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The Cart of Culin....The Chest of Chaotic Implements!

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The Cart of Culin....The Chest of Chaotic Implements!





The young man and woman carried in the big wooden and metal trunk to the sanctuary building. The woman dropped her end with a sigh of relief and leaned on the top of the trunk fanning her face. The guy grinned at the staring people. "Hi. I won these artifacts last night at a poker game and was wondering if anyone wanted to buy any of them."

"What is that trunk?" one of them asked. It looked like the trunk you thought of when someone said 'pirate treasure'. Plain brown wood, metal straps around it and metal old style lock plate.

"It's the cart of culin....sorry, was watching tv late last night. It's the Crate of Chaos Inducing Incidences from what I translated." He pointed at a line of writing. "That's what that translates to. Opening it meant that the top ones blew my fragile mind with the thoughts of the chaos they would cause."

The sorcerers walked over to examine the trunk and the top content box. The insides were blank with extra space charms. You could only see the top boxed artifact and hints of a second box. The top box had a group of diamond shaped manacles with chains hanging off but not attached to anything. "Any idea what this is?"

The guy grinned. "It's Brandurst Bonding Bracelets. Attach them to two people and they're mystically married to the point of soulmating and sharing thoughts, diseases, and injuries. You can add up to four people to any grouping. I accidentally dropped the other one into the box and haven't gotten to it yet."

The head sorcerer stared at him then at the bracelets. "Is it temporary?"

"Nope." The girl grinned. "It's been used to start whole new bloodlines of skills though. The magic on it will make the second joined adapt so they can bear young if they're both of one gender." The sorcerer blinked a few times. She shrugged but smiled at him. "Saw it in the book." She pointed at the handwritten book she had dropped in there. "The pink bookmark."

He pulled out the book carefully so the manacles didn't touch his bare skin, turning to the pink bookmark to read up on them. "That could cause much chaos." He carefully put the book back into the artifact box. "We can store them safely."

The guy stared at him. "I'm not looking for that. I can solve a lot of problems with that set." He grinned a bit then made himself stop. "I'm willing to sell to others who want to solve problems with them but I'm trying to be a good boy who protects others."

The woman looked at him then shook her head. "Yeah, sometime he's like that, people." She grinned at the sorcerer. "It could be a lot worse. That book lists a whole lot of other chaos inducing artifacts somewhere in the trunk if it's right. I mean, there's one in there to change gender itself."

"The Deermere choker," the guy said with a nod. "Very versatile. Just a bit funky since only the one who puts it on can take it off."

"Which could help," the female reminded him. "The disguise won't be ended by someone else."

The sorcerer was getting that butt clenching, this is a problem feeling. He picked up the book to look at that artifact. What he saw impressed him because multiple chaos gods had worked together on it but his butt clenched hard enough to never let him fart again because that thing could be dangerous in the wrong hands. Or even the right hands probably. He carefully put the book back again, staring at them. "I believe it'd be better if they were stored."

The guy grinned. "Nah. It's a waste of a poker winning and the guy I won it from said he'd take it back and use it on others if we put it into hiding." He shut the trunk. "So I guess we'll figure it out. Thanks, guys." They picked up the trunk and walked it off before the sorcerers could say anything.

The head sorcerer looked at the others. "We must warn people. That ...will be disturbing at the very least." He still couldn't let himself relax. "That choker they mentioned will cause everyone havoc."

The other sorcerers called their friends to warn them. Things like that were drawn to magic users. Especially things that would cause them to fix things that were causing chaos.

(Sent to list via email to here)

The two owners let the artifacts loose and settled in to watch the chaos. After all, a female and male Xander were good chaos inspiration. And if one of them stroked her special choker, which had an identical twin from another realm in the trunk, then the male Xander didn't really mind. He did so like artifacts himself after all.

"So let's see what our babies are doing," she said, starting the scrying spell....
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