about that being part of that concussion dream but she said Tony had joked a few times too when he had caught her reading Harry Potter.

"So you're not training your replacement?"

"No. I'm in no way ready to leave Stark and I'm pretty sure I'd never quit so they'll have to fire me. Have you heard I'm being fired? I haven't but you never know with the way wild rumors abound right now."

"No, I haven't. I've heard Pepper joked a few times about you making out with a spouse during your lunch break."

"We don't usually make out but if Clint's coming to pick me up for lunch or the end of my day, he'll sit and watch me work for a few minutes." She grinned. "Pepper teased him about that a few times."

"How are things personally between you three?"

"They're great."

"Do you three fight a lot?"

"Not really. If it's more than a tiny thing the kids all get to go visit Grandma for a few hours while we have a fight. I don't think the kids need to see that. They know we don't always get along and have some disagreements but I don't want them to see us fight."

"You think it'll upset them?"

"I do and I also think it sets a bad example. The tiny things that we glare at each other across the kitchen about. Natasha complaining about I put the dishes up funny or did the dishes funny. They see those. Big things, no. They don't need to see that. There's been a few fights we've tabled until they could go visit Grandma or Uncle Tony or someone else."

"Do you three tend to shout?"

"Not often. Now and then one of us will vent on the roof. We don't tend to shout while fighting. We tend to have those awful, painful silences more than not. Our last one it was so quiet the kids got worried because they were across the room. Clint and I fought while Natasha distracted them. No hope of a sitter there at that time."

"Huh. So it's like a normal marriage? You fight over the toilet seat and the toothpaste?"

"We have three sinks and two toilets in the bathroom," Dawn quipped. "It stopped most of those." The reporter laughed, shaking her head. "I have my vanity for morning makeup things so Natasha can have the bathroom all to herself since she's got lotions and concealers and I barely wear anything behind a bit of lipstick and some mascara most mornings. It lets Clint shave in peace once she's done since they leave first most mornings."

"I remember you had welts from her lotion."

"I did. She has this heavy duty lotion for when she's getting dry skin due to the heat and I'm allergic to that. I got it once when she came to bed right after putting it on and then some the next day off a couch pillow transfer." She grinned. "I bought her better stuff."

"Did it help with stretch marks?"

"We got a special aloe based lotion for those. I got one more on my side and it's already been bleached down to almost nothing like the one on my back. Natasha got one on her leg but it's also been bleached. She got the kit and used it on both of us."

"Huh. I need that one for my friend." Dawn wrote down the name, getting a grin. "I've seen that."

"We used it right out of the nightly showers."

"I'll tell her that." She tucked that into her notepad. "Do you think you'll want more some day?"

Dawn shrugged. "Not sure. Maybe an empty nest baby."

"Have you thought about adopting?"

"I have. If we hadn't been able to have kids, I would've adopted some out of the foster care system. Those kids need a lot of love and we certainly had it to give."

"Clint was a foster child, right?"

"His parents died in a car crash when he was young. He and Barney ran away from their foster home because it wasn't exactly great. Unfortunately some aren't even though there's a lot that are very good. When the system's as overcrowded as it is now, they end up taking in people who are doing it for the checks."

"I've seen stories."

"They're less than a tenth of the system but you never hear about the rest."

"Do you donate to any foster shelters?"

"I've never been asked to and the one time I asked I got laughed at and said they didn't take private donations from women who felt guilty."

"You nearly went into foster care."

"No. I was in protective custody at that point. My sister was still around and she would've taken care of me until I graduated. We talked about that option but then Agent Coulson stepped in to point out I was in protective custody and they could help me find somewhere that wasn't dangerous."

"Yet you were kidnaped a few times."

Dawn smirked. "I was in protective custody because there was a hell goddess after me. We found that out right after we found out about Mom's brain tumor."

"So it's not that uncommon?"

"It's not as common anymore. Most of the ones I see these days are more about the kids."

"Huh." She stared at her. "When did that change?"

"After the battle in Sunnydale."

"Oh." She blinked. "They didn't see you as helpless?"

"Half the ones that would've wanted me couldn't use me at that point because I wasn't a virgin after that battle. I had spilled blood and had sex so I was ineligible for most sacrificial rites or reasons. Half the ones that still wanted me had been fought off and arrested or killed by Agent Coulson and others. There's still a few who'd love to get me but they realize that I'm kinda mean about those things."

"So we've seen."

Dawn smirked. "No, I've been meaner than any you've seen." The reporter shuddered. "I figured they earned it by trying to kidnap me. Bad things happen to bad guys." She frowned for a second. "Philip cooed that at the pickpocket Natasha scared the crap out of the other day."

"Do you secretly want to be a stay-at-home mom?"

"No. The kids would drive me nuts if I didn't have a way to get away for a few hours at a time. Even if I wasn't working, they'd still have a daycare at least twice a week. I think it's good for their socialization and my sanity."

"Playgroups?"

Dawn shook her head. "No, daycare. Licensed, bonded, background checked daycare."

"So you think it'd be a safety issue?"

"Yup. I also think that Philip would be running over a lot of kids his age. He's starting first grade." The reporter cooed. Dawn grinned. "We've always read to him, taught him stuff. I think a lot of kids in his age group are coloring. Which he does a ton of. He's coloring on things like Daddy's field mission reports when they have diagrams. I'm told the agent he hands those to is not really amused by those but yay." She grinned. "Every now and then Chris will let him help him color in Dad and big sister's design drawings. He was bragging to Clint he had colored in his new bow design a pretty purple because Daddy likes that color." The reporter had to walk off she was laughing so hard. Dawn grinned and waited. She finally came back. "I think Philip might freak out the other parents a bit."

"Did your son get gun safety lessons?"

"Clint and Natasha taught him and Callia both. They're working on Liz's now. They taught Callia how to shoot in case she absolutely needs it to protect herself because the tower's been attacked again or something. Mommy Natasha and he like to sit down and read Guns and Ammo every time a new one comes in. He and Daddy read hunting magazines. He and I read hunting magazines and fashion magazines plus music ones and all sorts of things. He really like the pictures in Smithsonian's magazine."

"He likes music?"

"We all like music."

"Rock, country?"

"Depends. Clint likes older rock, seventies, early eighties, harder rock but not Kiss. He's a Led Zepplin fan and those sort of things but he'll do country sometimes. At which point in time I hand him headphones. I tend towards more modern rock with some temping in club music. Which he hands me headphones for. Natasha likes some classical, some lighter rock, some jazz. Philip gets exposed to it all. Basically, whoever gets home first gets to pick whichever Pandora station we're listening to for dinner. We each have our own and Philip's got his. He's made one for the girls that Lexi adores, she's very happy with music, and Mira tolerates it. She's not so musically inclined. She doesn't like noise."

"Sensitive hearing?"

"No, I think she just doesn't like noise. She squeals at her sister when she gets too happy and squealy. She squeals at Philip when he gets loud. She's like the librarian you see on comedies, shushing everyone. She did it to me so I turned the music up louder and made her dance with me. Which she didn't like either but her mommy saved her from the mean one making her do something besides look out the windows."

"Some kids like nature."

"She likes the reporter that likes to try to get pictures into our apartment from across the street. I think she's flirting with him. But she'll stare at the windows even when the shades are drawn. We're not sure why yet. Her pediatrician is amused by it because she'll just stare at him like 'it's your turn to impress me, now do something that doesn't require a needle'."

"She's spoiled?"

"We should've named her after Nat's cat," Dawn shared with a smile. "We really should have."

The reporter chuckled and nodded. "Sometimes girls are like that. Which one of you does the housework?"

"The housekeeper, who Natasha kindly taught how she wanted things done. Because I never did it good enough for her and she hated how I did laundry. Then she'd complain about how expensive it was when I took everything to the dry cleaner. I gave up and let her do it. She's the cleaning person, I let her do it."

"Which one of you does the most cooking?"

"We all cook. Clint's the best cook of the three of us. Sometimes he'll just decide it's his night even when it's not." She smiled. "He's really good. I learned a lot from him about how to cook. I think he used to dread that my weird food combinations when I was younger would come back and he'd end up eating stuff he didn't think went together. I liked it but he used to joke that maybe when I got pregnant my food cravings would be for normal food."

"So you're not the domestic goddess sort?"

Dawn shook her head. "I could care less if we vacuum three times a week like Natasha likes to have happen. Or if we let the dishes soak overnight, which drives her nuts."

"Is she OCD?"

"No, she's just...she grew up in a fairly strict environment so she's used to things having to be done exactly the way someone taught her to."

"Her parents?"

"Ask her."

"I can do that. What about Clint's family?"

"Ask him."

"I can do that." She smiled and Dawn smirked. "Any upcoming announcements for the Expo?"

Dawn smiled and texted someone, getting permission and a threat from Pepper for missing paperwork. "Give me two." She found it on her tablet and sent it to Pepper, texing her it was in her inbox again. Where she had sent it earlier if it had been eaten. Pepper huffed and found it. "Sorry, Pepper lost an emailed in file. Tony said, and I quote, there is a dual Stark time this time. One will be his usual flashy announcement of our greatness and the other is going to be the tinkering group he's part of and their announcement time."

"Tinkering group? He tinkers?"

"They all play around with ideas and lean on each other during it. Him, Bruce, Rodney, Andrew, Jonathan, and now Callia and sometimes Chris. With a new math person who recently got added in for some higher stuff Callia started off the tinkering group on. She's taking Calc 4 and it was above her. Really it was above everyone but Rodney but he deals in theoretical maths from other places anyway. So they pulled in a math guy Callia had talked to."

"Hmm. Sounds interesting."

Dawn grinned. "They've come up with some neat stuff. Including Chris taking one of Howard Stark's old inventions and making it work very well with a new one that was his and his dad's project."

"Very interesting tease." Dawn smiled. "Um, spinach."

"Sorry." She got it out with a fingernail then cleaned the nail off. "Thanks."

"Welcome." Dawn's phone beeped and she looked at it. "You hear about assistants that have to be on-call twenty-four/seven."

"I kinda am but I'm not really. I'm not a rock star assistant."

"You hear about some of them being forced to pick up people for their bosses for the night."

Dawn laughed. "Tony's never had a problem getting his own and Pepper has taste so they'd never ask me that. Especially if they had pissed me off that day. I might've given them someone from the Valtrex patrol." The reporter burst out laughing, shaking her head. "It never pays to piss off your assistant." She smiled sweetly. "We do control things like your dry cleaning, all your clean clothes, all that. Thankfully I'm not that sort of assistant and I have great bosses that are like stepparents most of the time."

Her phone beeped with a 'Pepper said you're grounded' from Tony. "I'm guessing Tony logged into my phone. I need to figure out why that file translated itself into Japanese. You have a great day." She shook her hand and strolled off to get back to the office. Dawn walked in and looked over Pepper's shoulder, clicking on something. Pepper sighed. Dawn tested her forehead. "You have the kid's flu. Go to bed. Before I tell Steve."

"Fine," she mumbled. "Thank you, Dawn."

"Welcome, Pepper." She smiled. "Did you find the original?"

"Yes." She looked at her. "You'd be that mean to him?"

She smiled. "Yup. If he made me pick him up bimbos I would've made sure he hit the Valtrex patrol at least once every few sluts and probably the clap at least one other time. That would've made him come running to you so you could've babied him and nagged him at the same time until he saw he was an idiot for not treating you right." She walked her up to her bed and tucked her in then went back to handle the office stuff.

Tony leaned in. "That's mean, Dawn."

"Thankfully you used to pick up your own sluts, boss."

"Yeah, thank god." He frowned. "The clap can kill your brain."

She smiled sweetly. "Only if left untreated."

He shuddered. "Barton needs to work that out of you."

"Yeah but I'm going to be filling in for Pepper since she's clearly got the flu."

"I was starting to think it was menopause."

"She's a bit too young for that, but you never know." He grimaced, going to talk to Doctor Pigalli about that stuff. Dawn got back to work. All the stuff Pepper had been complaining about was automatically sorted for her into a folder within her email. She switched where it went and that fixed most of the upcoming problems. Though she was missing a page of the newest contract. Linda had it to correct and emailed it to her. That worked and it got sent up to Pepper's tablet since she was logged on. Then Dawn sent up a note about where things had been hitting due to a filter issue and how she had fixed it.

Pepper sighed her thanks and said she was resting since everything was now done for the meeting in two days that was so important. Dawn smiled and treated Linda to a good coffee drink for getting it done early then they got back to work on the next issue coming up. Dawn made sure to put her graduation on the business schedule. It conflicted with a meeting in Brazil. Oh well, she couldn't go.

"Dawn, you have to go to Brazil," Pepper said from her phone a minute later.

"I'm walking my PhD that weekend, Pepper. Can't."

"We need you there."

"I didn't make it to any other graduations except my one from high school. Don't you think I should walk the important one?"

"Well, yes. They asked that you be there since you can speak the language."

"That's sweet of the cartel lord that's supposedly reformed but I'm walking my PhD and I'm not going to Brazil. This is important to me, Pepper, and I'll translate virtually the rest of the weekend from the system except for during that."

"I guess we can do that."

Tony came off the elevator to stare at her. "Where's our invitations?"

"Printers," she said with a smile.

"Oh, good."

"Tony, that's the Brazil meeting," Pepper said from the phone.

Tony snorted. "Are you really Pepper? Because I don't remember my Pepper being that grumpy about Dawn walking a degree. Beyond that, I've got an honorary one I'm accepting the next weekend and you've scheduled me somewhere else." She moaned. "If you're not Pepper I need to check you for electronics. Or lowering estrogen, something like that."

"I do not!" she complained.

Tony snorted. "Pepper, is it menopause?"

"You're so dead when you come up here."

"If you kill him I have to take over the damn company!" Callia shouted from what sounded like the living room. "Don't you dare, Mom! I'm not hiding his body and he'd have to haunt us so he could finish training Chris and Liz."

"I didn't mean literally, Callia," Pepper said impatiently.

"Bullshit. You've been in a cranky mood all day. I was about to sneak you midol." She came closer. "Really gooey chocolate brownies with hidden midol, Mommy?"

She groaned but nibbled on one, they could hear her chewing. "You can't tell."

"I used the pot brownie recipe to hide it. By the way, when I looked that up, nice save on that with Chris, Auntie."

"Thanks, dear."

Tony shook his head. "I thought it was too." Dawn smiled. "Callia, call your mother's doctor. Tell him she needs a full workup please. We're not sure why she's suddenly turned into a mean Pepper and one who would deny Dawn her rightful walking of a degree. And I'll be right up there." He hung up the phone and looked at her. "I'm attending." She smiled. "I'll break something on your spouses if they're on assignment. And if some major threat happens, I'll tell them they have to wait because we're busy."

"I have kindly asked the two major groups not to attack that weekend as I have to graduate then and it would really piss me off in ways that would make me destroy their whole group. One laughed and one promised, he remembered his own PhD ceremony. He'll do it the next weekend."

"Damn."

"Which we can handle, boss." She smiled. "You can wear your robe over the suit and all that."

"Uh-huh." He walked off. "What if that one tries?"

"I've already started to unravel their organization from the inside. I hired them an assistant." She smiled sweetly. Tony paused to stare at her, eyes wide. "Natasha told her what they needed and I taught her how to slow things down so they weren't efficient any longer. She's more than happily doing all that paperwork for them."

"Oh, no," he said, rubbing his stomach. He suddenly had heartburn.

"Well, organizations and businesses do run on their paperwork, boss." She smirked. "She's doing a fantastic job and once they're reformatted again she'll straighten them out."

"Oh, dear to quote Steve." He walked off, going upstairs. "Pepper, Dawn and Natasha hired HYDRA an admin assistant."

Pepper choked. "Why did she do that?"

Tony stared at her. "To fix their efficiency problem." She went pale and shook her head. "In the negative way," he said more quietly. "Natasha helped."

"Well, I guess they're not going to be attacking during her graduation. I'll try to reschedule both of those."

Tony stared at her. "You're going through the early stages of the change, Pepper. We'll handle it, you'll get what you need, and we won't let you turn that bipolar like some women do."

"Shut up unless you never want laid again," she said dryly then ate some of her brownie. She held up the small plate. "Midol?"

"Sure." He took some to nibble on and curled up next to her to make her feel better. He had to remember, Pepper was nearly his age and women his age were having menopause. They'd handle it though. He could make something if he had to. Thankfully he'd probably miss his daughters going through it.

***

Dawn came home that night sniffly. Natasha stared at her over the lid of her laptop. "What happened?"

"Pepper's having a bad day."

"Did she say something mean?"

"Kinda. She called me a mommy instead of my usual perky assistant self." She kicked off her shoes and walked over to get a hug. "Tony said she's hitting menopause. Her and Mom both."

Natasha patted her on the back. "It will be fine."

"If you're sure."

"I am." She kissed her on the cheek. "Things will be fine and I'll be there tomorrow to help as I compare their things with your lab's ordering to see what they're doing."

"As long as you do it with Stark. That way I don't get into trouble."

"I'll try."

Dawn went to curl up on the couch, smiling when Philip came over to cuddle and nap on her. "Long day too?" He nodded with a yawn. "We can nap together." He yawned again and snuggled into her shoulder to nap. She fell asleep cuddling him.

Natasha smiled and got to work on her current case. It was nice doing it without the field work this time.

Clint came in carrying the mail and his bow. He dropped a box on the table. "I didn't know it was time for checks."

"Those are from a printer so they're probably invitations."

"To...."

Natasha stared at him then pointed at Dawn. "Graduation?"

"Oh!" He looked and they were. He smiled and set them somewhere they wouldn't get messed up. "I heard she asked HYDRA and Doom not to attack that weekend."

"She did and he agreed not to upset her graduation."

"Huh. That's decent of him. So he'll attack Monday?"

"Probably."

"HYDRA?"

"I don't think they're going to be attacking anytime soon." She heard Dawn's phone beep and grabbed it from her bag to look at. She called her. "Pepper, she's napping on the couch with Philip. What needs to be found?" She listened to the complaining. "I believe she said she sent that to your email earlier, Pepper. Then check the new folder since she moved them all. She sent how she fixed it." Pepper saw that and sounded pouty. "I will. You try to rest." She hung up and shook her head. "Definitely the change."

Clint shuddered. "I don't want to think about that topic though I feel very sorry for Bruce and Tony." He checked on the kids then moved to make dinner. Since Dawn had bragged and all, he could make something really nice. Natasha smiled at him for it while she got back to work. Neither of them had ever thought about creating an administrative snafu to take down a group. She looked up the qualifications of that young assistant and paused. "She went to the evil genius school?" Clint quipped with a smirk at her.

"Yes. She is." She congratulated her on how effective she was and promised to write her a report if she needed one for a class. She bragged she was sending in reports of how she was doing but that a recommendation would be great and thanked her.

Clint laughed. It was like Dawn to mentor a future evil genius to give their kids someone to work against. Well, a cranky Dawn with PMS would. Normal, perky Dawn would laugh it off.

***

Callia looked up from her bed that night. "Why can't she be normal?" she muttered. "I wish she wasn't going through all this and confusing Liz and Chris."

A demon appeared. "I have a wacky idea that would work."

Callia stared at her. "You're a wish demon." She smiled and nodded. "I didn't really mean it that way."

"There's a potion that can make them ten years younger."

"They wouldn't be in the same shape, right? Because Grandma had the brain tumor then."

"No, it wouldn't revert them health wise, just physically deage them." She smiled. "I can find you a copy."

"Ingested?"

"No."

"I can work with that. It's probably a bad idea...."

Tony opened the door to stare at them. "Yes, it is a bad idea. She'll kill you for it." He stared at the demon. "As much as I would like that, no."

"Fine, just trying to help. I could've given her the one to make her even younger, around her aunt's age."

"I don't want a mom that young," Callia said. "It'd be weird."

Tony nodded. "Very weird." He stared at the demon. "No thank you." She huffed but disappeared. The scroll was now hidden under Callia's pillow. "I can hear it crinkling, don't you dare."

"I won't. I might show it to her though." She smiled.

"No." He came in and got the potion, taking it before the bad ideas set in. Sometimes he worried his kids had no common sense, then he usually remembered dating half the starlettes in Hollywood within a few years. Sometimes at the same time. So they at least got it naturally from him. He had the scars to prove it. He put it onto the dresser and laid back down. Steve hadn't woken up this time so that was good. Pepper either, and that was better.

***

Pepper woke up in the morning first, which was unusual. She checked Steve, he was apparently in the land of nyquil again. Tony snuffled and shifted over to cling to Steve since she had moved. She tucked them in and headed for the bathroom. She spotted the scroll, taking it with her. That was interesting. Where had Tony found that and why was it on a scroll? She cleaned up and got dressed, coming out to make breakfast. Callia was making toast. "Did you look up a potion for your father?"

"No, I was complaining that you've turned into a neurotic, whiny starlette on crack so a wish demon gave it to me," she muttered. "Dad took it." She was clearly half asleep still.

Pepper stared at her. "What did you just call me?"

Callia looked at her. "You can't find things in your email, even when you know where they are? You blamed Dawn for not looking at your new messages to see what had come in? You blamed Dawn for your coffee spilling on something when you poured it, you put it on your desk, and she was halfway across town, Mom. I've seen less cranky starlettes. Pretty soon you're going to start throwing phones at someone's head for them breathing. And I can't promise Auntie Dawn won't throw it back." She sipped her morning Red Bull, staring at her. "Daddy's nice but I'm too tired to be anything but honest thanks to hairballs from the dog." She finished making her toast and rolled over to the table. Pepper huffed. She looked at her. "You did."

"I did not."

"Bullshit. Watch the security footage."

"Young lady...."

"If the truth hurts you're doing something wrong and I'm hoping like hell I never get PMS like you or Auntie Dawn. Or like my mother's because Spike told me a few demons held off an attack due to her having PMS once. That way she didn't rip them to tiny little pieces instead of killing them."

Pepper glared. "I do not." She pulled up footage and Pepper glared harder. "That's not cute, young lady."

She stared at her. "I haven't been *cute* since I was Liz's age. A bit mean, fairly blunt, kinda pretty, but not cute. Maeve is in her cute years, Mom, not me or Liz."

She huffed. The footage still played and she watched as she totally nagged Dawn about things she hadn't been doing. And wasn't supposed to do. She sniffled.

Chris wandered out, blinking at her. "Mommy, if you're pregnant can I have a baby brother so I'm not the only one? Please?"

She stared at him. "I don't think I'm pregnant, Chris. Why would you think I am?"

"You're watching you and Auntie Dawn videos from work and crying again. You did with Maeve."

"Huh. No, I'm not pregnant. Sorry."

"Then are you sick like Grandma? I'll make something to make you feel better. I promise I'll make something to make you not sick." Callia stopped him and hugged him. "You'll help, right?"

"She's not sick like Grandma. Mom had a bad day yesterday, that's all." He relaxed and she cuddled him.

Pepper came out to get him. "I'm not sick, sweetheart. It's okay." He nodded, cuddling her. "If I get sick that way I'll let you build me something great to help me." He relaxed and snuggled into her shoulder. She patted him on the back. Callia stared at her. "I need to see someone about those mood swings." She made Chris his favorite breakfast and let him eat it, going in to wake up Tony. She sniffled. "Chris just asked me if I was sick like Joyce and he'd make something to make me better."

He pulled her down to cuddle. "We'll figure out this new level of female hormones too, Pep," he said quietly. "That way you don't scare the kids or Dawn." She nodded, cuddling him.

Callia rolled to the doorway. "First he asked if she would give him a baby brother this time because he needed to even out the odds." She rolled off again.

"No, I don't think you can do that," Steve muttered, flipping over to rub Pepper's back since she was against Tony's other side. "We'll figure all that stuff out." Tony grinned at him.

***

Two days later, Dawn had enough. She looked at Linda then at Pepper. "I'm taking the day off," she announced.

"You can't do that!" Pepper complained. "You have to ask for days off, Dawn."

Dawn looked at her. "I'm taking the day off before I tie you down and feed you more midol. Really, I am." She stared at her. Pepper huffed. "I can't deal with this on top of the headache and the yelling you're doing over stupid shit that has no consequence, that neither Linda or I did or had any part of doing, is making the dizziness come back. So I'm taking today off."

"You can be fired for unauthorized days off," Pepper said.

"Okay." She got her stuff and walked off. Pepper stared, mouth open. Then she flopped down and started to cry. She was trying really hard but it wasn't working. Linda got her some tea and closed the office door for her, then went on break. She wasn't sure she should tell someone about that. She wasn't going to gossip but maybe someone else should know? She decided to tell MB. She knew Dawn and Pepper pretty well and Linda had lunch with her at least once a week. She could figure that out for her. And her former boss because Gloria handled legal matters for Dawn too. That way they could work that out.

***

Twenty minutes later, MB walked into Tony's lab, slapping him on the arm. He winced as he stared at her. "Pepper just drove Dawn off."

"Crap. How widespread is the gossip?"

"Linda told me and she said she had to tell Gloria in case it affected something she was handling for her legally."

"I think Dawn has her on retainer too." He pulled up the footage and sighed. "That's so bad."

"Is that the change? I'm having mine removed before I get to that point."

"That just speeds it up," Tony said dryly. He went to calm down Pepper. She was trying to handle some of Dawn's work and failing. She had no idea what Dawn was working ahead on. She looked up at him, trying to hide the confused look. "We'll figure it out and get her back."

"She's mean. She left."

"You yelled at her about things that aren't her fault. What did you expect her to do? Even the dog's hiding from you, Pepper." He watched her huff and get up to get some water from her fridge. "When is your appointment?"

"Yesterday. He said it's not."

"Bullshit." She scowled at him. He stared back. She sat down with a huff. "I'll talk to Dawn tomorrow. For now, you probably have everything you need for the next few days. We'll use it to calm down and deal with things." She nodded, swallowing hard. Then drank some water to cover it up. He went to call her doctor. He wouldn't give him facts but assured him Pepper was too young for that and she might just be having a mental snap. Which meant Tony sent her on vacation and then went to talk to Dawn. He unfired her in the system too and locked Pepper out of that system for now. He also told Gloria Dawn was on vacation, she was not fired nor had she quit. Gloria said that was a good thing since she wasn't on retainer for her. Tony said he'd mention that to her when he took her to lunch.

***

Dawn walked off the elevator and put down her briefcase then got something to drink and went to take a bath. The kids were with Beya in the gym, she had heard Philip cackling in there when she had come in. She could have a few hours uninterrupted to sulk and make plans. She had no idea that Stark had just called for backup from her spouses and Steve. Which meant that Bruce and her mother stepped into it too. She ran a warm bath with bubbles and slid into it with a sigh of pleasure.

***

Tony looked at Bruce when he walked in with Natasha and Clint. "Bruce...."

"She's my stepdaughter, Tony. What happened?" He put up the footage. They all sighed. "Joyce is having lesser mood swings."

"Pepper's turned almost psychotic." He looked at Clint. "Where is she?"

"Having a glass of wine in the tub with bubbles." He looked at him. "Want us to tie up Pepper for you?"

"Don't tempt me. She's going on vacation. Dawn's officially on vacation. I undid her quitting."

"Okay," Clint agreed.

Natasha sighed. "I hope to never go through that myself. They make medicines."

"Her doctor doesn't seem to think it is. Her bloodwork says differently. Her doctor wanted to put her on prozac."

"Maybe for a few weeks," Bruce said.

"Pepper doesn't need it."

Natasha rubbed her head, frowning. "What is that smell?"

"What smell?" the guys asked.

Clint stared at Natasha. "Why are you going into battle mode?" he muttered.

"JARVIS, scan for something being put out?"

"I believe there may be, sir. Women all over the building and the city are being more aggressive. There's been a number of reports of women fighting in the streets."

Clint looked at Natasha. Who had shifted her stance to more of what she used during battles. "Okay. Any idea?" he asked.

"No," Tony said. "JARVIS, where is it coming from?"

"I believe from across the river. The majority of the incidences are coming in the direction of the wind and spreading. Though, Pepper's incidences are not caused by that. She's upstairs sneering at Liz's outfit, which is part of it I believe."

"Liz, come see me please," Tony called over the intercom. "Callia, bring me your sister."

"In a minute," she called. They could hear her snapping back at Pepper, who huffed off crying. A few minutes later Liz and Callia came in, Liz riding on her sister's lap. "There's a shelter in place going on."

"Good!" He took Liz to cuddle. "The bad air is making your mom upset. She'll apologize later."

"I'm adorable," she said with a pout.

Tony looked at her outfit. "It doesn't match very well but you look good in it anyway." Liz pouted but cuddled him. "Callia...."

"Maeve and Chris are in my new lab space. I've got the air scrubbers on and locked all adults but emergency personnel out." She took Liz and brought her back there.

Tony looked at Bruce. "Any idea?"

"Not yet." He settled in to track it backwards. "That's a chemical company that had a fire the other week but it's coming from behind them."

Tony pointed. "That's a chemical storage area for their company. That's where they had the fire."

"Okay, so we've got a chemically induced rage problem in females," Steve said. "How do we cure it?"

Tony looked at him. "I don't think we can."

Tara stomped in. "Stark, I need a plant-based filter made."

"What sort, Tara?" She handed it to him and he looked it over. "How big?"

"Big enough for the bridge?"

"It's in the air," Bruce said. She growled. He stared at her. "Don't, Tara. Don't provoke him." She huffed. "We'll do what we can but we're not sure how to help yet."

"Those plants clear things out of the air."

"Okay, that's great," Tony said. "But we're finding it halfway to Pennsylvania right now." She groaned and stomped off again. "Bruce, go make sure it's there." He nodded, taking some equipment from the science labs and going. "Romanoff, guard the building please. This is a good time for someone to do something stupid." She nodded. "Barton, talk to your wife?"

"I'm going to." He went to talk to her. The kids were upstairs and Dawn was reading to them from the tub. She was covered with a towel so the kids couldn't see anything but they were watching the book she was using anyway. "Guys, can I have the mommy?" Philip blew a kiss and rolled the girls in their walkers out to play in the living room. He closed the door. "There's some sort of chemical accident in New Jersey," he said quietly.

"Is this the start of a joke?"

"No. It's creating an aggression problem in women all over the city." He turned on the tv in there and changed the channel. She groaned. "So part of that was...."

"Pepper's hormones. If I still have a job I'll go back to it tomorrow, when she's calmed down. I did this once when she was carrying Liz due to the mood swings." She shifted and looked at him. "I can't take that."

"I wouldn't have," he agreed, leaning down to kiss her. "Tony said you're on vacation. She's going on vacation." She huffed. "If she's allowed out of the city."

"Probably not. What's Tara doing?"

"She wants to make a plant based filter. It's all over the city."

Dawn nodded. "I'm not feeling more aggressive than usual." He grinned. "Let me call Tara."

"Okay." He took another kiss. "We'll help mediate between you, Pepper, and Stark. If not, well you can do the home schooling."

She smirked. "Maybe. Or I might just start a great business." He smiled and left her alone. She called Tara once she had on the headset. "It's me. What's going on?" She listened. "Tara, if it's in the air, we'd have to super grow a hedge." She grimaced. "You know what, I'm not being hit and I'm in the tub with my lavender bubbles. Try that?" Tara sniffed some. The lavender canceled out this new stuff. "Okay so we'll deal with it. Would a good, hard rain help ease it?" She nodded. "We can, yup." She got out, rinsing off the bubbles. She put on her robe and went to her closet to get something she could work in. "I'll meet you at SHIELD." She hung up and got dressed, walking out to kiss the kids on the head. "Beya, we're going to handle the super aggression going on thanks to New Jersey."

She snorted and nodded. "Please do. There's a bunch of idiots."

"They can be." She walked out and nearly got pounced. She punched one of the women who shrieked and tried to scratch her. "Nope, not today." She got a cab and went to SHIELD. "The air is flowing over where Tara said there's a chemical fire in New Jersey," she told him. "Lavender is helping release some of that problem, or blocking it." He nodded quickly, calling that to his boss. Within an hour, all the cabs in the city would smell a lot better with lavender fresheners. She walked into SHIELD and waved at them. "Handling the issue."

"Tara's upstairs, Dawn," one of the guards said. "Sign in."

She did and went up there. Joyce was staring at the incident map. "Mom." Joyce looked at her. "Lavender."

"Okay. People, let's get some lavender scent put throughout the building." They moved to do that. Tara smiled at Dawn. "How did we find this out?"

"Pepper was having a hissy at me about something there was no way I was even remotely involved in so I went home to take a bubble bath." Joyce stared at her. "It got to the point where she blamed me for spilling her coffee yesterday and I was halfway across town, Mom. Hell no."

"I can see that reason. What will you be doing instead?" It was clearly time to talk her daughter down out of her stupid pride.

"I already have a few business interests, I can run them more closely and teach the kids until I get bored." Joyce nodded. They watched as the female agents all started to calm down. "Let's go make it rain, Tara. Then we'll talk to people about putting up a huge fire in the way of the wind stream that's full of lavender." She nodded. "Mom, talk to Stark. Clint said there was a chemical fire there and he thinks that's where it's coming from."

"I can do that." She called him. "Steve, give me good news about Stark having an idea how to stop it?" She listened. "Can we help them clean it up, tent it, something?" He nodded. "This is the security of the city, Steve. If we have to, we can tent it on them and they can use Hazmat gear. If they fuss, yay." She listened and looked at Maria. "He's sending you the pictures of the wind stream. Bruce is there and taking measurements."

She nodded, getting into her computer to find them. "It may not be the primary cause but it's helping," she said. "Doctor Banner isn't finding the same chemicals in the air in the same strength. He's looking for the start point, Director."

Joyce nodded. "Keep me updated when he finds out how."

"I can do so." She tracked the wind back with Stark and had him fly out in his suit to take readings since it was over open water. He found the initial cause and Bruce was finding the things that were strengthening and adding to it. "Ma'am, we have sightings of a ship that is pumping chemicals into the air. Iron Man stated that the person doing it was trying to promote a female pheromone response. I believe it was the same person that dosed your husband." Joyce growled, eyes narrowing. "Doctor Banner concurs and said that the two plants in the way are adding and changing it so it's aggression related instead. He's having the one that's still operating shut down. They're arguing but he's called in the FBI since they're trying to investigate. He found out they have a minute chemical leak in their storage area and the burned, altered remains of that other one is what's changing it."

"Have them tent the fire related one and shut that one down even if he has to smash it," she ordered. Maria relayed that. Joyce called the head of the FBI, who was on site to deal with it. They decided to shut down the company for a few days under threat of the Hulk destroying their building and their storage area was tented for them. The other one was tented and shielded by some of Stark's new shield designs. Joyce relaxed. "Let me know when it starts to go down and if Stark has to blow up that ship."

"He's got the Coast Guard coming and they're coming in Hazmat suits as well, an all male crew just in case," Maria reported. "Though he did promise he was going to blow her up."

Joyce nodded. "I'm not going to get near her because I'll beat her to death even without that."

***

Upstairs on the roof, Dawn and Tara were checking the local weather. They were pulling in clouds from higher up, toward Canada. Dawn called two news stations. "It's Dawn Summers and I'm acting on behalf of SHIELD. There is going to be a sudden, intense, cold rain happening within an hour. It is to wash some of the chemical stink coming from New Jersey out to stop that aggression problem. That will *help* reduce it but the smell of lavender blocks it from stuffing up our noses. I have no idea how you handle that. For all I care, they can do a huge bonfire with lavender soap and oils," she said dryly.

"We're doing a huge rain storm to help. People are working on the cause. For right now, warn people about the rain and that it's going to screw up projected weather patterns for a few days." She hung up and called the Mayor's office. "It's Dawn Summers for SHIELD. We are working on it. We're starting locally with a huge rain to start cleaning it out of the air. Lavender blocks it from affecting us as hard. SHIELD is looking at the cause. This is a stopgap. Within an hour. We're having to pull Canadian air." She hung up on the complaining and took Tara's hand to work with her. Callia rolled up a few minutes into their working, taking her aunt's hand. She looked at her.

"The coven's pulling from the southern winds to do the lower parts of the wind stream. I told them what Dad found." Dawn nodded and they started the rain. It was a cold, chilling rain but it helped. They already could feel it lessening. Callia sighed, looking at her. "Dad unfired you."

"That's great." She looked at her. "I'm forcefeeding her something."

"I did with the midol." She smiled. "I think her doctor suggested prozac."

"Maybe." They watched. "We need a huge lavender bonfire over there." She called Bruce. "For some reason lavender blocks the scent." He grunted and nodded passing that on. "It's raining over here." She helped Callia inside. Her wheelchair had an optional motorized climbing feature now. "Chris?" she asked her.

"Me. Stairs suck ass and it might be necessary." Tara hugged her and they went to dry off in the changing areas. They reported to the main floor. "It's raining," she announced.

"Any scent that works beyond lavender?" Maria Hill asked. "They wanted to know."

"I noticed my lavender bubble bath blocked it," Dawn admitted.

She reported that to Bruce and Stark, who said they'd figure it out. They started a huge bonfire of lavender oil with lavender bushes on the side of the last chemical company that was contributing. Everyone would smell like grandma's sheets for days but if it helped.....

An hour later the city was reporting it did help and so did the rain. The weather men were going nuts. They had been warned and were revising their opinions for the next week or so. The coven smoothed out some of theirs. Dawn and Tara went up to smooth out some of the weather they had yanked after a few hours. That caused a new fit but it meant it wouldn't affect other areas. That inward-water bound air stream was being fixed too. Turns out they had a witch working with them. Stark zapped her with a repulsor and she went down. Tara and Dawn let the coven undo her work since they were closer.

***

Tony landed and let the system take his suit from him. He looked at the waiting people. "They'll keep the big lavender bonfire going for a while. FEMA tried to step in but it wasn't that sort of disaster." He put up the results of what had happened.

Bruce came off the elevator, putting up his own. "Here's how it changed. By the way, the head of the FBI yelled at Joyce for telling me to smash them if I had to."

Tony nodded. "It might've caused more problems but yay." Bruce grinned. "I'm hoping whoever examines the storage areas shows up to start checking everyone's."

"Is there someone?"

"There should be. I'd hope there was." They shared a look and a shrug, letting Tony do a web search.

Chris looked over. "I've already sent them a very public message from me, as heir to the Stark legacy, and shared up-to-date information from SHIELD that Grandma said I could. They said they're going to be there in a few hours to look at their storage leak and that fire site." He grinned. "They called me an uppity bastard just like you, Dad."

"Was it an ex-girlfriend?" Bruce asked with a smile.

"Yup."

"Thankfully the FBI arrested the science bimbo," Tony said, getting them some water and sitting down. "Where's your mother?"

"Locked in her bathroom having a bubble bath." He looked at him. "You'll need to unglue the door. Maeve's in the daycare so I didn't have to change girl diapers."

"Why did you seal her in there?" Tony asked.

"Because she started to throw a fit and rant and scream and cry about the air." He looked at his father. "If girls are like that, why do boys like them?"

"Most of the time girls aren't like that, kiddo. Most women only have those things a few times in their lives."

"Well, maybe I'll turn gay then because I don't want to deal with that again. Dr. Phil says gay sex can be normally fun." He went back to his lessons. "Callia's at SHIELD with Auntie and Auntie Tara."

"That's fine. They'll protect each other," Tony said. He and Bruce settled in to teach Chris some new things and wait on Callia to get back. Callia had sent everyone home for the day and started the air scrubbers so the building was pretty safe.

Tara walked off the elevator with Callia, who had paused to pick up lunch apparently. She smiled. "Nice work, guys."

"Thanks," Bruce said. "Nice work with the rain storm too. It's brutal but better."

Tara grinned. "Thanks, Bruce. Tony, she was very helpful."

"I'm glad." He hugged his girl. "Go get a laser and unglue your mother's bathroom door?"

Callia opened her bag and ate a fry, shaking her head as she chewed. "Not yet. Let her have a nice, warm bubble bath and all that, Dad. She could use the spa day."

"That's not nice," Bruce warned. Callia pulled up footage, making him wince. "No wonder you glued the door shut, Chris."

He nodded. He looked at his sister. "Are you going to turn into that sort of girl?"

"Damn I hope not or I'm having all those nasty girl parts ripped the fuck out so I never go through it." She ate another fry.

"Then I might not start to like guys instead." He went back to his worksheet.

"Like dad, you'll probably like both," Callia said dryly. She looked at her aunt, who was blushing. "Mom's enough to make me not like girls." She shrugged. Tony hugged her. "It's okay, Dad. I figure I might be bi since you are and it'll be okay. I'm good with that." She went back to her lunch. She even let Chris steal her spare cheeseburger.

Tara shook her head. "It's not always that easy, guys."

"I can ignore boobs," Chris assured her. "I have that Stark focus."

"Which most Starks use to stare at breasts," Tony said dryly. "And quit calling them that."

"Fine, sorry," Chris mumbled.

Callia smiled. "At least you won't grow some."

"That's probably a good thing," he complained. "I'd be scary." He ate more of his burger. "The Mayor called six times and I told him you weren't back yet, Dad."

"Then he's probably on his way here. He'd have someone tell him when I flew back."

"He's huffing up to the front of the building now, sir," JARVIS told him.

"Great." He went down to the office to talk to him. "What?"

"Your assistant works with SHIELD?"

"She's an adjunct Avenger and yes. Why?"

"She announced she was working with SHIELD."

"When it's the fate of the world, SHIELD moves into action, even adjunct members get called in. I went out as an Avenger. Bruce went out as an Avenger and SHIELD scientist. Dawn went as an adjunct SHIELD member." He shrugged. "That's what we do in emergencies. I turn into Iron Man, Banner turns into the Hulk, Dawn turns into an adjunct Avenger. Steve turns into Captain America. It's not a secret we work with SHIELD during the big things. She's been in every battle here in New York, including helping move people out of harm's way during the Chitarui invasion."

The Mayor blinked. "She was?"

"Yes."

"We never noted her."

"Good. She'd hate that."

"Is that because she's your assistant?" he demanded, staring at him.

"No. Dawn hates that sort of attention." Dawn came off the elevator and got into her desk. "Don't you dare."

"I'm getting my personal laptop, Tony, not my work one."

"Take them both." She stared at him. He smiled. "You're on vacation but still."

"I...."

"Yay. By the way, the kids glued her in the bathroom." She snorted, smiling some as she shook her head. "Yeah, they felt the same way."

Dawn smiled at the Mayor. "Problems with the rain storm?"

"How much do you work for SHIELD?"

"I'm an adjunct Avenger. I take over Hawkeye's place when he's unable to get to a battle or I'm there in case it takes magic. Not like they pay me to be fashionable and perky."

"They'd better never try to steal you to be their fashionable, perky assistant," Tony complained. She patted him on the arm and left with both laptops. He looked at the mayor again. "Pepper had a mood swing so she took today off."

"Pregnant?"

"No. She's forty-five."

"Oh." He nodded. "My wife was hell for four years."

"There's medicine for that," Tony said dryly. He looked at him. "We don't do it for the medals. Usually, all of us duck medals like they're the plague."

"I'll keep that in mind. How long?"

"We've set up air quality meters and as long as the FBI doesn't tamper with them, which I'm not counting on; it should be a few days to fully clear it. At least it's a good, clean scent. It might make the city smell less like stale urine and cabs."

The Mayor shook his head. "Other cities smell the same."

"Some smell worse. Really." The Mayor walked off shaking his head. Tony called Dawn. She had to have a girlish idea to help Pepper. And her mother since Bruce had said she was going through the same hormones. She had a few ideas and so did Dr. Pigalli when he talked to her about it. She even ordered them so he could hand them to Pepper. He went upstairs with one of his daughter's cutting lasers, going to unseal the bathroom. Pepper was pouting in a tub full of bubbles so he kicked the door shut and put the bottles on the vanity. He looked at her. "Talked to Dr. Pigalli."

"I'm sorry."

"We know you can't help it. Joyce is doing the same thing and she's three years older than you are." He stared at her. "These are the hormone replacement therapy meds and a very light valium to take when you get too bitchy," he said quietly. "She said a lot of women go on a light dose of prozac during this time due to the mood swings that cause them hell."

"I don't want to."

"I know. That's why we went with a Valium 5." She nodded. "As needed. The HRT will help the other things." He pointed at them. "They're both once a day and if you have to go up you can." He leaned down to kiss her. "I unfired Dawn. She's officially on vacation this week," he said quietly. "I gave Linda a few days off too. She nearly hugged me, Pepper."

"I didn't mean to...."

"We know. Linda said she understood, she had seen her mother's change. Dawn's getting it from both ends." She nodded, sinking lower. He kissed her again and smiled. "We'll work it out. Within a few days you should be closer to an even keel. That'll make Chris quit swearing off women for life and Callia quit vowing to remove her girl parts so she doesn't have to deal with that." Pepper let out a bitter snort, looking pouty. "Okay?" She nodded. "Good." He kissed her again and let her soak.

She took the first pills and settled in to write Dawn an apology email. Then one to Linda. She hadn't meant to hurt them or upset them. Dawn accepted and Linda's email back said she had seen it before but she was nicer than her mother's since her mother had nearly stabbed her with a kitchen knife. Pepper wrote back that she'd never be that bad or Dawn could tie her down. She put her tablet aside and ran more hot water. It was good and she had needed a day off. Things were insane and she was losing track of things.

***

Chris looked at his uncle that night when Tony had invited everyone over for a family dinner. "Uncle Clint?" He looked down at him. "Is having two wives different than having two husbands?"

"Kinda. Why?"

"Someone on tv who then got shouted at about Mormons and polygamy."

"Oh. Them. It's different from most people's viewpoints, and even though they claim that their book of faith discourages it, almost all the relationships are. They don't like to admit it."

"Oh, so they're the Candyland people."

"Huh?"

"Auntie Dawn explained to sissy about people who think they live in Candyland instead of here. She told us about that when we started to have those same thoughts."

"Yes, they are," Dawn called, smiling at him. "They definitely are." Chris smiled at her. "And we care not a bit about them or their viewpoints."

Clint kissed her. "Me either." She smiled. "Nat, do you care about them?"

"Not particularly. I tend to mock them most of the time." She smiled at Chris. "Having two wives is easier than having two husbands. He only has to pay attention to us. Your mother has to soothe your father and Steve when they argue."

"You guys don't argue?" Pepper asked.

"Not usually," Dawn said. "Sometimes but we also send the kids to Grandma." She smiled at her mother.

"It makes sense to us too," Bruce assured them.

"Half the time, Dawn and Natasha argue and I just watch it in case they get into a real argument then I make them kiss and make up," Clint told Chris with a grin. Natasha actually blushed. "That's why two wives are easier."

"It'd be nice if I could do that," Pepper said.

"Anytime you want, Pepper," Tony quipped. Steve was giving him a dirty look. "She can."

"Maybe." Pepper smiled and he kissed her.

"See, I get to watch them do that all I want," Clint said with a grin.

"Wow. Daddy kisses Stepmom sometimes and he and Mom kiss sometimes. They're pretty together."

"They are," Clint agreed. "The only problem is when they're having huge problems and then you have to baby them. Sometimes you don't have enough attention for that."

Dawn nodded. "Sometimes," she agreed. Clint kissed her, making her smile. "It probably won't come up again though."

"Probably not," Natasha agreed.

Steve looked at her. "You could...."

"Probably not," she assured him.

"Fine." He smiled. She gave him a pointed look. Dawn was laughing behind her magazine.

Callia rolled out from the kitchen. "Salad's done and I only agreed to make that part of dinner." Tony got up to get the rest to put on the grill. Callia transferred out of her wheelchair and onto a lounge chair, stretching out with a sigh of pleasure. "I needed the sun."

Dawn reached over to hand her the sunscreen. "It's late but still bright."

She put some on and got comfy. She fell asleep there. It had been a long day. Someone would get her up for food.

Pepper looked over. "We need to start enforcing a normal set of hours," she told Tony. "She's going to have hell in school."

"She has a study hall/nap time right after her individual gym/PT time," Tony said. "That way she can do her extra physical therapy she's making herself do then nap. She's only taking one regular class with the other kids and that's a history class, Pepper. The rest she and the other gifted students are in a classroom working on their own things and doing the video lectures. They have a teacher there to help if they get stuck but she could probably sleep through one if she had to. And yes, I'm going to remind her she has a month before she has to start being up all day long." Pepper smiled at him. "When are you getting her uniforms?"

"Next week. Is she going to stay in the back brace?"

"No. The physical therapist thinks it's not necessary unless she's so tired she's slumping and hurting herself. He did think she's pushing herself too hard." Pepper nodded she agreed. "She's doing good though. They all helped her work on the leg that she got to move a tiny bit on her own for the last few days."

"That's good," she decided. "Is there a PT there?"

"The head gym teacher is a licensed trainer," Dawn said. "That individual gym is with a few other kids that need the same sort of help due to accidents and one other kid in a wheelchair due to a horse riding accident. He sent a letter requesting her medical records so I put him on with the physical therapist to tell him what he needed to know without giving those over."

"That I liked," Tony agreed.

"Then I guess that's okay, as long as her physical therapist agrees," Pepper said. Dawn nodded she'd make sure. She smiled at her. "I'm sorry."

"I know. It's not your fault your body's going out of whack but if you ever scream at me for daring to go to the bathroom again I'm taking another vacation day."

"I can agree to that." She smiled at her. "Linda too. Thank you for clearing her out."

"She needed one," Tony said. He looked at Joyce.

"Maria's already handed me pamphlets on HRT and other matters," Joyce said with a smirk at her daughter.

Dawn looked at her. "Remember when you were so sick after your first few radiation treatments and I had to teleport the pills into your stomach?" Joyce burst out laughing.

"That's a handy skill to have," Tony admitted.

"She couldn't swallow thanks to all the throwing up she did," Dawn said with a grin. "It helped a lot. The nurses were happy she was getting what she needed."

"The nurses called it weird but effective. It meant less time on the IV drip." Dawn nodded. "They had her help a few others that way too." Dawn grinned. "It did help."

"It did," Dawn agreed.

Bruce smiled. "I'm sure we'll handle it, Dawn."

"Okay." She grinned at the girls. Maeve was pouting at them. "What's wrong, Maeve?" She pulled her out to check and cuddle. "You're all pouty and Mira's been sucking on your thumb for you. So what's wrong?" She patted Dawn's necklace. "Oh, you want something shiny." She found something in her purse, handing it over. "Would that help?" The baby smiled and shook it, showing it made noise. She got put back into the playpen. Lexi and Mira got their own shiny rattles.

Tony looked then at her. "Silver?"

"Yup." She smiled. "Stepdad, how's Oz? He wouldn't have breakfast with me yesterday."

"He does meditations from sun up to about ten, Dawn, and he's good. He said to apologize for that and to invite him to lunch."

"I can do that."

"When you come back next week," Tony said.

Dawn smiled. "You gave me a whole week off?"

"Yup. Linda's got Friday on to make sure we're not stuck over the weekend." Dawn grinned. "You can teach her the monthly filing next month."

"Sure." She settled in with her book. Mira grumbled but found her rattle she had dropped. She spotted Daddy staring at her and grinned, waving it for him.

"It's really pretty, Mira. You handle rattles very well." She beamed and shook it some more.

Natasha smiled. "You like flirting with your father and we like that about you." The baby cackled and went back to playing with Lexi and Maeve.

"She is very flirty at times," Dawn agreed. Lexi beamed at her so she waved. "Hi, Lexi." Maeve looked at her. "Hi, Maeve. Hi, Mira." Mira huffed but played. "Fine, you have a favorite mommy too."

"At least it's not as bad as Philip's was. He'd barely let you change him," Natasha said. Dawn smirked at her. "I did try."

"You also dressed him this morning." Her son was wearing red and black. Natasha had dressed him.

Philip looked over. "She said I look pretty."

"You do, son. Why do you never wear that blue shirt I got you?"

He shrugged. "Not go."

"It goes with tan, black, and gray, son," Clint said. If only so they didn't have to shop for his son anytime soon. Who knows what Philip would bring home this time. Philip huffed but nodded he'd try to wear it tomorrow. He looked at Dawn. "Doesn't he have enough clothes?"

"Not if we take out all the stuff that's too small. Then we'll have to do it with the girls in about a month."

He groaned. "They don't need that many clothes, Dawn."

She nodded. "They won't have a huge growth spurt for about six months this time."

"Don't remind me. I have to clean out Maeve's closet and go for her and Liz," Pepper sighed. She looked at Chris. "And you it looks like."

"I like these swim pants," he complained. "Tough."

"Excuse you?" Tony asked him.

"Fine. I get new ones that look like these?"

"If I can," Pepper agreed with a smirk. "Just for that, no dresses."

"Awww!" Philip nudged him. "Have kilt?"

"We'll see," Steve said.

"Philip's is too small," Natasha said. She was happy about that.

"I get new one," Philip told her with a smirk.

Dawn looked at him. "Who did you go shopping with, son?"

"Guy with swords but no mask and no splotchy spots."

"What?" she asked.

"I thought he looked like Deadpool," Clint said.

"His clone's over there," Dawn told him.

"We need to check on that. He was spotted taking out Barney." They shared a look.

"I'll get him again if I need to." She opened a viewing portal. "Deadpool, is your clone with you?"

"Yup. We just ate tacos," he said, smiling at her. "Cute bathing suit."

"Thanks, Stark pool rules." She looked at him. "We thought we spotted him here in this realm."

"Nope. Does that mean I have an evil clone? Because that's seriously great."

Clint nodded. "We think you might."

"Cool!" He looked over. "Hey, other me, we have an evil other us."

"Great!" he said happily. His mask was the backwards version of the original's, red where his was black and black where his was red. "Is he in the mask too?"

"Not the other day. He was pretending to be a doctor," Clint said. "Took out the clone of my brother."

"Awww. Did he eliminate the bad guy?" the original Deadpool asked.

"We're not sure if he's not making a new one," Dawn admitted.

"Even better!" He smiled. "Thanks, Dawn. I'll get lots of bragging about my evil clone. Send him over if you want."

"I can do that." She wiggled her fingers. "Philip." He came over to look, smiling and waving. "We found out because he took the son shopping."

"Awww." He smiled. "I saw you when you were first born from my mean dark angel there."

Philip smirked. "JARVIS had film," he said happily. "You're kinda neat." Deadpool, both of them, smiled at him for that. "Have you seen sissies?"

"Not yet."

He picked up Lexi to show her. "My direct sissy Lexi."

"You're pretty," he cooed.

She grinned and gummed her new rattle.

"Dawn, is she a meta?"

"We think so. We have a tiny subspace portal here in the building."

"That's so cool!" he cooed.

Philip got Mira. "Is my other sissy by Mommy 'Tasha. This is Mira."

"You're pretty too," he cooed. She blinked at him and cackled, waving her rattle. "You're going to like weapons, I can already tell." She batted at her sister. "Yup, you two are like your mommies. That's wonderful."

Philip grinned at him. "Some day I use self-defense class to beat up on boys for them. Boys like pretty girls with boobs." Dawn swatted him. "Hey!"

"I told you not to call them that."

"They are."

"Yay," Dawn said with a smirk.

He huffed but looked at the neat 'uncle' guy. "Mommy fussy sometimes about boobies."

"Some girls do," the other Deadpool agreed. Mira squealed. "I'm sorry, did we ignore you for a minute?" She grinned at him. "Wow, Dawn."

"Yeah. They're cute little hellions in the making. They'll be like their mommy. All flirty and happy and perky and fashionable, but yet deadly when necessary." The guys both shivered. "Thought I'd mention the other clone and I'll send him over if I find him."

"Looking forward to it." He winked. "Send pictures of the kids."

"I can do that." She smirked and closed the portal. She looked at Mira. "Want changed?" She pouted at her. "I know but it's okay. Want me to change you?"

Clint got up with a groan and took them to change. If Mira had dirtied herself, Lexi wasn't far behind usually. Though the reverse was always true, anything Lexi did, Mira had to do better. Philip helped him. He gave him a hug for that help and he went back to helping Chris color. The girls got put back down together. "Pepper, want me to change Maeve?"

"I can," Chris said, hopping up.

"No you can't," Steve said, taking her to change. "You're too little."

"Callia did credible attempts at it when she was his age," Dawn quipped. "She used to help Tara with the twins."

Steve looked at her. "How close did she get?"

"She was never big enough to reach the changing table so she'd drag in a chair and was usually on cleaning them up when Tara got there."

"Huh."

"She did the same thing with Philip," Tony agreed. "Then Chris. Which is how she realized Chris was circumcised and they weren't."

Philip looked at him. "What's circumcised?"

"Why you wondered about Chris looking different," Bruce said.

"Oh! Okay. Thanks, Grandpa!" He grinned at his buddy and they got back to coloring. He had gotten Chris a kilt of his own so they could match tomorrow. His would go with that blue shirt Mommy wanted him to wear. He knew Chris had a nice blue shirt too.

Clint looked at his wife. "You know I'm still jealous, right?" She blew a kiss but grinned and blushed a tiny bit.

"As am I. We will be proving that she is ours later," Natasha said, turning the page on her e-reader's screen. "As only I have to go to work tomorrow."

"I'm going to daycare," Philip announced. They all stared at him. "Play with Chris!"

"Fine," Natasha agreed. "I can drop you off on the way but that means getting up earlier." He shrugged and got back to his coloring.

"Stark, is the food ready yet so I can eat that instead of the wife?" Clint joked with a grin for him.

"Nearly and we do have spare rooms, Barton," he quipped back. "We don't need to see you eating her. We might have to protest."

"Daddy would not chew on Mommy," Philip said impatiently. "She'd swat him good and quit being wiggly and flirty for him."

"Probably, depends on where he bit me," Dawn said, looking at Clint, who smirked at that challenge.

Xander and Phil finally got there, and Phil put down the kids so they could run over to pounce the boys. Xander handed over their contribution to dinner. Stark put them on the grill too. "Sorry we're late. Melissa was having a crisis."

"I didn't match," Melissa said. "Mommy likes me to match." She carefully laid down and got into the coloring with the boys.

"Why are you wearing a skirt?" Joyce asked.

"Mommy Maria said I had to learn to wear one sometime."

"Playing isn't the time for that," Natasha said. Melissa smirked at her. "Stark, does Callia have some shorts she can borrow?"

"Probably." He got her some. "Put them on under the skirt so you quit flashing people." Melissa wiggled into them and smoothed the skirt down over them then got back to playing. The others were sucking up to Joyce and Bruce since they hadn't seen them recently. Tony started to pull food off the grill with Clint's help. Phil set the table for him and it was good. They could relax and eat, and ignore the lavender scent that floated up at them.

***

Clint got up long enough in the morning to watch his son pick out his clothes. He blinked a few times at the kilt and the one he was packing. "Why do you need two?"

"One's for Chris."

Clint yawned. Mira had kept him up all night and from snacking on Dawn. "Try that one on since the one you're wearing is too big?" He wiggled out of it and put on the other one. That one fit so he packed the other one with a grin for his father and pulled down that blue shirt. It was a polo shirt and it went well with the tan cargo kilt. Philip put on socks and his boots, letting his father tie them for him. Then he ran out with his backpack to bounce around Mommy Natasha until she fed him. Clint went to the bathroom then back to bed. He heard Mira fuss but Natasha was handling the girls. Dawn woke up with a yawn when he nudged her. "Go to the bathroom. They're about to go to daycare." She got up to do that, putting on a robe on the way out so she could kiss and hug all the kids. Lexi cooed at her and Dawn cuddled her extra. Mira was still huffing at her so she'd let Nat handle her for a few minutes. "Daycare," Clint called.

"Fine," Natasha agreed, packing up the girls to go to daycare as well. She looked at her son. "Why did you pick today to wear that?"

"Chris and I match."

"Oh." She was not going to ask her son how he knew he and Chris Stark were going to match. For all she knew they had went telepathic with each other somehow due to something Callia had created. She nodded and got them down to the SUV, taking them to the tower so she could go to SHIELD. She wouldn't put it past a Stark. She had to file reports on how HYDRA was falling apart.

Dawn grinned at Clint. "Want me to make coffee?"

"Later. C'mere." She took off the robe and came back in to cuddle him. This was a great sleeping in and they could do more in a few hours, when they woke up.

***

Philip smiled at Miss Nancy. "Me go wake up Chris."

"Let him sleep, Philip."

"I bringed him stuff." He held up his pack with a grin and ran out, going to the elevator. He knew how to get upstairs. He wasn't a baby. He ran off and hugged his Uncle Tony as he ran past him. "Bringed stuff for Chris."

"Okay then you have to go back to the daycare," he said firmly. "You can't stay up here by yourselves." They had barely put out the kitchen fire the last time the boys had tried to sneak back upstairs to hang out together. They had wanted pizza bites and Chris didn't understand the stove yet. Or the microwave.

"Yup." Tony got onto the elevator. Pepper was still getting dressed, she'd make sure they made it back down there. Which was probably a huge mistake but he'd regret it later when the daycare called. Philip walked into Chris's room, handing him his backpack. Chris had a nice blue t-shirt so they'd match. They put on the stick-on tattoos he had gotten from the gumball machine. They were cool and all kids loved tattoos. His daddy had some and they were great.

"Tv say no wear undies," Chris said. "Not under kilt."

Philip considered it and shrugged. "Okay." He took his off and they went into the backpack. It might be nasty but Mommy had taught him how to clean his butt so he wouldn't leave marks on anything. Chris could tie his own shoes so that was great. They ran out together before Pepper finished doing her makeup, going to the cafeteria to sneak sweets. The ladies in there smiled at them.

"You're both adorable, boys. Those are very pretty tattoo stickers." The boys grinned and Chris swiped his card in the machine. They let them run off with their pastries and juices.

Miss Nancy watched them come in. "Awww, you got breakfast and kilts." She really was going to have to talk to Clint. The boys looked like little mini goth kids only they weren't wearing guyliner and didn't have spiky hair. They settled in to go over things with Liz, who just smiled and patted them both on the head. Philip gave her one of the tattoo stickers to put on. She squealed and had their help putting it on. Miss Nancy was taking notes. She really had to talk to the parents sometime. She even took pictures. Caro and Etta ran in with Etta's little sister Marjorie following in her remote control stroller. She was barely walking and it was cute. Caro and Etta spotted the boys and giggled, going to play with Marjorie for now. It was Marjorie who would point out a flaw that Miss Nancy had missed.

"Butt!" Marjorie announced and pointed.

Miss Nancy looked. "Chris!" He hopped up and his kilt quit wiggling up his thighs as he shifted to color something else. "What ..... Why aren't you wearing underwear, Chris?" she asked, taking him aside. Then she came back to get Philip too. Since Philip had brought Chris things, it was probably partially his idea.

"Tv say you don't under kilt." He grinned. "Much nicer."

"In daycare you have to wear underwear at all times, boys."

Philip shook his head. "No, not supposed to under kilt." Chris pulled up an internet search. She closed it down on them and settled in to reasonably talk to them about it. They were boys and stubborn boys at that so they refused to understand the rules. Finally, she had to call a higher power. "Mr. Stark, may I see you in the daycare?" she requested politely.

"I'm a bit busy with a meeting, Miss Nancy. Is someone injured?"

"Stubborn but having a bit of a problem of the clothing sort."

"Send them up to me. Philip too if he's involved. With a note so we can talk about it."

"Gladly, Mr. Stark. Thank you." She hung up and wrote the note, handing it to Philip. "He's in a meeting." They grinned and would deviate to the cafeteria again for some oranges but they were boys and like that. Miss Nancy looked at her helper and went to the bathroom, shutting herself inside to laugh herself silly and a bit sick. The boys were very smart. And smartasses.

Tony hung up. "Sorry, problem in the daycare." His son and Philip came in with their oranges. "That's a nice fruit choice, boys. I see Philip's kilt addiction has spread."

"They're boy skirts so for pretty boys," Chris said with a grin, showing off his tattoos too.

"Very nice tattoo stickers. Your mom will adore those." Which she wouldn't but oh well. They washed off eventually. He took the note and sighed, putting the boys in his lap. "Let's handle the meeting and then we'll talk, guys." They nodded, staring at the other person.

"That's your son and who?"

"Dawn's son. She sent him to daycare this morning because he and Chris are best friends."

"Mira up all night with baby hairballs," Philip said.

"Ah, I know that sound." He patted him on the back. "Eat your oranges." They settled in to peel them, the lunch ladies had gotten them mostly done for them. Tony went over the details of the plans.

Chris looked up at him then at the other guy. "That's really 'spensive. Does it really cost that much to make it or is that markup?" He ate a bite of orange. "Some day I'll need to order for my own stuff," he said at the stare the guy was giving him.

"It's a bit of a markup. Each business has to make a profit," he said with a smile.

Chris nodded. "Profit nice. Profit gives allowances and paychecks," he told Philip, who grinned.

"Allowances are nice. Mommy types up agreements and she said markups are part of it. She 'splained it to me."

"It is. We agreed how much markup we're allowed to charge your father's people for our materials," the guy said. "They're really smart, Stark."

Tony smiled. "They probably think you're overcharging me." Which he was but Tony would deal with it later. He handed Chris some napkins from the table for his fingers before he sucked them clean. Philip took the napkin too. He and Dawn had made sure the boys took hints. "So, delivery dates?"

Chris looked at him. "Soon? I might need some to make stuff for Sissy's wheelchair again. She made a stair crawler but it's not efficient. Has low power waste that needs solved."

"She did what?" the guy asked, looking at Tony.

"Emergency stair maneuverability feature. We ran into that problem during a tower assault," he said quietly.

"Oh. That's good I guess. I sell your father computer components, Chris."

"Which most motorized things take," he pointed out. "You need components to make power circuits to run stuff. Like our goat powered engine." He grinned. "Sissy and I shrank a battery for her chair but she still wants to roll it by hand most of the time. It powers that and the seat lift since tables are too high sometimes."

"I guess that's handy," he agreed. "Very practical."

Philip grinned. "We made her new cover the other day. Bulletproof and pretty."

"That's very helpful," Tony said. "Thank you." He grinned. "What else did you guys make her chair?"

"New wheels. Hers are pitiful," Chris said. "New grips too. They're too smooth, no traction. We inscribed lines on them for ease of gripping. She can go faster now. We put a laser on it." He grinned at Philip. "He helped hold it."

"I'm sure she appreciates the laser," Tony said, giving his son a strange look.

"She has to leave tower and there's bad guys out there, Daddy. She needs laser in case huge poopy head shows up again." He shrugged. "Or other bad guys that don't like us for being really smart."

"I guess she does," he agreed. "Put an emergency alarm on it?"

Philip bounced some. "Did! It's on her seat. She can push it with her butt."

"That's cool," Tony said with a smile. "How much electronics did it take?"

"Six boards and three connectors, Daddy, plus some pipes," Chris said.

"Sure, we can look at what you took them from."

"Old suit you let Callia tinker with," Philip said. "I helped by unscrewing."

"That's very helpful." He grinned at his supplier. "Chris is already working with me in the lab. He and Callia did the renovation plans that we updated since it was right before she got hurt. Liz decorated everything."

"That's great, Tony. It's clear he's a true Stark."

Tony grinned. "Very. Liz likes medical stuff and decorating."

"Aww. She's her mom's daughter."

"Liz is mean," Chris said. Philip nodded quickly. "She's going to be the mean, evil empress of Stark."

"I think that was Dawn," Tony said dryly. "One year for Halloween." His supplier cracked up. "I'm sure she'll have a lot to teach Liz over the years." He went over the rest of the agreement.

Chris looked then at the guy. "Your math is wrong."

"I used the calculator." Chris drew on the virtual screen he pulled up to show him. "I guess it was. We can correct that." Tony drew through it with a pen and changed that. "No Dawn?"

"Vacation day. Linda, her helper, too." He looked at him. "Linda will be back Friday or Dawn on Monday so I'll get that page to you on Tuesday with the changes? Sign this one as the preliminary?"

"That'll work for both sides," he agreed, making that note and signing it. Tony signed it.

"Pleasure doing business with you," Philip chirped with a grin. "You should go have a beer at the pub to celebrate."

Tony looked at him. "What did you sneak and watch on tv?"

"Movie?" He smiled shyly. "They do business stuff too."

"Hmm." He cuddled the boys, cracking the other guy up. He shook their hands and left. Tony put both boys onto the table to talk to them about how boys, even under kilts, wore underwear, no matter what the internet said. He had to show them how their kilts were cargo kilts, not true kilts, and only true kilts had that underwear exemption. They pouted but went up to put some on. Tony took the contract to Pepper, who gave him an odd look. He handed over the note. She moaned and shook her head. "I got through to them. They know you have to be wearing a real kilt, with tartan plaid and all the extra stuff like the bag that Philip called the external furry ball sack to not need underwear. So they're putting some on."

"Good!" He handed over the contract. "Why preliminary?"

"Math error. Chris caught it. I said we'd fax the corrected sheets over by Tuesday."

"That'll work," she agreed. She put it down to stare at him. "Why does our son have a kilt?"

"I have the feeling that Philip got it for him. He said it's a boy skirt, so therefore for pretty boys to wear. That way he's not wearing a dress and upsetting someone." She let out a tiny whimper. "He logiced it all the way through, Pepper. Philip really thought that out."

"I guess it's a good transition from Liz talking them into wearing her dresses." She rubbed her forehead, prompting him to give her a temple rub. "Do they own tartan kilts?"

"I don't think Chris does. Not sure about Philip. He did say he'd have to get the bag."

"Okay. Sure." She smiled back at him. "We need to clean out the closets anyway."

"That fits him better than his pants did."

"We can help him shop this weekend."

"Sure." He smiled. "They even match. They're both wearing blue shirts and khaki cargo kilts."

"They are scarily like twins some days," she said. Tony gave her a hug and went up to play with the boys. He caught them in the halls and explained that Pepper wasn't used to boys who wore kilts. He took them to his lab to show them where Pepper was from. They wore jeans down there most of the time so she had to get used to kilts. He showed them internet shopping too.

"How you try things on?" Philip asked.

"You shop the size you should be. Most people make things the same size. Except for shoes." They oohed and found a lot of stuff they liked. That helped and he even helped by teaching them how to sort out the clothes that were too little so Pepper didn't have to. Philip was great at sorting by size. They even did the dirty laundry so they only had to wash the stuff that was the right size. Which Tony taught them how to do. Even if Philip disagreed because Mommy Natasha did it differently.

***

That night, Chris couldn't sleep so he was looking at other boy skirts online. There were whole groups of people that wore boy skirts. They were pretty. Some were like his favorite shirts that were too small now. Sarongs looked neat and they tied instead of buttoning or zipping. There were ancient boy skirts too and he liked those. They were longer like his kilt. But they were plain and boring. He found out how they made those and he could make some of the sarongs into them he guessed. There were even boy skirts that turned into pants when you tucked them up. They were Uncle Xander's mommy's people's boy skirts. He ordered some of those too. Uncle Xander would probably show him how to tuck them in. He found out he could order candy too. When he had to finally pay for stuff, he frowned when they wouldn't let him swipe the card he used in the cafeteria. "JARVIS?"

"Yes?" the AI asked.

"How do I do this?"

"I can make you a virtual card number from your trust fund this one time."

"Cool!" He ordered more candy. He was a boy, he lived on candy and Red Bull. He found he could order that too and they would deliver it to him weekly. That was great! Him and Sissy wouldn't have to sneak off for it. He let JARVIS fill in those sections for him. Then he ran down to see how his new lab was looking. His elevator gave off smoke sometimes and it was so epic! He was going to be the best Stark geek ever!

***

Two days later, Callia answered the apartment phone. "Starks." She listened. "Did he get presents from the pervert in Norway too?" she quipped. "Is it huge? You know he's five, right? Sure, I'll see who's here and who can get it for him. Thank you." She hung up and looked around. No Auntie. She had to leave work early because Mira had cut herself trying to get the baby in the mirror and knocked it over on her head. She was in the infirmary getting stitches. Grandpa was working at SHIELD today.

Well, that left one trusty, strong adult who didn't do much real work. She called him. "Bucky, Chris got some mail and it's heavy stuff. No, I asked if it came from Norway too; Dad said he had ordered him clothes the other night when Mommy wanted to take him shopping. Thanks, Bucky. No, he's in the daycare." She hung up and got back to her homework and planning how to put on pants all day long. Maybe she'd go to skirts for a bit. At least those didn't bind or ride up on her.

Bucky came off the elevator with a hand truck full of boxes. "Ya think Stark ordered enough?" he complained.

She looked. "Maybe. This is Chris we're talking about and he's almost as fashionable as Auntie Dawn."

"Good point." He went back to get the rest.

She frowned at one box. "Dad ordered him Red Bull and I'm not allowed to have any?" she complained. She followed Bucky to break into that box. She took it back to do her homework. "Thanks, Uncle Bucky."

"I'll make Stark tip me for it," he said dryly. Stark was in a meeting with Pepper so he left a message with Linda that he had hauled it up there for him and the kid.

***

Tony looked at the pile of boxes. He had a sneaking suspicion his son had learned a bit too much. "JARVIS? Why is there a box of Red Bull?"

"Your son ordered it, sir. I did limit what he bought to under what you spent on his clothes in each category."

"Category?" Tony had to wince. He knew how much the clothes had cost.

"He found some other clothes he wanted to try and the Red Bull, which will be delivered monthly thanks to Amazon.com. I switched it from weekly on him as I didn't think he'd need that many a week." Tony looked at the nearest speaker. "I also kept it under that amount when he found the candy stores online, sir."

"He spent how much on candy?" Tony demanded. He opened the boxes, wincing at the sarongs in wild flower prints. And the dhotis. The bags were marked. And a real kilt and two bags so that solved that issue he had tried to stop. He found the three largest boxes from Amazon had candy. Another large box had bulk candy from a local bulk candy store. He stared at it. "Pepper?" he called. A few minutes later she came off the elevator. "Help me hide his stash?"

Callia rolled in and looked then at him. "At least I don't internet shop. If I want candy I go find it." She grabbed something and rolled off.

"Hey, mine!" Chris complained.

"I stole a Red Bull too, Chris. Daddy found the candy stash. Nice job!"

"Callia!" Tony complained. "Son, let's talk about how you have to have all shopping online approved by me or Mom, okay?" He walked him off to talk to him. Pepper was staring in horror at the candy. When Steve got there he helped her hide it up where the kids couldn't easily reach it. They hadn't counted on Callia building something to levitate stuff with Andrew. By the morning, all the candy was hidden in other places. Which Tony still found with the workmen who were going to be starting on that level's renovations soon.

Callia helped the most. She showed Chris how to budget and that his trust fund went down each time he ordered candy. That worked because he thought college sounded neat. He had been watching college movies to see what his sister was going to be doing in a few years.

***

Steve, Pepper, and Tony had a meeting about the kids in the office. The kids were all asleep. JARVIS was to tell them if any of the kids got up. They were going over the various issues they were having.

"Callia's clothing," Steve said. "It's gotten a bit tarty."

Pepper snorted, looking at him. "It is not."

"She has cleavage."

"All women have cleavage and unless she's wearing turtlenecks, which she can't in the summer, it's going to show. She's almost always kept it at a tasteful level and most of those were because she was outgrowing things." Steve slumped. "Women don't wear their shirts buttoned to the collar, Steve. In fact, a lot of button-up shirts for women don't have collar buttons." She looked at Tony. "That does bring up the subject of kilts."

"He's growing tired of it because he got told it meant he had to keep his legs closed. Our eldest is really good at handling him."

"I'm sorry, I don't like kilts," Steve said. "He's not Scottish. He's not whatever you call those funny looking kids at the mall."

"Actually, he and Philip are both a bit goth," Pepper admitted. "And I'd like them to be for more special occasions than daycare days." Tony nodded that was fine with him. "He needs to learn to set a schedule."

"He does. So does Liz," Tony agreed. "Which we're working on."

"Good. Because I can see them flunking out of college because it runs on a schedule and they don't. Callia too."

"By the time she gets there, she's only going to have project hours," Tony said.

"Damn." She crossed her legs. "She does sometimes keep one."

"She does most of the time," Tony corrected. "She makes it to physical therapy unless she's been up all night in the lab and she's cut back on those nights to make it to physical therapy."

Pepper nodded that was true. "Then the bikinis get to disappear, right?" Steve asked.

"No," Tony said. "She's allowed *tasteful* suits. Her black and blue zip top that goes near to her bellybutton is tasteful and we'll expect her to get more tasteful bottoms." Steve glared. "Welcome to the modern age. Have you been to the mall recently? Seen the booty skirts and shorts? Which her mother used to wear a lot." He pulled up pictures of Buffy. "That was her mom's frequent patrol outfit, Steve."

"She's an adult." He got comfortable. "I'm not pleased that she's showing more than telling."

Pepper shook her head. "She's not a nun, Steve. She's not dressing in business clothes. When she can comfortably put on jeans again she'll be back in them and leotards."

"Does she...."

"Yes," Tony said. "She does. She wore them for years in gymnastics. She wore them in swimming. They're her version of my concert t-shirts. They clean easily, let you sweat less in the lab, and they're comfortable." Steve slumped. Tony pulled up sites for teen girls to show him. "What would you rather have her wear?"

"Not those. Can't she dress like a young lady?"

"She's not wearing skirts in the lab," Pepper said. "It'd only cause her problems."

"They make pants."

"That you'll never get grease out of," Tony said. "That's why we wear jeans or chinos or khakis. Because you can get grease, dirt, and sweat out of them."

"She's got to do more than be in the lab."

"She's got her plans and it's a good one," Tony said. "I would've went that way if I thought my father would've let me. She'll still be in the lab all the time but she'll have her group of geeks that'll help her turn her ideas into things that do more for humanity." Steve nodded. "I was in the lab most of my twenties. I only came out to bar hop and get laid for the most part." Pepper laughed and nodded. "And the occasional meeting that I got forced to. I didn't own a suit for five years in there because I didn't need one."

"I don't see why they can't dress more nicely even in things that are lab appropriate. MB manages it."

"She's a chemist. They sit on a stool and mix things," Tony said. He banished the first screens and pulled up different lab views. What he and Callia did when they were tinkering together as well as him and Chris versus MB and others like Bruce. "We get into things. They mix. They study under a microscope."

Steve stared. "Can she learn to like that stuff?"

"No," Tony said. "She liked chemistry when they taught her stuff but it's not her love. You go into any science due to the love of it. It's in your blood and it's what fires you."

Steve grimaced. "I still think the kids all look sloppy half the time."

Pepper snorted. "They're not going to dress up to be at home, Steve."

"They have good clothes they consider play clothes."

"No they don't. That's all stuff that's too small. They're playing with it by giving it to the siblings to make them wear it. That's why Chris has dresses."

"They went to the Salvation Army," Tony said.

"Good!"

"So did Liz's old ones." He grinned.

"Thank you. That saved me a ton of work." She looked at Steve. "Girls aren't the same as they were in your day, Steve. They don't go out and play in dresses with dolls. They don't just jump rope and play hopscotch. Even my generation did a lot more than that. Girls have bikes. They have rollerblades. They have all sorts of things that require not only jeans to keep themselves from being hurt, but also they do more these days. And sometimes less when it's a video game day."

"I still think it's unnecessarily showy. It's flaunting her new shape."

"The one she used to hide by illusion?" Tony asked. Steve scowled. "She did."

"She did," Pepper said. "I worried about her self image because of that. We were all embarrassed but we learned they were just boobs and we got over it after about a year of our first periods and having to learn how to grope ourselves to put tampons in."

"Eww," Tony told her.

She smiled. "Few years from now, Tony."

"I know." He looked at Steve. "Callia's usually fairly conservatively dressed for her generation."

"There's girls that wear more."

"Yeah, they're future nuns, Mormons, and kids who do *nothing* all day. They're the ones who expect to be future wives and mothers. Even the 'wear a skirt daily' women who are trying to make women move backwards don't do all that much in them. I realize women in your generation wore things a lot longer and buttoned up. We gave that up outside of maxi dresses and those look like sun dresses and usually show off your upper figure." Steve grimaced. "She's not going to be wearing power suits. She'll probably have a few in her closet for necessary meetings but otherwise that's not who she is. You don't have a problem with Dawn's outfits, do you?"

"She's not my daughter and yes, she's a bit flirty."

"She's not that flirty."

"Linda wears pants."

"So does Dawn half the time," Pepper agreed. "They expect women in business to be steel backboned feminine women. It's a strange dichotomy that gets us underestimated. Dawn being that tiny bit flirty and feminine means that people underestimate her. They see a pretty assistant and don't see the language or self defense skills."

"What does her uniform look like?"

"Black shirt and pants or skirt and a red blazer," Tony said.

Steve grimaced. "Button up?"

"Up to her," Pepper said. "They're not that restrictive." He nodded. "She's picked out some black t-shirts without pockets and a few prettier shirts that have v-necks so it doesn't choke her when it rides up. She's debating pants over skirts due to the chair. Pants give her fits."

"She can't cross her legs so it'd be skorts," Tony said.

"That's an option I gave her but she was horrified and said they were for dorks."

"They can be," Tony agreed. "Depends on the style." He considered it. "Can we tailor them so the zippers are on the side to make it easier on her?"

"The tailor is making two, one on each side. That'll open up the hip area so she doesn't have as many problems. We got them a size too big in the waist too so she could sit more comfortably." He nodded. "I'd say leggings but she's still got that problem with pulling them up."

"They're tights," Steve said. "Without feet."

"Some," Pepper agreed. "Some are meant to be worn under a long shirt. They're cute and fashionable."

"They're tights," he said.

Tony shook his head. "Nothing is going to be as loose as they used to be, Steve. We found nylon elastic and it became part of everything. For that matter, Callia's got the body to carry it off. She used to wear leggings all the time." Pepper nodded she remembered. "By the way, she caught onto your 'watch old movies with me to see how women were classy' thing you had going. She said that's great and they'd probably love panty hose instead of stockings. Though, Pepper, she did talk to Dawn about pantyhose versus stockings to see why she wore them." Pepper nodded she knew that. "And the verdict was?"

"When she's older and it matters, she can switch if pantyhose give her problems like Dawn had. Dawn tried them for about a month and then ended up at the doctor's twice in three weeks. He told her to give them up and it cured the issues."

"Huh?" Steve asked.

"Pantyhose can cause yeast infections," Pepper said. "It traps moisture. It can cause itching, rashes, all sorts of nastiness. That's why Dawn wears stockings instead."

"I remember seeing her in them a few times," he complained. "That pink dress and the black one."

"That's ancient history," Pepper said. "The black dress was because everything else in her closet got slimed by a neighbor's science experiment. She had that and club clothes." Steve shuddered.

"I told her to wear the pink dress to make it look like she wasn't concerned. Sometimes the show is enough to change your mood," Tony said.

"Joyce still thinks it was a darling outfit, and I agree. Dawn looked like a cute young woman in it," Pepper said with a grin. Tony smiled back.

"Still too flirty."

"Welcome to the new millennium," Tony said dryly. "Women are expected to be slightly sexy, competent in their fields, and have it all."

"Which is unfair since guys only have to be presentable," Pepper quipped.

"True," Tony agreed with a smile. "Though you, Dawn, and Liz always make sure I look sexy."

"That's because it fits you," Pepper said.

Steve stared at them. "Guys." They stared at him. "She's still too young to be that flirty. She's eleven."

"She's not that flirty," Tony said. He pulled back up pictures. "The recent leotards are a bit loose but she's also mid-growth spurt."

"It's the last one she'll have for about a year," Pepper said. She looked at Steve. "I like how she looks. It's comfortable, tasteful, not trashy or overly showy."

"She shouldn't have clothes like that until she's eighteen," he said.

"Today, girls are women at sixteen and boys are guys at eighteen," Tony said. "Is she coming out, Pepper?"

"We haven't talked about it." She made a note. "I'll ask her."

"Why would she?" Steve asked.

"Because as a Stark, we're members of higher society," Tony said. "I'm a billionaire, Steve. It's part of the job sometimes." Steve stared at him. "It's the same reason we go to the symphony now and then and plays. Not as often as some of the society cows but often enough. I was announced and if I had a sister she would've had a coming out party."

Pepper nodded. "It's not the first time it's been asked," she said. "I did get asked about Liz."

"Up to you. She's my daughter, even if she's not biologically, Pep."

"I know, Tony. I'm considering it. It could help her future career unless she went into something really low class like being a waitress."

"She likes medicine, law, and business so far, plus art," Tony said. "Have her come out." She nodded, making note of that. "So, that means we'll have to have sixteenth birthday parties." Pepper nodded. "We can plan that."

"She doesn't need to one of those spoiled heiresses," Steve said firmly.

"She's not going to suddenly change just because she got introduced," Tony said. "That's how you raise your kids, not how they're born. It is expected she'd get a huge present at that time. Usually something like a car. Which I've always said we'd hand-build. So I'll have to start that at least a year before."

"Which she's going to help you with," Pepper said.

"She's going to hand-forge things?" Steve asked.

"Yeah. She's been wanting to learn," Tony said with a smile. "This is how she's going to learn. I've told her that all along."

"Do you think you pushed her into science?" he asked him.

"No. I think if she hadn't liked science she would've told us and we would've found what she did like. There for a while I thought for sure she'd end up a Veterinarian. Which was perfectly fine with us. All the kids will find their fields of interest and future work. None of my kids will ever be one of the spoiled slut society. They'll all have jobs. If Maeve or Liz want to retire after they start having kids that'd be up to them at that point. I wouldn't like it, it'd be wasting their potentials, but that's up to them."

"So if Liz wants a job like Dawn's?" he asked.

"She's getting a job like Dawn's if she wants to run the company or any business," Pepper said. "She's going to learn how to run it from the lower levels up. That's the best way to do it and it means you don't forget the normal people when you're running it. No one's going to hand her a high powered position on her name. She'll have to prove herself and women in business still have a glass and wire ceiling above us. Like any other job, she'll start out lower and work her way up. If she wants to go into business she'll have summer jobs with Dawn or someone here."

"Or law," Tony said. "I asked and Gloria said she's doing it with her own son starting next year. I agreed that a paid internship during the summers would teach him not only about how you really worked at a job but also make sure that's what he wanted to do before he spent all that money on college."

"Then what?" Steve asked. "They go to college?"

"Yup," Tony agreed. "Even if they're not sure what they want to do they're going to college. Most jobs these days take college, even if you're going into art. We'd make sure she had a minor or second major that was more practical so she could live on that while she starts to work on her own art collections. The kids are only getting small living stipends when they hit eighteen until they're twenty-five then they have yearly restrictions on how much of their trust they can pull out unless it's an emergency and either us or whoever is managing her trust agrees. I fully expect them to save up for their first homes. I took my part of the sale of my first design to buy my house in Malibu. I only lived on my trust for about four years and that was because I was in college. After that, I ran the company, poorly but I did run it, and designed things. I built the company beyond what Dad had done."

Pepper nodded. "He did. Used to drive him nuts." Tony smiled and nodded at her.

"Can Callia dress more like you, Pepper?"

"No. Because what I wear is practical for meetings and being in the office. She's not going to be in the office, Steve. She's going to wear what's practical for her career and in her life. Beyond that, I have shirts that are more showy than hers and you like me in them."

"You're not my daughter."

"No, I'm not. Or eleven. She's allowed to pick her own clothes within reason. It's not like she picks slutty looking things. We haven't had a single pair of short shorts, even on the beach where she could get away with it as a coverup. Speaking of, we have got to get Liz jeans, Tony."

"I bought her six pairs," he said.

"Thank you!"

"I like how Liz dresses," Steve complained.

"She can't play in it," Tony said. "You can't play in a skirt, Steve. Beyond the whole flashing everyone thing that happens sometimes, you can't get on the floor and play with blocks or sit at the coffee table and do your homework that way."

"We have a table."

"And it's for dinner time," Pepper said. "We're going to overrule you on this, Steve. The kids are going to be wearing things that are easy for them to play and explore in. If we're in North Dakota at the house there, I fully expect the kids to hike into the woods and explore. Or the grounds in Malibu."

Tony nodded. "Me too. I want them to run, jump, and play, not have to sit perfectly so they don't flash panty. I want my kids to be down on the ground wrestling with their friends and all that. That's what kids do."

"Girls don't...."

"They do now," Tony said, staring him down. "That's changed. I know it's hard for you but yeah, girls now play football and basketball. They wrestle." Steve grimaced but slumped. "They can act like polite little society girls but they're not. They're never going to be the polite little society girl sort. They're girly enough and it's fine with us. Eventually, Callia's going to get back into sports. Chris might find he likes sports beyond playing pool."

"He did?" Pepper demanded.

"Yeah. Clint taught him." He grinned. "I asked him to so he had some guy sports time. Though he did like horse jumping when Liz showed him. So did she."

"Callia's school has that as a lesson set. We can enroll them in it when they're old enough. Liz could go next year." She made that note too. "She's a bit ahead but not terribly like Callia was."

Tony nodded. "She's a smart little mini Pepper." She grinned at that. "They also have art history classes and art classes."

"How are they getting to a school an hour from here?" Steve asked.

"Happy," Tony said. "I asked and he said he'd be more than glad to get the kids there and back. Callia's already talked to the band teacher, and admitted she slacked on her music since the accident, but he's going to let her have practice space after school." Pepper grinned. "It's good for her to have a lot of interests and hobbies."

"It is," she agreed.

"She's playing the bass," Steve said.

"Yeah, some women do," Tony agreed. "She can't practice that was as well. It's still awkward for her so she's dropping that one for now. She'll pick it back up later when it's easier for her to properly sit around it."

"That's fine," Pepper agreed. "I caught her playing her autoharp the other day and she sounded good. The cats were staring at her like she was a goddess again."

"She is their goddess most of the time."

"She could wear those broomstick skirts," Steve said.

"For school maybe," Pepper agreed. "She got a few knee length ones but they were A-lines. I'll suggest that for her school look."

Tony nodded. "They're loose cotton and comfortable from what Dawn's said."

"They are. Very light so not in the winter." She made that note too. Tony stared at her. "I've been forgetful."

"They said it happens." She smiled weakly. "We're behind you on that. Mostly so you can't hit us with anything, Pepper." She snorted but shook her head with a slight smile. He looked at Steve. "Any other topics?"

"The music thing," he said. "It's loud. It's annoying."

"It's how we think," Tony said. "My lab almost always has music on."

"Which is loud and slightly jarring," Steve said.

"Their labs are going to be soundproofed. The kids have been exposed to all sorts of music and they like a variety, including big band stuff you showed them. When they're working they do what I do and play hard rock or heavy metal. Though I'm a bit worried about all the Breaking Benjamin going on in Callia's lab. Pepper, can you talk to her about being a bit angry and depressed? I figure it's normal but I don't want her to get *depressed*."

"I have. She's still on the okay levels there. It's driving her to do better instead of making her give up."

"Thanks."

"Welcome. I worried too. Then again, she was playing a song she got from her aunt last night. She was sure she'd never be that sort of bad girlfriend but sometimes it fit her aunt very well when she teased Clint."

"Why does she know about that?"

"Because she's studied them," Tony said. "She studies people. She knows people a lot better than I do. She knows how to talk to them and how to inspire them. That plus tabloid stories about them going out to club sometimes."

"Is Dawn maybe a bad influence?"

"No," Pepper said firmly. "She's not." Steve grimaced but let it go for now. She and Tony shared a look. They'd let Dawn handle that one. Her phone beeped. "We're in here, Chris."

He leaned around the doorway. "I know." He grinned. He looked at Steve. "I didn't know you were like those preachers on tv who have not a clue and hate us." He looked at his father. "Maeve has Liz's snoring problem. I was up and heard her do that funny hiccup Liz still does sometimes and put her alarm on her. It started to go off once I hitched it down, which woke her and made her wail a lot. Callia came in to help. Where's the travel one? Callia can't find it."

"It's in my closet," Pepper said, getting up. "Thank you." She cuddled him. "You should've called."

"JARVIS said you guys were talking about adult stuff."

She carried him up there to get the spare alarm. Liz still slept with an apnea alarm just in case. Maeve was fussy but the attached oxygen meter was low. "Tony, she's got a low pulse ox."

"JARVIS, get one of the docs up here please," he said, checking the machine. "The air tank is low. It's not concentrating right. It must need serviced." One of the docs hurried off the elevator. "She's got Liz's apnea."

"I heard she had some." He came over to check her, looking at the low pulse oxygen rate. He adjusted the monitor and tickled her. It went up some. "Want me to set up a tent?"

"For tonight until I can get the machine serviced," Tony said. "Liz, want to go sleep in an oxygen tent?"

"Nope," she said. She took the travel alarm. She knew how to set it up for herself. They checked to make sure but took Maeve down there. "She'll get used to the mask," she told Chris when he climbed in with her. He cuddled her. "It's okay. They caught me not breathing at all." He gave her a squeeze and cuddled. She let him. It was nice to be cuddled.

"Chris, you have a bed," Steve said quietly from the doorway. "You're too old to sleep with your sister."

"She needs cuddles," Chris said, glaring at him. "Go away."

"I'm your father. Go back to your bed."

Tony came up and shook his head, walking Steve off with him. "He can cuddle her. Not like he's going to grope. Even if she had something to grope. He's being a protective brother." He handed him to Bucky when they ran into him. "Talk to him about that stuff, Steve. Maybe he can show you how things are now."

Bucky stared at him. "Which topic? I know you've been scowling about the clothing."

"That too. I just tried to get Chris back to his own bed instead of Liz's."

"Liz has that breathing problem and Chris is really sensitive to that stuff. Besides, I caught him in my Playboys the other day to see what big girls grew into. He was not amused by all the hair." Steve glared at him. He walked him off to talk to him about that stuff. Bucky had sneaked dirty pictures too and it hadn't hurt him. He'd get Steve to relax. Hopefully.

***

Dawn came back her first day back and looked things over, settling in to fix that page on the agreement. Linda hadn't gotten to it Friday. She smiled at Pepper and Steve as they came off the elevator. "I'll have this fixed in a few minutes. I also moved all the bigger documents to the shared folder Linda and I both have access to."

"Thank you. She said she couldn't find that one," Pepper said.

"Not a problem. I didn't even think about it. I sent her an email about where it was found on the server." She got back to work. "What happened?" I sense the air of gloom."

"Maeve started to do the hiccup/not breathing thing," Pepper sighed. Dawn stopped typing to stare at her. "She's fine. Liz's system wasn't concentrating properly so it's being fixed by Tony today."

"Okay. I'll add that to my mandatory pack list." Pepper smiled and went in to her desk. "Just got here so I didn't check it yet, Pepper."

"I know I'm early, Dawn."

Steve watched her type. Dawn was in a modernly modest dress that girls in his day would've thought was too showy. "Dawn?" She saved the document and looked at him, turning her chair to cross her legs. "I'm a bit worried that some of your...flirty ways are influencing Callia a bit too young."

She stared at him. "Women aren't like they were in your day, Steve. We don't believe that women's bodies are shameful things that should only be seen in classical art and nickel movies on Saturdays. These days, women learn to appreciate our bodies and accept it for the flaws it has. Some don't learn acceptance very well but they do eventually when all the fighting against what you have naturally wears you out. I don't think she's been overly flirty or showy. The new leotards are a bit loose but that's because she's went up a size in the last two months and is probably going to go up about another two in the next year. Even then I don't think it falls too low and it's mostly baggy around her waist. So why do you think that?"

"She had cleavage."

"All women have cleavage. The bras they design make sure of it. There's not a whole lot of getting around that if you wear a bra." He gaped. "That's the whole purpose of a bra. It's just that girls are getting breasts earlier now than they were before. We've went from around thirteen for them starting to come up to some girls getting them at eight and nine now. All that within the last decade. I know Callia's not interested in anyone seeing hers. She's still embarrassed by her body. Especially with her injury. It's twisted how she sees herself somewhat. Any major injury does. I had some of that when I had the huge divot in my neck from that acid attack." She tipped her head slightly. "I'm sorry she's going through what girls used to do at sixteen but we grow up sooner. That's just a biological fact."

"I think you're teaching her the wrong things about her body. She has been awfully showy."

She snorted and shook her head. "No, she hasn't. She's not shown one hint of anything inappropriate. Pepper and I both monitor those things."

"She's got a strapless gown for that award she didn't get to get."

"Yes. It fit her the best," Dawn said. "And I didn't help her pick that out. Pepper did. It fit her frame and the restraints of the wheelchair the best. It's also not all that showy. It covers up her entire breast area. You can't even see cleavage with the way the tailor fit it to her." Steve gaped. "I saw it during the final fitting. It sits above the cleavage line. I'm told she was going to wear a shawl over it to cover her shoulders. Which is totally modest even by older standards."

"It's slutty!"

"It's not," she said calmly.

"Steve," Pepper warned.

"She's showing her to be a flirty little slut!" Steve complained, pointing at Dawn. Who stood up and punched him into a wall.

She stared at him. "Tell me that to my face, Captain." He blinked, mouth open. "C'mon. Women aren't helpless little bimbos anymore. We're trained from very early on to be fully aware of who we are, what we are, and what we can do." She snapped her fingers and brought something to her hand. "You can find out if you want."

"Dawn," Tony said, taking the choker from her hand. "That's mean." He walked Steve off. "Finish that contract?"

"Nearly done, I'm fixing the typos I apparently left in last time." She settled in again to type that up and talk to Clint and Natasha, who told Bucky.

Bucky showed up where Tony had Steve and hit him again. "For insulting Dawn from Natasha." He stared at him. "She's not a whore. Your daughter's not turning into one either. You accused her maternal aunt of warping the girl into a slut. You do realize that Dawn can kick you around and then kill you?" Steve opened his mouth. Bucky held up a hand. "Girls today get what they used to get at sixteen at twelve. Or sooner. Girls start their periods now at twelve and thirteen, Steve. There've been kids who've had babies at ten." He shuddered. "So you need to get over this. Now. Before Callia herself kicks you."

"I'd never kick him. I might hurt myself," Callia said from behind them. "Then again it might be worth the broken foot since someone thinks I look like a slutty heiress sort." She glared at him. "Are you actually Steve Rogers?" He stomped off. She waved. "Come back when you're normal, Stepmom. Because I don't need this shit on top of all the other shit in my life. I can dress like the other girls my age if you want."

"Like hell," Tony complained, staring at her. "You okay?"

"Yup."

"How much did you hear?"

"I eavesdropped through the security cameras. No matter how many times JARVIS shut them off." She stared at him.

"We don't have a problem. You always show taste and decorum."

"Thank you!" She rolled herself off. "I'm going to hug my aunt. She's pouting and upset because of him. She's not in trouble, right? Because if she is we three kids will overrule you."

"Not even if he presses charges," Tony said dryly. "I'll forgive that arrest." He followed her, giving Dawn his own hug. "I find you appropriately flirty and tasteful. Thank you for making sure she was too." He went into the office. "Steve stomped off."

"We'll handle it," she sighed.

Callia rolled backwards to look at them. "We're all dressing like the normal mall kids today." She rolled back to hug her aunt some more. "He's confused because even in his day girls wore pants if they weren't outside." She nodded. "Finish up. We're going to dress like normal kids."

Dawn looked at her. "Hot Topic?"

"Cheaper. Old Navy. That way I don't spend tons on an outfit like them." She smiled and rolled off. "Dad, taking Happy and my shopping card."

"If you must."

"Yup, I must." She gathered the other two and took them down to the car. Happy was waiting. "We need to hit Old Navy, Happy. Stepmom thinks I look slutty."

Happy Hogan winced. "No you don't."

"Apparently I'm not uptight enough." She let the kids get into the car first then transferred in and let him fold up the wheelchair to put in there. She got them buckled into their booster seats and Happy drove them off. She got out first since it was easier. Then Liz got Chris out. She looked at them. "Two outfits at the most," she warned. They nodded. She rolled in there, smiling at the saleswoman. "We need to look like normal kids at the mall. My stepmom thinks I look too slutty in this. We're showing him what eleven, six, and five year olds wear."

"I can do that. What's your budget?"

"Under two outfits. Mine I have to be able to get into."

"I understand. My daughter's been on the arm crutches now for over a year thanks to a car crash. She has to watch the length of her pants and shirts." Callia nodded. She found them a pretty fashionable look. Then let them pick the colors. The cute little boy wanted something more delicate but Liz handed him one and it was good enough for him. They got changed and she nodded, picking out another one. This one was a bit more...trendy, and slightly more tasteless. She knew that struggle very well. Her own daughter had done something similar. They checked out and got back into the limo. She hadn't noticed that but she knew that driver. She checked the slip and smiled. That explained a lot about why they wanted 'normal kid' looks.

***

Steve came off the elevator in time for dinner, staring at his kids. "What are you wearing?" he demanded.

"Trendy stuff. This is what the kids at the mall wear in our ages." Liz smiled at him. "I kinda like the skirt but it's short."

"It is," Callia agreed. "Knees together, Liz. I don't like polka dots."

Liz huffed but did that. "Why did you get pants?"

Callia looked at her. "Because right now my knees won't meet."

"Oh yeah. I forgot." Callia hugged her for that.

Chris hopped up. "See, Liz picked it out, Stepmom. It's what kids wear."

Tony and Pepper came off the elevator. Pepper stared. "Liz, that's way too short, dear."

"It's how they wear them these days," Callia said dryly. "They were *all* that short. In my size range they came mid thigh. Hers at least nears her knees."

"No! Skirts are not to be above your knee!" Steve said firmly.

Callia stared at him. "That's how we normally do it and you think we look like sluts." He flinched back. "You want it, you got it, Toyota," she quipped. She adjusted the shirt. "This boob thing sucks."

"It does," Pepper agreed, helping her adjust the shirt. "That's your right size too."

"Yup. Tight is in this year." She shrugged. "According to Old Navy."

Pepper nodded. "No, go change." She grinned and they went to change. She looked at Tony.

"At least Old Navy's cheap."

"It was sixty for all six outfits," Liz called.

"Thank you," Pepper called back. "Six?"

They came out in the other ones. "More trendy and hip for mall times with our group dates," Callia said with a smile.

"Dating?" Steve squeaked.

"Yes, most girls my age go out in packs that meet up with packs of boys at the mall. Then we hang out and do boring things while flirting. That progresses to one-on-one dates about fifteen or sixteen."

"Heck no!" he said firmly, pointing. "Go change."

"You thought *what* was bad?" she countered, staring at him. He glared. "Try it," she offered. He backed up, shaking his head quickly.

"He wouldn't," Tony soothed, coming over to hug her. "He'd never hurt you. You know that."

"Not by the look on his face. Maybe he's possessed by the ghost of bigoted grandfathers past. We should see." She went to change into pajamas. So did the other two.

"I'd never hit her," Steve said.

"She knows," Pepper promised. "We all know that. It's just that you were getting really mad and she had to break that before you started to shout." Steve calmed himself down and nodded. He went to the bathroom to calm himself down away from everyone. She looked at Callia. "Huge overreaction."

"Sorry. I'll apologize. I misread his body language," she said quietly. Tony cuddled her on the couch. She sank into his arms. "Do I have to be uncomfy, Daddy?" she asked quietly.

"No, you don't. Your clothing rules have not changed. None of yours have." Liz and Chris piled into his sides. "Now, when you're old enough to date, they change a lot." She snorted but it was a happier sound. He cuddled all the kids to him. Maeve fussed from her playpen so Pepper sat down on Liz's other side with her so they could cuddle too. Steve could join then when he realized he was being an idiot. Bucky came off the elevator. Tony pointed. He went in to talk to Steve. And possibly kick him around since Bucky had a date tonight.

***

Dawn looked up from her typing the next day when someone walked up to her desk. "Yes, how can I help you?"

"Mrs. Barton?"

"Romanoff-Barton."

"All right. I'm Agent Decker with the FBI, ma'am. May we speak?" She pointed at the chair across from her desk. "In private?"

"My boss is in a meeting and I shouldn't leave my desk at the moment. Beyond that, we're pretty well alone at the moment outside of my niece." She pointed at Liz, who was reading fashion magazines in the corner. She was 'hiding' from her homework. "What's happened now?"

"Mrs. Romanoff-Barton, we need to borrow your husband for an undercover mission. It'll be about six months."

"You do realize that my husband is fairly popular and plenty of people know who he is? That vastly limits his undercover opportunities."

"We can install someone in his place in your household so it doesn't look odd."

"So you think you can replace my husband in my household and you what, expect me to treat him the same?"

"Yes, we would."

"You're smoking what sort of crack?" she demanded calmly.

"It's highly important."

"Important enough to get my husband killed?"

"I doubt he would be. The person he's going in as has been imitating him."

"Probably without success. And who did you think this other person would be?"

"I'm told he has a brother Barney?" he suggested with a pleasant smile.

Dawn stood up, noticing Liz had run off. "Excuse me? You want to put my brother-in-law, who I nearly killed for kidnaping my children, in my home to pretend to be his brother?" she demanded coldly. "The one that's killed over a hundred people?"

"I'm sure your husband has quite the kill count at his job."

"No, Barney is a wanted felon who was in SHIELD custody. He's not an agent," she sneered. "And I doubt this little plot of yours will ever work. Even if I was inclined it would not work for multiple reasons," she said, enunciating very clearly. She realized she was starting to glow and didn't really care. "I doubt any of this would work since every single person in the US knows what my husband looks like. He's been on the cover of Newsweek six times in the last five years. He's the second most recognizable Avenger behind Stark." The man wasn't looking scared.

"Dawn, can you calm down before you destroy the city?" Tony said, coming up the hall. He was trying to look calm. He was shaky. He had not seen Dawn this mad in years. He never wanted to see it again after last time. Certainly not in his office building full of people and technology.

"No, I cannot, Tony. This nice agent, Decker wasn't it?" She looked at her boss with a frigid smile. "He wants to send Clint on an undercover mission for six months and put *Barney* in his place."

"Oh hell no," Tony said.

"Mr. Stark, this isn't really your call," Agent Decker said. "Agent Romanoff....."

"I'm not Agent Romanoff. I'm the other wife," she said dryly. "I'm the dangerous wife actually."

"Aw, come on, I'd never take what's Clint's unless you offered," Barney said as he came off the elevator. Dawn lashed out without looking and slammed him through a wall. "Ow. I wasn't going to hurt you."

Dawn looked at him. "Shut. Up. Barney." His mouth disappeared. She looked at the agent again. Now he was starting to look worried. Agents started to come off the elevator. Including Natasha and then Clint. "Natasha, he thought I was you. I think he needs his eyes checked as I'm not a curvy redhead."

"You are not but you cannot be this upset, Dawn. We do not want you to destroy the city."

She stared at her wife. "Did he tell you of his crackhead plan?"

"I did protest and he said I did not understand national security." Dawn let out a bitter sounding snort. "Please calm down?"

"Fuck no!"

Clint got between them. "Dawn?" She stared at him. "I'm not going. Not at all. Even if they could send in someone like Gamble I wouldn't leave you and the kids alone like that." She took a deeper breath because he prompted her to. "Please calm down? The alarm's going off. Your mother's scared and Bruce is taking her to the bunker right now. Okay? We need you to calm down before you destroy the state." He moved closer. "See, right here. Barney's not getting near you or the kids." He picked her hand up to put on his arm. "See, right here."

"Make him go," she said quietly. "It will save humanity."

"I can do that," Tony promised. "Guys, take her to the admin breakroom." Clint nodded, leading Dawn that way. Natasha saved what she was working on and put her computer to sleep then followed. "How fucking stupid are you!" he shouted. "Did you mean to make her threaten humanity! The agent flinched back. "Guys, let's go. I don't want this in the building." The SHIELD agents helped him get him outside. He pointed at a reporter looking worried. He knew at least one would be out there with the way agents had rushed to the towers. "Tell him something for Dawn."

"Sure, Mr. Stark. What's going on?"

"He wanted to send Clint undercover as someone else and put Barney in his place for six months."

She let out a whimper. "Oh, god, the kids will have to see her kill him. Possibly a few times with the way someone keeps making him a new body." She looked around at the other reporters starting to gather then at him. "Um, doesn't he know that we follow you Avengers everywhere?"

"Apparently not. Or heard of the conventions or anything else," Tony said. "Dawn said to please inform him of things."

She looked at the agent, clearing her throat. "There's multi-thousand people conventions to the Avengers team and Clint Barton is the second most recognized Avenger, after Mr. Stark here, and unless the Hulk is huge and green. Then we all kinda recognize him and run for our lives. Um... Wow, you took a victim from Dawn. You're really brave, Mr. Stark."

"Sometimes but she didn't have any of the poisons with her," he quipped. "He thought she was Natasha."

"Oh, he's that sort of stupid," she said, nodding.

"SHIELD teaches people to use poisons?" another reporter asked.

"There's classes in it," Tony said. "Dawn took some of them over Agent Coulson's shoulder. She's actually really good at it." The reporter was still giving him a funny look. "Did you think any assassinations had to be done by sniper?"

"Well, I never thought about it."

Tony nodded. "They're all very talented." The agent struggled and Tony prayed at Coulson because the alarm was still going off. Tony Stark wasn't normally a praying man but he could hear Dawn stomping his way and he really wanted saved.

"Oh, please, Alexander," one of the reporters prayed. "Save us from Dawn!" Dawn stormed out full of green glow, her hair moving in a breeze that no one else felt, her clothes melting into her light battle uniform, with the leather vest.

Agent Phil Coulson appeared and stopped her, staring at her. "It's my job," he said quietly. "Let me do it."

"Get out of my way."

"No, Dawn. Calm down. Please?"

"He threatened Natasha with going to jail if we didn't cooperate. Fuck. Him."

"Let me handle it," he ordered, staring her down. Xander appeared beside him, axe in his hand. "Xander, please," he said calmly.

He looked at his spouse. "I'm backing up Dawn." The reporters started to pray. He looked at him then at Dawn. "Maybe he could send Gamble in Clint's place there and you keep Clint?"

"I don't care and I doubt they need any version of Clint."

"Probably not," Coulson agreed. He called in for particulars. "I'm sure she won't be destroying humanity, Agent Hill, turn off the alarm. Before the city panics. Thank you." He listened. "I think that's a bad idea." He turned off his comm, looking at the agent. "I'm Senior Agent Phil Coulson. What makes you think SHIELD would lend the FBI an agent for such a suicide mission?"

"If he's any good it wouldn't be."

"We have over a thousand pictures of Agent Barton this year," one of the reporters said. The guy gaped at her in horror. "He's an *Avenger*. You save the world you get noted for it. Dawn, can I please live?"

"I'm not going to destroy the city. Linda wanted to make sure too so I wouldn't let her mother die. I'd never do that to my kids anyway. Just this one spot. I can even fill in the hole I create."

"No, Dawn," Phil said. "We may not harm the city at all. Even to plant an idiot in the ground as traffic hazard." He stayed between them. "Please calm down? Where's Clint and Natasha, Stark?"

"They were with her. Though, Barney's got a new body. She just removed his mouth."

"Great. He doesn't need to eat and I doubt he'll want it in prison anyway," Xander said with a grin. "Makes the other cons work harder." Dawn looked at him. "They will."

"I know." She glared at the man between her and her target. "I can kill him around you."

"We may not kill an FBI agent. Even if he did just suggest you be raped by your brother-in-law for a few months before he kills you and the children."

"I want her arrested," Agent Decker demanded.

Phil looked at him. "Denied." The agent gasped. "Shut up. Now please." He looked at Dawn again. "I can see the point in it but you're going too hard. You're too hot. You'd end up doing collateral damage. You don't want to pay for the rebuild, right?"

"No," she ground out. "Not really." Clint came jogging out and she got free of him grabbing her wrist. "Let go."

"Nope, sorry." He picked her up and turned her around. "You can be dangerous and deadly later, Dawn. We love you like that. And the way the suit fits you now because the baby did your body good again." She blushed, giving him a slightly peeved look but a slight grin too. "You got booty again." He moved up behind her, walking her off by hugging her from behind and walking them both off. "C'mon, we'll go calm down. That way you don't have to rebuild Stark's shiny towers or anything."

"Just one little poison?"

"No. If he's going to be poisoned I'm going to do it for trying to get me killed." She stared at him, stopping them. He grinned. "It's okay. I'm not going. He can bite me. I'll quit SHIELD first. Okay?" She hugged him. He cuddled back. "You're not losing me. It's okay." He rubbed her back. "Hey, reporters, quit. Now! Do you want to piss her off again?"

They quit taking pictures and looked at Phil and Tony. "Can we ask why?" one asked Phil.

"Some wanna be warlord who thinks he can imitate me," Clint snorted. "He doesn't look like me. Can't shoot worth a damn. He's not flexible. No way in hell. Cap, we're good," he said, spotting him.

"What is she doing?" he asked.

"Trying really hard not to destroy humanity for that douchebag of an agent trying to get me killed and putting Barney in my house in my place for six months."

Steve looked at the other agent. "I want your side of it."

"I don't know who you are...."

"He's the director of SHIELD," a few of the reporters said.

"That would be Captain America," another said dryly. "If you don't know that, where did you grow up? Are you an alien? Even demons on other planes know who he is. Captain, fast question. That one bearing concubine you took in? Boy or girl and did she go back?"

"She did go back and it was a boy." They smiled at him. "Joyce even gave her a pretty baby blanket." They grinned and took notes on that. He looked at the idiot agent. "Which agency are you with?"

"He said FBI," Dawn said quietly. "I'm sorry, boss."

"No, I would've destroyed humanity for a threat to my family too," he said. "You've seen me nearly do it before, Dawn. I'm just glad we got you calmed down. Can you change back?" She shrugged and sighed, pushing her hair back. Natasha came out to walk her back inside.

"Why isn't she being put under arrest. Civilians aren't allowed to threaten agents!" Decker yelled.

"She's an adjunct SHIELD agent," Steve said dryly. "Why do you think?" The agent backed down. "Coulson, please call the head of the FBI for me?"

"I believe he's coming this way, Captain." He pointed. "That appears to be their sort of SUV."

Steve walked over when it stopped. "Your agent just tried to steal one of mine for an undercover that's unreasonable and deadly, then put his criminal, murdering brother in his place inside his house to harm his wife and children."

"What?" the local head of the FBI asked. He got out and walked over. "Decker," he sneered. "File." It was handed over so he looked at it. "This Barton?"

"Hawkeye?" Tony suggested. "Blond guy with the bow? Husband of the one they just pissed off to the point where she was going to lose it?"

The FBI head sighed but mostly ignored him. "This brother?"

"Wanted for killing about a hundred-twenty people," one of the reporters said. "He keeps being given new bodies." She looked at Stark. "That's kinda comic book."

Tony nodded. "We noticed. We even think there's another clone of Deadpool running around doing it."

"Aww, the one that Dawn flirted with?" Tony nodded. "Greatness!" She shuddered.

"Basically," Xander agreed.

The head of the local FBI office looked at him. "Why do you have a battle axe?"

"I'm Alexander, God Protectorate of Humanity." He let out his glow. "Nephew of Thor." The FBI head winced. "It's my job to protect humanity. This time I was going to back Dawn up killing Agent Decker here so the rest of humanity would be spared."

Phil looked at him. "I would've helped more."

"She has poisons on her, Coulson, and Xander probably needs a workout," Tony said. "So why don't you both go spar with Dawn for a while until she calms down?" He could still see a bright green glow from one window.

Xander looked up then at him. "She's interrogating Barney. He's vowing up and down on his soul that he's never going to hurt her kids or her family because he knows how well she'll kill him after torturing him." He grinned. "I taught Dawn so well."

"You did," Tony agreed. "Especially since that demon took her idea to glue his front to a popcorn ceiling." One of the reporters laughed. "From his knees to his neck," Tony told her. They all shuddered. "Full naked skin contact from what I heard. So yes. Please go help Dawn calm down?" he asked nicely. They nodded, going to do that. Tony sighed in pleasure once they were gone. He looked at Steve. "Joyce?"

"Safe. Bruce has her." He looked at the local head of the FBI office. "So, Under Director Mullins. What are we going to do about this?"

"I'm going to fire that agent," he said. "This isn't his first bad idea. Are you going to charge Summers?"

"No. This man nearly caused her children to be harmed and her husband. We wouldn't have let her destroy anyone but him but I'm not going to arrest her for it."

"Fine. Can you make her go to the other coast?"

"No," Tony said. "She's our assistant." The Under Director huffed. "Tough. Dawn will calm down. She didn't mean to threaten everyone. She was just really mad. Any good spouse would be that mad. If you don't love them enough to kill the people threatening them then you don't really love your spouse."

"I guess," he muttered. "Decker, car. We have a meeting with the Director when we get back." He trudged that way. "Why are the reporters here?"

"SHIELD agents rushed here. We knew it was a problem if they rushed that way," one said. "That's our job. We report on emergencies or Avengers battles."

Tony nodded. "Some of them do great business with the coffee shop in the other tower." One of them smiled at him. He looked at the Under Director again. "I hope this goes better than the last thing we had to work on together?"

"I'm hoping so as well, Mr. Stark. Just...calm her down?"

"She's got both spouses and people she can spar with if she needs to. She'll be calm soon enough," Tony said. He nodded and went back to their SUV's to go back to the office. He had an agent to beat to death for endangering humanity. Tony looked at Steve, who shook his head. "The alarm finally off?"

"We turned it off. Coulson programmed the most annoying alarm ever for that one." He looked at them. "What?"

"There's an alarm for when Dawn loses her temper?"

"For when she lets go with major amounts of magic," Tony corrected. "That way we can find out where and when she's beating people who've tried to kidnap her." They laughed but left since the crisis was over with. He looked at Steve again. "Go save the kids?"

"Sure." He went up to do that. Dawn was cuddled in Clint's lap, head on his shoulder. Xander and Phil were having some coffee, talking to Natasha. "That target, can we deal with him in other ways?"

"They wanted him to infiltrate since the idiot had died," Natasha said. "It's not tenable even if they had perfected an illusion for him. He had no skill and a lot of pretension. Earlier he thought I was Dawn and she was me. He called her Agent Romanoff."

"You don't look a thing alike," Xander quipped.

"He was an idiot," Natasha reminded him. "Stupidity knows no bottom to their well." She sipped her coffee, watching Dawn calm down. "She's calmer."

"Then why is there a green glow?"

"Have we checked Liz?" Clint asked. Steve hurried to check her. Yup it was Liz losing her temper and Callia was trying to calm her down. Steve picked her up to walk her off so he could calm her down. She was little so she cried a bit and was better. "Anyone else really tired?" Phil nodded he was.

"I could use a good nap," Natasha said. "I think it's her exhaustion."

"JARVIS, we're going to take a short nap," he said.

"I'll tell Mr. Stark of that fact. There's a throw blanket behind the left throw pillow, Agent Barton."

"We're good, thanks, JARVIS." He flipped them so Dawn was smooshed against the back of the couch and he was holding her, protecting her. Dawn sighed in pleasure, wrapping herself around him to give him more room on the couch. That worked for them and Natasha sat at the foot of the couch to watch over them. Xander went to talk to Liz. Phil got a report from Natasha for the records. He was sure someone would be complaining sometime soon. They noticed when the battle outfit faded to Dawn's suit. Not like anyone would care that her bare leg was over her husband's thigh. He surely didn't.

Pepper leaned in and blushed. "She had been wearing her battle outfit," Phil said.

"I saw. How did she do that?" He shrugged but smiled slightly. "Great. Liz?" He pointed. "Thank you. Are they...."

"Napping," Natasha said.

"That's great. You know, if you want to leave SHIELD you can be Dawn's helper, Natasha. There's too much work for her and Linda." She went to check on her daughter, who was snuggling her uncle. She picked her up to look at her. "You have to let us handle adult things."

"I will, Mom," she said quietly. "I just got really mad. So did Auntie."

"So did I but I don't glow." Liz hugged her and she cuddled her. "We'll figure it out together." Liz nodded and pushed her down so she could snuggle her and her uncle.

Tony walked in. "Xander, are you stealing my wife and daughter?"

"She demanded," Pepper said with a smirk for him. "Like I'd put up with anyone else?"

"Good point." He kissed her, then Liz on the head. "Dawn?"

"Taking a nap being protected by Clint. Her clothes changed back."

"Wonderful." He went to glance in there, nodding at Phil. "Liz has him wrapped around her fist again."

"I figured she does. He does like the children." Tony nodded and left them to handle Dawn's calming down. He had to stop his two geniuses from making something evil. He could hear them arguing over repulsor (Chris) or chemical weapons (Callia). He walked into the room they were in. "The FBI is harming their own agent. If he comes back we'll figure out how to handle him in the most messy way possible."

"MB said biotech is working on something that'll make your insides explode," Callia offered with a smile.

He looked at her. "Bit psychotic today are we?"

"Yup, because he was going to have my cousins killed and I was going to kill the fucker for it. If he survived Liz and Auntie Dawn."

"Which he wouldn't. I was standing right there and would've gotten him to spare humanity from the fit." He stared at her. "Besides, Dawn's got a poison that already does that." She huffed. He walked off happier. His kids would bug Dawn later about the poisons. They could learn that so they could learn how to counter them. It'd do them good. He went to the infirmary to take something for his nerves. Dr. Pigalli looked at him. "Pepper's Valiums are locked up."

She handed him one. "That's the only one."

"Thanks." He took it and dry swallowed. "Dawn's calmer. Clint's calmer." He spotted
Barney and his lack of mouth. "At least you'll have less fun on prison."

Barney wrote on the pad someone had given him. //I know better than to piss off Dawn or hurt the kids. She taught me that lesson easily. I was going to take out the agent to show my loyalty to the family.//

Tony smirked. "Good." He walked off to go take his own rest. He was really tired. "JARVIS, do we have a sleep spell or something going on?"

"I believe Dawn may still be broadcasting a bit, sir, but it's calming down the deeper asleep she's going."

"Sure, we can handle a siesta today. It's a good day for it." He went up to make himself a margarita since it was siesta time. It seemed to fit. Maeve was in the daycare. Tony got the huge couch all to himself. Yup, a great day for a siesta. And napping meant he didn't have to deal with city officials when they showed up. That was Coulson's job.

Downstairs, Phil looked up with a scowl. "Fine, Stark," he muttered. Natasha looked at him. "He's taken a margarita to his nap on the couch up there. He said I could deal with city officials."

"I don't wish to and Dawn probably won't be able to."

"Sure." He went to stop him since he saw him coming up the street when he looked. He came out the doors and walked him off. "Sir, the situation is handled."

"What happened?" Phil explained it briefly and the Mayor stared at him. "Is she under arrest?"

"No. We are not going arrest her for that. Frankly the rest of us wouldn't have allowed ourselves to be stopped." The Mayor glared. "Nor is that a matter for the NYPD to butt into." He walked off. "Everyone else is recovering and napping." He went back inside to talk to Natasha. They hadn't chatted in a while. He missed them all living in the same building. The Mayor huffed off to talk to his police commissioner, who agreed. That wasn't a state or local charge. He had no jurisdiction. They'd have to figure it out later.

TBC....