Congrats, You're a Good Friend. by Voracity2
Summary: Larissa has a lot of home problems so she clings to the only good thing in her life, Suzette. Also Xander has to do the hated thing and fight for the Powers. Better the evil you know....
Categories: Buffy Stories & Crossovers > Avengers Characters: None
Series: Congrats Series
Chapters: 2 Completed: Yes Word count: 23874 Read: 63254 Published: 12/22/2014 Updated: 12/22/2014

1. Part 1 by Voracity2

2. Part 2 by Voracity2

Part 1 by Voracity2
Congrats, You're a Good Friend.







Sam Wilson looked out the door of the room his group was meeting in. He saw a familiar head of tiny hair just peeking around the door and sighed. "What are you doing here?" he demanded, stomping over to glare at her. "Your father's got to be having conniptions." He pulled out his phone to text him.

"I wanted to talk." She grimaced but waved at the others. "I was going to be polite and wait. Sorry."

"Guys, this is Suzette Rogers, a future slayer." She slunk into a seat. His phone beeped so he sent back another message. "Your dad's not real pleased with you."

She shrugged. "I came to talk. You understand all that stuff and the future slayer stuff too."

"You are?" one of the soldiers asked.

She nodded. "Yeah."

"How did you get down here?"

She smirked a tiny bit. "The airplane brought me?" Sam scowled, hands on his hips. She huffed. "We can talk after you help them. Just like you help the big slayers with their nightmares and problems. They probably have the same things and some day I will too. I can wait."

He stared at her then huffed. "Fine." He looked at his group, who all did various levels of shrugging. "Anyone want to talk about any new problems?" Sam asked more calmly. No answer. "Anyone got anything they want to talk about?"

"I can go hide in the hall so I don't have to hear what I'll have to go through some day," Suzette said. "You guys did good things to protect people and I'm sorry you guys had to get nightmares because of it." She looked at them. "Sometimes doing the right thing is suckier than the bad things are doing. Dad had to take down a whole lot of agents to get rid of the bad guys and he's still got nightmares about it, but it was the right thing to do."

One of them patted her on the head. "Sometimes that's the price we pay for doing what we thought was right."

Suzette nodded. "Some day I'll get that. Right now I have different nightmares." Sam stared at her. She shrugged. "I can't tell Dad that stuff. He'll get sad and have even more nightmares."

"That's why we talk to Sam too," one of the other soldiers quipped. "Because we can't dirty our spouses or lovers with it." The others all nodded.

"I'm pretty sure that's why most slayers are single," Suzette sighed. "Which sucks for them. They'd all like boyfriends. So if you guys know nice guys who don't mind what they have to do for a duty, please introduce them. Especially if you can get one for Miss Buffy. She *really* needs a boyfriend to make her have happier times." Sam rolled his eyes, looking up and shaking his head. A few of them grinned at her. But they all understood and they could talk in front of her, without getting too graphic. Suzette got to hug one that was staring at his hands. He patted her back but he quit staring at his hands like they were dirty.

At the end of the session, once the others had gone, Sam stared at her, leaning on his lectern. "You're still having nightmares about the lab stuff?" he asked quietly. She nodded, staring up at him. "You can talk to your dad."

"I don't want to make him dirty with that stuff. He's already got bad thoughts about all that. Daddy doesn't need any more nightmares. He still has ones about when we had to hide all of us."

"Maybe but you can talk to him. He'll just get mad and destroy a few punching bags."

"Then he'll call you so I'm cutting out the middleman and saving the punching bags for other things," she quipped.

"What would you have done if I wasn't here?"

"I have money for a cab. I would've had a nice adult sort call me one and make sure I got into it. I would've paid him to get me to your place. I would've told him my mom was at work so she was sending me to my dad at home."

"And if I wasn't there?"

"Two of your neighbors have dogs. I would've sat there and petted them until you got home." He scowled. She shrugged. "I'm not helpless."

"There are bad people out there," he said firmly. "Including ones that drive cab, Suzette. You could have been snatched or hurt greatly by one of them. For that matter, how did you get down here?" he demanded.

"I bought the ticket with my shopping card. Then I went to the airport. The cab driver dropped me off in the line and the security guard watched me get my ticket from the machine. Then I got through security with a family because I told them they were waiting on me on the other side, I had to run back to the car for something I forgot." He scowled. "The check-in lady just pinned a thing to my shirt so they knew I was flying alone. Airplanes fly kids every day."

"Your dad is losing his mind. The school told him you escaped."

She snorted. "I sent Auntie Pepper an email. It's just a spa day so she hadn't checked her phone in a while."

He stared at her. "What's that bad you couldn't Skype?"

"I didn't want Daddy to overhear," she huffed. She pouted.

"Fine. We'll go to my place. You will call your father once we get there. Then we'll talk." She was looking out in the hall. "Someone else probably needs the room." He started to gather up the stuff he brought to meetings.

"Not likely," she said. She got up and walked out, staring up at her other uncle. "Hi."

He stared down at her. "Your father called everyone to find you when he heard you weren't at school."

"How long did it take?" she quipped with a smile.

"Just before I got here. They want to talk to you about your blackmail target," Bucky said sarcastically.

"I only blackmailed him about fudging his counts in PE."

"So?" He stared down at her. Then at Sam. "I'll drive her."

"You can probably understand better than most people," he agreed. "My place, one hour. I'll calm down Steve." He put things away and let them walk out to Bucky's rental car. He had wondered when she would open up about that stuff.

Bucky waited until they were on the street to look at her. "You are having nightmares about the lab?" he asked in Russian.

She stared at him. "You know about that?"

"They're who did my arm," he said blandly.

"Oh." She blinked. "They were teaching me stuff."

"I'm sure they were trying. They did with others like Natasha."

"She's not comfy with that topic," she said in Russian. She shifted to look at him. "I don't want to use what they taught me."

"So don't."

"I may need it as a slayer. And I found myself thinking back to it during a class." He pulled off the side of the highway to stare at her. "They were teaching me to not like people, to be mean to them. I don't want to be like that."

"Good. You should never want to go there unless you have to."

"How do you know when it's time to be mean?"

"When you need it, you'll know. There's not a lot of times it's necessary but if you're attacked, you'll know when it's time."

She grimaced. "I sometimes feel like I should be mean to some of my classmates who are annoying. Just super annoying and I know I shouldn't. I keep remembering how many ways they showed us people could be mean. Even though I couldn't do half of them even at your age." He nodded, staring at her. She huffed and pointed at the car that pulled up behind theirs.

Bucky looked in the mirror then rolled down the window. "We're talking about why she felt she had to cut school," he told the officer.

"That's fine, sir. Just checking to make sure it wasn't a problem."

"He's my favorite uncle," she said with a grin. "He's chewing on me before Daddy gets me."

The officer smiled. "That's a great thing. Means you won't do it again and need to see me for the bad reasons later on." He nodded at Bucky and left to go back to his car.

Bucky reached over to take her knife from her hand and toss it into the backseat while making sure the officer wasn't watching. "That was not a reason for that."

She huffed quietly but pouted. "We had one pretending to be a police officer the other day to show us what to do if the school was attacked. Or he could've been a bad guy in a pretend uniform."

"I'll be helping your father fix that," he said firmly. That brought up all sorts of bad ideas, which she was probably flashing back to as well. He tipped her chin up, staring at her. "You can always talk to myself and Xander. He knows what they were teaching you because he got your files first."

"You were there though."

"I was in something similar until Xander rescued me."

"Is that why you had no memories for a few months?" she asked. "I remember Andrew saying something about that when we were hiding." He nodded. "That's even worse." He nodded again. "Do they know who my mother is? Was she violent?"

"Only when they made them be mean."

"Oh." She sighed. "Do we know who she was?"

"Slightly but not fully." She stared at him. "It's a bit...complicated beyond what you're ready for. Even though they did much teaching you the wrong things, hearing about your mother is going to confuse you worse until you're older."

"Oh. Is she alive?"

"Yes."

"Can I meet her without telling her I'm her kid?"

"You've already met them."

"Oh. Okay." She blinked a few times. She watched a car go past them. "That's the third time they've went past us."

"Crap," he said, starting the car and driving off. "The blue one?" She nodded. "I recognize one of them. They're formerly SHIELD." She slunk down in her seat. "They will not get you."

"You've got all the weapons." She looked back for her ceramic knife.

"If you had them could you use them?" he asked.

"Kind of. They taught me how to shoot, but I told Natasha they were still teaching me parts."

"We will speak of that later," he said. "You may be trying to protect yourself but you should never lie to your father. You'll get that hurt look." He grimaced. He hated that look. Always had.

"I know that look," she muttered. "I hate that look." He shot a smirk at her. "I know." She pointed. "I've seen his picture."

"He was another one but I think he's still SHIELD." He pulled off the highway and headed for Sam's house. It was easier to lose a tail in a residential neighborhood full of grocery places and fast food places.

***

Steve hung up from talking to the principal and had his phone beep with a text message. "How did she get to DC?" he demanded. "Stark!"

"Sir had nothing to do with the young miss getting to DC, sir," JARVIS said calmly. "She used her shopping card from the Council. By the cameras at the airport she managed to finagle her way through the system with not-quite lies and half-truths."

Steve huffed, hands on his hips. "I've got to paddle her for that." Clint walked off the elevator, then paused and slowly walked backwards toward the elevator. "Not you, Clint. My daughter blackmailed a kid at school to help her escape, which they did not discover for over three hours, and she's now in DC."

Clint blinked. "Your kid's good," he said with a grin.

"She's going to be paddled. She could have called. Or told me and I would've taken her down to talk to Sam."

"She probably didn't want to worry you about the stuff she learned in that lab that created her," Clint said. "She mentioned something about that when she woke up from a nap on the couch last week."

Steve sighed, but nodded. "I figured it was about that." He sent out a text to a few contacts, getting one back. "Bucky's in DC. Within twenty of Sam's current group therapy session."

"Well, he'd know how to help her best," Clint said. Steve nodded, taking some deep, clearing his mind breaths. Just like Sam had taught him. Clint slowly eased back into the room. "You heading down?"

"Yeah. Just so Sam can stop me when I beat her to death for that."

Clint tried not to smile. "You've got to admit your little girl has brains and she's good. It'll help her protect herself some day."

"It's not today," Steve said, stomping off. "JARVIS, please make my plane reservations down there?"

"Yes, sir," the AI said. "You're flying from United. I've sent the e-ticket to your phone, Captain."

"Thank you." He punched the elevator button a bit too hard but it only dented. He calmed himself again as he stepped onto the elevator. The flight down to DC was usually an hour but it'd seem like forever until he could shake some sense into his little girl.

Clint quickly texted the rest of the team and all those who should know. Pepper sent back she had gotten an email from her and had just checked. Stark didn't answer but they all heard the lock down for the labs start. Then he heard Darcy yelling it wasn't that big of an emergency. Suzette wasn't going to come hide with them since she was in DC. The alarm went off again.

Natasha came off the elevator shaking her head. "I pity that child when her father grabs her."

"Steve's not the kind to beat her to death for real. She'll probably get that same 'pissed off Captain' look and a long lecture. Maybe a few spankings."

"Back in his day, there was no restrictions on beating sense into a child," she reminded him.

"Yeah but Sam'll stop him."

"Point."

He got some coffee and put on hot water for her. "The school didn't tell him for a few hours."

"Was she that good or were they that poor?" Natasha asked.

"I'm pretty sure it's a case of both," he admitted. "Especially since they had an invasion drill the other day." He sipped his coffee, staring at her.

"That too shall stop," she said as she walked off. She and Maria Hill could have lunch.

Clint grinned because that would be stopping all the problems at the SHIELD school forever.

***

Steve got there just as Xander hit everyone bursting into Sam's condo with a sleep grenade. He stared at him. "Hi."

Xander grinned. "Hi. She's hiding under Sam's bed, where Bucky told her to go."

"Thank you."

"We saw the charge on the card."

"Tell me," Steve said, staring at him.

"We figured the school had and you were tracking it by then."

Steve shook his head. "I didn't hear until after she made it down here."

"Sure, we'll mark it to let you know immediately." Steve nodded and headed in there. Xander stared at the guys pulling up in cruisers. He held up his ID. "These nice idiots were invading a person that the Council leans on to help the slayers with things."

"Armorer?" one of the officers asked, carefully moving closer.

"Therapist. He works with the VA."

"Oh." They looked at the downed agents. "Any idea who they are or were?"

Xander pointed. "He's HYDRA. I know that for a fact." They nodded and got them arrested. "I used a fume bomb, guys. Everyone in the house is okay and safely out of harm's way."

"That's good," another officer agreed. "When did you get here?"

"When the emergency alarm went off. We have a pre-slayer in there talking to him."

"That's a good thing. He couldn't...." He waved a hand.

Xander smiled. "If I knock out agents it's a lot less paperwork than if he knocks out bad agents." A few officers laughed but one attacked him. Xander moved to block his attack, letting him hit the doorframe with his second attempt. Then Xander brought him down and had him in a choke hold. "Hi," he said with a grin. "Who are you with?"

"The slayers need to be saved from this stupid new ways," he groaned, trying to get free.

"Aawww, you're an old liner," Xander quipped then knocked him out. "No, we don't let you have the girls because you used to abuse them." He walked over him, shrugging at the others. "I'm sure you've heard the old council was horrible to them." They all nodded. Xander leaned in. "Sam, we all good?" he called. He could hear pitiful sniffling from Suzette.

"Yeah, she's still good," he said, coming to the door. He looked at the officer then at Xander. "You?"

"He attacked me."

"Of course." He sipped his coffee. "We had a slayer decide to run away from school earlier to come talk to me, Officers. Her dad just got here." They all smiled at him.

"From New York," Xander added with a grin. A few of them groaned. "She's safely talking to others." He shifted, looking at Sam then behind him. He shot the demon. It yelped and ran out the doorway and past the officers. "Thanks for not bothering Sam," he called with a wave after him. "Salt water," he told Sam. "I like super soakers for that."

Sam nodded, going back inside. "Thanks, Xander."

"Welcome," he quipped. "I'm a good helpful sort." The officers gave him funny looks but they could handle this. The supervising agent could handle the watcher and the officer that had tried to attack him. Bucky and Steve were hiding in case the officers remembered them tearing up parts of DC during their battle. They didn't want to explain being arrested.

***

After dinner, which Sam had insisted was not for talking about anything important over, Steve and Bucky stared at Suzette, who was in her own chair while they sat on the couch. Traffic outside was a huge wreck so they couldn't leave yet. Steve looked at Bucky, who shrugged back. "We all need to calm down."

"You can teach her about stuff you two used to do when you were her age. That way she learns more age appropriate things," Sam offered. "Since she was doing things that should be well above her actual age."

"They didn't have games back then," Suzette said, staring at Sam oddly.

"We had a few board games," Steve said dryly, smirking at her. "Mostly we made our own fun. Things like jumping rope and hopscotch."

"What's that?" she asked, looking confused.

"You draw a board on the ground with chalk, toss a rock, then hop the pattern but missing wherever the rock lands," Bucky said. Sam grabbed an erasable marker off his note board on the fridge. Bucky took her outside to show her that. Steve followed. Sam got to take pictures because Captain America hopscotching was too cute to not memorialize.

***

Once Steve and Bucky were in a hotel room, with Suzette heavily asleep in her bed, Steve looked at Bucky. "Thanks."

"Welcome. She needed to talk about that. She was having feelings about using some of what they had started to train her to do. Especially on some bullies at school."

"I've been told Maria Hill came down on the school extra hard this time."

"Good! Ours wouldn't have went more than twenty minutes before realizing we had snuck out." Steve grinned at him. "She also asked about her mom. I told her it was complicated and she had met her maternal donor but they weren't talking about it yet because it was so complicated." Steve sighed, sitting down while staring at her. "I don't know," he said, sitting down as well. "It is very complicated."

"It is," he agreed. "The explanation Bruce used went over my head. Much less hers."

"She's really smart, Steve."

"I know. I'm proud that she is. The smartass parts are a bit too overdeveloped but she's my little girl." Bucky smirked at him. "I know why she did it but I still want to paddle her."

"Our mothers would have beaten us," Bucky said quietly. "And then made us apologize to everyone while we still couldn't sit."

"True. My mother would've taken a strap to me."

"My mother liked switches."

Steve nodded with a grin. "I remember." Bucky hit him on the arm. "How do I handle what they were teaching her?"

"I taught her how to know when it was the time to pull it out. The same as I do."

Steve nodded. "We can work on that. Natasha?"

"She said it makes Natasha sad to talk about such things," Bucky said quietly, glancing toward the bedroom.

Steve looked back there. "We're still here. Go back to bed, Suzette." She went to the bathroom then went back to bed. He sighed, looking at his best friend. Who shrugged back. He went in there to lay beside her until she fell asleep. Steve seriously felt he had failed somewhere but he wasn't sure where. Hopefully Bucky and the others could help. Especially Sam, who could help her with the small bit of flashing back she was doing.

***

Suzette came off the elevator followed by her father and favorite uncle. Darcy was waiting, arms crossed over her chest, one foot tapping. Suzette slunk closer. "I'm sorry."

"You and I are talking, young lady," Darcy assured her. "You have common sense. You know how to use it I'm sure." She stared down at her. "Did you even think about what would happen if you got caught at the airport?" She held up her slayer identification papers. Darcy snorted. "Not cute. That means you planned it ahead?"

"I knew I needed to talk to Uncle Sam. I should've left a note."

"A note!" Darcy said loudly, making her flinch. "Do you honestly think a *note* would've kept me from yelling? Or your dad from spanking? If you had *spoken* to us, we would've made sure you could've gotten to Sam without risking yourself being snatched or hurt or kidnaped, or stabbed, or poisoned, or even in a car accident where we didn't know!"

"Darcy, ease off," Steve said. "We had that talk last night."

"It's about time she realizes that more than you care about her well being." She stared at him.

He nodded. "She started to worry about what you'd say over breakfast."

She snorted. "She's really lucky I haven't asked anyone how to do a seance to get my grandmother to talk to her. Grandma Lewis would've had *words* for this, in a few languages. Not to mention Nana Alman!"

Suzette swallowed hard but pulled her closer to hug her. "I'm sorry I worried you, Auntie Darcy. I didn't mean to."

"You know how to open your mouth and ask things, I've seen you do it."

Suzette nodded, staring up at her. "I do. I should have. I know what sensible things were and I should have done that. I should've just skipped school and talked to you or Daddy or even called Uncle Bucky to talk." She sighed. "I'll do that next time."

"You'd better," Darcy promised. "Nana Alman made sure I knew the many uses of a wooden spoon, including how to use it to correct a bad girl. She fixed mine often enough with one."

"That's gotta be slightly better than a switch," Bucky said.

"That's Grandpa Alman's correction method. That's for coming home to find a body on the carpet," Darcy quipped, staring at him. "I found an accident victim and the cops hadn't gotten there yet." She looked at the young girl. "Now, let's go talk like the adult you're pretending to be."

"You don't know about this stuff. It's bad stuff. Not normal girl stuff."

She leaned down to look at Suzette in the eye. "I once tazed Thor." Suzette's eyes went wide. "I've seen the battles and had to fight during the one in London a tiny bit. Bet me I haven't seen or heard enough bad things to understand, even if it hasn't happened to me. You went to Sam and he hadn't been there."

"Point, I guess." She looked at Bucky then up at Darcy. "I was found in a lab."

"I know that." She hugged her with a huff, sitting down with Suzette in her lap. "We all know that they were trying to make you the next Natasha, pumpkin. We were waiting on you to want to talk to us about it. Steve said you would when you were ready but you didn't trust us."

"It'd make Daddy dirty," she said quietly, not looking at him.

Darcy made Suzette look at her. "Do you think your dad was in at least two war zones without seeing nasty things?" Suzette gaped. "Your dad broke military orders and rank to go after your Uncle Bucky in a lab just like made you where they were doing some of the same mean things to him. That was back when he was on the stage singing about being a soldier, not being one. Then he went to remove the rest of the bad guy's labs and stuff, seeing all the bad things they did there as they freed their hostages. They may have gotten your uncle again when he fell off a train, because bad guys are tough and sometimes you can't defeat them right off, but he saw plenty of bad things. Okay?

"Your dad's not an angel. Your Uncle Bucky's not an angel. I'm closer to one but I've seen plenty of bad things. Your Aunt Natasha certainly has too and Clint saw some of them with her. Stark saw some when he got taken hostage by some. You're surrounded by people who have seen the nastiest things humans can do to each other. Anything you've seen is mildly muddy compared to most of theirs." Suzette sucked in her top lip. "Really. The old saying is 'war is hell'. And it is. It's a hell that man gave to himself and uses periodically on each other. You can't tell your dad anything that he hasn't seen worse of. Or your Uncle Bucky if you want to talk to him about it since he was there."

"Everyone expects me to be shiny and I'm not," Steve agreed, sitting across from them. "Really, Suzette. I've seen plenty of evil things and nothing you got exposed to was that bad yet. Nothing they taught you was even a tenth of what they did back during the war that I had to stop. Or even a hundredth of what they did to Natasha and Bucky. All you have to do is talk to us. We'll help you with those things."

She nodded, letting her lip go. "Why weren't there other kids there? Just me and her?"

"They had originally tried for six kids but only those two embryos survived the process," Steve said honestly.

"In IVF, which they had to have used, that's about normal. You can try for years to get one live embryo implanted," Darcy said. "I've got a friend who tried for two years before the twins she finally had caught."

"How does that work?" Suzette asked.

"You know how babies come from sperm and egg cells?" Darcy asked. She nodded.

"When did you learn that?" Steve asked.

"I asked Auntie Jane where babies came from," she said. "She told me."

Darcy smiled. "I walked in at the end and we talked about how she didn't really *need* that information yet but one of her friends was getting another sibling. Then I told her to come talk to you about that."

"Daddy can't have babies on his own so I don't have to worry about attention stealing babies yet," Suzette said.

"Unlike Larissa's mom, I'd pay attention to both of you," Steve said.

"And never say that around Rosenburg, she can do that," Bucky quipped, sitting down. "She's threatened to get Xander a few times."

"Eww. That would be a bad thing," Suzette said. "Very unethical." They all nodded. "Huh. Daddy?"

"No, if we have more kids in the family there'll be a mother there."

"Cool. The suit probably wouldn't look right with a big belly."

Darcy shook her head quickly to clear that image. She flapped a hand. "Online stuff." Steve and Bucky both groaned. "Sorry." She looked at her. "Anyway, they took your mom and dad's cells to make the egg and sperm cells then implanted it into someone so you'd grow."

"Is that like planting trees?"

"Not exactly and it's real sciency. You'd have to ask Bruce about how they do it. All I know is there's a dish and a long tube involved," Darcy said.

"Oh. So they only made us?"

"They were trying to make more," Steve said.

"Can they still make more?"

"There's only a few people who worked in that lab still available to do science," Bucky said, delicately for him.

"Did you kill 'em?" she asked. "Because that deserves a hug."

"Xander got most of them for you." She hugged him anyway then came back to sit on Darcy.

"What about my big brother?" she asked.

"He's still in some training camp no one can find because it's apparently mythical," Bucky said. "We're still looking for those boys."

"Is he okay?"

"Probably. We'll have to spend more time getting him free of them." She nodded. "Then he'll need time to heal like I had."

"Was he made like I was?" Steve nodded. "How did they do that when you were frozen, Dad?"

"We're not totally sure but we think someone had an injury so they got some tissue or blood from that and froze it," Bucky said.

She pouted but nodded. "If I get a sibling that's younger, what if I try to hurt them?" she asked quietly, looking up at Darcy.

"Sweetie, there's no reason for you to try that and we'd stop you. We'd stop you instantly."

"I kinda wanted to do that to a few classmates though. You didn't stop me there."

"We weren't watching then, we are now," Steve said. "And we're going to be talking about that stuff so you don't have those urges."

"They're kinda butts, Dad. I usually have that urge," she muttered, looking down.

"Some kids are bullies," Bucky said. "Your dad got his face hit many times by that sort of kid." Steve nodded that was true, relaxing slightly. "We can teach you how to deal with bullies and how to suppress those urges."

"Your teacher should be stopping them," Darcy said. "That's how modern teachers do it. Bullying is a huge no-no in today's world."

Suzette looked up at her. "Maybe it's because they're future agents?"

"Maybe, but still not a good thing to teach them. No one wants to work with someone like that, even as agents. Agents like that get fired and go to jail for doing bad things." She gave her a squeeze. "I'd hope you weren't."

"No. I've tried to walk away and the other kids are trying to pick on me. Larissa sticks up for me and reminds me that we can't hurt humans. They're not bad demons. Is she okay? I used the other kid so she wouldn't get into trouble."

"She's pouting that you didn't tell her," Darcy said dryly. "We emailed this morning." Suzette slumped but nodded. "You two can talk on Monday. You're out tomorrow while we finish talking."

"Yes, ma'am," she said quietly. She looked at her uncle then her father. "Can't I hit them just once?"

"Not unless you catch them picking on someone weaker or it's to defend yourself," Steve said. "That gets you in more trouble than them."

"The teacher gives me disappointed looks each time I walk off."

"I'll be talking to him," Steve assured him.

"I can help," Bucky said with a smirk for Steve. Steve nearly shuddered at that look. He knew it and it was a bad one. "I'll be pleasant."

"Good," Steve said.

Darcy looked at the kid in her lap. "The only right time to get into a fight is if you're defending someone who can't do it on their own or you need to defend yourself. Or it's something like a demonic invasion."

She nodded. "I get that. They still pick on me."

"Did you beat them in gym class?" Darcy asked. "I suggested that."

Suzette looked up at her and nodded. "And in sparring during self defense class." Steve sighed, shaking his head. "They said that most parents had agreed because bad guys could come for them for having parents who are agents," she said.

"I heard. I'm not sure how I feel about that." He looked at her. "Is it making you want to fight more?"

"No, just the urges to smite the little assholes."

"Language. You don't want more grounded time," Steve warned her. "Or spanked." She shrank back against Darcy's chest. Steve calmed himself down again. "We'll talk to your principal and teacher tomorrow, Suzette. That needs to be straightened out."

"Thank you. Can I still beat them?"

"Yup. In anything they challenge you to," Bucky said. "If they challenge you to a race, you beat them. You get better grades than them."

"One's a giant computer brain."

Bucky snorted. "Did they tinker with him?"

"Yeah, they did," Steve said. He leaned back in his seat. "Someone did try to hype his brain functions. His father was a scientist at SHIELD and his mother took custody of him after the kid ended up in the ER with seizures from it. He's still in jail from what I heard. Is he picking on you?" She shook her head. "Just a few?" She nodded. "How many?"

"Five. Jenkins and his group."

"Hey, there's five kids we don't have to plan on coming to your upcoming birthday party," Darcy quipped with a smile for her. "Bullies never get to go to the good parties."

Suzette smiled at her. "Living well is the best revenge?"

"Yup. Sure is." Steve smirked back. "And she can bring in apology cookies Monday. Just twenty of them. I don't bake for bullies."

"They're not allowed to bring in baked goods. One of the kids has a wheat allergy and one has an egg allergy," Steve said.

"That sucks," Darcy said. "But sure. We can work around that." Suzette turned to hug her. She looked at Suzette. "Did he ground you?" She nodded, pouting. "Good. It means I don't have to add onto it for making us all worry that you had disappeared somewhere. Did you want us to worry about you? Jane started to cry thinking it was someone who had taken you."

"No, I didn't. I'll go apologize to Auntie Jane." She got free and went to do that. She didn't like to see sad people.

"Smooth," Steve said once she was gone. "She won't do it again."

"GOOD!" She crossed her legs. "How long is she grounded for?"

"All month. Including no fair."

Darcy smirked. "That's nearly evil, Steve. Congrats. Pepper said she wants to yell for you. Something about being a woman means she can do it better."

"I've got it. We handled it and she's punished and we've got it." She nodded she'd back off. Suzette came back up with Thor, who was advising her how he had beat bullies without the adults realizing it because he had embarrassed them greatly. "We'll help her handle it, Thor."

"She's a strong young girl. Some day she'll handle such matters on her own but not for years yet. She has much to learn and training years ahead of her first," Thor agreed, staring down at her. She nodded, pouting at him. "Good." He patted her on the head. "Next time, come talk to myself or Jane. If we do not know how to help you, we will help you find someone who can. That way your father does not age from worry." He walked off. "Darcy, Jane wanted those cookie bars you made last night."

"The last of them are in my personal fridge, Thor." He smiled and went to get them for his beloved.

"Cookies?" Suzette asked. Darcy snorted, staring at her. "Oh. Grounded. Yeah," she sighed. Darcy and Steve both nodded with a smirk. "Shoot."

"Next time you'll think about this before you act," she said. She gave her a hug. "Go sit on your father. He needs cuddles." She ran over to pounce her father to hug him.

"Did your mom use the same spoon?" Bucky asked.

Darcy shook her head. "No, anytime I got that bad, she shipped me off to one of the grandparents. I wasn't the sort of girl she expected. I didn't want to dance, be a cheerleader, be the sort of pretty girl that boys liked to grope. I didn't plan on giving her grandchildren.... I'm a pretty big failure on her scale. And I really don't care. I learned how to be a woman from my grandmothers. They were stronger ones anyway. My mother's only job in life was to find a husband who made enough money."

"My mother would've tried to make me girlish if I had been a girl but I probably wouldn't have been the sort," Steve said. "Being sickly I wasn't the pin up a lot of girls tried to be."

Bucky looked at him. "Did you actually consider being born a girl at some point?"

"Yeah, a few times. It might've been easier if I had been. At least then there's housecleaning jobs and the like back then."

Bucky shook his head with a sigh. "Do you maybe need to work on any questions for your gender identity?"

"Wow, that's a very modern ideal," Darcy quipped, smiling at him.

"One of the slayers came to Xander to talk to him about her physical gender disparity so I got to learn a lot. He helped her find someone to start on the process to change over."

"You can do that?" Steve asked.

"Yeah, Steve. Transexuals, those who truly believe they're born in the wrong body, can have surgery so the outside matches the inside feelings," Darcy said. "You have to go through a lot of therapy, hormones, and surgeries. You have to live as who you want to be for at least a year before you can go through a lot of it. Will that screw with the slayer essence?"

"No idea," Bucky said. "And he told her that."

"Does it all work?" Steve asked, covering Suzette's ears.

"Yeah, they can do that. It may need a pump since she's going to become a guy, but yeah, they can make it all work. You can't have kids, but it'll be there."

"Huh. That's really neat." He grinned. "We know a few guys who might've liked that."

Bucky nodded. "A few of them might've, yeah."

Suzette moved the hands off her ears. "Daddy, there's a girl in the class that thinks she's really a boy. They're talking to her about it but they're not happy. It means screwed up bathroom stuff."

"It's a long, hard road to get to the final surgery," Darcy said. "I hope you're helping her feel comfy?"

"I asked a lot of questions then hugged her and told her if that's who she really was then it was neat. It was like me being a future slayer." She shrugged. "She wants to change her name and cut her hair and stuff. The teacher's huffy about it."

"We can make sure she gets support from friends. Kids like that get picked on all the time," Darcy said. "It's always wrong to pick on kids for being different."

She nodded. "I try to help them." She looked up at her dad. "Should I use her name?"

"If she wants you to call her by a new name, use that," he said. "It's only right. That's who she really is."

She nodded. "I can do that." She blinked at Bucky then at him. "You knew someone like that?"

"We grew up around a few guys who liked to dress up as women," Bucky said. "And a few women who dressed and passed as guys. Unless I absolutely saw them outside the makeup and dresses, they got called by their female names or male names, whichever they were dressed as."

"I can do that. We can still help him with his hair, right?" Darcy nodded. "Cool. She...he wants a neat haircut that won't make his mom mad."

"Plenty of short haircuts look good on everyone," Darcy said with a smile. "You can bring in one of my magazines if you want."

"I can do that." She looked up at her father. "So this isn't a new thing?"

"There's not much you guys have or go through today that we didn't. We just didn't have computers to look stuff up on."

"Oh, wow." She snuggled into his lap then got up and ran to Bucky to hop into his lap and cuddle him, including pulling his arm over her to make him cuddle. "You were being left out."

He grinned. "I usually am. Girls don't like the arm."

She blew a raspberry. "Then they're dumb cunts."

"Language!" Darcy snapped. "Such a bad word!"

"Oops." She ducked down some. "Larissa's mommy uses it at bimbos."

"So? That's one of the worst things a woman can call another one, Suzette. Beyond that, bimbos exist because men expect some women to be trophies and not all that smart. The rest of us give them 'you poor pitiful puppy' looks because they learned the wrong lessons." Suzette relaxed. "Calling someone a cunt is the worst insult you can use to a female."

"Yes, Auntie Darcy. Sorry?"

"Don't do it again and tell Larissa."

"I can do that. She needs more girl stuff. Her mom's been too busy with the new baby and her other brother."

"Sometimes that happens in families. Larissa can pin her mother down to talk to her," Darcy said. "Or she can come hang out with you when you're not grounded."

"She likes doing that."

"In the old days, Larissa would be doing a lot of helping her mother take care of the babies," Steve said. "The older kids helped the younger kids so the mother could get stuff done around the house."

"They probably didn't go to school either," Darcy said dryly, staring at him. "We want both girls to grow up strong and smart and earn the title of 'bitch' for being the strong, forceful, protective sort."

"Point. Just telling her."

Darcy smiled. "Like the song says...."

"Please not that song," Bucky interrupted. Suzette giggled. "The girls had a dance party to that song when one got dumped by a cheating boyfriend. I was trapped in the kitchen for the two rounds of it."

"What song?" Steve asked. JARVIS popped up a video of the song in question so only he could hear it. "That's true, everyone's more complicated than just one thing. Most of those are stereotypes anyway. Everyone's more complex than just one stereotype."

"Exactly," Darcy agreed with a smile for him. Suzette giggled. "You, homework?"

"Probably," she grumbled but snuggled in better, looking up at him. "After dinner?"

"Sure. As long as it gets done."

"Yes, Uncle Bucky." She huffed but cuddled in and waited impatiently for dinner.

***

Steve smiled at the teacher and principal that were meeting with him when they joined him in the meeting room. "We have to talk about a few things."

"We should," the teacher said. "Your daughter doesn't seem to want to stick up for herself."

"No, she does. She doesn't want to have to take a human life by dealing with the bullies you're not doing anything about." The teacher winced. "Frankly, I'm siding with her. I got into plenty of fights with bullies. I walked away until it got to the point where they made me beat them. I didn't win real often back then but that's how I handled it. For that matter, bullying agents aren't the sort that we like to work with. They tend to end up in jail for doing the wrong thing. Is that really what you want those children to learn?"

The principal cleared his throat. "Was this bullying the reason she left that way?"

Steve nodded. "She wanted to go see Sam about that stuff. He's a counselor with the VA in DC that I'm friends with. Got through airport security and all that." He stared at him. "How long did it really take you to realize she was gone? My teachers would've known within twenty minutes. They always did. It took you three hours to tell me? What if she had been taken by HYDRA or someone?"

"We had people looking for her, Captain. We found her path and called you then."

"I want to know the minute she's missing," he said bluntly. "She's a bit too smart for her own good. She made it all the way to DC and to Sam's therapy session to talk to him, and had plans if he had already left." The principal winced. "Thankfully someone beyond Sam was there when HYDRA agents stormed his house trying to get her. Sam's great but he couldn't have beaten a bag and tag team of six people with the few weapons he had at home."

"I believe your daughter isn't living up to her potential," the teacher said.

"Is her schoolwork failing?"

"She's falling behind in other matters and a few of the teachers are worried about her liking to do things like cook."

Steve let out a bitter sounding laugh. "I'm well aware of where my daughter was made and initially raised, gentlemen, and she's not turning into the next Agent Romanoff for SHIELD. Her future isn't as an agent or even really helping agents for the most part. Though I will be helping her if possible when she's old enough to start patrol training." He stared at them. "I'm quite pleased that my daughter is well rounded and able to handle herself and her needs for the most part. Yes, slayers are to be well rounded today. They're not just warriors anymore. Now they're young women who have an unfortunate duty. The same as I do." The principal winced.

Steve stared at him. "I believe we've had a talk before about how my daughter is being militarized and I do not like it. She is here so she learns how to protect herself and others, not to be made to go back to the training they were doing to her. For that matter, if you make my daughter have another flashback I can't guarantee she won't kill another student. She's so far managed to get herself out of them but we have evidence she's had a few flashbacks thanks to the forced militarization she's been undergoing."

He stared at the teacher, who swallowed hard. "My daughter does not need to know what to do in an invasion scenario beyond how to get to the safe room or the way out. She is *eight*. She does not need to know more about weapons until I think she's ready for that. Yes, Bucky taught her how to sharpen knives. When HYDRA had him, they taught him a lot about knives and he had experience he passed on at the beginning level while I watched. I do not want my daughter handling firearms here. Or staff weapons or any other form of weapon. I certainly don't want the five kids who are bullies in her class to have access to weapons so they can pick on other children with them. Because I have heard and talked to the other parents."

"I need to get back to my class," the teacher said stiffly.

"Don't worry, Maria's kindly given them a sub for a few hours." His eyes went wide. The principal started to move. "Sit. Down. We're going to finish this talk while she watches over your students. She's incredibly busy but she agreed that the students needed specific handling to get them used to being real people who might some day want to be agents. Less than one percent of all students in this school will go on to be any sort of agent, much less SHIELD agents. That's just the math of recruiting from what she's said about recruiting classes." He stared at them. "I'm frankly quite peeved about how some of the students have been treated, including my own and Larissa. Her mother and I talk at least weekly.

"She's highly unamused by what you're teaching her daughter and has told Larissa's biological father. Who happens to be on two different SHIELD lists." The principal whimpered, shaking his head. "He doesn't want his daughter's first thought to be 'attack them' either. That will make her a weaker slayer with problems distinguishing the right way from the wrong ways." He stood up, blocking the teacher. "No. We're going to finish this talk. This is my daughter and her life we're talking about. You can run back to hide but I can guarantee that Bucky and Darcy can help Maria Hill straighten out your students. Then the others."

"The one armed one from DC?" the principal demanded, standing up.

"My former teammate and best friend Bucky Barnes? Yeah," he said, staring at him. "HYDRA had him. He's better now. Back to himself at the very least and all fixed from the mind control they did." The principal whined. "I think they wanted to talk to the class today about bullying. It seems to be a problem they have." He stared at the teacher. "Also, she can't pass the grade-level test she would be taking in any other school. Aren't you supposed to be helping her be educated to the same level as other kids, even with her future?"

"She won't need it," he hissed.

Steve hit him, knocking him into a wall. "The best weapon is always a brain that works well and fast. Even if one's a slayer or an agent. I've thought my way out of things more often than I've shot my way out of them or punched my way out of them. Most agents have." He looked at the principal. The teacher ran off. He got hit again by Darcy, looking a lot like an accident. "I will not have my daughter pushed down and forced into a tiny little box that isn't for her.

"If you can't educate her the way she should be and help her learn the proper things, and I don't mean what she's been learning so far, then she and Larissa will find another school. As I said, I've talked to all her fellow students' parents. We had a charming coffee talk last night about things. Including that she couldn't pass that test and she's very bright and ahead on her homework.

"Real agents aren't like you're training them to be. Those ones don't pass because of their emotional problems and no one likes to work with them anyway." He walked off, going to the classroom. Darcy had just unleashed her twenty cupcakes, all legal by any allergies. He smiled at her. "That's real nice of you, Darcy."

"Thank you." She smiled and handed most kids one. She looked at one pouting kid. "I don't bake for bullies. Bullies never get anything good in life. Not jobs, not careers, not cookies, not cars, nothing." She gave out the rest, smiling at the one Suzette had told them about. "Hi, Alan, I'm Darcy Lewis. I work with Jane Foster and sometimes Thor. Suzette told us about you." The little boy smiled at her. She patted him on the head. "I let Suzette have a few of my fashion mags. That way you can find a short haircut that no one will mind. Even parents."

The little boy grinned. "Thank you, Miss Lewis."

"You're welcome, sweetie, and call me Darcy." She patted him again then headed back to the front of the room.

Bucky looked over them. "So, now you know what it was like in our days. Do you guys think that you're able to keep up with that?"

One girl raised her hand, sneering. "Future agents don't have to."

Maria Hill shook her head. "If SHIELD agents can't live up to what they could do back in the forties then they're not fit to be agents. There's no such thing as a dumb agent. Or an uneducated one. We can't send people like that into the field. Even if you're a savant in some fields, we can't use agents like that."

"The brain is your biggest weapon," Bucky agreed. "You use it to fit into various situations, to consider how best to do your job during the mission, how to handle the people you'll run into, how to handle the people in your everyday life, plus writing reports."

"But we don't need grammar!" that girl said.

"If your reports are that bad, you will get fired," Hill said simply. "There are standards. Including grammar standards. I don't need you able to diagram a sentence but you had better know how to properly write."

"Trajectories is math," Steve said. "So is most battle planning. Plus science." They all groaned. He smiled as he glanced at Maria. She nodded. He pulled up a report and let Darcy project it for him. "This was one of my last few missions, just an intel gathering thing. Who can tell me where I was?"

"The middle east," the girl said in a 'duh' voice.

"Nope. There's bad guys all over the world," Darcy said. "Just because the ones on the news are there doesn't mean that's where all the bad guys are. There's some in every single country in the world." The girl slumped down.

Larissa slowly raised her hand. "Is that somewhere that Russia used to control? My dad has a house in Serbia and I looked it up on a map once. I remember that country name being near there."

"You're right," Maria Hill said with a smile for her. "It is in a former Eastern Bloc country." She pulled up a map to show them where it was. "He was in this country." They all stared. "That's in Europe, yes."

"Just up the street from Latvia," Darcy quipped.

"Too true," Hill agreed. She banished that. "Who can tell me how you get there?"

"You fly in," one of the boys sneered.

"Hmm, yet the nearest airport is here," Steve said, calling back up the map. "Which is this far from that town." He adjusted the map to show that one. "How many miles is that?" They all stared. "There's a legend at the bottom of the map that tells you that." He pointed at it.

Alan, the one that Suzette was confused about, raised his hand. "That looks like just over two hundred miles, Mr. Rogers."

"It is," he agreed with a smile. "So how would I get there?"

"There's a main road." He got up, his seat loud in the room. He walked up and pointed. "It looks like you can take that main road most of the way but you'd have to go past it to get back to it by this road since only that one goes there."

"Very true," he agreed, smiling at him. "Reading a map is a lot of math and figuring out things like how much gas you're going to use." He hugged him, earning a smile. "Good job." He ran back to his seat. "What else would I need?"

"A map machine?" one guessed.

"That makes you look like a tourist and like you don't belong there," Hill said. "We prefer you write down the directions before you go. That's part of planning the mission usually." He nodded, making that note. "Also, maps like this can be wrong. Mapquest is famous for it. It actually tells you how to get to London from New York by driving across the Atlantic ocean." The kids all cracked up. "So you may need to stop and make sure you're going the right way with a good excuse."

"Which means you need to know at least a few words in the local language," Suzette said. The adults all nodded. "About how many?"

"Just enough to be polite usually," Maria said. "Please, thank you, is this...the name of the town. Where's the hotel/motel/rooming house/city hall. Those sort of phrases. A lot of agents tend to specialize in an area because they know the language better. Their families are from there." Steve and Bucky both said something in Gaelic. "In their case from Ireland." The kids all stared in awe. "My parents are from a few areas but one of my grandmothers taught me some German from the lower parts of Germany. My other side's grandfather came from Argentina by way of Brazil and before then Spain. So I learned a bit of that and picked up more in high school language classes. Which takes studying and brains."

"You also have to know how to dress to fit in," Darcy said. "Especially for women. Some places you have to wear special garments even if you're just visiting, like in the Middle East. Sometimes you can't wear anything that's too tight or showy. Sometimes you can go to Brazil and be in a bikini. Knowing people is a whole other science but it's considered a soft science. I was a political science major and yet I'm support staff now for the Avengers. Especially when they get injured or sick."

"So you're reminding us our brains are our most important weapons," one boy said.

Maria Hill smiled. "That's just one thing it's good for but yes, it is. You are here to learn how to be good adults. Not all of you will pass into agent training. Not all of you should want to pass into agent training."

"Those two categories? They're not exclusive," Bucky said. "A lot who want to be agents shouldn't be agents."

Maria nodded. "That is very true." She looked at the group. "For now, we want you to be children learning to be adults. You learn how to do math, geography, english, many other topics. Self defense I will allow to continue because it can save your life some day. We're all realistic about people who come for families of agents." A few nodded, looking down. "Especially when we're rebuilding and finding so many that should have been SHIELD and weren't." She looked around the room. "You are not the only group getting this lesson. We're just starting with you because we talked with your parents last night.

"I'm sorry to say that your teacher has made you behind your average student in this city. Which he was wrong to do. He was teaching you many things he should not have taught you until you were a teenager. If then." The kids nodded. "We are planning to offer some tutoring after school for those students who need help getting up to grade standard. It's hard but I'm sure all of you can do your best in here and learn all you can. Even if you're not agents that doesn't mean you're not worthwhile people. You can go on to great things that don't require an ID card and a badge."

"We're not India, kids. There's no castes that mean you're less worthwhile for one job over another," Darcy said. "No one in here is untouchable or higher status. If you're a garbage worker instead of an agent and that makes you happy then good for you. Being happy in your job will make your life so much more full. It'll mean a lot easier times and fewer health problems too. Less prosac needing people in the world is always a great thing."

"How do we find that out?" Alan asked.

"As you grow and you learn things, you find things that interest you," Maria said. "If that's geography, you'll use that to figure out what you want to do with your life. There's tests and things if you want to use them but most people figure it out after high school." He nodded.

"It's a super long road to being an adult for you guys. Take the long way," Darcy said. "It leads to playing, fun, happiness you'll miss when you're my age. People in their twenties can't just go play on a swingset or jump rope. We have jobs we have to do first." A few kids smiled. "Take the time to learn what you gotta learn, figure out what you *want* to learn, and take the time for fun things. You'll never get a chance to be this age again, unless chaos mages get hold of you."

"Don't remind me," Bucky sighed, shaking his head. "Six weeks of Buffy being ten with Willow." He rubbed his forehead with his metal hand.

One of the students popped up a hand. "You're the guy in that battle in DC."

"I was. I was brainwashed then. HYDRA had me." He shrugged. "I've healed and now I work with the Council." The kid looked at Larissa and Suzette. "I do work with more than them, yes. I took half of Xander's job from him." He smirked. "It means I get to escape all the girls going school shopping." Darcy burst out laughing, batting him on the arm. "Or prom shopping." She and Maria both smiled at him. "I have to keep reminding a few of the younger slayers-to-be that there's a difference between *playing* dumb and being dumb." They all nodded. The students stared in awe at them.

"Are you going to help us learn stuff?" Alan asked.

"I've got to help tutor all the other slayers, kiddo. If Steve needs my help he can ask."

"Can you spar with the slayers?" another girl asked.

"I can and have. I'm better than a lot of them. They're still taking lessons and learning."

"Real warriors learn every day," Steve said.

Bucky nodded. "They do. Even if they're watching Game of Thrones." A few kids laughed but Maria Hill shrugged.

"There's lessons to be learned from most tv shows," she said.

"I'd love to see the agents doing an American Ninja Warriors thing," Darcy said with a smile.

Maria looked at her. "Agents have to have *some* ego, Lewis. That would destroy them all. There's been peak fitness SEALs that couldn't pass that course."

Darcy smiled. "Exactly."

"Good point. It would definitely increase fitness."

"What?" Bucky and Steve asked. Darcy pulled out her phone to find a youtube video for them. They groaned at it.

"Exactly," Darcy said with a smile. "They could use it to make sure they're in peak fitness. If you make it through a stage you get a full week off, that most of them could use anyway."

Maria burst out laughing. "I might have to try that, Lewis. Thanks." She made that note for herself, looking at the kids. "Sometimes adults need incentive."

"I was thinking incentive might help the kids too," Darcy said. "How about if they start passing core subjects with a group high average I bring in something like the class approved cupcake recipe and we teach them how to make it or maybe something like a meal with that at the end."

Maria considered it then nodded. "Everyone needs to learn how to cook. Eating just takeout means you get weak and fat." The kids sat up straighter at that. "I can see that being a good incentive. Say class average of a B or above?"

Darcy nodded. "I can do that and they need to know nutrition anyway before they start to live on pop tarts like Jane tries to do."

Maria looked at her. "Thank you for fixing that."

"If I didn't, Thor would have to carry her around all the time." She smiled at the class. "Will that work for you guys? I know some of you guys aren't going to be the best at everything but you can help each other, without cheating, to get higher grades. If you guys get a class average of a B or better we give cooking lessons?" They mostly nodded. She smiled. "Great. Boss lady, which one first?"

"English should be easiest and they were closer on that part of the test," she said. "We'll test them in two weeks?" She looked at the staring principal.

"Make it three. There's a section on there for reading comprehension," he said quietly.

"Three is good," Darcy said. "I have to leave the next week to help Jane at a conference in Tampa."

"Then we can do that," Maria agreed. The kids cheered. "Study hard. We want to be able to say our agents' children are some of the smartest there are."

One girl raised her hand. "I didn't want to ask Larissa or Suzette, but can slayers have normal jobs? My mom said they can't."

"Yeah, they can," Bucky said. "Half the girls only patrol for a year or during college and go to battles-only status once they graduate. We have three or four in the city that are doing normal, everyone can do them, jobs. We want the girls to be as normal as possible. They're allowed to date, though we do tend to watch over them just in case they're not great and the sort that want to capture a slayer. A great many have kids and are married. Most of them have good jobs and we do pay for college for those girls that want it."

"So they're training to go on patrol for a few years?"

"Battles," Steve said. "Can happen at any time or anywhere. From what I've seen, most of the slayers don't stay on nightly patrol status after twenty-five but they're all on call for battles in their areas, and for the really bad ones if they can get there and they're cleared or nearly cleared they can jump in." She nodded.

"At the battle in Suriname last month, one of the slayers was complaining she should be sitting with her daughter while she pushed out her first grandchild," Bucky said.

"Slayers are just like everyone else but they have a duty if a bad demon event is happening," Steve agreed. "Some girls are never fit for patrol status. They don't have the right responses or they can't do it physically due to injuries or birth defects. They're still slayers. They do support things instead usually."

The kids looked at Suzette and Larissa. "I'd like to do what Mr. Sam does," Larissa said. "By the time I'm old enough for college he'll be old enough to retire."

"It's something all the girls need," Bucky agreed, smiling at her. "It's a lot of college but you're good at listening and that seems to be the best thing." Steve nodded, smiling at her. "Not everyone knows what they want to do this young but sometimes you do."

Suzette raised her hand. "Does that mean Daddy and I can run in the charity run in a few weeks?"

"Grounded," Darcy reminded her.

"For charity I'd let her, and help, but it'd be unfair of me to run with my gifts," he said. She pouted. "You can ask Uncle Clint or someone if they'd like to run with you in it. Some people run those to qualify for later marathons and I'd screw up their scores, Suzette."

"You can't do it not for scores?"

"I don't know. I'll see. Still, ask one of your uncles or aunts."

"Auntie Darcy?" she asked, eyes wide.

Darcy giggled, shaking her head. "Sweetheart, I can't run. I really can't. I do something like a twenty minute mile. Sorry, dear. Ask Clint, he can run. Or Tony. He can run, he does at least once a week."

"I can do that," she decided.

"You can workout with me," Steve offered with a smile.

"Bite your tongue, Rogers."

"Fine." He looked at Bucky.

"Sword practice is so much worse than boxing and sparring practice," Bucky defended. "Especially if I'm using an axe against Xander or practicing against magic with Andrew."

Steve shook his head but he was smiling. "There's many ways of finding physical fitness, kids. Bucky knows a lot more about that than I do."

"Will you run with me, Uncle Bucky?" Suzette asked with a smile.

He stared at her. "I'm a bit enhanced myself."

"But you're not super speedy," she quipped.

"Uh-huh. Ask me tomorrow." She pouted but nodded. He looked at Darcy.

"It's a charity 10K for the local Veteran's home and prostheses programs." He groaned but nodded. Steve sighed but nodded he'd go too. She patted them both on the back. "Jane and I can man some drink stations, guys." Suzette got up to dance happily. Larissa joined her. "Larissa, do you want to join?"

"No thank you. My mom wouldn't like that."

"I can talk her into it," Suzette said happily, hugging her. "We can go together. Maybe on our bikes?" She looked at her father. Who shrugged. She grinned. Larissa squealed and hugged her back then ran up to hug them all before going back to her seat.

Maria Hill smiled. "It's good when you kids are happy. Keep being happy and we'll be watching." They nodded and she went to talk to the other classes with Steve and Bucky.

***
Part 2 by Voracity2
Tony looked up as his lab was breached by two cute little girls. "Aren't you grounded, Suzette?"

"My mom's off yelling at my real dad," Larissa said with a shrug. "We wanted to ask you something, Mr. Tony. Please?" she begged. She did her best begging look, which Suzette was mirroring.

Tony groaned but sat down. "What's up? I can't help you prank anyone. Pepper will be mad."

Suzette took his arm to hug and Larissa got the other side. "There's a charity 10K run next weekend and we need adults to go with us. We're going to ride our bikes but it's *important*," Suzette said, staring up at him.

"I don't think I can do that. I can donate. I know there's sponsor stuff for a few bucks each mile you go," he offered, staring at them.

"You could ride on one of those scooter thingies that they give the veterans with amputations," Larissa said, bouncing some. "Please, Mr. Tony? It's for the veterans home and for them to get replacement arms and stuff that need it. We're going to ride our bikes and we need adults to go with us in case something happens."

"They give vets gyroscopic scooters?" he asked them. Steve walked in nodding. "Why?"

"For ease of movement so they're not confined to a wheelchair. There's a tour group in DC that uses them too."

"I can gladly donate."

"But they need to know more than money," Suzette said. "It'll make them feel better to know that guys like you are behind them. That you appreciate them like you do Mr. Rhodey."

"You can ride a bike with us if you need to, Larissa said with a smile. "Or get a robot to help you run it."

He groaned, looking at Steve. "I got talked into it too," Steve admitted. "It would look good for a few members of the team to be there. The average soldier needs to know the exceptional ones are behind them too. It boosts morale."

"I can't.... 10K?" he demanded.

"They're running a 5K at the same time, Stark."

"I..." The girls both stared up at him, pleading. He got free and walked off. "Let me think tonight."

"Then you'll talk yourself out of it," Larissa said, following him to the back work area. "If you do that then all they'll get is a donation and money's a cheap gift. It makes you feel bad. If you go they'll know you want them to get back to normal and maybe they'll try to ask you about how to make better fake hands and legs and stuff. I'm sure you could do a lot with it. Some of them still look like pirate hooks. Though I wasn't supposed to watch that movie; my mother would be mad if you tell her. Please don't?"

"I won't tell your mom you're watching pirate movies," he sighed, staring at her. The other begging one was staring at him from Dum-E's grasp. "Dum-E, let her go." The robot let her go and she ran over to hug him and give him begging looks. He sighed. "Fine, I'll do the 5K." They cheered and bounced into him for hugs then ran off to find the others. Suzette said not to bother Bruce but otherwise they hit all the other Avengers. He looked at Steve. "You're teaching her to be manipulative."

"She gets it from her mother."

***

The girls ran into the gym and each one picked a target. Larissa got Clint, Suzette getting Natasha to pounce. They both caught the girls to stare at them.

"There's a charity 10K run next weekend," Suzette said, staring at her auntie. "They'll feel good that we're going to help. Will you come run with us? We're riding our bikes."

"Aren't you grounded?" Clint asked her. Larissa wiggled her way onto his back and was hugging his neck.

"Well, yeah, but Daddy said we could ride together in it because it's for the veteran's house and to help them get the fake hands and stuff they need. It's really important that they know we're behind them," Suzette said. She looked at him then at Natasha. "Please?"

"Please?" Larissa begged in Clint's ear.

He looked back at her. "Yeah, I guess I can do that if I'm not on a mission," he sighed. She squealed and squeezed his neck, giving him a hug. "Who else is going?" he asked as he pried her off him.

"Uncle Tony said he'd do the 5K part," Suzette said. She stared at Natasha. "Please?"

She huffed. "I am not prepared to run a 10K, girls."

"You can run the shorter 5K, I think that's shorter," Larissa said, smiling up at her. "Soldiers and veterans would like pretty girls sticking up for them, especially if they're tough girls who could fight beside them. Soldiers like girls like that. The movies say so," she said, scowling at Clint when he laughed. "They do," she said with a foot stomp.

"They do. Soldiers love it when girls can fight beside them," he agreed with a grin for her. "Especially really talented ones like Natasha."

She looked at him. "I will finish this sparring match later," she said in Russian.

"Great, can we watch?" Suzette said back in Russian, smiling at her. "We need to know how to do it at the bigger girl levels and we can talk about the running thing while you two spar."

Natasha stared at her. "I forget you speak Russian." Suzette beamed at her. She sighed. "I will run the 5K, girls." They squealed and hugged her too, then sat down to watch them spar. Clint smirked at her. He knew she was going to make him pay for that but it would be fun to do.

***

That night at dinner, Suzette looked at her last uncle. "Uncle Thor?" He put down his fork to stare at her. "Will you come do the charity run with us next weekend? Larissa and I are going to ride our bikes during it but a lot of the others are coming and it'd be great for the people to know that you guys supported the veterans and them getting replacement hands and stuff."

Thor looked at Jane, who explained what it was. "Girls, why him?" she asked.

"Because I'm sure he can run 10K," Larissa said with a smile. "He's really strong and really tough so of course he can run that far. Just like Mr. Steve can."

"They've talked me into the 5K with Romanoff, and Barton's doing the 10K with them and Steve," Tony said then stuffed his mouth.

"I figured you and me could do a drink station," Darcy said with a smile for her.

"We're going to Tampa."

"That's in four weeks, Jane."

"Oh." She nodded, considering it. "I can help hand out water and stuff, yeah." She looked at Thor. "That means jogging for 10 kilometers. Or 5 kilometers if you do the shorter version."

"It's in the park," Darcy said, pulling up the information on it. "So it should be safe enough. It's for the local veterans home and for a charity that helps people get prosthetic parts."

Thor read it over, nodding. "I can see me doing the shorter distance." He looked at Jane, who smiled at him. "I may try the larger one but I may not make it. I do not tend to run like most Midgardians do."

"That's okay, even a tiny bit will help," Larissa said, eyes wide. He smiled and patted her on the head. "Thank you, Mr. Thor. Can I have more chicken please?" They let her take some and gave Thor some more too. They talked about how you dressed for something like that and if the girls' bikes needed to be checked first. They could do that and Darcy would send in the registration the next morning before anyone changed their minds.

***

Before the run, Suzette ran into a reporter. She knew her father had told them about her. Her father was somewhere else talking to the guy who gave out numbers. She smiled at the reporter, who looked confused. "Of course I'm here today. Soldiers need to know that we're behind them and that we support them getting better."

"That's very true," the reporter said with a smile. "Are you running?"

"Larissa and I are riding our bikes with the extended group. My dad's running with us." She pointed at him then bounded off to hug Larissa and her classmates that were riding with them.

"Oh, that's Suzette Rogers!" she said, realizing it when Steve walked over. She hurried over. "Captain?" He looked up and smiled slightly. "You're doing the 10K?"

"Suzette and Larissa mentioned it and that they wanted to support this charity by being here. They've got sponsorship from some of the people at Stark Industries and talked most of us into being here."

"That's sweet of her." She smiled. "Your classmates, girls?" They smiled and nodded. "I hope you all make it to the finish lines, kids. Good luck and have a pretty ride today." She smiled at the father. "She's a good girl."

"Most of the time. She's presently grounded but it's important." He smiled as he walked off. Her camera man caught sight of most of the other Avengers warming up to jog. They caught sight of that guy that had been in DC and was now Council. He was helping the class. They caught sight of Dr. Foster kissing Thor and then going to help carry drinks to a station up the way with another young woman. This was a huge bit of gossip news. She was so happy she had caught it first! She even caught Pepper giving Tony a last minute pep talk before going to help hand out water with the other two women that were with the team. Though they had no idea who the brunette was. Yet.

Her supervising editor would squeal in delight with all this.

***

Steve bent down to catch his breath at the end, looking at the two tired girls. "We need a milk shake after we clean up." The girls cheered. Most of their classmates had given up at the 5K mark but a few had stayed with them. Their parents came rushing over to gather them and their participation certificate. "We should get treats for that," he told them.

"Yes we should," one agreed, smiling at her daughter. "You deserve cookies."

"I love cookies." She hugged the others and they walked off, her mother pushing her bike for her.

"Anyone coming with us?" Larissa asked. Only one kid shrugged, he was still looking around for his parents. The others promised to see them in class Monday. That one was pouting. Larissa hugged him. "We can find your parents."

"They're probably reading in the car." He took his certificate with a smile. So did Larissa and Suzette. "Mr. Rogers?"

"We can stay until they pick you up, Bryan." He smiled and nodded. They moved out of the way to cool down and meet up with the rest of the team.

Natasha waved them over. "Stark sprained his ankle so Pepper's babying him."

"That happens," Steve said. He sat down, wiping off his forehead with the tail of his shirt. Darcy bounded over to hug the kids and talk to them. Jane was following more slowly but she had met up with Thor so they were talking about it. People were clearing out. Steve let Bryan call his parents with his phone. No answer. One of the watching officers sent out an announcement for his parents to find him. Still no answer. The officer took him to look for their car and there they were.

"Mom, I do not need a sibling!" he called loudly. The car had a 'thump' and then she scurried out of the car to hug him. "My bike's back with Mr. Rogers."

"I can go get it, dear." She smiled at the officer. "Thank you," she mouthed. "Sorry." He nodded and walked off. She walked her son off. "So you did good?"

"I did okay. I came in just over a hundred."

"That's great." She smiled. "You know, I'm not going to give you a sibling."

"Are you sure? You doing stuff to make one and Larissa said hers are kind of annoying at times. They have messy, stinky diapers and they're greedy attention hogs."

"Yes, all kids are, that's why I only have you, dear." He smiled at her. "Oh, that Mr. Rogers," she said, straightening out her hair. "Sorry, Captain. My husband's just back from a mission," she said quietly, blushing some.

"I've done some of that myself," he said with a smile. "He did good. He was right behind the girls for the most part. This is his." He handed over the certificate with the picture. "I think his back tire's going flat though."

"That's expected after that long of a ride. Thank you for watching over him for me."

"Not a problem. He's a good boy." He smiled at the kid. "Have fun."

"You too." He walked his bike off. "Mom, they're getting milkshakes. Can we?"

"We're having sundaes at home," she said. He cheered and danced a bit but leaned against her.

Steve stood up, stretching up. "Larissa, where's your mom?"

"No clue," she admitted, trying to call her again. "No answer. Or my dad," she said after trying him. She huffed. "Damn it." Steve scowled. "Sorry but she should answer!"

"She should. You may come have milkshakes with us," Natasha said. "Are we having them out or at the tower?"

"Up to everyone," Clint said from where he was resting. He and Natasha had raced and he had barely won so she got the worst part of their next mission. He smiled. Having longer legs was good for something.

"Stark said that we have milkshakes waiting. Pepper made them," Darcy said, putting up her phone. "Larissa, I left a message for your mom to pick you up at the tower." She nodded and they walked toward the minivan they were using today. The bikes went into the back. The girls got the backseat with Natasha and Steve got in to drive with Bucky beside him. Clint, Thor with Jane on his lap, and Darcy squeezing in next to the door got the center row.

***

Larissa woke up on the couch when someone touched her head. She blinked at Natasha. "Is my mom here?"

"She was in the ER with your youngest brother."

"Oh. Him again."

She stared at her. "It is not his fault he is ill."

"No, it's his fault he's an attention hog."

"Babies need more attention and you could help her with them."

"Nope. I didn't make the baby, I'm not helping with the baby. I told her that with the last one. I'm never having more than one kid."

"Saying that means you'll have twins," Clint quipped from the kitchen.

"At least they can amuse each other then. Like kitties do." She sat up. "Is she coming to pick me up?"

"In a few hours. They're still seeing what's wrong with him."

"He hates his formula. It makes his stomach explode," she said. "Mom doesn't seem to get this but each time she feeds him he pukes." She sighed and found her phone to text her mother that. She huffed and sent back that Suzette was supposed to be grounded so she couldn't really sleep over. She heard a phone ring up the hall and winced. "She shouldn't wake people up."

"It's only ten. Steve's not asleep yet," Clint said, coming out with some coffee for him and water for Larissa. She smiled and took it to drink.

Steve came out, nodding at her. "You can nap on our couch, Larissa. Your mom will pick you up in the morning."

"Sure. Thanks, Mr. Steve." She followed him, going to take another shower and borrow some of Suzette's jammies for now. Maybe she'd call Mr. Sam to talk to him about her mom. He understood about those things. He helped slayers all the time. She could tell Uncle Xander but then he'd talk to her mom and make her cry. She didn't want that.

***

Suzette watched her best friend stomp off crying and followed her. "Hey, what's wrong?" she asked, giving her a hug.

Larissa sniffled. "My mommy thought my eyes were green!" she shouted.

"They're blue," Suzette said, staring at them to make sure. "Right now they're kinda red but they're mostly blue." She cuddled her. "Maybe she's possessed. We should try an exorcism. We got taught one at summer camp." Larissa smiled, staring at her through her tears. "We can do that. We tie the bestest knots of any mini slayer." Larissa nodded and they ran to get some rope and make some holy water then went to tie up her mother and try the exorcism.

"What are you doing?" Steve demanded when he came in.

"She didn't know what her daughter's eye color was, so she's gotta be possessed, Daddy," Suzette said. "We're helping get it out."

"Uh-huh," he said, nodding slowly. "Sure. I get that. Maybe she's just really tired. She's been up all night."

"You'd never forget your daughter's eye color," Larissa said with a pout. "It has to be a possession."

"Yeah, it's gotta be," Steve agreed, hugging her. "Why don't you two go call Xander. He's got a book full of them and I'm sure he can find the right one. Then go ask Darcy *nicely* to make you two some toast and eggs? I'm out." They ran to do that. He looked at her. "She's had that complaint a lot," he said quietly. "And I have no right to step in the middle." Xander appeared with a sigh. "I'm sure you talked to her?"

"Yeah, and over the last few days. Andrew said she's a bit depressed too." Steve nodded, leaving to let him handle it. He stared at her. "You've stretched yourself too thin." She started to cry. "It's obviously a problem so let's figure out how you're going to fix it so I can untie you once you're 'cured'. Okay?" She nodded. One of the kids started to wail for food. Xander called Andrew to send him something. That worked and the kid slurped it like he had never eaten before.

"He's got a milk allergy."

"That's pounded rice and corn grains with goats milk. It's not bothering him and a lot of kids with milk allergies can still drink goats milk." She slumped, staring at him. He stared back. He took the bottle and burped the baby, and no wailing. He let him have it back and he finished it while fussing for more. Another burping and he drifted off content. The other one got some cereal Andrew brought up to help him eat. "Thanks, 'Drew."

"Welcome. I used to need special milk too. I think I was born with an ulcer." Xander ruffled his hair, earning a swat. "Behave." He fed the older little one, making him happy. Then he went to help cheer up Larissa and Suzette. Xander helped a lot of the parents do better with the mini slayers. He was good at it.

***

"We don't need no education," the girls sang together.

"Yes you do, you just used a double negative," Darcy called.

"It's a song, silly," Larissa said, giving her a hug. "Mr. Tony's computer was signing it." The girls bounded off together to hang out with Andrew.

Darcy shook her head. "Great, the girls like Pink Floyd. We'll have to get them some music for the holidays." Darcy went back to figuring out recipes that wouldn't get her complained at by parents. One had complained she had used real butter in a recipe. When Darcy had pointed out it was an all natural product and better for the children, the mother huffed about it being an animal by-product and they didn't eat those. So Darcy had quipped she could substitute all the chemicals in margarine or shortening if she wanted but it wouldn't taste as good.

She decided on a nice veggie dish and a fruit cobbler with oat topping. No flour needed for that so the one kid would be safe and no eggs needed so the other would be okay. She baked something to test out that new potato-based thickener that had come out but didn't like it as much. She looked online to find out if cornstarch was gluten free and it turned out a few brands were so she ran out to get some of that and make sure the recipes were good.

If Stark would eat it, kids would eat it.

She brought down a plate, making him smile at her. "Am I your test subject again?"

"Yup. For the kids."

He took the plate to eat, humming in pleasure at the cobbler he ate first. Then he ate the vegetable dish. He wiggled his head back and forth while chewing. "Bit solid still and kind of bland."

"I'd generally use a spicy cheese mix but we have one kid whose mother hates animal by-products."

Stark shook his head and ate the rest. "Figures. Spices?"

"Six different ones. Including some cayenne."

"You can't taste that. Must've cooked out instead of cooking in." He finished and handed back the plate. "Thanks, Lewis."

"Welcome and thank you back, Stark." She went up there to tweak the recipe. Steve was eating the rest. "Cheese in the ice box."

"I added some," he said then smiled and ate another bite. "Usually you use some spicy cheese."

"One of the kids can't have animal by-products."

"That's an allergy?"

"No, that's his mother being like that."

"Oh." He ate another bite but nodded. "Make it both ways with a tiny bit saved out for him without cheese."

"Yeah, I can do that." She made a real one for dinner and more of the cobbler. "No wheat products at all."

"Wonderful. The kids will love that." He grinned at her busy hands. "Jane busy?"

"Jane's on Thor somewhere in the city."

He laughed, but nodded. "They're cute."

"They're very cute." She saw Cordelia fading in looking like she had gotten into a brawl with a group of fists. Her clothes were torn, her hair was messed up, she looked like she had been crying. "That huge of an issue?" she asked. "Should we call Xander? Xander!"

He appeared, staring at Cordelia and frowning. "What happened? They get overthrown?"

"They had a fight," she said, staring at him. "Not because of your ex, but some of the ones they bet with decided you were cheating."

"Because of the wish?"

"No, having you around was cheating."

He stared at her then smiled. "They're going to try to kill me?"

"Yeah, you really shouldn't be anywhere you can be found."

"Who?" She leaned over to hiss in her ear. He snapped and did the charm to take him to his storage area. He handed her something with an evil smirk. Then he winked and took it back, going up there. He threw it at the usurping ones. They screamed as it ate them. "Howdy," he said with a smile. "You guys made me this way. You should be proud." He stared at the Powers, who were gaping. "The shit you find when you fall into the holes they're shoved in," he quipped. He stared at the usurpers, smirking evilly. "Hi." One screamed as she came at him with a knife. He fought her off and got a few cuts but then she died by her own knife. "Next?" They attacked and he did his best. They went down. He was critically injured but the others were freed. His ex stepped in to prove she was a warrior and the daughter of warriors. They died and Xander was nearly there. He was gasping for breath.

She took his arm. "Thank you, Cordelia, for making that daring rescue move," she said. She took Xander with her. "Not only were you injured on a non-physical plane but you're nearly out of time, sweetheart. That's not good." Steve was calling their med team to come up. Darcy took him from her. "Good. Thank you. He'll last long enough for a surgeon to get to him."

"Thank you, Goddess Inana."

"Welcome, Darcy." She smiled. "I can see why they compared us." She disappeared as the med team got there.

"He was off fighting with a higher being," Darcy said firmly. "Probably stabbed instead of shot by the cuts." They nodded, putting pressure on the most immediate need. "His breath is whistling too," she said, letting Steve pull her out of the way. They rushed him off. "Oh, god," she muttered. She looked up at Steve.

"I'm calling Bucky. You're not telling Suzette until he's out of surgery. That way she can't worry but it'll give her time to fuss. Or if she comes home with Larissa tonight they can fuss. Call Andrew." She nodded, diving for her phone to do that while he made the hard call. He listened to the ring and it was answered on the third one. "Xander got pulled to help fight for the Powers That Be," he said quietly. "Inana brought him back pretty badly off. He's in our med unit at the tower. Yeah, you need to be here, Bucky." He hung up and followed with Darcy and as it turned out Clint. "Hey."

"I'm glad we don't have a battle soon," he said, rubbing the back of his neck. Steve looked at him. "They'd take the opportunity of us being gone to try for him, Steve."

"Point. I just called Bucky. Darcy got Andrew."

"That's good." They walked in. "Good news?" he called.

"No," one of the doctors called back and shoved Andrew out. "If that's all true, he's probably belonging on the team."

"It is," Andrew said.

Bucky appeared, stomping in there. He took the file from Andrew to add to the one he had. "This is what's in his blood, it's highly confidential because it will get him hunted. And yes, the med report is right."

They stared at it then at him. "How!" one of the doctors demanded.

"He's like that. Just fix the stabs?"

"We are," another doctor said, not looking at him. "Should we route him to any specific hospital once he's out of surgery?"

"No," Stark said as he walked in. "He's staying here so we don't have to go there to guard him from blood hunters." He took the reports to look at. "Nothing since I ran it. Great." He led Bucky out of the room. "Just fix him. The slayers will beat us all to death if he dies." They nodded and got to work on the most serious things while the surgical suite was readied. When it was, they rolled him in there to start the tedious stitching project.

Andrew plopped himself down and stared in there until they came out to tell them something.

Darcy gave him a hug. "Surgery's nasty, Andrew," she said in his ear. "Come upstairs to wait so you can tell Giles or whoever."

"I yelled it." He looked at her. "I need to be here."

"He'll be *fine*. Stark hires the best. That's why he got Jane and me." She nodded. He sighed but nodded. "Good. Come help me warp recipes for Suzette's class. One kid can't have eggs, another wheat, and one's no animal by-products by order of his mom."

He snorted. "I hate them." He stood up and walked off with her, letting her hug him until he calmed down. He made them something to drink, that had some rum in it, and got to work on some of the slayer recipes. They had one with gluten intolerance so he had to warp some of them already. It kept him busy and his hands from twitching.

Bucky turned to watch them go then looked at Steve. "What happened?"

"Cordelia showed up looking like she had been mugged by a group of fists," Steve said. "Clothes torn and all." Bucky winced. "She said something about a group the Powers bet with hating Xander existed. He got called and took her then Inana brought him back like that. I'm guessing they got mad."

"Probably. Xander can piss you off faster than anyone on earth at times. Usually on purpose so you go away." He sighed, looking around Steve at the man appearing. "Whistler."

"The ones they bet with thought having Xander was an unfair advantage so they were going to remove him," he said. "He showed up with a god eater demon. Said he found it in a hole they had stored it in." Bucky smirked at that. "You knew that?"

"Did he take him or her?"

"Him," he sighed. "I don't need to know." He stared at him. "They attacked him."

"Figures. Who won and can I come help?" Bucky asked.

"Injuries on a non-physical plane may not heal like others," Whistler said. Stark moved closer to him and he suddenly realized he was around some very angry people who were just as bad as Xander was. "It may because it's him. The first cut may not and she may have lined the blade with poison."

"We can watch for that," Bucky said. "Can I come beat them?"

"No. They're dead now. The Powers are complaining that those ones forfeited. They didn't really want their realm to lord over as well. Too much work." He sighed. "We're all pulling for Xander. Summers will rip my ribcage out to wear me as a hat."

"Dawn? Yes, she will," Bucky assured him. "How do we fix the poisoning?"

"We have no clue."

"Get me the knife," Stark ordered coolly. "I can find a way." It appeared and Stark snatched it, walking off to test the blade. The others were waiting on him. Two poisons and one they knew how to counter. The other...no one had any clue.

Whistler looked at Bucky. "Looks like you're in charge for now. The others are clueless at times that Xander does a lot of the real work."

"I knew that. I can handle it."

"Good." He disappeared. "Too bad he wasn't turned, then slayer blood would've cured him," he said once he was gone.

"Yeah but he's not a vampire and he'd hate that," Bucky said bluntly. "He'd stake himself." He looked in there. Then he held up a hand and went to Xander's storage area. "Anything healing in here?"

"Mohra demon gem," he said with a point at the box. "Two holy things I cannot touch. Neither can you. Only the pure."

"Anything like an anti-poison?"

"Mohra gem would," Cordelia said, appearing next to him. Her clothes had been repaired and the bruises were healing. "You can filter his blood over the stone and it should help but there's no telling what it'd do against the mermaid taint or anything else." She looked around. "The other two are too holy to use on Xander. They're for people like monks."

Bucky grimaced. "Anything that would work?"

"Mythical healing elixir that no one on this plane makes?"

He stared at her. "Uh-huh. Can you get me to that special...." The imp squealed and ran off to get something, bringing it back. "That's a stone."

"That's a philosopher's stone. How.... Never mind. It's Xander. He probably farted it out one night after too many pizzas." She disappeared but a book came flying off to hit him. He caught it, looking at it.

"Thank you. Anything made off this?" The imp shook his head, looking down. "What did this come from?"

"Special bag."

"Get me that bag and the other healing things." The imp got them for him, putting them into a box. "Thank you." He disappeared. He walked into Stark's lab, putting the book down next to him and the stone more carefully. "Philosopher's stone?"

"Holy fuck," Bruce said, staring at it then at him. "Where?"

"Xander. Somehow. There's a healing elixir off it." He put down the other two. "Two holy objects that heal and one mohra gem stone. You can filter blood over it but no one's sure what'll happen against the mermaid taint."

Stark blinked a few times. "Yeah, I want to look at his storage area."

"There's an imp that runs it."

"Take me?"

Cordelia appeared, shaking her head. "If Xander dies, the imp'll take everything in there. You don't want to be in hell, right?" She looked at Bucky.

Bucky summoned the imp and picked it up by the neck, staring at him. "Swear your loyalty to Xander's heirs as you do him," he ordered in a growl. The imp was shaking. "All his heirs. Before I send you home and get a different imp to do your job."

"I swear," he moaned. "I don't want to go back."

"Good. Xander's heirs are myself, Kate, Dawn, and Andrew." The imp nodded and disappeared, going back there to make sure he wouldn't get recalled. Bucky smirked a tiny bit. "Interesting book on the uses of imps in history." He went back to the infirmary.

Cordelia pointed. "Too holy for anyone, including any of you, to touch. That one too. Mohra demon gem stone." She looked at them and shrugged. "Mermaid taint will burn."

"We'll figure it out. Know anything about those poisons?" he asked with a point.

"Ask Andrew. That's more his area. Or Dawn." She smiled and disappeared.

He looked up. "JARVIS, I need Dawn Summers immediately on the phone or in person."

She appeared, blinking at him. "You beeped a 911?" she demanded. He pulled her closer to tell her what had happened and show her the poisons. "I can help with a healing spell. I can feel Andrew and Darcy. That'll work." She got free. "Thanks, Stark." She stomped off, going up to the kitchen. Andrew gaped, staring at her. "C'mon. We can help." He nodded, dusting off his hands and following her. She was much more sure in the magical stuff than he was. They needed a third for balance but wouldn't think about anyone in the Devon Coven or the other covens they worked with. They all really thought Xander had too much control over the girls because he went a bit too far in the big brother act.

Kate Bishop stomped in and nodded, holding out a hand. "Take mine, Dawn."

"You don't do magic."

"So?" She stared at her. "I can be a battery."

"We need a third magic user."

"Ask Thor." Andrew smiled at her and hugged her. They got Thor to come back with Jane, who went to comfort Darcy. Thor came in to help them with the healing spell. He wasn't great at them but he had helped his mother a few times, as had Loki. It was something that he had inherited without actually using. He settled with them and Kate helping them. The healing spell was well crafted and went to Xander with their help. It helped all the injuries but one of the poisons remained.

Thor walked outside and came back with a healer a few minutes later. "Thank thee," he said quietly.

"We have heard much of the slayers, Thor, and this one guides them to a better path of a healthier warrior," the old man said. He walked in there. "Let me see the infected tissues." He moved to read them and nodded, writing down the cure. "This is what you use."

"We don't know what half of that is," the surgeon said. "Would someone like Andrew Wells? He's in the next room. He's a magic user."

"I know not." He walked out. "Thor, help me translate." He went to find Andrew, nodding at him. "We need this, young magic user."

He looked at it, writing the notes on the various formulas. "I don't have that," he said. "Or that one. That's almost mythical."

"Stark had a philosopher's stone on his table," Dawn said. The healer smiled and went to get it while she and Andrew got the healing potions they had made. That left one ingredient. The tears of a true Mother. They stared at them. She looked at the healer when he came back. "What type of mother? One who's had a child or just any mother?"

"A true mother doesn't necessarily have to have children," Thor said, frowning some. "JARVIS, send Darcy down." She came in a few minutes later. "We need the tears of a true mother."

"I'm not one, Thor. I've never had a child."

"You are a true mother to both young warriors." She sniffled and nodded. "It must be about the injured one though."

"About his injuries, that is what must make you cry," the healer agreed after checking her. She looked in there and started to sniffle and cry. They gathered them for the mixing and the healer taught it to them. Then he went in to pour it on the affected area. Some went down Xander's throat. He seized once then settled down with a groan of pain. He helped the surgeons clean up the mess, nodding at their work. "You stitch more neatly than my daughter. That's a fine thing," he assured them. He directed healing energy into the boy's body. The mermaid taint irked him some but he could work around it.

Xander would live.

Even when the two mini slayers ran in and tried to help by climbing up to check on him. The surgeons stopped them but Suzette kicked one and cried on him. Both girls gave energy out that he gathered to heal with. They fell asleep so he let the father and mother take them. He finished up and the surgeons relaxed, nodding. "That works well," the healer decided. "He will heal and be just as stubborn." He smiled at the surgeons. "You do well at your limited levels. Do none of you do energy healing?" They shook their heads, taking him to rest, get some coffee or tea, and talk to him about that idea.

The others settled in to watch Xander sleep. The girls got put onto a couch so they could nap off the strain. JARVIS was watching them.

***

Willow showed up, scowling at Andrew. "Why are you up here? Are you bothering these people talking about stupid comic book stuff?"

"First, stupid comic book stuff gives us ideas of what we might have to prepare for, so yeah, we're pumping him for it," Stark said, sitting up. "Second, you'd think you'd care that your *supposed* best friend nearly died earlier." She gasped, shaking her head.

"Someone attacked the Powers over Xander so Cordelia came to get him," Andrew said quietly. "He brought up stuff to solve it but they had to heal a few poisons and a lot of cuts. Thankfully Stark's a genius who hires other geniuses and Thor was here to get a healer from Asgard to help with the stuff we couldn't heal with the healing spell and surgery." She gaped. "Yeah, me, magic, Willow. Without having to take over the world yet."

"But..."

"Just....go," Andrew said quietly but firmly. "We don't need it right now. We're all exhausted. Just...go home. Please? The girls can eat takeout tonight if no one else cooks."

Bucky came out of the elevator, staring at her. Willow backed away slowly. "They had to stitch ten stab wounds, Rosenburg. Leave Andrew and everyone alone. They did a healing spell to help earlier then worked with the Asgardian healer." She slumped but nodded and disappeared. He looked at Andrew. "You need a vacation."

"I know. But if Xander's not there, no one else can handle the girls."

"Am I chopped meat?" he asked.

"You can't cook."

"The girls can cook. You taught most of them. Maybe they should prove it once a week." Andrew stared, mouth open. "Yeah. That way they know how to handle things better. Steve and I could when we were orphaned."

Andrew swallowed. "I might like that. Can you go talk to them before Willow has a hissy?"

"Done," Dawn said, calling down there on her phone. Stark snatched it and put it onto the main screen. She waved at the girls staring at the screen. "Xander's out of surgery. Andrew and I are fragged from the healing spell. Some of you know how to cook thanks to Andrew so can you guys handle it tonight and maybe for breakfast?"

"Of course!" one of the girls said. "What happened to Xander! Buffy! Faith! It's Dawn!"

"The Powers got jumped by their competitors," Dawn said. The girls all groaned. "They thought the Powers having Xander on this realm was cheating." A few sneered. "So Xander got brought up to help. They got into a physical brawl. Thankfully we could do a healing spell and Lord Thor got a healer from Asgard to help with what we couldn't and the surgeons were going to be fighting with. He'll be fine."

"They're keeping him asleep for a few days," Bucky said. "That way they can make sure the stuff in his blood won't do funny things like change colors or anything." They all nodded, the two senior ones staring. "He'll be fine, ladies, but we're making Andrew and Dawn rest for the night. I suggested some of you learned how to cook and could do something?" They nodded as a group. "Good girls. Thank you for easing the stress right now."

"Why?" Buffy asked.

"The Powers and their betting partners thought Xander was *cheating*," Cordelia said as she appeared. "They bet the other guys that they couldn't take out Xander to provoke them into invading and trying to take him out. Xander took them out with a god eating demon while they fought with knives." Buffy shuddered. "He'll be fine. Thor's exceptional and those of us who do the real work are going to be rewarding him somehow. Including making Xander do an inventory. Or making him turn over the philosopher's stone he got somewhere into Stark's safe keeping."

"It's in my safe and no one can get to it," Stark said.

She smiled at him. "Let Thor."

"Sure," he said, staring at her. She glanced toward Jane and Darcy. He gaped. She smirked. "It's a reward we can offer. Also, have fun going through the bag. Think about emptying it *gently* and don't rip the bag or it all disappears." She looked at the girls. "You're safe because of it." They nodded.

"Xander always makes sure we're safe if he can," one said quietly. "Will he have to retire?"

"No, just rest a lot for at least a month," Cordelia said.

"I was going to start on his rounds of checking minis soon anyway," Bucky said. "We were going to split it."

"The girls like it when you two show up together," Faith said. "Some of the minis have serious crushes on Xander. You sure he'll be good?" she demanded, staring at the camera.

"Yeah, he'll be good," Cordelia said. "That'll also bypass the demands that the Powers wanted him to mate with people who weren't flirting with him."

"What about that chaos mage?" Bucky asked.

"They're friends," Cordelia said. "Which we pouted about. She's seriously the best chance at Xander having a real partner. Too bad her God got in the way." She smirked and disappeared after a wink at Thor.

"That one swears to my brother," Thor said. Bucky nodded. "I'll see if she'll come visit."

"That's fine," Stark said. He stood up. "Let me get into that bag." He walked off. That was very interesting and he wanted to know what was so special about it. Since he opened it and found a goat sleeping the sleep of the sedated it was very weird. He pulled it out. It slowly shook off the sleep spell or whatever and started trying to eat one of his robots. A good force field kept it from trying to eat him when he tried to pull it away from things. "Yeah, what are you?" he demanded. "JARVIS, ask Thor if he knows anything about baby goats?"

"The myths do say he had a few pulling his chariot," the AI said. He cleared his virtual throat when Thor walked in. "Lord Thor, sir."

Tony pointed at the goat. "It tried to eat a robot and me."

Thor looked at it. "I know of that species. It will eat anything that can fit in its mouth. Including people. Only very strong warriors dare to fight with one as a test of manhood." The goat tried to bite him but he held up his hammer. It tried to chew on it but it zapped it. The goat shook his head and tried again. "It is persistent. May I send this home, Stark?"

"Give it to the healer as a present," he said with a hand wave. "Cannibal goats might be a bad idea."

Thor looked at the bag and took it gently to turn over and shook it gently. "Please divest yourself of your contents gently so nothing breaks." Things started to slowly fall out of it, making a huge pile. Thor looked up it then shook a few things loose. One took a hand to pull out but it was a spear. The bag finished emptying and he handed it back to Stark with a smile. Thor fashioned a muzzle for the goat and walked it off. The healer stared at it. "It was in the bag Bucky brought from Xander's warehouse."

"I know what they are. How did one find itself down here?"

"I know not," Thor said with a smile. "It was inside a bag of keeping."

"Interesting way to keep it from eating people. Don't get near it, people. It will eat people as well as anything else." It was chewing on the corner of a desk at the moment. He smiled at Thor. "Thank them for the present for me, Thor."

"I will. Have much fun with it." He left, going back to the lab. "He was most delighted, Stark, and sent his thanks."

"Not a problem. I owe him a lot of thanks." He was looking at things, sorting out the weapons. "Here, give that to Darcy and Andrew. It's a cookbook." He took it up to them. Stark had a lot of things to look through. Including some weapons that were a bit futuristic. "A hand laser, cool." He figured out how to use it fairly easily and how to make it better just after that.

***

Steve answered the phone the next morning. "Yes, Principal?" He listened. "I thought the girls were there. Let me check. Xander's in the tower infirmary due to a knife fight with some gods." He hung up and went down there. The girls were reading to Xander and each other. They were reading their history books at least. He cleared his throat. "You two are supposed to be in school."

Suzette shrugged. "Uncle Xander needs fussed over. We're taking turns with Dawn." She smiled. "It's good for him to have some fussing."

"They've got him on medicine to keep him asleep."

"That could make the hyena lady come out instead," Larissa said. "We're making sure he wakes up as a good boy like he usually is instead of her." She went back to reading. "Why do we have to study this stuff?"

"Because nothing's ever truly unique in human history," Steve said dryly. "It keeps repeating."

"Oh." She nodded and they went back to reading him sections. "We're okay. We're being good, Mr. Steve."

"Does your mother know you're skipping school?"

She looked at him. "My mom might not realize I'm not home right now. You know how she is. Whatever possessed her came back."

"Sure," he said, walking off. He called the principal back. "Both Suzette and Larissa are reading Xander their history books while he's being kept sedated," he said. "Yeah, I'll excuse her absence and call Larissa's mom to get her to talk to her daughter." He hung up and called her with a sigh. "Hi, Larissa's mom. It's Steve Rogers. No, she's not in school. She's here reading to Xander while he's sedated in our infirmary. A knife fight with gods. No, she didn't see any of that. They came in after he was out of surgery." He listened. "She's been here for the last six days," he said. "She wasn't sure you knew that or not." She said something and asked her boyfriend, who wondered when she suddenly had a daughter. She mumbled something and hung up. He sighed but nodded. He went back in there. "Larissa, your mom will call the school to okay skipping *today* but you have to go back tomorrow and I'm pretty sure you're going to be picked up tonight. Did you know she has a boyfriend?"

"I've seen him twice but I don't like him," she said with a shrug. "He's not good enough for my mom." She grimaced. "He's kind of a dick."

"Bad word," Suzette chirped. Larissa sighed and put some change into the jar beside the bed. Suzette handed over a dime. "She's right, Daddy, her mommy's boyfriend is a huge dick and he gives me creepy feelings."

"You two have a swear jar?" he asked dryly.

She smiled. "Yup, for charity."

"I like that idea and I'd wish you didn't have to give away so much change, daughter."

"I know, daddy. I'm trying."

"Try harder, both of you." He looked at Larissa. "If you're at home and something bad happens, you run back here. Got it?" She nodded. "Even if Suzette and I are in DC or something, come back here. The others will help you."

"I can do that," she said with a smile. "Or go to Cleveland."

"That's good." He left, going to talk to Andrew. He was in the kitchen with Darcy. "They've skipped school to read to Xander."

Darcy smiled. "That's sweet. Taste this." She held up a spoon.

He ate it and shrugged. "Not as good as your usual."

"I can't use butter with that one kid." He nodded and left them to work on it. She looked at Andrew. "Can you make pastries with rice flour?"

"I don't know," he admitted. He looked it up online. "There's a multi-grain one and one using rice flour," he said. She looked over his shoulder.

"Millet, sorghum, and oat blend?" she asked. "Where do you get that?"

"Yuppie food stores," he said. She nodded and they looked those up. There was one not that far away. New York was full of people on fashionable diets and gluten free was the latest fashionable one. They ran out to go find that store and look at things. When she explained what they needed and why the 'foodie' in there got them what they needed and a recipe book. They went back to the tower to work on that. Stark was eating the apple pie filling. Darcy rolled her eyes. Andrew smiled. "We can't use real butter. One kid's mom is against animal by-products."

"I know a few people like that. They're kind of miserable," Stark quipped. "Still nice enough." He looked. "You can make pastry crust without wheat?"

"Apparently. We're going to try it to see," she quipped with a smile. He nodded and let them be food magicians. He had the magic of science to go through and more things in that bag to wonder about. Including the pretty gem stones that weren't from any earth. He had no idea what they were but they were interesting to him and Bruce.

***

Xander blinked awake, staring at the woman at the end of his bed. "Hey," he said quietly, glancing around. "Out of my body?"

"Waking up, doofus." She stared at him, head tipped to the right. "Why?"

"Better the evil overlord you know instead of the one that'll cause more problems," he said quietly.

She snorted but smiled. "Yeah, true. They said thank you and they'll let you live until Stockholm in three years if you manage it."

"Thanks for the head's up." He stared at her. "Not that I won't go after them." He grinned.

"We know." She punched him on the foot. "Thanks."

"You were mine, I'm still a bit protective of what's mine. Means I haven't given up yet."

She smirked. "Sure. You say that now. What if I have to give you bad news?"

He smirked back. "With your bosses, it's all bad news."

"Where's the other one?"

He smiled. "Don't worry, I won't let it eat you or Inana."

She rolled her eyes but left. The Powers were trying to pull things back together. Only one stared at her. "He woke up and I gave him your message about Stockholm. He said thanks for the warning without a vision." She went back to where she and Whistler hung out off-duty to rest. He looked up from staring at his hat to stare at her. "He woke up."

"He's stronger than they like," he warned.

She leaned down with an evil look that used to make cheerleaders and jocks flee her. "Do you think he won't do the same to them?" she asked quietly. He moaned, staring at her. "We made a war. He may have taken them out because they were going to bother the slayers. Or as he put it better the evil overlords you know than the ones you don't. With Stockholm coming up in three years, what do you think he'll do?"

"He doesn't know."

"He has the visions for the Council," she said bluntly. She was aware they were being listened to. She smiled. "He had Stockholm two years ago, Whistler." He moaned, wincing some. The brim of his hat was being crushed. "He may allow for multiple deities, but his definition of those is a bit slimmer than the ones they use. They're not Gods. Only Inana's a goddess."

Whistler swallowed. "They'll hear you."

"They already know. Not like they don't snoop in our heads." She shrugged. "They know they started the war with Xander. They had Jesse be taken. They had him turned. They knew slayers needed some backbone a few years later. They found one and the Powers don't like it. But hey, I was scrying on that huge mirror and saw a Xander that's actually got a history of being a part-maenad."

Whistler shuddered. "That's an evil thought."

"Yes, it is," she said with a smile. "From a strong hunting family too." Whistler went pale, shaking his head. "Yeah, that one. It was so cute. He changed gender to go taunt people who needed to be taken out." She sat down with a twirl onto the couch and put her feet up with a smug look. "I saw one that was a redemption child too. Ours isn't the strongest Xander out there. Those ones may join this one though if he needs them to."

Whistler swallowed, slowly shaking his head. "Please don't wish that on anyone."

She grinned. "Me?"

"Please, Princess. Just...don't." She giggled and got comfortable for a nap. Whistler moaned, thinking about how bad that could be. The Powers that heard were scrying those Xanders and they were horrified. Theirs was nicely strong enough and meeker than some of them. They did not want those Xanders here. Ever! They would not put up with those other, stronger Xanders. They felt great pity for their Powers.

***

Xander blinked up, staring at the ceiling. "I heard that." The Powers quit thinking so hard about Xander. He smirked a tiny bit and got comfortable again. It was nicer without them having *ideas*. Though being part maenad seemed like it might be fun. He didn't want to change genders that way but it sounded like it might be fun otherwise. Plus strong hunters on that world.

Bucky walked in rubbing his head. "Why did I just get a slight vision of other versions of you?"

"The Powers were thinking too hard," he quipped. "Cordelia told them about them." He smiled. "They don't want them here." He groaned and grabbed his forehead. "Fuck!" he growled. "I already had this vision!" It changed and he moaned. "And this one. It's two years old!" A new one, one he hadn't had, showed up.

Bucky went to get a nurse. "Vision." She ran in to help him. He got the vision tea started. He carried a pack of it in his wallet just in case. Xander took it with his eyes squeezed shut, gulping the nasty mix. "Sorry it's cold." Xander gagged but drank it anyway. Once the vision stopped he leaned closer to his ear. "What did you see?" Xander shook his head, patting him hard on the head. It passed over and suddenly Bucky knew how a vision headache felt. "Damn," he muttered, rubbing his head. He stood up. "If I get one of those ever again I'm going to go destroy the Powers That Be myself." He wandered off to Stark's labs, going to write down the vision and finding the small box, put the paper in it. It disappeared once he closed the lid. Then he wandered off.

"What was that?" Stark demanded, getting up to follow him.

"Vision. Xander shared," he moaned.

"JARVIS, get him to Rogers," he ordered, sitting down. He looked at that box and scanned it. It was clearly magical and had a little letter on the front of it. "Huh. It's inter-realm mail. I wonder if Jane could tune that to Asgard when Thor's up there."

Steve got woken up by a persistent buzz, getting up to open his door. Bucky was just getting off the elevator. "What happened?"

"Xander shared his vision."

"C'mon, you can have my bed," Steve soothed, leading him to it and pushing him onto it. He took off Bucky's boots and shirt but let him sleep it off. Visions looked nasty each time he saw one. This one didn't look much nicer. "Do we need to know?"

"There were at least six Xanders there," he said, opening one eye slightly. "If we're at that, we'll be Xander'd to death."

"Yeah, I can hide from multiple Xanders." He went to sleep on the couch. The girls were in Suzette's room. Larissa's mother hadn't called back. Thankfully the last time Larissa had went home she had shown up with a bag full of clothes for herself. That was weird and they really had to talk to her mother in person soon.

***

Steve walked off the elevator at noon the next day, staring at Darcy, who was making Jane's lunch. With Thor apparently since it was a huge amount of sandwiches. He stole one with a weak smile.

She stared at him. "Bad meeting with Larissa's mom?"

"I don't know what's wrong with her. It's like she doesn't even miss her daughter. She said she'd make sure she got home tonight and they'd be talking about her running away habit."

"I don't think she's running away," Darcy said dryly. "I think she's fleeing the stupid."

"I think so too," he admitted. "When I called, her boyfriend asked if she had a daughter." Darcy groaned. "Yeah, that's about my feelings too. I have no idea what to do."

"We talk to Andrew."

"I can talk to Andrew," he agreed. "Though I don't want her to have to go to Cleveland already."

"Maybe she's got sensible relatives or another slayer family up here can adopt her."

"Maybe," he agreed. "He still here?"

"Went back this morning." Andrew appeared, giving her a hug. "You okay?"

"I heard my name mentioned in that 'better not tell Andrew way'," he quipped with a smile for her. "I'm not trying to take over the world today so I figured it was a bad thing."

"Larissa's mom," Steve said.

"Oh, that bad thing. Sometimes parents get freaky about having a baby slayer."

"Her boyfriend asked if she had a daughter. He didn't remember seeing her," Steve said. Andrew winced. "She also forgot what color her daughter's eyes were, which was when Xander talked to her about it. I had to call Larissa off school yesterday so had to talk to her. She said she was sure Larissa was safe and okay here."

"Yeah, that's bad. I'll talk to her. You're thinking another slayer family?" Steve shrugged. "I know it's not totally safe here with what you guys do, Steve. All right, let me talk to another slayer family first. How long was she here?"

"Six days this time," Darcy said. "She had been home overnight after a week."

"She brought clothes this time," Steve said.

Andrew nodded. "Yeah, that's well past time to fix it." He sighed. "Let me cab over." He walked off texting someone. He ran into Bucky, who looked pissed off. "You good?"

"Huge problem?"

"Larissa."

"Yeah, the girls snuck out, Steve," he called. Steve leaned out of the kitchen. "They're at the zoo by Suzette's tracker. I called over there and they had no idea the girls had left. Though her substitute teacher did say that Larissa had been sniffling all day. She looked upset so she figured it was something like being punished. They weren't missed for an hour."

"Some agents," Steve said dryly. He walked off. "Go with Andrew in case her mother throws a fit?"

"I'll find her a good stepmom," Andrew said. "Then we'll figure out what to do." They left together.

***

Steve found the girls in the zoo's security office. "Guys, what did my sneaky little girl and her best friend do?" he asked with a smile.

"The one that's not yours burst out crying," the security guard said. "They were up a tree cuddling and she was crying."

Steve nodded. "They skipped school because of it. Are they in trouble?"

"Not unless their school yells a lot."

"They didn't notice it for an hour," Steve said dryly. "They can't yell as much as I will be at them." The security guard let him into the room. He stared at them. "Okay, I want a *good* explanation."

"Her mommy said she's going to Cleveland tomorrow," Suzette said. "She's really upset and the school's not exactly good on mushy stuff so we were spending some last few hours together."

"First, bull crap on her going to Cleveland. Andrew didn't know that." Larissa stared at him. "I talked to Andrew and he's going to talk to your mother and see if one of the other associated families in the area would like to take you in." He squatted in front of her. "The tower is not all that safe. Bad guys attack us all the time," he said quietly.

"I know," she sighed. "Can she still visit?"

"Yeah, once she's not grounded for sneaking out of school again," he said, looking at his daughter.

"I knew you stuck me with the tracker thingy, Daddy. We were totally safe."

"Is the bus system really all that safe?" he asked.

"Yup. The guy sneered at us so I used my allowance to take a cab." He scowled. She shrugged. "It's safer than the subway!"

"Not much of an argument, Suzette. Though I do admire the sentiment and I'd have done the same thing if Bucky was being sent away." He sighed, looking at Larissa. "C'mon. We'll go wait on Andrew and Bucky to show up."

"Bucky went to talk to my mom?" Larissa asked, eyes wide. Steve nodded, standing up. "Is he going to threaten her? Because I don't want to have him do that even if it'd be cool."

"He can be subtle," Steve assured her. He held out a hand. The girls took one each and they went to look at things before going back to the tower. Andrew and Bucky needed time to work. Or threaten. Threatening would work for him. He had seen some parents who ignored their kids way back when but nothing this bad. They ran into Kate Bishop, who picked up Larissa. "Hey."

"My dad is really happy that I'll have a little sister." She stared at her. "Especially one I'll be helping instead of going out in a costume." She walked off with Steve and Suzette. "Bucky suggested I ask some of the ones I knew better than they did. My dad asked why so Bucky told him. He was horrified and gasped and insisted you come home and become a Bishop, Larissa."

"Would my dad mind?"

Kate shrugged. "I'll fire a message arrow at him later." She grinned and hugged her. "Now, there's still going to be rules. You'll still have to do good in school. You and Suzette can still play when you're not grounded and stuff. My dad's a pushover about some stuff but not schoolwork. Understood?" She nodded, staring at her. "It'll be cool. I can help you shop for school clothes since those are too small." She smiled at Suzette. "You can help."

"When she's not grounded," Steve said. "They snuck out of school for one last day together because Larissa's mom said she was going to Cleveland."

"She told the teacher," Suzette said. "The teacher said he'd miss her when she was in Cleveland."

Steve let go of Suzette and walked off to swear for a moment then came back calmer but texting Bucky. He could tell Andrew.

Kate smiled at him. "I do the same thing around the minis." They walked off together. She spotted a reporter. "Pap, left, ten o'clock," she hissed.

He looked and shrugged. "They can report my daughter likes to cut school."

"If they didn't miss her for an hour...doesn't she go to the SHIELD kids school?" Kate asked them. They nodded. "Wow, what weak agents." She snorted, looking at Larissa. "I'll teach you how to do it better like I did when I ran out to go meet with my teammates." She grinned, hugging her. The reporter rushed up. "I'd stop that," she warned.

"That's Captain Rogers. Are you working with the Avengers? Is that your daughter?"

"First, Larissa's like eight," Kate said. "I'm not old enough to have an eight-year-old daughter. She's going to be a little sister. She's a best friend to Suzette, and the girls are grounded so don't you *dare* take their picture or else I'll let my father buy your news rag." The reporter backed off, nodding quickly. "Thanks. They snuck out of school to go to the zoo." She smirked. "I'm retrieving her. Now, shoo. Right now." She waved a hand. The reporter didn't follow them but she also didn't get to take pictures of the kids because her camera broke without any visible reason. It just fell apart. Andrew met them at the entrance to the zoo with Bucky. He took Larissa from her. "She good?"

"Her mom signed papers your dad sent over." He smiled at her. "You looking forward to staying with Katie?"

"She's a great big sister. She's already proved that," Larissa said, staring at her.

"Nothing changes, kiddo. I'm just going to use you to distract our dad." She smiled. "That way I can get back to target practice." Larissa giggled. "When I can't sneak you out to go with me." They got driven home by Bucky. Steve and Suzette came so Suzette could help Larissa unpack her stuff and meet Kate's dad.

Suzette looked at the man in the doorway. "Hi, I'm Suzette. I'm her best friend."

"It's good she has such a good friend, but I will object to you leading her astray by skipping school, Suzette."

"Dad gets mad at that too," she sighed with a point at him.

He smiled and shook Steve's hand. "I'll need your number so we can keep track of those two are."

"Of course. She's got an emergency phone of her own but I can give you mine and Bucky's, Mr. Bishop."

"It's fine, Steven. I'm Arnold."

"Pleasure to meet you. Kate's one hell of a daughter and she's a great girl, always has been like a big sister to Suzette and Larissa."

"I like that about her, even though her extracurricular activities are going to drive me to drink." He looked at his daughter, who smiled angelically. "You can give her your bow, Katie."

"We'll see. She's not old enough for my bow yet, Dad." He rolled his eyes. "She's still learning a crossbow." The girls hugged her and they finished putting clothes up. "We'll go shopping next week, Larissa. Your shirts are all too small."

Suzette looked up at her father, smiling at him. "I know," he sighed. "We can let you go with Kate. But only if you're good."

"I'll be good, Dad." She grinned at Kate, who smirked back. They hugged Kate's dad then Andrew and Bucky, who were helping set Larissa up properly here. Suzette and Steve went home to tell Darcy what had happened. Darcy sent over recipes for her.

***

Xander came off the elevator singing 'I'm free' over and over, hugging everyone and kissing Darcy and Suzette on the cheek.

"Keep your lips to yourself," Stark ordered but he was grinning.

"You sure?" Xander quipped with a grin. "Because you have some of my stuff down there and you're playing with it. Most people that toy with my stuff are flirting with me."

"Yup. I sure am. You can have it back when I figure things out."

"It's magic, not tech."

"I found some tech and that's fine. Gives me a headache so I'll figure out the tech versions sooner. Plus your little mailbox thing is really handy. Jane said she wants to make one."

"I can get the spell for her." He looked at Jane, hugging her. "It's multi-realm, not to Asgard. The one Xander from there isn't on this realm and he doesn't tend to live up there. He lives in Colorado in a training camp." Thor's mouth opened and he stared at him, standing up. Xander grinned. "Easy, big guy," he said in old Norse. "He's your nephew in his world." He stared at him, smirking some. "He's a fully mated, in control of a lot of things, Protector of Humanity with his spouse, who is over heros."

Thor moaned. "That is ...how?"

"Mead with his mom, the River Goddess," he quipped.

Thor moaned and sat down, hugging Jane as a shield. "Please leave him there? It would confuse many."

"Yeah, probably. Unless something huge happens. Then we might have to move somehow." He shrugged and pounced Bucky since he had relaxed, kissing him on the cheek too. "I'm free! Let me go flirt!" He disappeared after rubbing his necklace.

Bucky sighed, checking his watch. He called someone. "Xander's free and flirting." He hung up. A few minutes later he got a message from an unknown number. "Oh, Miss Beldane has him flirting with her. Sure." He wrote back that he was barely out of the hospital, had surgery to seal a bunch of knife wounds, had to be healed and a spell used too. She asked why. So he told her. She said she'd take good care of Xander. Xander sent a 'thanks'. "Beldane has him well in hand."

"I'm sure a chaos mage can handle his leftover bored moments," Darcy quipped.

"He gave me and Larissa gift certificates for taking good care of him," Suzette said with a smile.

"You have fun at Godiva, kiddo," Darcy quipped with a smile. The little one gave her a wicked grin.

"With limits," Steve ordered patiently.

Stark shook his head. "At least I didn't bill him for it."

"We did learn a lot," Bucky said.

"Yeah, we did and still are," Jane agreed, looking at Thor. "How would he have made that mailbox?"

"No idea," he said. "I am not one of the magic using ones in the family."

"Can you ask?"

"I'll see if anyone knows. If not, perhaps you can send a letter to them introducing yourself and why you wanted to know." She smiled, working on that letter. He gave her a fond look but the thought of Xander being an Aesir was almost enough to cause a migraine. He could definitely see him as Loki's son for many reasons. Especially with the way he used chaos against others.

Stark got up to go back to the lab. Suzette knocked him down and dragged him back to the living room. "It's nearly dinner and you have to eat," she said patiently. "I helped cook so you have to eat tonight. You and everyone else." She stared at him. "I promise Natasha didn't poison any of us, Uncle Tony." She had her hands on her hips and one foot tapping.

He smiled at her. "You look a lot like Darcy when you do that." She blushed but smiled at him and pounced Darcy for a hug. "How soon on dinner?" he called.

"Ten minutes. Someone needs to set the table," Natasha called back. Clint obediently went to do that for her. Suzette got Bruce up there by having JARVIS lock him out of his lab until he came up to eat with them. It was a good family dinner.

The End.
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