The Imperfect Son. by Voracity2

The Imperfect Son.

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Xander hung up and looked at the phone then at his father. "I'm kinda proud she found a way to do that. She bypassed three different apocalypse attempts by doing it."

"I'm a bit scared of that mind," Tommy said, patting his son on the shoulder. "Let's go meet your little sisters." Xander nodded, going with him to the hanger. "I'm really impressed with her problem solving," he told Buckaroo. "How old is she?"

"Nine."

"We'll make sure she gets a good education," Buckaroo said. "Including in self defense. That way she makes it as long as she possibly can." Xander nodded and buckled himself into his seat. Buckaroo flew them to DC and they landed just under two hours later. Then a short drive to the white house thanks to one of the local chapter of Blue Blazer Irregulars. "Thanks," he said with a grin.

"Is it another alien invasion?"

"Possibly some harmless demons," Xander said. "And my slayers." The guy stared at him, mouth open. Xander nodded. "They were problem solving." He got out after a grin and handing over gas money. "That way you're not short of gas later."

"Thanks, kid." He looked at Buckaroo.

"That's Tommy's son Alex."

"Wow."

"Often." He walked off behind the other two. The guards got Nessie into the office after they were shown in.

Nessie ran in and hugged him. "Mr. Xander." She sniffed him. "You smell like guy shampoo again. That's good." She cuddled into his arms. "Are you better yet?"

"I'm still healing. I have a lot of stitches but they're okay."

"Are you sure? I'll get down."

"You can cuddle. I never mind you girls cuddling when you need one." He cuddled her. "Did you apologize for bursting into the white house?"

"Yes, sir." She looked over his shoulder. "I'm sorry I disrupted things today. I didn't mean to appear to be a bad girl or be demanding or anything. I just really needed Mr. Xander back."

"I understand fully. You're young. He's important in your life."

"I'm her trainer and all-but big brother," Xander said. He kissed her on the head, turning some. "This is my dad."

"Wow, you're really pretty." She grinned. "I'm Nessie." She held out a hand. "I'm one of his mini slayers."

"I'm Tommy. It's a pleasure to meet you, Nessie." She grinned and snuggled in again. Cyndra ran in and pounced Xander to cuddle too. "Hi," he said when this one looked at him. "I'm Xander's dad."

"I'm Cyndra. I'm one of the two oldest minis." She waved. "Xander."

"Shh. I have you. Wasn't Gabriel helping enough?"

"No," they said. "We wanted you back."

Nessie pulled back. "Even though you left because of the bad big slayers who can't appreciate you and make fun of you, we still adore you and need you and love you like a big brother. We need you more than them and we can beat up the big slayers for being sheep girl parts again." Tommy cracked a laugh at that. "They can be. Or maybe cow ones. Some of them are more like cows than sheep. One's kind of like a dog's girl parts, because she's a bit more mean as a hunter, but she's still too mean."

Xander looked at her. "Why sheep?"

"Sheep are cheap and eat anything. They'll sleep with nearly anything that looks like them too. Cows are more picky and can bite back if their bull isn't to their liking. They're girl parts of them because that's all they think with." The president and Buckaroo were trying not to laugh at that certainty.

Cyndra nodded. "Faith is more like a hunting dog. She's sightly picky but she knows her prey. Buffy's a sheep. She may lead the slayers but she follows a lot of things."

"Including fashion," Xander said, staring at her when she stomped in. "What are you wearing?"

"Clothes," she growled. "Why are you wearing pink?"

"Dad's color." He pointed at him. "Dad, this is Buffy." He doubted Buffy remembered from the other night.

She looked at him. "Hi."

"Hi." He shook her hand instead of punching her in the nose. He was proud of himself. "Any idea how she merged the realms?"

"There's still some separation," Gabriel said as he walked in with Willow, who was in handcuffs. "She tried to spell the guards," he said at Buckaroo's look.

"That's a bad thing," he agreed. "Sit, Xander. You're still healing." He sat on the couch with the girls. "Nessie?" She looked up. "How did the demon you talked to do this?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. He said he had to talk to his higher ups."

Xander looked at Gabriel. "No clue," he admitted. "My powers wouldn't let me. There's seven things holding them apart. It has stopped all three of those apocalypse battles."

Xander nodded, looking at her. "We'll be discussing this plan." She nodded with a sigh, putting her head back down on his shoulder. He looked at Buckaroo then at Gabriel. "What's holding it apart?"

"Most of them seem to be safe haven spots. Five of them are."

"So, the one in Switzerland, the one in Paris, the one in Guyana, the one in Panama, and the one in Thailand?" Xander guessed.

"Not Thailand. That one's empty. It got attacked last month."

"Same battles?" He nodded. "They stop them?"

"Yup. They got staked out for the sea monster sort. It's under Hanoi now. Panama shifted theirs a bit to another cave system. They were getting known by the normals."

Xander nodded. "I knew that was going to be an ongoing problem, especially with the demon outing after the invasion of LA."

"Not our fault," Buffy said. "We just fought it. That was their plan to take over the world."

Xander nodded. "I remember hearing."

"You were the designated survivor. Quit nagging."

"Did I say anything about it?" he asked dryly.

"Kids," Tommy ordered. Xander nodded, calming himself down.

Nessie looked at him. "You were handling the pirates that wanted my mom and made her lose sense anyway." She put her head back down.

"I did, yeah. And two other higher demons that thought we were too scattered in the aftermath."

"No you didn't," Willow snorted.

"Yes he did," Nessie said, glaring at her. "I was there. I saw him doing it. You were hiding in a closet from press people. We still had work to do. He had to save me and my mom. Twice." She put her head back down. "That's why she lost her mind."

"Yeah, that trauma did make her go a bit different," Xander agreed. His father was staring at him. "What?" he asked, looking worried. "I had to handle it. They were bothering people."

"I was hoping the pirate story would be pirates like on that movie, not like Somali pirates."

"Ivory Coast pirates," Xander said with a grin.

"Still the same," Buckaroo said.

Buffy was staring at him. "Why did you do that?"

"Because they had one of the slayers hostage with the others they were treating as ransom and slaves," he told her. "Did you want me to let them keep her?"

"No, but you're a normal guy, Xander. You can't do that."

"I just blew them up, Buffy. I only had to get into one fight." She stared at him. He shrugged and grinned. "Someone has to protect the minis."

"But...you're normal, Xander."

"I had weapons. It happens. Ask the guys. Military guys can do the same thing."

"That possession."

"On. The. Job. Training," he shot back, staring her down. "I learned a lot." She slumped, glaring at him.

Nessie looked over. "Quit acting like a sheep's girl parts, Buffy. He does what he has to do, the same as we do and those hunter sorts he heard about do."

"True," Gabriel said. "I'm just glad I'm not his guardian angel." He looked at Xander. "Can we work out something to cancel that last life debt?"

"Not yet. I haven't figured it out yet. Or Castiel's."

"Crap," he muttered.

"But you can go check on the hunters, make sure they're okay and know that their apocalypse is going to be a lot more low key and you can give Dean my C-4 stash for the next time one of them ends up on another dimension."

"I...actually, that might work," Gabriel said, disappearing to talk to Castiel. He got glared at. "One of the mini slayers did it. It not only countered all three apocalypse attempts going on, but meant she got Xander back."

"Three?" Dean demanded. "What three?"

"Yours, the one in Eurasia, and the one in Asia that's a demonic mafia trying to push against the demonic protector society. Xander had started that one easing but the demonic Yakuza is pushing their luck. The one in Eurasia is really huge. Two huge demons trying to mate and make new tunnels. Pretty soon it'll be sinking Siberia and parts of eastern Europe." Sam groaned, holding his head. "Vision?"

"Headache." Sam looked at him. "Can we kill those two?"

"I'm not sure if they're helpful in any way but if you want to drag big weapons underground and then sink in some of the tunnels, sure."

Sam shook his head, looking at Dean.

"It's over there. I'm only worrying about it if it happens in the Midwest," Dean told him. "Russia's not my hunting area."

"Good point. Is there one, Gabriel?"

He looked and shrugged. "Don't know. I see some tunnels but I'm not sure if they're still here or not." He found Dean's phone and sent a text message to Xander. He got one back. "There had been one but it got driven out by the Native Americans. It went to lower Mexico and was one of the snake gods they worshiped back then," he read. "It's sleeping. Let it." He put the phone back on the table. "So not totally." Sam took the phone to save that number down.

Dean nodded, getting up to get them a beer. Sam took his with a sigh of relief. "Demonic Yakuza in the US?" Dean asked.

"Northwest. Some in Canada. A few in LA but they're not gaining any ground. The gangs there are really mean. They're trying in each big city but the local gangs aren't giving up yet. You shouldn't have to worry about it unless they take over Detroit when all the other gangs leave."

"Good," Sam said, clinking bottles with Dean. They both drank and got back to their research. "What's holding the two realms apart?"

"Five demon protection enclaves for the sort that the slayers would handle if they were dangerous, which they're mostly not. Two special ritual areas." That got a nod. "Rosenburg could probably reseparate them but she's in a snit. She got arrested by the Secret Service for trying to go after them with a spell." Dean winced. "Nessie's adorable. She called Buffy a sheep's cunt." Sam choked on his current sip of beer because he was laughing. "Called Faith a dog's cunt because she's a better hunter." Sam put down his beer and laughed into his book. "I don't really like kids but that one's great. She's nine."

Dean nodded. "Dad would've beaten us."

"Xander and she are talking about responsible plans and about how this could hurt others. We had that talk earlier. His dad's taken it over," he said, looking toward DC. "He's good. He's making her understand it." He nodded. "The slayers need that sort of help." He caught Castiel when he was flung at them. "The higher ups complaining?"

"Quite." He straightened himself out. "They do not believe a child did this."

"She did. She's nine. Nessie's a pisser." He grinned. "Are they going to keep going?"

"They're going to try to separate us by removing those blocks."

"That'll stick us together and they're mostly peaceful species protected areas." Castiel gave him a look. "I've had enough. You?" He nodded. "Go get Xander, see where his stash is, and let's handle this."

"I can do that." Gabriel sent him off. "Give us a few minutes." He followed once Xander had his stash open. Gabriel looked and blinked. "Wow."

Xander grinned. "Kinda handy when you find pirates with stuff." He picked up three things and then a case. He handed that one to Castiel. "Don't open it." He nodded. "Let's go, Gabriel." They left. Xander set off the first few things, taking out most of the angelic war council. Then he tossed the last one, breaking the case. "We need to go now." They looked at the screaming bodies and left. Xander grinned. "There's two more of those in the warehouse, Gabriel."

"I know just the demons that need it," he said, going to get those. He could use Xander's example. A few demons fled but he'd get them later if they were still causing troubles. He left before the contents of that case got to him. Xander was back at the White House being fussed at so he went there. "There are no more plans from angels to ruin those protected areas holding the realities apart. Or the other side." Buffy gaped in horror. He stared at her. "Not like I want innocent beings who are only guilty of being born on another realm or dimension to be punished for existing. Most of them aren't harmful." He looked at Xander. "I left you one."

"Thanks." He grinned. "That's the slayer's apocalypse closet."

He nodded. "It's a good thing." He disappeared. The two mini slayers were fussing over him with his father.

"Guys, I'm okay. It's just blow back from the weapons."

"How did you get weapons like that?" one of the Secret Service guards asked.

"Pirates. They had them casually laying around. I wasn't going to let others have them. The slayers sometimes need them. It seemed reasonable at the time."

"We'd like an inventory and perhaps oversight if they stay," the guard said.

"We can talk about that with Giles."

"Thank you, Mr. Harris. Or...."

"No clue which one I'm going with." That got a nod.

"Use yours, kid," Tommy said, staring at him. "I don't use mine. It's hard to spell."

Xander grinned. "I noticed that way back when, Dad." Tommy smirked at him. "You sure?"

"When you get married, take your spouse's name," Buckaroo said.

"Still sterile thanks to the whole snatching me across realities thing, and then fish taint."

"I did a scan while we had you down. We can fix that," Buckaroo said with a grin for Tommy.

"I already have grandkids. Let him find a decent lover to date to give me later ones."

"He's bi," Buffy snorted. "That would take Willow."

"We know other witches," Tommy said with a shrug then smirked at her. "Don't worry. Some day you'll almost attain my level of perfectness." He looked at his son, who shrugged.

"I know I'm not perfect, Dad. I'm really good, really dangerous, and kinda hot to the right sort, but not perfect."

He patted him on the head. "I don't expect you to be perfect but I am fixing your wardrobe."

"I managed to make Hawaiian shirts look good, Dad."

"Yes but you don't match them right. We can work on that." Xander grinned, wiggling some. The girls giggled. Buffy just groaned. "He's his own man. It's a good thing for him to find himself and his own point of zen."

"I'm usually working on weapons when I reach that state," Xander admitted.

Buckaroo stared at him. "Really?" He nodded. "Like sharpening things?"

"Or carving stakes. Simple rhythmic activities but with weapons. Someone had me try weaving and it didn't fit as well."

"Interesting. Guns?"

"Not as deep. You have to do more than swipe."

"We can help you get there soon. Maybe some tai chi to." Xander nodded. "The girls?"

"They're learning how to brawl at the moment."

"We can help with that too. I'm an excellent teacher and conveniently off rotation for the next three months for vacation."

"You need a vacation," Xander said firmly. "You're advanced training to what I'm giving them. Go somewhere nice and calm."

"I already did that and got bored after two weeks of no books." He shrugged. The president cleared his throat. "The results of the scans you had NASA do for me haven't come in yet?"

"Not yet. Why don't you take them to your place so they can rest. You can get back with me tomorrow?"

"I can do that, sir." He looked at Tommy then at Buffy. "Are you coming with us or are you going back to the other slayers?"

"I'm going back to the main council building. We need to figure out how to handle and arrange things."

"Tell Giles I'm okay."

"You have seventy-two stitches," Tommy said. "You're not 'okay' yet."

"We get that from him because we nag when he's hurt."

"You take on the thing with ninety-three arms and five claws on each arm," Xander said.

"We used a crossbow," she said smugly.

"Yeah, and it got back up after you were gone," Xander shot back. "Because it's immune from all puncturing weapons. You have to rip off a few specific arms and then bust open the inner ball." She slumped, staring at him. He grinned. "It's hard but not impossible. You just get scratched a whole lot."

"I'll tell Giles that." She looked at the guards. "Can I have Willow?"

"No. She tried to cast a spell on the guards around the President and possibly on the leader of the free world, Miss Summers. We're keeping her for a while until we can talk to her oversight committee about what she needs to do to never try that again."

"I'll tell Giles. He's over all of us." She sighed. "How am I getting home?"

Xander called someone. "It's me. Buffy's at the white house and needs to go back to Cleveland. Thank you. She's in jail. She tried to cast spells on the white house." He hung up on the gasping. "Misty." Buffy nodded and disappeared.

"How do we stop that from happening?" the guard asked Xander.

He shrugged. "I don't do that sort of magic. I'm a shaman, not a witch. Ask Giles."

"I can do that. We can have a great conference." Xander grinned. "Is he there?"

"He should be. He usually is but a few times a year he heads back to England."

"That's fine. We can find him. You guys have a good trip back." They nodded and walked out with the two girls. He looked at the president. "She's very polite. He's done a good job balancing the warrior with a normal life and being a strong woman."

"He has. I can see why they wanted him back." He grinned. "Buckaroo's not going to be bored for a long time."

"Probably not, sir," he agreed. He went to make a report to his boss. Who was having fits about Rosenburg. He waited until he had to catch his breath to step in and finish the report.

***

Buckaroo walked in first, holding up a hand. "Two of Xander's mini slayers are with us, guys." New Jersey looked over at them. Xander was carrying Nessie and Cyndra was yawning but waved at them. "The little one is Nessie. The other is Cyndra. They're young slayers." They nodded. "Let's get them up to Xander's room."

"Dinner?" Cyndra asked, blinking at him. "Xander can cook for us if he can go shopping."

He smiled at her. "We have a bunkhouse cafeteria, Cyndra. He doesn't have to cook."

"Okay. That'll be great. Nessie needs to eat soon. She's growing."

"You both need to eat." He led them to get dinner. And making Alex eat after he took his antibiotics. New Jersey came in to look at the kids. "They're good. No injuries I could see."

"That's wonderful."

"I don't let the minis fight," Xander said. "Unless they're being attacked they're not to fight. You can't even fall in for apocalypse battles until you're at least sixteen and passed most of your training." Cyndra nodded, eating another bite of spaghetti. "She's only a quarter of the way through it because until she's reached womanhood status I don't let them seriously train in more than self defense and minor 'this is how you handle it' verbal lessons."

"There's a lot of book stuff," Nessie said then smiled at him. "Who're you? I'm Nessie. I'm nine."

"I'm called New Jersey," he said, shaking her hand with a smile. "I'm a surgeon and one of the guys here."

"That's nice. What's a surgeon?" she asked Xander.

"A doctor that operates on you when you have internal injuries."

"Oh." She smiled at him. "That must be really hard."

"It is, and a lot of school, but you're very smart so you could do that if you want."

She laughed as she swatted him on the arm. "Girls don't do that stuff."

"They do here in the US."

"Really?" she asked Xander, who nodded. "Huh. Can I do that?"

"If you want to. You'll decide what you want to do when you're older and ready to go to college."

"Does that mean I'll have college patrols?"

"Yup. And maybe a few hunts in the clubs but I wouldn't let you go out like Buffy does."

"That's good. She really is like a sheep's girl parts and she was wearing really nasty clothes that showed way too much skin. Even my mother would've had a fit."

"We heard she finally agreed to put on clothes again," Xander said.

"That's cool. She needs to finish healing from what those pirates did when they broke her head." She looked at New Jersey. "Do surgeons handle that?"

"Not always. Not unless when they broke her head she needed one to go in to fix an injury."

Xander shook his head. "Mental. She had a complete break with reality during it. Came out thinking she was the African version of a dryad. It took us six months to get her out of the trees. Almost three years to put on clothes again."

"Then there's other doctors for that," New Jersey told her.

"Wow. That's a lot of doctors."

"Yes there are," Xander agreed. "Eat."

"It's rude to eat and talk at the same time."

"It is but he'll get dinner and come sit with us."

"Okay. You hurry back."

"I can do that." He grinned, going to get dinner and come back. The girls asked him all sorts of questions about US things they had heard about. By the time they were nearly asleep, Xander was done eating and New Jersey had to help him get Cyndra upstairs since Tommy was talking with Buckaroo about how to handle things. Xander got them tucked into his bed and made up the couch so he could nap. New Jersey checked his injuries then let them all rest. He went to the meeting. "The girls are in Xander's bed, he's on his couch, the injuries are healing nicely, and the infection seems to be clearing up."

"That's good," Tommy said. "It looks like I may have granddaughters."

"They have families, they told me about them, but out of the nine minis he's got under the age of womanhood, six are with foster families." He sat down. "The girls are sweet and he's done a good job keeping it from overwhelming them. He's done a lot of book work with them. He's taught them English and Latin."

"My son speaks Latin?" Tommy asked.

"He reads it." He grinned. "Nessie bragged he spoke four languages and read more than that."

"Huh. He never told me that."

Buckaroo nodded. "Or me. He still thinks he's bad in school."

"I think that was the school. Why didn't he use whatever weapons on it?"

"They blew it up once and now it's gone."

"I forgot." He shifted, crossing his feet. "How am I going to handle girls?"

"What would you have done if Alex was a daughter?" New Jersey asked.

"Put her in self defense as soon as she could walk and teach her how to dress, the same as I did him. She'd get other girlish lessons from someone like Mrs. Johnson." The guys smiled at him. "She'd never be a girl that anyone thought was weak but she'd be pretty and a good dresser."

"I think Buffy tried," Buckaroo said. Tommy snorted. "It was a fashionable outfit."

"She still looked like a club girl during the daytime. My daughter would never do that."

"Your son seems to appreciate jeans and t-shirts," New Jersey said.

Tommy nodded. "I don't mind that. He's used to being in the field, getting dirty, getting sweaty. We can make sure he matches better. And get him a haircut since today interrupted that plan." Buckaroo smiled at him for that. He shrugged. "He needs a haircut."

"Nessie said she used to help braid his hair for him."

"He told me the girls did that sometimes. What about the other girls?"

"If he needs to bring them here, we'll help him set up a house on the grounds," Buckaroo said. "That way they've got some privacy and the guys don't have to feel awkward about having girls running around." That got a nod. "Best of both worlds for you, Tommy."

"It'd be great. He's good with them. They really look up to them."

"They do. Half of what we talked about over dinner was what Xander had taught them," New Jersey said.

Buckaroo smiled. "They're charming little girls." The others nodded. "We'll handle it as it comes." They got up and went to their rooms. Tommy peeked in on the girls and his son then went to his own bed to lay there and think. His son's life was a bit more wild than being on the road with the band. And more dangerous than knowing Buckaroo when things started to happen around him. Though, the next time they had an alien invasion, Xander would probably be a huge help.

***

Xander woke up to being pounced, cuddling the thing that pounced him. Nessie cuddled in and went back to sleep. So did he until he heard someone giggling from the doorway. He blinked at them. Buffy and Faith. "She crawled in last night. Must've been nightmares." He gently poked the baby on the side, making her blink at him. "It's morning. Did you have nightmares?" She nodded, putting her head back down. "Go shower. Buffy's here with Faith." She said something in her native language, making him laugh. "Maybe but still. Go shower." He put her onto the floor. She got up and trudged to the bathroom to clean up. Xander sat up. "Any new news?"

"Her foster mother said that you kidnaped her," Faith said. "We talked with the girls over there. They told them what happened and how it was the girls doing it. She's calmed down." Xander nodded through a yawn. "You okay?"

"I'm not bad." He looked at her. "Got a slight infection in one cut so I'm on antibiotics."

"That's good. How's the real parent thing?"

"He's still a tiny bit freaked out but he's not showing it. He's fought bad things before too."

Faith nodded. "That's always helpful." She looked at Cyndra as she came out of the bedroom. "Mini mouth abandon you?"

"She kicked most of the night so I made her go sleep with Xander." She looked at Xander, who shrugged. "We all spent time hiding from nightmares with you." He nodded, grinning at her. "Breakfast?"

"Get dressed." She huffed. "Fully dressed." She nodded, going to finish dressing. Nessie ran out of the bathroom to help her do that, babbling about the shower. It had a huge showerhead that had nearly knocked her off her feet. Xander got up. "Let me shower and dress." He went to do that, bringing clothes in with him. He came out doing up his shirt. Buffy stopped him to look at his chest then at him. He looked down then at her, shrugging. "Real hyena," he said with a point at one set of scars. He grinned. "They wanted to investigate and tried to get cuddly. We cuddled most of the night." Buffy walked off shaking her head. He grinned at Faith, who swatted him on the arm. "Girls?" They came out to walk with them. "Shoes," he reminded Nessie. She ran back to grab them and put them on while sitting on the stairs. Then she bounded down to sit with them. Xander grinned at the cooks. "The two senior slayers Buffy and Faith, ladies."

"It's good to see women with real appetites instead of pretend ones," one of the cooks said with a grin. She got them plates. Xander had to show Nessie how to cut up the sausage patties. The girls inhaled their breakfast and settled in to talk with the older slayers. They hardly ever got to talk to those two unless Xander had called them.

"The hellmouth's not in Cleveland," Buffy said once she was down to her coffee. She looked at him. "Sunnydale came with us but no hellmouth there either."

"Hellmouths are built into the structure of the world. So I'm guessing the old one just transplanted here without the structures."

She nodded. "Could be. Giles is a tiny bit freaked out. Magic's weaker here." Xander nodded. "But he found stuff about aliens."

"Yup." He grinned. "Dad told me about that." Buffy shook her head. Xander smirked. "Probably won't happen again."

"Fine." She sighed, looking at him. "What if we can't unseparate it?"

"Then we'll deal. It meant that all three of the apocalypses were at least slowed. If not fully stopped in at least one case."

"That's a good thing but what about the others coming out of the woodwork?"

Buckaroo sat down with them. "There's a huge goth subculture on this realm, ladies."

"Ours too and we're a tiny bit creeped out by them," Faith said. "A lot of feeders and wannabes."

Buckaroo nodded. "We have the same here and I'm pretty sure that a lot of the problems you had stayed there. The energy readings from the spots that had problems are reading almost normal." Buffy nodded slightly. "So perhaps your duty's not going to be as hard."

"That'd be nice but did we leave a lot of people at home?"

"No. It looks like things were fully merged sometime last night. Whatever was holding it apart was eased. Not broken because two of the spots that we were watching only eased slightly but by satellite images they're still there and alive."

"What about the ones that live on magic? Will they have problems?" Cyndra asked.

"I didn't think about that," Nessie said.

"Sometimes, we act on instinct and feeling instead of logic," Buffy said. She smiled at her. "It doesn't make you bad, Nessie. You're going to be a great slayer when it's your turn. You problem solved and did what Xander does, going to odd contacts to get what you needed to do it. Even if there's some talk about why, and about your age, it was a good problem solving." Nessie grinned. "Next time, talk out stuff like that with an adult? Even Xander?"

"I will. We needed Mr. Xander though." Xander hugged her. "Thank you."

"Welcome, Nessie." He let her cuddle. "We were working on how to get me back for problems."

Buffy nodded. "I know. You wouldn't let your girls go into a real battle without you. Even when you're fighting with us."

"If you didn't treat him badly, he wouldn't be sad," Nessie told her. "You're mean to him."

Buffy sighed. "I don't mean it to be mean, Nessie. I want to protect Xander. He gets hurt."

Nessie nodded. "So do slayers when we do our duty. I'm pretty sure everyone does when they hunt demons. Still, he's a big boy and he has the right to decide those things. When I'm older, I'll have the right to decide things too. He taught me that."

"You both do," she agreed.

Faith nodded. "We hate seeing him hurt."

"Watchers get hurt," Cyndra said. "He's a watcher too."

"Some of them have more training and we don't let the ones without training into the field."

"Which is why I had a whole continent's slayers underneath me," Xander said. "It's something we've all said needed to be sped up."

"They're taking lessons. The first group is coming out of hard training next month. Then you'd have six watchers underneath you."

"We'd have to meet them because we don't want mean ones," Nessie said.

"We've already made sure they won't be mean. We taught them the Xander method," Faith said, patting her on the head. "It'll be okay. Then Xander can fall back to more training and hovering like a big brother, and sometimes huge battles."

"Does that mean I have to go back to Cyndra's family?"

Buffy frowned. "What happened to yours?"

"Her uncle found God," Xander said dryly. "Gabriel had to save her from being burned."

"Nope, not allowed," Buffy said. "I'll talk to your foster mom myself, and Cyndra's for trying to set her up with an old guy who leered." Cyndra smiled. "You're twelve. Much too young to have a boyfriend, much less a husband."

"Especially one that old," Xander agreed.

"How old?" Buffy asked. "We heard older."

"Eighty," Cyndra said. "Gabriel turned him into a bunny."

"I like that angel guy," Faith decided. She smiled at her. "Hell no you can't have a husband at your age. If someone else tries, you kick ass."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Good." She looked at Buffy then at Xander. "Giles said he's hiring another thirty people to take over all your jobs. He's not sure about your weapons stash but he's amused that we might need it."

"Next week by the vision I sent over before that night," Xander said quietly.

"He was hoping you were running a fever," Buffy said. Xander gave her a look. "I know," she huffed. "Dumbass bad guys." She and Faith looked up. Xander looked around with a hand going to his hidden weapons. "Magic," she said, finding her knife. Faith nodded. "Girls, if it's a bad thing, hide behind the adults and take Xander's friends with you." They nodded, getting up and pulling Buckaroo with them. Willow appeared looking pissed off. "Hi, Willow. Big problems?"

"We can't do this. It's not right. These ones aren't right." She pointed. "They're a movie."

"We're a show to them," Xander said.

One of the Blue Blazer Irregulars behind Willow knocked her out. "Saving the world from being destroyed," he quipped. "She's got something blinking on her belt."

Xander hopped up to look, frowning as he took it to disarm. "Nope, she doesn't need that."

His father took it with a grin. "Neither do you. Good work, Ham." He walked it over to Buckaroo, who looked it over.

Xander shrugged. "It's not one of mine. I didn't have that in any of the warehouses."

"Any of," his father said, turning to look at him. "How many weapons were you hoarding?" Buffy and Faith burst out laughing. "It's not funny. I don't want him in prison for that."

"He's got presidential permission at home," Faith said. Buffy looked at her. "He does. We have permission to use them in case of emergency." Xander nodded, sitting down again. The girls glomped onto his sides again.

Buffy looked at Xander. "Why didn't I know this?"

"It was announced, you were complaining about your nails and weapons not being for slayers."

"Oh, okay. I probably had massive amounts of demon goo under them again." She shrugged. "It happens in my life."

"We know," Faith said dryly, patting her on the shoulder. "Your nails have their own mini slayer comic." Buffy snorted, shaking her head.

"They're really funny," Nessie told her. "Your thumb keeps complaining that he gets more dirt than the others because of how you hold your stakes. But the ones about your clothes are funnier. Especially when your skirts complain that they're supposed to hide things and can't because you're kicking people in the face."

Buffy groaned, putting her head on the table to shake it. "Oh my god," she moaned.

Faith grinned at the girls. "I'm so glad that the mini Cinderella wench does that one." Buffy sat up to stare at her. "You didn't know that she drew comics?"

"I didn't think she drew comics about me."

"Yup," Faith said with an evil smirk. "Your bras keep complaining that you never use them so you must hate them. You buy a whole bunch of them and they're prettily waiting on you but they never get used."

"I need to date, they're for dates."

"They're for everyday life," Xander shot back. "Before you flash another thing you're fighting." Buffy blushed, shrinking down. He looked at Cyndra. "When it's your turn, we'll get you one you want to wear."

"My people strap ours down. It takes longer and it's not comfortable but they don't bounce."

"Not bouncing is good while on patrol," Faith said. "It helps you not get hurt. We had one girl rip a pec muscle from bouncing." Buffy grimaced but nodded. "They had to stitch the muscle together so it'd finish healing."

"Ow," Xander muttered, rubbing his chest. "She okay?" Buffy nodded. "Good. Tell her I said to get well."

"I can do that." She leaned her elbows on the table, staring at him. "Now what?"

He shrugged. "I don't know."

"Uh-huh. Did you foresee her doing that?"

"Not a single vision."

She nodded. "Okay. There's been some whining and some serious complaining." Xander nodded. "The girls get to modify their rotations."

"If the problems are less, the girls get to have a better life," he said.

"They'll like that," Buffy agreed, smiling at Faith then at the younger slayers. "Some would like to be more normal. Some of us have been doing this for a long time."

"They'll still need trained. There's still problems," Xander said. "I have no doubt there'll be another apocalypse attempt this spring. Just like every other year."

"Every year?" Buckaroo asked.

"Usually there's a few," Buffy said. "We have one or two we can't hide and be subtle about. We have at least one other one that's more silent but still deadly."

"Like farts," Nessie said. Xander looked at her. "Oops. Sorry, probably not nice to talk about those things." She hid her face in Xander's shoulder.

He patted her on the back. "Usually boys talk about those things." She laughed.

Buckaroo looked at Buffy. "Can we get an account of what's happened?"

"You haven't stolen Xander's patrol journal? He sends it to Giles every few months for reports."

"None with me since I got summoned," Xander said. "My axe is with Cala."

Buffy pulled out her phone to call her. "It's Buffy. Do you still have Xander's patrol journal and axe? He'd like it back. No, there was a higher demon who summoned him and a few demon hunters to kill them so they'd resurrect something else. Xander went home for a few days to rest since he has cuts. Yeah, from the thing with the arms. I thought we called and told all you girls about that. I have no doubt his dad had to drug him so he'd stay in bed. You know how Xander is," she said dryly. "That and his dad's been fussing and we only merged realms last night thanks to Nessie." Cala told the others. "Yeah, he's here and okay. Cyndra and Nessie are cuddling him like he'll disappear again."

"Next time, don't be so mean to him and Mr. Xander won't have to run away to get better," Nessie said, taking the phone. "Hi, Brie. I knew it was you, Cala never answers the phone." She grinned. "He's okay. We made sure he's okay and now we're all with him here. His daddy and his daddy's friends are all worried about apocalypses and wanted his journal since Mr. Xander is being a man and not telling things like that. His daddy might get upset like our parents do. Ours fuss each time we get hurt, his would too because he's a daddy." She kissed him on the cheek. "There, from Brie and Cala." She snuggled in again. "Yup, he could use it. He's got stitches and antibiotics. No, one of his daddy's friends is a surgeon. He treated them to make sure Mr. Xander would be okay."

"I'm one too," Buckaroo told her.

"Really? That's weird that there's more than one doctor in a town."

"Hospitals have dozens of doctors in one town," Xander told her. He took the phone. "Hey, Brie. No, the great blue blinky ball of higher demon tried to get me and two hunters to sacrifice one of us to bring back another higher being. Then Willow showed up." She shuddered and told the others, who all moaned. "So I came home for a bit to rest and recuperate and tell my dad about you girls." He grinned. "That's sweet of you, sweethearts. Thank you for trying to honor me that way." He smiled. "Please. New Jersey at the moment." She laughed. "Thanks. Yup, I got both of them, Buffy, and Faith here right now. We're having a conference. That'll work if she can. Thanks, dear. Yup, behave. Please?" He grinned. "Sure. Whichever of you shows up." He hung up. "One of them will show up for meetings."

"That'll help," Buffy agreed. "We need all the active slayers to show up for a meeting anyway."

A new slayer appeared. She had short black hair, mostly straight but it was only two inches long. She had skin the color of dark roast coffee and was wearing a pair of camp shorts and a tank top with hiking boots. She held a spear in one hand and a pack in the other. She smiled. "Ladies."

"Hi, Cala," the girls said.

"Wow, Cala, new boots?" Buffy asked.

"I found them last month. My last ones fell apart thanks to the acid spitters." She handed Xander his pack. He hugged her. "We're glad you're all right."

"I'm glad I'm all right and so are you," he said, pushing her back to look her over. "Brie?" She nodded. "Good work from the mini witch."

"My sister has sense. Even if she does have magic." She nodded at the others. "I'm Slayer Cala. Senior slayer in Africa."

"Buckaroo Bonzai," he said, holding out a hand with a smile. "Xander is Tommy's son. I watched him before he got stolen to your realm."

She shook his hand. "You're a movie."

"You're a show to us in this realm."

"Huh. Interesting."

Tommy took the bag from his son. "I'll have stuff washed, Xander."

"Check the pockets," Cyndra quipped. "Sometimes things get shrunk on him."

He looked in it then at his son. "I can do that." He walked off with the bag. The clothes got tossed into the wash, he even avoided his urge to throw most of them out. Then he pulled out all the things in the many pockets. He found the journals. Those got put aside. He found the miniature weapons. He poured that pocket onto the table so he could look over them. A sword. An axe. The rest were in tiny boxes. He searched the rest of the pack, finding two herb pouches. He sniffed them and sneezed so put them aside. He'd ask later. He found one small vial that looked suspiciously like drugs and put that into his pocket for now. He'd talk to his son in a minute. He took the axe back in there. Xander took it and his touch made it grow. He cuddled it around the slayers, making them all smirk at him. "Son, the herb things?"

"Mix it with the vial of stuff, make into a tea, drop into a dream quest or handle the post vision bleedover whenever I touch things and get feelings from them." He looked at him. "The herbs as a tea work somewhat for the post-vision headaches. It's the only thing that does. We've tried everything."

"Everything?" Buckaroo asked.

Xander nodded. "One of my ex's got me a lot of stuff to try, illegal and not, and nothing helped. I was out of the herbs. We finally got that and she accidentally used the same cup so we found out. But it works and that's what's important most of the time."

"How often do you have visions?" Buckaroo asked.

Xander shrugged. "It varies. The stronger ones, which are almost always short ones, leave me with funny bleedover from touching things like tables or the bed or people. That kills it."

"How often do you have to do the full treatment instead of just the tea?"

"Sixteen visions in the last six months. Three of them were bad." Buckaroo and Tommy were both staring at him. "After the last one, I was tasting colors that were ringing everything. Tasting auras is really wrong."

"Yeah, it would be. You're having a CT tonight."

"The ones who send them aren't as powerful here either," Buffy said. "He's lucky. We know one seer that got killed by her visions. We know one that had debilitating migraines before he died and passed them onto the other one. The Powers That Be send them with pain so you don't mistake them for daydreams."

"The dream ones slayers get are weird," Cala said. "Very unusual and I can't sleep afterwards." Xander gave her a pat on the arm. "If he's around, he gets them over us to spare us for the battle he sees. We adore him for that and feel great pity he has to suffer. He only uses the tea for the bigger ones. Out of the sixteen he's only used it four times?" Xander nodded. "So one that didn't need the extra stuff we pretend not to see him drop into the tea."

"Drugs?" Buffy asked.

Xander looked at her, nodding. "It helps for some reason. I don't know why. I don't know how. I don't know why it makes the herbs work better. But when you're to the point of begging to be beheaded because of a two minute vision, you'll do anything to make it stop."

"We're doing a CT in an hour," Buckaroo ordered.

"Yes, sir."

"Thank you. Is there anything that blocks them?" The girls all shook their heads. "At all? Nothing like a protection, an electrical field?" Xander shuddered. "Tried?"

"Yup. Had one of the worst yet. The shaman were feeding me that tea before I woke up two days later." Buckaroo stared at him. Xander pointed at his eyepatch. "When it got popped it apparently opened up that gift."

"If that's a gift, I'd hate to see a punishment," Tommy said.

"Me too," Xander agreed. "I can't get to where they are to blow them up either." His slayers all patted him. "Thanks, girls. I haven't had one in a week."

"Good!" Buffy agreed. "Did we hear about the last one?"

"I faxed it."

"Then Giles has to have it." She looked at Cala. "How's it been since yesterday?"

"Quiet. I haven't seen a single non-peaceful demon." She looked at the cuddly ones. "What did you two do anyway? One of the demon priests said it was you two."

"Mr. Xander was on this realm," Nessie said. "We need Mr. Xander in our lives or else we won't be as good of slayers. He's our brother."

"He is," Cala agreed. "How did you do that?"

"I asked the demon that my emergency pendant went to." She grinned when Buffy groaned. "He went to talk to his friends."

"Why?" Buckaroo asked.

"I played poker and got them a single use emergency pendant to help them get out of bad trouble," Xander told him. "They go to different ones."

"Poker with demons?" Buckaroo asked.

"Kitten poker," Nessie said with a grin. "He taught all of us how to play for information and sometimes really cool stuff that can help during big problems."

Buffy nodded. "We do the same thing for information."

"They play poker for kittens?" Buckaroo asked.

"You can bet cash," Buffy said. "Or weapons or gems, or cats." Buckaroo walked off shuddering. "Kitten poker is really weird for normal people." She looked at Xander. "How much of your stash is from that?"

"Half. The rest is stuff I picked up as I was handling problems around me."

She nodded. "Giles read something about pirates and went to have a drink for three days."

"He saved my mom but her head was broken," Nessie said. "She's back to wearing clothes finally."

"I read that," Faith said. "It's a huge step forward." Nessie grinned at her. "Why don't you go get a piece of fruit for each of you. You could probably use fruit." She wiggled down and ran up to get them, smiling at the cook for handing them to her. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. I put apples in there for you three older ladies too." Buffy grinned and waved for that. The girls all ate and talked while Tommy dragged his son off to the infirmary again.

***

"We caught him having one during the CT," Buckaroo said when he joined the girls for lunch. He put down the papers he had written out on what Xander said. Buffy looked at it and grimaced. She handed them to Faith, who muttered something rude, then passed it on.

"If we must fight strange creatures, so be it," Cala sighed. "Can't be any worse than an invasion of demons." Buffy nodded. "We can handle that." She handed them back to Buffy. "Is Xander resting?" Buckaroo nodded. "That's good. Was it a bad one?"

"He said it was a medium one. We gave him stuff to help with the pain and let him sleep."

"That helps sometimes," Buffy agreed. "Most migraine meds won't."

"Cordy said acid helped once but not after that," Faith said. "Wes told me before he died."

"Cordy ascended," Buffy said. "That saved her, even if she did try to go half-demon to save herself from them. At least she's happy with her tentacles."

"X did say she was a happy floating squid girl," Faith agreed. "Will he need that?"

"Fish taint," Buckaroo said dryly. The girls relaxed and grinned. "Is there anywhere we can get comparison scans?"

"Ask Giles. I think he took Cordy's medical records when he heard why she was dying," Buffy said. She pulled out her phone to call him. "It's us. Xander's dad's friend wanted to know if you had anything to compare Xander's head scans to. No, new vision. Huge flying head that's maybe an alien. Yup. That's where we are. Cala's here too." She looked at her. "He said your last reports are late."

"It's been quiet. I mailed them instead. No faxes where I was."

Buffy repeated that. "He said that's fine." She listened. "No, Willow's still unconscious. Brie sent Cala, Giles. Thank you. That'll probably work. I'll tell them how to get into Xander's email. Thanks." She hung up and wrote down the address. "That's Xander's email."

Buckaroo smiled, taking it to the lab so he could pull them up. He had a code breaker program to break his password. The scans showed up a few minutes later and he pulled them up to compare to Xander's. They were marked by name of who they were. The one marked Chase, Cordelia was horrifying. He called in New Jersey and Tommy, who was swearing while reading his son's journal. He had locked himself in a room so none of the guys could watch him losing his mind over his son's exploits. He laid out the different scans by date. They had three of Cordelia's. They had two of some person named Doyle that didn't look fully normal beyond the vision damage. There were three others that looked bad, and another of Xander's. He got out of the way.

"Is this one in a coma?" New Jersey asked, pointing at one.

"Buffy said she ascended after trying to go half-demon to save herself. She described her as a glowing squid girl."

New Jersey looked at him then at the boy on the bed. He compared Xander's old one to his new one. "Less damage."

"He's got that fish taint so he's not fully human," Tommy said, staring at them. "Is that big black lump a tumor?"

"No blood flow," Buckaroo said quietly.

"Basically, brain damage to an extreme level," New Jersey said.

Tommy looked at his son's brain. "He doesn't have one."

"He has one tiny one but it's in the area of visual processing," New Jersey said with a point. "That could be where his eye was removed and he's not using it. It's not as bad as the other ones or as deep it looks like."

Buckaroo looked at the first one. "I have no idea why his is so different."

"He was a half demon," Xander mumbled. "Half bracken. He kissed Cordy and passed them to her before dying." He blinked at them, making himself sit up even though he groaned.

"Lay down," New Jersey ordered.

"Can't leave the girls alone. They'll go on a fact finding mission. They'll start to think the BBI are neat pets." He blinked at them. "That wasn't a horrible level of vision." They all stared at him. "I've had a lot worse, guys. Really. One of the worst was only a minute long and I ended up in the hospital afterward. They thought I had relapsed with the thing I had just gotten out of having." He came over to look, staring at things. "Cordy, Michelle, who is slowly dying of hers. Hers is hereditary. She's got other health issues that are making the visions hit her harder. She was thinking about a lobotomy to stop them but it wouldn't work. That's Chance. He's an asshole. Wannabe surfer dude who's a douchebag. He only sees immediate problems like fires in his area. Most of the slayers walk away from him because he's slimy. We feel sorry for his visions but not that much." He compared his, then grimaced. "Five years and less than a hundredth of what Cordy had over three years."

"Three years?" Buckaroo demanded. "That was three years?"

"Yeah. Visions every few weeks." He looked at him. "That's why she went half-demon. To try to stop that. Doyle passed his on and it treated her like it did him. Way too strong for pure humans. So I guess the fish taint may've had a reason." He grimaced. "Yay." He leaned closer to his. "There's a dot."

"That's in your visual processing area," Buckaroo said.

Xander looked at him. "My eye?" He nodded. "Not my fault the minion popped it." He sighed. "He said I saw too much and no one listened to me. He was right." He shrugged. "I'm not dying of them. I have years before I die of them."

"Can they be passed on?" Tommy asked.

Xander looked at him. "Would I curse someone else with these?"

"I... I wouldn't," he admitted. Xander hugged him. "Go back to sleep."

"I have to save everyone from the girls asking questions."

"I've got 'em," Tommy said. "Go back to sleep." He pointed at the bed. Xander grumbled but went to bed. Tommy looked at Buckaroo, who waved him off. He'd run more tests on Xander to see how badly injured he was underneath the skin. Tommy gave himself a break from the bad reading he was doing. The girls spotted him and grinned. "Let's go outside. We have trees and fresh air." They nodded, going with him. The girls were more than happy to go play in the trees. The younger ones needed to wear out energy. Cala was teaching them how to climb trees. Buffy watched them while the girls talked Faith into playing tag when they were tired of climbing.

Nessie pounced him, pinning him down. "Is Mr. Xander not okay?"

"He's resting from the vision. He's been up but I sent him back to bed."

"He does that to us sometimes," Nessie said, kissing him on the cheek. "You're a nice dad." She ran off again.

He sat up, dusting his shirt off. "You're a pretty neat kid." She grinned at him and pounced Buffy, making her yelp. Tommy had to laugh. Buffy was a bit uptight. It was good for her to play too.

New Jersey came out with a pitcher of juice and some plastic cups. "Girls, juice." They ran over to pounce him for it and walked off drinking. He sat beside Tommy, looking at him. "He's in really good shape," he said quietly. "He could have a lot more injuries. Buckaroo found a tiny little tattoo that unhid some more scars, including one around his eye. After he took scans of everything he redid it." Tommy nodded. "We found a few breaks the old scans hadn't caught, all healed. We found a slight dent in one vertebrae, looks older. That may be why he tries to pop his neck sometimes. We caught some disc compression starting. Probably from all the walking he does and the training."

"But he's good?"

"He's good. He's probably having happy dreams. Buckaroo let him have his axe to cuddle."

"He sleeps with it," Buffy said, coming over with the glasses and pitcher. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." He smiled. "How long has he slept with his axe?"

"Since after he dumped Anya at the altar but I'm not sure when exactly. It's like his teddy bear sometimes." She went back to the girls.

Tommy nodded. "I saw that in his journal. He wanted her to be happier than they showed him they'd be."

"We all know that relationships are hard. Or else most of us wouldn't be single." He shifted. "Where is Penny?"

"This month? Japan. She left for a trip because she was feeling less than adequate to be in his life. Again." That got a nod because they'd all seen her have self-esteem dips and New Jersey took the stuff inside. The older slayers were teaching the two younger ones about the weapons they were carrying. At least Faith had regular knives. Buffy had a scythe for some reason. Cala had her spear. When Xander stumbled out he still had his axe so the girls got to pet it and help him sharpen it.

"You have to love a weapon that helps you defeat a god," Nessie said. "Can Mr. Xander's axe and your scythe cuddle up to make baby weapons, Buffy?"

"I don't think baby weapons are made that way," she admitted. The girls all giggled. "But mine's a specially blessed slayer weapon so maybe. I don't know."

"I tried to come up with a hybrid weapon but it didn't work too well," Xander admitted. "I made a new staff weapon. You could have a sword blade or an axe head on the other end of the handle from the scythe end."

"Sounds like something I want to try," Faith said.

"I sent Giles the diagrams so he can have a tester made," Xander said. Then he yawned again. "I'm fine," he said at the stares.

"Sure, and we're princesses," Faith said dryly. "Go nap off the headache, X." He nodded, getting up and taking his axe up to his couch bed.

"We take good care of him and make him do things like eat and rest," Tommy told them. They grinned at him and Nessie ran over to hug him then ran back to pounce Faith, who rolled around with her wrestling. You had to grin because the girls were adorable. Even if it seemed like he had some young daughters to help his son raise.

***

Buckaroo was sitting there when Xander woke up again. He stared at him for a moment. "The girls have their own room next door."

"They can share mine. They're used to sharing."

"They're sharing one together. That way they don't have to deal with girl things in front of you. Buffy asked." Xander rolled his eyes but sat up. Buckaroo pushed him back down. "Was the plan to move them here to stop those apocalypses?"

"No. I was kinda hoping that you could do that doorway so I could go back and maybe recruit some more good help for the girls. Especially guys who are about ready to retire so they can do watcher duty. Giles hired some but they can't handle the backwoods. They can't handle hard times. They can't handle it if the corrupt military unit shows up in a village looking for victims, slaves, and stuff to steal about the same time as the local rebel group does. I think most of the ones Giles hired will faint at the sight of a gun. I was hoping you could help me find some."

"I'd be more than happy to help you get the girls help. So she came up with that one...."

"A lot of people think Nessie is mine." He grinned. "I'd gladly formally adopt her."

"She's a good kid. We adore her. She got free of Buffy and went to talk to the younger set of Blue Blazer Irregulars about what they did. She got scared of one that said he was military but he explained the difference between our military and theirs."

"I've done that once or twice too."

"They've got some fans among the guys." He leaned forward. "You needed to do this earlier."

"I couldn't do it earlier without doing some sacrificing. With that one demon dying and then Willow being there, I could power the call in of the life debt. Gabriel wanted things to be stopped too, that's why they killed him. Now he's not and he's helping the hunters thing end." Buckaroo nodded. "I had the idea how to do it once I found out why I got snatched, but I couldn't do it without sacrificing some people ritually."

"That's a hard thing I don't want to deal with either." He stood up. "Your dad's reading your journal."

"Should I hide?"

"He's not angry. He was earlier but he's calmed down and read more. Now he's a bit depressed. You might want to go remind him you survived."

"I can do that then hide."

Buckaroo smiled. "You can hide from me too because I'm reading them after him."

"I can go to Cleveland."

"Nope." He stood up. "C'mon, it's dinner."

Xander nodded, going down with him to eat. He walked up behind his father and hugged him from behind. "I survived." He read what he was reading and snorted. "That was happy times." He went to get his own plate.

"Get back here once you've got food," he said quietly. It was clearly his version of the dad voice. He looked up to find all the slayers staring at him. "The traveling show." Nessie giggled. "Have you guys met any of the future watchers?"

"They're not allowed near us until they pass a lot of training and someone makes sure they're not assholes," Cala said. "We don't need more of them in our lives."

"Good point," Tommy said. "Has anyone talked to you about them?"

"Mr. Xander let us see pictures Mr. Giles sent," Nessie said. "Mr. Xander's not sure if they're going to come to us or not."

"That's because most of them would run at the sign of a gun being pointed at them," Xander said, sitting next to his father. "What bothered you about that?"

Tommy looked at his son. "Triplets."

"They were nice to me."

"What about a single relationship, son?" he sighed.

"I haven't had one of those since mine with Anya. It was like it broke me in a few ways. Including my stamina issue. I have way too much stamina."

"It doesn't help during shopping trips," Cala teased.

"That's because I'm not a girl," Xander shot back with a smirk. "Girls shop, I only help you carry stuff."

"Is that where that ...built up stash went?"

"Do you think someone else made sure their villages could eat?" Xander asked, looking at him. "Most of them were having thin times. Some of them are still having thin times."

"That's kind of you," Tommy said. "I admire that. How much did you save for yourself?"

"Traveling expenses. Fixed the jeep. Had to buy a truck when the jeep got ruined by a demon smashing it to pieces. Then I had to replace all the clothes and most of the weapons in there. About ninety percent went to the slayers or their villages." He ate a bite of dinner and stared at it. "What's that?"

"Pineapple."

"Huh. Been a while since I had those." He shrugged and ate it. The girls grinned and ate it too. He looked at them. "You three need to eat everything you can unless it's poisonous." They sighed but nodded and dug in. Cala got seconds on the rice dish. The cook gave her a short stare then added more meat too. The girl grinned and bounced back to her seat. "Thanks," Xander called. "They need to eat more."

"They're good girls," the cook said.

Tommy looked up as the chow house's door opened and a blonde woman flounced in. "He's in the lab," he called.

She flinched, looking at him. "Tommy. I didn't hear you were dating. Did you already adopt kids with him?"

He stared at her. Sometimes he wondered why Buckaroo was drawn to this slightly ditzy blonde woman. "This is my son Alex," he said blandly. She gasped, staring at him. Xander grinned and wiggled his fingers at her. "These are some of the slayers he's training. We finally got him home and they came looking for him."

"Oh, wow. I heard there were girls in the bunkhouse finally, I came to help them settle in." She came over. "Hi, I'm Penny."

"I'm Cala, this is Cyndra and Nessie." She shook her hand.

"Nice to meet you, Miss Penny," Nessie said, shaking her hand with a smile. "Excuse us while we eat. It's hungry time."

"I'm sure it is. Buckaroo's in the lab, Tommy?" He nodded, stuffing his mouth. "Thank you. Nice to meet you, Alex." She went to find her spouse. He looked up and smiled when she walked into his engineering lab. "I met Alex and his slayers?"

"Long story." He kissed her and she leaned against his side. "He finally found his way home."

"That's good. I'm sure Tommy's happy to have him back."

"He is. They're trying to get to know each other again. He's not the cute little guy that used to crawl into our laps and ask us to read him something." He smiled, going back to what he was studying.

"What's this?"

"Energy readings from the realm where Xander was."

"Like when the aliens were here?" she asked, pulling back to look up at him.

"No. Their realm merged with ours thanks to the girls wanting Xander back and the way he got back." She moaned. "We're working on it but it seems to have lessened a lot of problems they were having with demons."

"Demons?"

"Yup."

"Like on that tv show?"

"Yup. We thought that was Alex. We're a movie to them. He showed it to his girls." He grinned. "Nessie asked me what music was for. She's really smart."

"That's...that's a great thing." She pulled away, looking at him. "Now what happens?"

"He's home, they're all home since the realms merged. It stopped a few huge problems going on over there. Alex said it stopped some future problems too. We're foreseeing one problem still but the girls think they can handle it. Xander wanted help to recruit for watchers who can handle the rough living with the girls who live in their native environments."

"Some of the Irregulars could," she agreed.

"A few who retired would make excellent training watchers." He grinned. "We're still figuring things out, Penny. Relax." She nodded, hugging him again. He hugged her back.

***

Cala woke Xander up. "You need to talk to the local enclave. They've sent for you." He nodded, getting up and grabbing a t-shirt to pull on then his sneakers. He weaponed up with his lighter duty ones and followed her out. They could jog there. It was only a mile. The Irregular on the gate gave them an odd look but Xander waved it off. The guard decided they were sneaking off for something less than harmful so it was okay. Cala walked into the bar first. Xander followed after her.

"Xander," some of them called.

"Wow, make me feel like Norm, guys," he cracked, grinning at them. "What's up?" He sat down at a table full of demons he mostly knew. They went over what had happened and more about his family's weird things. Now they knew why Xander was the way he was. It made so much more sense when put against what his dad's people did. Cala had a soda, played a few hands of kitten poker but refused to take the cat home with her, and got information on the local community for Xander since he was chatting. Then they went back to the compound like nothing had been going on and went back to bed.

***

Penny came out of the chow house the next morning with a cup of tea, pausing by the guys she hung out with sometimes. "Why did Alex grab his forehead and fall down moaning? It wasn't a seizure and he said it wasn't that important. I ran into Tommy and told him but he looked horrified."

"He's got visions," one of them said, hopping up and running out back. "Tommy!"

"Got him," he called. "Get a gurney? I knocked him out when he kept complaining."

"Got it." He called that in. Buckaroo jogged out to help Tommy carry him inside.

"He doesn't usually get two in a row," Nessie said from her spot in a tree. The guys looked up at her. "Cala said to sit up here and to make sure that I'm not attacked. She ran off for the gate to stop the demon." She grimaced. "Cyndra went with her even though Cala said not to." Guys ran for the front gate. The two girls were in a fight with the three demons. Cyndra was limping but she stabbed the demon. Cala got the second one and then kicked the third while leaning on her spear, then spun it around to stab him. She kicked his head off his neck and looked at the car. Cyndra was looking at something and disarming it by the time Buckaroo got out there.

"Don't touch the bombs," Buckaroo ordered.

"Xander taught me to disarm them." She frowned, cutting the right wire and getting out of the way when the men moved her. "It's off. Cala, we need to check the trunk and stuff to see if there's anything the villages could use."

"We will once the guys are done," she said, leaning on her spear. "Didn't I say to stay with Nessie?"

"You needed help."

She snorted. "Really? You're limping, your wrist looks swollen. You've got a black eye coming up."

Cyndra huffed. "I may be young but I'm a slayer just like you are, Cala, and there's been ones that went on full patrol by my age."

"Then they died young," she shot back. "Sit down before I tell Xander on you."

Tommy stomped over. "Next time, tell us and we'll help," he told them, looking at each of them. "Cala, you're limping. Go to the infirmary and wait on someone to check your kicking ankle." She ducked her head. "You did okay. We're all really impressed. Not one of us could kick someone's head off their neck. You're still limping and clearly coming down from the adrenaline." He pointed. "Go hover over Xander until one of the docs comes in to check you over." She nodded, going inside. He looked at the other one, squatting down to get on her level since she was sitting on the ground pouting.

"Hey," he said more gently. She looked up at him. "You're too young to have to fight. That's an adult job and plenty of us would've taken them on to protect you girls. We do it for the boss, we'll do it for you." She blushed and ducked her head again. He pushed her chin back up. "You're too young and you jumping in that way makes all of us guys feel unnecessary and weak. We want you training so you last until you're at least Buffy's age. If not older." She nodded. "What's Xander's rule on that?"

"No battles until we're passed our training and at least sixteen unless we're under attack or it's protecting the group we're in," she said quietly.

"That's sensible. You're stronger when you're older. You're faster, you're more trained. Right now, you're good. At sixteen or even eighteen you'll be great. We want you to make it to great."

She hugged him. "You nag like Xander too. Thank you."

He patted her on the back. "Welcome. Let's get you checked over."

"Slayers heal. We have faster healing."

He looked at her. "I'll have Xander spank you if you don't go get your injuries checked and then I'll do it too since you're like his kids and that'd make me your grandfather. Even if I am a cool one." She grinned and blushed, getting helped up so she could head for the infirmary. He waited until they were gone to huff and look at Buckaroo. "My son probably does the same thing."

"Yup."

"We need to give them more support."

"He wanted help finding new watchers who could take over some of the girls living in native regions." Buckaroo was trying not to smile at the frustrated father. They were quickly coming up on the huge hissy fit that Tommy could throw.

"We know some guys who could. I'll introduce them to Mr. Giles." He walked off. "Both the girls had small combat injuries."

"I'll be there in a minute. Let me make sure there's no more weapons." He waited until Tommy was back inside the building to smile. "Tommy was the same way when he was Alex's age." The guys all grinned. They stripped the car of anything not original to it and brought it inside for the girls to go through. Nessie plopped down in front of the pile to sort things out. Everyone let her. She seemed to know what she was doing. The two slayers were having sprained things wrapped. Xander was sedated, he was snoring. Cala was on the end of Xander's bed. Cyndra was on the next bed over, which had been moved closer to him. "Let's check things over, ladies." They sighed but let him look over the injuries. New Jersey was fussing over them. Once they were released he brought them to the sitting room. "You guys said you needed to sort stuff."

Nessie pointed. "That's the pile of useful things for the villages. That pile I don't know what it is. That one's papers and Mr. Xander usually has to go over those." Buckaroo settled in to help by going over things. He confiscated two more weapons but ignored the girls pouting.

"Girls, those are weapons," Penny said with a grin. She didn't want to upset them.

"We're slayers, ma'am, we all know weapons," Nessie said politely. "We're all trained to handle weapons if necessary and once we're on patrol we use them nightly. Even if most of the time we use bladed weapons instead of guns, sometimes guns come in handy. Especially when things like snakes can sneak into your village to bite you or other not-fast-enough things." Penny stared, mouth open.

"That's their life, Penny," Buckaroo said quietly. "Xander trained them all in how to handle things to keep themselves safe in Africa." She slumped. "They're not shopping girls. They study, they train for their future duties, and they're expected to last as long as possible."

"That's why the first rule is there's no permission to die," Nessie agreed. The other girls nodded. "We're not allowed to die, no matter what."

"That's a good, hopeful thing," Buckaroo said, giving her a hug. "I hope you're a grandmother, Nessie."

"Eww, having kids is gross. I had to watch one of the women have hers so I'd know what happens. It was so gross!"

Cala patted her on the back. "Yes it is."

"If you want a husband, he'll want at least two," Cyndra said. "One son to carry on his name and a daughter to marry off. That's why I don't want to be married. I'd have to train my daughters like Xander trained us and a husband wouldn't appreciate that."

"At least it's not like that one girl back in the 1800's that Xander said the old Council married off to someone they hated so the demon would attack the family when she got pregnant," Cala said. "He told my family about that when they asked about children. He told them how I'd have to protect myself if I ever had any."

Nessie grimaced. "Yuck." She said something in her native language. The girls giggled and hugged her. "Maybe I'll have someone pull the girl things out. That shouldn't matter to being a slayer. Right, Mr. Buckaroo?"

"No, it shouldn't. That's a bit extreme though."

"Have you seen a baby being born?"

He nodded. "I've delivered a few babies over the years." He smiled. "It's nasty but you get a baby out of it. Most people consider that a good trade off."

"Eww. Did you deliver Mr. Xander when Mr. Tommy had him?"

"Um...no. Tommy's girlfriend had Xander without telling him. Then someone tried to attack her to get Alex so she dropped him off. She never told him she was going to have a baby."

"Huh. We thought Mr. Xander was born specially because of all the stuff that goes on around him," Nessie said, looking at the bigger slayers. They nodded they agreed. "Are you sure he was born like normal people?"

"As far as we know, yes. We have no idea what his mom did before she handed him to Tommy."

"Wow. So maybe he was blessed or something. We met a baby who came out blessed. She'll be a witch some day soon. She came out glowing too. Mr. Xander got stopped by a priest to see if she was infected with a demon. He thought the mother had been possessed and had done an exorcism. She was okay afterward but I heard one of the slayers had to stop them."

"Yes I did," Cala agreed. "It's the same sort of dumb that burns us at a stake." Nessie leaned back to hug her. "Thank you, Nessie."

"You're welcome." She sat up and looked at Cyndra, who shrugged and got her own hug. "You're still a really good sister."

"I like being a sister."

Pula appeared in a flash of light, falling to her knees. Nessie crawled over and hugged her. "Pula, is everyone okay?"

She looked at her, hugging her back. "My uncle's an asshole," she said in Swahili. "I'm leaving before I kill him like the evil demon pretending to be him deserves. Thankfully my cousin stabbed him for trying to touch her again." The girls cooed and hugged her. "I'm okay, I just need to calm down and Xander can lead me through my meditations."

"I can do that," Buckaroo said. "I taught him some of them." She stared at him. "I'm one of Xander's uncles. He calls me stepmom sometimes."

She smiled. "It's better than his original set."

"No, his original father is great. They kidnaped him and put him in Sunnydale."

"Eww. That's mean." She slumped, looking behind her. "Xander, my uncle is no more and my mother is sobbing like her husband died."

"Who did he try to cheat this time?" he asked, sitting behind her to cuddle her.

"He tried to touch my cousin again so she took my dagger and stabbed him."

"It's a good use for it. If I had caught him the last time she wouldn't have had to." She leaned against his shoulder. "Who sent you?"

"Brie. We're all gathered at the farm."

"That's fine. You girls need support." She nodded, leaning against his shoulder. "What else is going on?"

"My mother tried to force my father to bring him into our house because he lost his farm gambling. She sent me to talk to the demons he played with. He praised my talking to him like a regular being about it. Then he brought me home to tell my mother I was a child and this discussion was not for children. Father sent her from the farm and told her to stay away because she threatened to burn it when I told her that my cousin had miscarried her father's child. Father was not pleased and he said we'd take her in. He showed up today to pretend to be an evil one."

He kissed her on the head. "There's assholes like him all over the world. You'll learn how to deal with them and avoid them coming near you." She nodded against his shoulder. "We'll meditate together later. Call your father to make sure he knows you're here with me. I'll call Dawn."

"I tried to call Dawn to let her know so she could put it into the Chronicles. Buffy said she's on vacation."

Xander stared at her. "Vacation?" She nodded. "Dawn's in college. Why is she on vacation in the middle of a semester?"

"I don't know."

"What the fuck did she do this time?" he muttered, pulling out his phone. "Buffy, where's Dawn?" He listened to her spluttering. "Because, dumbass, I'm a bit worried since you told Pula she's on vacation in the middle of a semester of college." She babbled about having her somewhere safe. "Let me guess, it was Willow's idea?" She muttered. Something in that rambling clicked in his mind. "Did you think that your sister's body might be magical in nature?" he demanded. "That it might be killing your sister to be trapped in an anti-magic space?" Buffy gasped. "Go. Fix. It. Before I do. I'm not putting up with sister killing unless it's really necessary." He hung up and took a calming breath. He looked at the girls. "I think Willow whammied her mind again. She's rambling and babbling like when I got drunk." They nodded. They all had doubts about Willow helping slayers. They didn't usually like witches.

Willow appeared. "She's safe, Xander. That's what matters." Buckaroo wisely got out of the way and took Penny with him, shoving her into the hall with him blocking Rosenburg from going after her when the girls started to reach for weapons subtly.

Xander stood up, staring at her. "Dawn's body was made by magic. You stuffing her somewhere that's stripping her magic from her will kill her. How is that safe?" She snorted. He punched her, knocking her into a wall. "Fuck no, this shit's not going to go on. I'll be fucking damned," he said, pulling up his powers. "No more, Rosenburg." He looked around. "I need a marker, some handcuffs, and some herbs. Herbs should be in my kit, Nessie." She ran off to grab it from his room. Buckaroo handed over handcuffs and a marker when one of the guys handed them to him.

"Thank you." He took the box. "Girls, go. You don't need to see this." They ran out back, they knew that tone of voice. He growled and calmed himself, pulling out what he needed. He chanted over the herbs he mixed. When she started to wake up, he stepped on her throat for a minute while he kept going to knock her back out. When he was done, he knelt beside her to ink marks onto her. "Hot water?" he asked quietly as he worked. He went back to chanting. "Or I can shove it up her as a suppository." Hot water got handed in. When Xander finished marking her, he handcuffed her and made the elixir from the herbs.

She started to wake up. He used that momentary confusion to pour the tea down her throat. She spluttered and choked but he kept pouring it. She screamed and writhed and struggled but magic was flowing out of her. Black magic, white magic, chaos and demonic magics. All flowing from her pores. Her ears, her eyes. Her mouth as she tried to vomit up the tea. He stared at her, going back to the chanting over her. He drew two last marks on her forehead. She passed out with one last scream.

"There, it is done. The spirits great and small are pleased," he said in Swahili. "No more are you a problem that the slayers or spirits must deal with, Rosenburg." He stood up, grabbing a few other things. He started to chant as he smudged her and the areas around her, sending the magic back to the Goddess to be cleaned. He closed his eyes as a spirit floated in. "Leave her, Tara. She's not your Willow."

He stared at her. "I'm sorry but she won't do it again. Go save Dawn?" She nodded, bowing and kissing Willow on the forehead before leaving. Xander went back to smudging to clean the bad energy from the room. Finally he relaxed and looked at her. "Phone?" It got handed over. "Thank you." He called Giles. "I have acted as the shaman of the slayers," he said in greeting, sounding firm and in control. "The attempted killing of one of us is the last straw. She is bound in ways that I have found in some of the oldest methods. She will stay bound until long after I die. There is no more magic within her. She cannot grow more. It will not pass onto her children if she has one so she can't turn into something like the Madisons did. Yes, her, Giles."

He slumped onto the floor again, staring at her. "Passed out. Did they manage to save Dawn?" He winced at the yelling. "Tara's leading Buffy to her if she doesn't know. Check them for memory spells." He hung up and looked at her. "By rights, I should send you to meet your ancestors to see if they would correct you," he said when Willow moaned and tried to move. "I have decided that is not my decision to make. "You will face a tribunal. Either the coven's or the council's. Because you're too dangerous to be left alone." He got up and found something in his kit, crushing it and tossing it onto her. She disappeared. Xander finished the bad energy purge then sank down onto the floor to calm himself down.

"I had no idea that you learned that much," Buckaroo said, pulling him closer to hug.

"I'm a full shaman. I'm the shaman that helps the slayers." He looked at him. "She stuck a body made by magic into a magic withholding and stripping cell. A girl she said was like her own sister. Buffy's sister Dawn. It was bind Willow or kill her."

"Binding her means she can atone."

Xander looked at him. "She hasn't for any of the other ones. She swears she'll fix it and then doesn't. This was just the last straw."

Gabriel appeared, staring at him. "How did you do that?"

Xander stared at him. "Shaman."

"I didn't realize.... Huh." He smirked. The boy was bordering on crazy yet genius; Gabriel could appreciate that combination. As long as it didn't screw up his life. "Can I have a task for the third life debt before you figure out something nasty?"

"Make sure my dad and stepmom, and all the others special to them die of old age instead of something like a bad guy," he said, staring at him. "Not me, because I know you can't do that for me by the rules, but protect them. When they're all passed on and I have, you're free of that third one. I'll find something for Castiel's."

Gabriel looked at Buckaroo then at Xander. "That's...." Xander smirked. "Fine, I can play guardian angel over them until they're old and ready to pass over." He disappeared with a sigh but was happy. Xander could've asked for something really horrible. This was pretty mild and kind of nice of him.

Buckaroo swatted him on the head. "Don't try that."

Xander looked at him. "I'm not losing you or Dad, or the guys, before it's their time."

"Uh-huh. Go shower. You're all sweaty. Then eat something because you're shaking." Xander sighed but got up to do that. "Guys, how are the girls?" he called.

"They're making darts from tree branches," one of the Irregulars called. He leaned in and sniffed. "What happened?"

"Xander pulled up his authority as a shaman to deal with Rosenburg."

"Ooooh. Tommy's going to blow his stack," he muttered, going to find him. He was in the security office. "You okay?"

"I'm good. I'm going to ask my son about his shaman training later. What it means, what he's supposed to be handling. If he can deal with the spirit in the attic. I figure that'll take long enough for him to calm Penny down." He looked up. "Pinky, the girls?"

"Making darts from branches."

"That's good. Let me get the kid something to eat." He got up and went that way, taking the journal with him. He carried the cup of soup into Xander's room, putting it in front of him on the bedside table. Xander looked at it then up at him from under the towel he was using on his hair. "He said you needed to eat."

"I had to."

"I wanted you to hit her harder." He sat down beside him. "You okay?"

"Yup. I should've done it years ago." He looked at him. "The Devon Coven kept saying they'd handle it. They had her under control. Her addiction was under control. They never looked apparently." He slumped, taking the soup to sip.

"Can I ask about something?"

"Sure. I don't mind most of it."

"Pirates?"

"They had Nessie and her mom hostage."

"Not them. The other ones."

"They thought I'd make a charming camp helper," he said dryly. "I don't mind gay sex now and then but not with them. So I said no, really hard. The local government showed up to see what had happened. I told them they had tried to attack me so I had used their weapons on them. That official is still probably scared to death I'm going to take his corrupt butt out."

Tommy hugged him. "I don't care if you date guys or girls, Xander, but date someone nice enough to help you raise the slayers. They're good grandkids." Xander grinned, leaning against his shoulder. Tommy patted him. "Drink the soup. Get dressed. We'll go save the guys from the girls trying to hunt them down."

"Some of the guys might make it past them." He sipped the soup as he got up to grab some clothes.

"Why do you have a scar on your dick?"

Xander looked down then at him. "Girlfriend."

"Why?"

"Her teeth slipped."

"Was she a people eater?"

"Fully human. She had her teeth sharpened in case she had to use them during a fight. I'm really glad I was blocking her from accidentally hitting her poisoned tooth when her phone went off." Tommy shook his head, looking down and slightly moaning. "She was fun but only for a week in Venice."

"I haven't gotten there yet."

"I don't think I wrote her down. That's my patrol journal. Not too many lovers or fun stuff in there. It was during Carnivale and I was hunting something. We hooked up after she saw me killing the sea monster."

"No girls nearby?"

"Buffy was in Rome but she's...kind of a prude, Dad. She said she couldn't handle all the naked times going on that year." He slid into boxer briefs then jeans and a t-shirt. His father took that one and handed him another one. "Yes, Dad."

"Thank you." He let him put on sneakers and they went out to handle the girls for a few more hours. When they all ended up curling up together to nap under the trees, they made sure someone was there to guard them. They didn't want to see what Xander would do if they woke him up.

Buffy appeared in a flash of light, staring at Buckaroo. "Where's Willow?"

"He crushed some purple stone and threw it on her."

"That should've brought her home," she said, grimacing.

"Is your sister all right?"

"I guess. Giles took over the freeing and won't let me near her."

"Memory spells," Tommy said as he walked past the door.

"They're going to check us later." She sighed, looking at Buckaroo. "If she shows back up, tell me and I'll come pick her up."

"Xander said he bound her from using all magic."

"How? He can't do magic stuff."

"He's a shaman and he used their rites."

"What's a shaman?"

He stared at her. "It's like being blessed by the Goddess, only on a more native path. Native Americans and some of the tribes in Africa have them. Giles should know."

"Can you tell Giles what he did?"

"I can tell him some of it. I'm not one, I've never trained as a priest of native magics."

"I'm surprised Xander has," she mumbled. She rubbed her forehead. "Please write a report for Giles." He nodded. She got pulled back to the Council building. "Did she reappear here?"

"Africa," one of the witches said. "Brie called. What did he do?"

"Buckaroo said he used shaman stuff? What's a shaman?"

"It's partially like being an earth healing witch and partially like being a priest of native magics," the head of the coven said as she came up the hall. "Yes, Xander took much training with the ones he ran into because they discovered his gifts were their sort instead of the white man's magic. Including being able to touch spirit animals."

"The hyena?"

"Opened that gift." She smiled. "He did a very good job from what Brie said."

"I asked Buckaroo to write Giles a report. Is Dawn okay?"

"No," the head of the coven said. "She will be. Right now she's worn down, her body is one big ache from the draining it was doing, and she'll take a few months to recover. She's lucky, Buffy. A few more days and you wouldn't have had a sister." Buffy slumped but nodded, looking down. "Let's check you for memory spells, dear. Then we'll get the other slayers." They pulled her into the magic working room to test her. They found a few and removed them. They got Giles next, then went through everyone else.

One went to test Xander but the men with guns made her hesitate. "The Devon coven sent me to check Xander and his slayers for memory charms, boys. May I?" she asked in her best genteel voice.

Tommy came out to look at her. "When he's awake. He's exhausted."

She nodded. "You're very protective of him. Is he yours?"

"My son."

"Oh!" She blinked. "Then you're the one they stole him from." Tommy nodded, crossing his arms over his chest to stare at her. She smiled. "We helped him do the research on how to get home."

"Alex?" Tommy called. Cala snapped awake, staring at them. "She wanted to test you guys for memory charms."

"Willow's excellent at them," she complained. She sat up, looking at the witch. "Miss Maisy."

"Cala." She patted her on the head and tested her. "Only one." She removed it. Cala nudged the other girls. She smiled at her for that kindness. "Only one on Nessie. Apparently she wanted to control how wild you are, dear."

Nessie grimaced. "That's dumb. I'm not that wild. I'm not dancing around fires yet or sleeping with boys or anything else wild."

"Willow can't really look at boys and she's a bit uptight. Almost anything that's not scholarly is wild to her. Including running around and playing."

"That's because her parents sucked," Xander mumbled. "What's happened now?"

"Checking for memory spells, Xander. Did you cast something on her?"

He opened his good eye to look at her. "I used my gifts to bind her permanently. She's not coming back and I'm going to call for a tribunal one way or another."

"You don't do magic." He lifted his shirt and pointed at something on his side. "Oh!" She covered her mouth. "We heard you had trained with shaman but not that you were officially one." He nodded. "That makes much sense. By the way, you sent her down there." Xander glared toward the south. "Let me check you for memory spells. I won't interfere with anything you have going on. I know you have to keep up a shield against spirits." She ran her hand over his forehead and stepped back. "The hyena is not amused."

Xander laughed. "She's hardly ever amused when the pack is threatened." He concentrated and she went quiet. "Try it again." She did and frowned. "How many?"

"There's clouding things and a lot of others. I'm not sure how to remove them. I'm going to have to call the senior witch."

"I'll see her at the tribunal. Tomorrow?"

"I'll ask her." She got brought back and told the group of the strongest witches what she had found. They nodded they could work on it tomorrow. Best to get those things out of the way. They had told Brie how to check those other slayers and she had found two they had to remove. They brought all of Xander's slayers up to hover over him for a bit. It'd be easier and he'd stay calm around them. They didn't want him fighting them during the block removal.

***

Tommy and Xander came back from the tribunal. The girls were waiting but only pounced them for hugs. "You guys multiplied," Tommy joked.

Pula grinned. "They needed the rest of us to clear off any spells. Xander, is Dawn okay?"

"She's not great but she'll heal. She's refusing to see her sister. She's refusing to see Giles. She and I talked and we'll figure stuff out." They nodded and cuddled them some more. "You guys are so silly. It's pretty out, go play."

"We've been playing," Cala said with a manic grin. "We chased them all over the woods." Tommy laughed, walking off shaking his head. The girls followed. "Let him change, ladies." They came back to monopolize Xander. The others came to peel the girls off and take them to the sitting room to talk to Buckaroo and Penny. Who was still a bit creeped out by the girls.

Tommy came in after changing and sat down. Almost instantly the two youngest slayers were in his lap and snuggled in sucking their thumbs. "Been a while since I did this," he said quietly. "But sure."

Buckaroo smiled. "They look comfortable."

"They're good girls. They'll grow up to be good women hopefully."

"Maria's mother is very uptight," Xander said with a point at her. "She's loud, opinionated, and uptight but she's always there for her daughter. If I have to drop the girls off on someone, she's my choice. The other one, she's just adorable and cranky most of the time. So you're miraculous."

"No, I'm perfect. Buckaroo's miraculous." Buckaroo smirked at him. "So what's up, boss?"

"Few things. Xander, are the realms going to separate?" He shrugged. "No clue?"

"I didn't do it. You might ask Gabriel."

He appeared, already shaking his head. "Nope. Because this way our war is stopped. We all agreed it's not separating and the few beings left back on the old one are more than welcome to it. It won't separate for the next three hundred years." He looked at the girls. "She's got chicken pox."

Xander leaned over to check behind her ears, nodding. "She does. We'll handle that." He pulled her into his lap. "Cuddle me. You've got spots."

"Bad spots?" she asked in her native language.

"Chicken pox spots."

"Yucky?"

"Yup."

"Mommy mad?"

"No. She won't be mad. It happens to kids." She nodded, cuddling into his lap. "How are things at their homes, Gabriel?"

"Quiet. Everything's quiet. Until that giant floating head you had the vision about shows up in a few months. I'll warn her mother." He disappeared. He warned the witches too.

Xander checked her forehead by kissing. "No fever yet." She grinned around her thumb. "Nessie?" She looked up. "Did you ask the nice demon guy for anything else?"

"Nope. I just wanted to have you back, Mr. Xander."

"I get that. I missed you girls too." They all smiled at him. He looked at Buckaroo, who smiled as well. "Now what?"

"The president is working with Mr. Giles to set up what a slayer needs. He wasn't sure about your artillery stashes but then Giles shared reports." Xander nodded but rolled his eyes. "He was not amused."

"No one's amused when I have to save others. They all think I'm *normal*."

"No, you're not normal," Tommy said. "You've never been normal, Xander. If you were normal, they wouldn't have picked you to go stop Willow." Xander leaned on his arm. He looked at his boss again. "So Xander and the girls are going home to Africa?"

"They can. The president wants Xander to be local for a little bit. That leaves worried parents."

"We called," Pula said. "We called everyone's parents. Only one got upset but she hates Xander for being a white man and learning native lessons. She wanted her daughter to go to a native shaman to train with him. Xander set her up with one." That girl nodded. "We talked to him too because he was there and he realized what had happened and that it was keeping us all safe until things were settled. He said he'd see her when she got back in a few days. Her mom quit blaming Xander when a huge demon appeared and threatened to eat her for upsetting Xander because he had a headache and he was growly?"

"Tiny bit. They removed years worth of Willow's spells on me," he admitted. "Back before she knew she had magic she was doing will-based casting that caused problems." The girls all patted him. "I can get you guys back home."

"Giles said the new watchers were ready," Buckaroo said.

"He's full of shit," Xander said. "Half of them can't figure out how to read a map, much less follow directions. Half of them can't shoot, the other half are scared to death of being in the middle of nowhere alone with a slayer. Two are worried the slayers are going to pounce them for ...relations and then charge them with abuse. He and I talked about that and I talked to the group about the girls in Africa. They all were horrified. Giles sighed in defeat but they can go join the ones in Europe he guessed. There's two that may do it in the next class and they're coming out early. They're both former military. May not know all the classifications but they'll learn with the girls. Cala, one's your new watcher." She grimaced but nodded. "That means you can travel with him and have him back you up in case of emergency."

"That might be nice. I hate driving."

"He's to do that," Xander assured her with a grin. She nodded. "The other one's going to be doing the same circuit I am but starting at the other end. That way we're not leaving you little ones uncovered so often." They all grinned at him. "There's one in the next class coming in that'll make an excellent field watcher as long as he doesn't freak out and he'll be Zen's watcher." That adult slayer smirked at him. "You hate your name, you're the one who changed it."

"I know." She grinned at Cala. "I'll share him with you if I need to?"

"Sure. That'll work for me." Xander nodded that was fine. "Is it set?"

"Yup. I gave the recommendations to Giles earlier and he's made them rules." The girls all smiled. "So we're getting help; it's just slow help."

"We were thinking if you're going to be training near here, we'd help you set up a house for them," Tommy said.

Xander looked at him. "You want me to stay here?"

"Yeah. You're my kid. Your place is here with me." Xander grinned. He gave his head a nudge with a hand. "We'll look at where to put a training center."

"Mom's old house is empty."

"Your biological mother?" Buckaroo asked.

"Yeah. I've been looking her up to see what she's doing now. She's hiding like hell from the Devon coven because she's a rogue witch. She's got a nice family line house. Has a few trees, has some space. Has a magical workroom." The others nodded. "I wrote her and she signed it over to me. She was appalled that they made me a watcher. She wanted me to become a chaos mage."

"How far away is it?" Tommy asked.

"Halfway across town." He pointed with a grin.

"That old wreck? It's falling in, Xander."

"That's an illusion. I walked through it earlier this week. It needs a lot of scrubbing, some paint, and a few new shingles."

"Uh-huh. It looks like a wreck."

"The porch looks like hell but it's structurally sound." He shifted the kids so he could shift.

Two of the coven appeared. "Let us get them home, Xander."

"We can watch them for a few days," Tommy offered.

"One's got chicken pox."

"We're taking them to Cleveland. Buffy wants to have a whole slayer meeting."

Xander stared at her. "Thanks for telling me," he said dryly.

"She was going to have us snatch you," the other said with a grin. "Chicken pox?" Xander pointed. "That'll work. Poor dear." She picked her up. "Come along. We'll get you a good bath and put you into a comfortable bed."

"Want Xander," she whined.

"I'll be there tomorrow," Xander said, sitting up to kiss her on the ear. "Go nap off the spots." She nodded, still pouting. "Buffy can get you ice cream or jell-o."

"Like jell-o," she said quietly, looking at the witch.

"We can help you get some. It's a good thing when you're sick." She and the other witch got all the slayers back to the house.

Xander looked up then at his dad, shrugging. "No idea. No vision yet. Maybe it's not a weird thing."

"We can only hope not," Buckaroo said. "You think she would?"

"Those two witches have never been that nice to anyone, much less me or a slayer." Yup, there was the vision pain. He grabbed his father's arm as it hit hard and fast. "Fuck." He patted himself down, eyes squeezed shut. His phone got handed to him. "Call Giles." It rang once he had it on speaker. "Giles, vision. Stop Romona from making Buffy set everyone on fire," he groaned, letting his father go so he could hold his head. "She's being a dumb bitch. I just saw me frantically looking for my emergency teleporting stone to stop the spelled Buffy from spreading gas in the house." He hung up and sighed, getting up and running to throw up.

"That's bad," Tommy said, following him.

"I'll start those herbs seeping for him," Buckaroo said, heading to grab them from the lab. He had been trying to figure out what was in it. It wasn't that hard to make tea for Xander. He made it strong just in case because he wasn't sure of the dosage. He found Tommy walking Xander to the infirmary and followed with the mug of steaming, nasty smelling tea.

Xander took it to gulp, wincing. "Ow. Smells worse than Groo's butt but works." He laid down, covering his face with the pillow. "Thanks."

"Welcome," Buckaroo said. "That whole thing was for one cup?" The pillow nodded. "Want me to brew the other one?"

"You can reuse it but not for four hours. I get two brews out of mine."

"Okay." He went to bag it up and let it dry out for later brewing.

Tommy settled next to his son, putting water down beside the bed and picking up a magazine to flip through. "We need to deal with the beings that send those."

"This time I'm happy I got it but you can't get C-4 where they are," Xander mumbled.

Tommy smiled. "We can figure something out."

"Yup. Been trying to. Of course if I do, they'll punish me by making Buffy take me shopping or trying to kill me again." Tommy snorted. "Shopping with girls is like facing a firing squad."

"I'll take you. That way you don't have to fear the bra shopping."

"I'd hug you but I'll probably throw up if I move."

"You can hug me later." Xander drifted off. His son had some screwed up fears if he thought shopping was that bad. Maybe therapy?

***

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