Note: the song, as well as the avengers mcu, got moved back in timeline. It's too recent and until it got found by the list, I thought it was a 90's song but it fits so well. So the mcu is moved back to 2015ish and fits in the hp timeline by the ones going back a bit farther.
The League Of Extraordinary Assholes Comes to Hogwarts
There was a huge battle. Someone had a radio going off to one side. No one was sure where it was coming from or who had the radio but it was nice they had a soundtrack this time. Even though it meant there were a few who hated the pop music playing. More people were coming in to aid one side or another, both sides were pretty evenly matched this time.
Things were feeling a bit weird though and no one had really noticed it. The energy fields were being warped into swirls instead of waves. The people incoming were making it worse by adding more eddies in the energy. It probably would've helped if they hadn't had this battle on a site of a former mystical battle. One from the Indigenous legends from the tribes in Canada.
The song changed and someone hummed along with it, he knew this song. He even sang the chorus "I miss my mom, I miss my friends...." A few of the others looked at him but he wasn't slacking in his part of the fight. He was just enjoying the song and they didn't like that, neither side liked that. But oh well!
And then the energy fields farted. It sounded like a fart. It felt like they were farted when they were moved. They came out the other side in a sound and wind explosion that was the universe farting basically. Though, they appeared somewhere they hadn't been.
The fighters that had been moved stopped suddenly and looked around. Even the wrong side had stopped fighting for a second. "This isn't Canada," one male voice said, being obvious.
One of them looked at his smart watch, staring at it. "We're in Scotland," he said. He looked up and then around. "This is a charming set of woods. We're in mid-Scotland."
"How do you know?" one of the heroes demanded.
The other one waved his wrist. "My smart watch connects to a satellite for updates." The others sighed. "But we are probably not home as this is not ...there's a town here in our reality."
The hero bit his tongue for a moment to take a calming breath. Then the other hero with them looked at him then at the one with the watch. "How would you know?"
"I attended a semester of college nearby. I used to take the wife there for picnics. She thought it charming," he said, staring at him. That got a wince but a nod. "While it was a mission, I enjoyed it immensely and we did stop the terrorist who was going to blow up a few governments. I got to finish my last few classes before going back to report for duty." He swallowed down the grief and rage again, tipping his chin up as he sighed. "No sorcerers?" he called.
"No," Sam Wilson called back. "Me and Bucky. You and your two." He frowned, testing his comm device. "No answer but I'm not shocked," he told himself. "Not that it's shocking if we're in another reality." He looked at the other three. Then at Bucky. "You good?"
"I'm fine," he said, pushing his hair back. "This sucks."
"This does fucking suck," Zemo agreed, testing his watch again to see what sort of connection he had. "We have satellites at least. So we're not in caveman times. The updated time and date...is we're in 1996. Interesting. I didn't know there was a Stark satellite in space then." He considered it then sighed. He checked his phone that had been hidden in his jacket, no signal.
He checked around then linked his watch as a wifi spot to do a quick internet search. "Yes, we're in early March 1996. Hmm, I forgot how messy the old internet was with banner ads." He got onto another site. "That's charming." He looked up at his kind-of teammates. They were all assholes but one had been humming. "What song were you singing just then?"
"Why would it matter?"
"It may be why we're in this charming woods," he said slowly and clearly because he thought the boy was a bit slow. "None of the rest of us wanted to be here in Scotland." The others shook their heads. "So.... The name of the song?"
"Umm, _The World Keeps Spinning_ by a band called Theory Of A Deadman." He sung a bit of it looking confused.
Zemo looked at him, then looked up everyone's name. "Your parents here survived but not their business." He looked up again, tucking his phone back into the hidden, shielded pocket. "This realm doesn't even have us as books or comic books. I looked up Avengers and there's only the old British tv show. Wilson, your family is here but not you or your sister, they had one son named Jamieson."
Sam looked up as he moaned. "Great. So true alternate reality but it means we won't run into ourselves."
"With one exception." He looked at that teammate. "You do have a version here but you're a girl."
He nodded once. "That's weird. In Scotland?"
"In Chicago."
"Oh, that's fun." He sighed, rubbing his face. Helmut looked at the Red Guardian then at the other one, Harry Osborn. "Are there any other things you have found?" the Red Guardian asked.
"Not much. Though there's an energy field nearby. My phone was wobbling and it's interfering with the wifi signal my watch gave me."
"We can probably find a way home," Harry said. He was the youngest of the group and really annoying to everyone else in the group. Especially Zemo. "Maybe we can find someone magical to send us home? I can't wait to get back to my sled." He looked at himself.
Zemo looked at the others, who were rolling their eyes, then shot Harry in the head, killing him. "Had enough of that last year. Thank you." He put the gun back.
Bucky stared at him. "Was that necessary?"
"Do you want to keep what little sanity you have?" he shot back, staring at him. "Because I would and he will not allow that."
Sam sighed. "Boy was annoying...." he started to say and then the body went up in a fizzle of energy. "Hmm."
"Well, he was a clone," Zemo noted. "Probably a self destruct if he got too far away from his father. Though I'm not sure if the original was any better." He sighed, adjusting his jacket. "Barnes, what's that way?" he asked with a hand wave. "I hear...voices."
He turned that way to listen, frowning. "I hear horses maybe? It sounds like hooves."
Sam nodded, checking himself. At least he had the shield and his guns and his UAV bird. Though it was unpowered at the moment. He tucked it into his pack again to make sure it'd be safe until he could charge it. Bucky had his guns and a few knives on him like usual, plus his bigger gun he was putting under his jacket before they got joined so no one got upset at the sight of the automatic field weapon.
The Red Guardian was hiding his own guns and knives in their holsters, what little he could hide in his uniform. Zemo's were all tucked here and there subtly in his jacket and on his person as usual. He never showed all of what he had to anyone, he had lived like that for years. It had saved him many times. The only seen weapon was his pistol in his thigh holster.
The four stared at the centaurs that showed up with bows and arrows ready to shoot them. "Hello, we were displaced to this charming forest from our own reality," Zemo said, staring at them. "Where are we beyond Scotland?"
"How do you know you're there?" one demanded.
"My smartwatch gave me a location." He waved his wrist. "Where, exactly, are we so we can plot how to get home somehow to our own world?"
"You're in the Forbidden Forest," one said. "Near Hogwarts."
Three of the four shared a look then at him. "Is that a college?" Sam asked.
"A school, not a college," the young one said, moving closer. "Who be you?"
"I'm Sam Wilson. This is Bucky Barnes. That's Helmut Zemo, and that's ..."
"Alexei Shostakov." He nodded politely. This was creeping him out some, he had always thought these things were fairytales yet now he was facing a fairytale. Yelena would be most amused at that, then get to drinking the ideas away.
The centaurs looked at each other then at them. "We will tell the headmaster. See what he wishes to do."
"We can get out of the forest to meet him," Zemo offered. "We would be polite and cordial around any students and not cause any harm unless prompted to. That way you don't have to worry about our actions or persons."
"Yeah, we'll be peaceful sorts around any kids," Bucky said, looking at the others, getting no disagreement. Which was nice because Osborn might have disagreed but that clone was now not a problem.
"That would be fine. He can come to the edge of the forest," one said. "Let me tell Hagrid." He trotted off.
"This way," one of them said, leading them after the young one. They were escorted, still being surrounded by weapons but not actively threatened at the moment.
One of the centaurs looked at the people. "The stars told of your coming," he told Sam quietly. "But I was not sure of the meaning of this visit. It appears they were correct again."
Sam looked at him, nodding some. "I have no idea about how that convergence would happen."
"Me either, but it is interesting." They kept walking toward the school.
The headmaster came out at the calls from Hagrid. "Yes, Hagrid, is it an emergency?"
"We 'ave visitors in the forest from some other world," he said. "Centaurs tol' me."
"Oh, dear. What's happened," he muttered, heading that way with Hagrid behind him. Fang was following his human happily. It was a good time for a walk and maybe some playing with the centaurs who could pet if they were being decent today.
The headmaster nodded at the four men. "How did you get into our forest, gentlemen?"
"We have no idea," Sam admitted. "We were in a battle. There was music. Then there was a feeling of being sucked and farted out into the woods." He shrugged. "I have no idea how that works."
He looked at the others. "Where are you all from?"
"We're Americans," Bucky said. "He's Sokovian, he's Russian," he said with a point.
"Ah." He nodded. "Sokovia is where?"
"Central Europe," Zemo said. "Do we not exist here? That is something I did not check."
"How did you check?" Dumbledore asked.
He pushed up his sleeve. "My smartwatch connects to a satellite. I looked ourselves up to see if we had other selves here. Only one does." He pointed at Alexei. "But she's a female."
"Well, that means you're probably very far off your own reality." Dumbledore sighed. "I can call the Ministry to see if they can help you find someone who may know how to get home."
"There are sorcerous orders on our reality," Sam agreed. "Who are probably very peeved. Strange is just like that sometimes."
"We would be glad of the help," Bucky agreed. "And we'd never hurt a kid. Even those two wouldn't hurt a kid and they're former military."
Dumbledore nodded. "That's fine, gentlemen. We'll call them from inside. I don't have a fireplace out here at the moment. It got removed last year." He walked them up to the school with Hagrid following.
Bucky grinned, petting the dog. "Hey, buddy. You're a good dog," he said quietly.
"That's Fang. 'E's a good boy," Hagrid agreed happily. "Helps me with tha classes and the groundskeeper stuff. Thanks, boys." The centaurs nodded, going back into the forest. Bucky kept petting the dog, it seemed to like it. He frowned. "Why is your hand silver?"
"It's a replacement arm." He shrugged a bit. "I lost it years ago."
"Hmm," Dumbledore said. "I hope our lack of technology won't bother that."
"If so, I can take it off and deal without it," he assured him.
Zemo looked at his watch then at him. "Barnes, do a flex to check. We're within the field that was wobbling my wifi."
He did that and frowned. "No, it works."
"So it's probably shielded from magic. Which was nice of whoever did that."
Sam Wilson looked at him. "Why would they do that?"
"Sorcerer Strange," he shot back with a look. "Or Maximoff. Who I'm sorry to say is Sokovian until she gets help."
"Point," Sam admitted. "It could be a good idea around the team." He looked at Bucky, who shrugged. "Did you have anything this week?"
"Therapy like usual." He grimaced. "It'll be handled I'm sure."
"Probably," Alexei agreed. "Mine would be." He looked at the school/castle. "Melina would be amused," he said quietly. "She likes castles."
Zemo looked up and nodded. "It is a fine fortress. Ancient design so probably around at least seven hundred years old."
"Yes," the headmaster said with a smile for him. "Over a thousand years old actually."
"It's great it lasted this long," Sam said. "So many fell thanks to wars and decay."
"Yes, we do keep her up with all the magic inside her walls. The students power her with their training. She absorbs the off-put energy." The four men nodded at that. Zemo checked his watch again, seeing it was fine. It wasn't shielded from magic. That was interesting. He glanced at Bucky but his arm worked just fine as well. Not Sam's equipment or Alexei's gear but theirs. That was very interesting while leading his mind toward who could have summoned them. But he wouldn't share his ideas. Yet.
They walked inside and looked at the portraits, which were everywhere. It was more crowded than a museum. No one mentioned that, they didn't want to piss off this headmaster. He might have a way to get them home. Even though all of them thought the wallpapering of moving portraits was a bit tacky.
The headmaster let them into the office. "Let me call. Cornelius will be horrified but the rest of the ministry may have an idea." He called Mysteries. "It's Dumbledore," he said when the fire connected. A head joined the fire. "We had four people appear in the forest from another reality." He waved a hand at them. "They had apparently been at a battle and something sucked them here."
"We don't know much about reality traveling or time traveling, Headmaster Dumbledore. It is forbidden by Ministry decree."
"I know our reality has an order of sorcerers who are mostly monks," Sam told him. "They have a headquarters in New York City and a training center in some mystical city in Tibet. Do we have something like them here?"
"I have no idea," the official admitted. He turned his head to say that to someone then turned back. "Destroyed during World War 2 by Nazis unfortunately."
"There's still probably a few hiding then," Bucky said, considering it. "I wonder if Wong's here."
Zemo looked him up on his watch, frowning at it. "According to the dark web yes, there is a member. He's in India at a temple. He's the head of the order." He put his wrist back down. "But I have no idea how we'd get to him or if he could help."
Sam nodded. "We may be able to send him a letter to see."
"We can do that. We have official ties with their ministry," the official offered. "His name is Wong?"
"That is the name he goes by in our world," Bucky agreed. "He's bald, a monk, a powerful sorcerer. Backs up our Sorcerer Supreme as his second-in-command. Pretty nice guy though. Likes tv."
"That's really weird but we can see if they know of him at least. Headmaster, do you want us to move them to London or keep them there so they can't interfere?"
"We do have some rooms in a quiet tower they can take up for a few days as they've said they would not harm the children. Two were former military."
"All four of us were former military, Headmaster," Sam said. "Bucky and I were both US military. Zemo was Sokovian military. Alexei was Russian military."
"That's interesting. Was the battle a military one?" he asked, looking at them.
"No, we were having a full on hero battle," Alexei said dryly. "Fighting in Canada. How we got here...."
"Canada's got protections in some areas to send away anything coming in. You can't even apparate into it," the official told them. "So it'd send you to somewhere that wasn't as protected."
"We appeared in the forest," Sam said. "Could it have pulled us here instead of say a city in Canada or if they have a school like this there?"
"Their school you can't get into or anywhere near but if you had that would've sent you to another school possibly. Which would explain some things I suppose. I'll get that letter sent tonight, Headmaster. Maybe they can share experiences with some of your students."
"Perhaps," he agreed with a nod. "Some could use it."
"That's fine then. Let them maybe work on defense or something." He shrugged but disappeared and the fire went out a moment later.
Dumbledore looked at them. "Let us get you set up into a room, gentlemen." He led them up to an unused set of guest rooms. He got a house elf in to dust it for them and change the sheets to clean ones.
Alexei looked around the room. "This is much nicer than the prison."
"Prison?" Dumbledore asked.
"Russia has had a lot of social problems and the former order fell in the last decade," Zemo told him, arching an eyebrow up. "The Iron Curtain fell hard on the people, which led to a few revolutions and the like. Alexei was not a bad sort, just a commander of a specialist group within Russia."
"That's fine then. I was hoping he wasn't there for a bad reason."
Bucky shrugged. "I had been a soldier in World War 2 but I got put into cyrogenic freezing until they woke me up a few years back. Russian soldiers are good at what they do." He looked at Alexei then at the headmaster again. "He's not going to hurt a student."
"No, I had many I helped train," Alexei said with a nod. "Though their methods were not one that are pleasant to some we do not do that anymore as they Fell greatly. I led women into battle for many years on small group combat missions."
"That's very interesting. I had no idea Russia had specialty female units."
Alexei nodded. "Many times men underestimate women. They are often the best weapon that can be deployed."
He nodded. "I know a few aurors like that." He smiled. "I'll let you settle in. We'll send dinner up so I can warn the students you're here so they don't panic." He left.
Sam was watching the house elf work. "What are you guys?"
The house elf flinched, staring at him. "We is house elves."
"Do you exist in our reality?" Bucky asked.
"Have no idea. Willey not know your reality. If so, are probably hidden from muggles who have no magic."
"We can ask the sorcerers when we get home," Bucky decided with a nod. "Thank you for that."
Willey smiled. "Is not big things. Saves Willey from cutting onions for dinners." He finished up and left them to settle in. It was a suite that had two double rooms.
Sam looked at the rooms. "Bucky, this side's ours."
"Sure," he agreed, going to look. It was an older feather mattress. "Feather bed," he called.
"Those are nice," Zemo admitted, going to test his. Alexei took the one nearest the window. Which was fine with him, he had the doorway. They could settle in and figure out how to handle this in a truce so they didn't attack each other. Though they were wary of a school full of children with magic.
They all heard an explosion and looked out a window. Then sighed at the students having an argument. Bucky picked up something and tested the weight but a teacher came out to yell at them, shooing them inside. Bucky looked at Sam, who took the little ball thing and put it back for him. "It's kids, Bucky."
"I know. They're loud kids."
"Kids should be loud and happy."
"True. I hope these kids are getting to do that." He laid down, sighing at the canopy. This was like he had seen when he was younger. Though his bed never had a canopy or this thick of a mattress.
Sam went to the other room, looking at them. "I know Zemo will accept a truce because we had one a bit ago to work together. You?" he asked the one he didn't know. "Can we work together peacefully and have a truce through this incident to make sure cause the kids any problems?"
"Yes, I have no problem with that. I am not a monster."
"Didn't think you were," Sam told him. "I know what your former position with Widows was, and I know Natasha well enough to know how she's trained. I know she'd never attack kids and I doubt you would, but I have no idea if you and Bucky would have a problem. Or you and I."
The Red Guardian stared at him. "I admire Bucky for surviving so long," he admitted. "I have wanted to fight Rogers again many times. I will study you to see if you're a worthy enemy to join that wish list." Hes mirked. "But we can all be nice enough to each other."
"Thank you. I don't want to have the kids see us fighting each other."
"Heroes like you are basically only comic books here. The children may enjoy seeing real ones," Zemo said.
Sam nodded. "And I'm okay with teaching some who want to learn something I know. I just don't want to worry about us having a smack down in front of the kids."
Zemo nodded. "They are children and should hopefully be happy children. You know I will not. Though I may play some mind games," he said a smirk.
"Yeah, we expect that of you," Sam assured him, cracking up Alexei. "We had to work with him in Madripor to stop the super serum."
Alexei nodded at that. "That was important work. Very nice of you to do, Wilson." He smirked a bit. "I will be a nice, normal person here. I have done undercover work. He has done undercover work. Bucky has probably as well. You?"
"I'm a normal guy mostly," he admitted dryly. "I just fly." He smirked a bit.
Zemo nodded, looking at his roommate. "He is rather normal."
"That can be an asset. We would think of things differently probably."
Zemo nodded. "Probably." He looked at Sam. "Your worry-wart mothering habits are returning perhaps?" he asked dryly.
"Maybe. I just think we'd creep the kids out."
"Perhaps. I'm not wearing a uniform like you and Alexei are." They groaned but nodded at that idea. "Hopefully there's a way to get regular looking clothes so we're not advertising."
Sam looked at himself then at Alexei's uniform. "True, we could use regular shirts." Alexei looked at himself and nodded at that idea. "We'll see what we can figure out tomorrow probably." He went back to talk to Bucky.
Zemo looked at Alexei again. "In his off time he counsels returning veterans from wars."
"Ah. That is a necessary task," he agreed with a nod. "Many could use it. I could've used it."
"I know many who could have as well." He laid down again, getting comfortable while thinking about things. This was very odd and there was a slight mystery there.
***
At breakfast the next morning, it was Sam who realized the kids weren't happy kids. He finished up, nodding at the kid staring at him. "I'm Sam Wilson."
"Ron Weasley." He shook his hand. "How did you get here?"
"We were having a battle in a field in Canada and then there was a sucking feeling, some wind, and we appeared in the forest."
"It felt like a fart," Bucky said then finished his tea.
Ron giggled. "Magic can do that. There's whole spells the fourth years love because it gives off fart noises."
"Seriously, Ron?" Hermione sighed, looking at him. "Did you have to go there?"
He scowled at her. "It's fine. They're adults."
"Yes, and we should not act like first years around them because of that."
He rolled his eyes. "Whatever, Hermione."
"Honestly," she muttered, buttering her last bite of muffin to eat.
Zemo smiled at her. "It's his age, dear. All boys are like that during certain times of their growing up."
"Really?"
He nodded. "The same as girls become gossipy and giggly for a bit."
"Yes, some are." She nodded, looking down the table then at him. "Which one are you, sir?"
"Baron Helmut Zemo, colonel in Sokovia's military."
"Sokovia? Is that a former part of Germany or one of the Eastern block countries?"
"Eastern block."
"So they got absorbed when Germany and other countries consolidated?"
"Apparently here. In ours we did not."
"That's weird how history can change so much."
"It means they're probably farther away from our reality," a female teacher said as she came over. "Gentlemen, I'm Deputy Headmistress McGonagall. I handle the daily things." She smiled slightly. "The children are curious if you know things they do not."
"In ours, we have actual heroes who go into battle against giant problems," Sam said. Then he grinned. "I've fought a few aliens in the last few years. Weirded me out but had to be done."
She blinked a few times. "You...like in a comic book?"
"Yes, just like that," Zemo said with a nod and a smirk. "He's actually a newer one, he took over an older position in the last three years."
"Oh." She nodded. "That's very weird."
"Yes, we think so too," Bucky agreed with a grin. "I feel the same way about it during them."
Alexei shrugged. "Aliens are nicer than some we have fought." He sipped his tea, then refilled the cup. It was low caffeine tea but tasty enough.
Sam nodded. "Also true. Some of them were pretty neat to talk to, like Rocket, but some of them...." He shrugged. "I could do without seeing ever again."
"Ditto," Bucky agreed dryly. "Including protecting my arm from Rocket."
"Your...arm?" Hermione asked. He waved his metal hand. "Oh!" She nodded. "A prosthetic. Aliens might find that different enough to want to examine it I suppose."
"He liked shiny things," Bucky said dryly, staring at her.
"It is rather shiny," she agreed with a smile. "I can see why." He nodded, so she looked at the teacher. "Is the test this week or next, Professor?"
"Next, Miss Granger. Didn't you put it on your calendar this time?"
"Yes, but someone nicely poured water in my bag." She stared at her.
"Sorry," Dean called from his seat.
Hermione sighed. "Some day I'll repay the favor, Dean."
"Sure, Hermione."
She looked at the teacher again. "I've got most of them from Harry's calendar but I think I'm missing a few. Can I have you glance at it tonight?"
"Yes, of course. Before dinner?"
"Please. I'm not sure which teachers I'm missing."
"That's fine, Miss Granger. Where is Mr. Potter?"
"Sleeping in apparently."
"He had nightmares," Ron said simply. "Needed to sleep. Took a potion."
"That's reasonable." She walked off to tell the other teachers that. Snape glared at her but oh well. Umbridge was looking upset. "They seem very pleasant," she noted. "They have comic book hero sorts in their world. Mr. Wilson is apparently one."
Dumbledore looked at her then at Sam. "That's very interesting. They didn't note more than they had all been former military members." He hummed but dug into his eggs again.
"All US?" she asked casually.
"One Russian, one Sokovian, which apparently does not exist here, and the other two were American." He looked at her. "Mr. Barnes said that he had been a soldier in World War 2 but he got injured and cryogenically frozen?"
"That is nonsense," Umbridge complained.
"No it's not," Snape told her. "It's what we do with the freezing charm for potions ingredients so they don't decay. Doing so on a human has been done for short periods for serious injuries so they had time to work on them." She gaped. He stared back. "That is that preservation spell, that's what it does." He looked at them. "At his apparent age he was probably under it for quite a while." He dug into his own breakfast again.
Bucky tracked the owls coming in, staring at them oddly. "What is going on?" He was tensing up for an attack. So was Alexei.
"It's the mail," Hermione told them. Then she smiled. "They're bringing mail, daily papers, things like that." She accepted one, smiling and letting the owl have some of her meat. "There you go and thank you, dear." It flew off to go roost on the roof. She got into her paper, reading the front page with a grimace. "That's...not true. As usual." She went on.
"The Daily Prophet isn't known for telling more than rumors," Ron reminded her.
"Yes it's a shame they don't have the journalistic integrity of the London Times. They also have a lot of different sections, including a usually difficult crossword I enjoy doing." She blinked a few times but went on scanning the news for anything realistic and true. It was a hard hunt, and usually not profitable, but sometimes she found something. "Hmm. Neville," she said quietly, handing him the paper. He looked when she pointed then huffed. She patted him on the arm after taking her paper back.
"That would be a nice conference to attend," he decided. "But it's during the year. How do they expect students and future herbologists to attend?"
"No idea," she admitted then smiled at him. "Perhaps you can get a leave of absence for that week?"
"Maybe," he agreed with a nod. "It's nearly test time though." He grimaced. "Maybe next time."
"There's one in late December," she offered, showing it to him.
"That one I might be able to go to," he agreed, smiling at her. "Thanks."
"You're welcome. Though I have no idea why the paper has personals in it. It's very trite. Especially this one looking for a virgin veela to court so he has to learn manners." He looked and snorted, sounding amused.
Ron looked at his, then sighed. "That's so trashy."
"Yes, it is. All men should have manners by the time they're old enough to be looking for a mate. It'd be great if they did." She turned the page. Neville snickered into his pumpkin juice because she was clearly going at Ron again.
Ron rolled his eyes. "Real men don't use manners like you think they do," he complained.
"My mother would've taken a strap to me if I was rude to girls," Bucky told him. "Manners are for everyone until they prove themselves unworthy."
Ron groaned. Helmut nodded. "Indeed. Even then, you use them to make them see the errors of their ways by being politely snide yet smiling through it so it's subtle. Your example shows them how poorly off they are acting."
Hermione smiled at him. "Thank you! Yes, you do, that's what I learned as well. It's sad so many boys in this school have no manners." She glared at another table but got back to her paper.
"You don't use fancy manners," Ron complained.
She stared at him. "I do use table manners. I do use regular manners. I may not always use them when someone has been tragically annoying but I at least chew with my mouth closed." He shut his mouth to finish chewing. She went back to her paper while Neville tried not to laugh.
"Mum never cared," Ron complained.
Ginny looked down at him. "I remember all the times you got yelled at for that. Yes she did. You ignored it." Ron rolled his eyes and stuffed his mouth again. She smiled. "Sorry about my brother. We think Mum dropped him on his head a few too many times."
"Hey!" he complained.
Ginny stared at him. "Mouth, open, with food." He swallowed with a huff. She looked at the other boys in Ron's year. "You guys don't do that at least, even if you do slam doors in girls' faces and let them fall but don't offer help."
Hermione looked at her then at the boys then back at her. "Some people can be that way. That's why women are so strong, because we do it on our own." She smiled. "We learned that by the application of no one coming to our aid when we fall down a flight of stairs and break an ankle." She put the paper aside and dug into breakfast.
"Padma, how is the ankle?" Ginny called.
"It's healed, just a bit stiff," she called back. "Thank you for asking."
"Welcome." The boys in hearing all groaned. The girls were mad at them again. But it happened a lot some months.
Bucky held in the comment about how his mother would've heard he didn't help if he was there, shown up that night, and beaten him with a switch. Sam was holding in the same thought. The other two were shaking their heads.
"What did you guys do before you got sent?" Ron asked. "Beyond Mr. Wilson?"
"I ran a covert intelligence group for Sokovia and then a private one when our country had a problem that meant a lot died," Zemo said, staring at him. "Alexei ran a small, covert group of female soldiers who handled various missions. Though Russia wasn't...gentle about it as many had been orphans." He looked at him.
Ron thought about that. "So girls fighting?"
"Many girls got taught many skills. Including infiltration, spying, assassination," he offered then smirked. "I trained a number to be excellent at it but Russia at that time did not care about people. They only cared about goals. Thankfully that has changed since communism fell and we became more democratic. Not fully but partially. There's still many problems but we are going through what normal countries go through when they have complete regime changes."
"Like in the French revolution," Hermione said with a nod. "Their first one got overthrown and introduced to the same deaths they gave the monarchy."
"Indeed," Helmut agreed. "I doubt Russia would go back to a monarchy, though a few Romanovs do exist to this day in our time."
Alexei nodded. "It's where they fled the revolution." He sipped his tea and put the cup down gently. Then finished his food.
Ron stared at him. "What about your magical world over there?"
"No idea," Alexei said. "We don't tend to hide in enclaves completely. If you know where to look you can find people who use such skills but the average person doesn't really pay attention to it until something huge happens."
Zemo nodded. "The Sorcerer Supreme's people aren't exactly hidden, but they're not out holding parades either."
Neville shifted to look at them. "Do they use wands?"
"No, they have magical figures around their hands as they work," Bucky told him. "Including portals and the like."
"That's gotta be harder than with a wand," Ron admitted, considering that. "Is that a whole different type of magic you think, 'Mione?"
She looked at him. "If they don't need a foci to channel it's possible. I have no idea. We do have some people who use some magic wandlessly but they don't have figures around their hands. Like runes?" Zemo nodded. "That is interesting. I wonder if you can learn their sort and ours."
She hummed, going back to checking her homework for spelling mistakes. She frowned, fixing that line with the magical white out spell she had found last year. Once it was dry she wrote over it to make it sound better. Then she moved on.
"Hermione, it's breakfast," Neville chided.
She looked at him. "I've eaten, Neville, and I'm checking the homework I did last night for mistakes before I hand it in later. That sudden paper is a pain she's causing." She went back to it. "Good teachers have their syllabus filled out completely so you know when things are upcoming. They don't just make it up as they go along."
Zemo hid his smirk at that complaint. "That is true, all of mine have. This one didn't?"
Hermione looked at him, shaking her head. "Not in the least. It really does go against all educational models for concise teaching." She grimaced. "Not that she's good at it," she said quietly, glaring at the top table then going back to her paper to finish the review. "We'll never pass OWLs with her not teaching what's on the test. The prep test book has a lot of things that haven't been covered."
"Bring that up," Zemo offered.
She stared at him. "She said that it's being changed and the test prep books were illegal by ministry standards, considered cheating."
"That's never been true," he assured her.
Sam nodded. "I have a masters degree in counseling. It's not ever like that. Test prep books are to get you ready to take the test so you're used to the format and how the questions are asked."
"Exactly." She sighed, hearing the pink monstrosity laughing at something. "That woman is the worst," she said quietly. "But we will persevere." She looked at the first years. "Do you need new copies of my former notes?" she asked quietly.
"No, we have them, Hermione. Thank you."
"Welcome. You'll probably need them." She felt a chill and stared at the doorway. "Oh, let's not have that." She looked at the head table. "Professor, may I have a word?"
"No, Miss Granger," Umbridge called.
"I wasn't asking you, Professor Umbridge, I was asking the head of my house." She stared at her. Professor McGonagall came down to talk to her in a corner near the doorway. "Feel that?" she asked quietly.
She looked at her hand then sighed. "That's charming. Anything else to note?"
"I gave the first years a copy of my former notes," she said quietly, staring at her. "Which she'll probably yell at me for."
"I agree, that's a good thing to do." She smiled at her. "I'll go check on that and Mr. Potter."
She nodded. "Thank you, Professor." She sat back down.
Ron was looking at the hairs on his arm then nodding once. "Yeah, that's not good," he decided quietly. He and Hermione shared a look then with Neville, who nodded he had felt it. "Maybe I'll go ask Hagrid that question I had last night," Ron decided.
"I've got one for Madam Sprout," Neville said, looking at Hermione.
Who nodded. "I do as well. I'm sure Professor Snape will be mad but...." She shrugged. "It must be asked somehow before I do that homework." Snape was grimacing at his end of the table but looking outside. So something was going on. She looked down at the kids. "Wait for us to go with you, we need to ask a few questions about the homework we have," she told them quietly. They nodded, understanding that was a hint to let them be escorted to classes.
The four displaced adults shared a look. The kids weren't subtle but no one was paying attention to that? They decided to go with the children. "May we attend a class or two ourselves?" Zemo asked. "I have a delightful black thumb and perhaps she can teach me how to nurture my plants better."
"If you want and the headmaster doesn't mind," Hermione said. She smiled. "She did help mine. I used to kill the dandelions on our lawn and you know they never die until they fuzz up and blow off."
"I've killed ivy," he told her.
She giggled. "Me too. Twice now." He smiled at her. The bell rang so they went to classes with the kids. Neville and she walked around the first years. Ron had the second years safer. Hagrid's classes were close to the school.
Yup, there was a dementor. She stared at it, watching what it was going to do. As soon as it started to float closer she cleared her throat. "Nev, I've got it." She pulled her wand. "Expecto Patronum," she cast firmly, pointing her wand at it. It fled from it. She followed the students Neville had hurried into the greenhouse with the baron. She found the teacher, smiling at her. "Can we do the paper in green ink this time?" she asked with a smile. "I'm out of blue until we can hit town. Which you know she's forbidden."
"Yes, dear. You go right ahead," she assured her with a smile. "Nice work, Miss Granger. Five points."
She smirked. "It's needed sometimes." She walked off with Neville, who calmed down one student. The baron stayed to help with the kids. Ron's group was fine.
Neville looked at her. "Go to class," he said when he spotted Umbridge coming up the hallway. "She hates me less."
"Thank you, Neville." She patted him on the hand and headed for potions. Umbridge sneered at her but oh well. She smiled at the teacher as she squeaked in just at the bell. "Had to ask Madam Sprout a technical question for an assignment, Professor Snape. The kiddies were most happy to be walked out there to their daily dirt time." She sat down quickly.
Snape stared at her. "What else were you doing, Miss Granger?"
"I have no idea what you're speaking of, sir." She stared at him. "At all."
He grimaced. "Where is Mr. Potter?"
"He had to take a potion late last night from the nightmares," Ron told him. "About two. So he overslept. Should wear off in about a half-hour."
Snape grimaced. "I'm sure he'll love his deduction for being tardy to class then." He slammed the door and got to their lessons. He had heard yelling in a Gryffindor male voice.
"I am not going to stand there and let the students be eaten by some little bit of evil!" Neville said loudly. "If *you* do not care about the student's lives, some of us are better people! And if you don't like it, take it up with my grandmother, Lady Longbottom! I'm certain she'd love to hear from you about how you hated that I protected the first years." He walked around her. "If you'll excuse me, I have to go to class. You're making me late and Professor Snape hates that."
"I will have your wand snapped," she sneered. "For harming ministry property!"
He turned to stare at her. "My family owns part of the lease on the ministry's building. I can destroy any ministry property I want as long as my grandmother would agree to it." She gasped. "Some of us are better than human dementors, we care about people." He walked off again. "I'm going to the infirmary," he told the teacher staring at him. "She's given me a dreadful headache by screeching like a banshee." He slammed the door in his way.
The headmaster nodded. "I agree, Mr. Longbottom did the correct thing. We do not allow dementors near the students. Even when Cornelius sent them up here to try to catch Sirius Black they were not allowed near the students. I would hate to tell their parents that they died due to the ministry losing track of some of their dementors. I'm sure they'd love to sue them for it." He gave her a pointed look then walked off. He saw the staring man and shrugged. He got a nod back. "Is one of you out there?"
"He was hoping the teacher could help his black thumb," Sam Wilson said.
"I'm sure she could. She has with many students over the years."
"What are you staring at?" Umbridge demanded.
"Not you," Sam Wilson said dryly. "I wasn't looking your way at all, ma'am. I was taught to be a polite young man by my parents and then the US military. That's why I was an officer in a specialty flight based unit before I went to take over the mantle of Captain America." She shuddered, stomping off. He looked at the headmaster, who smirked a bit. "I was. My jetpack was a great thing and I still use it now." He walked off. "I'm going to work on my training. That way I don't get out of being able to throw the shield."
"If that's what you want and you don't disturb classes." He went to his office to note that there were dementors bothering the students on a multi headed call to the Wizengamet and Minister Fudge, who spluttered. He said they did not so Dumbledore took the heads out to show them the one on the edge of the woods. Then put them back to stare at him. "The children do need to feel safe," he said before hanging up. He smirked a bit. "Fifty points to Neville Longbottom for protecting his fellow students," he said quietly.
***
The four men met after lunch in their suite, looking at each other. "We can maintain the truce, right?" Bucky asked patiently. "Because I don't think these kids need any more stress than whatever they have right now. They all look like they're ready to snap."
"A few looked closer to snapping on someone," Zemo admitted. "I would never harm a child unless I had to. You know that."
"I do." He looked at Alexei, who nodded.
"I would not want them to become my former Widows," he admitted. "Though some shoring up of their strength may be needed. A few seemed very...unconcerned about the others."
Sam nodded. "Yeah, I'm seeing a few kids being the ones handling the stress or giving the stress out and the rest trying to avoid it. If we want to mentor it'd probably be a great thing for the kids. Just...don't expect them to be Natasha."
"No, none are like the Widows I trained." He looked outside then at them again. "They are mostly happy, it's good to see."
"It's excellent to see but the source of stress may become worrying," Helmut said dryly. He shifted, then grimaced. "Will it come toward us as well? And if so, can we battle that ourselves?"
"Even if it's magic we can probably do something," Bucky admitted. "Not sure what though and I'm hoping it's something between the houses. Are all schools sorted that way?"
"Many boarding ones are," Helmut said with a nod. "That way the students are in controllable bunches. Though there seems to be too few teachers by what I remember of my own schooling." He grimaced but let it clear up. "There should be house monitors or mothers or something like that and I haven't seen one."
"Huh," Sam said with a nod. "Not something I know anything about except college dorms. Then we did have a dorm monitor and RA's to handle the students. Do they lean on the older students for that maybe?"
Helmut shrugged. "I haven't looked or asked. We can find out."
Bucky nodded. "If we need to. Hopefully we can just give good advice if asked." He looked at Helmut, who smirked at that. "I know you're experienced outside all this."
"Yes, quite. And if asked I would give honest enough answers that would fit the situation and needs of the child at that time. It's not like I'm going to tell them how to lead a special operations unit. Unless one needs that knowledge."
"If so, they can ask me as well," Alexei noted.
"And me," Bucky agreed. "I just don't want us to make the kids any sort of stressed."
"No, we will not," Alexei said patiently. "The children should be children and happy, normal children not ones with special destinies or the like. If we find one that does and they need our experiences then we can share as we feel is needed."
"Thank you. Yeah, that's what I wanted. Because by rumors, we do have a destined kid hero thing going on." He looked at Sam, who grimaced. Then at the two villains. Which, if he had to be stuck with villains, at least these two were good guys part of the time and understandable in their actions. It wasn't Doom or someone psychotic like a few of the villains were. And they didn't have Spiderman here being a cheerful teenager.
Sam patted Bucky on the shoulder. "Quit thinking about how much worse this could've been."
"We could've had the Spiderkid," Bucky said, looking at him. "He was right behind me, between you and me."
Helmut frowned a bit then nodded. "That's true. Osborn was closer to where I was but Alexei was on the other side of the battle. Huh." He considered that, slotting it into the profile he was building his mind on what was going on. "Perhaps we bothered the energy there for some reason." Then why bring the clone of Osborn? Though it was nice he had disappeared quickly so they hadn't had to explain a body. Very interesting.
Alexei shook his head. "That is nothing I am concerned about."
Bucky nodded. "Me either." He looked at Sam, who shrugged but shook his head. "So we can stay at the truce level?" They all nodded. "Good. Anything good going on? I went out to see the animals they're learning. They have a lizard thing that shoots flaming farts to move."
"That's very odd," Helmut said dryly. "But do have fun with the animals. I'll probably ask to audit a few classes that are closer to what I've already studied. It could be quite interesting to learn a new skill this way." He got up and went to look outside. "Oh, we have a flying class apparently. It's the first years." They came to watch the kids learning how to fly around the school. They could work out any later problems.
***
Hermione was livid that night but oh well. Umbridge had tried to corner her to yell at her but she hadn't managed it without other students hearing. She had started it during charms class during an 'audit' so that was to be expected. Hermione felt humiliated but she knew she had done the right thing. She ran into Alexei on the stairs. "Excuse me, I need to go rant in a corner," she said quietly, walking around him.
"Are you well?" he asked.
She looked at him, shaking her head. "No, I'm about to rage so much I'm not sure if I'm going to scream, cry, or curse someone." She shot a look up the hall then at him. "Do watch out for the monster that wears pink," she said quietly, then walked off again. She did end up ranting, and crying a bit, but she felt better afterwards.
She took a deep breath, calming herself down. Then she cleaned herself up and went to lunch once she had her afternoon bag. She sat down, staring at the others who wouldn't look at her. She stared at them until they did. Was going dark really that bad of a thing? She wasn't completely sure at the moment.
Though she didn't like to hurt people. She considered it through lunch, then sighed when the bell rang and she had three bites left. She ate one last one before standing up. She took her sandwich with her to eat on the way out, finishing it before she crossed the door.
"Food does not leave the Great Hall," Umbridge shouted. "You know that, Miss Granger."
"And it didn't. I took my last bite and had swallowed it before I got to the doorway, madam." She stared at her. "I don't tend to break rules without reasonable cause." She walked off again, considering how dark she might end up. Was handling that one problem really *that* bad?
Ron looked at her. "Prison would suck," he told her simply.
She snorted. "Are you certain?"
"No wand to get rid of the dementors."
"That is a good point. Though...there's ways." She smiled at him. "People fought them off before they used wands." Ron winced, looking behind them. "I found the most charming ancient essay on that last year. Back from around 900 or so." She looked back, staring at the teacher.
"No such records exist, Miss Granger. We'd know and have them in our custody," Umbridge said smugly.
"Really? From the biggest college in Ireland? That's odd since they have their own ministry." She walked off again, going to her next class. "The UK is bigger than England and you're in Scotland, which also has their own Ministry. They may defer but it's their playground and we must follow the Scottish ministry's rules, Madam. Including their reporting duties." She walked into runes and sat down, smiling at the teacher. "We have a lot of homework to go over, correct?"
She looked up the hall then at her. "Not that much. Ireland's college library?"
"Yes." She smiled, pulling summoning her notebook for notes to find it and copy it for her. Then she tucked it into her bag again. She thought about it and banished it at her parents for now. Umbridge would try to search her trunk but most of the notes in there pertained to course work. And she had copies at home already. That folder she didn't have copies of.
The other one...that was iffy but also locked with a blood key lock spell. It was also protected from being burned. Just in case you know. The runes teacher looked up from reading, staring at her. "They had to do it somehow, I figured there was a way for those who didn't have that spell in their arsenal at this time."
"It seems that it would work at least part of the time." She put it aside. "Do be careful."
She smiled. "I will gladly take my top level grades and transfer," she said quietly. "France has offered me a full scholarship." She smiled. "So have two other schools."
The teacher smiled. "That's a great idea sometimes."
"Yes, perhaps." She stared at the hallway. Umbridge was probably listening but oh well. Let her try to intimidate the French government for that offer. The others came in and she nodded. "We don't have much homework today she said." She smiled at them.
"That's good since the defense teacher didn't preplan her homework so we have a two foot essay on her book's theory that you can do defense without using a spell."
Hermione nodded. "Well, there is physical self defense. There are weapons as well. That wouldn't be spell work to stab someone with a sword." She smirked a bit. "And it might be handy if they react to metal."
"I hadn't thought of that." She nodded. "That's a good point." She sat down to make that note to herself. Non-wanded self defense strategies. It might come in handy to know.
When Hermione had defense later on she had her paper in outline format. The teacher glared at her so she stared back then went back to her notes, seeing unconcerned.
"What are you doing?" Umbridge demanded, stomping to her seat.
"I heard about the paper earlier from another person so I'm making a list of all the things I could include. It's what reasonable people do before they write a paper. We take notes, make a plan, make an outline, then write it." She stared at her primly. "Didn't you when you were in school?"
"No," she sneered.
"Hmm. By the NEWT records book found in the library you only took three." She smiled at her. "I hope I do better." She stomped off in a huff.
"We have a record of NEWT results?" Ron asked.
"Not the actual scores but how many you took. They're filed by graduation year," Hermione said. "They update if you take a few later on after having a class we don't have here, like the law specialty classes two other schools have in theirs." She smiled at him. "Or the healer classes other schools have that we don't. They have a whole list of classes for future healers for the last two years of coursework." She shrugged a bit. "We don't have much vocational tracking here."
Umbridge glared at her. "They do not."
"Hopkiss does. I've looked at theirs after my first year here." She smirked a bit. "As do Lancaster and Eppling. Eppling had a great many vocational classes that we don't here and their NEWT passing rate is at eighty-three percent where as Hogwarts is at fifty-two percent of passing all the ones you took." She got back to her notes. Of course Umbridge would try to change the paper topic now but oh well. She'd fuss at the other class but they had ways of showing what she had done.
Umbridge was glaring again. "Those schools are not any good, Granger, and they don't accept people like *you* who break rules."
"I haven't broken a rule yet this year," she said dryly. "And you can't prove I have." She stared at her. "Unlike ones who are breaking current ministry law by what she did last night." She produced the rule book and looked it up. "Oh, yes, here, Law 93, subsection 82, part c." She stared at her. Then she held up the book. "Would you like to look at it so you know what you broke?
"You'd think an under minister would know all the laws but there's so many it's easy to forget one or two I'm sure." Umbridge glared at her. She closed the book and put it into her bag then smiled at her, looking angelic. "So what are we going over today, as you've cost us ten minutes of class time?"
"I will see you expelled."
"You go right ahead. I can pass some NEWTs today." She smiled at her. "Which is all I need to do to prove graduation." The teacher humphed and got to the lessons of pointlessness.
Ron raised his hand. "Professor, last class you said that wasn't a rule and was actually a fairytale." He stared at her. "Have you found evidence we can do that after all?"
"Shut up, Weasley."
"I'm trying to clarify. We do have OWLs this year. I'd like to pass so I have a future job. And to keep my mother from tearing down the building to get to the teacher that didn't teach me things."
"Your mother would love to talk to her about that I'm sure," Draco said dryly from his seat. "So would mine. Though yours would be more loud."
Ron looked at him. "Probably true. I doubt your mother can yell the same way." He looked at her again. "So is it a fairytale or not?"
"It is!" She pointed. "Get out of my class for being disruptive, Weasley."
"Sure, I'll go tell on myself." He gathered his stuff and headed up to the headmaster's office, who already knew since he smirked as he walked in. "Mum would love to talk to her about the education I'm expected to have."
"She would expect you to study on your own, Mr. Weasley."
"Hermione has made me."
"Good point." He let Ron write a note and send it through the floo. He chuckled at the 'asked the teacher a question about something she said that contradicted her last class and got kicked out, sorry, Mum'. He sent it over then walked off to get some sunlight in.
Dumbledore decided he wanted to be close enough to hear that discussion but not in the same room. With how loud Molly was he could sit outside and hear it.
And he proved himself right later on when Molly called instead of showing up to talk to Ron, who defended himself and showed her his notes, then Hermione's notes. That made Molly a bit peeved.
***
Sam heard the yelling and winced. "Ooh, that sounds like my mother but with fewer bad words."
Bucky nodded. "Mine too. Should've heard her yelling at me and Stevie." He shuddered at the new yelling bout.
"Mine was thankfully a quiet source of rage," Helmut said. He winced, feeling embarrassed for that kid. "Which mother do you think that is?"
"Well, she keeps mentioning Ron," Sam quipped. "So I'm thinking it's Weasley. No one in the school has the same name. Which is a bit weird with how many Sams I went to school with."
Bucky nodded. "Have you noticed that the Harry kid is really looking like he's going to snap?"
Sam considered it. "I only saw him in passing earlier. I heard that Umbridge thinks he lied about something. Which is why she got sent."
"I haven't seen him but I've recognized the same look we all carry now and then on Miss Granger and Mr. Weasley both," Helmut said.
Alexei sat on the couch with a sigh. "They both look like they've seen the start of a battle but perhaps not the end. Though Granger doesn't strike me as one who would normally do that. She's very into her books."
"So am I," Helmut said. "But sometimes you have to do the work to protect what's yours." He sighed at the new screaming going on. "May we just go ...solve that for the children?" he asked, looking that way.
"That's be wrong," Sam said. "We're at a truce right now so we all get home. It's not a good idea to rock the boat. Though, there's a theory there that I could get behind if I catch her abusing a kid again." He smirked a bit.
"I would have no problem with her," Alexei said dryly, smirking at him.
"Me either," Helmut agreed. "Or with handling someone going rogue. It may even be a slight pleasure."
Bucky glared at him. "Down, puppy. Quit being a bitch."
Helmut smirked at him. "Me? A bitch? Are you certain that's the proper term?"
"Flirty European bitch," Sam agreed with a nod. "You do it so well too. You were born to be one." Helmut still looked amused. Finally the screaming stopped. "Is going down for dinner a good idea?"
"Please," Alexei said. He stood up and straightened out his clothes. "I could definitely eat. I did not have lunch, the unicorn had me trapped while staring at me."
"We have a unicorn here?" Helmut demanded, looking confused.
"Yes, the students study it, and probably pet it a lot for the girls."
"Huh. That's nice. Do we think they have dragons as well?"
"Probably," Bucky said. "It's in their creature books, the one that you have to pet to get it to open and not bite you." He grabbed his overshirt and put it on as they left together. They didn't trust each other, but they could stay at a truce. Until they got home. Then it might be on again. They ran into Ron and Harry talking quietly in the hallway, walking around the boys. They all nodded at them. "Dinner, boys," Bucky ordered. "You don't need to skip meals or you'll end up not growing enough."
"Coming," Ron agreed. He looked at Harry, who shrugged but followed him. Hermione wasn't in there but she came in a few minutes later with a new book to read. "What's that one on?" he asked dryly.
She smiled at him. "Swords and their various styles. You can't behead things with a fencing foil but there's about thirty styles of swords." She sat down to go over it for her paper while she ate.
Helmut took the book from her, closing it gently, staring at her. "If you skip meals, you don't have the energy to grow later on or do anything else," he said patiently, staring at her. "I would not have allowed my former son or former wife to treat themselves that poorly."
She swallowed her current bite of food. "I can do both but thank you for caring. Your family sounded like they were lucky to have you in their lives."
"I was lucky to have them and they did help me greatly. But do eat. Just in case you have to defend yourself later."
She nodded. "I should, yes. Thank you for reminding me, Baron." She dug in, one hand on the book when it tried to wiggle. It went into her lap so she could eat.
Harry looked at her. "Swords?" he asked her.
"She wanted a paper on how to handle defense things when you use the theories in the book on not using defensive spells." She shrugged. "I can't punch a creature and make it leave people alone. I may have to behead them however." She smiled. "Or kick them perhaps. Something like that."
"Oh." He nodded. "That can work I guess." He dug in again, almost sighing at the food. "This is...." Hermione handed down a plate so he got some meat to go with his potatoes. "Thanks."
"Welcome." She watched him eat before going back to her own dinner.
Ron heard stomping and looked then got up to look up the hallway. "Protego," he cast at the doorway. "Hagrid, the hippogryff is in the hallway." He sat down again.
Dumbledore sighed. "Who let it out this time?" he asked the school.
"Someone broke the fence," Hagrid told him. "I spent all last class with 'em helpin' me to repair it." He went to corral his hippogryff. Again. A few of the kids that the thing liked went with him. The thing really loved one of the second years who gave him good ear scratches.
Ron looked over as the sound of screaming, crying, and someone starting to pound on the door, taking down the shield. She nearly fell in and ran to the headmaster. "What's happened?" Ron called. "Do we need to protect the hall again?"
"That rogue dementor is back," Dumbledore said. "Stay in here please while I go drive it off." He got up to go do that. "Go sit down," he told the student. She nodded, going to do that. He went to drive the stupid thing off. His patronus was very strong. And the thing ignored he was there. It was clearly targeted. "Hagrid," he called. "Keep them there!"
"I am," he called back. "They're in the barn." He was staring at that thing.
Harry came out by way of Umbridge pulling him. "There, you're the sort to do that sort of thing," she sneered.
He stared at her. "Threatening my life is childish and against the law." He did cast a patronus. "Expecto Patronum!" It came out but the dementor ignored him. "Huh. What is that thing?"
Draco and the other fifth years came out with Snape following them to make sure they went. It focused on them and that girl shrank back. "Pansy, get her inside." They got that student inside and he stared at it. "It figured her horrible cunt of a mother sicced you on her."
Harry looked at his wand then shrugged and cast his patronus again. This time it took notice because Prongs tried to stab it. It fled again. Harry looked at Draco. "Can we tie whoever sent that up and beat them?"
"It'd make a good all-house project," Draco said as he went back inside. He was shaky, but he had chocolate waiting. He knew it wasn't targeted on him. The stupid creatures were scared of his mother, they'd never come near him. That one...she needed some help.
"Mr. Malfoy, do talk to me later about her mother," Dumbledore called after him. "Or your head of house," he said at the amused sounding snort. "That way something can hopefully be done."
Harry pulled back in his patronus, looking at the headmaster. "Bats and a pinata party?"
"I doubt she'd drop much candy," he said, walking him inside so Harry preceded him.
Umbridge glared at his back. "Mr. Potter has detention tonight," she said in a snotty voice.
"No he does not," Dumbledore said. "He has a medical examination tonight." He looked at the boy, who grinned at that reprieve.
"If he misses tonight I have the right to give him five instead for each missed hour."
"That is not in the school rules," Dumbledore said, staring at her. "At all."
"I can have it made the rules."
"While the Ministry may make *some* rules it does not make student conduct rules. That is the school board's job. Cornelius is not on the school board." He walked off again. "Should you attempt that you can go tell him you failed miserably." She spluttered. He walked back into the great hall, staring at Snape, who nodded he had heard. "Would you have a way to handle that?"
"Yes, I do." He smirked a bit. " With pleasure, Headmaster."
"Thank you, Severus. Poppy, I know you have Mr. Potter tonight for an examination."
"Yes, I do," she said, then stuffed her mouth.
"Though I believe I had Potter in detention tonight originally." Umbridge glared at him. He stared back. "I did. I called him first. You can wait." She glared but dug in, eating angrily so she could call Cornelius to get him to fix this problem with a decree.
***
Alexei looked at the Potter boy the next day, after lunch. "You appear pale and have clearly lost five pounds since breakfast," he said. "Are you ill? We can take you to the nurse."
"I'm...I'll be fine. Thank you."
"Hmm. Is that why your arm is bloody?"
"Yes. It is." He walked past him. "Thank you but she shouldn't get you too."
"I have seen worse than her," he said. "Many worse than her." He walked off, going to see if he could get Umbridge to knock her out at least. He did manage a nerve jab to her throat as he walked behind her. She was trying to interrogate Sam. "Aw, she fainted. It must be at my magnificence." He walked over her and walked past Sam with a smirk.
Sam nodded. "Probably." He waited until he was out of sight. "Um, Professor?" he called. One came to their door. "She just collapsed." He pointed down. "I don't want someone to have to walk over her."
"Or on her?" she asked with a smile. "I'll floo Poppy." She went to do that, getting the nurse to come down to move her.
Sam walked off looking more happy. He ran into Harry and stared at the kid. "You're pale," he said quietly. "You good?"
"I'll be fine. I've had worse."
Sam leaned down to get closer to his face. "I work with veterans who're coming out of war zones when I'm not in uniform." He smirked a bit. "I've heard that a number of times. Would you like to talk?"
"You're not even from here."
"Which means you can be honest because I can't affect much. But I can give advice."
He blinked a few times. "Maybe. Thank you, Mr. Wilson."
"Welcome, Harry. Let me know." He patted him on the shoulder, seeing the wince he hid. "Want the nurse?"
"She can't do anything." He sighed. "It's from a magical artifact."
Sam looked at his arm then at him. "Healing spells don't work?" He shook his head. "Then they should be broken."
"She'd try to kill me for that and there's more than one."
"Then break the shit. That's not a good thing for anyone to do." He patted him on the cheek. "Come talk to me later if you want to, Harry." He walked into the great hall. He looked at Bucky. "I'm going to put off our talk tonight unless you need it a lot," he said quietly.
"I'm good, steady," he admitted. He nodded at Harry as he walked around them. "I'm fine, Sam. Really I am."
"Good." He sat down, nodding at the kids. "How're we today?"
"Pretty decent," Neville admitted, glancing at Harry then at him. "About normal."
Sam grinned. "Is that because you skipped earlier?"
"No, I didn't get to. I had to go to class. Which was boring." He grimaced. "But I almost napped. It was nice. No one was snoring."
"Oy!" Ron complained.
"I did not mention names, Ron. Just the snoring."
Harry snickered, smirking at him. "It can be loud, yeah." He looked at Ron. "And it's not just you." Neville nodded at that. "Can't we block that on the beds?"
Hermione sat down, putting her bag down at her feet. "No. I asked my first year and they said it's a safety precaution in case someone gets attacked in their bed, so they could scream and we'd hear them."
"Girls snore?" Neville asked.
"Yes, just as often as men do." She nodded. "And I probably do sometimes as well when my nose is stuffed up."
Lavender looked up at her and nodded. "Yes, you do. Often. But it's at least quiet. Unlike the senior year girl who snores so loudly you hear her up the hallway."
"I'll have my sinuses checked when I'm home for the summer. I didn't know it was chronic. Sorry."
Lavender shrugged. "We all do sometimes. It's not every night but it's fairly often. At least a few times a month."
"I'll have my mother make me an appointment to have that checked. Thank you for letting me know." She smiled at her then at Ron. Who was rolling his eyes. "Eat, Ron."
"I am. Quit nagging, Hermione."
She stared at him. "Are you sick? You've usually inhaled half a plate by now." Harry and Neville both laughed at that.
"I'm fine. I'm trying to be more polite."
She nodded. "Thank you for that." She got her own food and dug in then had to look down and move her bag away from the thing at her feet. "Someone's familiar is loose," she said quietly. "And it's...probably not a great thing. Harry?"
He looked and hissed something at it, making it scurry off. "I have no idea how it would've gotten in here. We aren't allowed to have those as pets. Though there's plenty of pets that aren't on the owls, toads, and cats list around here."
Bucky looked then at him. "It's a Mexican lizard and it's poisonous," he said. "I have no idea how it traveled but some people do keep them as pets." The thing was hissing at some girl so he got up to go grab it. "You, behave," he told it, staring at it. It hissed at him too. "No, don't hiss at me." He looked at the headmaster, who looked confused. He came up to hand it over. "It's a lizard from Mexico and it's poisonous."
"Oh, dear. How did it get in the school?" He took it to check over then gave it to Hagrid.
"It's a tiny little biter," he cooed at it.
Bucky sat down again. "How did you talk to it, Harry?"
"I can talk to snakes."
"Oh. That's a neat gift."
"A lot of people think it's dark but it's not," Ron told him.
"A lot of people think a lot of things are dark when they're not," Sam said. "A lot of that is a social definition not a reality."
"I can understand that."
Helmut looked at him then at Sam, then back at him. "Often things that are dark can also have a good idea behind them but someone got lost along the way or decided on expedience. Revolutions are a prime example of that."
Harry looked at him. "I learned a bit about the French one in muggle school."
"Yes, and they got many who weren't involved and who weren't of importance to their cause. Because they could. It wasn't right but it was a good reason to have a revolution."
"I can understand that. We've seen some of that before in the last war we had. Including people being thrown in jail without a trial."
Helmut nodded. "As has happened whenever someone without any sense of justice gets in power. Some have more than others and prove it, but anyone can be an asshole that way." Harry grinned at that bit of swearing.
"But sometimes it's not," Hermione said quietly, staring at them. "Because they involve innocents. Especially women."
"Many have, but not all," Helmut assured her, staring at her. That was a depth he hadn't expected of her, but he probably should. She was much like he had been at her age.
"I know it's not all of them. But it does happen in every single war." She grimaced. "And most of the time nothing gets done to the ones who do it."
"No, some of us solve that in our units," he assured her. "By blowing their brains out. I did not allow that at all in my unit."
She nodded. "Then you're really rare, Baron. Really, really rare." She grimaced. "Which says bad things about humanity."
"There's ways of fixing that."
She nodded. "I'm feeling like I should. I don't like politics and going to muggle politics would be difficult after being here for years as we don't have traceable education records." She ate a bite.
Bucky looked at her. "A lot of soldiers didn't do that stuff, Hermione."
She nodded. "And yet in today's London Times, they found a whole unit had. An absolutely whole unit." He winced. "And they were just broken up apparently. Not charged." She ate a bite and chewed. "What happens when you end up considering that maybe humanity should fall?"
Sam looked at her. "You step back, you find the ones who aren't like that. You may start a social movement to get them charged, or join one if there's already one. You don't just sit there and mourn about it, kiddo."
"I need to do that. It's absolutely wrong and needs to be stopped before more are harmed."
"You're a girl," Ron said.
Hermione stared at him. "Yes, and those who abuse women as victims of wartime crimes wouldn't care, Ron. They'd think it was fun." He winced, flinching down away from her. "I really do not think some people should represent their people and that whole unit that got noted is one of them. They certainly don't represent England and its grace."
"No, I guess. What did they do?"
She stared at him then sighed, looking at Ginny. "I'll explain it to him later," Ginny agreed. "Ron, remember Ramata, up the road from us?" He nodded slowly. "You heard what happened to her daughter?" He winced but nodded. "That. Whatever unit of the military did that to a whole lot of women."
"Oh. Then yeah, they need to be stopped. But you can't do that from here."
She considered it. "If there's a protest I may be able to get permission to go."
"How would you get there?" Ron asked.
"There's floos in London, Ron."
"Oh. That. Yeah I guess." He sighed. "I have no idea about any of that stuff."
"Which makes you very lucky," Hermione said. "As I went to school with some refugees." Helmut winced at that. "Yes, quite. It's a worry."
"As it should be for most women wherever wars might break out. Many don't start on mainland England." She gave him a pointed look and he knew, he realized. Harry gave her a pointed look back so she went back to eating.
Zemo and Sam shared a look because they had both caught that clue. Could they help? Perhaps. Zemo got a history book from the library to look over to see what had happened and what the children were worried about starting again. He shared it with the others when he found it.
That was not a job for children.
***
Albus Dumbledore looked at the Scottish ministry official in his office. "Why did you show up today?" he asked pleasantly.
"We have gotten some complaints about your school, Headmaster. I know you are usually under England's ministry's rules but we do have some we must follow as well." He stared at him. "The children seemed most distressed. Walking up here from the apparation barrier in town was very illuminating." He handed over the few reports. "I have copied the pertinent parts of each of the twenty-eight reports of misconduct by a few of your teachers."
He sighed, looking them over. "Well, yes. She's actually been installed by the English ministry to uphold their ideas in education. Though she is not a decent teacher. She doesn't have the skills to teach really." He went back to reading. A few about Snape and his problems with Gryffindor from a Hufflepuff. It had stated that it was a Hufflepuff. One against Filch for taking their things against the law and threatening torture on them. "I don't believe Mr. Filch would ever truly torture a student."
The Ministry official stared at him. "We're not that certain. You may have known him as an employee for years but if that ministry non-teacher has a fit and says he can, would he? We asked some sources about what was going on," he said smugly. "Knew about her."
"I...honestly do not know," he admitted. A paper was slid across the desk, making him stare at it. "I had not heard that news."
The ministry official nodded. "I figured you hadn't. We don't particularly want a pissing match with the other ministry but if we must step in, we will step in to protect the children. It is in our job as well and you do have to live up to our standards as well as theirs as you're located up here." He stared at him. "So, we should evaluate the situation, shouldn't we?"
"You can do so but I can guarantee Cornelius Fudge will not be receptive."
"Well, we've known he was an imbecile for years now. He insulted himself and all of you during his first diplomatic visit." He looked at the door then at the headmaster, who nodded it was probably the one they were speaking of. "Do come in," he called. She huffed as she walked in, smiling at him. "Oh, he sent you." He stared at her. "As this school is in Scotland proper, it is under our rules, not just yours. And we will be upholding standards we have set for all our schools here, Madam Umbridge."
"Minister Fudge has said Hogwarts is ours."
"Yet you're in Scotland." He stood up, staring at her. "Unless you wish to pick this school up completely and move it back to England, you will abide by Scottish ministry rules as well. Or we will shut this school down." He smirked a bit. "With the multiple complaints we got this year, not just the usual five or six we get about teachers being arses to the students and Filch threatening them with torture, we feel it is best to step in now. Before things slide too far down the shitter."
"I don't believe we will," she said. "There's been no complaints given to me."
"Twenty-one of the twenty-eight complaints we received as of yesterday are about you." She scowled. He stared back. "Including how you are not able to teach, not qualified to teach, have no teaching certificate, have no idea about children as you do not have any of your own, and there's been multiple reports of you torturing students.
"Which we do not like. We do like to protect children in Scotland. I thought they did in England but apparently we've been proven wrong." He took the papers Dumbledore held up to show her. "We should speak on your complaints."
"I will not have this and neither will Minster Fudge," she said. "Let me call him."
"Our minister's meeting with him today. It's a courtesy to remind him that Scotland is not part of England. We're part of the Commonwealth but not part of England. You actually have no say in this school as you're in Scotland. We pretend you do but really, we can push that you do not have a single say in this school."
"They're English students!"
"Not all of them. There's Irish students here as well. Hogwarts does seem to discriminate against Scots and Northern Irish magical students for some reason. Which we don't like. We like to be fair to all students who need an education."
"Minister Fudge has not noted that."
"Well, we have." He waved a hand at the floo. "But do call. I'm sure he'll be pleased with the break." She walked over to do that. He looked at Dumbledore. "Do you have our law books up here?" he asked.
"Yes." He looked and pointed. "It's a few years out of date though. It's the law book but not the rules for educational institutions."
"We can make sure you get some tonight, Headmaster Dumbledore." He looked smug again. "There's got to be rules to be followed. We even try to make them reasonable because we know what shits kids can be."
Dumbledore nodded. "Many times." The man smiled and nodded. Fudge was spluttering over the floo. "He is correct, we are physically placed in Scotland and they are their own country with their own government being restarted," he said over the choking on his own hubris.
"The two ministries were separated again in 1808, and the Irish ministry being the oldest in the UK and Great Britain agreed to uphold that separation between the three countries' ministries. As they have needs that we don't that the English ministry has never put up with they have always kept their own ministry even when it was a subset of our own.
"We are physically in Scotland and we do have to follow their rules as well. It is only right as they're hosting the school." He looked up. "Speaking of hosting, we have four probable muggles here who switched realms somehow and ended up in our forest. They've promised not to harm a student, are all former military, and have been very kind to the students who were looking for some adult guidance from outside a teacher."
"I heard. They seem like decent enough sorts?"
"They're all former soldiers and one's actually a comic book sort as he has a uniform and a shield to do his duty as Captain America."
"Interesting. Hadn't heard of that."
"They're farther from our reality. They only have one of their four in common, but he's been regendered here and moved countries."
The Scottish official nodded. "That would mean they're many realities away from their own. How is getting them back going?"
"The last I knew they were searching for a group of sorcerers who come out of Tibet. Some Sorcerer Supreme apparently."
"They're in New York."
Dumbledore nodded. "We can probably write to them if our Mysteries department didn't manage it. They probably would like to go home."
"Probably. Are they decent?"
"Yes, very polite. All former soldiers. Two American, one Russian, and one from a country called Sokovia that doesn't exist here. Apparently it was absorbed when all the unification was going on."
"That makes sense." He nodded. "It's good they're not harmful." He looked at the floo again, waving at his boss. "Minister, I've handed over the complaints, he needs a copy of our educational rules. His law book is the red one instead of the purple we have right now."
"I can have that sent to him," he agreed with a nod. He looked at the headmaster. "Who were all those complaints about?" He pointed at her back. "Oh, your assistant, Minister Fudge. That figures that she doesn't have any teaching credentials. She really must have some to teach in a school of any kind. We do demand them."
"I have a few who are lapsed in theirs," Dumbledore said. "But they have been teaching for years and Hagrid, who is not officially a teacher per se but the Groundskeeper and he fills in since I cannot seem to find a magical creatures professor."
The Scottish minister nodded. "I'm sure the kids like him?"
"Quite a lot," he agreed happily. "He likes to pet and baby creatures, especially the more dangerous ones. The children do like that though."
"That's not a bad thing and we'll see if we can get him certified to teach."
"Thank you. That would be kind of you."
"Not a problem. The other teacher that got complained about? Snap was it?"
"Snape. He does show favoritism of the students but he does also rein it in fairly strictly. He could be much worse and was when he first started to teach."
"We'll see." He stared at him then at Fudge. "Should I be expecting you'll be moving the school this summer?"
"No! That's impossible!"
"Then you must live by the rules of the place where your school is at. It's a kindness we offer to you to let you have any say in that school as she's ours. She sits in Scotland, she's an old Scottish lass, she's ours." He stared at him. "I do not care one way or another but we can rescind the ability to send up your own rules at all. It wouldn't bother us much. They probably live up to at least ninety percent of our rules." He smirked at him. "So what'll it be, Fudgey?"
"I'm sure we can work this out," he ground out.
"I'm sure we won't have to because the problems will be stopping. Today. Or we will close that school that you claim so hard until it's fixed and within our laws."
Fudge nodded. "I can see that point. We do try to follow good rules. We're upping the education."
"Not by what the students have said. Not by the practice tests we gave to a few students either. A few of the NEWT students who're interning with us." He smirked. "They nearly failed it completely. Their education wasn't up to our levels, which are apparently harder than yours. So therefore it will be fixed. Today. We'll look at his teaching staff and all that to see where the inadequacies are. See where things are knotted when they shouldn't be."
"I'm sure we can work that out," Fudge said. "It may take us a few days."
"Good. Then remove your assistant from the school. Now. As twenty-one of the reports were on her conduct with the students. The only thing she wasn't accused of was sleeping with one."
"She would never!"
"I don't rightly care. I care that she's apparently tortured students."
"She has not!"
"We'll be looking at the students who were reported to have been tortured. If we find one, she's going to jail. Our laws do forbid such things on children. As she's on our soil, she'd be liable under our laws."
"I never heard such things," Fudge complained.
"Yes you have. You used it yourself to get that Indian ambassador a few years back," the one in the office with Dumbledore said. "And before you try to have an auror obliviate us, do know that we had a grand meeting last night of all department heads about all the complaints." He looked at Dumbledore then back at Umbridge when she turned around holding her wand.
"That's fine if you wanna do that." She started to curse him so he snatched the wand and threw it in the fire. "We can handle that now can't we." He smirked, getting his people in to arrest her, in front of her minister for magic. They could make sure they did it correctly and gave her courtesy. Their prison didn't have dementors to torment her. Though he saw one out the window. "Who let a dementor up here?" he demanded, glaring at Dumbledore.
"We think it's targeted on a student by their parent. The other night we tested to see which student it was, done by the students themselves, and then we ran it off for the second time. I alerted that we have one hanging about in our forest up here but no one's come to get it."
He stood up to look. "That's heading for the greenhouse and her other daughter's out there." He cleared his throat. "Mopsy, go warn Madam Sprout that dementor is back and by her classes." The house elf appeared nodding and went to tell her that. "We have tried to get it to go away. If that's the same one since there's two. Fawkes, can you go help?"
The phoenix flew outside to go fight the stupid thing. It ran from her but the second one didn't. Thankfully they were older students, NEWT level students, who could cast a good patronus. It was NEWT time for Magical Creatures too thankfully. "I want them gone today, Minister Fudge. And I do mean immediately. They are a threat to the town and our school full of children."
"I'm sure we will be," Fudge sneered.
Dumbledore wrote out a note. "Trashy!" That house elf appeared. "To Amelia Bones, head auror. I don't care what she's doing. She must get that immediately." The house elf took it and popped off.
In London, in the hearing chamber during a trial, Amelia Bones saw the house elf flash in. "Not right now."
"Headmaster said must have now." He handed it to her then disappeared.
She glanced at it, then growled. "Excuse my absence," she announced, standing up. "Hirschfeld, take over. There's two dementors up at Hogwarts." She stomped off, gathering a few aurors, her battle vest, and went up there to go handle that. The phoenix was doing an okay job. The patronus was working. Theirs were stronger because they were older and stronger.
One tried to flee and got trapped. The other seemed to ignore it all. "It's targeted." They surrounded it with patronuses and got the trapping device in there to suck it down. Then the aurors sighed at that. "Get me a report on who it was targeted to." She nodded at the Scottish aurors coming out of the school with a bound person, realizing who it was by the nauseating pink suit she wore. "What's she done this time?" she asked with a smile.
"Twenty-one complaints about her torturing students." He nodded. "We've got it."
"Please do. If you need us to take her back, let me know personally. We have a good jail for her if she did torture a student."
"I can do that, Bonesy." He grinned at her. "Got the nasties?"
"Yes we do. I need to know who that one was targeted on."
One of the kids in Magical Creatures looked over, pushing his hair back with his wand hand. "Someone in fifth year Slytherin. Last night all the fifth years came out to see who it was, at the suggestion of Snape sending his and the other kiddies agreed, and found out. They drove it off then too."
"We can have them locked up. Any idea which student?" He shook his head. "We'll get a report and find out why."
"Please do. Those things are creepy and we've seen enough of them from a few years ago. When we had between eight and twenty around here looking for Sirius Black." He went back to classes, getting a sip of water from the pump for the troughs.
"Not my doing," Bones told the Scottish aurors.
"We know." They grinned as they walked Umbridge off complaining and wailing that Cornelius would save her. "If he does, he can have the cell next to yours," the auror told her. "So shut up." She whined at that. They took her to book her into jail and formally question her about her teaching activities.
Another auror went up to talk to the various houses of kids to see who had gotten hurt. Most weren't, more than a bit. One...he was hurt. Pretty scarred. The kids all tried to let him hide behind them when he sat down with the Gryffs but he was an auror and a father. "Kiddies, let me see so we can charge her and she can't come back." He stared at a few. "Please. That way I make sure she don't do it again."
Harry sighed, walking around them. "They're trying to protect me."
"Of course they are. Which one're you?" he asked with a slight smile to appear non-threatening.
"Harry Potter."
"Oh, okay." He nodded. "Let's see then. Do we need privacy?"
"They've all seen my arms bleeding." He let him see his wrist.
The auror gently moved the shirt up to follow the scars, then looked at him. "How?"
"She had me doing lines," he said quietly. "They're saying I lied when I didn't."
"All right then. She's gettin' it for that." He checked his other arm then took him to a nearby side room. "Shirt off, kiddo. Let me see how many. I won't make it pictures but I gotta know." Harry sighed but did that. He winced. "The other scars?"
"Not hers." He looked at him.
The guy leaned down closer to him. "Your family? The ones you stay with?"
Harry sighed. "I... there's supposed to be blood wards. For protection. And I have to go back there."
"Best ward there is is not bein' where they think you are," he said dryly. Then he grinned. "Works the best ever and makes guys like me hunt people down. They do it all the time to get away from my sort. Did you write one of the complaints?"
"No. Because I honestly don't think it'll do any good and she'll be back here in a few days."
"Then she'll be under a compulsion to not do it again." He patted him on the cheek. "We'll figure it out, Harry." He helped him back into his shirt. "Get Pompfrey to get rid of the scars later on this year. Once she's had her trial."
"They can do that?"
"Yeah, we've been able to do that since the dark ages."
"Why didn't she tell me that?"
"Don't know. Want me to ask her for you?"
"I... I don't want to make trouble."
"It's no trouble, Harry. You're a kid, you should be a kid for years yet. Not look like a war veteran. That's my job, not yours." He patted him on the cheek again, letting him go while he made notes on the way up to the infirmary. He smiled at the nurse, who winced. "Please do not remove his scars until after her trial. That way if we need proof it's there." He gave her a pointed look before leaving to tell his boss in the office. "Sir."
He looked at him. "Dodkins. Good news?"
"Bonesy got the dementors. Found out the targeted one, she's a fifth year Slytherin. They think her mom did it and she's Irish so I'm telling them in a few. Found a few of the tortured kids and it's real nasty. Pomfrey knows not to remove scars until after the trial. Asked her myself." He stared at him then at Dumbledore then at his boss again. "Kid's really scarred. She's got some sort of blood quill or something like it. He said he was forced to write lines."
"We'd like to confiscate those." He smiled at Dumbledore.
"They're grandfathered in up here as well."
"Not if she's a criminal they're not." He smirked. "Go search her shit. I wanna see what else she's got. Don't touch anything classified as she's an under minister."
"Got it." He went to find that with McGonagall leading him to her suite to search it. He found the blood quills, still with blood on them. He found a few other things he confiscated and did look at the stuff on her desk, which was a draft of an edict to punish the students. So he took that too. It wasn't finished or signed so it wasn't classified yet. McGonagall looked at him as he came out. He let her see that edict and she swore. "Good enough to know it wasn't you guys."
"The students are a pain but not that much," she assured him.
"Good. Watch for memory charms." He gave her a pointed look and held up the bag with quills. Then he left to hand them to his boss, who was not amused at any of that. He went back to the office with the evidence to log it in. She might be pretty well screwed unless Fudge tried to pressure them then it'd go court to court.
***
In Gryffindor, Harry looked around. "Thank you for writing the complaints." He looked at Hermione.
"No, I have one drafted but not sent. I did send one to my mother about her but not about you, Harry. Otherwise my mother would've been up here in her face and probably punched her."
He grinned at that. "Thanks,'Mione. Guys?" He stared at them. "Thank you." They all shrugged but left them to study or talk or whatever. He sat down with a sigh of relief. At least it was over, there weren't formal pictures. They'd handle the rest later. He hoped.
***
Story notes:
Yes, it's the birthday story. I've been looking forward to post this for you guys.