Stark was staring at the morning news when he nearly choked. "Steve?" he yelled. He came out of his room buttoning up a dress shirt, staring at the tv where someone in a mask was talking about HYDRA.
"While we at HYDRA do not appreciate much about the current administration of this country, or the fighting back that some of the supposed heros are doing against us taking their jobs from them, we do appreciate the slayers. We will be protecting the slayers. We have and will continue to jump into their larger battles to back the girls up because they need it. We at HYDRA are true warriors; no little girl has to save us. Or their male backups in certain cases. We have pledged not to bother the slayers by any deeds or plans because we do not want to upset them.
"Frankly, many of us are scared of what happens if the slayers lose." He looked at the crowd. "We would never harm a slayer, and appreciate their respect for the peaceful demon and mutant communities. The fact that many of the slayers have stood up for those two communities makes us happy. They're not a threat to HYDRA's future rule so we are willing to work with them." He looked directly into a camera. "We do not feel it necessary to beat or otherwise harm innocent beings for being born. Nor will HYDRA ever do so. Hail HYDRA!" he finished and walked off.
Steve finished buttoning up his shirt. "Wow."
"Very," Stark agreed. "That's...I guess that's good."
The tv changed to a group of people outside the slayer house in Cleveland. Buffy walked out. "I just saw it, people. Thank you for alerting us," she called. She rubbed her hands on her pants. "Sorry for the jeans but I just got up." She looked around. "We appreciate HYDRA being so honest and protecting the girls. We have no beef with HYDRA or their people, until they do something that pisses off our allies or our Xander. Because some did try to take Xander and he beat them pretty badly a few times."
She smiled a bit. "If they want to jump into battles, great. We welcome the help usually because there's not that many of us. We don't like some of their political viewpoints. Really, we're more oriented toward 'can't we all get along' than 'we'll rule over you' the way HYDRA is but we appreciate that they like us doing our jobs. We can't really reciprocate because we don't like the viewpoint that they should be on top of everyone. Really, most of us are kinda more peaceful than not. So yay, they're great to jump in and to protect my slayers, but boo on the group's outlook on humanity. Thanks though.
"Oh, and Faith wanted to know if anyone beyond Magneto has made a statement about that stupid law. She's worried about the girls who're dating mutants. I know the girls can and will protect their lovers. I did when I had one," she said with a sigh at the end. "Faith does when she has one. We're just happy that those girls found someone good and decent to date."
"What about that law saying they were exempt from all laws and protections?" one reporter shouted.
Buffy looked at him. "Wow, someone was *way* stupid. My mother would be climbing out of her grave to come beat someone to death with a shoe. If I don't get there first." She frowned. "I know it's probably some sort of panic going on but it's pathetic. Way pathetic. Totally so pathetic that I'm hoping they all have therapists. Good ones that can show them about reality. Because if they hate people for being born, then they should hate themselves for the same reason. After all, we're all a bit mutated from the originating source. Otherwise we'd all be clones and still stooped down, plus really hairy." The reporter gaped, staring at her. She stared back. "We would be. If we were clones we'd still be in a cave grunting. Though, honestly that wasn't a bad state to be in. You don't worry all that often about things."
"You time traveled?"
She grimaced. "There was a sorcerer who hated college kids who drank. He kinda had his sorcerer brother-in-law put stuff in the beer to revert you. The more you drank the more you went backwards." She licked her lips. "Slayers have a really high metabolism and I was with some frat boys. Thankfully I burned all the pictures of me with the brow ridge while I was going 'fire pretty'." She shrugged. "I haven't drank since then and we have the formula in case some of the minis want to start to drink too." She rushed into the house.
"Where is Mr. Harris!" one of the reporters yelled after her. "Is he all right?"
Faith leaned out. "The guy he saved got him to a competent doc and they managed to save him. He's resting comfortably and being fussed over by a few future slayers and their siblings. Bye now. The girls have to go to school soon and you know how we feel about the minis being on camera." The reporters trailed off and Faith went back inside.
Stark looked back at Steve, who sighed but nodded. "We can answer those and I'll make sure Pepper's seen it on the way to the press conference."
"I'll text her," Stark said, doing that. "Wear the other shirt, Rogers. It looks better on you and fits you better in case you have to fight." He nodded, going to change shirts and came out putting on a jacket. He went to meet Pepper and Natasha. Stark leaned back, drinking his first cup of coffee. "I'm so glad no one had that formula when I was a teenager," he muttered.
***
Xander woke up again, looking at all the kids then at the doctor at the foot of his bed. He shrugged and winced a bit. "They decided I needed fussed over," he said quietly.
"I can see that."
"I woke up with them all over my chest and stomach."
"That's sweet of them." She smiled. "Are they yours?"
"I'm pretty sure they're all related to Miss Wanda somehow."
"Huh. Let me call her. They could probably use cleaned up and fed." She called up there. Wanda came in with her brother. She sighed as she stood in the doorway. "The nurse's note said a few got up to go to the bathroom when Mr. Harris did, but the rest slept all night."
She nodded. "Wonderful." She handed the youngest to her brother to carry up to their rooms then came back. She woke a few by patting their hands.
"Try a foot," Xander said quietly. "Moms tend to pat shoulders so that'd mean comfort probably." She nodded, patting feet. That woke up most of the kids. A few flipped over and snored while grabbing something to cuddle. Xander sat up, shifting some to tickle a few of the most stubborn. That woke all but Bethy up. He tickled her harder, making her swat and glare at him. He grinned. "It's morning. You should go eat. Your aunt wants you to go eat with her." He pointed with a grin.
She scowled at her aunt. "I'm sleeping!" she complained. "It's early!"
"It's nearly nine." Wanda smiled helping her to her feet. "You can come check on Xander later. After food and a shower. Did you bring clothes?"
"Oops. I forgot my bag."
"We can figure that out," Pietro said, staring down at her. "At least you don't need diapers." She snorted but hugged his stomach until he picked her up and helped herd all his spawn upstairs.
Wanda smiled at Xander. "They do want to fuss."
"They can come read to me later if they want."
"That might work for them." She smiled, heading out with the last few.
The doctor came in, shaking her head. "They're adorable."
"They're all her relatives but a few were my future mini slayers. The grumpy one is one of mine in a few years."
"That's nice of them." He nodded it was. "Shift over so I can check your wound." He did that. She looked over it, testing a few stitches. "I need to inject some alcohol."
"No," Xander said, shaking his head. "I react wrongly to a lot of things. I usually heal with neosporin. Alcohol wipes don't always do good unless it's real rotgut stuff."
"We have sterile alcohol."
He shook his head, pointing at another scar. "That got a lot of alcohol cleaning. It stayed infected for weeks." She winced as she looked at it. "That was my secondary appendix scar." She looked at him. "Really horrible hospital. Thankfully I had a friend at the time who had a mom with medical texts we both read. I can do some really good field medical things." He looked at himself. "I could probably go home with that and it'll be fine, but thank you, Doctor." He smiled.
She stared at him. "Most people would be in the hospital for a few days, Mr. Harris."
Xander nodded. "I've had cuts that were really near organs and still had to battle the next day." He grimaced. "I'm really good at healing injuries."
She gaped. "Why?"
"No one else to do it."
"Oh." She slumped. "I really should clean it."
"It's good, not pussed at all." He shifted to stretch. "Only a little bit of a pull so I'll be okay. You guys did great work."
The nurse walked in, staring at him. "We can do an external cleaning."
Xander grinned. "Neosporin is how I usually do it. Nothing's going to keep it from scarring."
"Point about the scar potential." She gently pressed around it, seeing the small wince of pain. "Not a lot of pain?"
"Less than the last time I got shot. But that was a militant yahoo with a book of faith and an attitude problem." The nurse stared at him. He grinned. "I was in Africa then."
She nodded. "Wonderful."
"I thought so but I was making them deal with their own shit. They wanted to open that portal," he said dryly. "They got to open that portal and then get eaten." He grinned. "They weren't happy and decided it was my fault."
The nurse nodded. "A lot of people are like that today." She got a few things to change the bandage and clean the outside area. "That's not too bad." She rebandaged it. "There you go. Go take a washcloth bath and get back into bed."
"I could go home," he said.
"Not yet," the nurse said with a smile. "Go clean up. You look sweaty." He nodded, going to do that. She smiled at the doctor. "Are you our new resident?" She nodded, handing over her ID. "That's wonderful, dear." She handed it back. "Dr. Horrner is going to be here in about an hour." She went to make that note on the chart and check on the agents. They mostly got released but one was in traction. SHIELD hadn't come to get him yet. She alerted Maria Hill so she could call someone.
Hill strolled in, going to talk to that agent. She got him headed to a safe location to rest then went in to talk to Harris, who was talking to the doctor. "Mr. Harris, can I debrief you about the vision you had?"
"Sure," he said with a grin for her. The doctor left them alone. "Can I go home?" he asked quietly.
"Tonight. Barton's been with your girls. There's agents sitting on the house. HYDRA just had a press conference saying they respected and liked the slayers so they'd never harm them, and they liked how empathic they are to the peaceful communities and mutant communities both." Xander rolled his eyes. "Buffy's response was basically 'that's great and we like that you like us, but we still think you do bad things'." She leaned on the foot of his bed. "I'm hoping that means they won't come after you again."
"Me too," Xander agreed. "I hate beating people."
She stared at him. "You didn't count the last time you got shot? I had the security footage up in case."
"No, that was about four gunshot wounds ago," he said quietly, shifting some. "I don't like to think about Egypt and only count it as one."
"I can understand that. What did you see?"
"I saw Rogers being shot on the courthouse's stairs. I saw him falling down. I saw Stark vowing revenge and burning a lot of things to the ground. I got flashes of them fighting against each other, real battles against each other, and others taking advantage of that. That one wasn't new though." She nodded once. "Did you get that one?"
"I did. I had Barton check your vision journal in case you had time to write that one down. Steve did say 'thank you' and next time to warn him."
"His phone was hacked, it was answered by a lady who snorted when I said I had to talk to Steve."
"I have no idea who was answering his phone," she admitted. "I can handle that." She quit leaning. "Why did you pop in then out then in again?"
"Out was trying to get the guy on the building but I couldn't. So I popped home, grabbed my vest, and put it on as I came back. I only had five minutes and I was still having the lovely migraine from the vision. They really need to not come with headaches."
She blinked. "They do?"
"Yeah. Not as badly as Cordelia had with hers, but yeah. Lots and lots of headaches. Almost nothing works on it. I have an herbal thing I take sometimes but it doesn't kill it, just dulls it."
She nodded once. "We've tried different meds?"
"Yeah. She tried everything. I've tried half of everything. I wasn't going to go to street drugs, especially since she said that most of them didn't help at all."
Hill nodded. "That's good to know." She looked toward the nurse then at him. "How did he get all those kids?" Xander shrugged slightly. "Good point."
"When Bethy first met him she told him he needed better condoms."
Hill smirked. "That might help, yes." She stared at him. "You can probably go home tonight."
"Thanks. I can probably go sooner."
"Probably not," she ordered. "You're protected here."
"Has the shit storm stopped?"
"Not hardly. Though HYDRA made a statement." He groaned, shaking his head. "Buffy made one about their statement. Everyone's wondering why someone like Xavier hasn't yet."
"So was I when it came out. Or any of the teams."
"That's a good point," Stark said as he walked in. "We can probably get the other teams to comment before we can get Xavier." He looked at Xander. "Steve said thank you." Xander shrugged slightly but grinned. "The kids?"
"I'm pretty sure that was Bethy or Diana's ideas."
"How did he get so many?" Hill demanded. "Beyond using crappy condoms."
"Some were hero groupies who found a used condom," Stark said dryly. "Some, HYDRA made." She groaned, shaking her head. "The baby of the group had a mom who was HYDRA but got crashed into last night."
"She's also a mini slayer and mutant," Xander said.
"Wow," Stark complained. "That's a horrible future."
"No, actually Bethy and the other few older ones think it'll make them stronger and they all do extra training with their special skills," Xander said. "Bethy's downright militant about training sometimes."
"We found out last night that she knew that baby slayer and the others."
"Yeah, she and Diana run a mailing list for the kids," Xander agreed, grinning at him. "They have sleepovers and play dates all the time."
"She's good to them," Hill said. "That's sweet of her." She looked at Stark. Then at Xander. "You can probably video chat with your girls. You know how they worry."
Xander nodded. "Bethy growled something about needing to fuss over me since I won't let the bigger ones."
"Yeah, she told us that last night," Stark said. Xander grinned. "They're rerunning the HYDRA and Buffy's statement on CNN non-stop while they talk about them." Xander flipped the channel to watch it, staring at it. He grimaced at HYDRA's. Then snorted at Buffy's. "How many of the new watchers are HYDRA?"
"We think two are but they're *real* protective in the right way over the girls so we're just watching them to make sure they don't have brain farts." Xander looked at him. "We'd have turned them away but desperate people and all that old saying."
"That's a good thing," Hill agreed. "The girls need backed up by people with skills and sense. What if they have to decide between the two?"
"I had a midnight talk with them," Xander said honestly. "Me and my pretty battle axe, and a bomb. I vowed to the Goddess if they hurt my slayers or did something to them that made them act in bad ways I'd be there to shove that bomb up their asses. I've had to prove it once with one of the other guys. Wasn't HYDRA but he wanted the girls to be redneck princesses who hated everyone but white girls. He started his slayer discriminating and actually tried to get her to summon a demon to remove any non-white slayers. The demon told me about that and I showed up to shove that explosive up his ass so the summoning he was doing was destroyed. I saved her because she was tied up and she's gotten some therapy but Buffy said we do not talk about that incident."
Hill stared at him. "So you did make him explode?"
"Yeah. He had to so the summoning didn't work. Unless you wanted an ancient God king to show up?"
"No," she said. "Not really." Stark was shaking his head.
"Then it had to be stopped with his death and blood. It was that or torture him over it. I went for humane."
Stark nodded, walking off. "Sounds like an idea to me, Harris. It probably was more humane." He patted him on the foot. "You rest."
"I need to get home before the girls won't give up your teammate."
Stark grinned. "Steve went to help too. You can go home tomorrow."
"Tonight," Hill said, looking at him. "That way the girls are protected."
"Has someone tried again?" Xander asked.
"No," she said. "The agents there have stopped anyone trying and the one person who tried to protest Miffy came out to scream at her and ended up kicking her on the leg when the woman sneered at her about being born a slayer. Barton got her back inside and talked to about not taunting the deluded."
Xander nodded. "We get a lot of those. Personally I'm all for them saving themselves sometimes."
"They'd hate that. It'd give them nothing to complain about," Stark said dryly. "Let me talk to a few people." He went to make a mass call. After the last one was gotten he cleared his throat. "People, have we noticed the press situation about that stupid law here in New York state, LA's city law, and the one in Illinois?"
"We've tried to help," Sue Richards said. "Why hasn't Xavier made a comment? HYDRA did this morning and that's weird."
"It was," Stark agreed. "Have you guys made one?"
"I didn't think it'd help," she admitted. "Logan?"
"Yeah, one of us needs to. Xavier said it'll be overturned in court once people realize it was done."
"We think he's wrong since a US senator put a version up for debate earlier," Stark said dryly. "And it was getting some serious talk."
"Crap," Logan said. "Hey, One Eye, go put on the suit and talk to the press. They're trying that law in the US now instead of locally."
"It's not just us," Sue said. "It's us, LA's itself but not the state, and Chicago."
"All of Illinois," Stark corrected. "It started in Chicago and got passed state wide. Pepper made a statement this morning with Steve and Natasha standing behind her. I'm about to make one."
"We can definitely do that," Sue agreed. "We're not going to be treated like some scientific oddity to be locked up. Are the slayers all right?"
"Yeah. They've got agents guarding them and Barton's there. By the way, their law? It stated any enhanced being was one. So basically they named my whole team outside myself and Barton."
"That's sweet of them," Logan said sarcastically. "We've been fighting against this sort of thing for a while. Has anyone seen Ross? He should've been gloating by now."
"Arrested the other day," Stark said happily. "He tried to invade to get Bruce. Between us, Natasha with a flame thrower, and the two pets, they didn't get a lot of help."
"Good," Logan agreed. "All right, let's start reaching out. Xavier is giving me this disappointed look again." He hung up.
"Let me talk to Reed," Sue said. "And others that we know on other teams, Tony. Thank you."
"Welcome, Sue, and thanks for the help." He hung up, going up to get dressed so he could make his own statement. Pepper's was great but people were probably wondering what he was going to do too. He was liked that way by the press. He ran into a mini slayer trying to get in and took her up to the infirmary so she could sob on Xander. He got a nod for it while Xander cuddled her. Stark went down to the waiting press people, nodding at Steve. "Thanks for helping her get in."
"Who?"
"One of the minis just showed up," he said.
"Mini slayer? One of them is here?" one of the reporters demanded.
"She wanted to check on Xander," Stark said, looking at them. "She was sobbing on him when I left her up there with him." He looked at the mass of people. "We, most of us on the team but I can't talk to the ones I haven't talked to yet today, are all appalled by that new law, and the senators who tried to put it before the US senate earlier."
Steve glared. "They did?"
"Yeah, two tried about an hour ago." He looked at him. Then at the press. "There's no way any of us would support that law. We may disagree on things as teammates, but we all agree that this law, in all the forms, is bad. It's going to cause more hell, it's going to make people less secure, and it'll probably end up taking out a lot of people who might be the one who'll protect humanity some day soon. We all *loathe* that law's intent and reality. We loathe that they came after little kids for being born. They're *so* very pro-life outside of mutants so they need to quit being hypocrites and man up to their needing white sheets."
Steve shook his head. "That law is more wrong than most things the US has done in all its history. We do not support it, as a team or as an individual. Frankly, I'd rather save those kids than anyone who likes that law. Because I'm not going to stand for that to start in *my* US."
Stark nodded. "We hated it when it started against the peaceful demon communities. We hate it just as much now when it's coming after the mutant communities. Frankly, a lot of us think that sitting back so you can destroy yourselves is a worthwhile activity to prove your intentions. I'm not like that but others have noted that. Do you really think our team wants to save people who hate us?" He looked at one reporter in particular. "Your story yesterday led the bigots right to a baby slayer's door. Are you proud of getting her family killed?" He walked off.
"If you were responsible for deaths, I think you should be held legally responsible," Steve said then walked off shaking his head. "It's sad that HYDRA is better behaved and less hateful than the average person in this city. This isn't the US I fought for."
The reporters were glaring at that one of them and then at the protestors around the tower. They decided to run the statement uncut because at least one blogger had gotten film of the statements.
This was going to get nasty.
The only worse thing would be another demon problem.
***
Xander looked up from his bed, staring at the ceiling. He could hear someone babbling in a demon language. "Yo," he said quietly. "I can hear you." They quit letting him hear the conversation. A few minutes later it came back and the nurse caught him muttering at the ceiling. He waved her in. "Can you hear it?"
"Are you hearing voices?" she asked patiently.
He laid a hand on her arm. "Can you hear them now?"
She looked up, looking confused. "What is that?"
"That is the demonic mafia, who is in bed with the Russian mob, plotting to call something huge to take over the US." He looked at her. "I don't know why they're telling me this," he said dryly. "Because I'm honor bound to stop them."
He quit touching her hand and she quit hearing it. "That's so weird."
"I asked them nicely not to let me know," he said. "Apparently they decided I needed to get out of this bed to come stomp some demon ass," he said more loudly. They quit. He grinned at her. "They're sorry they're annoying me."
She patted him on the hand. "You should rest, Xander. You really should. That way you can't get up to stomp on them for at least a few more hours."
Xander slid back down, watching the news people babble about their own stupidity. A few hours later, when he couldn't move because of his IV with medicine, the babbling in demon languages came back. He looked at his phone. "Oh, phone." It beeped on. "Email Dr. Strange. Dear Dr. Strange, I won't even make fun of your name this time. Apparently two of the demons that are in your class to handle are presently trying to make alignments with the demonic mafia, who is in cahoots with the Russian mafia, to summon them so they can be helped making power moves while all this messiness is going on. Please let us know if you need help with yours so we can step in before it becomes a major problem and I have to blow up more of the demonic mafia's places. Thanks. Xander Harris, head watcher in NYC. Send email," he dictated.
"Email not sent," his phone said. "Address not recognized."
Xander groaned and shifted, leaving that one arm in place. He barely managed to grab his phone, getting a scowl from the nurse. He waved the phone and selected the proper email address from his contacts list then sent it with a magical rider. The app Willow had created for witches was very handy for sealed communications. Xander put his phone next to his hand and relaxed again. This was going to suck. What was on the news was horrifying. What was being hissed about by the demons he could hear was horrifying. "I really need to use a stored wish," he decided. Suddenly, no more demons being heard. On the news, demons were showing up to protect the mutants and slayers. He grinned. "Go poker buddies, I choose you to do my job while I'm trapped here in this bed," he muttered.
One reporter caught Dr. Strange going to talk to a demon about his idea of joining with the human mafia. In the background the reporter caught the mafia guys going 'bro, that's not gonna look good on us, bro' and Xander grinned. He knew those ethically deficient people. He sent a text message to one about how he'd end up being a sacrificial victim and did he want to be buried or cremated after that higher demon was done with his remains. The mafia guys fled the scene so the couldn't be killed for helping. Xander waved at the tv. It was so nice of them. The reporters were worried about that fleeing but had no idea what had been said. The demons decided they didn't want to upset that sorcerer, who vowed he would ask Rosenburg for help if need be, and they really didn't want to be involved in that sort of problem.
Then the bad idea happened.
One of the local minis walked up to the demons and kicked him on the knee. "You're trying to do mean things to us. That's not right."
The demon stared down at her. "You're a tiny human. You should be in a guarded place."
She scowled, hands on her hips. "I'm a future slayer and you're going to be a dead demon if you do something that hurts my brand new baby brother. My mommy would be *very* upset with that and I like him, so far, so if you try something that'll get him hurt I'll make you *real* sorry."
Dr. Strange looked at her. "You are too young to threaten him."
She glared at him. "Shut up! You're not my daddy! He has class and can match clothes! Unlike yours." She looked at the demon again, still scowling. "You're going to be in a lot of trouble and I'm telling Faith."
"If that spicy slayer wants to come be a sacrifice we can do that," another demon said as he joined them. "The same as you could be." He tried to grab her and the protections on her burned that demon. Strange burned the others.
"I don't believe you should be doing that." He looked at the child and pointed. "Go. Home. Now." She huffed but pouted as she stomped off. He glared at the cameraman. "Must you do that?"
"Yup," the reporter said with a wave. "This is important stuff. If the city's going to be invaded I want to tell the rest of the city so we can all hide."
Xander winced at the sound of squealing brakes and summoned his axe and wand, then his jeans. He waved at the nurse, taking his phone with him as he went to help that baby slayer. The two guys in the car that were trying to grab her were getting kicked by her but Xander took them both out. "You don't touch a slayer," he said quietly. "Ever. You should know that by now. Porgi does so why don't his minions?"
"Who're you?" the driver of one car demanded as he got out. His eyes went wide. "Xander," he said, backing up, hands up. "Porgi said to pick her up to protect her, man. We were not going to hurt her."
Xander stared at him. "For some reason the lie detector I honed on teenage girls is chirping 'bullshit' at me," he said dryly. "I don't know why." The guy swallowed. "Go. Now." He got into the car and drove off. He stared down at his slayer. "You have sense," he said quietly. "I know you have sense. Your mother has sense, your father has sense, and your baby brother has sense, so why did you suddenly lose yours somewhere? Should we find a lost and found box to search for it?"
She pouted. "They're gonna be mean to my baby brother!" she said with a foot stomp.
Xander leaned down to stare at her. "You're too young to do anything but whine about it," he said quietly. "That's my job or Faith's job or some police officer's job. Not yours until you're much older. What's the rule on going to face down demons for minis?"
"We can ask the nice ones about themselves but not to go near the bad guys or the poker halls because we're too young and someone might hurt us, even if we have an adult with us," she sighed. He nodded. "But...." Xander glared. She shrank down. "I didn't want him hurt."
"I don't want him hurt either but you getting hurt would drive your parents nuts. Certifiably nuts. They'd bring your new baby brother with them around the bend and up the river. Your mom would become the great evil in the universe so therefore you're not to do shit like that," he said with a point back at the building. "Am I clear?" She nodded, looking down and pouting. "Good. Now, let's get you home."
"You're still sore," she said, blinking at him. "You shouldn't be here either."
"Dear, I got out of a bed while being so sick I should've been in an ICU unit and had to go handle a battle. When you're old enough I'll teach you how to avoid that. Until then I'm a grown man and you're not." She nodded, walking off pouting. He followed her to her door, where her mother was waiting. He waved. "We had a talk about her lack of sense."
"It got covered. One of my coworkers caught it and called me in a panic that my daughter was going to die. You're right, I'd become the next great evil," she said, looking down at her daughter.
She sniffled. "Grounded?"
"You're going to be lucky if you don't have to go live with your grandmother." She pointed in the house. Her daughter stomped in there to cuddle her brother. "Let him sleep," she snapped. She looked at Xander. "You got out of a hospital bed to fight a battle?"
"Yeah, twice," he admitted. "One was with malaria and their military helped me out of my bed to come help them and the other one was nasty and in town." He shrugged. "I was the only one there. Some day she hopefully won't have to do that because she won't be alone and you can teach her sense."
"I'm trying," she agreed. "Go back to wherever you're hiding, Xander." She walked in and slammed the door. The neighbors could hear the yelling starting by the mini's father.
Xander walked off, going to the poker hall. Some guy tried to grab him so he decked him then turned to beat his ass. "Oh, it's you," he sneered, kicking him around. "Mind fucking little toad." The guy tried to run but Xander managed to catch him to beat him some more. A few of the demons came out to watch. "Guys, you know the pretty one I flirt with? He's her enemy."
"We can call her," one said. "Should you be doing that with a healing wound?"
"No." The guy tried to wiggle free and then tried to compel him until he ran into the hyena, then he screamed and cowered a bit. Xander grinned. "What, don't like hyenas? She's real nice."
"Jessica will save me," he sneered.
Xander sneered back. "I know assassins that do that better than you do and they don't need saved by their enemies." The man snorted but Xander kicked him in the hip, making him yelp. "Really? You think you're that good?" Someone was running toward them and he looked then he shot the bad guy in the ankle. "Hey, Summers."
"Harris?"
"This mind fucking little bastard has been using his gifts the wrong way. The little toad believes he *deserves* some people to be owned." He sneered at him. "I should find an ex to talk to you." The man was holding his ankle and trying to get away from him.
"We don't have anything on him," Scott Summers said.
One of the demons waved a flipper. "We do. He's using his mind control gifts to make people puppets to play with. He's making them do gross things too."
"Including illegal gross things," Xander said. "Because I heard he used his skills to make a prostitute torture her john for his pleasure."
Scott winced. "That's unethical. We can bring him to some of the higher mutants for a hearing. We have our own sort of judge and trial system going."
Xander looked at him. "I don't trust them. I haven't trusted them. Your higher power tried to do the same thing to me during a meeting," he said dryly. "And didn't like the hyena any more than this guy does. He's sneered about the girls, the fact that they get normal lives, that they get to date, that Kara's seriously in love with her guy, all that stuff. I'll be damned if the mind fucking freak you serve will let this version of his skills go." He looked back. "Good," he said. "Luke?" He grimaced but walked over. "He look familiar to you?"
"Yes," he growled. "We can handle this slimebucket." He hauled him up. "Let's go talk."
"Let me know if you need help," Xander said. "I hate people like him. It's no better than doing will spells on people." Scott Summers shuddered at that mention.
"If he's going to be taken out, I know a few demons who would nicely trade for his life," one of the poker demons said with a toothful grin. "They would enjoy his skills."
Luke shook his head. "He owed someone a few debts with what he's tried with her."
"She won't let you," Kilgrave spluttered.
"Shut up or I'm having you eaten," Xander said bluntly. "I can use you to trade for weapons for the girls or to trade for a future wish to stop all the stupid going on. Or as a piece of bait the next time we have an ascension going on." Luke shuddered, shaking his head. "I know, that's mean, but worthwhile for one like him." He looked at the demons. "When's the next ascension?"
"Three weeks," one said. "Uptown."
"Great. Is it one of the assholes who wanted that bill?" They all shrugged. "Hmm. Great." He looked at Luke again. "Need help?"
"Nah. We've got him, Xander. You go be fussed over."
"I'm okay enough. The girls are going to be frantic later." He looked at Summers. "Some guys are too bad to risk. Would you let a serial killer possibly get away?" he asked quietly.
"No. Is he?"
"He's into a lot of stuff."
"I'll let others know about him."
"Thanks." He looked at the poker guys. "I'm going to the bar." They all nodded. "If the girls show up, don't tell them so I have a few hours without fussing?"
"You're not gonna get that," a male voice said from above them. "I already sent film of all that to the girls. Penny's already swearing about you," Deadpool said when they looked up at him. "They can come pick you up at the bar."
"I was going to find one of my ex's for a few hours. They could feed me dinner, baby me, and then fuck me stupid so I can sleep tonight."
"Those are good things but it'd mean your ex would be invaded by the girls. You know how they are." He pointed. "March." Xander nodded, heading that way. He grabbed the wand. "Before I turn into a panda bear this time instead," he complained.
"Zebra?" Xander joked.
"No. I like being human. My girlfriend would hate me being a horse dicked guy. Way too big for most women."
"I can probably do a centaur."
"I'm not the guy with the bow. He's handling the fussy slayers you have."
"I'm going to spell him later."
"Yeah, right," he snorted. They ran into Clint, Deadpool handing over the wand. "He wanted to make me a centaur. I'd have to steal your bow."
"You'd have to learn how to use it first," Clint joked, walking Xander off.
"I was coming!"
"Yeah. Yay. The girls are even making dinner. You can call in one of your ex's instead. Hell, I could call one. I know a few you've been said to be sleeping with." Xander nodded. They got back to the slayer house and he let Miffy and the younger girls take Xander from him. Clint did send a text message to a contact he knew would probably know Xander. The guy knew almost everyone. That one promised to send two boyfriends and a girlfriend to come help him. They were already on their way. Only being held up by border patrol.
Clint called that in and told Fury that the boyfriends could probably control Xander for a few days at least. That was something Fury really wanted, the more militant people under his thumb while they worked this problem out. Before Xander had to go out to save everyone again, and got injured again. Or killed because that might mean most of the slayers left the US for good.
***
Steve Rogers walked into the meeting with the other mutant and hero teams, nodding at a few he knew pretty well. "Stark sent me. He's back in science land." He sat down at the table. "So, how are we handling things?" he asked Coulson since he was there.
"Poorly at the moment. Harris?"
"Back with his girls. Clint's already noted that some of his occasional lovers are on their way to protect the girls and baby him."
"That's good," he agreed. "It can only help." The lights went out and he sighed. "Who was followed?" he asked dryly. A group with guns burst in and then suddenly turned into twelve inch high ponies. Like My Little Ponies dolls but alive. One let out a frustrated neigh and tried to bite but little teeth didn't even dent a pair of jeans.
Logan looked up. "Thanks, Harris," he called with a wave. He looked at the others. "So," he said dryly. "Now what?"
"Now, we figure out how we're going to handle this because if we show up at an emergency there's a good chance we'll be fired on," Steve said. "But we can't really just not show up."
"That is a good point," Coulson agreed. He put one of the ponies on the table since it was trying to climb his leg. It tried to head butt him. "I'm going to smack you into a wall," he told it. "Shut up and sit down before I give you all to an orphanage." It sat, staring at him. He looked at the others again. "Do we want to mix teams of volunteers for a major event? Some of you are less destructible than others but I don't want any of you hurt."
"I'm not in the mood to save 'em," Logan said. "Half the ones that'd do that will probably cause a problem on purpose."
"Probably," Steve agreed. "Is there better armor we can wear? I can't just sit and watch the world going to hell."
"There's some but your suit should be bulletproof," Coulson told him. "The dark blue stealth suit is supposed to be. Unless someone faked the test results."
"I can have Stark check," he said. "Just in case." The others nodded. "What happens if it's a demonic emergency instead of the usual battles?"
"Pray like hell the slayers have body armor," Sue Richards said with a grimace. Steve shook his head, backed up by Coulson. "Why not?"
"It's too stifling during battles," Coulson said. "I've offered to help them design one specifically for the girls, something along the lines of Romanoff's suit, but they said it's too confining. We helped them find some suitable patrol clothes in kevlar, but otherwise they're in normal clothes most of the time."
"At least Xander stopped that stupid plan earlier," Dr. Strange complained. "Though it was odd he was emailing me."
"He was in our infirmary," Steve said. "He checked himself out to get away from fussing." He looked at Coulson. "How many more kids did HYDRA make?"
"None that we're aware of and I've had people looking. We found the DNA lab. We've destroyed it completely." Steve relaxed. "At least they're not asking him for child support."
"Who?" Sue asked.
"Pietro," Steve said with a grimace. "HYDRA made him a few, a few women who were hero groupies got hold of his DNA to make a few, and a few he had crappy condoms." She moaned. "There's about thirteen of them all told, but they're sweet kids. They all showed up last night to cuddle Xander and make him feel better, then nagged him half the morning about getting hurt."
"Oh. My. God," she muttered, shaking her head. "I hope Johnny never has that problem."
Logan grinned at her. "Harris had me looking up the kid's dad for the first meeting. She told him he needed better condoms first thing. Then told him she knew about five of them." She shuddered, leaning back in her chair. "She's real mouthy but has both slayer and mutant gifts. Harris said she gets extra training so she can handle both."
"That poor girl," she said.
"She's the one that called the other kids to come fuss at Xander," Steve said. "Some from New Jersey." He leaned his elbows on the table. "She heard one of the HYDRA created ones was newly born and a pre-slayer so she barged in to meet her with another of her siblings. Told the mother that they were going to be showing up to play with her and get her used to all the other siblings. Mom was HYDRA and had a crash. Pietro is not really amused but he's gone past shuddering."
"Good," Coulson said. "That's good. He's got a lot of choices there."
"Stark's looking up doctors for him."
Coulson nodded. "I have a short list of ones I trust."
Dr. Strange looked at Steve. "For a snip?" Steve nodded quickly. "I know three locally that are excellent. I'll pass on the list."
"May I have it as well?" Coulson said. "That way I have a list of people I can trust with agents who are having problems."
"I can make my personal list into an email later," he said. Coulson slid his card down the table with a smile. "Many need that sort of help?"
"We've had agents that had to have theirs stitched up after a bad bar fight," Steve said. "I met one of those who was post-surgery and complaining about healing." He looked at Coulson.
"Hiding in Wisconsin," he said. "Healing."
"He got cut that way in a bar fight?" Sue asked.
Steve nodded. "Yes, he did."
Coulson nodded harder. "Nearly bisected by a broken bottle." She winced. The guys all winced more and mostly tried not to grip themselves. "We all felt very sorry for that agent since he was defending his wife from a drunk man who wouldn't take her 'no' seriously. Thankfully that drunk is staying in jail."
"I feel real sorry for that guy," Logan said. "Even with extra fast healing I'd hate that." He shifted in his seat. "So if we have a battle tomorrow, who's going to show up?"
"Johnny said he would," Sue said. "He and Ben are both pretty resistant to harm from ordinary means."
Logan nodded. "I hate being shot but I guess I can show up until something happens."
Steve nodded. "I'll be doing the same thing. I want to be there but I know I'll be healing."
Coulson cleared his throat. "We have arrested six different groups, with help from the FBI, that have been putting out prices on people's heads."
"I can see if we can warn others so they don't take it," Steve said. He looked at the other mutants in the meeting. "Are your people all right?"
"Mostly," one said. "One's refusing to come out of the school."
Logan's phone rang. "What?" he answered. He listened. "Crap. How sure?" He nodded once. "Great. Thanks, Summers." He hung up and looked at Coulson then at Steve. "The demon poker circuit earlier told Harris that there's a probable ascension on the next eclipse, in three weeks."
Steve winced. "Damn."
Coulson looked up the timing on that. "It looks like it's from ten-forty to ten-forty-eight on that Wednesday," he said, looking up. "Did he hear where?"
"Uptown. That's all they said when Harris asked."
Steve grimaced, rubbing his forehead. "I read those files they have for the other slayers. They're immortal for their last hundred days so they can make it through their changes."
"What's an ascension?" Sue Richards asked.
"Huge demon worm that used to be a human sorcerer," Logan said. "There were two in DC but they were handled off-camera. Stark had someone do an autopsy to find out their structures and figure out a better way than beheading or a volcano."
Sue looked at him. "Someone made a volcano?"
"By the old Council's records, one came up when Vesuvius was blowing," Logan said. "It got it instead." She shook her head, sending her husband an email so he could ask Tony Stark about those.
"There's five versions in various sizes," Steve said. "The longest is about a football field maybe." She stared at him. He nodded. "But it takes ninety years."
"So if we see someone who hasn't changed for decades we should watch them for demonic deals," she said dryly. "Has anyone checked Keith Richards?"
"Not yet," Coulson said dryly. "Though we have found a demon, hell born instead of other plane born, in a thrash metal band out of Germany that hates immigrants." She shook her head quickly. "We had a talk with him about inconsistent viewpoints and he went off on how they were weak for not being of his species."
"So he hates all humans but he's taken up with the skinheads," Steve guessed. Coulson nodded. "Charming. Have fun with that."
"I sent Melinda May to talk to him," he said with a touch of smugness. "We found out because he was hating his girlfriend for being human and enticing him. She taught him about growing up."
"Good," Logan agreed. "Before they try something we have to stop."
The others in the room nodded they agreed and got down to who was going to answer call outs for emergencies. Because it wasn't going to be the military yet again.
***
Slayer Penny's husband Brad walked up to his former commander and handed him a bottle of beer he had bought him. "I'm doing a favor for the slayers," he said quietly. The guy winced but nodded. "These are the upcoming battles that they've foreseen. It won't be all of them because they can pop up out of nowhere. On there's also the potential date of something huge and galactic sized showing up based on a few visions. With all that shit going on, they wanted you guys to know because they're not bulletproof either."
"I can pass this up, Brad. You good?"
He grinned. "My first rugrat with Penny's due in a few weeks. She's a nice girl."
"That's good. I saw you necking with one of the slayers."
Brad smirked. "Penny's real possessive of me." He walked off. "Have fun with that. I'm out unless they attack us or the house right now."
"That's a good idea. You gotta take the time to experience these life moments." He looked around then went back to his commanding officer. "From the slayers. The foreseen ones."
"Who was that?"
"Shillings. He timed out and now he's married to a slayer. They're about to pop out their first kid."
"That's good." He looked at them. "This sucks ass."
"With all the yahoos and militia sorts they can't answer," the lower commander quipped. "None of us would let them risk their lives during this problem. Even if they had body armor, and they don't."
"Fuck!" He looked at him. "I'll pass this up."
"Thanks, sir. Have fun with the Army people." He walked off drinking his new beer. If there was ever a time to drink, it was whenever the slayers asked for help.
***
Kennedy showed up at the New York house late one night, staring at the two minis who were up. "Shouldn't you two be in bed?"
"I might have to miss graduation," Miffy pouted.
"I told you you're going," Xander called from upstairs. "Go to bed before all the pictures have you looking like a zombie!" She squealed as she ran upstairs. He came down them slowly, staring at the other mini. "Slayer dream or nightmare?"
"I'm hoping it's a nightmare," she said. "Or we've got huge problems with more Bringers."
He hugged her. "We all have nightmares about them." She snuggled in. "Try to get back to sleep soon, huh? We've all got to go clap for Miffy tomorrow." She nodded, going up to her room to try to sleep. Xander stared at Kennedy. "Huge problems?"
"Meeting tomorrow."
"Miffy's graduation starts at one." He walked off. "We're out of beds so grab a couch or go use the bunkhouse that's in the lower safe room."
"Okay." She went to check on those. It was pretty decent, but not fancy. The bunk beds all had comfy mattresses. It was nice and the bathroom had all sorts of girl needs already stocked. She wrote Faith a text message about the graduation in the morning so they wouldn't interrupt. That stuff was important for the girls to have. No matter how Willow panicked and didn't want the girls to go their special events in case something huge happened.
***
Xander snuck out of his seat and grabbed someone by the back of the neck, pushing him into a chair with a glare. Then he snuck back to his seat. Miffy had noticed but was smiling again since it wasn't a huge problem. Buffy and Faith snuck in with Giles halfway through the ceremony. Miffy lit up and bounced a bit in her seat. When it came her turn they all clapped and whistled, making her blush but wave and nearly bounce over to get her kindergarten diploma then to her seat again. At the end, Xander walked up to hug Miffy, picking her up. "You did so great. We're all real proud of you, Miffy."
"Thank you, Xander." She hugged his neck. "There's my teacher."
"I remember her. She was real nice about you having to go into hiding a few times." He smiled and shook her hand. "Thank you for being such a great teacher for Miffy."
"She's a charming student, Mr. Harris." She looked at Miffy. "Remember, you have that one last assignment I need, Miffy."
"Oops. I think it's at home." She looked at Xander. "My coloring of animals thing."
"That was on the kitchen table this morning and I put it onto the top of the fridge so it couldn't get messed up by spills." He looked at Giles. Who called someone at the house to bring it. That slayer brought it and handed it over with a hug for the mini slayer. Thankfully the house was only a few blocks away.
"Thank you, Milaya."
"You're welcome, Miffy. It's a huge accomplishment to graduate an important grade like this. I'm sorry I couldn't get here in time to see the ceremony." She tweaked her nose. "And you look very cute in your robe." She went to talk to Faith.
Xander handed it over. "I hope it's done. If not, we can wait for fifteen or so if she needs to complete it."
The teacher looked it over, nodding. "She's having some problems staying inside the left side lines."
Xander looked then at her. "You color like I do since that eye's dead. Do you need glasses?"
"I don't know but they're dorky," she complained.
He kissed her on the head. "Glasses aren't dorky. Just ask all those hipsters that wear them without prescription lenses just to be wearing some. They're the beard guys too."
"Eww, they're weird," she complained. "But I guess I can get my eyes checked this summer."
"We can do it before you go back to school," he promised, smiling at the teacher. "Anything else I need to pay attention to this summer?"
"She has two mandatory reading assignments but they're a pick a book and read it sort. She should expect to have a report on what she did this summer her first few days back." She smiled at Miffy. "I'm pretty sure yours is going to be great, dear." She looked at Xander again. "But do tone it down. Her next teacher isn't all that hyper on weird things like bungee jumping and the like."
"That's a big slayer thing, not my age group," Miffy said. "We swim at the summer camp. Will we have show and tell next year?"
"Maybe now and then."
"Cool. I can show off my weaving project from camp." She hugged Xander's neck again. "Thank you for being such a great teacher, Misses Wilson."
"It's a great thing when I get charming kids like you, Miffy." She walked off to talk to the other parents.
She looked at Xander. "We need ice cream."
"You'd have to talk Giles into buying some. I bought some the other day to put up for today and it got eaten."
"Booo. That was mean." She pouted at Giles, who took her to hug. "The big slayers ate all the ice cream and we should have ice cream."
"That's okay since we picked up an ice cream cake," Faith said with a grin. "So you get both." Miffy squealed and pounced her to cuddle. "Let's go home, kiddo. Let you put that pretty dress up for the next special time." They walked off together.
Kennedy smiled. "My school didn't do that. I missed out." Miffy smiled and patted her on the arm. "But you did great, Miffy."
"Thank you, Kennedy."
"You're welcome." They went out to get into the rental cars together. "Who was that guy, Xander?"
"An agent." He looked at her. "Not a dangerous one but we didn't need that today."
"No, we didn't," she agreed. "Let me talk to him."
"No," Buffy said. "My job. If they hurt me, I'll get to see my mom again. If you get hurt, London is going to fall." She went to find that agent to talk to him. She smiled when he stopped talking to someone to stare at her. "Wondering if you're a big brother of someone."
"Uncle actually." He smiled and shook her hand. "Miss Summers, I had no idea one of yours was graduating. She was adorable."
"Miffy is. She's been talking about this for weeks now. She took three times to find the perfect dress. She was so stoked. I'm sorry if Xander got mean."
"No, he was right to make sure I didn't upset the kids. I should've changed out of agent clothes." She grinned and walked off. He looked at his sister. "I was watching over the slayers in Virginia the other day. They're a bit more bouncy but fun. They were planning how to add a roller coaster to the slayer summer camp."
"That's nice. It's good they're being protected right now." They walked off to gather her little darling, who was biting another kid. "Bobby, why are you biting him?"
"He made fun of me," he complained. "Said I should be a mutant."
The agent stared at the other boy. "There's a lot of mutants who do great things for humanity. Including Dr. McCoy, who is blue, fuzzy, and is built like a gorilla. He's on the nobel list again this year." The kid pouted and ran off to tell his mother. That mother glared at him but noticed he was wearing a badge and a gun so kept her opinion to herself.
***
Xander looked around the house when they got back. "Girls, grab the cake, some stuff, and let's go," he said quietly. They ran to do that, Faith getting the cake and Xander's go bag. They backed out and Xander called in that he had seen a blinking box. The NYPD guys were huffing when they showed up. "Underneath the main table in the living room," he said with a point. "Plus I can see one reflected in the kitchen." He pointed. "There."
They looked. "That's nasty," one said. "Gas."
Xander looked and groaned. "They changed their plans." One of the NYPD guys glared at him. "I had a vision of someone gassing the school a few of the girls go to," he said quietly.
"So they changed it to the slayer house instead of the school," one said. "Well, that's better and still bad." Xander nodded. "Give us a few more, Harris. We'll search the house and ignore all the slayer weapons unless they're armed." They did a house search and came back with another bomb. "In the safe room that's attached to the bedrooms."
"You use that to get to the new safe room," Kennedy said. "Thank you, guys. I'd hate to have to go kill someone over this." They smiled and left. Kennedy took Miffy. "Xander, go check the house for things like demon slimes?"
"Yeah, I can do that. Though I'm pretty sure they didn't do it." He went to look and came out with one extra bomb. "It was in the air vent that was open into the next building." The officers groaned. "Thank you, guys." They packed up things and left. Xander looked at the girls, who all grinned. "Okay, it's time to celebrate Miffy going up." They went to have ice cream cake.
Giles looked at him once everyone was served. "Often?" he mouthed. Xander nodded once. "Cause?" he mouthed.
Xander grinned. "Handled as of later if you'll babysit."
"Of course we can. We're having a meeting in a bit."
"Great. Should I invite anyone?"
"Should we save a piece of cake for Mr. Clint or Miss Natasha?" Miffy asked. She pulled out her phone to text them. "Mr. Clint said he's coming over but we don't need to save him a piece of cake. He had burgers just an hour ago and he can't eat like a slayer." The girls grinned at her for that and they dug in again. "Xander, can we paint our rooms?"
"Later this summer. Once we're sure it's all safe."
"Okay. Let us know so we can pick colors." He nodded, patting her on the head. She dug in again. "Are we doing camp this summer?"
"Yes," Giles said. "We think it'll be great this summer, Miffy."
"Cool!" She dug in again. She looked at Xander while she chewed. "Why didn't we hear about that vision with the school?"
"Because I was handling it so you girls didn't have to worry," Xander said. "They weren't going to manage it and I told the school."
"Oh, okay." She relaxed again. "Can we have a sleepover with all the minis in a few days?"
Xander nodded. "The older girls have school until next Thursday so we can plan it after that," he promised. "You guys need to invite them and make up lists so I can shop." They nodded and dug in, making a list of which minis to bring. Xander grinned at one name. "She invited all her siblings to the infirmary to cuddle me and nag me," he told them. The girls giggled. "She and Di are great at it. Plus they have a baby slayer as a half sibling too. She's only about a year old. Bethy and Di barged in to get used to her and to tell her mom what was going on before even we could."
"Wow," Buffy said. "They're proactive."
"They've got a mailing list and play dates for the whole family of half siblings," Xander told her. "Some had groupie mommas. Some had HYDRA mommas. A few were from the dad directly. The kids all get along pretty well. Bethy made sure of it with Di."
Buffy gaped. "That's a lot of kids."
Xander nodded. "I woke up and they had taken over my bed and my chest. I had to flip onto my side to give them most of the bed. Bethy even brought the baby."
"Good, it kept me from nagging," Buffy said with a smirk.
"I was wearing my bulletproof vest," he told her.
"Uh-huh."
"He would've died."
"That's important I guess but what battle did you have that you got out of a hospital bed for?"
"I had malaria and there was a battle that couldn't be handled so they came to get me and bring me there, then nicely took me to another hospital afterward. I was sweating for a whole lot of reasons and really dizzy but we handled it."
Faith gaped. "You did what?" she demanded.
"He did a lot of what," Kennedy quipped. "According to the local community, there was a ton of 'what' going on down there." Xander shrugged but winced at the movement. "Pulling?" she quipped.
"Slightly. I can handle it. I've had worse."
"If I find out, I'm going to kick your ass and make you retire to an island full of your sort of dates."
"Where did you find an island full of bad guys?" Miffy asked, staring at her with her eyes wide.
Buffy smiled. "If I have to, I'll have one made so he can retire."
"We'd have to move down there to help him," another of the girls said dryly. "That way we don't have to put up with idiots helping. Not Mr. Clint. He's *really* good. His whole team is *really* good. Most of the mutant teams in the area are." Kara smirked and nodded. "But there's some wannabe hunters and heros that're pitiful and need a lot of work."
"We've seen a few of those at the main house," Faith agreed. "After a few times at sparring practice they gave up." She heard someone outside and went to figure out who it was. She grabbed Clint. "Miffy and the girls said you're one of the few that they find worthy to work with them during things. So thanks for protecting our girls." She grinned.
He stared at her. "They did?"
Xander poked a girl and pointed with his spoon. She sighed. "You didn't hear all of it. I excluded you and your whole team as being competent and more than good enough to work with us during things. I was talking about the wannabe hunters that we get now and then."
"Oh, yeah, them," he said with a nod and a grin. "I wasn't upset. Natasha just texted with a problem."
"Is it the ascension coming up in a few weeks?" Xander asked. "Or should I go protect a mutant kid orphanage again?" Buffy swatted him. He glared at her. "Not the first one."
"You're still injured, Xander."
"Yeah, not that much."
Clint stared at him. "You got shot in the shoulder."
Xander nodded. "The last time I got shot twice in the leg." He shrugged. "Egypt's problem was a crap shot and their torturing little asswipes weren't any better." The girls hugged him. "I'm good, girls. It's okay."
"Bullsnot," Miffy said with a grin. "You need cuddles to heal." She hauled Clint over. "There's a tiny little piece of cake left," she said with a grin. "We were about to fight over it but you can have it because you were so good to us when people were being butts."
He grinned. "Thanks, Miffy, and you look adorable." She beamed and nodded. He got that tiny sliver of ice cream cake and sat down. "Natasha said that someone did try to gas attack one of the safety centers."
"They pulled all the hissy things out of here when we got back," Miffy said. "No one told us they were going to try the school but they had to change it because we were making sure they weren't going to get us."
Clint hugged her. "We made sure that they wouldn't."
She smirked at him. "They never told us."
"Nope, because you're a kid and you had more things to worry about, like graduation." He took her picture and sent it to Natasha. "Natasha wanted one." She wiggled and grinned, digging in again. "Bethy's back with Diana and the twins," he told Xander.
"I barely know anything about the twins," Xander said. "They're cute but I haven't done more than nod at them a few times. Bethy's very overprotective so which one is she guarding?"
"Her aunt we think. They've been hanging on her to learn girl things. Which Wanda doesn't know real well yet so they're all learning how to braid hair from Stark today."
"I can't imagine him with hair he'd have to braid," Buffy quipped with a grin for Clint. "He'd look weird with the long hair."
Clint shook his head quickly. "I'm pretty sure Pepper taught him."
"Maybe," Faith agreed. They let the girls go play upstairs while they cleaned up. Faith found a missing spoon, getting a grin from Xander when she handed it over. "I didn't even think about it."
"The other one got knocked under the fridge. They drove me nuts trying not to think about losing a spoon before school. *Way* too early."
"Xander, is my guy okay?" Kara called. "He's not answering his phone."
Xander looked up at the ceiling. "That's not nice, Kara, and no. There's some sort of tiny battle."
"Fuck!" She ran down the stairs and to the armory, then used her new thing from Tara that would take her to her boyfriend's side. She dove into the battle, beating the living shit out of the demons attacking them. "How dare you touch my man!" she growled. The demons ran and the few mutants with them were grinning at her but not trying to attack her. She huffed and walked back, looking up at her guy. "Let's get you cleaned up, big guy. You're bruised."
"I'm fine."
She stared at him. "Really?" He scowled. She picked up his wrist and dragged him off, taking him to clean up his injuries. "If you can fuss over mine I can fuss over yours," she quipped. "My fussing skills are getting rusty since Xander won't let us fuss over his gunshot wound. That and I have to blow off some steam because we came home from Miffy's graduation to find bombs in the house. Again."
"They were going to blow up the slayers?" he demanded.
She looked up and nodded. "Yup, again."
He huffed. "Are they all right?"
"They're good. They're all having ice cream cake to celebrate with Miffy."
"Someone named their kid Miffy?" another mutant asked, looking disgusted.
Kara glared at him. "The minis use nicknames so they're harder to find among the normals. Slayers aren't allowed to become mythical until we can start patrolling at eighteen."
"Oh."
She hauled her boyfriend to a seat and pushed him into it then grabbed the first aid kit that was already sitting out. He pouted but she cleaned them up then kissed him. He stared at her. She grinned. "Xander vowed to go help protect somewhere and I'm not allowed to yell at him," she complained.
He hugged her. "Someday you'll have someone to fuss over, Kara."
"Hmm, not likely. Only half the slayers are fertile and I'm not one." He pulled back to look at her. She shrugged. "Something to do with the calling. In some of us it took harder than others. In me it took really hard." She shrugged again. "I heard about that from Faith and asked. The doc I saw wasn't amused but he was really sorry to tell me that my ovaries don't have anything on them. So I've got hormones and all but no eggs. So no kids unless you want to adopt."
He blinked. "I was worried about my mutation passing on," he admitted.
She kissed him and grinned. "I think they'd be cute little babies and if you really want we'll talk about how you can have one that I'll be a great mom for. There's all sorts of methods. And some day we can talk about adopting some of the orphans." He hugged her hard. She kissed him on the ear. "Is that why you've been a dick for the last few days?" He nodded. "I'll forgive it this time but next time I'm going to torture you by tickling you and giving you fleas from some of those strays we always run into in the park." He laughed, giving her an extra squeeze. She grinned at him. "We should make sure no one else needs cleaned up."
"That's Fuzzy's job," Logan said as he walked behind them. "No making out in the kitchen."
Kara looked at him with an evil smirk. "The last time we made out in the tv room we were a living sex ed lesson that got us scowled at by you and others."
He shook his head with a grunt. "He's got a room, Kara."
She grinned. "I know. He complains he usually has to pick it up but it's still cleaner than mine is usually."
Piotr shook his head with a sigh. His girlfriend so was goofy sometimes. "We will go for a walk around the pond."
"Okay. If that's what you wanna do," she agreed. "I'm having a happy day. Miffy's graduation was cool. No one tried to interrupt and the only bigoted ass was a parent afterward who didn't want to say anything near the agent that got there late so Xander made sure he wasn't a threat by not being violent for a change."
"He didn't hit them?"
"No. Shoved him into a seat and left him there with a dirty look." She looked up. "Buffy, Faith, and Giles got there a bit late but they showed up for it too. Miffy was bouncing so hard when she got her certificate."
"High school graduation?" Jean Gray asked as she walked past them.
"Kindergarten."
"Aww." She went inside to get the first aid kit for Scott. She spotted Logan watching the couple. "Are you worried about them?"
"No. They're great together. They protect each other. I'm more worried that some of the idiots we deal with will try for one of them to get the other and Harris will end up blowing them up."
"He will?" she demanded.
Logan smirked but nodded as he walked off. "To protect his slayers? Yeah, he has before. He also led a demon to a militia's camp to make it take them out instead of a school. They hate him down there sometimes." He went to the tv lounge. The kids were still in lockdown so he had the whole room to himself. He could ignore all giggling going on from that couple.
Jean and Scott came back, her dropping the first aid kit back onto the counter. Scott smiled but left them alone. Jean sat down to be nosy. "So how did you two meet?" she asked.
Kara smiled at her. "We were penpals for about six months when I moved to the New York house. Then after a battle Piotr walked up to Xander to see if I was all right because I hadn't had time to answer an email in about a day. Xander brought him back to the house and we hit it off really well. We've been roller blading and all sorts of fun things together, including his friends here more than once. We're really cute together and Xander said it's good even if he wants to bum a couch now and then in the house. He appreciates having other guys around."
Jean nodded. "That's sweet. Have you two thought about later things? Like maybe more than dating?"
Kara shrugged, looking at her guy, who shrugged back. "We're satisfied for now," Piotr said.
"That's sweet, kids." She smiled. "What about future kids?"
"Half of all slayers are infertile," Kara said, realizing who had put that little bug into her man's ear. "If and when he wants one from his own loins, he'll be a big guy and come talk to me about it so we can work out how. If that's before or after we adopt some of the orphans that seem to linger on the edges of the mutant community, or an orphaned slayer, then it'll work itself out."
Jean nodded. "That's a good thing. A lot of people don't want to adopt."
Kara nodded. "We know. A lot of the minis don't have families anymore thanks to the First Evil's minions. Only a few of them have been adopted by someone, and half of them their farther family members didn't want that risk so left them in the system until Xander and Andrew brought up that problem with Giles. Now we've got two houses with orphans and we do a lot of outreach with the minis so we know they're safe and well taken care of. We've only had to take one from her parents and that's because they were jackasses of an order of magnitude. Andrew said even Xander's parents weren't that stupid of humans." Her boyfriend gave her a squeeze so she smiled at him. "You've met Miffy."
"I have. She's sweet."
"Her mom got killed by her stepfather and then he tried to auction her off to whichever researcher wanted to pay the most for her. That's why we have custody of Miffy. Her dad...well I'm told Andrew pulled out robots to beat him nearly to death before the robot dropped him at the police station." She grinned. "Xander sent him candies for doing that job for him. Xander was apparently fighting in Mozambique again that week."
He kissed her. "Xander is quite the parent because he can put up with all you girls shopping at once."
She laughed. "He doesn't go into a mall with us. He'll drive us, drop us off, then go hide in a fast food place for a bit. Buffy broke him with the shopping stuff. She used to drag him around as her shopping buddy and approval committee. He *hates* shopping. Which is why he's only got five outfits and we give him clothes for present holidays."
He grinned. "That could be handy."
"Yeah. Some of his ex's did but they give things like leather pants." He blushed. She kissed him. "I think it's cute that you blush." She winked. "Did you finish that sculpture? You promised I could see it first."
"TNW saw it first because she interrupted but she giggled and said that art must be fascinating. She just saw pretty things."
"I usually do but I still have a fondness for Degas' dancers." They went up to his room to see his newest artworks.
Jean shook her head. "She's really strong." She looked at the lurking Professor Xavier.
"She is," he agreed. "We had some reservations about them being together but her watcher isn't upset by it and told me to leave them be. So far they've been good for each other. Even if I don't really like his focus being split from his schoolwork and training."
Kara jogged around him and out back. "That's because you hate us slayers anyway. You don't need to be a telepath to see that." She pounced someone. "Hi," she said with a smile. "Xander told me about you. So why're you here?"
"Let go and get off me," he growled. She hip tossed him. He hopped up. She stared at him then he sniffed her. "You're a slayer."
"I'm also a girlfriend of someone inside so I'll be staking your ass if you upset him." She stared at him. "So, good reason to show up? Someone call Logan," she called, not looking away from him. Logan came jogging out. "He thinks I'm sweet and fluffy, Logan."
Logan snorted. "I've seen you take down demons that were five times your height by hand, Kara. You're not sweet to anything but your guy." He looked at Sabertooth. "You didn't try to claw her for that?"
"I'm not against pretty girls pouncing me," he said, leering at her.
"Eyes up here," she said with a point. "The boobs are only for metal guys with tender hearts. You're not metallic, sweet, tender, or into art. You're not my type so quit staring at the boobs."
Sabertooth burst out laughing. "You're mouthy."
"And dangerous," she reminded him, flipping her knife into her hand. "Are you going to make me prove it?"
"She's cute," Sabertooth told Logan. "You're letting the girly protect you now?" Logan extended a claw, his middle one. Then Sabertooth had to yelp when something fiery hit his back.
The slayer walked around the guy rolling around to put out the fire. "Hi," she said with a smile. "I'm Buffy, the senior slayer." She waved a bit. "Nice to meet you." She looked at Kara. "Tara sent me to help you and to talk to you guys about the upcoming ascension. We're pretty sure it's a mutant with magic skills."
"I can introduce you to the other head guys," Kara quipped. "Two are telepaths."
"That's fine," Buffy agreed. Sabertooth got up with a growl to attack her. She kicked him back and attacked, making him fight harder. "Wow, I need practice. You're good at it though."
Willow appeared and ran over. "Buffy, I can spell him harmless."
"Leave him be," Logan ordered. "That's evil, Rosenburg. Unlike your buddies, I'll end you for that level of evil." He hauled Buffy off and tossed her at Kara, who caught her. "Go inside, ladies. Rosenburg, shoo." He pointed. She huffed but disappeared.
Buffy straightened herself out, smirking at the hairy guy. "You're not bad but you need a shave. Then you might even be handsome and my type. Pity about the yeti fur. Let me know if you get that cured." She and Kara walked inside. She smiled. "Professor, it's been a while," she said, shaking his hand. "We just found out the possible ascension battle is a semi-prominent mutant."
"Oh, dear," he said. "Do you need medical attention?"
"Why would I? I've had worse sparring with Xander." She smiled. "He's cute and fun but too hairy to be mine."
"He's also an evil mutant," the Professor said.
Buffy shrugged. "Everyone's got evil times. Look at Willow and most of my ex's." Kara walked off giggling. "No commenting from the peanut gallery," she called after her.
"Sure, I won't mention Angel at all," she quipped then hurried upstairs.
Buffy rolled her eyes. "Angel wasn't *totally* bad. Just when he lost his soul for a bit. And before it got installed I guess."
The Professor and Jean both got a view of Angel from her mind and they both shook their heads. "Maybe she could civilize him," Jean said, walking off. "Tell me who so I can go pull up his files," she said, looking at Buffy. She handed over the note she had from Xander's poker buddies. "Oh, him. Charming." She went to do that.
The Professor looked at her. "You are a most unique young woman, Buffy."
"No, there's many slayers but most of them don't like dangerous guys like I do." She smiled. "Xander warns them away from it so I have a larger playing field."
He nodded a few times. "Sometimes that can be useful. Let's go to my study to talk about this person and his ideas."
"We think he's doing one of those mini versions. He should only be about fifty or so feet." She followed him to his study.
Upstairs, Kara was helping her buddy escape for the day. They needed to get away from Buffy before she hit on someone and gave them bad ideas.
Outside, Logan looked at Sabertooth. "She's spunky," he said dryly. "Thank your boss for the statement helping with that stupid law."
"He sent me to deliver a message." He held it up. "It might be poisoned."
"I can see why. A few of us thought someone here should've said something sooner." He took it. "If you show up in Cleveland, she might flirt with you again." He walked off. "Have a better night."
"If I show up in Cleveland, we're not sparring that way," he said dryly. He left, going back to their temporary camp. Maybe he'd look her up later. She was spunky and he could appreciate that when he broke her.
Remy Lebeau walked past the duo sneaking out. "Remy will drive you," he said. "On Remy's way to the bar so he doesn't have to see cher flirting with Sabertooth."
"Are they flirting again?" Kara asked with a grin. "He is her type. Predatory, dangerous, kinda evil." She shrugged. "He's still probably better than the two master vampires she dated."
"Remy doesn't need to know," he said firmly. "Remy does not need those thoughts."
"Us too. We all run from Buffy talking about her love life." They fled together, him to go to the bar, Kara and Piotr to go to the park to hang out.
TBC...
Kiddy Things.