Twiny Chaos In Action.
Alex was out for more medical and food supplies. It was a week after the battle in St. Louis. They were both finishing their healing. Fortunately St. Louis was still standing after that battle. Thankfully they had brought the larger weapons and Clay's team had been there to back them up when the agents tried to get frisky with the younger slayers. The rescue hadn't been fun but it had been reasonable. The agents' boss had told them that and then glared at Clay for a while until Clay explained what the guy's malfunction was to him. So now they were all in semi-hiding and handling things.
Thankfully Chicago's two problems were being quiet. The princess had found a nice house and had made a truce with the mayor to stay quietly and peacefully in town. The other one had pouted at them about thinking she'd be mean and took a single person off with her to coo over. It had been an agent but he had volunteered by stepping up to talk to her about her plans instead of calling the Council or even the local police. The last they had heard, the young one was deliriously happy with her newest head minion.
Alex got to the pharmacy and then the grocery store safely. It was at the house where things ran into problems. He parked and sighed when he saw the news van. "Great," he muttered. "Just ...great." He sent in a text message to his twin. Xander wasn't walking real well with the stitches to his leg but maybe he could be backup this time. Or send out the ladies to screw up their minds. He got out of the car with the two bags, turning on his security alarm once the car was locked. He nodded at the people rushing toward him on his way to the gate. "I have no problem with hurting people who trespass," he warned. He made it into his gate.
"When did you join the Council?" the reporter called, looking very young and earnest. It must nearly be her first story.
Alex looked at her. "When my twin and I started to back Buffy up in Sunnydale."
"We've never seen you at any battles," she huffed.
He smirked. "That you know of. I've been at the last two here in the US, lady. Before then I was training the others and you guys didn't know much about Sunnydale."
"There's no way to verify that," she complained.
He smirked evilly at her. He was the evil twin after all. "Go ask Senior Agent Gloria Henris. She took over for SSA Henders, who we used to work with until they retired him to a different project. They're in Homeland and we've worked with them before. She's new so she's been in our files from what we've heard." He went inside. That'd prove the nosy, cranky bitch right for trying to arrest them for saving a city. "Beloved twin, I'm back with the cookies."
"Too true," Alex quipped with a grin. "I gave the poor pouty one a recommendation for who to talk to." They took the bags into the kitchen, doing the bandage change in there then settling in to eat cookies while looking up lesser explosives. Pooch had told them where to look for them.
Buffy groaned when an agent stomped her way in the food court at the mall. "Am I really in trouble for taking a few of the girls shopping?" she demanded.
He leaned down to get into her face. "The lady over the unit your twins work with in Homeland was not amused they sent a reporter at her," he said quietly. She grinned. "She got into their real files. For the last six days she's shared them illegally."
"Is there an oops in them?"
"No. She found what Congress had classified and let it spill. It's now an international incident, Miss Summers."
"If the twins didn't tell the nosy ones then we're not in trouble."
"Like hell they're not. The White House had to admit that they had happened and everyone was covering them up to keep panicking and problems down. Is there any agent that the twins do well with?"
"They have a liaison guy that helped them get out of Africa. I'm not sure why they needed it, Giles wouldn't tell me."
"We found stuff they didn't tell Congress."
She shrugged. "Maybe they didn't ask? The twins don't tell us anything that we don't ask about because then we'd nag their normal guy butts about what they did. Like we did after the military hotties brought them along on that rescue." She smiled. "The military hotties were sweet though."
"All but one's single. Pooch is married with a kid on the way." She grinned at that news. "Colonel Clay dates like the twins if it matters." He straightened up, staring down at her. "There's a huge call to talk to your boss, you, and the twins about things."
"The twins would probably hide like a mofo from you guys. They do from us."
"I'm sure they'd try. Do you have any idea where they are?"
"Um, Chicago as far as anyone knows. Or did they get kidnaped by another evil girl sort?" She sipped her drink.
"That's possible," he sighed. "Fair warning that you need to find something *tasteful* and *mature* to wear when Congress wants to talk, Miss Summers." He stomped off calling that news in.
Buffy called Giles to tell him. "There's agents with their panties in a twist, Giles. Something about the twins." She listened to him explain it. "That's not our fault, that's her fault for spilling classified information. The twins were good boys. Though I don't want to know why a battle was classified that way." She finished her drink and put the cup on the tray. "Sure. I got warned to find something mature and you-ish to talk to the Congress people again." She hung up and went to do her own shopping. She had no idea how to dress like Giles as a girl but she was sure someone would in some of the stores they had around here.
Alex hung up, shaking his head. "Disconnected."
"I'm guessing he changes his number every once in a while to make it more interesting to find him," Xander sighed. He rubbed his new bruise on his side. "Barrings?"
"He told us to lay low."
"It's not our fault our latest date was so cranked." They shared a look. "That agent lady who was so hot?"
"Yeah, we can do that." He looked her up online. Jensen had gotten them a government agent directory. He called her. "Agent Keen? You met me with Mr. Reddington. I'm Alex Harris. Yes, him," he said with a smile. "We've been looking for Red for a while. We just saved one of his minions for him and stopped an ex who was going to send you a biological weapon. We can't find him to warn him about that or to let him have his minion back. Do you have any idea of how to get in touch with him?" He smiled. "I don't want to make him mad and I don't want to see his minion arrested, ma'am. No, not that one. We know Dembe. We got drunk with him one night after a battle."
Xander took the phone. "We're not willing to hand the minion over to anyone, Agent Keen, but we are more than happy to hand over the information on the biological weapon lady. She wasn't that great in bed and she got us confused with someone who'd help her for our own interests. Apparently the knowledge and name of 'The White Knight' escaped her minuscule mind." He listened. "We're at home actually. Yes, that's home. Thank you. That'd be great." He grinned. "Thanks." He hung up. "She'll be out tomorrow with her partner and she'll try to talk to Red about his minion. Speaking of, go save him from the ladies?"
"I can do that." He went to get the poor guy out from under all the fussing. "Ladies, let him rest," he ordered as he walked in. Even the minion pouted. "We finally got hold of someone who could tell Red. Agent Keen got told we're not giving you to her."
"Thank you," he croaked. The ladies tucked him in better then left to let him rest. Alex smiled, following them out. The ladies were really sweet
Xander was barely up when the door got knocked on, him blinking at the two on the doorstep. "I need to date women more like you than the psychos I've gotten recently. I know only dangerous ones like me but damn."
She snorted, smirking at him. "There's not many like me." She stepped in. "This is Agent Ressler, my partner."
Xander grunted and nodded. "We're just barely awake. Let me start coffee. Alex!" he called. No answer. He whistled and a flying helper zipped in. "Go get up Alex." The thing flashed a message. "Alex is at school with the protectee's kids. Okay. Thanks." He made coffee, pulling down three mugs. "My twin is with the kids."
"What protectees?" she asked, sitting on a stool.
"When we accidentally had to take over for a warlord, we liberated his slaves but some had a price put on their heads by their families. So we're protecting them while they learn how to be free people with skills. We put their kids into a good school, they're learning english and life skills. They live in the house out back. Refused to live in here." He sipped and grunted, going to the office. "Let me get that stuff from her."
"Can you tell me which minion it is?" she called after him.
"He's down here but probably being fussed over by our protectees." He pointed at a door before heading into the office.
She knocked then walked in, taking his picture. "Red wasn't sure which one had gotten kidnaped by someone."
"She was my sister."
"Was?" she asked.
"I'm hoping it's a was. The twins tied her up and locked her in her biowarfare safe room with the alarms on. Only she could override it." He smirked. "I'm fine. The twins had to take a shaft of titanium out of my side, barely missed my liver. They've field treated me very well. They really should take the full doctorate degree."
"I'll let him know." She sent that text message, getting one back almost instantly. "Red said he's on the west coast of Japan. He'll send someone local so you can escape the fussing."
"The ladies are really nice. I'd like to introduce them to Dembe, see if one liked him."
"I'll let him know. As far as I know you're not in any trouble for being a hostage and I'm not reporting you either. Until Red's people come get you, you stay with the twins."
"Yes, ma'am, and I'll gladly spill about my sister, the troll."
"Female trolls are pretty according to the Myth Inc books," Xander quipped as he leaned in. "It's male trolls that're ugly. Though it does fit your sister very well." He handed over the sealed package. "The biotoxin powder is still sealed in there. She made the mistake of having us wait in the lab while she took a call. We were on the way up to her office before our date when we spotted the package and the hostage in there."
"Do you date women like that usually?" she asked.
Xander nodded with a grin. "Only dangerous or deadly ones love us like our twin, Agent Keen. We have no idea why but from our first one on it's been dangerous, deadly, or both. Of both sexes." He strolled off. "If you find a nice agent who's tough like you, can you introduce us?"
"I can try that," she said dryly, following him. Ressler took the package to look at. "Why not call the locals?"
"First, it's to do with Red, and we'd never do that to him," Xander said. "Second, the locals hate us because we went around them a few times when they were stupid dicks. Seriously. They put a detective undercover in the mob, then put another *local* detective in his place pretending to be him." She moaned. Her partner shook his head with a sigh. "Yeah. Then they left the first one to swing without an exit strategy, which is when we got involved when he asked us to." He stared at her. "They're vampire bait mostly. There may be a few smart ones but apparently they never come out of the office."
"Quite possibly," Ressler said. "The local office has that reputation. Who do you usually work with for things that agents might need to know, Mr. Harris?"
"Senior Agent Barrings at Homeland. He's presently grounded to his desk because his boss was the one that told the reporters about stuff." He grinned. "The reporter rushed up to my twin asking when we joined the Council. We had heard she had been looking at our files because she hates the Council. So he kindly gave the reporter her name to ask."
Ressler winced. "That's caused a huge amount of stink. They're thinking another Congressional hearing about that."
"We told them about seven of the battles we had down there. Six of which were classified because their people wanted to ignore they happened. The other three.... They didn't ask about." He made himself another cup of coffee and sipped from it. The ladies came in chattering and carrying stuff. "I know he's up. Agent Keen," he said with a point at her. "Had to talk to him. She works with Red on something." They smiled at her and one nodded before going down to fuss over their poor man. Xander grinned. "We're protecting them and their families."
"It's a nice thing to do," she said. "I spent last night looking at your profile in the system." Xander burst out giggling, leaning on the counter to shake his head. "That wasn't my feeling. How much of it is right?"
He grinned at her. "Depends, did you get the one before or after Willow wiki'd it?"
"Shit," Ressler muttered. He pulled out the copy. "Can you fill in stuff for us? It'd help us a lot."
"We have permission to have weapons, Agent Ressler."
"I saw that. Both allowances were in there." He stared at him. "There was also tape of the weapons you guys made in testing. Thank you for not destroying St. Louis but it looked very handy." Xander nodded with a grin. "We'd just really like a semi-factual account so we know what to come to you guys about instead of the main people."
"We're kind of the more ...militant arm of the Council at times," Xander admitted. "Not that we're all 'kill them all' or anything but if it takes something like a rescue, we'd do that. We have in the past. We do now. We went with Clay's team to rescue the slayers that got taken hostage. The slayers bitched at Clay heavily about bringing us. They had no idea we had saved the ones in Africa more than once." He took another drink.
"We figured you knew what you were doing. Reddington doesn't talk about anyone who's not competent and he brought Agent Keen to see you about that translation."
Xander grinned. "We were a mere go-between that time. We didn't read that one." He finished his coffee and popped a bagel into the toaster. "Can I make you guys one?"
"We ate on the way over," Agent Keen said.
Xander settled in to see what was in their report. "Wow, someone edited it on Willow. That's not even our birthday." He took a pen from Ressler and started to mark through things, then making notes beside it. "Is this a cousin maybe?" he asked them.
"If it's that wrong, I'd hope so but someone's getting chewed a new one," Keen said. The door opened and someone walked in. "Dembe." He nodded politely.
"Hey, man." Xander grinned at him. "Let me show you where he is." He walked him off, twiddling with the pen. "Alex and I had to remove the titanium rod from his side. It barely scraped his liver. We contained all the bleeding and all that. He's healing well. No infection. We had some antibiotics in our field kit we used." The big guy nodded. Xander knocked then opened the door. "Ladies, his people are here for him." They pouted at Dembe. "These are the protectees, Dembe. We're saving them from the prices on their heads after we accidentally took over in Dumara."
He nodded. "You do good work, ladies. May I have him?" he asked. They pouted but nodded, helping get the poor guy up and dressed so he could go. "You did good, Alex."
"I'm Xander, Dembe. Eyepatch."
He smiled. "You're easy to confuse."
"Sometimes. Thankfully the lady that nearly killed him and had us hostage to date wasn't that good either." Dembe snorted but took the minion with him. "You guys be safe."
"You as well," Dembe said. "Mr. Reddington said thank you."
"Not a problem. We tried to call him directly but couldn't find the new number." Dembe nodded, helping his coworker out to the car. Xander went back to the kitchen. "He'll be okay."
"That's good," Elizabeth said with a smile. "I called in about the file. The one who screwed all that up was found and captured a bit ago. We have another file but it may be one that your friend Willow ...wiki'd."
Xander waved his hand back and forth in the air while pouring more coffee and buttering his bagel. "She's not the same friend I had since the first day of kindergarten, Agent Keen. That's by her choice. According to her I'm *normal*. Me and my twin both."
She blinked a few times. "You're ...normal?"
"Yup." He grinned, taking a bite of bagel.
"You two took on a hell goddess in Africa with cobbled together weapons. That's not normal," Ressler said.
"I'd hug you but you're not the dangerous sort that likes us," Xander quipped with a grin. "But if you find one, we'll gladly hug them instead."
"If I find one I'll send them your dossier so they can see if they want to date you," he shot back. He looked at Keen then at him. "How long has that normal thing been going on?"
"Since Willow got magic and suddenly it was two special girls back in high school." He shrugged. "It happens I guess. We put up with it, we survived, we proved them wrong." He shrugged again and ate another bite of bagel then sipped some coffee.
"I don't consider the twins who could take out a cloud of plagues a normal person," she said.
"Anyone could've wished that thing to be dead," he said. "We tried other methods and went with a semi-mundane one when they didn't work."
She stared at him. "I don't think many people would've considered wishing it away. Praying to any God that would hear them but not a wish demon." He smiled. "Can we go over your dossier while we get this biological substance taken care of?"
"Sure. We like the local guys in SWAT, they helped us when Max came after us. Our Homeland contact couldn't be reached and no one else wanted to step in." He shrugged. "But they did real good."
"I can go to them for that." She smiled, calling in to get the locals there to help her with that. "Did she have anything else?"
"I think you saw the warehouse fire," he said dryly. "I know it was on the local news." He grinned.
"Good idea with a bio-warfare lab," Ressler agreed. "Can we go over some of the other senior Council's dossiers as well?"
"I don't know all but maybe."
"That'll help. They have a few things that look wrong as well." He got back to Xander's dossier with him. The other ones got a few odd looks but it wasn't anyone who could answer back's fault that a cheerleader was saving the world.
That night, they reported to their boss. "Did we get the results from the toxin?" Agent Keen asked as she walked into his office.
Deputy Director Cooper stared at her. "Yes, we did. They did a good job binding it in there that way. The lab was very pleased with them. The tox panel said it was really nasty." He handed over that emailed printout. She grimaced as she read it. "Which minion was it?"
"Not one we have a file on," Ressler said. "His sister was the germ doc though. The twins saved him from her too."
"Good to know." He stared at them. "So, you two survived while sane? It's said that a bit of insanity does follow them. Even Gibbs' team has been acting a bit odd."
"Gibbs' is probably about lacking coffee," Ressler said dryly. "We got one of the twins to look at his file to correct some things."
"We had him go over the basics on a few other senior Council members," Elizabeth agreed.
"That's what would drive me nuts," Ressler said. He laid them out. Cooper took them to look over, grimacing at some things. "Xander also said that Congress didn't ask about a few incidences down there. So they didn't mention them."
"He also asked if I find an agent who's tough, a bit dangerous, and nicer than what usually likes them to introduce them," she said with a smile for her partner.
"They could use it. This is their third germ doc who wanted to date them, Keen."
"Thankfully they could handle it without help," Cooper said. He put down the files. "Who is their usual liaison?"
"Barrings, Homeland," she said. "I left them our cards just in case, sir."
"Good!" He leaned back. "Someone is thinking about making an apocalypse battle response team."
"Good luck," Ressler said. "I asked about jumping in if I'm close to one. They suggested I learn how to behead with a sword or a machete as well as some specialty ammo. They gave us a nice list and a folder that they gave to local militaries in Africa. It's their starter list and then they'd hand over a classification manual." He put that onto the desk too. "Then a few days of showing them how to properly behead, stake, and the like."
"So they did teach locals?" Cooper asked. They both nodded. "That's a great idea. I know there's a lot of people within the government who hate the idea of young women saving us all."
"I'm sad for them but glad it's not just one any more," Keen said.
"Me too," Ressler said. Cooper nodded he agreed. "Also, we asked them about some of their design work. They're looking at making some of the weapons they're making less powerful. They're still a mess of duct tape and solder at times but they work."
"They don't have the formal training. I did call in to our range to see if they knew where the twins could get that sort of training, outside the military," Elizabeth said. "There's a few programs that could train them to do things that look less messy."
"That's fine. It's a great idea since that's how the slayers get higher weapons," Cooper said. "Are they selling to others?"
"Not at this point. I don't think even Red's asked them," she said.
"Even better." He stared at the files then at them. "Good work. Let's see if that germ doc is still around."
"Blew up in her lab/warehouse," Ressler said with a smile. "We talked to a local news station to see the full film on the fire. Local PD got told it had a chem lab inside so they could share that information. The local FBI office didn't even attend." Cooper winced. "The twins said that they're useless and one of the twins threw a stake at one for being whiny about something."
"They apparently put a detective undercover, then put another, local, detective in his place using his name," Elizabeth said with a smile.
"That makes absolutely no sense," Cooper said. He got into his computer. "Name?"
"Vecchio is the detective who went undercover. He came to the twins to help him get free."
He looked that name up, staring at it in horrified awe. "Someone needs to have a talk with them." He looked up.
"Have fun with that, sir," Ressler said with a grin. "The twins trust some of the local officers, have a local liaison for Council and big things. Who happens to have a Mountie working with him periodically."
"Which I personally thought was weird," Elizabeth said. "But Constable Fraser did seem nice enough. Him and his half-wolf Diefenbaker."
Cooper held up a hand. "Don't. Please. It's in the files." He looked at them. "Take tomorrow off." They smiled and left. He made notes on what they had told him then took them personally to the director. "Sir," he said as he was let into his office. "My team is back from Chicago."
"Are they nuts?" he asked, looking up. "We've noticed Gibbs is a bit looser after his time working on that problem."
"A bit goofy from the flight," he admitted. "Agent Ressler talked one of the twins into correcting part of his file." He put that in front of him. The director read it. He tried not to show how much it upset him but there were small tells Cooper caught. "Also some correcting on some of the other files associated." He put those down.
"That's good. This biological weapon?" The printed out email was handed over. "That's nasty."
"The twins handled it themselves, sir. Agents Keen and Ressler asked the local tv station to watch the film of the fire they used on her lab. Apparently it was good. The locals got told it was a lab so they could handle it properly. The local office didn't even come out."
"Charming," he growled. He looked up. "You look too gleeful for this to be all." He handed over the printed copy of that other file. The director read it and scratched an eyebrow. "Who?"
"Someone in the Chicago office. There's multiple names on the file, sir. Apparently that detective went to the twins to get an exit when he was done."
The director read the full file on his computer, shaking his head. "Someone needs to go visiting."
"Which is why I brought it to your attention, sir."
"The minion they called in about?" He looked at him.
"Agent Ressler said we didn't have anything on him. The twins saved him from the germ doc and did minor field treating on his injuries. Agent Ressler submitted a short report on him." He handed that file over.
"Good of them. I notice they're weapons designers?"
"They tested some things for the Pentagon," Cooper said. "Reddington was most amused." The director looked up that testing and called over there to get a copy of the tapes. They both saw the testing tape. Cooper smiled at the end. "They seem like nice enough young men who handle things."
"I noticed a few of those at the battle in St. Louis," the director said. Cooper smiled. "Can they call us when they have problems?"
"Apparently they only date dangerous people, sir. The germ doc was a date."
"Ask Reddington to fix their files." He handed them back. "Including the things that they haven't told Congress if you can."
"I can do that. Though Ressler's report did say that Miss Rosenburg may have...they called it wik'd, the files."
"Great," he said quietly. "Probably protective with the way some agents are idiots."
"I figured so as well."
"Sure. We can do that. Get him to fill in the rest of that file, and any others he can fill in for us. I'd like to know who's on our side and what'll make them turn."
"Agreed. Anything else, sir? I gave the two agents tomorrow off."
"They probably need it. Go. I'll handle Chicago's messy office." Cooper nodded and left. The director took a few antacids and got back to the files. These people were the good guys who saved the world instead of the government? They were screwed.
Agent Ressler looked up as the elevator opened and Reddington walked off it with his bodyguard behind him. "Is your minion all right?"
"He's good. I had a doctor I know check him over. The twins do good work. The doctor even replaced the prescriptions they used on him." He smiled smugly. "The twins learned what they had to work very well." He settled at the table. "Cooper called?"
Elizabeth walked out of her office, handing him files. "The director wanted to know if you could please fix and fill in their files. I've been working on Faith's."
Red looked at her then at the files, smiling at them. "I doubt they're very correct."
"I asked Xander to please help correct his," Ressler said.
"That could help. I can't add much. They're interesting but there's not much that's known thanks to the former hellmouth." He picked up that one first. He made a few corrections then started a list of names. "Who they've dated or slept with that I know of."
Ressler took that list to look at, blinking. "How many of them are on your list?"
"Only the two I've starred." He looked at her. "Lizzy, did you find that germ doc?"
"As far as anyone knows, she died in the fire. They found a body inside a safe room, which is where they said they had left her."
"Good. That's practical of them. They do so hate virologists."
She groaned. "Do they have a reason to?"
"Yes." He smiled. "They won't let anyone take samples though. They said they'd rather not know than have the information possibly leak out when I asked about that topic. I introduced one of my associates to them and she had fun."
"Good to know," Ressler said, looking up names. "Are they black widows?"
"No. The one taking out their non-useful ex's is another ex," Red said. "I'm not certain which one at this time." Ressler nodded, making notes on that list. Red went back to the files, making more notes.
Elizabeth Keen went back to looking at the official files for those who had them.
Ray Vecchio finally had his last meeting with the FBI team that had sent him undercover. All the depositions, all the information hand overs, all that was done. He was free after this meeting. This meeting was to argue about him going into protective custody. Ray was going to sic his mother on these agents. That way they could tell her he had to leave again. "No," he said slowly and clearly. "I'm not going into protective custody. There's no one there to threaten me."
"He had enemies."
"So do I from catching criminals."
"These ones can go internationally."
"Then what makes you think I'll be safer under your watch?" The two agents grimaced. "Beyond that, I'm needed here in Chicago. At the very least by my family."
Someone knocked and walked in. "Boys, let's talk," the older man said.
"Who're you?" one of the lesser agents demanded.
"Deputy Director Fornell." He smiled at the detective. "Give us a few please." He led them out to talk to them. "I'm here to clean up this office of stupid ideas." One of them flinched. "The director saw the notes on this operation and had to take something for his upset stomach. Explain what's going on now to me."
"You're not our boss," one said.
"I am," Fornell said with an evil smirk. He held up the authorization he had gotten from the director after dinner last night. "I'm here to remake your office, boys." They both winced. "So let's start with the stupid. I got ordered to start with this situation."
"We've followed all the rules," the other one huffed.
"Really?" he asked dryly. "Including that you had the plan that came from the bottom of the barrel of stupid?" They tried to walk off. "Fine, I'll handle this. You're losing your badges." He went in there, smiling slightly at the detective. "So," he said.
"You're right, it was. If I had known they'd be putting another local guy in my place I would've pointed out the flaws."
"I have the feeling those two were too dumb to figure out what you were talking about, Vecchio." He sat down across from him. "How far has the debrief gone?"
"I'm fully done. They're arguing with me about witness protection."
"We can definitely put you into it if you think it's necessary."
Vecchio smirked. "No, I don't, which is why we were having a discussion, again."
"Ah." Fornell nodded. "If you think it's safe, we'll let you go back to work. You are to call immediately if they try to come after you for this and at that point we'll help you go into protective custody. Agreed?"
"Definitely. That's what I've been trying to get them to agree to."
"Then can we talk you into being the twins' overseeing guy instead of going back to the precinct?"
Vecchio smirked. "I've tried to reinstall their common sense a few times. So has Colonel Clay."
"I know. I met them with Gibbs." He smirked a tiny bit. "They had to call a special FBI project because a germ doc wanted to date them."
Vecchio sat up. "The fire."
"Yes." He smirked a bit more. "With her in there, which we didn't mind. Any idea why they're so paranoid about those sort?"
"Not a clue. They wouldn't tell me that yet."
"That's fine. Do you think they can handle having an overseer that close?"
"Maybe. They could use someone to lean on and mentor them back toward a normal life again. Even they've said that. I'm more worried about living without a paycheck again. It's been over a year since I got one and my family counts on that."
"I can understand that but I'd have to check to see if we can put you on that way. The city might not mind and pay you to do that too. They could even help you out with cases since they're good at finding sources of problems to date."
"Could be," he agreed, looking amused. "Guys like Armando would've loved the twins."
"That's something we're worried about," Fornell admitted. "They already seem to know a good few problem people. Someone that special project is working with handed over a list of who he knew they had dated. It made the director drink dinner, after he took things for his stomach due to this case and this office."
"The twins are good boys, usually. They still excuse some things due to their pasts and the school system out there being so bad."
Fornell nodded. "We looked into that for Congress. I borrowed the report for them. The school was so far below standards it made the standards think they were an echo." Vecchio winced. "Though they did have someone there that made a lifelike robot."
"Great. Evil geeks. Just what the world needs," Ray said dryly.
Fornell smirked at him. "Exactly. I'll get that salary cleared at what you should be paid as a detective of your rank. I'll let you know later. For now, do you know where the twins are?"
"The last I knew sulking to cartoons."
"Then they may be missing. Is the Colonel in town?" Ray nodded. "I'll call him then. Go relax. Spoil your mother." He got up. "I'll call the twins' house later." He left to go straighten out the other problems going on. He walked past an interrogation room then went inside. "Why are you two here?"
"Apparently us being Council and weapons designers bothers them," Alex said dryly. Xander nodded, looking peeved. "One of them tried to kill my twin. He's damn lucky I remembered we're in the US and dirty agents can't be taken out by anyone here."
Fornell nodded once. "Vecchio, take them with you." He waved and the twins went with him. Fornell followed. The agents that tried to get in their way got hauled off by Fornell to see what their malfunction was. So some more of them got to lose their jobs this pretty spring day.
Ray looked up from helping his mother pick out a dress, sneering at the reporter that was trying to get her camera into the shop. "Ma, watch out," he said quietly. She looked at the girl then snorted, moving to pick out something prettier. Ray handed her something, earning a smile and a pat on the cheek for it. Ray glared at the reporter. "Why are you bothering my mother?" he demanded.
"Detective, it's said that you were responsible for sixteen agents losing their job due to a case you worked?" she asked with a perky smile.
"Fourteen, all FBI," he corrected blandly. "Talk to their people, not me."
His mother came out to look in the mirror, shooting something in Italian at the girl. Ray tried not to grin about it. "I didn't know you were a newly immigrated family," the reporter chirped happily. "It wasn't in any information anywhere."
"We're not," Ray said, looking at her over the top of his sunglasses. "My mother has manners, unlike so many young women today. She didn't think she should call you that in English where everyone else would understand it." He walked off. "You're bothering us. Go away before I have mall security throw you out, miss."
"It's a public space, Detective. I'm within my rights to find people here."
He looked at her. "Do you think that'll save you from going into the fountain with that camera?" She huffed off. His mother gave him a pointed look over her shoulder. "So maybe I'm missing my mean days," he admitted with a grin. "You need to go up a size, Ma. They shrank that one." She swatted him but went to try it on in her size. Ray sent a message to Stanley to warn him they were trying things. Ray was sure Stanley would be happy to help him run off the reporters.
Alex walked past the reporter trying to hover around their fence. "I'm sorry, Miss Leachy one, but we're not talking to you again," he said dryly with a smile. "We don't believe in press attention."
"You have weapons. You used them in St. Louis."
"Correction, we made them for St. Louis," he said dryly, smirking at her. She took a step back, looking scared. "Good idea. Get off our lawn. Now please. If I have to ask again, I'm going to ask a few demon contacts if they'd like to court you." She fled. He smirked and waved. "Have a good run and quit doing blood sacrifices for stories, dear. It's not like we don't hear that sort of news!" He walked into the house, past Jensen. "Hi."
"She's sacrificing people for stories?" he asked, following Alex to the kitchen. "Really? Does anyone else know?"
"I have no idea but someone really should wonder why so many journalism students keep dropping out of college after disappearing." He grinned.
Jensen nodded. "Have you told Stanley yet?"
"No. He hasn't asked."
"Let's go talk about those and other rumors like that. Stan would probably really like to get that reporter gone."
"She's on someone else's sacrificial list." He shrugged. "I figured it'd sort itself out."
"Maybe but maybe we can stop that too. Okay? Serial killers are bad, even if they do want to date you guys. Please? Just let Stan know? That way you guys can pass on the bad evil ones and keep the good evil ones."
"The one planning to sacrifice her is trying to do an earth healing spell."
"Still. Please?" He grinned. "Grab sodas and lunch, we'll go sit at Stan's desk to tell him about those interesting things."
"There's only seven I've heard about."
"Seven's way too many for a city, Xander."
"Not all are here, Jensen."
"Even better! It'll look really good on Stan's career." Alex rolled his eyes but went with him, with a stop at a store to pick up a big gulp sized soda and a set of snack cakes. Jensen smiled at the cops as they walked into the station. "He's heard rumors about some sacrificing people. Is Stan in?"
"Kowalski ran out a bit ago with the Mountie and the wolf," the desk sergeant said. "I can have his lieutenant ask him." He called up there, buzzing them through the gate. "Go on up, Corporal and Harris." He said something when the phone was answered.
Jensen walked Alex up there, grinning at the detectives. "He just told me earlier that he heard about some sacrificing people."
"Lieutenant Welsh is in his office," one of the detectives said with a point. They went in there after a quick knock. The others would help but they didn't want messed up with demon stuff.
Alex grinned at the lieutenant. "Hoho?" he asked, holding one out.
"I'll eat it after lunch if I can defend it from Diefenbaker. Sit, tell me what you guys have heard." They settled on the lumpy old couch he had to talk about the rumors they had been hearing. The lieutenant took good notes and they went over the one doing the earth healing spell. Sure, it could help, but human sacrifice was always the wrong way to do anything. Hopefully the twins realized that.
During it, Vecchio came in with the other twin, who knew about one of the guys when he looked at the notes being made. A few were internationally known so they'd have to tell the FBI. They suggested they go to Red's contact. She seemed nice enough and could pass on stuff to people who could handle it. They were still hoping she found someone like her for them to date.
In DC, a computer chimed. "Keen, new email to the project's email," he called.
She looked over. "What? Who sent it, Aram?"
"Someone from the Chicago PD." She came over to look at it, then groaned. "He does sound like someone we should be tracking down."
"It's nice the twins decided I'm good to hand evil ones to," she said dryly. "Tell Cooper so he can decide who to send it to. Or, hold on, let me make sure he's not a blacklister." She sent a text to Reddington's phone, getting back a 'no, he's just annoying but human sacrificing wasn't that unusual for that one, tell the twins I said hello'. She sent back a response and he sent the file to Cooper's desk to be handed over. They all heard the boss groan but handle it. Maybe she'd talk to Reddington about how the twins seemed to be growing into him, only not in the criminal underground.
Vecchio looked at the two boys, then shook his head. "Why are you two dressed like rent boys?"
"Clubbing," Xander quipped with a grin. "We like to club and it's usually safe."
"Unless someone tries to snatch us again, then we're allowed to stab them," Alex agreed.
"You two are weird. Why don't you go somewhere classy?"
"Because then we get picked up by bigger bad guys and girls," Alex said dryly with a smirk. "They love us all pretty and dressed up."
"There's places no one like that would go," Ray said. "Go get all prettied up. I'll take you somewhere better."
"You're going armed, right?" Xander asked before walking off.
"Even if he isn't, I am," Alex promised. "You can hide a few weapons with the way your suit's fitted."
Ray sighed but went to get his service piece and backup knife. It couldn't be that bad, right?
Two hours later, Ray was looking at the staring SWAT commander, shrugging back at the awed look. "I'm done with my undercover. I took them to a nice wine bar. Usually just ladies from the neighborhood sort. I could've sworn there weren't any bad girls there."
The SWAT commander nodded. "We got an anonymous email from Cleveland telling us about them dating. That way we could prepare how to rescue them." They moved in together, with Ray behind the team. They made it in there with only two minions needing to be taken down. The main bad girl had a male someone who was fighting with Xander, and Xander was winning. Alex was unconscious. Xander was nearly feral. Now they knew what would happen if one twin got hurt. It wasn't pretty. Then the bad girl screamed and lunged at Xander, who had just stabbed her whatever-he-did male with a wicked looking knife. He swung it at her, getting her neck. "Boy, move," the SWAT commander ordered.
"She wanted to use my twin for parts and keep me," Xander sneered, staring down at her. "You might be able to save her."
Ray walked over, slowly moving Xander back. "Is Alex hurt?" he asked quietly and calmly, making Xander calm down.
"She stuck a needle in his neck but I think he's only sedated." He huffed and stomped over to his twin, moving the paramedic out of the way. "Mine," he growled.
"We can take him to the ER, sir," the paramedic said, glancing at Ray then at the knife then back at Ray.
"We can't do bloodwork on him," Xander said, staring up at him. "There's a really great chance it'll get us kidnaped by even more evil shits than this one."
"Okay, so we'll just do a tox screen, which won't pick up anything but drugs in his system," Ray said, nodding. He helped Xander up, taking the knife and tossing it toward the team so they could bag it up. "C'mon, we'll follow the ambulance and if they're bad guys we'll cap 'em." Xander glared at him. "Really, I can do that."
"I can too. I learned in Africa." The paramedic team lifted Alex up and took him out to the ambulance. Xander stomped after them, looking pissed at everything. Alex moaned so Xander ran up to grab his arm. "I'm right here, I'm okay," he said in his ear. "She sedated you." Alex growled. "I know. Ray said you have to go to the ER instead. I'm right here." Alex growled and huffed at the paramedic with them. "No, no hyena," he hissed in his ear. "I'll protect you. You know that." Alex went limp but stayed unhappy and growling. The paramedic was giving him an odd look. "It's an old possession."
"Sure," he agreed. "Is he dangerous? They might lock him in a little room for that."
Xander frowned. "It's not our fault we got possessed."
"The docs won't believe that, sir."
"That's their shit." He brought Alex out and back to human. He was still growling but now glaring. "Hi. If you stayed in hyena land they'd put you in psych."
"Like. Hell," Alex groaned. "I'm not going to the ER."
"We'd need the report for the police," the paramedic said. "We're not going to do any bloodwork outside looking at any drugs she gave you, sir."
Alex sat up with a groan, plus a helping hand from his twin. He stared at the paramedic. "No. I'm not going to the ER," he repeated quietly and firmly. "Let us out. Now. We don't want the problems it'd bring. The city wouldn't either." The driver pulled over and they got out, heading off.
Ray caught them and gave them a ride home. He could talk some sense into them. He was about to before Jensen held up a paper with a nice story about white guys busting someone collecting germs in Africa. "Them?" Ray asked.
"Yup," Jensen said. "There would be a *lot* worse class of dates if others found out." He stood up, taking Ray down to the level under the working areas and the office. "Like he said, they have the whole batcave down here." Down here was a few other work areas, including a chemical lab for some reason. There was also a medical bay. Jensen walked in. "Can I help?"
"He mostly just needs to sleep it off," Xander said. He looked at Ray. "Sorry but it's highly unlikely you're going to get us near a doctor of any sort at any given point in time unless we're dying."
"I get that. We'll still need some blood to test for whatever drugs she gave him. She could make to trial so they'll need it. The prosecutor's a bitch about that stuff, Xander."
"I don't care. That means it could get out and then we'd have a whole lot more problems. Even Clay's full team couldn't keep us safe if that gets out."
Jensen nodded. "I only assume about two things. There was a news story about the germ lab in Guinea." Xander winced. "There was also a news story about wherever you saved Brianna from." Xander shuddered. He looked at Ray. "Can you make sure they only check for the drugs that he got given?"
"Yeah, I can do that." He let Xander draw some blood and headed to the lab. On the way he called Stan's ex to meet him there. He walked in and got the head guy there to meet with him and Stella. He looked at her when she stomped in. "I'm sure you've heard by now SWAT just helped rescue the guys we have from the Council." He played with the vial of blood. She nodded, grimacing. "There's a problem with running their blood. This goes no further." He looked at the lab guy, who nodded. "The twins busted a germ lab in Africa." Stella groaned, sitting down. "They do not want their blood tested. That's why they escaped from the ambulance." He tapped the blood vial. "According to them, there's possibly things that would mean even a whole commando team couldn't keep them safe. The problem is that one of them was knocked out by a drug."
"Which I'd need to know to bring it to trial," Stella said.
Ray nodded. "Which makes them very panicky, Stella." He handed over the blood. "They apparently know there's someone who'd love to use them for their blood and parts. They're all but ready to start carrying *more* weapons all the time."
"Is there a test that would only tell that and nothing else?" she asked the head of the lab.
"Yes. The usual toxicology test wouldn't usually catch any disease even if they're presently sick. I can run that myself and give you the only copy of the report then destroy the blood in our furnace."
"Please do," she said, handing the blood vial over. "I'm not sure if they're going to manage to save the people's lives."
"She knocked Alex out and Xander went apeshit," Ray told her simply. "Growling and all."
She nodded. "I've seen twins doing that before." The lab head went to run that. He came back while they were talking, handing over the report. She read it. "Is that a sedative?"
"Yes. It's got something in it that would suppress an immunity system as well."
"Xander said the lady wanted to use Alex for parts and keep him," Ray said.
Stella grimaced but nodded. "I can handle that. What if the defense guy asks about why we only did this test?"
"Either they can claim it's a bad idea and tell the judge or they can refuse to answer," Ray said. "Make 'em take a deal."
"I can try that." She left with the results. Ray went back to the twins to tell them how it had went. They could be paranoid but it'd hopefully get easier to handle.
Stella showed up a day later. Ray let her in and took her back to where the boys were. "My boss wants to know why they're so paranoid and is thinking about charging them with obstructing the paramedics."
Alex leaned out to look at her. "I can have his soul deal called in for him."
"Why punish any hell realm that way, boys. He makes the rest of us look more competent by being in charge." She walked into the kitchen, looking at them. "We can have it quietly run."
"There is no system you can run that on that can't be hacked," Jensen said from his seat. He looked at her. "There's enough evil ones who want to know that it will be hacked." She grimaced. "Beyond that, putting them into more danger isn't really legal."
"He's getting a judge to order a test. He's already told me he's going to try."
Jensen held out the news stories. "You can tell him they were there. That would create a huge problem."
"Which would probably make us leave and go somewhere safer," Xander said dryly. She winced but nodded he might be right. "I'm calling someone to have his soul deal called in." He reached for his phone.
"The antigen test can be run by drops in a dish," she said. "Can we do it that way?"
"A few are really old strains," Alex said. "I fell into a burial chamber once. Nearly died of it."
She nodded. "I can call to tell him that." She walked out back to call her boss to tell him that. She left, going to the courthouse. She walked into the judge's chambers, seeing her smirking boss. "Your Honor, the twins have a good reason to be so paranoid." She put the news story down in front of him. "They said they know that they caught something. They've had a few others who wanted their blood already. Do we really need that sort coming to town to try to kidnap two weapons designers?"
The judge winced. "They are?"
"Yes, sir. A test of one of their things is why the CPD had to build a new range building. It was their weapons in St. Louis."
He grimaced. "Them being somewhere safer would be better for them."
"They're pretty safe here. They have a CPD liaison and a semi-former detective living with them. He's off a federal undercover. The CPD is paying him to watch over them. As proven by last night's date, there's bad people out there who'd like to own them."
"Then maybe they should go back to Cleveland," the head prosecutor said with a smile.
"They're not from there," she said bluntly. "They can't live there. The hellmouth they grew up on reacts poorly to the one in Cleveland. Unless you'd like to see it open and that city fall with them spreading all over the US?" She smiled at his shudder. "By the way, they said something about your soul contract. Apparently they were very certain about it, Doug." He stomped off. She looked at the judge. "It really is not safe."
"Do they know?"
"They have assumptions and they're not willing to find out for certain as there's no way that someone can't hack the results. The military tech ops corporal told me so."
He considered it. "Do we know what they were dosed with that night?"
"Yes. Detective Vecchio...."
"Ah, that undercover," he said dryly.
She smiled. "He's mentoring the twins wonderfully. Took them to the nice bar instead of letting them go clubbing. That's where she picked them up."
"He came to me and the head of the lab about this concern. The head of the lab ran that test himself to make sure the results weren't spread around."
"That's reasonable I suppose." He sighed, looking at the order again then at her. "Shouldn't someone know?"
"Do we know anyone that trustworthy?" she countered. "That absolutely can't be made to tell? Even Constable Fraser might spill it sometime when forced to."
"That's a very good point." He ripped up the order. "I'll accept it and talk to the other judges about it, DA Kowalski. Tell them to be less paranoid? I've heard they're already jumpy."
"And they design very strong weapons," she said with a smile.
"Then definitely find them someone nice to date if you can." She nodded and left, going to tell them that. He went to interrupt the idiot head DA with another judge. He had the head judge call a sudden meeting to let that be known. That way no one forced that order. Chicago would not survive the twins having to protect themselves from that sort of person.
A few months later, a professor stood in front of his profiling candidates. He started the film he had been given by a contact. They had been handed to Homeland to help with a profiling problem. It was supposedly their memories of events that had been covered up by the press. It was about a set of twins who hunted demons of all things; clearly something that needed to be solved and the sort of deviant personality that his future profilers would have to deal with. "Profile the one fighting," he said. The students watched the film, making notes during things.
Agent Ressler walked into the room. Agent Keen was behind him. "There's a federal court cease and desist order," he announced. "Those were not to get out of Homeland Security's hand and were only to be used to update someone's dossier on their actions."
"How dare you!" the professor shouted. "You can't do that."
"We're with the FBI. Yes we can," Agent Keen said. "Also, that's not very indicative of his or his twin's personality." She handed over the cease and desist order. "You're to hand over all copies of that immediately."
"No one can do that."
"Yes, they can," she said. "There's also C&D orders from three people who showed up as possessed in various memories of theirs." She handed those over as well, staring at him. "Beyond that, this isn't going to teach them to profile complicated personalities like these twins."
"They're not complicated," he snorted.
"I sat with them for almost a day going over their files," Ressler said. "Yes, they are."
She nodded. "I'm a profiler myself. They're a lot more complicated than while they're in battle conditions." He sneered. She glared back. "We can arrest you and hand you to Homeland Security since those were stolen from their files. Whoever got you those files is in deep since those were classified as presidential eyes only." He winced. "Now, the tapes?" He got them off his computer and handed them over. "Thank you, Professor. I never had you, I had Dr. Simmons instead." She walked off with Ressler behind her. She rolled her eyes once they were outside. "That's why I didn't take classes from him."
"I can see why. What a pompous ass."
"He seems to be the definition." They saw an agent style SUV pull up and walked over to it. Senior Agent Barrings got out. She handed over the tapes. "Can we arrest the one that leaked it?"
"We have," the driver assured them.
Ressler smiled. "Someone called the possessed people in one of those and they all got C&D orders."
"Good!" Barrings said. "I threw up for so long my boss asked if I was pregnant." He looked at Keen. "They're good boys most of the time. Just now and then they have to be warriors."
She nodded. "I know that feeling." He grinned. "Are they okay?"
"Xander's healed a lot from that kidnaping attempt. Alex said he's not having more nightmares."
"That's good. When is the next battle?"
Barrings winced. "Later this week in town."
"Oh, no," Ressler sighed. "Where?"
"Someone's doing an ascension and we can't do a thing about them until they've changed. But the good thing is that it's going to be a smaller one than their graduation's one."
"Their... graduation?" Ressler asked.
"Those of us who know the twins are having a meeting tonight at a bar," the driver said. "You two were going to be invited anyway." He handed over a card. "They'll bring weapons."
"Sure," she agreed. "Thanks."
"Welcome, Agent Keen. We're probably going to see some bad boys and girls coming out to help or fleeing in terror due to it." They nodded. They went back to report that to Deputy Director Cooper. He came with them to the meeting that night. They settled in with drinks to watch the video taken from some parent's video camera. Keen blinked at the breaking out of the human skin.
"Eww," Ressler said quietly. He couldn't quit staring. "How common is that rite?"
"It took him almost a century. There's a few different ways. We're tracing it now," Barrings said, not watching the film. He had seen it earlier. He looked at Cooper. "The twins are coming in the day before. We're going to be watching over the weapons."
"Thank you," Cooper said. "How do you kill that?"
"Take off the head. Though there's a mention of one dying during the eruption of Vesuvius," Senior Agent Henders, Barring's boss, said with a smile. "They eat poisonous spiders to be immortal during their last hundred days. They only heard it'd be happening two days ago."
Keen raised her hand. "How many others have there been?"
"Mostly, we stop them when we find them killing their sacrifices," Barring said, turning off the film. "We've correlated six attempting it." The agents all winced. "We're fairly certain this one made it. I'm not sure of their sources but you know them." They all nodded. "We'll also be getting Colonel Clay's team in because they're just off a mission. We asked since they're used to demon battles now." He looked at his boss then at them. "Agent Keen, we're going to share the book with the rituals with you so you can pass them on. That way if certain people hear that others are doing it overseas we hear about them too."
"Yeah, I can pass that on. I can only imagine if some dictator in some banana republic does it."
"Yes, that's our fear too," Henders agreed. "Or some semi-evil being. Though fewer women than men attempt it apparently."
"Interesting to note," she agreed. "What do the twins suggest?" The tape was restarted and fast forwarded through the battle to when the school exploded. "That's not a bad plan. Ours?"
"We're finding a way to trap it and then blow it from the side or however," Barrings said. "We have no idea where he'll be when he changes."
"Sure, count us in to help keep civilians away," Ressler said. They smiled at him. "Or take some artillery. As long as it's not more than point and shoot, I can do that."
"Usually they're that good, but do be aware that the boys don't know how to do it formally. Don't be expecting something nicely formed. Half of them have duct tape." The agents in the room all nodded. "They're learning better but it's going to be a while. Also be aware that most of them are too strong for normal means." He turned on the testing tape to show them. The agents all stared, mouths open. "Exactly. That one," he said after an explosion. "Is called a My Little Friend."
"As in 'say hello to'?" Keen asked. Barrings smiled and nodded. "Yeah, that'd be good. What about any extras?"
"It's their apocalypse vault for the Council," Henders said. The agents nodded at that. "Their vault is very secure and the CPD knows they have it."
"Good," Ressler said, shifting in his seat. "I know someone I want to introduce that one to."
"It's tiny," Barrings said. "Somehow they came up with a nicely compact chemical explosive design. They just can't turn it down. We're going to teach them other explosives." Henders looked up and said a quiet 'thank you'. "The eclipse is at ten in the morning in two days." They all set reminders. "I need all your phone numbers. We've got the subject under study so we'll let you know where he's headed." They handed over cards and left to go have nightmares.
Elizabeth Keen paused to get that book and tape then went to have a drink with a friend. She knocked on the door to this week's safe house, smiling at Dembe. "I got asked to share some information with him so he can warn people if he hears someone else doing it. Is Red in?" He nodded, letting her inside. "You need to see this too, just in case, Dembe." He led her to the room Red was in. "Got a DVD player?"
"On the computer," he said, putting his book aside to look at her. "You look like you need a drink."
"Yes I do. Before I have nightmares." She started the DVD, letting them watch it without her. "That was the twin's graduation," she said when it ended. Red was up pouring them all drinks. "This book has the few ways it can happen." She held it up. "I got asked to politely ask you to tell someone if you find anyone else doing it."
He took the book. "That's going to be nasty bedtime reading but I can do that."
"We've apparently stopped six thanks to finding their sacrifices but not the one in two days somewhere here in town." Red spluttered and choked. Dembe drank his whole drink. "The twins will be here with artillery they built. We were warned it'd have duct tape and be too powerful."
"I'm going to have someone teach them how to do that properly and how to make other explosives," Red assured her. He looked at the computer then at her. "Who is doing this?"
"They didn't say but Homeland, the agents who oversee the twins, have them in view. We'll be warned where they'll be right before the eclipse." She sipped her drink. "Ressler wants artillery too."
"If I find anyone else doing this, they're gone," he said. "I don't want to see another one again, Lizzy."
"They're immortal for their last hundred days. Something about eating poisonous spiders."
"Gross," Dembe said. "Thank you for the nightmares." He got up and walked off.
Red nodded. "That is a nightmare. Though I saw the beginnings of the warriors they became later in that battle." He got himself another drink and took Lizzy's glass to refill before she asked. He handed hers back. "Two days?"
"Ten in the morning."
"I'll... Make sure it's not near here? I'll gladly get out of the way."
"I can do that. Senior Agent Barrings asked specially for you to please tell someone reasonable if you find one. A few of us had the vision of someone doing it in some little republic where there's no news."
"Don't, please," he said, then gulped his drink. "I know some people who'd like the attempt at power. I'll make sure it won't happen." She finished her drink and left. He locked the door after her and settled in to read the book in case he already knew someone doing it. Thankfully he only knew one person doing ritual sacrifices. They were doing some sort of earth healing spell.
After the battle, Agent Keen went to the hotel the twins were hiding in, nodding at the one who let her in. "Xander, we need to do a post-incident debrief."
He looked at her. "There's tape."
"The government runs on paperwork." She smiled at the nagging slayers. "Sorry, ladies, but we need one from you as well. Is now a good time to debrief you for the report?"
"Report?" Buffy complained. "We don't have to do reports. We're slayers."
"The government said they wanted a report on this," Agent Keen said with a nice smile. "The government runs on reports. The FBI especially runs on reports. Even more than the IRS does." They groaned and fled. She smiled at the boys. "You're welcome," she mouthed, making them grin. "Though, reports." They sighed but handed over the one they had written out. "Thank you." She read it over then looked at them. "It's been noted that you guys don't see yourself as fully as we do. This report shows that. That's a weakness some agent can use to try to separate you from the girls." They groaned so she settled in to teach them how to write factual, concise, non-aggrandizing or minimizing reports.
Red showed up halfway through the reports. The twins gave him 'save me' looks. "After you're done with that, I've got someone to meet you two who can teach you how to make better looking weapons, boys." They smiled and hugged him. Lizzy laughed but finished up for them. They signed it once it was printed, then she left them alone. He stared at them. "I'm impressed. That last one that got used was much stronger than I thought it'd be."
"That was one we tinkered with. We only brought six and that was number eight," Xander said.
"How did you tinker that into being stronger?" He settled down to find that out. His weapons person showed up to go over the same information plus how you did good looking cases. Red wasn't willing to see the world ended while he was in it. He'd help the twins learn whatever they needed to know to do that.
Twiny Chaos In Action.